Good Times (1974–1979): Season 4, Episode 17 - Willona's Surprise - full transcript

♪ Good Times ♪

♪ Anytime you meet a payment ♪

♪ Good Times ♪

♪ Anytime you feel free ♪

♪ Good Times ♪

♪ Anytime you're
Out from under ♪

♪ Not getting hassled
Not getting hustled ♪

♪ Keeping your
head Above water ♪

♪ Making a wave when you can ♪

♪ Temporary layoffs ♪

♪ Good Times ♪



♪ Easy credit rip-offs ♪

♪ Good Times ♪

♪ Scratching and surviving ♪

♪ Good Times ♪

♪ Hanging in a chow line ♪

♪ Good Times ♪

♪ Ain't we lucky we got 'em ♪

♪ Good Times ♪♪

Thelma, how come
the cakes you make

never come out like
the cakes on this box?

Oh, I was gonna let
you lick the spoon,

but if you feel
that way about it,

lick the box.

Oh, Thelma,



you did a nice job on that cake.

Thank you, Ma.

I wonder why your cakes

never look like the
picture on the box.

Yeah.

Oh, well.

Ma, you know, I don't even
know how old Willona is.

How many candles should I use?

Oh, let me see now...

Ten, twenty, thirty...
[MUTTERS TWICE]

No, you better
not use that many.

We don't want to start
another Chicago fire.

Ma, why is it that
women are so sensitive

about their ages?

That's not true.
I'm not sensitive.

All right, then how old are you?

Thirty, forty...

How would you like me
to go upside your head?

That's it, I'm finished.

I decided to use one candle.

Ah, now, that was being tactful.

No, that's all we got left.

Oh.

Well, I better hide this
cake in the bedroom

so Willona doesn't see it.

Right, right.

Ma, I wonder if J.J.'s gonna

stick his elbow
in the cake again

like he did last year.

That sure was funny.

I don't think that was so funny.

J.J. messed up a good suit,

and Willona kept wondering

why the cake was
so low in the middle.

Is it safe?

Yeah, J.J. It's all
clear. Come on.

Boy, I can't tell you

the hassle I had
carrying this thing

on the bus here today.

This lady kept yakking
and yakking at me.

About what?

I don't know.

When I stood up to find out,
she went and took my seat.

Come on, son, let's see it.

All right.

[GASPING] Wow.

Oh!

All right!

J.J., you had it framed so nice.

Oh, I'm sure Willona's
just gonna love it.

But how were
you able to paint it

without her knowing it?

Hey, painting it
without her knowing it

was no big problem.

Painting it when
she wasn't talking,

now that was the problem.

Well, Willona will
be here any minute,

so hide the painting
in my room, okay?

Right!

Oh, Ma, you know,

do you think we
did the right thing

by inviting Ray?

You know, he and Willona

have been divorced,
like, six years,

and you know how
Willona feels about the man.

Yeah, the way a barber
feels about Kojak's head.

You know, when Ray called,

I couldn't do nothing
else but invite him.

That man sweet-talked
me so much,

by the time I hung
up that phone,

I had gained five pounds.

J.J.: Thelma, you dummy!

The cake. Oh!

Girl, how many times I tell you?

J.J., let me see your sleeve!

Oh, it's all right.

What a relief!

We thought you stuck
your elbow in the cake again.

No way.

FLORIDA: J.J.!

Oh, J.J., you did it again.

Thelma, how
many times I tell you

not to put the cake

where somebody's gonna sit?

I don't have eyes in my behind.

No, just brains.

Either change your pants,

or put some frosting
on your shirt to match.

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

Now, that might be Willona.

Come on, kids.

But remember now,

this is supposed
to be a surprise.

Go ahead. Go ahead.

[TOOTING]

Light up the candles,

toot on the horn,
today is the day

that Willona was born!

Whoo!

Whoo!

Willona, we wanted
to surprise you.

Well, honey, you see,

I knew you wasn't gonna
let my birthday pass

without a party,

and I knew it was my birthday

the first thing I woke
up this morning, honey

crying.

