Grey's Anatomy (2005–…): Season 11, Episode 4 - Only Mama Knows - full transcript

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Also, with the laparoscopic
common bile duct exploration,

post-op bile leaks
and strictures

are significantly minimized.

It was called, at the time,
an audacious technique.

And it was. [ Laughter ]

[ Chuckles ]

Some context for you.

I was the only woman in
my surgical residency program.

They called me "girl"
and "Mrs. Grey."

[ Laughter ]

Along with
the one black male resident,



i was clearly excluded.

They didn't want me to be
a part of their boys' club.

So I did the only audacious
thing you can do

with an audacious technique.

I got myself published

in the journal
of American medicine."

That caused an uproar.

A resident was not first author
of a published paper.

But the truly audacious part
came when they saw

what I named my technique --
the Grey method.

I put my own name on it.

You should have heard the boys
roar about that.

[ Laughter, applause ]

The first time
i won the Harper Avery,



i dedicated it to the men
who had been so supportive.

[ Laughter, applause ]

[ Remote clicks ]

Meredith: This is how my mother
wanted to be remembered.

My memory of her is...
A little bit different.

Ellis: Where is the chief?!
You're all amateurs!

Woman: Complaining
of intermittent cramping...

What the hell are you doing
here? Haven't I told you?

How many times have I told you
not to bother me

when I'm at work?!

I'm sure everyone remembers
their own version of her --

versions I wouldn't even
recognize.

It's all that's really left
of someone when they're gone.

[ Crying ] No.

But that's the tricky thing --

Meredith.

Nobody's memory
is perfect or complete.

Mommy.

Meredith, get up.

We jumble things up.

[ Siren wailing ]

We lose track of time.

We are in one place...

And another. [ Baby crying ]

And it all feels like one long,
inescapable moment.

[ Siren wailing ]

It's just like
my mother used to say --

the carousel
never stops turning.

Meredith: I spent the day
with Alex.

I needed a day, Derek,
so I took it.

That's fine.
I just need to know why.

No, you don't.

You want to hear
that I cured cancer

or that I found a vaccine
for als before breakfast.

That'd be great.
Anything would be great.

There it is again. What?

You're waiting for me to pay up

for this grand sacrifice
that you made for our family.

How am I supposed to do anything
with you pressuring me

and hovering over me
for a decision that you made?

And you're waiting
for me to fail.

I'm waiting for you to shine.

Remember?
That's why you're staying here.

And I told you, you should go
to D.C. and shine there.

It was you who decided
to stay here and martyr yourself

and now make me feel guilty
because of a decision you made.

Well, I am done.

I'm done feeling guilty,

and I am done measuring my
accomplishments against yours.

I won't do it anymore.

Just stay out of my way.

Wow. You sound
just like your mother.

What happened to you?

Listen to me, Meredith --

anyone can fall in love
and be blindly happy,

but not everyone
can pick up a scalpel

and save a life.

I raised you to be
an extraordinary human being.

So imagine my disappointment
when I wake up after five years

and discover that you're
no more than ordinary.

What happened to you?!

[ Breathing heavily ]

This is crazy.

Is has to stop.

I didn't hear you complaining
a few minutes ago.

I heard something.

I wouldn't call it complaining.

We're gonna get caught.

[ Scoffs ]

We've had
so many close calls already.

[ Sighs ]

Is what we're doing so wrong?

Don't be naive.

Seattle's a small city
with a small-town mentality.

So let's leave Seattle.

Richard,
you deserve to be happy.

[ Indistinct conversations ]

What?

Nothing.

Just surprised to see you here.

I'm working here.

Oh.

[ Elevator bell dings ]

What? Nothing. That's great.

Just, um -- well, I thought
Bailey won the board seat.

She did.

They hired me back
as a peds surgery attending.

Oh! That's great.

That's really good.
That's awesome for you.

Congratulations, man.
Okay, you know what?

