Good Times (1974–1979): Season 6, Episode 11 - The Snow Storm - full transcript

♪ Good times ♪

♪ Anytime you meet a payment ♪

♪ Good times ♪
♪ Anytime you need a friend ♪

♪ Good times ♪ ♪ Anytime
you're out from under ♪

♪ Not gettin' hassled
Not gettin' hustled ♪

♪ Keepin' your
head above water ♪

♪ Makin' a wave when you can ♪

♪ Temporary layoffs ♪
♪ Good times ♪

♪ Easy credit rip-offs ♪
♪ Good times ♪

♪ Scratchin' and survivin' ♪
♪ Good times ♪

♪ Hangin' in a chow line ♪
♪ Good times ♪



♪ Ain't we lucky we got 'em ♪

♪ Good times ♪♪

Yeah. I'm glad we're
finished with that.

Finally got the storm
windows in place, Michael.

Yeah. Man, would you look at that
snow out there? It's like a miracle.

Now, what's so miraculous
about a snowstorm?

Overnight, the neighborhood
has gone lily-white.

- Coffee's ready.
- [Thelma] Good morning, everybody.

[Florida] Good morning.
Good morning, husband.

It's "kiss and hug"
time. Mm-hmm.

When isn't it?

Thank you, bro. Hey,
Michael, that's my doughnut.

Naw. Possession is
nine-tenths of the law.

Keith, when is a dumb,
old doughnut more



important than a kiss
and hug from your wife?

Baby, you know you don't take no
backseat to a lousy jelly doughnut.

Why, I'd give my life for
you. But we talkin' custard.

Oh, Keith! Just jivin', baby.

Whoo! Give me some coffee!

I gotta warm up my bones.

Well, I'm so glad
it's just your bones,

because Brazil does not make
enough coffee to warm the rest of you.

Oh. I tell you. Bookman,
the abominable snowman.

Bookman, why are you here?

I don't think you heard me.

Bookman, why are ya here?

Hey, what's the matter?
You got Twinkies in your ears?

Good coffee.

[Keith] The man is
wearing earmuffs.

Oh, good. Then we
can insult him all day.

Thelma, it ain't no good insultin'
Bookman if he can't hear you.

Bookman, when are you gonna
clear the snow off the sidewalk?

Listen, I got a plan.

I got something that will
clean all the snow off...

and make the sidewalks
as clean as a whistle.

What's it called? August?

No. You see, I put this sign out in
the entrance... the door entrance...

And it says... Yeah?

"Lost on the front step:
five-carat diamond ring."

Then watch the people
start shovelin' that snow.

[Phone Ringing]
Answer the phone.

Yes, sir. I'll get
it, Mrs. Evans.

Bookman!

Hello? Yes, this
is Mrs. Bookman.

This is Mrs. Evans.

Good morning, Mr. Collingswood.

Why, yes, of course.

I'll be there in 15
minutes. Mm-hmm.

Thelma, I won't eat breakfast. I'll get
a cup of coffee down at the bus yard.

Mama, you're not gonna
go to work today, are you?

Listen, half of the regular
drivers are out with colds,

so they want all the
substitute drivers they can get.

Ma, why don't you tell 'em
you have a cold too? Yeah.

Now, you know I
can't do that, Thelma.

The kids I drive to school need
all the education they can get,

and it's my job
to get them there.

Mama, I heard on the radio that
they might be closing the schools down.

You tell Mr. Collingswood that.

Whoo-whee, child!
Close the door.

Ooh, child, let me
tell you somethin'.

When all our ancestors was down
there in the hot, sunny southland,

liftin' those barges
and totin' those bales,

little did they know that 200
years later some of their kinfolk...

would be freezin' their
ex-cotton-pickin' tails off in a project.

And I said all that to say this,
honey: Whoo, child, it's cold outside.

- Hi, Ms. Woods.
- Oh, you just the one
I want to see.

