Good Times (1974–1979): Season 4, Episode 22 - J.J. in Business - full transcript

♪ Good Times ♪

♪ Anytime You meet a payment ♪

♪ Good Times ♪

♪ Anytime You feel free ♪

♪ Good Times ♪

♪ Anytime you're
Out from under ♪

♪ Not getting hassled
Not getting hustled ♪

♪ Keeping your
head Above water ♪

♪ Making a wave when you can ♪

♪ Temporary layoffs ♪

♪ Good Times ♪



♪ Easy credit Rip-offs ♪

♪ Good Times ♪

♪ Scratching And surviving ♪

♪ Good Times ♪

♪ Hanging in A chow line ♪

♪ Good Times ♪

♪ Ain't we lucky we got 'em ♪

♪ Good Times ♪♪

[TELEPHONE RINGS]

Chello?

Dy-no-mite Greeting
Card Company.

J.J. Evans, resident
president speaking.

Yeah, we're the company

that makes the
black greeting cards.



Yeah, you want a dozen
Washington birthday cards?

Is that George or Booker T.?

Okay, you'll have
them tomorrow. Bye.

Well, Damon, we
just got another order.

Hey, that's great, J.J.

Man, we're really cooking, huh?

J.J., you should have
been at your rib delivery job

a long time ago.

You want a lift?

I'm going to show our line
to Sid's Discount Stores.

No, I've got a rendezvous

with a couple of
our crack writers.

Then I'll check you later.

Hey, look here, crack writer.

Michael, how you coming along

with that black sympathy card?

Everything's coming
along great, J.J.

On the outside, the
card's gonna say...

[CLEARS THROAT]

"Expressing our sympathy
on the loss of your Cadillac."

And on the inside,
it's gonna go like this...

"Hot dog, you had a hog,

"your fortunes
were really blessed.

"We just hope that you can cope

since it's just
been repossessed."

A couple more
like that, Michael,

and I'll be able to quickly
repay the money I got

to get this business going.

Thelma, how are you coming along

with that St.
Patrick's Day card?

Oh, I only wrote
one little verse.

Well, let's hear it,
my little leprechaun.

Well, um...

"Hello, St. Patrick,
a big welcome back.

It's a good thing you're
Irish instead of black."

Wait, now...

"Because people would
stare wherever you'd go

and say, 'Who's the
dude with the green Afro?'"

[CLEARS THROAT]

Thelma, forget
St. Patrick's Day.

[TELEPHONE RINGS]

Mm-mm-mm. Mm.

Chello?

Dy-no-mite Greeting
Card Company.

J.J. Evans, resident
president speaking.

Oh, hello, Mr. Jason.

Oh, yeah.

I know I'm more
than an hour late,

but I'm on my way.

Yeah, you say
you're up to your what

in orders of ribs to go?

Well, why don't you

get Ferguson's Funeral
Home to deliver them?

Yeah, they're used
to delivering cold ribs.

Just jiving.

Just jiving.

Yeah, I'm on my way.

Okay, bye.

Well, I've got to keep
on keeping on, y'all.

Get off to work here.

THELMA: Okay.

MICHAEL: All right, J.J.

Find out what's happening.

Well...

Whoo, looky, looky, at
this little brown cookie.

I'm looking for
Mr. James Evans, Jr.

Well, look no further.

I am James Evans, Jr.,

known far and wide
as "the beige rage."

Karen Casey. I'm an accountant.

The Minority Business
Office asked me to come over

and help you set up your books.

Oh, yeah, we've
been expecting you,

but when they
said an accountant,

I thought you'd
be a bald-headed,

shriveled-up old
man with glasses.

Well, Damon, you
go to your accountant,

and I will go to mine.

The Dy-no-mite
Greeting Card Company

has three partners, Miss Casey.

I'm Damon Stevenson,
the super printer,

Curtis Gordon is
our super salesman,

and the artwork
is handled by J.J.,

the super weird.

Enough of the small chitchat.

Why don't me and you

go down here with the books

and discuss the, uh... figures.

[CLEARS THROAT]

Preferably, we can,
uh... start with yours.

No, Mr. Evans, you
just give me the books,

and I'll do it all myself.

Well, our ledger
and financial data

is right there.

Thank you, Mr. Evans.

Uh-huh.

