Grey's Anatomy (2005–…): Season 16, Episode 16 - Leave a Light On - full transcript

A month ago, you were in med
school being taught by doctors.

Today you are the doctors.

The seven years you spend here
as a surgical resident

will be the best
and worst of your life.

♪ Da, da, dum, da, dum ♪

♪ Da, da, dum, da, dum ♪

There's an old joke
doctors like to tell.

"Hey, Doc, it hurts
when I go like this."

♪ Da, da, dum, da, dum ♪

♪ Da, da, dum, da, dum ♪

And the doctor says,
"Well, don't go like this."



♪ Meet me in the crowd ♪

It's a lame joke,
but it's nonetheless true.

♪ People, people ♪

Okay, folks.
Meeting time.

Please take your seats.
♪ Throw your love around ♪

As human beings, we can't help

but want to follow
our instincts...

♪ Love me, love me ♪

Hey!
♪ Take it into town ♪

I, uh, went back to the loft

and got you another bag
of your stuff.

Oh. Couldn't find those ugly,
fuzzy socks you like.

♪ Happy, happy ♪

...to follow our guts...



That face is over socks?
♪ Put it in the ground ♪

...our primal urges...

Uh, some bills, some junk,
and, uh, top letter.

♪ Everyone around ♪

♪ Love them, love them ♪

...no matter how much
it may hurt.

♪ Put it in your hands ♪

♪ Take it, take it ♪

♪ There's no time to cry ♪

♪ Happy, happy ♪

♪ Put it in your heart ♪

♪ Where tomorrow shines ♪

♪ Shiny,
happy people laughing ♪

I'll sit with you.
We can read it together.

I got it.

I got it.

♪ Da, da, dum, da, dum ♪

♪ Da, da, dum, da,
dum ♪ You know where to find me.

♪ Da, da, dum, da, dum ♪

♪ Da, da, dum, da, dum ♪

♪ Shiny, happy people
holding hands ♪

♪ Shiny, happy people
laughing ♪

Dear Jo...

Mer, this is not
the way I wanted to do this.

Dear Dr. Bailey, I regret to
inform you, blah, blah, blah,

that I will not be
returning to Grey-Sloan.

The last thing on Earth
I want to do is hurt you,

but I'm leaving.

I already left, actually.

I'm gone.

This is not the way I wanted to
do this, but you know me.

Any chance
to take the easy way out.

Or maybe that used to be true.
I don't know.

God, I hate nurses.

I'm Alex.
I'm with Jeremy.

You're, uh... You're with
the Nazi, right?

She may not have pneumonia,
you know?

She could be splinting,
or have a P.E.

Like I said, I hate nurses.

What did you just say?

Did you just call me a nurse?

Well, if the white cap fits.

What I do know is
I owe you the truth,

and I don't know how else
to tell you.

But you know as well as I do
if I showed up on your doorstep,

you'd yell
or give me guilt or crap

or whatever you do that
seems to always set me straight.

We're grown-ups.

We can't run.

We have to face up to
the stupid things we do.

- Alex!
- Get off!

Supposedly, if you
face up to them,

something good comes out of it.
I don't know what.

You were always the one
to set me straight...

God, I smell good!

You know what it is?

It's the smell
of open-heart surgery.

It's awesome.
It is awesome.

- You gotta smell me.
- I don't want to smell you.

...to point out when I was
being an ass. Oh, yes, you do.

You have got to be kidding me!

Okay, I have more important
things to deal with than you.

I have roommates and boy
problems and family problems.

You wanna act like a little
frat-boy bitch? That's fine.

You wanna take credit for
your saves and everybody else's?

That's fine, too.
Just stay outta my face.

And for the record,

you smell like crap!

And when that didn't work,

you'd flop in my bed
and say the one perfect thing

that would make sense.

But the thing is,
I can't come back.

I can't face you.

You can go.

What are you gonna do
if I leave?

It's just us now.

There were five of us,
and now it's just you and I.

And it can't be just me.

It seems like five seconds ago,

we were the interns
hiding in the tunnels.

Alex!
Get off.

Look, I'm not gonna stay
in Seattle

just because you don't want
to be alone.

I deserve the guilt
and to be called an ass,

but I don't want to be
set straight.

