Gossip Girl (2007–2012): Season 1, Episode 14 - The Blair Bitch Project - full transcript

Spring Break is over, and so are all of Blair's days of hiding away. Finally, after three weeks, she comes back to school, with an unpleasant welcome by Jenny and the "in" crowd, who throw ice cream in her hair. Serena believes that being mean was got Blair kicked out of the "in" crowd in the first place and dethroned "Queen Bee." When Jenny asks Blair to meet her at Butter along with all of Blair's former friends, Serena finds it the perfect opportunity for Blair to show just how nice she is. But the situation goes from nice to sour when Jenny and her friends purposely don't show up, leaving Blair all alone. Meanwhile, Jenny needs something to wear for her 15th birthday party, and eventually ends up stealing one of her friend's mother's dresses in exchange for a $1,200 dress in an exchange shop. But when Jenny tries to get it back, she learns the red dress is over $8,000. Once again, Jenny steals the red dress, throwing her coat over the dress. She comes home to a 15th birthday party created by none other than Blair, who talked to Jenny's dad, and made the birthday party as lame as possible. While Jenny's dad doesn't realize how lame the party is, Jenny's friends do, and are about to leave when they find Jenny wearing the red dress. They ditch the birthday party and meet Blair at Butter. Thinking quickly, Jenny sneaks out and has Nate accompany her to Butter. Jenny's friends are pleased that Nate, who they are attracted to, is hanging out with them, and "forget" the incident with the dress, leaving Blair friendless once again. Also, Serena adjusts to her new living conditions with Chuck, but when she receives inappropriate gifts, she believes Chuck sent them. But, at the very end of the episode, she learns who really sent them, and it wasn't Chuck.

Gossip girl here,your one and only source

Into the scandalous lives manhattan's

I love you,Nate Archibald.

-always have,always will. - I love you,too.

- What is wrong with you?This is not who you are - I know who Blair and those girls are,

But I know who I am ,and I'm not gonna forget that just hang out with them

We are not supposed to talk,remember?

I can't help myself. I never should have let you,let me go.

I will not base my personal life on your preferences.

Dan is my boyfriend.

I Would rather be chuck's stepsister than dan's.



Lily,would you do me the honor of being my wife?

He proposed before we left,and I'm going to say yes.

Take care,Rufus.

How glad are you see our families merge,sis?

So glad that if you ever call me that again,

It'll be the last thing you ever say,Chuck

unless you want Ar nathaniel to know how you lost your virginity to me

In the back of a moving vehicle,

- I encourage patienced restraint. - Isn't there someone else that you can torture?

Ok,I know you're friends with Blair,

- But if you know something... - well,Blair is never really my friend.

- ...so, - So..yeah,there's something you should know.

- What a bitch. - Oh,my god. She is such a slut!

- I made a decision I was no condition to me - There is nothing to do with you,Blair.



It's over.

You held a certain fascination

When you were beautiful and untouched

I don't want you anymore,

- And I can't see why anyone else would. - What are you doing here?

- I was just leaving. - No,stay.

Consider yourself dethroned,queen b.

Jenny,if you walk away from me now I will ruin you.

How are you gonna do that?

- My whole life falling in part - stay and fight.

- We'll get through this together. - You promise?

Promise.

And who am I?

That's a secret i'll never tell.

You know you love me.

X.o.x.o.,gossip girl.

Cat?

Cat!

Cat!

Ew.

Cat!

Cat.

You don't have a cat,Jenny.

My name is blair.

You don't have anyone.

But I'm Blair.

I'm Blair!

Miss. Blair. Miss. Blair.

. Blair.

Wakey,wakey,upper east siders.

Spring break is done,and I'm starved for the dish.

Were you sunning in capri or sinning in croatia?

Give me the deets.

Oh,what's happening?

You have bad dream,

And you're sleeping with your chocolates.

Oh,lady godiva,my only friend.

And has anyone spotted our ex-queen b.?

