Good Times (1974–1979): Season 3, Episode 17 - J.J.'s Fiancee: Part 1 - full transcript

J.J. and his new girlfriend, Diana, plan to do more than just go to the prom ... they plan to get married - over their parents strong objections. But there's a dark secret that Diana is hiding from her groom-to-be: She's hooked on heroin.

♪ Good times Any time
you meet a payment ♪

♪ Good times Any
time you need a friend ♪

♪ Good times Any time
you're out from under ♪

♪ Not gettin' hassled
Not gettin' hustled ♪

♪ Keepin' your
head Above water ♪

♪ Makin' a wave when you can ♪

♪ Temporary layoffs Good times ♪

♪ Easy credit
rip-offs Good times ♪

♪ Scratchin' and
survivin' Good times ♪

♪ Hangin' in a chow
line Good times ♪

♪ Ain't we lucky we got 'em? ♪



♪ Good times ♪♪

Michael, it's getting late.
You better get ready for bed.

Oh, but Ma, it's Saturday night.
I wanna watch the horror movie.

Those movies aren't
good for you, Michael.

You know they
give you nightmares.

Ma, Michael's been sleeping
in the same bed with J.J.

for 10 years.

If that didn't give
him nightmares,

nothing will.

Michael, you heard
your mother. Get moving.

Oh, Daddy, but I wanna
watch The Wolfman.

You don't get to bed,

you gonna watch "The Beltman"

Yeah, but Daddy,
can't I just stay up



till his knuckles get hairy?

You want some
more coffee, Willona?

Oh, no thank you, honey.

Ooh, child! Did I
tell you the latest?

No, what?

There gonna be a
vacancy on the 7th floor.

Really, who's moving out?

Let me tell you what happened.

The husband in 703
was messing around

with the wife in 705, right?

Now, the wife in
703 heard about it,

told the husband in 705,

and 703 and 705
been fighting all week.

So who's moving out?

704. Can't stand
the noise no more.

Oh, Willona!

Willona, tell me something.

Where do you get
these stories from?

James, this is
the bona fide truth.

I got it from the horse's mouth.

821.

There aren't no 821.

You got the wrong end
of the horse, sweetie.

Got another bit of news for you.

What? In the laundry
room the other day, I saw...

When you gonna learn that
gossiping can be dangerous?

Me, gossiping? Me?

Now, James, gossiping is
when you pass stories around

without having the facts.

Well, what you
think you're doing?

I'm just spreading nasty rumors!

♪ Love, love Will
keep us together ♪

♪ Stay with me, baby Whenever ♪

♪ Some sweet-talking guy ♪
J.J.!

♪ Comes singing along ♪

♪ Don't mess around
We just got to be strong ♪

Oh, what are you doing?

♪ And stop... ♪

♪ Woo ♪
♪ Woo ♪

♪ 'Cause I'm Thinking of you ♪

♪ Stop... woo ♪
♪ Woo ♪

♪ 'Cause I really love you ♪

♪ Look in my heart
And let love... ♪♪

Ha, ha, ha!

Just sit down, Junior.

I'll have a doctor
here in a few minutes.

I ain't sick, Dad.
I'm in... amour.

Cupid has shot me
with his zip gun of love.

Who is it this time?

Oh, well, for the
past couple of months

he's been going out
with Diana Buchanan,

Fred and Lucille's daughter. Oh.

She has invited him
to her senior prom.

Hey, well, let's not forget

that it's also Thelma's
senior prom, right?

Right, and I'm taking Larry.

I'll be there with
sweet Diana...

the love of my life,
the girl of my dreams...

The weirdo of the neighborhood.

Now, Thelma, you
know Diana is a nice girl.

Ma, I know she's a nice girl,

but she's very
strange sometimes.

She's so moody.

That's because
she's a deep thinker.

That's why I love her.

She digs me for my mind,

not like the rest
of those chicks

who just want me for my... body.

Anybody who wants
you for your body

is out of their mind.

Look who's talking,

the cover girl of
Ugly Illustrated.

All right you two,
that's enough.

J.J... This is a first.

I can't remember you ever dating

the daughter of one
of your parent's friends.

Oh, Willona,

it's just one of those
accidents of love.

I was delivering an order
for the Chicken Shack,

and Diana opened
the door, and gwah-là!

