Good Times (1974–1979): Season 2, Episode 17 - The Family Business - full transcript

♪ Good times Any time
you meet a payment ♪

♪ Good times Any
time you need a friend ♪

♪ Good times Any time
you're out from under ♪

♪ Not gettin' hassled
Not gettin' hustled ♪

♪ Keepin' your
head Above water ♪

♪ Makin' a wave when you can ♪

♪ Temporary layoffs Good times ♪

♪ Easy credit
ripoffs Good times ♪

♪ Scratchin' and
survivin' Good times ♪

♪ Hangin' in a chow
line Good times ♪

♪ Ain't we lucky we got 'em ♪



♪ Good times ♪♪

Let's see, what
should I paint today?

I think I'll paint a
family portrait... yeah!

Michael studying,
Dad fixing the radio,

and Mom baking
biscuits... the whole family.

Hey, what about me?

I said I wanted to
paint a family portrait,

not a horror picture.

Everything you paint
is a horror picture.

Oh, yeah? Yeah!

Oh, yeah? Yeah!

Schooling sure has
improved their vocabulary,

hasn't it, James?

Oh, yeah.



Oh, James.

I got it.

Hi, Mr. Bookman.

Hi, Michael.

Hey, I was just checking
the light bulbs out there

and I heard somebody
yelling in here.

It was nothing,
Mr. Bookman, nothing.

Hey man, you know me,

I don't mean to
make any trouble.

Yeah, we know.

Hey, but you know
excessive noise is prohibited.

Boy, it sure broke my heart
to have to evict the Andersons

because of that.

But that's clause
11 of your lease...

But you folks know
about that clause?

That's the "Oh yeah" clause.

Mm-mm. Do I smell biscuits?

I suppose you would want some?

Nah, I couldn't, really.

Oh, maybe a few...
Make it a dozen.

Did you say a dozen?

That'll be enough. Oh.

Hi, y'all.

Hey, Willona. Hi, Willona.

Hi, Ms. Woods.

Hi, Mr. Booger.

That's Bookman.

Here you are.

Hey, that sure is
sweet of you, Thelma.

See you guys later.

Oh, and, you know,
about the noise,

you know me, I don't
like to make no trouble...

Forget it.

What did the Gestapo
of the ghetto want?

He must have ripped off
a chicken in apartment 12,

because he wanted
some hot biscuits

to go along with it.

Honey, I'm hip to that routine.

You know, the other day,

I had a couple of
flies in my apartment,

and he warned me about no pets.

And that little visit cost me

a six-pack of beer
and two beef jerkys.

You know, before that
fat rascal got this job,

he didn't weigh but 120 pounds.

Oh, James.

Hey, how's it coming, James?

I'm almost finished, Willona.

If you can fix that
old radio of mine,

you are the electronic
genius of all time.

Willona, we had an old toaster,
and the toast never popped up,

but James fixed it.

Yeah, once Dad fixed it.
The toast popped up so good,

we had to go up on
the ceiling and butter it.

Hey, get out of the way!

You seen me coming through here!

All right, that's
enough of that now.

That's enough!

Well, all I know is I
miss this radio of mine,

especially that
all-night disc jockey,

Get Down Brown.

That dude keeps
you jumping, whoo!

Lookee here, lookee here,
this is Get Down Brown,

moving and grooving
and jumping around!

Splattering the platters
of rhythm and blues

for a funky selection
of grooves for you too.

Brought to you by Big
Bubba's Barbeque Beef

and Midtown Merchandise Mart...

The mart that's smart
and you only pay part.

And... Sadie's Funeral Parlor...

The funeral parlor
that really digs you...

And we mean dig!

Girl, you sound just like him.

Hey, yeah?

I'm going to play you a
tune that's groovy and fine

and stone guaranteed
to blow your mind!

There's a hole in my mattress,
so I'll see you in the spring!

Well, I think you'll be able
to hear the real Mr. Brown

in a minute,

because I believe I
got this thing fixed.

Oh, you're jiving. Turn it on.

I don't hear nothing, James.

That's it for the local news.

He got it.

Now on the national front.

In Washington
tonight, President Ford

speaking on the increase
in unemployment, said...

Absolutely nothing.