Shut it. I am a great surgeon.

It's not like
they're doing me a favor.

I'm doing them a favor.

Besides, Robbins told me
that board vote was very close.

Okay. O-of course.

[ Elevator bell dings ] What?

Nothing. Just...

I will assign you
to impacted bowels for a month.

They'll call you
"pooper scooper."

Robbins told Bailey
it was unanimous.

[ Elevator bell dings ]

Robbins.

Ah, there you are.
Hey, welcome back.

Can I talk to you?

Yeah. Marty Secord in 2313 --

his liver enzymes
are looking good,

but I'm worried he might have to
go back in for an ercp,

so you make sure
you keep an eye on it.

[ Cellphone chimes ]

Oh. Ugh, I hear you, Dr. Herman.
Give me two minutes.

God, you have no idea
how lucky you were

to have me as a teacher
during your fellowship.

We have to talk -- one minute.

[ Cellphone chimes ]

My God, I am coming.

[ Cellphone dings ]

Oh, no. No. Bummer.

[ Cellphone dings ]

Wait. Maggie Pierce
is quitting?!

I know. I'm into it.

Avery, tell me I'm not losing
another cardio chief.

I am into it, all right?

My mother's
already called me twice.

It's a p.R. Nightmare.

Miranda:
She's damn right it is --

first Russell, then Yang,
now Pierce?

Yang and I busted our asses
interviewing people,

and now I have to start
this whole process over?

Well, evidently,
because it looks like

we hire from week to week.

We're a revolving door.

Hey, you heard about Pierce?

Uh, yeah,
I just read the e-mail.

Well, what should we do?

I don't see anything we can do.

Well... I mean,
we should talk to her.

Not me.

We-- okay, well,
I didn't mean you!

I meant all of us!

We should get
the whole board together,

do a full-court press.

Uh, yeah, yeah.
You spearhead that.

Well, I will.

Lucky for you, the board just
got a transfusion of new blood.

Maybe I could keep this place
from looking like a clown car.

Maggie Pierce cannot quit.

You cannot quit.

Maggie: Uh-huh. Word's out.
How you feeling, Roy?

[ Sleepily ]
I like this mattress.

I got to get me one of these.

Mine is all foofy.

[ Laughs ]
We will see what we can do.

What is this
about you resigning?

Graft's deployed.
Let's inject the dye.

Will you at least tell me
why you're leaving?

That is between me
and my employer, Dr. Shepherd.

Ah.

I'm seeing diminished perfusion
to the spine.

Roy, wiggle your toes for me,
would you, please?

Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle.

[ Laughs ]

Like that?

Wiggle a little harder.

Let me check
his babinski reflex.

[ Metal clicking ]

When the toes fan out
reflexively,

what's that indicate?

Jo: Just what you're
afraid of -- high spinal injury.

Is he paralyzed?

Try it again.

Roy: S-something's wrong?

I can't feel my legs.

What's happening?

Roy, it's possible
that the blood to your spine

has been cut off by the graft,

but I'm gonna do everything
I can to fix it, okay?

Okay. Please do. Please.

I'm gonna give you something
to let you sleep.

Start with trying
to induce hypertension.

See if we can enhance
spinal perfusion.

Meredith: Did you get
Maggie Pierce's e-mail?

I did, yes.

Are you going to
talk to her again?

She won't listen.

She doesn't trust me.

She's angry
I didn't tell her sooner.

So am I.

I just still can't even remember
my mother being pregnant.

I just -- I need that journal
from the spring of '83.

Do you have that one?

Uh, yeah, I have them here.

I mean, we both looked
at them a hundred times.

It's mostly surgical stuff.

Can you just dig it out for me,
please?

Okay.

Help! Can you help, please?

Come with me. What happened?

I was just dropping my friend
off when I saw her here.

She was lying --
she was all alone.

Run inside and tell someone
I need a gurney!