I don't want you
to say the right thing

because the one perfect thing
isn't in Seattle.

Not anymore.

Yang left me
her shares and her board seat

and... she left me you,
too.

It's just us now.

I don't know... if you need
somebody to bitch to

or just be...

My person.

I don't know what you mean.

But you do.

Apparently,
I'm your emergency contact.

I want waffle Sundays.

Like a family, all of us...

everybody, all together.

Okay.

I want to do that
as long as we can.

- It's important to me.
- God, get off! Stop it!

Oh, my God.
Ohh.

But I swear, it's not
about work or you or Jo.

It's about me.

I left.

And I'm with Izzie.

This is probably the part where
you're gonna get on your phone

and call a million times

and leave hateful messages
on my machine

till I call you back.

But I can't, Mer.

I can't lie to you,
and I can't promise

I'm gonna come home
because it's not home anymore.

- Go make her happy.
- Yeah.

When you were in danger
of losing your license,

when I called everyone
to write letters

and show up on your behalf,

I called Izzie, too.

I want to say
I hoped she wouldn't answer,

but the truth is
I hoped she would.

I want to say,
"I had to call her for you,"

but that would be a lie.

The truth is your trial gave me

an excuse good enough
to call her.

'Cause I wanted to know
where she landed.

Today is the day my life begins.

All my life,
I've been just me...

just a smart-mouth kid.

♪ Beyond a story book ♪
Today I become a man.

Today I become a husband.

Today I become accountable
to someone other than myself.

♪ And learn our souls
are all we own ♪

Today I become accountable
to you,

to our future,

to all the possibilities
that our marriage has to offer.

Together,
no matter what happens,

I'll be ready...

I wanted to know
if she was alive and well.

Screw the DNR.

Hand me those paddles.

- Clear.
- I wanted to hear her voice.

I'm a bride.

Iz, come on. I'm getting
her a real one. I love this one,

and that makes it a real one.

When she picked up,
I blurted out the whole thing

about you picking up trash
off the street

and needing a letter that proved
you're better than that.

And she laughed and said,

"Of course she'd be
trash-picking,

trying to save the world."

Today, Izzie Stevens,
our life together begins.

And I, for one, can't wait.

And then these voices
were in the background

and a girl was singing
this song about

"greasy, grimy gopher guts"
that I learned in first grade

and I started laughing and I
asked if she had kids and...

Izzie got quiet.

For so long, she was quiet,

and finally, she said,
"Yeah, I have kids."

"Twins." ♪ I know
that I am nothing new ♪

And it turns out
they're my kids, Mer.

♪ There's so much more than
me and you ♪ Izzie's and my kids.

She had our kids.

♪ But, brother,
how we must atone ♪

♪ Before we turn to stone ♪

I love Jo.

Deeply. Still.

I think I always will.

And if it was just about
two women I love,

I'd choose my wife.

You know I would.

Hey.
But it's not just her.

Izzie made our kids.

I snooched into a cup
for you today.

Um... thank you?

She was single
and wanted children

and couldn't have 'em because
the cancer nuked her eggs.

But she had our embryos.

Back then I was too freaked out

to care about what she did with
them if we never used them.

You think a Dixie cup
full of my swimmers

will make everything okay?

It's crap. This is crap.

You just can't go messing
with people's heads like that.

Even if she freezes the embryos,

you think... you think
we'll get a chance to use them?

You think she'll still be here?

You think she'll survive
all this?

Do you think...

She t-told me...

she told me she was seeing
a ghost, okay?

And I'm so used to all
the crazy chicks in my life

that I didn't even...

I'm a doctor.

A doctor!

And I didn't even think to...

And now she's...

This is...

This is wrong.

This isn't
how it's supposed to happen.

I know.

It's crap.
I know.

I hate this.

I know.

This isn't...

This isn't how we...
How we were supp...

this isn't how I wanted
to do this.

This isn't how Izzie and I
were supposed to make a baby.

So I signed papers
saying she could do

whatever she wanted with them.

And so she used them.

And she had twins.

Eli and Alexis.

I should have told Jo
or told you, but I didn't.

I got through the trial
and then I came here

and I met the kids.

Met my kids, Mer.

They're five.

And hilarious and stubborn
as hell, just like Izzie.

Like this little team
that gangs up on me

with stubbornness
and sticky hands.

