Growing Pains (1985–1992): Season 3, Episode 24 - How the West Was Won: Part 1 - full transcript

This is Ben's.

This is Carol's.

This is Maggie.

This is

Hey, what happened?

Ms.

Zendo called me in during recess and reamed me for being Truckee.

No truculent means nobody can't be good, but truculent means angry.

Ready to fight.

Oh, it was serious.

That is serious.



Good.

Hi guys.

How's the favorite man in my life.

Fine.

I'm fine too.

Oh, you did the laundry in between saving the sanity of a half a dozen people.

Well, you relax in, sit down.

I will give you one of my famous back rubs and then I will make dinner.

Oh.

Oh, you knew that it was going to be didn't you?

No, it doesn't mean that I have to go anywhere.

It just means that I have to call the newsroom.

Hello?

Yes, this is Maggie Malone.



You beat me.

There was a time Maggie when only I beeped you.

I said there was a time.

Yes.

Yes.

Right away.

I will meet the crew there, their codes dinner.

There's a big distributor to do.

We high they've sent six police cars.

Where's Mike.

Hello, Carol.

Where are you?

What?

Huh?

I can't hear Carol.

Carol Carol.

That was Carol.

She was calling from Dewey.

She didn't have time to explain it, but she said that she and Mike were about to be arrested.

What.

Sounds like Mike and Carol would be mighty truculent.

we're all making a big mistake.

Well, I still will not be intimidated by rabbi.

No

to sit in.

This is your last chance the police are on their way, honey.

Hey break.

Like the good old days.

Doesn't it.

Carol.

Hi, Mr.

Malone?

No, no, actually this is Greg

it's catchy scuttle buddies at the ringleader lives.

It's some kid named Mike seaman.

Yeah.

You know what?

Mr.

Law.

That's fine.

The camera mind intimidated what you should.

Let me find this kid probably isn't really involved at all.

I'll shoot some B roll of the cops getting into their riot gear.

You guys do in here, we can discuss that in the car on the way home.

He went to college.

Is it true that you see, and at the end of the Vietnam war, it would be a bit of an exaggeration, but I did.

Carol.

I expected you to have more sense.

Just price, any stuff.

Well, this cost isn't worth the sacrifice.

Jason, could we discuss this later?

There are police getting rolling?

I'm sorry.

I find it hard to believe that you have developed a commitment to anything beyond teenage girl.

I was pretty shocked myself.

When you just listen for a minute about what's going on here, you all go, they all squash.

It all started two days ago and post Levin's class, which leads us to the question.

Why did these people give up everything and head West and covered wagons?

Let me repeat that.

Why did these people give up everything and head West in covered wagons?

Stevo.

Cause if they headed East, they would've drowned the bone.

If I ever call on you again, just shoot me.

Okay.

Come on.

People we're talking pioneers, heading West and wagon trains.

Now.

Now why did they do it?

Well, they headed West for many reasons.

Some wanted a chance to start over.

Some wanted to make their fortunes and some were even running from the law.

What was common to all of them.

However, was an unyielding drive to follow a dream.

Even if its promise took them into danger and over distant horizon,

expect us to

just get to the part of the story that matters.

Okay.

All right.

All right.

So there we all were in class.

Bow, Holy people.

Now, remember your term reports are due tomorrow and they should be typed on a typewriter.

You know that machine where you put the paper in and it goes,

unless of course you have an IBM class dismissed, unless your last name ends in S.

That's right.

I'm talking to you.

Seabourn's devout, but that coach, we didn't even do anything, including your homework.

And that's why the both of you dim bulbs are going to sit here for as long as it takes to answer the 20 questions you were supposed to answer last night, but a coach.

How are we supposed to answer those questions?

If we haven't even read the book and he thinks we're dumb.

Now I hear the question sheets, feel free to answer and pan.

Pencil or crayon.

I have to go out and see Dewitt.

I'll be back in about a half an hour.

I expect to see something on those papers.

No body fluids, the bone

no, not necessarily where there's a will.

There's a way.

Are you kidding?

Look at this.

Discuss the Donner party.

What happened and its significance.

I don't even know who was invited.

Who's the girl in the third row with the falsies Susan Harris.

No, the other one.

Melody Lavinia.

No, the other one, she always gets straight.

A's Mikey, are you thinking about cheating off of us?

No, I thought of it already.

What do we have here?

Oh, it looks like coach Levitt's resume.

So it says here that he's 38 years old.

I thought it was a lot older than that.

Kid's resume.

He just lies about his age, just like my mom does.