Willona, why were you crying?

Because I knew I would
never see 24 again.

[LAUGHING]

You haven't seen 24 in so long,

you'd hardly recognize it.

Flo, you know,
that was very cold.

Happy birthday, Willona.

Thank you, baby.

Happy birthday, Willona.
Thank you, sugar.

And many, many more.

Oh, Flo.

Okay, let's get the
party on the road.

Hey, what's your hurry?
What's your hurry?

If we start it a little later,

the birthday'll
last a little longer.

Mm, well. Well,
come on, Michael.

Let's go see if we can help J.J.

Yeah, he needs
it. Flo, sit down.

I got some news to
tell you. Oh, news!

Yes, I do, yes I do. All righty.

What is it? Guess who called me.

Give me a hint.

Well, he's tall, dark,
and double-crossing,

and I used to be married to him.

You used to be married to him?

Mm-hmm.

Give me another hint.

Flo, Ray is back in town.

Ray is back in town?

Yes, Lord.

Ooh, I know you can
hardly wait to see him.

Are you crazy? Hmm?

I mean, take another ride
on that roller coaster again?

Uh-uh. Not yours truly.

I mean, that dude got
more girls' phone numbers

than the Chicago telephone book.

Now, I wouldn't say
that Ray catted about,

but I will say when
we got our divorce,

he got custody
of the kitty litter.

[LAUGHING]

Uh, Willona, I might
as well tell you the truth.

What?

Ray called me.

What?

He wanted me to invite him over.

Well, did you?

Oh, Willona, I'd just as soon

stand on my head in
Marshall Field's window.

Mm-hmm.

Willona, would it
hurt you to see him?

Flo, aren't you hip to
Willona's golden rule?

Do unto the dude

before the dude do it unto you.

You know, if that
dude walked in here

right this minute,

I would stomp up
one side of him, honey,

and down the other.

So what else is new?

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

Flo, are you gonna
open that door?

Door? What door?

Honey, you better see a doctor

about your ears.

Somebody is definitely
knocking on this...

Ray.

Hi, Willie.

Oh.

So when does
the first show start

at Marshall Field's?

You remember six years ago,

when you told me to go to hell?

Well, I'm back.

Big deal.

Willona, you could
at least talk to him.

Ray, come on in.

I'm a changed man, Willie.

Sure, and a tiger
can change his spots.

Stripes. Tigers have stripes.

Whatever.

Well, I guess I better
check on the kids.

Yeah, that's a good idea.

Now, don't blame Florida.

It's your birthday,
and I missed you.

Humph.

Happy birthday, Willie.

Hey! Don't touch me.

Anyway, you're still
number one my charts.

Ooh, now, where have I heard

those words before?

Oh, yeah, I remember.

That came right after,

"Honest, baby, never again."

Now, that was
then, but this is now.

And that's the door.

Use it.

Now, you know
you don't mean that.

Hey, try me.

Get out of my face and
leave me alone, Ray.

I can't leave you alone.

You're everywhere I go, baby.

Hey, what did you come back for?

You sure know how
to louse up a birthday.

♪ Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday to you ♪

♪ Happy birthday, dear Willona ♪

♪ Happy birthday to you ♪♪

Oh, thank you, thank you.

Oh! Yay!

What'd you wish for?

Same as last year.

That the cake wasn't
so low in the middle.

Oh, J.J., you didn't.

Hey, Ray, my man.

Hey, Ray.

J.J. Hey, Michael.

Oh, no, no. Now, don't tell me.

Now, this couldn't be Thelma.

It's me.

I'll say it is.

You know, I go
away for six years,

and you come out to be
a beautiful young woman.

Thank you, Ray.

Hey, Ray, you
still playing bass?

♪ Chicka-ding Chicka-ding ♪

♪ Chicka-ding Chicka-ding ♪♪

What else, man?

But, uh...

it's off the road
for this musician.

No, I'm settling in.

A little combo at the Sheraton.

Finally got my head straight.

Honest.