Where does the dethroned royalty

Vacation these days?

Club bed is over. First day back to school.

I can't,Dorota. I don't fell very well.

Serena come to get you soon.

Call her and cancel.

And cover my mirrors.

Let me in the morning from my former life.

Chuck,I'm serious!

Are you done yet?This is my bathroom!

It's late,

And not to mention disgusting.

Chuck!

What are you doing?

All right,ladies. My sister needs to shower.

Make room.

I'm just messoning with you.

- Can't believe you lit up my bathroom. - Well,if I lit up in mine,

In the folks would know it was me,sis.

Oh,okay. Let's get one thing straight

Our parents maybe insisting on blending our households,

But i am not your sister.

I do not share any of your DNA

Nor do i ever wish to.

Then I suggest you get a new hand towels.

Okay.

It's imperative that I bathe.

Can you just get out?

You know what? Fine. Just forget it.

Next year,we're doing spring break in Maldives.

- Skiing is too dangerous. - You broke your arm in the spa.

Oh,here,Hazel. Thanks for letting me borrow it.

- What is this? - The bracelet you lent me in aspen

Oh,yeah. You know you could've just kept it,

And I would've forgot i had it.

Girls,how excited are we?

Party tomorrow night for jenny at socialist !

It's gonna be my best birthday ever.

I heard the mojitos are amazing.

- Untill you get your moutharound a mini... - oh,I don't,um

It's a sandwich

Oh. Wardrobe,ladies?

Ferragamo clutch(TBD)

And whatever dress i buy today go with

Oh,what about you J?

-I've got some dresses on hold at bendels - There is an a.t.m.,Jenny

you said you want to hit it

You know,to pay penelope back for brunch?

Oh,uh,yeah. $120,right?

Ah,I don't feel like stopping.

You can get the next one.

What are you doing?

I'm hiding from my valet.

He wanted to put my socks on for me this morning.

- Our servantse very attention - new latvian maid.

No. No,no,no,he should not meet brigita. He's 14.

- Avoid this person. - May I remind you,Serena,

- That you used to have a sense of humor? - No.

- Morning,father. - Hey.

- Morning,kids. - Morning.

-And how is Lily von bulow today? - Oh,I have a headache.

I haad a very frustrating conversation

Th the wedding planner this morning.

Oh,may I say aggravation becomes you?

You may,but I won't believe it.

So... First day back at school,huh?

Honey,you didn't,uh,want to shower?

I have to go meet Blair. Eric?

Go ahead. He'll take the limo.

As my best man,

I expect you to keep things smooth until the wedding.

Best man?

Uh,um,I'd be honored,sir.

To family.

I came straight from the airport

Take Jenny to school,and she's already gone?

- She slept at Hazel's last night. - Oh. Who's,uh,who's Hazel?

Her new friend,

The girl whose family she went with to Aspen.

Yeah,I was actually surprised you let her go

- and cancel on mom like that - Your mom was completely support of it.

Jenny was very well taken care of.

Spoke to her every day, twice from the private plane. - Private plane?

It's the best early birthday present

We could have given her. Oh, so you paid for it?

Well, I gave her pocket money.

Yeah, Jenny's happier than she's been in a long time

Hey, whenever you're done

with that "i'd doing things differently" look, two things...

One, I can't seem to nail Jenny down

on what she wants to do for actual birthday. - I'll get it out of her.

Good. And, uh, two--

What the hell are you still doing here?

Mm. Thank you.

At least you get to wake up from your nightmare.

I'm living with mine.

And the god I have plans with Dan tonight.

Finally,the return of some normalcy!

B, what are you doing?

Giving homeschooling some serious consideration.

Look, I know you think

Everyone's still talking about you,

But your 3-week-old-scandal is ancient news.

Did you even hear the dirt happened - Who should I heard it from? Dorota?

Well, after much concerted effort,

Ya finally made it into brody jenner's cell phone.

Ugh.

and Kati's dad

moved her entire family back to Israel. Yeah.