Hi, horsey!

And the second I walked
in the door,

they wanted to show me
their rooms

and the look on their faces
when they were showing me

all their toys and books and...

asked if they could call me...

Dad.

They both want to be doctors,

and Izzie teaches them
to bake just like her.

And they scribble
pictures of stethoscopes

all over the walls in chalk.

And Alexis...

...oh,
she's got Izzie's eyes.

And Eli smiles crooked
just like I do.

And now I live on a freaking
farm in Nowhere, Kansas.

And the kids play
with the chickens

and Izzie goes to work
as a surgical oncologist.

Oh, and she's amazing, Mer.

The progress she's made.

She's alive.

And she's a miracle
and keeping other people alive.

And I'm applying
to the hospital nearby.

And I wanted to be mad at Izzie
for keeping them from me,

but I can't because all I am
is grateful she made them.

Oh, they're so damn smart,
smarter than I was at their age.

Hell, sometimes at my age.

And they get to
have everything...

a home where they feel safe
and loved,

and they play "sleepover,"

where they just keep
swapping beds non-stop,

all night until
they land in ours at 4:00 a.m.

And they wake up
with two parents,

when I rarely ever even had one.

Oh, I love them, Mer,

with every inch of me
and every cell,

and I get to be their dad.

I'm the guy who lied
and said I only had one ball

to get into Seattle Grace.

And it worked.

I got a job and a career I love
based on a lie

that no one really cared about,
and I made it work.

And when I look at my kids

and doubt if I know
how to do right by them,

I just think of you and Zola
and Bailey and Ellis.

You're so brave. And you've
grown into this incredible mother,

this incredible surgeon.

You did that.

You always said Cristina
was your person.

Then I was your person.

But you've always been
your own damn person,

a force of freaking nature.

You've never needed
anyone but you.

And you can come here, you know?

You... You...
You could show up at my door

and... and get me
to walk away from all this

and just go back to you
and Jo and the hospital

and everyone who helped
me get here... two... one!

But I hope you don't.

Mer, you are my best friend,

and I will miss the hell
out of you,

but I'm finally
exactly where I should be.

I never had that before.

So, I hope you do come here
one day,

but not to ask me to leave.

I hope you come to meet my kids

and they get to call you
"Auntie Mer."

Because you'll love them,
and they'll love you.

And until you're ready
to do that,

try not to hate me too much.

Please?

Alex.

I'm sorry.

You deserve more than a letter.

I'm your intern for the day.

Oh. Well, hello, intern.
You have a name?

Jo Wilson.

Oh, nice. I like chicks
with boys names.

And this right here,

this cowardice, this letter?

It's officially
the worst thing I've ever done.

But it's about me, Jo.

It's not about you.

I don't live in my car anymore,
jerk. It's not what you deserve.

You deserve and have earned so
much better than this. I got you a couch.

Hey,
powdered sugar's your favorite.

Yeah, no.
Uh, this is great.

You wanted to hear me
say the words.

So I'm...
saying them right now.

I love you, Jo.

I love that you are
brilliant and brave,

and no matter
what you go through...

Hey, Brooke.

Oh, wait. It's...
It's "Jo" now, right?

...you never
let it hold you back.

Do I look like him? You
have my father's eyes...

You have an out.

It makes you stronger, kinder.

You made me kinder.

That works?
The compliments thing?

Mm-hmm.

God, you're sexy.

Doesn't work on me.

Ohh!

Oh. A little warning
when people are over

would be nice.

You loved me for exactly
who I was, and I loved you.

I'm gonna marry that girl.

Ohh! Yes!

I love you.

Maybe it's not fair to say that,
but it's true.

What's also true is...

...I'm in love with Izzie.

When I asked you

if you wanted
to move in with me,

you said that you did

and that you could
picture a life with me,

but you never said anything
about babies.

You said,
"Maybe we could get a dog."

Do you want a dog? No,
I want to know what we're doing here.

I love you, and you love me.

I know, but when I look ahead...

Why are we looking ahead?

If you had or maybe
you do have, for all I know,

a bunch of Izzie babies walking
around with your face on them...

And why are we doing it now?

And... And I'm just
the "Let's get a dog" girl?

You always ask about Izzie,
what she was like.