Whoa, look at this.

It's just the coach married.

Can you picture coach Lubbock with a life?

Nope.

Imagine of just living alone in a room somewhere and watching TV while he drank beer and belts.

That's how I pitch him would want to marry coach Lubbock.

Excuse me

no, no, he just stepped out for a second.

He, you went out to Polish his head to tell him that when I get home, what he's my dad.

So I don't do any more at home.

Like you.

Hey, Cindy.

Where's dad.

Oh, I don't believe I've had the pleasure of do either of, you know, where our father is.

Oh, he ought in heaven.

He said something about going to the principal's office.

And look, I am really, really sorry about what I've done.

Worry.

I won't really tell him.

You said he was out polishing his head.

That is what you said.

I don't want to misquote you.

So not interested, windy

like that too bad when they get all of the glues their hair.

I feel like after all this time, I don't even know Lubbock at all.

And when he walks out of this building, he actually has his own life.

I mean, what does he do?

Well, where does, where does he live?

And does he have any more daughters that look like that that's not possible?

I mean, aren't you curious about little wouldn't you like to check them out and see where he lives, but we don't have his address.

I'm sure we do.

We had his resume.

His address is a PO box.

Ooh.

If I lived in a box, I'd be PO.

Okay,

Mrs.

McGillicutty you haven't been to the principal's office in a long time,

honey.

We got a problem, Mr.

attention.

He's hiding under his desk again.

Oh no, I'd better go drag him out of here.

so you think, sir, there's any chance of this thing turning around, sir?

Oh, about as much chances, maybe coming secretary of education.

So it's hopeless.

So me and bono were off to find out about coach loving, secret life.

We ended up outside his house over near JFK.

It wasn't a house.

It was an apartment.

And it looked like the kind of place where Cagney and Lacey pull out their guns and pretend they're men now, what are we doing?

Well, we look

okay.

I'm ready to go.

Come on.

Let's look around Doug.

We're going to be caught.

We're going to get cut.

We're gonna get cut.

Cut.

Doing like what?

Just a couple of guys cuddling on the floor of a parked car.

One two, three, four, five, six, seven, just Catholic.

Yes.

Paul

beautiful.

We can get arrested for peaking in windows.

We're not going to peak.

We're just going to want to check on their fire escape to make sure that it's safe.

I mean, we should have one thing to happen to those little girls now,

second floor.

Come on.

Yeah, it's probably two flights up.

Would you ask your mother to please control her bodily functions?

That's the only hobby she has.

Yes, she did.

And $1,600 is just way too much.

Yeah.

But it's later become a nun.

Well, that's a good idea.

I hear nuns have a very nice dental plan.

You check the labs.

I want everybody in the rooms doing their homework mother and I have some things we have to talk about daddy.

Everybody.

Did you want to talk to Mr.

Dewitt?

Yeah, I talked to that P brain twins.

And you changed his mind, right?

Just like I said, you would see honey.

I told you there nothing to worry about.

I changed nothing.

Nada, zip zero.

The little gopher didn't even listen to me.

So as of the end of the semester, I'm fired.

Graham, what are we going to do?

Hey.

Hey.

Hey, get that look off your face.

Look, you know the same look you had when you found out you were pregnant this last time, I can just get outta here.

Yeah.

Well, we got nothing to worry about.

Is that my resumes out, right?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Uh, 20 more today you think of that educator with my experience and qualifications, ain't going to be snapped up.

Huh?

Oh, Chris.

You're absolutely right.

I'm sure those first 50 just got lost in the mail.

I thought we was leaving

Elizabeth.

Put those pot pies on hold for awhile, which I'm going to step outside and get a breath of fresh air.

What the hell am I going to do?

I couldn't believe what I was seeing at first.

I thought he just must be sweating cause a coach sweats in a snow storm.

But the more I looked, I saw that he was, he was crying

long day money.

I wanted to tell you guys, but I didn't know how to tell you what I found out without telling you how I found out.

I didn't know what I was going to do, so I just acted cool.

So you guys wouldn't notice anything weird.

You're acting kind of weird tonight.

Good to see you too.

Um, listen, if you guys, excuse me, I gotta get upstairs and do some homework.

Well, this is where I come into the story.

I knew that something really serious was on my mind when he caught me exercising and didn't make one of his cracks.

Well, you know, like quick somebody push her back into the ocean or she would die.

I need to talk to you.

Why.

Well, then Mike told me everything he had seen and heard.

I never seen him like this.

He was actually thinking of someone other than himself.