I'll never forget that night.

Diana, the chicken,
and Kid... Dy-no-mite!

Junior, you been in love
every day that I can remember.

No, Dad, that's not
true. Diana's different.

Every time I see her,

my legs shake, my knees buckle,

I breaks out into a cold sweat.

That ain't love,
J.J. That's the flu.

Admit it, J.J., you fall in love

with every girl you take out.

That's not true.

Oh, no, what about Delilah?

I guess you could
say that, uh...

And then what about Myrna?

Well, sometimes the thing...

Yeah, and Patty and
Gloria and Susan.

And Maryann and
Nancy and Bertha.

It was a very good
year, wasn't it?

But Diana's different.

All those other chicks
were just brief encounters,

passing ships in the night.

The others may have
been passing ships

in the night,

but Bertha looked
more like a supertanker.

But Ma, I thought
you would understand.

Diana and me are serious.

Well, you have been
going out with her

longer than any of the others.

Maybe it is serious.

Uh-uh, Flo, if it was serious,

J.J. would have bought
her a bracelet by now.

What?

Oh, yeah. It began
with delectable Delilah.

You remember her, mm-hmm.

Well, they came into
the boutique, you know,

and bought one of
those charm bracelets,

had it engraved.

"To Delilah, with all my heart.

Love, J."

J.?

Uh-huh, engraving
costs 15 cent per letter,

and Casanova ran out of dough.

Oh, but he's gotten, uh...

12 or 13 of the
same kind of bracelet

for different girls.

J.J...

you know if all those
girls and all those bracelets

ever wind up in the same
room at the same time,

they gonna do some
engraving for you:

"J.J. Evans, rest in peace."

Now that I said my little
sale, I'm gonna go on home.

Okay, Willona.

- I'll see y'all later.
- Okay.

Well, I ain't buying
Diana a bracelet.

I'm buying her something else.

What? A ring.

You want to run
that by me again?

An engagement ring.

Family, are y'all
ready for this?

Today I asked Diana to
marry me, and she said yes.

Lord have mercy.

You want to run
that by me again?!

Calm down, Dad.

It's one of those
things of nature.

I mean, everybody leaves home

sooner or later.

Birds do, fish do.

Even turkeys do!

J.J... with news like that,

why didn't you tell us
as soon as you came in?

Well, I thought I better
break it to you gently.

Kind of... glide over it,

kind of ease around
it, kind of ooze by it.

Well, you better slide off it.

You're too young to even think

about getting married.

But, Ma, when you love somebody,

and you can't think
of anything else,

and you're thinking of them
every minute of the day,

what else is there to think of?

You better not be
doing that either.

J.J., your daddy and I feel
the same way about this.

You are too young
to get married.

But Ma, we're in love.
What more do we need?

We're in the state of Illinois.

Till you turn 21, you
need our permission,

and Junior, you ain't
going to get it. But, Dad!

You'll just have to wait.
Now, if it's love, it will keep.

But Ma... It's not fair.

I mean, how come I can get

a driver's license when I'm 16,

but can't get a marriage license

till I'm 21?

Because the state
would rather have you

driving a lemon
than marrying one.

But, Dad. Diana's not a lemon.

The law is to
protect her, dummy.

You stay out of
this, burlap-brain.

I stood up for you

when you wanted to get engaged

to old what's-his-name.

Uh, Larry's got a good job,

but you can't support a
wife delivering chicken.

Tell that to Colonel Sanders.

Look, J.J.,

it's not that we have
anything against Diana.

We know she comes
from a nice family,

but we also know that
you are not mature enough

to handle what
you'll be getting into.

But, Ma, I invited her
and her parents over here

tomorrow night.

Couldn't we all talk about this?

Then y'all can
make your decision.

Look here, Junior,

I don't care if Fred and Lucille

talked their head off,
my answer's still no.

So is mine, honey.

Yeah, J.J., I'm against it too.

What you got to do with this?

J.J., if you and
Diana get married,

how the three of us
gonna fit on that bed?

Ma, you finished yet?

Oh, relax, Thelma.

The prom isn't
until tomorrow night.

Yeah, but I can't
wait to try it on!

Thelma!

I told you to take it easy

on that Head and Shoulders.

J.J., will you get out of here.

Junior, did you get
your tuxedo rented

for tomorrow night yet?