Well, that...
that girl right there.

That... That's what Izzie
was like.

I imagined this whole life
for her where she was baking

and happy
and had a bunch of kids.

Alex, if you want
to know how she is,

you should just call her.

And I never imagined me
in that picture.

You should call Izzie.

But suddenly, I am.

Not suddenly.
That's a lie there.

There was a part of me
that always wondered,

always wanted to know,

always felt
like we left things unresolved,

unfinished.

So, when Mer needed all those
letters, I reached out to her.

I reached out to Izzie
and we started talking

and it scared the crap out of me

because it felt like
no time had passed,

like Izzie and I were
kind of frozen together in time,

and now... now we're not.

She's not.

She's here in Kansas,

on a farm in this incredible
place in the middle of nowhere.

And I never, in a million years,

would think I belong here,
but I do.

And I can't lie to you...

...and pretend the truth
isn't the truth...

that I love you
and I love Izzie.

But if it was just me missing
her or nostalgia or whatever...

Will you stay with me?

...I would have been able to
walk away

and come back to you.

But Izzie had my kids.

And I know you get
what that really means.

I know you of all people

understand why
I can't just leave now...

...why I can't miss another
second of my kids' lives.

I have a chance
to make this family whole,

and I just hope you love me back
enough to let me take it.

I need to give these kids
the family you and I never had,

with barbecuing out on
the back porch and soccer games

and movie nights
and book reports.

Mom.

I didn't know
she would have my kids,

and now that she does,

I don't know how to look anyone
in the eye if I don't stay

and do everything I can
to make this work...

make this a life,
make this a family.

You were wrong.

You're not
the "Let's get a dog" girl.

And I was never holding a candle

or those pieces of paper

thinking anything
would ever change.

When I asked you to marry me,
I meant it.

And we'll be together
forever, right? You and me.

And if we have kids,
we'll be great.

I'll be a great dad,
and you'll be great,

and it'll be just us.

We won't need anybody else,
okay?

When I told you I love you,
I meant it.

But Izzie has our kids, Jo.

Our kids.

And the way you and I grew up,
I...

I-I came to meet them,
to start to know them.

I missed five years
of their lives.

And not because I was a junkie
like my dad

or off my meds like my mom.

I didn't exist to them until
I walked through the front door.

And once I did, I had this
family I never knew I had

on this insane farm,
and I wish I'd...

I wish getting everything
I always wanted

didn't have to hurt you
in the process.

But I can't lie to you.

And I can't come home.

Are you asking me to a dance?

No, I'm... I'm asking you
to come back home.

I'm not coming home, Jo.

I can't face you.

I can't look you in the eye

because I wouldn't be able to
walk away.

Maybe "I love you"
is wrong to say,

but thank you
for making me better

and taking care of me
when I needed it,

for taking care of yourself
when you needed it, too.

I went to a lawyer.

I signed divorce papers.

I left everything to you.
It's yours.

You worked for every cent
you ever owned and then some.

I also left you my shares
in Grey-Sloan.

Whatever you choose to do with
them, I know it will be amazing.

Just like you.

You know, I, uh...

I barely saw you this week,

and it sucked.

I'll find another job.
Whatever.

I, uh, but I don't want
to never see you again.

Oh, you deserve everything good
in this life, Jo.

I hope you find
so much better than me.

Thank you.

I'm... I'm sorry.

I don't know how to end this.

I don't want to.

Goodbye.

I'm guessing
you're not surprised by this,

and definitely not happy
about it.

They called me Evil Spawn
most of the time

growing up in your hospital.

Nice panties, Yang.

In your dreams, Evil Spawn.

It's probably
one of the better nicknames

I had most of my life,
to be honest.

I earned the name.

I know it, you know it.

Morning, people. Hell,
you probably know that better than anyone.

Truth is, you didn't like me
very much in the beginning.

I didn't really like you much,
either.

Sloppy, sloppy, sloppy.

Redo these and return them to me
before lunch, understood?

- Understood.
- Karev, don't tempt me.

And, Karev, see the chief
by the end of the day.

What for?

Do I look psychic to you?
He's the chief.

He asked, you go.

Karev, go stand in the hall.

Karev, cover the pit.
Pit!

Hate being an intern.