Don't mean chitterlings to me.

Now, why don't we all sit down

and have some cake and coffee?

Oh, Florida, I am sorry, baby.

God knows, I
should have told you

how good it is to see you again.

Oh, Ray.

You always been
the sweetest thing

since sugar to me, baby.

Oh, thank you.

Whoo, sweet-talked me again.

There goes another pound, Ma.

Oh, shush.

Ah-ha!

Well, well, Willona.

We did not forget your birthday.

We got you a present.

Voilà.

Oh, J.J., I love it.

It's gorgeous.

It's sensational.

It's fantastic.

It's me.

Oh, honey, thank you.

Willona, how about a
little sugar for the frame?

Mmm. Thanks, everybody.

You know, J.J.,

I mean, you are some
kind of genius, man.

Well, you know, what can I say?

You have captured the picture

that I have been
holding in my heart

all these years.

You might have
held it in your heart,

but in your wallet,

you had the pictures
of three other girls.

Here we go, here we go.

Willona, why don't
you cut the cake?

Okay.

Make mine an end piece.

Since J.J. sat in it,
they're all end pieces.

Looks good to me, Thelma.

Oh, well, thank you for this.

It's beautiful.

Oh, I'm glad you like it.

Yeah.

Here you go, Ray.
Thank you, darling.

Well, Ray, where
are you staying?

Oh, I took a small
apartment not far from here.

Oh? Very quiet place.

You know, you'd be surprised
how domesticated I've become.

Oh?

I mean, I cook. Everything.

Oh!

Cook?

I remember in the olden days,

I couldn't even get
you to make the toast.

You were never home long enough

for it to pop up.

Even so, baby, those
were the good times.

I remember you'd
come by the club,

and we'd go out
for burgers and fries

at Sneaky Sam's.

And remember the waitress
you was always hitting on?

Sleazy Sarah?

You know, I never minded
you over-tipping her,

but I just didn't dig

where you put the tip.

[LAUGHING]

Ah, baby,

I guess you'll never
get over being uptight.

I'm sorry, Florida.

That's all right. I tried.

Kids.

Oh, by the way.

A little birthday present.

For the good times.

Ray, wait a minute.

Willona, aren't
you gonna open it?

Ray, wait a minute.

Hey, I don't know
what this is, but, uh,

this is the first time

you ever gave me anything.

Willona, open it, please. Okay.

I'm so nervous... Oh!

Oh, Willona, that's
a beautiful locket!

Oh, yeah.

Ray... Hey, thank
you. It's lovely.

You know, I came this close
to getting you a diamond ring...

Oh, ho, ho, ho.

But then I ran out of
Cracker Jack boxes.

Hey, I know you.

When you decide to
go, you go first class.

Oh, listen, Ray, maybe
I have been wrong.

Maybe a tiger can
change its spots.

Stripes.

Whatever, honey.

Ray, you haven't
had your cake yet.

Why don't you stay a while?

Hooray! I thought
you'd never ask.

First piece of cake
for Ray, honey.

First slice goes to him.

Oh, thanks, baby.

Yeah. Yeah.

How do you like the cake, Ray?

How do you like it?

Dee-licious.

Thelma, honey, can you
fasten this for me, please?

Okay, Ma.

You sure you don't want
to go shopping with us?

I'm sure, Ma.

I have a lot of studying to do.

In high school, you can get by

if you just open the books.

In college, you got to
study them bad boys.

Oh, Ma, I just broke it!

Oh, that's all right, honey.

Well, we won't be long.

I just got to match
some threads.

♪ I'm in love I'm in love ♪

Oh, boy.

♪ I'm in love With
a wonderful guy ♪

Oh, Willona, do we have to wait

for the bus to go downtown,

or could I hitch a
ride on your cloud?

It shows, huh? Mm-hmm.

Uh-huh. For the last six weeks,
ever since Ray's been back.

Oh, isn't it ridiculous?

I mean, no ordinary man

should have the power

to make a woman feel so good.

Ooh, Lord, but then again,

Ray is no ordinary man.