I sure did, Dad.

But I can't pick it up
till the very last minute.

I got it rented for 24
hours or 5000 boogies,

whichever comes first.

Oh, Ma, I'm so excited!

Well... it isn't every day

my little girl goes
to her senior prom.

Hey, Ma, when the
Buchanans get here,

can we use the fancy china,

the one we got with
the Green Stamps?

J.J., we don't have
to put on no fancy airs

for the Buchanans.

Yeah, especially for a
dude that owes me $20.

James, that's been so long ago.

Can't you just forget about it?

All right, baby, I'll forget it.

I ain't gonna mention
it no more. Good.

Sucker owes me $20.

Well, we have more
important things

to think about
for tonight, right?

That's right,

and, Dad, when the
Buchanans get here,

you will talk to
them, won't you?

Sure, Junior, I
ain't got nothing

against talking to them.

Good.

I have got something
against listening to them.

Why, James?

Because, Florida,
they just trying

to unload their
daughter off on our son.

Girls' parents always
trying to do that.

Hey, Daddy. Hmm?

Who we gonna
unload old Thelma on?

Uh, Michael, why
don't you shut up

and finish the dishes.

Oh, Thelma, take
this in the back.

Okay, Mama. J.J.: I'll get it.

No, sweetheart, I'll do it.

Hello, Diana! Come on in.

Hi! Hello.

Florida! Hey, J.J.!

Diana!

Mm, it's been so long
since I've seen you.

Yeah, since yesterday.

Girl, isn't this something
after all these years?

Who'd have thought that our kids

would end up going together?

Ain't it something?

Yeah.

You kids wouldn't remember it,
but when you were 3 years old,

you spent a lot of
time in the playground.

I remember you owe me $20.

Thelma,

will you take these
coats into the bedroom.

Okay, Ma. Oh, would you
take my purse too, honey.

Oh, Mrs. Buchanan,
this is a beautiful bag.

Well, thank you.
Diana got it for me.

She's got good
taste in purses too.

Oh, J.J.

Hey, listen, why
don't we all sit down.

Come on. LUCILLE: Thank you.

Thank you.

Oh, it's so seldom
we get together, girl.

James, why don't
you pull up a chair.

No thank you, baby.

I'm comfortable
right where I am.

Oh, look, Fred.

This is almost like the
dish that Mother gave us.

Mm-hmm. Ours was stolen.

We've had so many
robberies lately.

Girl, everything that isn't
nailed down in our apartment

gets ripped off.

It's the same thing
in our building.

Girl, and it's not just...

Why can't we stop
all this small talk

and get down to business here?

Thelma, will you take Michael
to Willona's for a little while?

Oh, Mama, you know you're
not preparing me very well

for real life. What did you say?

The only thing I'm gonna
be good at is leaving rooms.

Take your... Watch it!

Now, look, Fred.

There ain't no way in the world
these kids going to get married.

It's wrong. I absolutely agree.

Now, look, man.

Don't argue with me about it
because I done made up... Huh?

It's a bad idea, and
I've been against it

from the start.

You know something, Fred,

it's a pleasure talking
to a sensible man.

The whole thing is crazy.
I mean, J.J.'s a nice kid...

but a husband?

Get serious.

Oh, now, wait a minute.

What the hell's that
supposed to mean?

Yeah, what's that
supposed to mean?

Oh, come on. Look at him.

We were hoping for someone
a little more solid for Diana.

J.J.'s too young
and irresponsible.

Hey, wait a minute, now, Fred.

Don't go telling me my son ain't
good enough for your daughter.

I mean, he got a good
future in front of him.

He knows where he's going.

Any girl would be
lucky to catch him.

Does that mean we have
your permission to get married?

Are you out of your mind?

You're too young
and irresponsible.

That's what I just said!

But that's not for you to say.

Well, what difference
does it make who says it?

It makes a lot of difference!

Well, what are you
yelling at me for?

Because he owes me $20.

Can I please say something?

No! No! No!

Look, what are we all
yelling and shouting about?

We all know that Diana and J.J.

are not gonna
get married, right?

Right.

But, Ma.

I don't think
it's fair for y'all

to make a decision
about our future

without us having a
word to say about it.

Mrs. Evans, we want to get
married because we're in love,

and what's wrong with that?

Nothing.