You were mean and impatient...
and knew everything,

and you liked everyone else
but me,

even when you pretended
you didn't.

Are you sure they're balloons?

You have reason to believe
they're not balloons?

This one here's got a face.

They all do.

I'll be damned.

They're Judys.
Judys?

He swallowed
the heads of ten Judy dolls.

Or you were convinced
I had "it"...

that something that would make
them great someday.

Hell, you named your kid
after O'Malley.

And Mer named her kid after you,
and you...

...you just seemed like all
my other teachers before you

who took one look at me,
decided I was garbage,

and that was all I'd ever be.

But here's the thing.

Unlike everyone else,
you let me grow the hell up.

He saved a baby's life. You
gave me crap when I deserved it.

You pushed my buttons
and my limits when I needed it.

What the hell? You are not some
hotshot surgeon right now.

Yeah, it's a teaching hospital
and all that,

but you did more than that,
and you know it.

Why is there a trailer
in my parking spot?

Is one of these yours?
My bad.

And, sure, it'd be pretty great

if I just stayed there forever

and repaid you
for everything you did for me.

But you and I both know I can't.

Never could.

You helped me grow the hell up,

and you took a bullet
out of my stomach.

You paged me?

I did. I have a surgery.

You're actually gonna let me
near a patient? You are the patient.

Get in there and get
on that table. Oh...

I don't need a reminder
of this thing.

I'm gonna carry
that day around with me

every day
for the rest of my life.

I don't need a reminder
every time I look at you.

And I'm tired of bullying you,

so I am asking you,

please, get in there
and get your shirt off.

You protected Jo from herself,

and if I started the whole list

of everything
I learned from you,

I would never stop writing.

And right now my hand hurts.

So just know this.

It took me
a long time to say it,

but I'm a good peds surgeon.

I'm an okay guy.

I'm still trying.

But I'm a really
damn good surgeon.

We got movement!
And I don't mind saying it now

because I didn't
figure it out myself.

You kicked my ass
and asked more of me than anyone

and hired other teachers
who kicked my ass

and asked more of me.

Karev, I hear that
you're the future of peds.

Excuse me? Yeah, a little birdie
named Bailey whispered it in my ear.

I want you to work with me today so I
can see if she's right. What did she say?

That you're the best babysitter
in the hospital.

Shut up.

And I know who I am.

I'm not that guy with a million
Catherine Fox Awards on a shelf.

Goodbye, Mom.

Bye.

A junkie dad, a crackpot mom,

and somehow Karev
still became a doctor.

I'm not easily impressed,
but I'm impressed.

I became the guy you
trusted to run the hospital

and keep your secrets.

And now...
It's okay.

...and now I'm a surgeon,
a friend,

a father of two incredible kids
with Izzie Stevens,

which I'm sure is breaking
your brain.

But it's true.
Nothing!

I'm all these things.

She been out there all day?

And by the way, I have a shot

at being Chief of Peds
at Shawnee County here,

but I'm guessing
you're the last person

I should put down as a rec
right now.

Okay, look, the... the kids
keep asking for pizza sushi,

and I have to go tell them
that's not a thing.

And if I say any more
in this letter,

there are going to be feelings
all over the place.

Yours, not mine.

And, really,
I'm just writing to say goodbye.

And thanks.

And that sounds lame and small

compared to everything
you've done,

but there it is.

Goodbye, and thanks.

I love you, Dr. Bailey.

Dr. Alex Karev.

- Richard, alcoholic.
- Hi, Richard.

See one,

do one,

teach one.

That's been the motto
of every hospital I run,

every teacher I've loved.

I loved being a surgeon,
saving lives,

giving people back
their families,

their loved ones,
and their friends.

Giving them back to them
when all seemed lost.

And I loved my students,
not because of ego...

I'm done.
I'm done! I'm done!

...but because it gave me that
same rush, that same feeling...

That's why I'm the chief.

It's like you're helping
to keep people alive,

keep families alive.

And then this morning,
I wake up to a letter

from a student of mine,
who, well,

let's just say he's not the one
I would have put money down on.

What happens, uh,
if I... if I take the exam

for a second time
and I don't pass?

You will no longer be a surgical
resident at Seattle Grace.

Failing again is not an option.

What's the big deal? Well,
the big deal is you're...

you're sweaty and you
and you smell.