[ Girl whimpering ]

Honey, I'm a doctor.

What's your name? Nadia.

Nadia, tell me where it hurts.

Everywhere.

Oh, God.

[ Groaning ]

This is insane.
Is she laboring?

Blood pressure's really low --
78 over 45.

Let's get her a 600 cc
fluid bolus.

Nadia, Nadia,
how far along are you?

10. 10 months?

Alex: She's saying
she's 10 years old.

She doesn't know
what you're talking about.

Meredith: Rigid abdomen
with generalized tenderness.

Edwards,
let's get the ultrasound.

Nadia, where are your parents?

If she has a mother,
where the hell's her mother?

Well, she should be in prison.

Nadia, I need you to sit still.

[ Groans ]

I know. I know.

I just need to see if...

Just needed to see...

[ Sighs ] Okay. Okay.

Whew. What?

She's not pregnant.
It's not a baby.

Looks like a mass,
and there's free fluid.

Oh, thank God.
That was getting dark.

Nadia: [ Moaning ]

A mass the size of a soccer ball
is still pretty dark.

Okay, forget the C.T.

She's hypotensive
with peritonitis.

This mass may have ruptured.

We really should get her
up to the O.R.

I'll call up.

And then let's call the police
and child protective services.

Letting your kid get this sick
and then abandoning her

is still child abuse. Okay.

Amy, what do you need?

Maggie: On "three."
One, two, three.

Looks like paralysis caused by
s.C.I. During a tevar procedure.

I've induced hypertension and
adjusted the stent to alleviate,

but nothing has worked.

He needs immediate
spinal-cord drainage.

You're here.
Why do you need me?

I have stuff to do.
I thought you could take it.

Perks of being chief of neuro.

And this might be your
last chance to work together.

I was just telling Dr. Pierce

why I thought her departure
was such a bad idea.

I know, right?

I thought, you've been here
longer than I have,

you and Meredith.

Thought maybe you could
talk about it.

Derek's easy to talk to.

You can tell him anything --
anything.

[ Chuckles ]

Gown and glove, please.

Don't you have stuff to do?

Yes. Good luck. Good talk.

[ Indistinct conversations ]

Young Richard: The journal of
American medicine -- unbelievable.

What's not to believe?

The method.

You're calling -- you actually
named it the Grey method?

Well, what else am I gonna
call it? It's my name.

It's a little... audacious.

Meredith: Is that it?

Yeah.

Spring of '83.

Is there anything in there?

There's some surgical notes,
ideas.

Maybe you'll see something.
I didn't.

I have a surgery.
Thanks for this.

Miranda: We need to talk
about Maggie Pierce.

Bailey --

the e-mail said for professional
and personal reasons.

Now, you know
what that could be?

Well, why would I?
Well, you talk to her.

Bailey, she resigned.

We can't hold her
against her will.

I'm not saying that.

I'm saying, we change her will.

I'm trying
to get the board together,

but I think
you need to talk to her

like you used to talk to me,
you know, when I was first here

and I didn't know
my ass from my elbow.

I probably would have quit --

damn it, Bailey, she's leaving!

I can't do anything about it.

Just let it go.

Maggie: Almost done draining,
Dr. Shepherd.

Derek:
You know, I'm just curious --

speaking as someone who just had
a pretty great job

and then turned it down,

I know a rash decision
can be pretty disastrous.

Could we just call it
a bad fit?

We could if you'd been here
long enough to know that.

It's not the job.

Then what is it?

I'm sure your wife
has told you.

How we doing?

My wife -- told me what?

Oh.

Look, I know you two
have butted heads

and she hasn't been welcoming.

To say the least.
She's just one surgeon.

Why don't you just, you know,
stay away from her

until you figure out --
it's not as simple as --

[ heart monitor beeping ]

Oh, God.

You don't know... anything.

I'm sorry. What's going on?

You should talk to your wife.

Yeah, okay.
Let's get him on his back.