And cotatance's bad-girl-turned-good...

ERMAN ACCENT) Serena Van Der Woodsen...

Moved in with Chuck Bass.

Yeah. So you're thinking

Is whole thing could have blown over by now?

Come on.

That, too.

Don't worry, B

The French revolution had cake.

Come on. Let's go.

The American revolution had tea.

But looks like the overthrow of Blair Waldorf,

Well...

Who said you need a silver spoon

to dole out just desserts?

Hey, Jenny.

Can i talk to you just for a second?

I'll meet you guys, okay?

Hey, so I may have told Blair

you told me the truth about heanand Chuck

And I'm sure she didn't react well to that.

But you don't know what you're dealing with here.

- I'm not scared of Blair - No, I'm not talking about...

I'm talking about...talking about your new circle.

I mean, they've been friends with Blair forever,

and look what they're doing to her.

When you fall out of line,

what do you think this gonna happen to you?

I won't fall out of line.

I'm not saying you're gonna...

It's just...

You're not like those girls, Jenny.

That's weird, Nate. Since they're my friends, you think we have some stuff in common

Okay.

Well, I will give you this...

You've got good name

Ok, I know this is hard for you B

But you can't let them beat you.

You're Blair Waldorf, remember?

Right. These are my steps,

and i'm not gonna relinquish them

without a fight, though it would be helpful

maybe there was one more person in our crowd.

Only old people and children and...

Ugh, there's Chuck

and a blond mini-Chuck.

He's trying to torture me.
220

- ...I can't believe it. - I know.

Does little J. actually think

she's anything but their lackey?

Hey.

Hi.

So since when does nate archibald have

much to say to Jenny humphrey, huh?

Why? You guys don't like him?

Penelope's only had a historic crush on him

since the 20th century.

Since you and Nate are so tight,

- Maybe you can broke that. - Yeah. Maybe.

- They what? - They're taking her out to dinner

for her birthday tomorrow night

Table service at Socialista.

So Jenny Humphrey is officially being inscribed on the a-list.

- Wait. How do you know this? - Because they invited me,

But I said no out of deference to you.

I just thought I could have dinner

with her and dan and the whole family.

How do you mean she get out of skate

Beause I'm nice. You should try it sometime.

Come on. Um,compliment me. Tell me my hair looks beautiful.

But your hair looks disgusting. Did you even shower?

B, I say this out of love,

But your being a bitch

Which got dairy in your hair in the first place, okay?

Be nice and neutral, and things will swing back to normal.

You're the queen B, so just let nature take its course.

I'm going to Model UN, but we're dining tonight,right?

Butter,7:00, um, I don't know if i can go out again tonight.

Why? What are you doing? Do we have a reservation?

Yeah, I mean doesn't it take like 2 weeks to get a table there

Ke,2 weeks get a table there? Not if they slipped me $100

Oh, and don't forget, J

You owe me.

Um...

You know, I've got a better idea.

What's she doing?

What does she think she's doing?

She's giving you the perfect opportunity for niceness.

- Come on. - No.

Yes

Serena, I know that you're doing something with Dan tonight

But, Blair, um, we're all going to butter,

and I was wondering if you wanted to join us? - She'd be delighted, yes, Butter!

Great.

Great!

Very nice.

Thank you.

#Who's there for you when you're call and alone?#

#The teenagers, teenagers#

well, are you always looked this good?

You look so good to me.

You look so good to me,

and you smell... Mmm,so clean.

Mm,you're not gonna tell me the Chuck shower story again,

- Are you? - No.

Good.
279

Dan.

Chuck, how are you?

Excellent. Enjoying having family around.

Can you just get it over with, Chuck?

Say whatever pervy thing you're gonna say and just leave?

The wedding caterer

is presenting a tasting to the family.

I was coming call you to dinner. - Okay,I'll take off then.

No need.

Already asked the staff to set a place for you.

I have to say I prefer the chestnut pappardelle.