[CHUCKLING]

Well, it's time for
me to get to the job

that pays the rent around here.

I'll talk to y'all later on.

MICHAEL AND THELMA:
See you later, J.J.

Ooh, kids, I'm so
glad you're all here.

I want to read to you the
Mother's Day card I wrote.

Oh, but Ma, I'm late for work.

Oh, but this will
only take a minute,

and it's gonna sell
millions, it's so original.

On the outside it says,
"Happy Mother's Day, Mom."

Oh, that's original.

[CHUCKLES]

And then you open
it up, and it says,

"To a dear, sweet,
wonderful mother,

"who nursed me and burped me

when I was a baby..."

That's great, Ma.

"Who, as my first
birthday passed,

kept me dry and
fondled me with love..."

Oh, Ma.

"Who, after I was 2,

"patiently taught
me to talk, walk,

and feed myself."

Oh, Ma.

"And who, when I reached
the tender age of 3..."

Uh, Ma, hold it.

Hold it.

But I'm not finished.

Uh, Ma, that makes Roots

sound like a
"Bicentennial Minute."

I guess it is a little long.

Ma, don't worry.
The thought is there.

Thank you.

Yeah, we can always edit it.

Yeah, Ma, you gotta poe-cize it.

Get it down to
something like this.

"As a child,

"I was glad I had
a mother like you,

"who saw me through

"all the changes
I put her through,

"but as I'm older,
I'm luckier still

"that when you were younger,

they didn't have the pill."

That's not what I was thinking.

Well, Ma, we'll
talk about that later.

I gotta get off to work.

Hi. Bye.

Hold it, hold it.

The girls in the boutique
wanna order 42 more

of those "Goodbye,
Tacky Turkey" cards.

That's wonderful.

That's great, Willona.

Ooh, whoever wrote that

is going to have a nice royalty.

I certainly will.

Okay, how does
your card go again?

On the outside it
says, "Goodbye."

On the inside it says,

"You told me that I was
the only woman in your life,

"then I found out
you had a wife.

"Now, I didn't yell or
do none of that mess.

I just gave a mugger
your name and address."

[TELEPHONE RINGING]

Chello? J.J... Oh,
hello there, Mr. Jason.

Yeah. Well, I know I'm...
I'm not at the rib joint.

Well, I'm not there
because, uh...

I'm here.

But I'm on my way.

I'm on my... What?

Hand in my cow?

Oh, but wait a minute.

I'm fired?

But wait a minute,
I didn't... Hello?

How do you like that?

I just got canned.

Oh, J.J., I'm
sorry to hear that.

Oh, J.J., that's terrible.

Well, come on, son,
don't worry about it.

You'll more than make up for it

with these greeting cards.

No, Ma.

We can't afford
to take any money

out of the business yet.

The family needed that job.

We'll manage.

Now, this is the first
chance you've had

to make good
money with your art.

This isn't just a
hustle or a pipe dream.

It's something you
can be... proud of.

Yeah, I guess you're right, Ma.

[CHUCKLES]

Well, I'll have plenty of time

to work at it now.

Thanks, Ma.

Hello, everybody.

Look who's here.

The soul version of
the Goodyear Blimp.

What do you want, Bookman?

I just thought I'd drop by

to throw the kid some
business, Mrs. Evans.

What did you have in
mind for cards, Bookman?

"Sorry to hear about your fat?"

Very amusing.

You know, I felt I was
losing touch with my tenants.

So I decided to close
the humanity gap.

Honey, you could close the gap

in the Grand Canyon
by sitting on it.

That's a cold shot, Miss Woods.

I'm hip, hippo.

However, I had in mind

a card printed with
this warm sentiment.

"It's from me to you,

"and it's fact, not fiction,

my very best wishes
for a happy eviction."

Look, J.J., give me
a break on this, man.

We're old friends, you know?

Hey, Bookman, man,

isn't that your car down
there they're towing away?

I ain't got no car.

Well, it must be my mistake.

It must be Mrs. Bookman
they're towing away.

I've gotta go to
work, and if I hurry,

I can hitch a ride
on Mrs. Bookman.

Yeah, Ma, I have to leave too.

I'm going to the library
to do some research

on black holidays. Okay.

Yeah, and I gotta
go cook dinner.

All right. You're cooking?

I better do some research
on food poisoning, then.

