Good Times (1974–1979): Season 2, Episode 12 - The Windfall - full transcript

♪ Good times Any time
you meet a payment ♪

♪ Good times Any
time you need a friend ♪

♪ Good times Any time
you're out from under ♪

♪ Not gettin' hassled
Not gettin' hustled ♪

♪ Keepin' your
head Above water ♪

♪ Makin' a wave when you can ♪

♪ Temporary layoffs Good times ♪

♪ Easy credit
ripoffs Good times ♪

♪ Scratchin' and
survivin' Good times ♪

♪ Hangin' in a chow
line Good times ♪

♪ Ain't we lucky we got 'em ♪



♪ Good times ♪♪

Michael, get down from there.

J.J., honey, it isn't
time for the news yet.

You've still got 10 minutes.

Yeah, Ma, but you
know how long it takes

for this set to warm up...

Five minutes for the picture
and sound to come on,

three minutes to keep
it from slipping down,

two minutes to focus it,

and two minutes
to say a silent prayer

the whole thing
didn't blow up on us.

Come on, the set isn't that old.

Now, Ma, you've
got to be jiving...

That set's so old,



it still shows Jackie
Gleason on Saturday nights.

Has it started yet?
Did I miss anything?

Oh, simmer down, Thelma.
Nothing has happened yet.

I want you to put

the potato chips and the
popcorn in some bowls

and set it in front
of the TV set.

Okay, Ma.

Potato chips and popcorn... Wow!

It ain't every day that
your daddy is on TV.

To tell you the truth,

I'm getting a little
excited myself.

Yeah, I can just hear it now,

This is Walter Cronkite and
here is what's happening.

The biggest story today

takes place right
here in Chicago.

The windy city's
foremost carwash expert,

James Evans, Sr., father
of James Evans, Jr...

and two other
incidental children...

J.J...

Found a paper bag
that contained $27,000.

The money was the loot

from the Bargain
Supermarket hold-up.

Oh, quit clowning, J.J.

Your daddy did a
very wonderful thing

in returning that money,

and we all should
be very proud of him.

Mama, Daddy wasn't
really too anxious

to give the money back, was he?

What are you talking
about, Michael?

I heard you all talking
about it last night.

Daddy said, "Ain't no way
I'm giving that money back."

And you said, "But
James, you've got to."

Then Daddy said, "I do?"

Then you said, "Ain't
no other way, James."

Then Daddy said, "Okay."

Then you said,
"That's my James."

Then after that, I didn't
hear no more talking.

Well, your daddy may have
had a few moments' doubt,

but he knew right from wrong.

All I know is that if I would
have found that money,

I'd have walked
right into the bank,

and said, "My long lost
uncle just kicked the bucket...

"and he left me a bundle,

so point me to the new
accounts department."

J.J., that money was stolen,

and if you start talking
about uncles kicking buckets,

Uncle Sam will kick your bucket

and your new accounts
department will be San Quentin.

Flo, are you ready for this?

James is in all the papers.
They got a picture of him.

Oh, a picture.

Oh, my, children, don't
your daddy look handsome?

Oh, one thing
bothers me, though.

What?

He should have had a
better crease in his pants.

Ma, you can't
even see his pants.

It's from the waist up.

Honey, a man as handsome
and as famous as your daddy is,

he deserves a better
crease in his pants.

Hey, check out what it
says under his picture,

"Portrait of an Honest Man."

Right on, Daddy.

Hmm, it would
be better if it said,

"Portrait of the Shrewd
Dude That Kept the $27,000."

Lord, you'd be surprised,

a lot of people think that way.

Today, a lady walked into
the boutique and she said,

"You a friend of
the Evans family,

"the one that found that $27,000

and gave it back?"

I said, "Yes, I am."

She said, "Well, do me a favor,

and tell them for me
I think they stupid."

Well, I hope you told her off.

I did better than that,

I sold her a pair of pantyhose

two sizes too small.

Honey, she'll be
twisted out of shape

like the Hunchback
of Notre Dame.

Hey, what's that?

That's the TV set.

Gunfight in the High Country,
tomorrow's matinee movie.

Coming up next, the 6:00 News.

That's my seat!

Put your seat in another seat!

Good evening,
ladies and gentlemen.

Here is the 6:00 News.

We know it's the 6:00
News. Just bring on daddy.

On the national front,

there was more talk
on Capitol Hill today

on pending legislation
on Gerald Ford's...

Oh, Michael, turn that down.

We know what happened
in the nation today.

Food prices are up,
clothing prices are up,

unemployment is up,
and in Washington,

they ain't got down to the
ups that's keeping us down.

Ain't that a sight? James on TV!

Girl, I can't wait.

Whoo-wee!

And this is only
the beginning...