Yeah,the foie gras is a bit rich.

U know, I'm, I'm, umm, slanting heavily towards

The venison fellow. It's fallow

Fallow. Fallow,exactly. Fallow

Oh,for me?

Thank you

Who's it from? I don't know...

but it says "open immediately"

I have to refrigerate it?It's not for me,I don't know

Oh,don't put your dirty package on the table

I had a dime for every time I heard that

That's enough,Chuck

Porn and handcuffs?

Really?

Oh,my. Woo

This is low,Chuck,enen for you

What? I didn't send this

Excuse me.

Uh,could you...

Oh,yeah. My pleasure. Uh,it's not--that's not what I--

I didn't mean that

It's,uh...

It's trash. I'll throw it out

Spotted--blair waldorf,alone at Butter

I'm sorry,miss

But--it looks like your friends aren't coming

Humiliated--party of one

Can't you just picture her sitting there?

Every time memeone comes in the door...

"Ah... It's not them. Oh,no,not them."

Not going to the Butter

is so much better than going to the Butter

My new nanette lepore for jenny's birthday

Gorgeous

Wow

Right?

What's the birthday girl wearing?

Oh,I'm still deciding between two dresses at bergdorf's

I thought you said bendel's

Bendel's. Right.

Oh,it's my dad.

Is there you wearing your black shello?

Which one? You know,I never wear the same thing twice

Mommy taught me well. Hey,dad

You missed dinner,kiddo. Oh,yeah,um,I'm studying at hazel's

And I guessed I lost track of time. Um,I'm not mad

I just feel like I haven't seen you in a while

We haven't even discussed your birthday. I was gonna do something with my friends...

Oh. That's great,honey

But since I have nothing to wear

I don't think that's happening anymore

Well,if you want to be with your friends

We can do the family thing over the weekend

Sweetheart?

Uh,yeah. I'll be home soon,dad

Okay. Bye

Hello? Hi

Oh,no check,honey. The drink's on us,

Unless you want something else?

Yes.

Another bellini,

This seared squab

And a bus person of separated tables

Please

One may be the loneliest number...

Information. What city and state,please?

Brooklyn. I think that's in New York

But sometimes only the lonely can play

Wake up,little Jenny. The bitch is back

I thought you said you didn't have anything else

Well,I found some stuff in the back of my closet

hmm. Do you want to go with cash again

Or do you want to buy your sewing machine back?

Neither. I want that dress

Honey,this is $1,200

Um,this one's... quite lovely

Ah,well,that's more my color

I'd say we take the jet to croatia

Where young Eric here

can exploit the lesser age of consent

Am I invited to the Bachelor party? Brother,please

Then head west to monte carlo

For some all-night cards at metropole

And swing by giza

Just to watch the sun come up over the Pyramids

What do you think,father? I think we're here

Uh,see you at home,Bart

Chuck will catch up in a minute

You almost ruined things between me and Lily once before

I'm not gonna let that happen again

What are you talking about? I'm talking about the focus stunt you pulled at dinner

I didn't send Serena that package

And quite frankly

Her violated virgin Mary act is getting pretty old

I thought making you my best man would help

What is that supposed to mean?

Inspire you to valuey y happiness

Over your own childish agenda

Things seem to be working out for you at that club Victrola

I'm thinking you might like me to invest more in the place

So you can have more control?

In exchange for good behavior,of course.

You're bribing me?

So we have a deal then?

Hey,why aren't you school? I'm taking the morning off

Volunteering to help those less fortunate than myself.

Wow. You're in a good mood.

Butter with the girls must have gone well last night?

I didn't go,actuall

why not? I think she should work a little harder for my forgiveness

Hey,Dan's not hanging out in brooklyn again this morning

He's with you at school,right? No,not yet,but he'll be here soon. Why?

Just tell him I say hi

Okay

Hi

Jenny's dad?

We met briefly at thanksgiving

Ah,yeah...

