Growing Pains (1985–1992): Season 3, Episode 15 - The Marrying Kind - full transcript

Jason and Maggie (ALAN THICKE and JOANNA KERNS) are shocked when Carol (TRACEY GOLD) announces her engagement to Bobby (KEVIN WIXTED).

Carol: It's just that I'd always remember this winter formal dance, best night in my entire life.

Bobby: You know I don't even mind if it costs fifty bucks for the monkey suit.

Carol: You look so handsome Bobby.

Bobby: I feel good looking next to you.

Carol: Pardon me?

Bobby: Well, I...I mean I must be good looking we go around totally had looking is you.

Carol: Oh?

Bobby: I sure like your dress looking sexily falloff.

Bobby: I am sure glad you understand me.

Carol: Well, you understand me.

Bobby: I do?



Carol: What am I thinking?

Mike: I believe we have a record here?

Carol: Mike?

Mike: Really, even your shoulder is blushing in the air.Oh, except for Bobby's left white fingerprint, of course.

Carol: Mike Seaver, you are the drowsiest, rudest, most insensitive guy.

Mike: Please, Carol, please.I get a big head.

Carol: I am not going to let my stupid brother ruin this perfect evening.

Bobby: Good, 'cause I had something that I want to say.

Carol: Little conversation could be inhered.

Bobby: No, no, I mean not talking with words.

Carol: Oh?

Bobby: You see, I got a sort of surprise.

Carol: what?

Bobby: I've been thinking...



Carol: Really?

Bobby: No, that's not a surprise.You see, I love you.

Carol: Wow, Well, I love you too.

Bobby: We said it, Both said it.

Carol: Oh, We sure did.

Bobby: Carol, would you be my wife, would you marry me?

Carol: Marry?

Bobby: I don't mean it right now, I mean next year after we graduate, you see, if we don't... then you know...

Carol: Marry?

Bobby: I mean to get the football scholarship at one place; you'll get your real scholarship at some place else.

Carol: Marry?

Bobby: It could secure 'cause it's been the best even in my entire life.

Carol: Yes.

Bobby: Yes?What?

Carol: Yes, will be your wife.

Jason: Dropping the shaving mirror in the bushes.

Maggie: Why are you shaving hanging out of the window?

Jason: I just try to see what Carol and Bobby are doing since I cannot hear anything.They are on the porch... They have been on there for 28 minutes and 17 seconds.

Maggie: Well I'd like to spend at least the same long time to say that how silly you are, but I have to go to the bathroom.

Jason: Oh, silly?Am I?I am just silly to be worried about your teenager daughter, who's out with her very first dated boyfriend and who was wearing a dress that I certainly would never approve of if I could be said to her.Is that silly?Tell me, That's great, give me an understandable answer , Ok?

Maggie: Carol had a heart set on that dress, Jason.

Jason: Even if her dress has been cut in lorry be able to see her heart.

Carol: Mom, dad.

Maggie: What are you doing?

Jason: We wouldn't let Carol think we 've waited up for.

Maggie: We?

Jason: Well, you are not awake, aren't you?You sweet heart, honey.

Carol: Hi, just want to let you know that I got home, ok?

Jason: Just now?

Maggie: How was your first formal?

Carol: Oh, wonderful, everybody loves my dress,

Jason: Not bad.

Carol: Mon man dad, don't you think it's about time that we had Bobby's parents over for dinner.

Maggie: Of course, anytime.

Carol: Great, I knew you would say that.I had bobby invite them for next Friday.Good night!

Carol: Next Friday?Hold on.

Carol: What?

Jason: What's the hurry?

Carol: No hurry.Is there a problem?

Jason and Maggie: No, no.

Carol: Great, Oh, here dad, someone left your shaving mirror in the bushes.

Jason: The dern Ben.

Classmate: Absolutely it's the most fabulous thing that had ever happened.

Classmate: Is it a real diamond?

Carol: Well, of course it is real.That's why so small.

Classmate: Well, Carol Seaver is engaged.

Mike: I've just heard the dopiest rumor of my entire life; somebody is exactly spreading all around school that you and Bobby are, get this, engaged.

Carol: Good bye, Mike.

Mike: Wait a minute, Carol, You were serious?He, look, come on, Bobby is the first guy you ever went on with.