Mr. Evans...

Yes, my sweet?

Mr. Evans, have you given me

all of your assets?

Uh, what you see is what I got.

Uh, excuse me.

Excuse me, is this the, um...

Dy-no-mite Greeting
Card Company?

Yeah, that's us. Uh,
what can we do for you?

I'm Robert Lawrence

out of Woodruff,
Clay, and Jacoby.

Oh, I'm James Evans, Jr.,

out of poverty,
hunger, and pain.

Uh...

We're an advertising
agency, Mr. Evans.

We offer free consultation
to minority businesses

to help them compete
in the marketplace.

Oh, that's great.

Over there is my partner,
Damon Stevenson.

How you doing?

And this here's my
mother, Florida Evans.

How do you do? Mrs. Evans.

Now, then, when we gonna get on

with doing them TV commercials?

[CHUCKLES]

Well, I doubt that this business

is quite ready for
TV commercials.

But of course they're ready.

We've even got a slogan.

"For a message with
soul that says it right,

"send a card
from... Dy-no-mite."

Well, uh, I'm afraid there's
more to TV advertising

than slogans.

Uh, here.

If you'll just fill out this
marketing questionnaire,

it'll help us determine
your advertising needs.

I'll pick it up in
a couple of days.

In the meanwhile,

may I take a few of your
cards back to the agency?

Yeah, sure.

Uh, as we say in the
advertising business,

we'll run it up the flagpole

and see if anybody salutes.

Well, as we say

in our advertising business,

let's feed it to the duck
and see if it quacks.

You say that?

[CHUCKLES]

See you in a couple of days.

Uh, Ma, how you coming along
with that Mother's Day card?

Oh, I was just working on it.

See how this sounds.

"I could take you to a movie,

"I could take you to a drama,

"but I'd rather take
this time to say,

'Hello there, Mama.'"

Well, Ma, you're a
regular Gwendolyn Brooks.

Oh, thank you.

Good afternoon, everybody.

Damon. J.J.

Hey, Carl.

Hi, there, Carl.

Florida.

Mm.

Well, now,

being an investor
in this concern,

I thought I'd stop by to
see how my money is doing.

It's doing great,
Carl, just great.

I mean, business
is a little slow now,

but, you know, we be
picking up, picking up.

That's right, J.J. Give it time.

J.J., Damon, hey, everybody,
we're gonna be rich.

I just made the biggest sale

since the Indians
sold Manhattan.

Don't tell me you
sold our company

for some jive beads.

No, fool.

I just left the buyers at
Sid's Discount Stores,

and he wants our cards.

Not just for the ghetto stores,

not just for their
Chicago stores,

but for all the
stores in Illinois!

Whoa! Look out!

And here is his order
for 10,000 greeting cards.

Ooh, 10,000.

Look out, brother!

J.J.!

You did it.

Excuse me.

Excuse me, uh,

but as your accountant,
I'd better tell you...

you have to buy a
lot of paper and ink

to print up 10,000 cards.

So we'll buy it.

It means you'll have
to spend at least $2000.

So we'll spend it.

Not when all you have
in the bank is $68.13.

So we'll lose the business.

68 dollars and 13 cents?

J.J.?

What are you gonna do?

Hey, we still got time
to figure something out.

I mean, the contract says

we don't have to
deliver for 30 days.

Uh, J.J., why don't
you do like I did?

Go to a bank.

I went to a bank
once and got a loan.

I admit it's tough,

but it's not impossible.

Carl is right, J.J.

Well, okay, but
suppose I go to the bank,

try to get a loan, and
they don't give it to me?

There's always the S.B.A.,

the Small Business
Administration.

It lends money to
small businesses.

Well, I know one thing for sure.

If we don't get the
money from the S.B.A.,

and we don't get the
money from the bank,

we'll get one thing for sure.

What's that, son?

It's from Bookman to us.

"And it's a fact, not fiction.

My very best wishes
for a happy eviction."

I don't know why
we're here at the S.B.A.

We don't stand
much better chance

than we did at the banks.

J.J., I know it sounds silly

to say "cheer up"

after you've been turned
down by four banks.

But what the hell? Cheer up.

It's supposed to be an
equal opportunity lender.

The only opportunity
a brother has

walking out of a
bank with any money

is if he walks in
wearing a ski mask.