Until the rent comes due.

But Ma, I got a good job.

I'll be a great breadwinner.

Junior, you got to bring home
the whole loaf, not just crumbs.

But I have my job at
the department store too.

We can make it.

And that's not even
counting my paintings,

because once they
start selling, watch out!

We be living on the
corner of Easy Street

and Got-It-Made Boulevard.

Well, it's not just the money.

Neither one of you have
enough experience to know

whether or not you're
making the right decision.

But you're our parents,

and you'll never
think we're ready.

That's not true, Diana.

Now, we'll give
J.J. our permission

as soon as we think
he's mature enough

to handle this.

When will that be?

In about 20 years.

But Dad! There
ain't no buts, Junior.

No permission, no
marriage. That's it.

I'm with James.
It will never work.

But Mr. Buchanan!

It's no use, J.J.

But Diana!

Son, I think she's right.

But Ma!

I'll get the coats.

But... anybody!

Florida, I know this
is hard on the kids,

but it's for the best.

Well, maybe we can
help them out a little.

Suppose you and
Fred bring Diana over

before the prom,

and then we'll throw
a little party for them.

Oh, that'll be wonderful.

I think so.

J.J., what's going on?

What are we doing here?

I'm gonna get you a ring. When
do you want to get married?

But you heard our
parents last night.

There's no way they're
gonna let us get married.

Don't ever say that.
There's always a way.

And fortunately,
you're dealing with...

Captain Smarts.

You know, I ain't just
another pretty face.

I know.

But really, J.J., I just can't

see them changing
their minds, can you?

Are you kidding?

I stayed up all last
night thinking of ways

to get their permission.

I went through every
plan, every clever idea,

every little detail!

Hey, that's great. So
how we gonna do it?

Beats me.

But I did think of a
way to get married

without their permission.

In Indiana, you don't have
be but 18 to get married.

Diana, we're going to elope.

Elope?! J.J., we can't elope.

Why not?

It will be just like a
big family wedding,

except we won't
invite the family.

Yeah, but running
away. That's pretty wild.

Well, no, it's not.
People do it all the time.

All I'll do is get a ladder,
climb up to your window,

and it will be bon voy-a-gee!

Yeah, well, that ladder
better be on a fire truck.

You know I live
on the 20th floor.

Okay, forget the ladder.
We'll elope by elevator.

Excuse me, sir.

Would you like to see
something in a ring?

Uh, yes.

Uh... her finger.

Yeah, we'd like to
buy a diamond ring.

How much did you want to spend?

Oh, the sky's the limit.

Oh... now this one is
very nice. Only $1500.

Uh... Could we
lose a little altitude?

Exactly how much altitude?

Uh, you ever heard
of Death Valley?

J.J., don't you think we ought

to talk about this some more?

I mean, eloping
is a serious thing.

Diana, I am serious.

I mean, I know I
joke around a lot,

but I do love you,

and I can't wait two
years to marry you.

I love you too, but
this, it's so sudden.

Diana, there's no other way.

But there must be
some other way.

Are we buying a ring or
watching a soap opera?

Oh, uh, pardon us.

Where were we?

Death Valley.

Now you just tell me how much

you want to spend,

we have a large selection
in every price range.

Yeah, where do you
keep your rings under $25?

In the gumball machine.

Now, this is our
least expensive ring.

Only $185.

Well, Diana, how do you like it?

Oh, it's beautiful, J.J.,

but we really gotta
think about our parents.

This is really gonna hurt them.

All right, Diana, we'll
give them one last chance.

Tonight we all gonna be
together before the prom, right?

Mm-hmm.

Well, we either tell them
we're gonna get married

or we don't care what they say,

how they feel, or
what they think.

You're gonna say
that to your father?

No, you are.

No, just jiving, just
jiving. I'll tell them.

Well, Diana...
how do you like it?

It's beautiful.

Uh, we'll take it!

Fine, now, how will
you be paying for this?

Painfully.

You know, we do have
an easy payment plan here.

Ten dollars down,
10 dollars a month.

And this explains the terms.

I'll handle this.

You know, you're
making a wise investment.

Like they say,
"Diamonds are forever."

And so are these payments.

Well, if you just
step over here,

I'll help you fill out
the credit application.

J.J... I love you.

You're the greatest thing
that's ever happened to me.