Carol: So ?

Mike: So, look, I am just saying that.Look, I wouldn't go often to marry the first guy that I ever dated?You know what I mean.Look, I am just saying chile dogs, chile dogs would be the first food that you ever ate.Ok?Say you ate dose day after day after days.You know?A couple of months probably puke your guts out.Right?

Carol: You are disgusting.

Mike: All right, forget Chile dogs, let's take pizza.

Carol: Let's not, ok?I've got to take classes, ok?Just don't tell mom and dad about these people before I do on Friday night ok?

Mike: Carol, you are crazy.They are going freak... Mom is going to do this until she is airborne, and dad's eyes are just going to bug out.I wouldn't surprised, if they shout out across the room.

Carol: Ok, they maybe react as that way first and then once it does settles, they'll hear our eer suitable reasons.I now realize just how committed Bobby and I are.

Mike: No, they all realize you should be committed.

Carol: Ben, soon Bobby's parents are coming over, I want you on company behavior tonight.

Ben: Yeah, Yeah, Yeah.

Carol: If you are to make a rude noise, leave the room first.

Ben: How rude?

Carol: Just leave.

Jason: Honey, how many times you've got straight those pillows?

Carol: I just want every thing to be perfect.

Ben: Oops, got to leave the room.

Jason: I wonder where she gets it.

Maggie: But I think you want to impress them.

Carol: Yeah, but our silver could intimidate them.

Jason: Ah.., well, we just eat with our hands and rip the food apart.

Carol: Mom, Dad... these are Bobby's parents

Bobby: oh, yeah.

Kitty: I'm kitty.

Maggie: I'm Maggie,

Jason: I am Jason,

Robert: I am Robert.

Maggie: Well, won't you come in?

Robert: We are in.

Maggie: Well, won't you come in further?

Carol: 4 Ice Teas and you whole?

Bobby: Oh, Carol, It's going just as you said.They started to talk and smile and everything.And my dad, my dad ...you mom says she likes Catharine and Nancy.

Carol: Let's not wait till after dinners to tell them.Let's tell them now.

Bobby: Ok, remember, let me talk first.

Carol: I'll talk, Bobby.

Carol: Ok, everyday, We have an announcement.

Mike: Wait a minute.I don't want to miss this.

Maggie: Kitty, Robert, This is my oldest son,

Mike: Mom, That's not important.Go ahead, Carol.

Ben: What's it all about?

Robert: Yes.

Ben: Is it going for the dinner?

Carol: First of all, I want you all to know that I am not pregnant.

Maggie: What?

Jason: Carol?

Robert: Somebody had better explain this.

Jason: Carol, what is it?

Carol: Ok, here goes.Next year a week after graduation after Bobby and I both chose our colleges.Bobby and I are getting married.They are taking it far better than I thought.

Maggie: Carol, you are not getting married.

Robert: Stupid thing in my life...

Carol: This is good, every body.Great!

Robert: What a family it is!

Mike: Listen to everyone and how to take advantage and instruct parents.

Ben: Tell me...

Jason: This doesn't make any sense.

Mike: Mom and dad.

Jason: Not now.Mike.

Mike: I was just wondering if I can go with Boner to this most grestling joy.

Maggie: Fine.

Mike: Thank you.

Ben: Well!

Robert: ...what did you think?

Bobby: I know, papa, she can...

Robert: I wait for an answer,

Ben: Mom and Dad.

Maggie: Not now, Ben

Ben: I was just to ask if I can eat everybody's dessert.

Jason: Absolutely not.

Ben: knot.

Jason: Ok, everybody!!!Now discussion is usually much more productive if we can be calm and rational.

Kitty: Yes.

Carol: Thank you, Dad.

Carol: Now, are you all ready to hear our reason?

Robert: I don't really want to hear kaka.

Maggie: How could you expect us to be common rational?

Kitty: Robert, you are standing on my foot.

Jason: We need to let our children give them out.All right?Carol and Bobby, We are sorry.

Robert: Sorry?What?

Maggie: Kids, Wait in the kitchen, the grown-up need to talk.

Carol: But you have to hear ......

Maggie: Carol?

Carol: We'll talk later.

Maggie: Jason, It's kids walking here and making this crazy announcement, that you apologize to them, that's so wrong.