From here it goes
into his own series,

Little House in the Ghetto.

J.J., they already got a show,
Little House on the Prairie.

Yeah, but if they
don't do something

about the ghetto pretty
soon, this going to be a prairie.

I just had a horrible thought.

What, Ma?

I hope James don't
wear his pants on TV.

Ma!

I mean, I hope he don't
show his pants on TV.

Oh, Ma, don't worry
about the creases.

He'll look great. You'll see.

This set's so old, even
the faces got creases.

Don't you all worry
about nothing,

because when James
gets that reward,

you can buy a
brand-new color TV.

You think they really going
to give him a nice reward?

Sure, why are they
making all this fuss

if it ain't for money?

Michael, turn the set back up.

Maybe they're up
to the local news.

Okay, Ma.

And the question is

whether Congress can
override the expected veto.

On the local front,

the big human interest
story is about James Evans.

He found a sack of money,

part of the haul from a
robbery at Bargain Supermarket.

The sack contained $27,000.

Yeah, I counted every
penny of it personally

as it left this house.

Mr. Bargain,

President of the
supermarket chain,

is here in the studio
with Mr. Evans

to personally congratulate him

on his honesty in
returning the money.

Here come your daddy!

Here he comes!

Mr. Evans, may I congratulate
you on your honesty.

Thank you.

It is in times such as these

that we would
do well to dwell on

the positive
aspects of our lives

rather than on the negative.

Our first gesture
of appreciation

is this plaque,

which the Bargain supermarket

wishes to present to you.

Thank you.

You know, someone once said

that an honest
man is the noblest...

Thank the Lord for
not showing his pants.

See Ma, I told you.

Thank you.

Come on, man,
give him the plaque,

and let's get on to the reward.

And I find it encouraging indeed

that the common American man

has not lost his great
sense of morality.

Hey, everybody.

Later man. We're
watching Dad on TV.

Daddy!

Daddy!

James, oh, honey,
what are you doing here

when you're still there?

Oh, that's what they
call a delayed tape.

They did that thing
over an hour ago.

But the Bargain
Supermarket chain

feels that this plaque in itself

is not enough to
demonstrate our gratitude.

Therefore, right
after this broadcast,

we will present to you

a substantial financial reward.

How much did they give you dad?

I'll get a paper
bag to put it in.

If that's not enough,
I'll get a potato sack.

This is what they give me.

Oh, James, they
gave you a check!

A check! A check.

Now, look again, Florida.

It's a gift certificate for
$50 worth of groceries.

$50?

The way they rip you off
at Bargain Supermarket,

$50 ain't going to even buy you

$10 worth of groceries.

I know it's a little
bit disappointing,

but I still think we
did the right thing

in sending it back.

Yeah, I know,

you kept me up half
the night convincing me.

Hello?

Yes, this is Mrs. Evans.

What?

Well, we thought returning it

would be the only
right thing to do.

Well, what a
disgusting thing to say.

What do you know...

Yeah, this is James
Evans talking.

You got something to say,
you can say it to my face.

Yeah, well, come around
here and say that, man.

I'll have you on soup
and mashed bananas

for the rest of your life.

That's all I need is
some fool calling me up

telling me I'm crazy for
turning the money back in.

Oh, James, it ain't
everybody is that sick.

Don't answer it. J.J.

Hello?

Goodbye.

Oh, ma, is this what
it's going to be like?

No, no, no sweetheart.
This will pass.

Now give me... What
the hell you want?

Oh.

It's for you, babe.
It's Reverend Gordon.

Hello, Reverend.

Oh, no. James didn't
mean nothing by that.

Oh, you saw the news on TV?

Yeah, he done heard
about the generous reward.

Now he looking for
his cut for the church.

James, please.

Well, no, Reverend,

why it would be
no trouble at all.

We'd like for you to come
over. We want to see you.

Just come right on by.

Oh, that just about
makes my day,

that jack leg.

He probably tell you

how much better it is
to give than to receive.

Yeah, especially when
you doing the giving

and he doing the receiving.

Hello?

The same to you, goodbye.

I don't know, but I think

we just got cussed out
in a foreign language.

Will you let me answer
the next phone call,

because I've got
some choice words

I haven't used in years.

Now what?

Oh, my God!

What is that?

Here's another dummy

for the dummy family that
gave back all that money.

Damn!

James, please.

Now don't give me none of
that "James, please," Florida.

First, it was that
lousy gift certificate,

then them stinking phone calls,

now somebody got
my daughter all upset,

it makes me damn
glad I did what I did.

What'd you do, James?

James, I hope you didn't
do nothing you'll be sorry for.

The only thing I'm sorry
for is that I didn't do it bigger.

James, what did you do?

You want to know what I did?

I'll show you what I
did... This is what I did.