That's a lot of bull.

I got money from the bank.

I didn't wear a ski mask.

I wore a suit, a
shirt, and a tie.

Well, you would have
left with more money

if you had worn a suit,
a tie, and a ski mask.

J.J., that's the wrong attitude.

That's the right att-o-tude.

Well, I'll tell you what,

you keep your
"att-o-tude" to yourself,

and while we are
here, I'll do the talking.

Oh, but Carl... No buts.

I'm the one with the
cash in this business,

and I don't aim to lose it,

so keep your mouth shut.

I'll be as quiet
as a little mousy.

Shh.

Gentlemen.

I'm sorry to keep you waiting,

but waiting is part of the game.

I'm J.J. Evans, president

of the Dy-no-mite
Greeting Card Company.

[LOUDLY] Now, I'm here... J.J.!

To introduce my, uh,
financial consultant,

Carl Dixon.

How do you do?

I'm Irma Austin.

Sit down.

[CLEARS THROAT]

Now, Miss Austin... That's "Ms."

Ms. Austin, we
are here to see...

To see about some money,
some dinero, some yen,

some moola, mama.

J.J.!

We... We are here to
see about getting a loan.

Well, in order to qualify
for an S.B.A. loan,

you must be turned
down by at least two banks.

Four would be better.

Uh, well, we qualify perfectly.

We've been turned
down more times

than a training bra
on Charlie's Angels.

J.J.!

Well...

since 91 percent of
all new businesses fold

within the first five years,

the banks have
gotten a little cautious.

Cautious?

J.J... J.J., remember
the little mousy.

How much of a loan
do you need, Mr. Dixon?

Two thousand dollars.

You see, we got a big
order for greeting cards,

but we don't have
the raw stock to fill it.

Do you have any collateral?

A-A building,
equipment, a small child?

That's just my little
joke, you know?

[CHUCKLES]

Your little joke.

Well, we do have
a printing press...

Yeah, it's in great condition,

thanks to the po-lice.

The po-lice?

J.J.!

Uh, yeah, you see,

it was seized in a numbers raid.

Two brothers tried to
flush it down a toilet,

but what happened was

when they got it down there,

it got a little heavy
for the machine...

J.J.! J.J.!

Will you please be quiet?

Now, here is our balance sheet.

Oh.

Uh, profit and loss statement.

Uh-huh.

And other pertinent papers.

I see.

Well, now, uh... Oh, dear.

You haven't been
in business very long.

You don't have very
much cash in the bank.

Oh, it's going to be tough.

But I think

that due to the
nature of the loan,

and the, uh...

and the amount,
it can be approved.

You... You mean we've...
We've got the loan?

Oh, I'll recommend it, yes.

When do we get... get the check?

Well...

Well, it takes at
least 30 working days

to process the loan,

and then after that,
about 60 more days.

That's 90 days.

We can't wait that long!

J.J... J.J., J.J., please.

This has to be handled
with delicacy and tact.

[CHUCKLES]

Why the hell do we have
to wait so long to get it?

Because we don't have any funds.

You mean the
government is broke?

No, no, I don't mean that.

I mean that we've used
up all our allotted funds

for this quarter,

and we won't have
any more funds to loan

until next quarter.

You're joking.

Okaying the loan

and not giving it to
us for three months

is like handing us a
life raft with a hole in it.

Well, Mr. Evans,

why don't you ask for an
extension on your order?

[LAUGHS]

Ninety days is nothing.

Why, sometimes our loans
are held up for six months.

No wonder so many
small businesses sink.

The government is
firing the torpedoes.

Mr. Dixon, that's
the wrong attitude.

Ms. Austin, that's
the right att-o-tude!

Uh, Carl, I think we
better be going here.

Well, if you get that extension,

just remember your
government's behind you.

Well, I'd rather have
'em out in front of me

where I can keep a eye on 'em.

Come on, Carl, I told you

we should have
wore that ski mask.

[DOOR CLOSES]

It's been an odd day.

Odd.

Hey, J.J., are you sure

you want to print this
novelty card Michael wrote?

Which one is it?

Dig this.

"I hope your marriage
turns out all right,

"though you are
black, and he is white.

"A lot of people might
not think it's wise,

but I don't care,
you're two great guys."

The kid's all heart.