Hi

Got three cases of champagne for Serena van der woodsen

No,no. I'm Serena van der woodsen

But those aren't mine

Well,the purchase order never lies. Salud

Hey,guys,I just got this incredible dolce

You wanna see? It's unbelievable

You can't turn your back in your own house.What are you guys talking about?

My mother's vavalentino was stolen. Oh,my god

It was made especially for her

It was the same year he did,uh

Jackie o.'S lace wedding mini

Well,did someone break in? No,and the maid swore to the police

That she didn't take it,but she'll probably get fired.Wait,police for a dress?

It's worthy $15,000. My mother told the maid if she returned it

She could work something out. Like she'll bring it back

Well,you never know. I mean,it could turn up

Right,cause really,where is she gonna wear it?

I'm really glad,because when I spoke to her

She mentioned the plans with the girls falling through

Nope. Tell you the truth,I didn't really believe her. why?

I thought she was just conflicted

About choosing friends over family

Well,you know that's the biggest struggle

With a girl of her age. Memory doesn't serve...

Trying to reconcile who you're becoming

With who you used to be

She's been running herself ragged,Mr Humphrey

Swedling two worlds?Well,I know she was running herself ragged

Trying to get into one of those worlds

Picking up dry cleaning,gowns for masked balls...

Well,it's no easier once you're in.

She needs some relief.

Well,then that's what she'll get.

Whatever I can do to help.

Oh,thank god.

Betty? Hi. Excuse me. Um...

Would you pardon me for a moment,please??

I need to trade back

All right,you can keep the scarf and the shoes,

- I'm sorry,but that's just not gonna be possible. - what? Why?

You know,when you leave here with an item,

You're agreeing to its value.

The dolce sold at $1,200.

The valentino... Is seven times that.

Please look,this has sentimental value,

- And I didn't realize - no,I'm sorry.

A couple of hours ago,this dress was mine,all right?

Doesn't even have tags on it yet.

Look,it's not my fault

That you don't know what a valentino's worth.

Hello? Nate,it's Jenny.

- What's going on? - Listen,I wouldn't be calling you

I have anyone else to turn to,

But I made a mistake,and I need to fix it,

- And I really need borrow some money.I - Jenny,just slow down.

- I promise I'll pay you back. - Is everything okay?

- Ah,I just--I madea mistake,and I need to fix it. - well,how much?

$8,000.

$8,000? Jenny,what do you need that kind of money for?

You know what? Forget it. I'm sorry I bothered you.

The price of fitting in

Might have gotten a little steeper...

But little J. Still knows

It's what's underneath that counts.

Well,we could put this one on a mylar tablecloth

And pretend it's a bar mitzvah.

Oh,there you are. I have a date with Dan.

Could you excuse us?

You're gonna say something worse than the bar mitzvah remark?

Serena,I think we should talk about any feelings

You might be having about my upcoming marriage.

Ay,but you're asking me this now because...

Cause I got a call from your headmistress

Who said that there was something

About a case of alcohol?

Well,I thought you may be acting out.

Great,mom. I actually woke up this morning,and I thought,

Mm. I'm a little uncertain about my mother's wedding.

"why don't I invite the entire junior class

Out to the courtyard for a champagne toast. - You have whole things like this before.

Obviously,Chuck's master plan is working.

Can't believe you think Chuck is doing these things.

Looking good to everyone in my life isn't enough for him.

He has to make me look bad or crazy..

Well,Chuck may be eccentric,but I doubt he's diabolical.

What's he done now?

I'll tell you what he's done.

Surprise!

Wow.

Happy birthday,Jenny.

Um,dad,I ca--I can't believe you did all this.

And,uh,Blair's here.

Um,this is so great

That all of you are here

In my house.

I should go change.

- Uh,you got it? - Okay.

Don'think she was surprised.

- What's Blair doing here? - I don't know.

- This party's kind of weird. - Weird? It's time for its induction

To the birthday hall of lame.

So not what I pictured

the guy on the phone about the loft party. - Can't believe we gave up our table for this.