I got a bone to pick with you.

I asked you to fix my thermostat,
and you knocked it off the wall.

Of all the ham-handed,
oatmeal-brained, fumble-fingered,

stumble-footed goofballs I have
ever known, you are the worst.

You are a buffalo-butted,

banjo-behind reject
from the school of losers.

You are a disgrace to the human
race and the animal kingdom included.

I have no idea why Noah
let you on his ark, honey,

because I don't know where they'd
fit the elephant butt you got in there.

♪ Sleigh bells ring ♪
You are so ridiculous.

♪ Are you listening ♪
You knock-kneed, big-head...

♪ Snow is... ♪♪ Get
out of my face, you fat...

I was just getting
ready to insult him.

Flo, Penny is bent on
going to school today.

You planning on driving the bus?
Sure. Aren't you going to work?

I've got to go to the boutique. But I
don't know who's gonna do any shopping.

I don't know many
Eskimos with credit cards.

Let's go. I feel like
King Tut in a sauna.

Ma, I wish you would
change your mind.

Thelma, you know I'm not gonna
let a little bit of snow scare me.

It never did when you all were
little, and it sure won't start now.

Yeah. I know those kids will
appreciate it as much as we did.

[Chuckles]

Wise guy. [Thelma]
Have a nice day, y'all.

Michael, Thelma, did you hear
that jive radio announcer in there?

- No, man, what'd he say?
- He said...

[Gravelly Voice] "Hey, all you
sleek and slinky music freaks,

this is Bear Cat Bill, your very
own disco dude, rappin' to you."

[Laughing] "Man, it's so
cold outside. How cold is it?

"Man, it's so cold
outside even the flashers

are just showin'
pictures of themselves.

"And, man, the
snow is gettin' heavy.

"So just lay back in your sack, and if
you want some real delicious fatback,

"save your mama
for better things.

"Call Harry's Pick-A-Rib.
Guaranteed not to leave a grease ring.

Your mama will thank you."

Hey, I was just trying
to cheer you all up.

Well, it's not working,
'cause I'm still

worried about Ma driving
that bus in that snow.

It's not that bad out
there. Besides, your

mother can handle
herself in any emergency.

Yeah, but it seems like
there's something we can do.

[Chuckles] I was
just thinkin' of that.

But seeing that we're
stuck with Michael,

I think we better do something
that includes the three of us.

Hmm. Oh, well.
How about charades?

Hmm. I'm sure glad you
didn't say hide-and-go-seek.

'Cause knowin' the two of y'all, you
sure enough wouldn't come lookin' for me.

Oh, yeah? You watch your
mouth! Come on. Hit me!

[Wind Howling]

[Grunts]

Alex. Come on.
Give me a hand here.

What's up?

Ooh!

Everybody okay?
Kim, Alex, Penny?

I guess so.

This place is scary.

We're gonna die of scariness!

Now, now, now. Nobody's gonna
die of anything. I guarantee you that.

What if you die first?

Nothin' scares me. I'm
not scared of anything.

Not even tarantulas.

What are they? I don't know.

That's how come
I'm not scared of 'em.

I think they look like
that bug on your shoe.

[Screams] [Laughing]

Alex.

Gee, Aunt Florida, maybe
we should've stayed on the bus.

The heater had stopped
working there, honey.

If we'd stayed there,
we'd have all frozen.

At least we got room
to move around in here.

We won't get drowsy
and fall asleep.

- I'm cold.
- We're gonna die
of "coldnessness!"

Hey, those buildings are boarded
up. How come nobody lives in 'em?

Well, it's an abandoned
redevelopment project.

I'm hungry. I want me a Big Mac.

Well, I think you're gonna
have a little bit of a problem...

finding one in a
neighborhood like this.

I ain't never heard
of no neighborhood...

where you couldn't
walk to a Big Mac place.

You can't walk anywhere.
The snow's four feet tall.