On "three."

One, two, three.

[ Exhales sharply ]

Amy: Derek, babinski reflex?

[ Metal clicking ]

Damn it.

I'm sorry, Dr. Pierce.

You did everything you could,
but this man is paralyzed.

No.

Nope. Prep for a sternotomy.

I need a bypass machine
in here, stat.

Wilson,
go get his wife's consent

for an open-heart surgery.

What are you planning on doing?

Maggie: I am going to fix it.

You can help if you want,
but if you're not gonna help,

I need you out of the way.

[ Door closes ]

Meredith: Mom?

Mommy?

Meredith...

Ellis: You grew up. I did.

Hmm. It's a shame.

It's awful being a grown-up.

But the carousel
never stops turning.

You can't get off.

[ Water running ]
Richard: You page me?

What do you got?

Yeah.

Do you remember the day
you met my mom at the carousel?

What?
That -- that's what you --

I remember this day.

I was on the carousel
at the park and you came

and then you were arguing
and she said something to you.

Do you remember what she said?

Meredith,
that was a long time ago.

[ Sighs ]

I-I don't remember.

Is that all you wanted?

Yeah, I just thought...

Forget it.

[ Sighs heavily ]

I was thinking about
what you said,

and it might be better
for them --

Thatcher and Adele --
ultimately.

Of course it would.

Let them find people
who will make them happy.

I never wanted to --

I never wanted to cheat...

Never imagined myself
a cheater.

You have the power
to change that, Richard.

It's in your hands.

I've been ready to do this
for a long time.

The question is, are you?

[ Sighs ]
The wife gave consent.

That's lucky. I've been
in his chest for a while now.

That was a bold bet.

Wait.
Is -- is that an aneurysm sac?

Did you just fix that?

Yeah, but now I'm gonna use it

to bring blood
back to the spinal cord.

Wait. I'm lost.

Yeah. I was, too, for a while.

He is paralyzed
because his aorta

isn't sending blood
to his spine.

So I replaced the aorta
with a dacron graft,

and now I'm rebuilding
the aneurysm into a second aorta

that will just send blood
to the spine,

kind of like a side road.

Is that -- you can do that?

Not many could, but she is.

I can see why
you want to keep her around.

Well, yeah, and...

Never mind.

And it'll work?

God knows.

It's a last-ditch effort.

Take me with you when you go.

Suction. And get another 6-0
of prolene ready.

Well, don't just stand there,
Wilson. Scrub in.

Meredith: Okay, the tumor has
taken over the abdominal cavity.

It's pushed the viscera
over to one side.

Let's de-bulk as much
of this mass as we can, unblock,

and when we get closer
to the organs,

we can resect it
piece by piece.

Fine.

What?

Edwards told me.

You guys were unanimous
for Bailey.

Who told you that?

Dr. Bailey.
Why would she do that?

I kind of had her back.

And you should have had mine.

You listened to my speech.
You said it was good.

It was good.
Then what the hell, then?

Bailey's was better.
Well, that's great.

Alex, you would make
a fine board member,

but Bailey will make
an exceptional one.

Is that what you want me
to do --

vote for you to be good,
to be fine?

You want my pity vote?

I wouldn't.

Derek:
Have you lightened sedation?

Okay. He is coming around.

Want to do the honors?

Roy. Roy, are you with us?

[ Groaning ]

Roy, you're okay.
The surgery is all done.

I just need you
to wiggle your toes for me.

Can you do that?

[ Groaning ]

Roy, wiggle your toes, okay?

Roy, wiggle your toes.

[ Sighs ]

Jo: Unbelievable.
[ Cheers and applause ]

All right, get him sedated
and get him up to recovery.

And good work, everybody.

Thank you all.

She keeps saying
talk to my wife.

Do you know what she means?

I might. Well?

But I'm not talking
about anything

I might have learned in a.A.
About someone...

Because I made a pledge there.