Mint mojitos at socialista,

Mint milanos with Jenny's dad.

He's kind of a hottie.

Yeah,a hottie dad.

How long do we have to stay?

Rice krispie treats?

- You can't believe how mad Bart was. - Yes,I can,

'Cause you've told me about three times.

Wonder what they're gonna do to him.

- I wish I could see his face. - Hey,you know what? I've got some stories,too,

Uh,about seeing my mother

For the first time since she left at christmas.

- I'm the worst girlfriend. - No,you're not.you're not.

And there's the funny visit to my grandma

At the old folks' home--

- Two women,a sponge bath and a bedpan. - I'm sorry,you're right.

I wanna be here right now with you.

- And--and Nate. - What?

Hey,guys.

- hey - hey

Sorry to interrupt. Your mom told me you guys were here.

Can I speak with you for one second,Dan?

Uh,yeah.Yeah,sure.

All right. Okay.

So have you spoken with your sister at all today?

- no. Why? What's wrong? - I don't know she just called me.

She was really freaked out,didn't know where to turn.

- She asked to borrow $8,000. - What? Why?

Yeah,I don't know. I tried to get her

Tell me what was going on,but she wouldn't say anything.

Please? Dad,just get out,okay I need to change!

- Honey,can't you tell me what's going on? - nothing,just leave!

- Are you crying? Are you upset about the party? - No,can we talk about this later,okay?

Really just need to get out of this dress.

Uhh,it's stuck!

Okay,all right.

Just help me,okay? Help me get it off.

- Honey,you have to calm down. - No,hurry up.

- Did you get it? - I need a pair of pliers.

Dad...

Sorry. Sorry. We were just looking for our wraps.

I'll get them.

Oh,my god.

That's my mother's dress.

No,you guys,I got this--at resurrection.

Remember,I was telling you

- About the really great dress I bought? - Her mother's one-of-a-kind valentino

That just happened to disappear from her closet. - She must have given it away, forgotten or something.

Are you calling my daughter a thief?

Well-- excuse me.

This feels private,so I'm gonna head out now.

I have a table at butter.

Reservation's under Waldorf,in case there's an after party.

Spotted-- Jenny in a red dress

With the red hands to match.

Looks like other disgrace is the name on the label.

Blair said they told you

The original party had fallen through

That they could surprise you with a better one.

Blair's a liar. You got played.

She also said that you were afraid

The girls wouldn't accept everything about you.

She knew you were wrong. She wanted you to feel like you had nothing to be ashamed of.

Was that a lie,too?

Where did you get the dress?

And I know you didn't make it,

Cause your sewing machine is gone.

You have no idea how hard it is,dad.

I sold my sewing machine,okay?

- What? - Ah,and a lamp and some jewelry.

Why?

Because i had to.

Dad,did you think that you can just send me off to school

Th a plaid skirt and a metrocard,

And everything will be okay. I am not apologizing

For not having a private plane for you,jenny.

U think i'm ashamed of where i come from?

No,dad,what i a ashamed of

Having to bring a brown-bag lunch to school,

D,you know,eat it in the bathroom,

And then go out with my friends

And pretend that i'm not hungry

When i go to lunch with them.

U don't have to do those things,jenny.

You're making a choice.

Why don't you get?

Do you want me to choose to have no friends?

Look,clearly,

I mean,that's not even a choice anymore,

Because that's just done.

I should probably get back.

Well,thank you for staying with me

- while i hid out from my house of horrors. - Oh,no problem.

,do you think jennyll be all right? Yeah,dan's a good guy.

He'll take care of her.

U are,too,you know,a good guy--

A forgiving guy

Who can't pit himself against blair forever.

good night.i'm sorry you gave me an opening.

Couldn't resist. I'm just saying.

- How are you doing,man? - Night.

- Hey. - Hey.

- Where have you been? - Therapy.