Willona, how does it feel

to be in love all over again

with the same man, huh?

It feels... Yeah?

Scary.

Because, this time, if
anything goes wrong,

it would wipe me out.

Well, this time is for all time.

Believe me, I know.

Hey, hey, hey.

Can you two loudmouths
keep a secret?

Oh! A secret? What
is it? What is it?

Listen, I know you cool,

but every time Flo
hears one little thing,

she goes down to the
Laundromat and run her mouth,

blabbing all over the place.

Willona, when have I
ever blabbed everything

all over the laundry room?

The time I threatened to
put starch in your pantyhose

unless you told
me what you heard.

Come on, Willona,
tell us. All right.

Cross your heart and
hope to die, you won't tell.

Willona, you're looking
at a face without a mouth.

Now, here it is. Okay.

Yes, what?

Ray and I are
getting married again.

[SHRIEKING]

Hey, hey, hey.
What are you doing?

What are you doing?

Well, I got to tell somebody.

Oh, Flo.

I was only teasing.

Willona, that's wonderful.

Flo, will you be my bridesmaid?

I did it before,

and I'm gonna keep on doing it

till you do it right.

This time, it's gonna be right.

You know, maybe
we'll even have a baby.

Oh, that would
be so nice for Ray.

I remember what James said
when I told him J.J. was coming.

He said... He said,

"If it's all the same with you,

could we have someone else?"

Oh, Thelma, that's
not... That is not true.

Wouldn't that be nice?

A little baby boy
that looked like Ray?

Ooh! Oh, no, no, no.

No, you gotta
have a little girl.

Then I get to teach her
how to cook and sew.

And then I'm going to
teach her about Women's Lib

so she wouldn't have
to waste her whole life

cooking and sewing.

Come on, let's go.

Okay. Listen, honey.

Now, Ray and I are
going out to dinner tonight.

Now, if he gets
back before I do,

don't you let him get away.

Okay.

All right. Come on, Willona.

Oh, let's go.

Okay, see you all later, now.

Okay. All right.

[RINGS]

Hello.

Oh, hi, J.J.

No, no messages.

Sure I'm sure.

Honestly, nobody called you.

I am not lying!

Oh, wait a minute,
wait a minute.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

A chick just called here
about a second ago.

Oh, yeah, and she said

she never wants
to see you again.

And she also said

if you dare show your
face around her place,

her father

is gonna introduce
your nose to your left ear.

I don't know who she was.
She didn't leave her name.

Now let him sweat.

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

Hey.

Hey, Ray.

You just missed Willona.

Yeah, that's what I thought

when there was
nobody home next door.

Well, um, you're welcome

to wait here if you like.

Okay.

I have a lot of studying to do.

I have a French exam tomorrow.

Oh, hey, maybe I can help.

You know, I worked on a
French cruise liner once.

[FRENCH ACCENT]
Learned to speak ze language

like a native of Chicago.

Well, let me get
you some coffee.

That would be nice.

You know, six weeks,

and this is the first time

we've had to be alone.

Well, it's nice to
have you back, Ray.

I can't get over how
much you've changed

since the last time I saw you.

Well, I do have a
lot of work to do.

"The Parts of the Body."

Now, that's a typical
French lesson for you.

La tête, the head.

Le dos, the back.

Les pieds, the feet.

La main.

Le bras.

Le cou...

Would you like, uh,

milk and sugar with
your coffee, Ray?

Just sugar.

Thelma, you're so...

so lovely.

So sweet.

Oh, Ray, don't do
this. Don't do this, Ray!

Oh, come here.

Don't do that!

WILLONA: Hi, baby!

Hey, I'm glad you
got back so early.

I forgot to take the
blouse to match the thread.

Thelma?

Is something wrong?

Thelma?

What's happening?

Thelma was studying
her French lesson.

And I was teasing her. Oh.

Is that it, Thelma?

Well, Thelma?

Is it?

Ma, you heard Ray.

It was all in fun.

Excuse me.