Robert: Wow, That's right.

Maggie: Thanks, Robert, you are a sensible man.

Kitty: Robert, you are wrong.

Robert: Wo, we are not like these people we don't have a dominating woman in our family.

Maggie: Excuse me?

Robert: That's to say she was a daughter of Jason.

Jason: Wait, let's all just catch a breath here.

Maggie: Well, our daughter gets a what?

Robert: She's leading Bobby Robert's nose hairs.Just like you do Jason here.

Jason: What?

Bobby: I mean you know the part of our plan, they all just get so mad and let it out.I don't know, Carol.I think it's working too good.

Carol: Yes, my dad is trying to do.I am sure he has now got them all calm down and ready to talk.

Robert: Well, fine then.You stay where you are and we'll go and stay in kitchen.

Bobby: Oh, Carol, I think it will be ok.

Carol: You are so sweet.

Bobby: You think something.

Carol: Hi.

Jason: You and Bobby have to go.Somewhere else.

Carol: Where?

Robert: I got the suggestions.

Jason: Just go outside, cool off.

Bobby: It's not so hot here?

Carol: Come on, Bobby

Bobby: ok, honey.

Robert: You are wept.You hear me?She's getting you wept.

Jason: What a night!

Robert: What is with these kids?

Robert: They hold hands.Make googoo eyes in each other, they think they are in love or take a lot more than love that put up marriage.How are you doing?

Jason: I am basting the roast.

Robert: She's got you doing the cooking?No fancy belly.You are bigger than my kids.

Jason: I am expanding some nervous energy trying to figure out how my smart daughter could come up with something so stupid.

Robert: So you sense my kid's faults?

Jason: Of course, it is his fault.But the blame is not the issue here.We have to do with it rationally if you want to make headway tonight.

Robert: Right.How about if they ever see each other again, we break their legs?

Jason: Come on, Robert, now what if Kitty's father has frightened you, what would you have done?

Robert: What I did don't matter.Bobby is different.With this football scholarship ...he is going to be the first one in our family ever to go to college.I taught him the game.Everyday after work... I looked in.When we started, what's much bigger than the football.look, I think Carol is a real good kid I do.But she and Bobby has been out here.They don't know.And Bobby should don't need the person to be married before he gets to take the shot.

Jason: and don't you think Bobby would respond a lot better to what you said than to yelling.

Robert: Yeah, you would, so will you tell them?

Maggie: Look, Kitty.Bobby and Carol are so different.They want different things.I really think Carol give up, have a chance, she can really do the whole of the fatic.

Kitty: fatic... you are going to say fatic.

Maggie: But I don't mean that?I meant...

Kitty: Smarter?

Maggie: Yeah, you know.

Kitty: I don't think that's very fair.I mean as arkens go, then brains are not so important,

Maggie: You are right, Kitty, I am very sorry.

Jason: All right, is everybody ready to discuss this situation with reason and self-possession?

Robert: 'Cause we certainly are, right Jason.

Kitty: Robert, Have you been drinking?

Robert: No, we've been basting the roast.

Jason: Carol and Bobby, we are ready to hear your reasons now.

Robert: Certainly we are.

Carol: Point 1.by marrying before first-year college, we'll be able to take a small apartment off campus together.And therefore save our wonderful parents a great deal of money.

Maggie: Carol, a financial saving like that is not a reason to get married.I am sure being the same for your father.

Carol: Ok, all right.

Bobby: Hi, we've got a lot of more reasons Carol folk up.

Carol: Right, ok, point 2, you probably think we are too young to finish it.but I'd like to point out that we are about the same age that all of you were when you get married.

Jason: Carol, our situation is not relevant to yours.If you've got to make your case based on something that pertaining only to you and Bobby.

Carol: But dad, I ...

Robert: Nice move.

Carol: You swear you are going to listen to us.

Robert: He is listening.Look at him.

Jason: I am listening.

Carol: So all reasons don't really matter.You were just treating us children.

Jason: Kids, I mean people,

Carol: It stinks.

Bobby: If you cannot listen to us.Then I cannot listen to you either.

Kitty: But you haven't said anything, Bobby.

Bobby: That's because Carol is speaking for two.

Robert: So she is pregnant.

Carol: No, I am not.