But someone else might know
what I can't talk about.

Is Pierce in a.A.?

No. No! So you should definitely
talk to her.

She'll just say
talk to my wife.

Then you should talk
to your wife.

[ Sighs ]

Meredith: Edwards, you ready?
Uh-huh.

[ Sighs ]

It's invading everything.

I'm literally peeling it
off the spleen.

And it's 7.8 pounds. Wow.

7.8 pounds of lousy parenting.

But she does have
a Dutch braid.

It's like a French one,
but only harder to do.

I used to do it for my sister
when my mom was strung out.

Took me an hour,
and it still fell apart.

Only a Saint or her mother

would take the time to do
something like this.

You need an extra set of hands?

No, we're good. Thanks. Metz?

Alex: She takes the time
to do her daughter's hair.

How the hell does she let her
develop an 8-pound tumor?

Well, you and I know something
about crazy mothers.

Be careful.

It's impinging
on the left hepatic vein.

I see it.

[ Heart monitor
beeping rapidly ]

Damn it.

Where are you?
Where are you? Got it!

Meredith: She's bleeding out
from her liver.

I'm packing,
but I can't control it.

More laps. Hang another unit of blood?
Right away.

Edwards, more suction.
I said clamp, now!

Another. Another.

One bullet went through the right
lower quadrant and perfed the colon.

A penetrating injury
to the liver here.

I need more laps!
She's crashing.

We got to stop this bleed.
Suction.

Alex: Come on. Come on!

Meredith:
Bulky 4-0 silk for ligation.

It's not working.
We're gonna lose her.

[ Heart monitor
beeping rapidly ]

What about a balloon tamponade?

What? A balloon tamponade.

That could control
a penetrating liver injury.

It should.

Yes. Get me a foley catheter.

You might need more --
more than one. I know.

Foley -- now. Let's go.

[ Heart monitor
beeping rapidly ]

You think that'll hold
the bleed?

It's the best chance we've got.

Bulky clamp.

[ Beeping continues ]

[ Sighs ]

Inflating the balloon.

[ High-pitched beeping ]

I'll be damned.

Nice work, Dr. Grey.

[ Applause ]

B.P.'S climbing.

[ Applause ]

Alex: That's amazing.

How the hell
did you think of that?

I don't know.

You okay?

She's fine. You saved her.
She's -- she's fine.

Yeah, I'm okay.

[ Heart monitor beeping ]

Ellis: There's never gonna be
a good time.

We just have to do it quickly,
rip off the bandage.

I'll tell Adele... tonight.

[ Chuckles ]

I'll tell Thatcher.

My heart's racing. We're
really gonna -- man: Dr. Grey?

[ Knock on door ] Dr. Grey?
Excuse me. One minute!

Yes, chief?

Sorry, Dr. Grey.

Um, I just received a very
interesting phone call.

Your lap method --
the one you just published.

The Grey method.

The Grey method, yes.

Um, it's just been placed
on the short list of nominations

for the Harper Avery award.

Are y-- it is? Are you kidding?

No surgical resident
has ever made that list before.

I only hope we can, uh,
convince you to stay in Seattle?

Well, that's very --
no, I know.

You'll have your veritable pick
after this.

Um, very well done, Grey.

Oh, the board would like
to see you to, uh --

of course.

Meredith.

Derek, not now.

Five minutes.
Just five minutes.

[ Sighs ]
Derek, I swear to God,

I can't do this right now.

I am sorry about the thing
I said about your mother.

Why? You meant it.

It was in the heat
of the moment. I-I just --

you know, you wanted to hurt me,
and you did that,

so at least have the guts
to stand by it.

Will you just hear me out?

You could do worse than compare
me to a brilliant surgeon,

but you meant it in the sense
that I am cold and ambitious

and selfish,
a horrible wife and mother.

I got that.

Well, I love how you just
switch it around

so you can make it fit --

you think I sound like
my mother? You do.