There you go, Willona.

You're a stone genius.

Here, how much do I owe you?

Oh, no way, no way, Willona.

Well, James, if I
took it to a store,

they would charge me.

Look, pretend that you
are a department store,

and I am a customer.

Okay, treat me like
you treat a customer.

You sure about that?

On second thought, I deserve
a better fate than that, huh?

Hey Dad, since you're
so good with electronics,

how come our TV don't
work any better than it does.

Your daddy is good
at fixing things, J.J.

Nobody said nothing
about raising the dead.

Oh, come on, now.

Oh, come on, now.

I ain't going to tell
you all no more now!

Daddy, you keep just
about everything we own

in working order.

Hey James, that's right.

And with all the talent
you got in your hands,

you should be in
business for yourself.

Yeah, you should
open a massage parlor.

Well, I was thinking
of a fix-it shop.

Hey, that's a
fantastic idea, James.

You could do that.

A fix-it shop?

Yeah, Ma, that's a great idea.

Everybody I know has a
TV set that breaks down...

Radios, toasters, everything,
it's planned that way.

Honey, you have got that right.

You know I had a car once,

and the warranty and the motor
both ran out at the same time.

Yeah. And with all
the chicks I know,

I could lead you

to a small fortune
in busted hot combs.

Ooh, James, now, you
know we've always dreamed

that some day

you would own your own business.

Maybe this is the
way to get it started.

You know I read an article

where Jessie Jackson

said more Blacks should
have businesses of their own.

That's right, Michael.
That's exactly what he said.

How would you know?

You don't read
nothing but the walls.

James, look, you can make it.

Why don't you give it
a try? You fixed that.

What you all talking about?

I ain't got no place
to run no business.

The main thing is

I ain't got what it takes
to make money in the end,

and that's money
in the beginning.

We'll borrow it from the bank.

Hey, yeah.

Oh yeah, right, just
like that, huh baby?

I can see me going
down to the bank,

saying, "Hey, I
need a few thousand.

Just give it to me." Fat chance.

Oh, Dad, you got
the wrong attitude.

You got to think big!

Look at here, we have a
financial genius in the house.

For once, you are
precisely right, little sister.

You are looking
at the only person

that took Henrietta out
for a night on the town

with exactly $1.00.

Purchased and
consumed two Big Macs,

two order of fries,
two strawberry shakes,

saw a double feature

while nibbling on a
jumbo giant Snicker's bar,

and watching
Blackula Bites Boston,

and still came
home with 37 cents

jingling in my jeans.

You did all that, and
still had change left over?

How'd you do it, J.J.?

Well, I owe Henrietta
five and a quarter, but...

I go out big. You
got to think big!

What you all talking about?

I mean this would be

the wrong time to open a
business, prices going up,

people getting laid off.

No, this would be hell of
a time to open a business.

James, this may be just
the time to open a business.

People ain't buying nothing new,

so they've got to fix
what they already have.

And you'd be your
own boss, Daddy.

Yeah, Dad, and
if you goofed off,

the only one that could fire you

would be you.

And you wouldn't do that,

because you
wouldn't stand for that.

Because you are you, and...

And you wouldn't...

You would never go for that.

No, sir.

Well, it sounded good
when it was in my head,

but it lost something when
it came out of my mouth.

Doesn't everything?

You know something,
baby, you may be right,

this might be the right
time to go into business.

Yeah.

Boy, wouldn't that be something?

Running my own business.

Our business, James.

Yeah.

We're all in it together...

It'll be Evans & Evans.
That's right, baby.

And son.

And son. And daughter.

And friend.

Yeah!

I don't know,
baby, I don't know.

You know, maybe I do
need a few thousand dollars

to get this shop opened.

So ask them for it.

Florida, there ain't
no way in the world

them people gonna give
me that kind of money.

Now, now, now, James,
that ain't no way to think.

You've got to think positive.

You're right, baby.

I'll think positive. Good.

I'm positive there ain't
no way in the world

them people gonna give
me that kind of money.

You know, all of
this business stuff

sounded good at
the house, Florida,

but I don't like
this borrowing stuff.

I just don't like it.

James, stop worrying.

Like J.J. said...
Like J.J. said?

Well, yeah.