Robert: Listen, bobby, bottom line.If you are on to still live under my roof, You've got to do what I say.

Bobby: Maybe I had better find another roof to live under.

Carol: How could you be so... so Berrintal.

Kitty: Well, we had a lovely evening.

Carol: Bobby.

Bobby: Carol.

Carol: What are you doing here?

Bobby: Carol, I was born the second myself tonight.I am not a man who is like, good with some ...

Carol: Words?

Bobby: Right.

Bobby: I am a man who is of...

Carol: Action.

Bobby: Exactly, you see, Carol, that's why we have been long lasting because you can make.You know...

Carol: Complete your thoughts?

Bobby: Sometimes you can suck off.Ok, here it is.You and me, we elope tonight.

Carol: Now?

Bobby: We had to elope before parents can make anything up.

Carol: Bobby, I don't know.

Bobby: But you can come up with some reasons that we shouldn't get married?

Carol: No, but...

Bobby: Ok, right.

Carol: But, tonight?

Bobby: Ok, you're right for each other, I am right for each other, it doesn't matter when and where to get married, doesn't it?.

Carol: No, but...

Bobby: Carol, I love you.

Carol: Well, I love you too.

Bobby: So, what will we be going to do about it?It's time for an...

Carol: Action.

Bobby: My car is parked in the street.

Carol: Oh, great.oh, I love you.

Bobby: I love you.

Bobby: Just thinking.By this time tomorrow, be kissing a Mrs.Robert.

Carol: Your mother is coming with us?

Bobby: There'll be you.

Carol: Oh, but I don't want to change my name.

Bobby: Oh?

Carol: I thought you knew that.

Bobby: No, I ... it doesn't matter.I love you.

Carol: Oh, I love you.

Carol: You know I am really looking forward to?

Bobby: Yeah, me too.

Carol: No, next year, we'll get our little apartment in Boston.

Bobby: Yeah, where?

Carol: Boston, where Harvord is.

Bobby: Oh, you want to go to Harvord?

Carol: It's always been my dream.

Bobby: Well, I thought we can go to a good school.

Carol: You don't think Harvord is a good school?

Bobby: No, not in football.You can get all big 10 schools, Ohio state, Michigan, Illinois and ..

Carol: What?

Bobby: Yeah, I thought you knew that, that is my dream.

Carol: But Hardvord is mine.Well, it doesn't matter.I love you.

Bobby: Are you cold?

Carol: Yeah.

Carol: I love you.

Bobby: I love you.

Bobby: Oh, we made it.

Carol: We sure did.

Carol: How all will it be great to have breakfast together every day?

Bobby: Yeah, and dinner too.I can see that I must rush home from the football practice, not expecting you to do the all cook, no serf.

Carol: So sweet.

Bobby: We can order out burgers, Chinese food and chile dogs.

Carol: Chile dogs?

Carol: I am thinking

Bobby: About What?

Carol: Chile dogs

Bobby: You want something else, You got it.How is it about pizza?

Carol: Maybe we are not doing the right thing.

Bobby: We talk everything over.

Carol: Yes.

Bobby: I propose, you accept it, Right?

Carol: Yes.

Bobby: We're also going to push the wedding date up a measly year.

Carol: I am not so sure about that.

Bobby: You always say we are perfect for each other.

Carol: I know, maybe we should just delay our planning.Next year we will get married...

Bobby: What are you talking about?What is it going to change in a year?

Carol: Well, I can't ...

Bobby: Why are you going to change?

Carol: Bobby...I..

Bobby: One thing is going to be different.

Carol: I can't ...

Bobby: So if it's good idea to get married a year from now, then it's also a good idea to get married tonight.If it is, then the whole thing is a mistake.

Carol: There's so much I didn't think about.

Bobby: Yeah.

Carol: You're not arguing with me.

Bobby: I...I can't.

Carol: Yeah.Well, I should return this.Sure, it was expensive.

Bobby: Thanks.

Carol: So...

Bobby: So...

Bobby: I see you around sometime.

Carol: Yeah, Your jacket?

Bobby: No, You keep it.

Mike: Aha, thanks a lot, Boner.Drive safely.Oh, Carol, I.., you scared me.But then again you are always scary.

Carol: Mike.

Mike: It's ok, Carol, it's ok.
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