Thelma, honey...

you know, if something happens,

you can't make it go away

by pretending it didn't.

Oh, Ma, Ray was
just fooling around.

You know how Ray
used to always tease me

when I was a little girl.

Yeah, but you're a woman now.

There's a big difference.

Well, nothing happened, Ma.

Like I told you,
nothing happened.

Thelma... you can
shuck some of the people

all of the time,

and you can shuck
all of the people

some of the time,

but you can't shuck your Mama

none of the time.

Now, what happened?

Nothing, Ma.

Nothing.

Nothing happened.

You don't want to hurt Willona.

Is that it?

Ma... Ma, you
heard what she said.

She loves him,

and they were getting
married again, right?

Ma, nothing happened.

Nothing.

[SHOUTING] Well, well, well!

Caught you two in the act.

Oh, J.J., you should
learn to knock.

Learn to knock? In my own house?

You know, Michael, I gotta
knock in my own house now.

Oh. Oh... Oh, Flo, listen.

We got to cut out.
I'll see you later.

Come on, baby. Let's go.

Willona. Huh?

Something happened
between those two.

Well, what do you...

What do you mean
"something happened"?

Thelma, come out here.

Willona.

Thelma won't say anything

because she doesn't
want to hurt you.

I don't want to see
you get hurt either.

Flo, hey, what are you
really talking about?

Come on, baby, let's go.

Willona, I've
got to talk to you.

Come on. Let's go, baby.

Willona, will you
listen? I am listening.

But what are you trying to say?

What I'm trying to say is

Ray has not changed one bit.

What? He's still a bum!

What the hell do
you mean, "bum"?

Hold it. Wait a minute.

Would you just stop this?

You don't break
up your friendship

over some creep like him.

What do you mean, "creep"?

Willona.

What?

I'm gonna tell you the truth.

What?

Ray, he came on
pretty strong with me.

Oh, no.

Yes, he did. He grabbed me.

Now, she's lying.

What you gonna believe,

some flaky kid or your old man?

Now, make up your mind.

You're going with me
or you're gonna stay.

Oh.

All right, Ray.

You get your nickel-slick
bones out of here.

Well, Ray, you
got the word. Split!

Willie... You heard
what my son said.

Hold it. Hold it!

Flo, please. Please!

J.J., you keep your
hands to yourself.

Ray is mine.

That's my sweet Willie.

Ray.

Oh, Willona.

I'm so sorry, Willona.

That's all right, baby.

Look, I'm glad you told me.

I'm just so sorry it
happened to you,

but if it wasn't you,

it would've been somebody
else sooner or later.

Hey, Willona.

Don't worry.

I mean, you're a
good-looking chick,

you know?

You don't need
a turkey like that.

You can get any turkey you want.

That's right, Willona.

There are a lot of
other fish in the sea.

Well, what I'm
trying to say is...

Honey, listen.

I know what
you're trying to say,

and there's also a
lot of other pebbles

on the beach.

Right, and lots of other
pebbles on the beach.

All right.

Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

Hello.

Jackson's Bakery?

This is Willona Woods.

You know the cake I ordered?

The one with the three
layers, the doves on the side,

silver bells, and the
bride and groom on top?

Well, yeah... That's the one.

I want to make one little,
tiny, small adjustment.

You know where
you were gonna write,

"Congratulations
Ray and Willona"?

Change that to,

"Happy Bar Mitzvah,
Stewart Goldberg."

Mm-hmm.

And I hope you can find a buyer.

I couldn't.

♪ Mmm ♪

♪ Just looking
Out of the window ♪

♪ Watching the asphalt grow ♪

♪ Thinking how It all
looks hand-me-down ♪

♪ Good Times, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Good Times ♪

♪ Keeping your
head Above water ♪

♪ Making a wave when you can ♪

♪ Temporary layoffs ♪

♪ Good Times ♪

♪ Easy credit rip-offs ♪

♪ Good times ♪

ANNOUNCER: Good Times is
videotaped in front of a studio audience.

♪ Good Times ♪♪