If you want to borrow
money from the bank,

you gotta act big,

like you're doing them a favor,

like you don't even
need their money.

That's the way the
big businessmen do it.

Yeah. I guess
you're right, baby.

I mean, if I'm going to
be a big businessman,

I might as well start
acting like one, huh?

There you go.

Would you come in, please?

Oh, thank you.

I'm Mr. Dawson.

Evans, James Evans.

This is my wife and
business associate, Florida.

How do you do?

We don't need your
money, but we'll take 2,000.

Won't you sit down?

Thank you.

Now, you say you'd like $2,000?

Right.

Have you ever borrowed any
money from us or any other bank?

No. We've never borrowed
any money from anybody...

But, we don't owe
nobody nothing, either.

That's right.

Oh, that's bad, that's bad.

You see, if you had borrowed,

then you would have
established a line of credit.

This way, we don't know
if you can pay it back.

Oh, well, look,
that's very simple.

You lend me 2,000,

I give it right back to you,

then you know I'm
good for the 2,000,

so you lend it right back to me.

Very ingenious Mr. Evans,

but I think we need something
a little more concrete.

Now, let's go over your assets.

Yeah, let's go over my assets.

What do you own?

Real estate, stock, bonds,
anything, you name it.

You name it and we ain't got it.

Well, look, folks, I'd
like to help you out,

but we can't loan you money
unless you have collateral.

Well, I know that, man,

but how am I going
to get the collateral

unless you make me the loan?

Do you have someone
who would co-sign for you?

Yeah, baby, Willy Washington.

Now, Willy would
cosign for me in a minute.

Yeah, I know Willy would.

Willy Washington.

Good. What's is
financial condition?

Oh, hell, he owes me $12.00.

Well, I sympathize with you
very much, Mr. and Mrs. Evans,

but you see, you have to
understand the banking system.

You see, we can't loan you money

unless we know
we can get it back.

We ourselves borrow money
from the Federal Reserve,

the Federal Reserve
gets their money

from the government,

the government gets their
money from the people.

Hey, well, in that case,

all I'm doing ia
borrowing my own money.

Not so loud, Mr. Evans,

you may give the
whole system away.

Well, I'm sorry, there's
nothing we can do.

Well, Thelma, how you like it?

Hey, that's great.

Looks professional, doesn't it?

Uh-huh.

And you ain't seen nothing yet.

That's beautiful, except
you made a mistake.

Where?

It should read Evans
& Evans and Fool.

I didn't make a mistake,
Thelma. I left you out on purpose.

What do you mean you
left me out on purpose?

That's right, I didn't
have no room down here

for none of that nonsense.

You don't have no
room... There's room.

Hey, Ma and Sad.
Good thing ya'll here.

How ya'll like
it? Tear it up, J.J.

We won't be needing that.

The bank turned us down.

Oh.

Ma, how could they?

They did it, Thelma.

One more good
idea that didn't work...

Wait, now wait a minute,
baby. Hold it, hold it.

Now, you the one got me
fired up about this business stuff

in the first place.

Now, just because the
bank turned us down,

that don't mean it's the end.

Well, James, we
ain't got no money.

How can we rent a store?

Who said we got to rent a store?

I mean it's supposed to
be a family business, right?

So why can't we conduct a
family business right here?

Oh, you know we can't
run no business here.

It's against the lease.

And you know that
old snoopy Bookman,

he's always on top
of us like white on rice.

Yeah, but if we just make sure

old snoopy Bookman don't
come up here for a while.

By that time, maybe
I'll have enough money

to rent my own store.

If that one hits, hell,
I'll rent another one,

and another one,
and another one.

Florida, this could be the start

of a whole chain
of fix-it shops.

All I need

is just my first
thing to fix, that's all.

Yeah, and look at
Colonel Sanders...

He only started out
with one chicken.

Look at all this
business we got, Florida.

Everything's going
along just right.

It won't be long before
we have our own store.

Well, it can't be too soon.

I'm getting a little
bit nervous, James,

in all of this secrecy.

It's like selling booze
during prohibition,

only instead of a speakeasy,

we got a fix-easy.

Yeah, that's the right
signal. Get that one.

Hey, Daddy, we got some
more things for you to fix.