Cool. We'll have them deliver.

They can't do
that. But I'm hungry!

We're gonna die of hungriness!

Now look, kids. Just stop
and think how lucky we are.

We're inside, out of the storm.

I bet they're searchin'
for our bus right now,

and they know we're
somewhere nearby.

We'll be home in no time flat.

We didn't stay on
the regular bus route.

Of course I did.

Oh, no, Aunt Florida. Remember when
you told me that we were turning off...

the regular bus route
because of the snow?

Penny. Oops. Sorry.

Oh, we're gonna die
of "lostnessness." Oh!

[Crying]

Stop it. They'll find
us soon enough.

Hey, I know what we
can do to keep warm.

Let's all do a little jogging.

Say what? Jogging?

What are you, some
kind of health nut?

Maybe you'd like me to warm
the seat of your pants, young man.

That's what I said,
Mrs. Evans. Let's jog.

All right. Now, one, two, three.

[Blows Whistle] And hup, two,
three, four. Hup, two, three, four.

Hup, two, three... Move it!

Hup, two, three, four.
Hup, two, three, four.

Hup... I said move it!

Gone With The Wind. Right.

My charades. Okay.

Come on, brother. Let's see
what you got. ♪♪ [Humming]

A talent show? A song?

[Grunt] Song?

An old song. Um,
"Old Man River"?

Um, "Old Folks at Home"?
"That Old Black Magic"?

Um, "My Old Kentucky Home"?

[Michael] Um, okay,
three words. Second word.

Uh, uh, wife? Girl?

Pal? Pal.

Sounds like Thelma, right?

[Grunting] Your... Your...

Okay, "My Gal." Um, "My Gal Al"?

Wait. Might as well
do the whole alphabet.

"My Gal Al"? Bal, Cal, Dal?

"My Gal Gal"? Yeah, right.

Hey, I heard this
police report on TV.

Bookman, just shut up.
You're bothering us. Hal!

I think I got it. "My
Gal Sal." Right?

Right. "My Gal Sal."

There's this police report on television...
There's no such song, Bookman.

If you keep interruptin', I'm
gonna give you a knuckle sandwich.

If you want to play, play.
But otherwise, play or get out.

That's right, Bookman.
Yeah, but-but...

[Chattering] Okay,
okay, okay, okay.

- You.
- [Thelma] Us?

People? Living person? Yeah.

Seven words.
Okay. Sounds like...

[Keith] Sounds like, uh, lizard!

Lizard. Longer, longer...

Wizard. Wizard, no...

Gizzard? George
Gizzard? Chicken George.

[Thelma] Uh, you
said four words?

Four words. Sounds
like... kiss. Hiss.

Kiss? Hiss? Kiss. Hiss. Longer.

Kissing... Hissing...

[Keith] First two
words. Picture, picture.

Oh, our mama! Our
mama is kissing a lizard!

I got it! I know
I got it this time!

Our mama is missing
in the blizzard. Right.

[Michael, Keith] Our mama
is missing in the blizzard.

[Florida] Come on,
kids. You can't stop now.

Hup, two... Aunt Florida,
it's cold, and we're tired.

Yeah. Hey.

A fire. That's what we need.

A fire. That'll give us heat and
light in case we're here after dark.

Dark?

We're gonna die
of "darknessness!"

Nobody ever died of darkness.

There's always a first time.

Now look, kids. We
gonna look for matches.

And this time, Alex, if you have
any matches, don't be afraid.

I won't tell your folks. Now
look for matches, everybody.

[Florida Mumbles]

Let's face it, Mrs. Evans.
We ain't gonna have us no fire.

We're gonna die of... of...

Of "firelessness."

Say what?

Hey, I know what we'll do.

We'll have us some
entertainment. Come on.

Come on. Come on. You kids are
gonna teach me how to dance the Freak.

All right. Okay?

Like my kids would
say, "Let's get down."

All right? Come on. Okay.