Then if that weren't enough, he asked me the person who never listens to what he could do to save the coaches.

Carol, look, I mean, this guy has really given me a lot and I just want a chance to give him something back.

Okay.

Mike, what's your angle here, Carol?

I'm serious.

You?

Yes.

Karen, the what can I do to stop this?

Boy.

I don't know.

Well, what would you do if you were me?

Well, the first thing I do is find a good skin doctor.

Sorry, I couldn't let that opportunity pass your look.

Could you just try?

I mean, I mean, when I came in here and saw you exercising, did you see me go?

the only solution that I could see was to show Mr.

Dewitt, that many students felt the same way as Mike.

Well, if it fitting, convinced a way, at least it would frighten him.

So the next day, boner Mike and I spread the word and got over 300 signatures on a petition.

You'll see one of you now.

Oh, well, good luck, Carol.

No, no, no, no.

You started this whole thing.

Well, I'd like to give Mr.

Dewitt a piece of my mind.

You can't afford it,

but he hates me.

He does it.

Yes, he does.

But you don't.

Can you just, just work on keeping contempt out of your voice?

With a little practice.

It's easy.

God, I love my job.

Sit.

Oh, can I be of help young man?

Well, I'm Seaver.

Hi, sir.

Look, I don't know which one of your teachers sent you in here, but I have a meeting with a concern student right now.

So you're just going to have to wait outside that concerns.

Students are still.

As soon as I'm done with Seaver, I want to see you in here.

PDQ make it quick.

Yes, sir.

I will.

You see, I, uh, uh, some of us found out that that coach Lubbock is going to be fired at the end of the semester.

Not true.

It's not, Nope.

His contract simply isn't being renewed because there's a shortage of funds.

It's a tragic loss.

I'm sick about it.

Thank you for coming in,

but what's the difference between that and being fired?

Plenty you see on the one hand there's the, and on the other hand, of course you have what's this to you anyway.

See you, or what do you want to do?

What's your angle here?

No angle.

I mean, I like the coach and I don't want to see him go.

And you know, I'm not the only one over 300 other kids sign this.

Why do we teach children how to write coach loving is a good teacher.

He cares.

Well, he's not paid to care.

He's paid to win football games.

I don't ordinarily, I wouldn't say that in front of his student, but then you weren't much of a student.

So no, it's almost like you're saying that our opinion doesn't even count.

No, that's not almost like what I'm saying.

That's what I'm saying safer.

Don't try to play mind games on Willy Dewitt.

You don't have what it takes.

How can I play mind games on you when you don't even have them on?

Okay.

At that point, I probably want a teensy weensy step too far.

So we had to do something and this student was all that I have out.

Carol could think of Mike.

I don't know what to say me either.

I can't believe you talked to your principal that way, but just standing up for something he believes in.

Stand up now, we wouldn't have a problem.

Why don't you take a look around you?

I mean, this whole school was behind coach

assembly.

You're ordered to disperse immediately, or you will be arrested

please.

This phone will.

I got to go Mike Yang and loud to get arrested.

Louis.

We are going live in less than a minute and there's no violence.

There's no blood.

There's no Gore.

This isn't news at Sesame street.

Hold on, everybody.

Look, there's a lot more at stake here than just, just being arrested and, and getting our heads bashed in and with blood and guts and well, we don't need to dwell on that.

I am here to save coach Lubbock and I'm staying.

You are.

I R this is going on your record, Mr.

Seaver.

I'm staying too.

Me too.

I mean, I folks can't punish me if I'm in jail,

Carol, please.

Let's go.

They're talking about having you arrested, please.

My father is a policeman.

I'm sorry, mom, but I am in this thing and I'm staying, they'll have to bash us over our heads and carry out our lymphatics.

You'll wait until we go live young lady.

Can we please talk some sense of these kids?

Look, uh, kids here.

I think that, um,

What are you doing?

I'm sitting in by Maggie.

No, I'm sorry.

This is Maggie protest broke out earlier this afternoon.

attorney

to you, Jerry.

Okay, next on growing phase, all four would be charged with unlawful assembly, disturbing the peace being a public nuisance.

These are criminal

Jason.

They have been suspended from school.

Carol's perfect.

Attendance record is ruined.

112 years.

This dedicated man is about to be terminated.

Dad's been fired.

Why didn't you just shoot me, baby?

We got carried away.

And now that I'm out of work, are you going to help me keep those miles filled?

How are you going to explain to my constants why she can't have braces?

Are you going to help me send out another 65 resumes?