All right.

Yeah, we're doing so
much door-to-door business,

we're leaving the
Avon lady in the dust.

Yeah, I got an eggbeater

from Mrs. Watson
on the sixth floor

and an iron from Mrs.
Stateman on the third.

All right.

And from the 10th floor...

Mr. Garrett's alarm clock.

He says he wants it
back by Wednesday

so he can get up on time

to collect his
unemployment insurance.

You didn't run into
Mr. Bookman, did you?

We did, but he didn't
suspect nothing.

It won't be long before
we'll be able to afford

our own pick-up service.

And wait a minute, Dad.

That ain't all I
got for you to fix.

Where in the world
did you get that?

From old Mrs. Vincent.

She says her heating pad
doesn't heat up like it used to.

Neither does old Mrs. Vincent.

I'll get it.

Wait, wait, wait!
That's the wrong signal.

Yeah, cover this stuff up.

Yeah, just a
minute, just a minute.

Michael. Michael.

That was the wrong signal.

Mama, it's hard to
remember the right signal

when you gotta
go to the bathroom.

Well, let's clear the deck
and get back to action.

Looks like Mr. Fix-it's
got a roll going here.

James, you look tired.

Between this and that
job down at Brady's,

you must be worn out.

Honey, why don't
you take a little rest?

After a while, baby.

I got a pile of
stuff here to finish

and it don't pay to miss
a promised delivery date.

I wish the stork had missed
the delivery date on Thelma.

Yeah?

Well, they sure missed yours...

You was delivered by a buzzard.

A buzzard?

You got some nerve,
you old ostrich head.

All right now, all right now...

Didn't I say all right?

I'm sorry, Dad.

What can the son
of Evans and Son

do to help Evans?

Well, you can deliver that
toaster to Mrs. Jackson.

Okay, then we're going to
have a slight problem, dad.

How come?

I can't put this under my hat.

Well, put it in a
shopping bag, J.J.

And don't forget, Mrs. Jackson

is on our easy-payment plan...

One half on delivery and
50 cents a week, okay?

You know, Daddy, we should
give one of those receipt pads

so that when you
deliver things to people,

they can sign for them.

Oh, we'll get around
to that, Michael.

We ain't got quite
that organized yet.

That's all right.
You can get it, J.J.

Boy, that knock is
getting so popular,

pretty soon, it's going
to be in the top 40.

If you want your
stuff repaired right,

bring it to the father
of Kid Dyn-o-mite.

I didn't say "repair."

What I said was
"upstair", "Au contraire".

No need for
anybody to get upset,

I just wanted to find out

if the Evans family
was doing fine.

Hey, what have we got here?

Oh, I just picked
the right curtain

on Let's Make a Deal.

Hey, man, you know me,

I don't like to make
trouble, you know?

I'm on your side all the way.

However, it clearly
states in clause 11

that it's unlawful to
use these premises

for commercial purposes.

Well, what you want now, man?

We fresh out of
biscuits, balloon belly.

As a matter of fact, I
don't want anything.

I come here to
give you something.

To give us something?

Yeah, I have a few things
that need some minor repairs...

A tea kettle and iron.

And if I don't?

Do you know how cold it gets
in the park this time of year?

Yeah, bring them in.

Hey, it's nice of you
to make the offer.

Hey, boy, I always said,
you guys are nice tenants.

Get on out of here.

James, honey, we're being taken.

I know that, baby,

but don't worry about
it, I can handle him.

We've come too far to be
stopped by that ham hock.

James?

James?

Oh, morning baby.

Honey, didn't you get any sleep?

No, baby.

I've got a pile of
stuff here to finish

for fat-back Bookman.

It seems like soon as
I finish one pile of stuff,

he brings in another one.

An iron and a teakettle, huh?

James, he is wearing you down.

He brought you
everything he got,

now he's got you fixing
things for his relatives.

Yeah, you're right, baby.

I'm so busy
working on this stuff,

I ain't even got time

to take care of my
paying customers.

Damn!

Hey, what's going on here?

Sorry, kids.

I didn't mean to
wake you all up.

Oh, that's all right.

The chick I was dreaming
about was getting away anyway.

Hey, what's going
on? What's happening?