One, two, y'all know what to do.

♪ Come on Let's
do it Let's dance ♪

♪ Dance across the floor ♪

♪ Come on Let's do it
♪ ♪ Yeah, let's do it ♪

[All] ♪ Let's dance
Let's dance some more ♪

♪ Come on Let's
do it ♪ Let's dance ♪

♪ Let's dance across the floor ♪

♪ Come on Let's
do it Let's dance ♪

You do it.

♪ Let's do it Let's dance ♪

♪ Let's dance across the floor ♪

♪ Let's do it Let's do it ♪

♪ Let's dance across the floor ♪

♪ Let's do it Let's do it ♪

♪ Let's dance across the floor ♪

♪ Let's do it Let's do it ♪

♪ Let's dance across the floor ♪

♪ Let's do it Let's do it ♪

[Penny] All right, Aunt Florida.

♪ Let's do it Let's do it ♪

♪ Let's dance across the floor ♪

♪ Let's do it Let's do it ♪

♪ Let's dance across the floor ♪

♪ Let's do it Let's do it ♪

♪ Let's dance ♪♪

Whoo! Eartha Kitt,
eat your heart out.

♪ Let's do it Let's dance ♪

♪ Let's dance across the floor ♪

♪ Let's do it Let's
dance ♪♪ Uh-uh. Kim.

Kim, you can't go
to sleep. Come on.

Now listen. We're all
gonna clap and sing so loud,

they gonna hear us
on Michigan Avenue.

And if the police don't find us,

Motown Records will.

Come on now. But,
Mrs. Evans, I'm sleepy.

We can't do that,
honey. Come on.

Let's all sing and
dance. Now come on.

[All] ♪ Let's do
it Let's dance ♪

♪ Let's dance across the floor ♪

♪ Come on Let's
do it Let's dance ♪

♪ Let's dance some more ♪

♪ Come on Let's do it ♪ Wake up.

♪♪ [Continues, Indistinct]

Why haven't they
found Mama's bus yet?

Thelma, why don't you just
do something constructive...

to keep your mind
off your worrying?

Yeah, Michael, I
guess you're right.

[Keith] Mm-hmm. I'll
go make some muffins.

Baby, please don't make no
muffins. I don't want no muffins.

Why don't you wait
till the blizzard is over,

the ice thaw out, and
we can run away...

Ooh. Oh, hey. I should have known
better than try to get to work today.

Stranded three hours
on the bus. [Keith] Aww.

Only got four blocks.

Willona, I know you're freezin'.

Not necessarily.

Sometimes it can be
the warmest place in the

world if you stand
next to the right man.

Another half an hour, I
might have been engaged.

But anyway, the bus stop...

Hey, what's a matter? I've seen
happier faces on shrunken heads.

Willona. Hmm?

There's something we
should tell you. What, honey?

Well, um,

why don't you have a nice cup of
coffee just to warm your system up?

Keep you warm in the wintertime.
That is an ingenious idea.

Ingenious.

Here you go, Willona.
Thank you, sweetheart.

Coffee's nice and hot. Mm-hmm.

There you go. Now, what is it?

Well, um, it's like
this, Willona. Um...

You tell her, Thelma.

Uh, Willona, would you like
some sugar in your coffee?

Okay, sweetheart.
That's a good idea.

Okay. Willona, don't
you take two teaspoons?

No, no. One's enough.

What is it? What is it?

Well, it's really not that bad.

What you mean,
it's not that bad?

- Huh, Keith?
- [Forced Chuckle]

Well, Willona, we know you're a
cool, calm and totally together person.

That's right.

You're not the type to get
hysterical if you hear bad news.

Okay. Now come on, somebody. Please
tell me what it is. All right. Tell me.

Well, it's just a little
thing. What, honey?

Penny and Ma are
lost in the blizzard!

[Michael] Willona, now
just stay calm, all right?

[Keith] Willona? I'm cool.