And now I get to live

under the weight
of your disappointment, too?

Because of something
you gave up.

If you recall,
I gave it up for you.

Oh, you gave it up for me,
but I don't want it.

Go. You should get
on the next flight out.

Call the president
and get the job back.

Just go.

[ Sighs heavily ]

Young Ellis: Blood.

It's just blood.

Meredith, don't be afraid.
Don't be afraid. [ Gasps ]

[ Body thuds ]

[ Dial tone ]

[ Dialing ]

[ Ringing ]

Operator: 911.
What's your emergency?

My mother
tried to kill herself.

[ Siren wailing ]

[ Indistinct talking ]

You're a very resourceful
little girl.

You know that?

You might have saved
your mother's life.

Someone from child protective
services come here yet?

He's right there.

You're still here.

Yes. Uh, I was just worried
about the little girl.

Is she okay?

She's gonna be fine.

Thank God.

Child protective services
is here for her, so...

Is that a Dutch braid?

When did she get sick --
your daughter?

When did this start?

I just want to see her.
Please --

no, you can't see her,
but you can come talk

to child protective services
with me.

No, I want to make sure
she's okay.

And they are going to call
the police.

No. No, you can't do that.

You don't understand.
We have no papers, undocumented.

That's no excuse
to abandon your kid.

They will take her from me.

I've seen it to people I know.

They go to sleep
in a surgical room,

they wake up in a plane
or in a different country.

It's called
medical repatriation,

and it's not something
that we do here.

I was afraid
to even bring her here.

You think I didn't want
to help her?

What are my choices?

They do the surgery.

Then they send us back
to a country where we starve

or -- or -- or I will work
as a prostitute, or even worse,

they'll make her a prostitute,

and no one says
anything about it.

That is one choice.

The other choice
is I ignore it and I pray

and I hope that she's okay

[voice breaking] And I hope that
whatever my little girl has

goes away.

And after a while,
these choices --

they make you crazy.

And after a while, I-I say
to myself that she's fine.

Then after a while,
I -- I don't see the tumor

when I look at her...

Because what is
the alternative?

[ Knock on door ]

Yep?

So, uh, you're leaving.

For sure?

[ Sighs ]

You should talk to your wife.

Oh, no, that's, uh --
that's not an option.

So, I'm asking you.

You know, I-it's not really
my place to say.

And, honestly,
I'm tired of saying it

'cause every time I do,
it just gets worse.

What? What gets worse?
What are you talking about?

She's my sister.

My parents, my birth parents...

Are Ellis Grey
and Richard Webber.

Your wife's my sister.
So you should talk to your wife.

That's --
so, Richard's your father.

Yes.

And Meredith is your sister.

Half-sister.

I thought
she would have told you.

Oh, no, no, we're not, um --

uh, Meredith is terrible
with sisters,

just so you know,
and, uh, I-I'm not.

I love sisters. I have
a bunch of them. And, um...

I'm glad you told me.
[ Laughs ]

It's nice to meet you.

[ Laughs ]

It's nice to meet you.

Oh!

This is very strange.

Yeah, I got to go.

Okay, don't leave -- okay? --
Until we talk again.

Just... don't leave.

[ Keyboard clacking ]

Okay, what is the deal
with you and Pierce?

Bailey, please.

See, every time I bring
her name up to you,

you look like I just stabbed you
in the chest.

Now, I think she's leaving
because of you.

All right, you don't want
to tell me what happened,

you don't have to, but...
Did something happen?

She's my daughter --

mine and Ellis Grey's.

[ Gasps ]

Oh, thank you, God.

What?! Oh, no, no!

I-I thought you had had sex
with that girl.

Bailey!

Wait. But that's why
she's leaving?

She doesn't want anything
to do with me.

Well, then, she doesn't know
you, or she would stay.

Now, you have to go talk
to her.

I think I'm too late.