Your daddy is overworked,
that's what's going on.

Mr. Bookman brought
another load of stuff

in here last night.

Oh, James, you can't
keep going on like this,

you're falling off your feet.

Yeah, I know, baby,

but how much more
stuff can he bring in here?

He got to run out of
relatives some time.

Well, I guess he's discovered
a couple of long lost uncles.

Well, this is it this time.

This is the final straw.

I've had it with this guy.

I'm going to tell this Bookman
exactly where to get off!

This old jive-time turkey,
blood sucking us like that.

It's going to be it for him.

Hello Mr. Bookman.
How you doing?

Morning. Morning.

Hey, partner, I brought
you some more stuff.

You must have one hell
of a family, huh, partner.

This ain't family.

I told all of my friends

about the good work
you've been doing.

I'm going to bring
some more later.

Now hold it,
Bookman. That rips it.

You find yourself
another donkey,

because I ain't dealing
no more with you, man.

And I mean that, no more.

Hey, wait a minute, Evans.

No, you wait a minute, hog head.

See, I can see what
kind of dude you are.

You ain't going to be satisfied

until I done fix everything
that's broke in Chicago,

including Mayor Daly's
electric toothbrush.

Plus, I got the feeling

you're lining your
pockets with my work.

Hey, that's a terrible
thing to accuse me of.

Well, it's the truth, ain't it?

Yeah.

I'm gonna to run
you through that door

and I ain't gonna charge

to fix the hole you gonna make.

Man, cool it, brother,

or you and your whole
family will be cooling it outside.

You know, I'm afraid I'm
going to have to report you

for violation of... Clause 11?

Go right ahead,

and we'll tell the manager
how you've been bleeding us.

Who'd believe you?
You don't have any proof.

Yeah, well I don't care, man.

Now, if you're gonna
report us, report us,

and if you gonna
evict us, evict us.

Daddy.

Michael, stay out of this.

And I got something else
to tell you, Buffalo Butt,

this family don't get on
their knees to nobody.

Daddy...

Michael, I done told
you now, stay out of this.

Now, if you gonna go down
to the manager's office greasy,

slide on down
there and report it.

Daddy, I have proof.

Michael, stay... You got proof?

Proof of what?

Proof that he's been
getting things fixed here.

How, baby, how?

Well, the other day,
when I was here by myself,

Mr. Bookman came by
to pick up a few things.

I didn't know what to do,

so I asked him to sign
a receipt, and he did.

What do you mean?
It's a silly baseball card,

and I was only going
along with the kid.

Hey, you didn't keep
it, did you, little fella?

I sure did, Mr. Buffalo.

Bookman, Bookman.

Here, Daddy.

I'll take that, Hocks.

"Received, two kettles
and an electric blanket."

Signed "Mr. Bookman."

Well, how does that
grab you, Mr. Bookman?

Well, Clause 11 ain't
the only clause ever.

Hey, look, Evans,

why don't you
close your business

and I'll close mine,

we'll have, like, a
Mexican standoff.

All right!

All right, I want you to
get all this stuff in here

that you brought,
take it on out of here,

and you gonna
need a truck to do it.

Sure. Hey, you know me, I don't
like to make any trouble, man.

Hey, wait a minute,
wait a minute.

You don't want to leave
without your TV, do you?

I got it all fixed up
and waiting for you.

Hey, I'm not
going to pay for it.

Oh, that's all right.

This one's on the
house, brother.

Hey, you know, you all right.

I'll be back to get
the rest of my stuff.

Yeah, you do that.

Yeah, and get out of here.

Here, Dad.

Thanks, Thelma.

James, how could you be smiling

about fixing his
TV, and for nothing?

Very simple, baby,

that TV ain't going to work
too good without these tubes.

♪ Just lookin' Out
of the window ♪

♪ Watchin' the asphalt grow ♪

♪ Thinkin' how it all
Looks hand-me-down ♪

♪ Good times, good times ♪

♪ Keepin' your
head Above water ♪

♪ Makin' a wave when you can ♪

♪ Temporary layoffs ♪

♪ Good times ♪

Good Times is recorded on
tape before a live audience.

♪ Ain't we lucky we got 'em? ♪

♪ Good times ♪♪