Oh, my...

Yeah, there was
$29,000 in that sack...

I kept that

before I gave back
the rest of the money.

Well, what you all looking at?

All I did was take
the reward in advance

that he wasn't going to
give me in the first place.

Yeah, I kept
$2,000 of the money.

Dad, how could you
do a thing like that,

keeping that $2,000?

You should have gave
that back and kept the rest!

James, this
money, it ain't ours.

No, you wrong, baby,
it wasn't, but it is now.

Honey, that's a crime.

Yeah, well, then I just
have to ask for a pardon.

Well, I can't really
blame James.

Bargain's is

the biggest rip-off
in the community.

He sells us
yesterday's groceries

at next week's prices.

Willona, you sticking
up for stealing?

I'm not sticking
up for stealing,

I'm sticking up

for sticking it into the dudes

that stuck it into James.

Later.

See you, kids.

Well, I'm on Dad's side, too,

but it ain't got nothing to do

with the black community.

It's got to do with
that green community

lying on that table.

A fine example you're
setting for your kids, James.

I ain't saying what
I did was right.

I know what I did,

but it's time these
kids found out

what the world is really like.

You and Ma have always taught us

about honesty.

What would the world be like

if everybody did this, Daddy?

Thanks, baby.

Well, Thelma,

that's what makes
the world go 'round.

I mean, that's how it works,

and when in Rome,
do as the Romans do.

Oh, James...

All I did was just let a little
money roam into my hands.

Don't answer it, J.J.

Don't worry, I'll handle it.

I ain't afraid.

Who is it?

Ernie and Fred, man.

No problem. Two of my
main men from school.

Hey, what's up?

Can we rap to you
for a minute, man?

Sure.

Yeah, the word's out
that you and your folks

are holding kind of heavy.

We're wondering if
we can float a loan,

you know, for a good
cause, namely, us.

My folks ain't got the money.

They gave all that money back.

Yeah, man, but you
got a big, fat reward.

We heard it on the TV.

Yeah, but... Come
on... Yeah, your crib

is the Fort Knox
of the projects.

Hey, what you saying, brother.

So long as you all so easy

about dealing away your bread,

suffer a little our way, huh?

Yeah, all you got to do

is ask one of your
lame-brained folks

to lay some of that
loot on us. Yeah, man.

We want some of that bread, man!

Was that about
the money, Junior?

Yeah, Dad.

Come on, son.

Damn!

More trouble, James?

Two slammed doors equal trouble.

James, there isn't
one word you could say

that'll make me want
to keep that money.

No?

How about hunger, baby?

We been there, you know?

We got a lot more
use for that money

than people down in
that jive supermarket.

James,

I wouldn't have their
guilty consciences,

not for all their money.

Yeah, and they
wouldn't take our income

for your good conscience.

Honey, we get by.

Yeah, well I'm
tired of getting by.

I want to get over for a change.

James, what you doing?

I'm going to show you
how we getting by, baby.

James, what are you
doing? No, come on,

I'm going to show
you how we getting by.

I done had enough of getting by.

James, I tell you,
listen to me, now.

What are you doing?

James, where are you going?

I'm going to show
you where I'm going.

You want to know
how we getting by?

That's how we getting by, baby.

Me working two jobs, you
working now and again,

and what we got?

Look at this money over here.

You know what this
means to Bargains?

About as much as
10 cents does to me.

I mean, hell, even less.

But James, please...

No, come on, Florida.
No more "please."

I want you to see
how we're getting by.

Dad's doing the spring cleaning

a little early this year.

You better be quiet, or
he'll clean up on you, too.

Now, this is it, baby.

Throw in whatever
else the kids got

and that's all we own.

But there's still no reason

for us keeping it, James.

Now, don't nobody move.

I'm going to deal with this one.

See, this might be another
one of them friendly calls.

What the hell do you want?

James!

You're bending the
Reverend Gordon.

I'm sorry, Rev.

Uh, hello.

How do you do, Reverend?

I'm so sorry.

Hello, children.

Hi, Reverend. Hi, Reverend.

Hello, Reverend.

I see the Lord has
been good to you.

Yeah, he helped one
who helped himself.

Oh, James,

quoting Scriptures
for your own ends

ain't going to do no good.

I assume this is the
reward they gave you

for your unselfish act?

Yes. No.

How about yes and no?

No, they wasn't going
to give me nothing, Rev,

so I just helped my damn self.

But he's going to give it back.

Isn't that the right
thing to do, Reverend?

Perhaps.

Give it back, Rev?

$2000 to that jive
rip-off supermarket?

Now, I ask you, Reverend,

would God want
me to give it back?

Perhaps.

But what else
would a good man do

but give it back?

Isn't that the answer, Reverend?

Perhaps.