Hey, Curtis, our super salesman.

What's happening? Hey, man.

Did you sell Sid
on the extension?

No, he wouldn't go for it, J.J.

The order's been canceled.

You're jiving.

No, I wish I was.

Wow, what are we gonna do now?

Well, guys, what
this boils down to

is I think we should
do an "el foldo."

Do we have to?

Well, we can't get enough dough

to print the big orders,

and the little orders
don't pay the light bills.

So if we sell all the
equipment in here,

we can repay all the money

we borrowed from our friends.

I guess.

I guess you're right.

Well, Dy-no-mite Greeting Cards

bites the dust.

J.J., did you get the extension?

Yeah, we got extended
right out of the business.

Oh, I'm sorry, J.J.,

but even though
it didn't work out,

I'm proud of you.

Why? I let the
whole family down.

No, you didn't.

Now, the important
thing is you tried,

and look what you learned.

Yeah, I learned
that if you're black,

and you can't get any
green, you wind up in the red.

Hello, Mrs. Evans.

J.J., the guys at the agency

went over that
marketing questionnaire

you filled out

and came up with
some workable ideas.

Yeah, well, unless one of
them includes life after death,

you can forget 'em.

What do you mean?

Our greeting cards are going

to that big post
office in the sky.

You're out of business?

Yeah, things didn't work out.

Oh, that's too bad...

but to tell you the truth, J.J.,

this could be a
blessing in disguise.

[CHUCKLES]

Well, if it is, the
disguise is so good

that it's fooling everybody.

No, I mean it.

J.J., you remember
those greeting cards

I took back to the agency?

Yeah.

Well, I fed them to the
duck, and the duck quacked.

The creative people loved them.

They thought the artwork
was really something special.

Well, you know, what can I say?

They told me to
offer the artist a job

if he ever became available.

Oh, is this artist available!

The job title is
"junior art director."

You'd do renderings,
layouts, paste-ups,

what all our art guys
do when they start,

but with your talent,
you'd go up the ladder fast.

J.J., that's wonderful.

I don't know, Ma.

J.J., Mr. Lawrence is
offering you a career.

Now, working with your art
is what you've always wanted,

and it's where you belong.

Take the job, dummy.

But Ma, I can't just

leave my partners
out in the cold.

I mean, we launched
this ship together,

and we're gonna
deep-six it as one.

Forget it, man.

It's you they want.

Yeah, but wait a minute, man.

We're partners.

Together, the three of us.

Hey, a funny thing
happened at Sid's, J.J.

Yeah, I know. You
didn't get the extension.

No, uh, they offered
me a job as a salesman.

Yeah, but you turned it down.

No, J.J., I-I took it.

Well, there's still
me and Damon.

Well, J.J.,

until I can find a
steady printing gig,

I'm gonna take
this part-time job

I just copped.

Part time job?

My cow!

Hey, man, somebody
had to take the gig.

It was open.

Better me than a stranger.

Anyway, it's time
for me to split.

You know how crazy Mr. Jason is

about delivering
his ribs on time.

CURTIS: I've gotta
be going too, J.J.

Good luck on your job, man.

All right, thanks, man.

Take it easy,
okay? See you later.

Okay, later on, bro.

Well, Mr. Lawrence,

looks like you got
yourself a new art director.

Junior art director.

That's today.

Be at my office
at 9:00 a.m. sharp,

in the morning.

Oh, he'll be there at 8:30.

See you then, J.J.

Goodbye, Mrs. Evans.

Goodbye.

Oh, J.J., I'm so happy for you,

and you should be happy too.

I am, Ma, and if I
were a greeting card,

I would read,

"The struggling and
hassling have finally passed,

"the cute kid from the ghetto

has made it at last."

That's the spirit, son.

That's the spirit.

♪ Mmm... ♪

♪ Just looking
Out of the window ♪

♪ Watching the asphalt grow ♪

♪ Thinking how It all
looks hand-me-down ♪

♪ Good Times ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Good Times ♪

♪ Keeping your
head Above water ♪

♪ Making a wave when you can ♪

♪ Temporary layoffs ♪

♪ Good Times ♪

♪ Easy credit rip-offs ♪

♪ Good times ♪

ANNOUNCER: Good Times is
videotaped in front of a studio audience.

♪ Good Times ♪♪