And you're not going into my OR.

What the hell's the matter
with you today?

This is a teaching hospital,
okay?

You were the chief for 20 years.

You're supposed to be
teaching your residents.

Oh, I think I taught you
something today.

You don't give up a
once-in-a-lifetime surgery,

not for any reason,
not for anyone, not ever.

But he... he did the work.

Yeah.
He... He showed up.

He... He stepped up.

Became an excellent student,

- a stellar surgeon.
- 10 blade.

You're an underdog,
aren't you, Karev?

It's not that you don't
have the skills.

You have the skills.

But you're scrappy.
You're a fighter.

I like that.

I always root for the underdog.

A fine teacher.

He was working
with the best of the best.

But instead,

he chose to abandon it all

for who he says
is the woman he loves.

And for the two children
they now have.

You know, I wanted to
look him straight in the eye

and yell at him and...
and tell him

that he's made a mistake,

that it feels like a mistake.

I've been there before, yeah.

I've fallen in love with two
people at the same time,

and...

And I know all you can do
is go with what your...

your bones and your guts
and your heart tell you to.

I wanted to grab him
and shake him and tell him,

"Don't give it all away.

Not now.
Not for... for this."

But I missed my chance to watch
my own child grow into an adult.

And I would give anything to
have those years with Maggie.

I'd do anything.

I guess, um...

I just wanted to say goodbye.

I just wanted to say goodbye.

Hey, Dr. Webber.

I-I didn't want to work here,
either.

You know, at Grey-Sloan,
I inherited a-a legacy.

Bailey's legacy, your legacy.

You know, I mean,
every choice I made,

I heard your voice in my head...
"Don't settle. Do better."

At Grey-Sloan,
failing was our last option.

But here, failure's the culture.

But we can change that.

Help me turn this place around.

Help me do the impossible.

I wanted to say thank you
for helping me

to be a better doctor,
better teacher.

I mean, anything.

But he up and left...

Karev! Do better!

...with only a note
and an apology, and that's it,

not considering that I might
want to say goodbye

as a teacher...

Watch your back, Karev.

I may decide to teach you
something tomorrow.

Time of...

...as a colleague...

Time of death... 15:42.

...as a friend.

See one.

Do one.

Teach one.

I've seen people leave.

I've done the leaving.

Richard! Richard!
Richard!

I was gonna ask you
to be by my side

for the rest of our lives.

I'm not sorry
about a damn thing.

And lately, it seems like
all the people I love just...

...they just disappear.

And...

I can't...

find a way to make it stop.

Alex, if you want to
know how she is,

you should just call her.

You should call Izzie.

No.

No, it's okay.

No.

I mean,
I-I-I don't need to call her.

I know how she is.

I mean, she's, uh...

she's married with three kids,

and she lives somewhere,
I think, uh, kind of woodsy?

And she's a surgeon
and she goes to work every day,

so she refuses to hire help,
so her house is always a mess.

And it has Christmas decorations
all over it

because she won't let
her husband take them down.

It smells like muffins,

and she's...

she's smiling.

When I picture her,
she's always smiling.

I don't need to call her because
I want it to stay that way.

I picture her
as happy as I am with you.

You imagined
a whole life for her?

Oh, yeah.
It's way better than wondering.

♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪

Hi, Izzie Stevens.
Washington.

Hi, Alex Karev. Iowa.

What program are you in?

- Surgery.
- ♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪

Seriously?

Seriously.

Morning, Dr. Model.

Dr. Evil Spawn.

- Ooh. Nice tat.
- ♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪

Do you ever wake up
in the morning and realize

nobody likes you
and, I don't know, care?

Oh.

I think somebody likes me.

What is she doing?

She's hanging out with Alex.

♪ Let's go to sleep with clearer heads ♪
- What?

There's a discussion
we could have

if you wanted to have one.

I kissed you with tongue...

♪ And hearts too big to fit our beds ♪
- ...and I plan to do it again and again.

Get used to it.

Ow!

I care about you.

♪ And maybe
we won't feel so alone ♪

And I'm not gonna stop
caring about you,

no matter how hard
you push me away.

Shut up and get out of my room.

No.

- I care about you.
- ♪ Before we turn to stone ♪

And I know
you care about me, too.

It is not too late for us.