Now, good is
measured in many ways,

Sister Evans.

Yeah, like maybe
a piece of this action

being a donation to
the church, huh, Rev?

Perhaps.

Oh, James,

the church don't
want no dirty money.

A few more perhapses
and he going to get it.

It isn't so much the
money or the source,

Mrs. Evans, but what
can be done with it.

Now, some of this money

can fill a lot of
hungry bellies.

But with stolen money, Reverend?

But is it stolen money
or did James find it?

Could this be God's
way of providing?

Now, James did what
he thought was right,

and it wasn't.

No doubt about it, it was wrong,

but if some of that money
were to come to the church,

which would be greater, the
old wrong or the new right?

God does work in
mysterious ways.

Yes, Lord.

Amen, brother.

You know something, baby?

The Reverend got a point,

that money can do a
lot of good right here.

Believe me, James,

that kind of money
can't do us no good.

Michael, that $2,000

gets you that much
closer to law school.

How about you, Junior?

How about painting on canvas

instead of cardboard
for a change, huh?

Yeah.

And Thelma, wouldn't you like

to go to a real nice school

for them acting and
dancing lessons?

What about you, baby?

I mean, if you get sick,

how about having a
chance to call a good doctor

instead of going
to that jive clinic?

James, believe me,

I know there are a
million and one things

this family could use,

but this is not the way.

Give it back, James, please.

For what?

So I can be poor but honest?

You make it sound
like something terrible.

Well, don't it make
no difference to you

how the rest of the
world is running?

Forgive me, James, but this...

This is the only
world that matters.

Amen to that, sister.

Now, we can do

without the heavenly
cheering section, Rev.

James there is no need
to lose your manners.

Yeah, well, that's about all
a poor man's got left to lose.

All right, Rev, go ahead.

The money ain't brought
us nothing but grief no how.

Take it.

Maybe you can do
some good works with it.

Excuse me, Reverend.

My dad isn't used

to being in the
upper income bracket.

The thin atmosphere
did gone to his head.

You better shut up
before I go to yours.

Well, what do you say, Rev?

The decision isn't mine
to make, Mr. Evans.

It's yours.

He didn't seem to
be much help, did he?

Uh, Dad, if you're
having any trouble

making that decision,

I'll be glad to make
the decision for you.

Like I said,

I'll let you make the decision.

I've already made it.

We're going to keep the money.

Dyn-o-mite!

Okay, James. You win.

Keep the money.

All right, now you're
getting with it, baby.

Michael, why don't
you take yourself

over to Big Daddy
Williams' place?

What you talking about, Florida?

Well, I'm sure a
big time operator

like Daddy Williams

could use a smart 12
year old to run numbers.

Nobody's going to
suspect a little boy like that,

and Michael could pick
up some real good money.

Florida, that ain't got
nothing to do with this, baby.

Thelma, you
remember that red dress

I made for you last year?

Yeah, Ma, but you said
it was too short for me.

Well, I changed my mind.

You put it on and go downtown.

There must be
an awful lot of work

a pretty little girl
like you could get

in those places
down in the loop.

Woman, have you lost your mind?

Don't stop me now, James.

I'm just getting down with it.

J.J., why don't you
run over to the market

and get dinner for all of us?

Okay, Ma, but I
don't have any money.

Oh, you don't need no money.

Just "find it."

All right, Florida, you
done made your point.

I understand where
you're coming from.

That means you're going to
give the money back, Dad?

Yeah, that's exactly
what it means, Son.

That's exactly
what I was afraid of.

Thanks, James.

Honey, this family
is our strength.

It don't matter

what some crazy sick people say,

as long as we do the thing

that'll keep us together.

Yeah, but you know
something, Florida?

It's a cold world out there
and we can't change it.

Well, maybe we
can't change it, James,

but we sure can
let it change us.

You're right, Ma.

Amen.

Amen.

Perhaps.

Here's one for us.

You see, James,

a lot of people thought
we did the right thing.

Yeah, baby.

I guess everybody
out there ain't sick.

Damn, but this one is.

Well, according to
the latest J.J. Poll,

that's 212 against
and 63 for us.

We're catching up, though.

Oh, here's one from
Reverend Gordon.

Is he for or against?

Neither.

It's a new
category... "Perhaps."

♪ Mm-mm-mm ♪

♪ Just lookin' Out
of the window ♪

♪ Watching the asphalt grow ♪

♪ Thinkin' how It all
looks hand-me-down ♪

♪ Good times Good times ♪

♪ Keepin' your
head Above water ♪

♪ Makin' a wave When you can ♪

♪ Temporary layoffs Good times ♪

Good Times is recorded on tape

before a live audience.

♪ Ain't we lucky we got 'em ♪

♪ Good times ♪♪