For four hours?,well,before i was--i was playing wii tennis with chuck

At this guy named brantfthth's house?

why are you hanging out with him?

Brantforth?

Chuck is fun,okay?

He's cool to me,and he doesn't treat me like some freak

- At just out the ostroff center. - Who treats you like that?

guys at st. Jude's,the girls at constance,

- A at the korean deli on 75TH street. - Eric...

And he's not--he's not always caref a around me,

Like--like one bad thing,and i'll break or something.

Besides,i always wanted a brother.

I'm trying it out,you know? Here.

what's this? chuck said it came for you this morning.

Thought you might want to open it out of the house,

Just in case.why didn't he bring it to me himself?

Cause he thought you wanted him to stay away from you.

Whoa. Is that coke?

How do you like a brother who use you as a drug mule?

Serena,i.

Hey. Who turned 12?

Oh,please don't rub it in.

Dad,what happened?

Hey.

You okay?

You wanna tell me why you needed to borrow $8,000?

Not really.

H,i can't believe nate told you.

Well,he was worried about you,

At you might be turning into some hideous upper et t cyborg.

He said that?

No. No,i did.

Just got in way over my head.

U know,i thought i could trade the dress

wear it that night and return it,

But just...

Look,uh...

It's your birthday,

I think we should get some ice cream,

And we can talk about all this stuff later,okay?

Okay.

I'll just let dad know what we're gonna do.

Jen,ouou--you have so much more to offer

Than the things that those girls have,really.

You've got so much more to bring to the table.

You just need to find a way to believe that.

What the hell is your problem?

Specify the context.

You disgust me,chuck.

How dare you involve eric in something like this?

No wonder you're friendless and girlfriendless.

- En your own father expects the worst from you - well,you saw to that.

Listen,if we're gonna exist under the same roof,

- I am laying down some house rules - no need,princes bart already kicked me out.

What?

I'm moving back to my suite.

Bart thought it would be best for family be that way for a while

There's a line outside.

U ready to give up you're table yet?

No. My party's coming.

They're coming!

These seats taken?

Any good general knows

U never let your soldiers see you sweat.

Look's like this battle's ending at butter,

And the win belongs to b.

Victory is sweet.

i don't want jenny leave this house, ok?

I-i know,dad,but is,s,you know,it's her birthday,

- and i kind of promised. - well,since when you do the decisions around here

- she'll just ha t to take thatth a gr - i'm sorry so what are you gonna do?

Are you just gonna keep her locked up?

I don't know.

last week,aspen. This week,prison?

Yeah,well,spring break is over for everyone,

Including myself

Really took my eyes off the ball.

so...so what do you want to do?

Why don't we just celebrate 15

with some jenny cake in the kitchen?

Ay. All right. I'll go tell her.

So,jen

She's gone.

What?

She's not in there. She's gone.

hey

Uh,i'm sorry for calling you like that earlier.

i'm so embarrassed.

Anan,it was stupid and--and inappropriate--

No,no,no,no. Listen,i'm just glad you're okay.

Yeah.

Um,okay,well,i do have a favor to ask you.

I mean,it's not money,

But i just really don't want to be alone on my birthday.

Oh,for me? Thank you.

Oh,my god.

What's wrong?

Nothing.

I'll be back.

Excuse me.

Cuse me!

I'm going to the bar.

What?

Bar!

We'll be right back.

Where are all the hot guys?

i don't know.

- they don't exactly serve tea and cupcake - 20 minutes.

Is this really happening?

Penepepe,you know nate,right?

Of course. Hi.

Hi. Uh,how are you? good to see you again

HE kills' "sour cherry" PLAYING)

Hazel,i think maybe your mom

give away that valentino.

Yeah,she is always cleaning out her closet,

And that ativancan really play with her memory

Hey.

I'm really sorry,chuck.

i Know it wasn't you who sent me that stuff.

Never thought i'd say this,

T it turns out chuck bass is innocent.

Who did send s. All those naughty gifts?

Why don't i make you a drink?