No such thing.

I wish I could go back.

I'd do everything
so differently.

We would've had a wonderful life
together, Ellis.

You think so?

I do.

We would've done
our fellowship here,

and then you would've
fought me for chief

and probably won. [ Laughs ]

And... I wouldn't have minded

because we'd have
the kids at home.

We have kids?

Meredith would've needed
a brother and sister.

Kids need family.

I would be fine,
and we could grow old together.

[ Cries ]

My life is so unfinished.

It's unfinished,
and I'm not finished.

No. No, Ellis.

[ Cries ]

Don't think that.

Just close your eyes...

[ Cries ]

...and think of the family,

of the house...

And you there every night
to come home to.

[ Cries ]

And me there.

[ Sighs ]

I lied to you before...

About what happened that day
at the carousel.

I remember what she said.

I remember what I said.

I remember everything.

[ Sighs ]

It was a Thursday afternoon.

We had made a pact --

she would leave Thatcher,
and I would leave Adele.

Your mother had just received

her first
Harper Avery nomination.

She was so excited.

And I was... jealous.

Not like healthy competition.

A hateful, hopeless jealousy...

As if she was already
too far ahead to catch up to.

Her success illuminated
everything

I hadn't yet accomplished.

The night before, as I worked up
the nerve to tell Adele,

I thought of your mother.

I thought of what she could do
at such a young age.

I thought of what she would do.

And I thought...

"I will spend my life
feeling like this..."

"...my entire life."

So I ruined it.

[ Sighs ]

Young Richard:
You have a child.

Young Ellis: Don't say that.
I won't listen. Richard.

I'm sorry. I can't.

No, please, please,
please, please!

Ellis, no.

Richard, Richard,
you can't leave me.

Richard! Richard!

Richard!

[ Crying ]

Are you okay?

We have to go home.
We have to go home.

We have to go home.

And then she took me home.

Richard: Yes.

And then she attempted suicide.

[ Sighs ]

We would have had
a whole other life.

Everything after that
was my fault.

I made the wrong choice
for the wrong reason.

And there's hardly a day goes by
that I don't...

I'm so sorry.

I bet you are.

Ellis: He's gone back to Adele.

Yes. Of course he has.

Mom...

He's afraid --

afraid to be happy.

And I'm all alone.

Now I have to raise
my daughter alone.

[ Voice breaking ] How am I
expected to do that?

Alex: She's pretty skittish.
You're gonna need to...

Ana, we need to talk to you.

No. No, you said
we will be all right.

It's okay. You're safe. Calm down.
You can't take her from me.

I'm going. I'm go--
Nadia is safe.

I spoke to cps.

I told them the whole thing
was a huge misunderstanding

and that I made a mistake.

These people are lawyers
from the hospital,

and they are going to help you.

Ana, they're gonna work
with you, explain your rights,

help with the payment plan.

No one's gonna deny Nadia
medical treatment,

and no one's gonna
take her away,

but you have to bring her here
to me for her treatments.

Do you understand?

Okay, I'm going to
bring them in now.

Hi.

No, no, no,
I didn't vote for you.

Oh, like a month ago, you were
all, "tell me if you need help.

I will help you."
So full of crap.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

If you didn't want
to vote for me, fine,

but then why lie to my face
about it?

Because I didn't think
that you'd take

the attending job if you knew.

Look, if you're trying to be
a mentor or whatever,

right now you're sucking.

No, I'm not your mentor!

I-I mean,
I am if you need me to be,

but I need you
to not need me to be.

That's why
I didn't vote for you.

Listen, I spent the day

observing
a fetal shunt placement,

trying to suck up to a woman
who I'm 100% positive hates me.

The only reason
that I could even try to do that

is because you handled

that little girl's case
so beautifully.

I need to take a step back
from peds surgery

if I'm gonna make
this fellowship work...

And if I'm gonna keep
my marriage from falling apart.