Admit that
you care about me, too.

I know you do.
I care about you.

♪ And if you wait for someone else's hand ♪
- I care about you.

I care about you.
I care about you.

I...

♪ Then you will surely fall down ♪
- I think with you, you make me better.

Oh! You make me
want to be better.

You make me want to be good.

And I think I can.

♪ And if you wait for someone else's hand ♪
- With you, I think I can.

And if you want to be scared,
that's okay.

Just be scared with me.

I don't want to be
the future of this hospital

if you're not there with me.
- ♪ You'll fall ♪

♪ You'll fall ♪

I didn't know you still
felt that way about me.

Me neither.

♪ I know that I am
nothing new ♪ I love you.

What?

I love you.

I freaking love you.

I can totally see you
in ten years...

♪ There's so much more ♪
- ...a little salt and pepper in your hair,

- big-shot attending.
- ♪ Than me and you ♪

You're gonna be
a rock star, Alex.

Shut up.

♪ But, brother,
how we must atone ♪

I love you.

♪ Before we turn to stone ♪

♪ Before we turn to stone ♪

You taking my spot
on the couch tonight?

Miranda, is...?

Alex Karev isn't coming back.

Left his wife,

his friends, his job.

Alex Karev is now a father
of two with Izzie Stevens.

And, if they take my
recommendation seriously,

he'll soon be Chief of Peds
at Shawnee Memorial.

What's this got to do with Joey?

Now, it is a matter of luck,

of grace that Alex Karev
is who he is today.

He could have just as easily
been lost to this world,

aimless.

But he survived his home,

his family, his foster homes

and became a man,

now a father,

a fine surgeon by luck,

by chance.

Joey's future shouldn't
be a matter of chance.

A child's future
can't be a matter of luck.

Okay.

"Okay"?

Just like that? "Okay"?

I just wanted to talk about it.

I mean, you and I,
look, we... we both make

these big, sweeping decisions
without each other.

You... You had a heart attack
and didn't tell me.

You... You had a miscarriage
and shut me out.

You... You change
careers like sweaters.

Yeah.

And I am down
for all of it. I...

All the change and the easy
and the hard that comes with it.

Of course Joey should have you.

Should have us.

He should have a family.

But...

that family needs to learn to
talk to each other first, okay?

I'm sorry.

I know.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

Congratulations, Miranda.

It's a boy.

A teenage boy!

It's another boy.

♪ I don't know what,
I don't know what ♪

♪ I don't know
what's happening ♪

You can quit hovering.
I'm not hovering.

♪ I swallow the pain, drink in your poison ♪
- I'm... deciding

whether to come in or give you space...
- ♪ Darling, it hurts so sweet ♪

♪ I try to run, try to run ♪
- ...or take you day drinking.

♪ But I come back again ♪

Okay, whiskey it is.

♪ I look in your eyes,
don't have a choice, yeah ♪

♪ You'll be
the death of me ♪

Pierce is paging me
for a cecal bascule

for one of our cabbage patients.

Okay.
- ♪ It'll cut you deep ♪

Whiskey tonight.
- ♪ It'll watch you bleed ♪

Today I am working.

♪ Nothing hits as hard
as when we touch ♪

♪ How beautiful and brutal is your love? ♪
- You're my hero.

Mine, too.

We hold onto hope,

thinking one small detail,

one tiny piece of information

will somehow make things right,

make it different,

make it okay...

stop the world
from spinning off its axis.

Mom, Uncle Alex said when
I finish my science project,

I'm supposed to show him.

Can you show me?

He helped me come up with it.

It's a dog feeder.
See?

When the dog walks
on this lever,

the pulley tips
the bucket over and...

That is so smart!

All we need is a dog.

So, can I show him?

Can we go and show Uncle Alex
right now, please?

♪ Don't care how hard
I gotta suffer ♪ - Um...

Come sit here.

♪ I'm waking up
in your covers ♪

♪ Beautiful and brutal ♪
- Your Uncle Alex loves you so much.

♪ Cuts you deep ♪

And I just got a letter
from him.

♪ It'll watch you bleed ♪
- You did? I did.

When the truth is...

♪ Nothing hits
as hard as when we touch ♪

...there's really
no good way to say goodbye.

♪ How beautiful
and brutal is your love? ♪