I know.

Ma, I hate washing dishes.

Daddy, Thelma and
J.J. get allowance.

I think I should get something

for doing the dishes.

You do get something.

What?

Dinner.

Oh! Hey, dishes,
what's happening, baby?

How are you doin'?

Thelma, J.J., hurry up.

The Buchanans will
be here any minute.

Well, baby, I think I'm all set

to take them prom pictures now.

Good, good.

Well, stand back and behold.

You're all looking
at the black Liberace.

Now, Junior,

if you just had
you a rented body

to go with that rented
tux, you'd be all set.

Oh, James.

Don't you let your
daddy kid you, J.J.

You look just great.

Thanks, Ma. Just
jiving you, Junior.

Just jiving you.

Now, hold it there.
Let me get this picture.

Give me some cheese.

All right.

Hey, did anybody see my gloves?

I can't find them anywhere.

Honey, they're in
the top drawer...

Thelma... Oh!

Well, baby girl, you
look absolutely beautiful.

Oh, thank you, Daddy.

Look at this...

Let me take this picture
with you and your brother.

Oh, let's not get
carried away now.

Shut up and give me some cheese.

Cheese. All right.

Hey, Dad, you
missed my good side.

Naturally. You don't have one.

Diana, you look just great!

Thank you, Mrs.
Evans. Oh, Lucille.

Diana, you look so cute!

Oh, thank you, Thelma.

Diana... you look fantastic.

Diana, what's wrong?

Oh, nothing, J.J.
Ooh, you look so fine.

Well, you know. What can I say?

Junior, hold it right there.

Let me get this picture.

All right, kids.

You know something, James...

We got the two prettiest girls

at the prom right here.

Oh, thanks, Mr. Buchanan.

I'll drink to that, man.

And I'll join you.

It's hard to believe

my baby girl is graduating

from high school.

Oh, they grow up on us, Florida.

They sure do.

Hey, Michael. Where'd
you put Diana's corsage?

In the refrigerator,
next to the ribs.

Well, get it out of there

before you get some
barbecue sauce on it.

Okay, J.J.

Thelma, your dress
is beautiful. Thank you.

Well, you got the ring?

Uh-huh.

Might as well put it on.

Oh, it's so beautiful, J.J.

Well, we might as
well tell them. Uh-huh.

Uh, Ma, Dad, parents...

Uh, we got an
announcement to make.

What kind of
announcement, Junior?

We got news here.

All right, J.J.,
what kind of news?

Well, me and Diana
love each other.

That ain't no news.

And we want your
permission to get married.

That ain't no news either.

And if you don't give
us your permission,

we're gonna run away
and get married anyway.

We already got the ring.

Now, that's news.

Bad news.

Real bad news.

J.J., you wouldn't,
I told you...

We mean it, Mama.

We mean it!

We do. We mean it, we do.

Yeah, well, if you
do... You do, huh?

Well, if you do,
then Diana here's

gonna be going to two
ceremonies in the same day.

Huh? Hmm?

Her wedding and your funeral.

And I'm gonna be
one of pallbearers.

My daughter ain't eloping
with no bony Romeo.

But Daddy!

You be quiet. You
ain't going nowhere.

But Mama, you said
we could talk about it!

You heard what your Daddy said.

You ain't going
nowhere. No, it's not fair.

What's wrong with you?

Now, you ain't going
nowhere either, Junior.

Wait a minute, now.
There's no need to yell.

What you talking about, Florida?

These kids can't march in here
and tell us what they gonna do.

You're right.

But Dad!

Ain't no buts, Junior.

I ain't playing any more
games with you now.

Dad, I ain't playing
no games either,

and I ain't backing down.

Well, you ain't gonna
have to back down.

You might get knocked down.

I'm sick of it! I'm sick of it!

What you talking about?

We wanna get married.

♪ Mm-mm-mm ♪

♪ Just lookin' Out
of the window ♪

♪ Watching the asphalt grow ♪

♪ Thinkin' how It all
looks hand-me-down ♪

♪ Good times Good times ♪

♪ Keepin' your
head Above water ♪

♪ Makin' a wave When you can ♪

♪ Temporary layoffs Good times ♪

Good Times is recorded on tape

before a live audience.

♪ Ain't we lucky we got 'em? ♪

♪ Good times ♪♪