You are? Cool,
calm and collected.

[Keith] Yeah.

Willona? Willona?

Yeah? You okay, Willona?

Willona, you all right? I want
another "cof" of "cooffee."

Another... Uh, Willona?

"Cooffee"...
Coffee... "cooffee."

Lord,

I'm afraid I'm gonna need
a little help down here.

Nothin' fancy. No frills.

Strictly economy class.

But, Lord, I want you to help me get these
nice, little kids home to their warm beds.

[Thump]

Now, Lord, I know you work...

in strange and mysterious ways,

but I never knew
you worked that fast.

[Thump] Who's out there?

[Man] Who's out there?

Aunt Florida, is he a
heavenly messenger?

No, stupid. He's
either Ernest or Julio.

The name is Donald.

And you've been disturbin'
my beauty rest all day.

What are you doing here?

Oh, well, I should ask you what
you are doing in my townhouse!

Our school bus got
stuck in the snow.

Man, I'm freezing.
Your place sure is cold.

Hmm. Not when you
carry your own antifreeze.

Oh, beg your pardon.
Pardon my ill-mannered self.

Have some?

We're not quite
ready for that yet.

Well, I am.

- [Coughing]
- You got a match?

Match?

Don't you know what the surgeon
general said about smokin'?

[Clearing Throat]

You see what I... [Coughs] mean?

Gee, that's the worst
smoker's cough I've ever heard.

Yeah.

And just imagine if I smoked.

Mister, we don't want a
smoke. We want to build a fire.

Ah, some matches from
my favorite pump room.

Where I get may favorite
chitterlings à la flambeau.

- It's empty.
- Now you just be patient.

I live here. I know
what I'm doing.

Now look, kids, there
are only two matches here,

so let's gather up
all the wood you can.

Hurry. Hey, wait a minute.

What y'all doing with
my palatial home here?

Wait! Hey, that's my bathtub.

Wait a minute.
What y'all doin' here?

Stop these kids here.
What's wrong with y'all?

Is that all the
wood you can find?

That's it. The whole
enchilada. My Lord.

There's a bunch of old
junk in the room next door.

No, no, no! Not my
winter furnishings, please!

Well, it's either that
or us. Go get it, kids.

Now wait a minute.
Y'all... Y'all...

What's wrong with them
fools, huh? They crazy?

Aw, there goes
my breakfast nook.

And my bedroom suite.

Hey, that has a
lot of value to me.

My dear, old daddy
slept in that bed.

Are you crazy?

I hope these still strike.

Give me that match. I'm
gonna light the first one.

After all, I insist.

This is my memories
that's going up in smoke.

Oh! Give me that last match.

What's wrong with you?

Yeah!

Hey. Now we can get warm.

Yeah, so can I.

Did you hear what
they called Ma?

"The most courageous school
bus driver in Chicago." All right.

Honey, I had no doubt in
my mind they'd be saved.

- That's why you were catatonic.
- [Willona] I was not catatonic.

- Can we join the party?
- [Michael] Ma! Hey!

[Chattering]

Take of your gloves.
How was you?

Aunt Florida saved our lives. She built
a fire and even made us do the Freak.

The Freak? Yeah. Come on,
Aunt Florida. Let's show them.

Oh, come on, Penny. Show
'em what you can do, child.

♪ Let's dance Let's dance ♪

♪ Come on Let's do it ♪

♪ Let's dance Let's
dance some more ♪

♪♪ [Continues, Indistinct]

♪ It all looks hand-me-down ♪

♪ Good times Good times ♪

♪ Keepin' your
head above water ♪

♪ Makin' a wave when you can ♪

♪ Temporary layoffs ♪
♪ Good times ♪

♪ Easy credit rip-offs ♪
♪ Good times ♪

♪ Ain't we lucky we got 'em ♪

Good Times was videotaped before a
studio audience. ♪ Good times ♪♪