And the only way that I can even
try to do that

is if -- is if you're here,

doing everything
that I can't do.

I don't need you to be
my fellow anymore, Alex.

I need you to be me.

You're the only one I can trust
to do that.

I should be making
a lot more money.

A lot. A lot.

Derek: Ah, no, stop. Stop.

We're not fighting.
The fighting is over.

I am calling a halt to it.

God, Derek,
you don't just get to do that,

decide when we're moving,
decide when a fight is over.

What if I'm not done fighting?

Oh, it's -- it's not over.
I can guarantee you that.

We'll probably fight tomorrow
and the next day,

and this is gonna last
for a while,

but right now
we're gonna have a truce.

A truce? Yes.

Why?

You have a sister.

You're losing her, Meredith,
and you shouldn't.

You have a sister
and you don't tell me?

This can't happen.

When stuff like this comes up,
you have to let me know.

I -- we put all our other stuff
aside, and it's like I --

I need to know
that you're okay.

Are you?

Are you okay?

Young Ellis: We have to go home.
[ Baby crying ]

Woman:
Would you like to hold her?

No. Absolutely not. No.
Don't be afraid.

Richard and Ellis had a kid.

[ Sighs ]

I remember moving to Boston.

I remember the two of us

basically hiding out
in an apartment.

And I remember she cried a lot.

And I remember
her belly getting big.

And I knew I wasn't supposed to
make any noise.

And then her water broke
on the kitchen floor,

and that scared me
because it reminded me

of the blood in the kitchen
when she cut her wrists.

And I went to the hospital.

I was there... [ baby crying ]

...both times.

And I heard a baby cry,
and I heard my mother cry.

And then we went home.

And her belly
wasn't big anymore.

And then we moved across town
to a house, a really nice house.

And then she started
her fellowship at mass gen,

and I just started first grade.

And then she was just
Dr. Ellis Grey

and I was just a kid in school

and everything
went back to normal.

I mean, I was 5 years old.

What -- what was
the alternative?

And I have a sister.

She's nice. Good doctor.

You remind me of my daughter.

[ Indistinct conversations ]

Pierce.

Do you have a second?

Yeah. Listen --

you didn't ask for a sister,
and you probably don't need one.

Your parents send you
singing fish.

You're very accomplished
for your age,

and you seem very happy.

So, you can go if you want.

I can understand
why you would want to.

But I would like to show you
something if you have a minute.

They say we can repress
our memories.

I wonder if we're just keeping
them safe somewhere...

[ Sighs ]

She wrote in these journals,
obsessively...

Mostly surgical notes, ideas,

but this one is from around
the time you were born.

"A surgery can fail
for any number of reasons,

"whether from
a patient's morbidity

or surgeon's ineptitude."

Geez.

They're not so warm.

[ Scoffs ] She wasn't, either.

But there is more to her
than...

I'm still finding out things
about her myself.

...because no matter
how painful they are,

they are our most valuable
possessions.

Ellis: Our lives are built
on our mistakes

as much as our successes.

She wrote mostly at night,

with a glass of wine,
as you can see by the...

Ring stains and --

but I think here
is when she found out

she was pregnant
because the wine stains stop

and she starts writing down
everything she ate.

So... this was when she...

Realized she was pregnant
with you.

So she wanted you to be okay.

She wanted to be healthy.

She tried, at least.

They made us who we are.

[ Elevator bell dings ]

Ellis: The first time I won
the Harper Avery,

I dedicated it to the men
who'd been so supportive.

[ Laughter, applause ]

[ Chuckles ]
No, I wish. Just kidding.

The first time I won
the Harper Avery,

I thought,
"screw all those boys."

[ Light laughter ]

I stood there,
holding that trophy,

and I thought about
everything I'd sacrificed,

what I had overcome.

And I dedicated that award

to all the women surgeons
who would come after me.

[ Applause ]

[ Chuckles ]

Where were we?