Good Eats (1999–2012): Season 4, Episode 3 - Fry Hard II: The Chicken - full transcript

(Alton Brown)
ONCE UPON
A MIDMORN DREARY,

AS I PONDERED
WITH QUITE BLEARY

OVER MANY A CURIOUS VOLUME
OF CULINARY LORE,

ON A LATTE I WAS SUCKING,
YET SUDDENLY THERE
CAME A CLUCKING,

AS IF SOME SALESMAN
WERE A-MUCKING, MUCKING

ABOUT MY KITCHEN DOOR.

'TIS SOME SALESMAN,
ONLY THIS, NOTHING MORE.

AND YET PRESENTLY
THE NOISE REPEATED,

SO I HOLLERED,
NO LONGER SEATED,

BEAT IT, PESKY HUSKER,
MUCKING 'BOUT MY
KITCHEN DOOR.

AT MY BUSINESS
I'M NOW WORKING,



SO MY CHAIN YOU'D
BEST STOP JERKING.

THEN THROWING WIDE
THE KITCHEN DOOR,

I FOUND THERE A CHICKEN,
AND NOTHING MORE.

LEAPT BACK I THEN,
WITH A STUTTER,

AS THE PHANTOM BIRD DID,
WITH A FLUTTER,

MOUNT THE FOLK-ART BUST
OF JULIA CHILD,

THERE UPON
MY KITCHEN FLOOR,

PERCHED AND SAT,
AND NOTHING MORE.

THEN THE PALLID POULTRY,
MOST PERPLEXING,

DID SET MY MEAGER MIND
TO GUESSING,

FROM WHENCE DID YOU COME,

TO PERCH UPON
THE BUST OF JULIA,
ON MY KITCHEN FLOOR?

QUOTH THE CHICKEN...

(high-pitched voice)
"FRY SOME MORE!"



AS CERTAIN IS
MY HEART IS TICKIN',

I'M CERTAIN
NO LIVING CHICKEN

HAS EVER SO CLEARLY
COMMANDED A LIVING COOK
BEFORE,

WITH AN UTTERANCE
SO CLEAR AND SHOCKING,

THAT EVEN I
COULD NOT IGNORE.

QUOTH THE CHICKEN...
"FRY SOME MORE!"

THEN THOUGHT I, PERHAPS
SHE'S ONTO SOMETHING.

FOR TOO LONG NOW
I HAVE BEEN SUPPING

ON FEED INCAPABLE
OF NOURISHING
MY ANGUISHED SOUL.

PERHAPS SOME
TRULY GOOD EATS

MY HUNGRY SOUL
COULD RESTORE.

QUOTH THE CHICKEN...
"FRY SOME MORE!"

"GOOD EATS," THAT IS.

WHEN PROPERLY PREPARED,
FRIED CHICKEN IS...

POETIC POULTRY.

PROBLEM IS,
IN THE LAST FEW YEARS,

THERE WERE A LOT OF CHEFS
AND A LOT OF HEALTH PUNDITS

WHO ATTEMPTED TO UPDATE IT
TO MODERN TASTES.

WELL, TO ME, THAT MAKES
ABOUT AS MUCH SENSE

AS HANGING A DROP-TILE CEILING
IN THE SISTINE CHAPEL,

ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU TALK
ABOUT PAN-FRIED CHICKEN,
WHICH --

ASIDE FROM BEING
A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT ANIMAL
THAN DEEP-FRIED CHICKEN --

IS NOT ONLY DELICIOUS,
BUT IT ISN'T BAD FOR YOU.

OF COURSE, THE FIRST THING
YOU'RE GOING TO NEED IS...
A CHICKEN.

OF COURSE, YOU BEING
A TALKING CHICKEN,

MAYBE I'LL HOLD OFF ON THE
LIZZIE BORDEN ROUTINE.

BESIDES, OF THE SIX
MAIN MARKET VARIETIES
OF CHICKEN,

ODDS ARE VERY GOOD
THAT YOUR LOCAL MEGA-MART

IS GONNA HAVE
AT LEAST THREE OF THEM.

SO RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE
OF THE CHICKEN CONTINUUM,

WE'VE GOT
THE BROILER-FRYER,

A PRETTY GOOD BALANCE
OF TASTE AND FLAVOR.

IT'S CALLED A BROILER-FRYER
BECAUSE WHEN PROPERLY
DISSECTED,

ITS SURFACE-TO-MASS RATIO
IS SUCH

THAT WHEN COOKED
IN 325 TO 350-DEGREE OIL,

THE MEAT ON THE INSIDE
AND THE SKIN ON THE OUTSIDE

ARE DONE AT EXACTLY
THE SAME MOMENT --
IT'S MAGICAL.

NOW IF YOU WERE TO TRY THAT
WITH A LARGER, STEWING CHICKEN,

YOU WOULD FIND
THAT BY THE TIME
THE OUTSIDE WAS DONE,

THE INSIDE
WOULD STILL BE RAW.

BESIDES,
WITH A CHICKEN THIS AGE,

WHENEVER YOU TRY TO COOK IT
WITH A HOT, FAST METHOD,

THE MEAT ENDS UP KIND OF...

I DON'T KNOW,
RUBBERY, I GUESS,
(boing-boing-boing)

SO IT'S OUT.

ON THE OTHER END
OF THE CONTINUUM,

WE HAVE
A ROCK/GAME CORNISH HEN.

IT GOES BY A LOT
OF DIFFERENT NAMES,
BUT IT'S STILL A CHICKEN.

BY THE TIME THE MEAT
IS DONE ON THE INSIDE,

THE OUTSIDE IS TOAST,
AND VICE VERSA.

IT'S JUST NOT
A VERY GOOD CANDIDATE.

SO THE FIRST PIECE
OF THE PUZZLE IS IN PLACE.

("chicken")
FRY SOME MORE.
HUSH, FOUL FOWL.

FIRST STEP --
MOVE YOUR BIRD TO A BOARD.

OOOH... WOBBLY.

WOBBLY BOARDS ARE
VERY DANGEROUS BOARDS.

BUT YOU KNOW THAT STUFF
THEY SELL DOWN
AT THE Z-MART?

OH, YOU KNOW IT...

IT'S KIND OF A LINER
MADE FOR SHELVES

SO THAT YOU DON'T
MESS UP YOUR CHINA.

WELL, GUESS WHAT?

IT MAKES A REALLY GREAT
NON-SKID SURFACE.

PUT THAT UNDERNEATH
YOUR BOARD, AND VOILà --
ROCK STEADY.

NOW WHY EXACTLY WOULD
YOU WANT TO CUT UP
YOUR OWN CHICKEN?

AFTER ALL, THE MARKET
WILL DO THAT KIND OF THING
FOR YOU.

WELL, ONE --
IT'S CHEAPER.

IN FACT, IF YOU DO
YOUR OWN CHICKEN,

YOU USUALLY PAY A FEW CENTS
A POUND LESS.

NUMBER TWO IS, OF COURSE,
THE FACT THAT IF YOU WANT
FREE-RANGE BIRDS,

THEY ONLY COME WHOLE.

NUMBER THREE --
RETAIL BUTCHERS GENERALLY
USE MEAT CLEAVERS,

WHICH CAN CREATE
LITTLE SHARDS OF BONE...

THAT'S NOT GOOD EATS.

AND NUMBER FOUR, THE LONGER
YOU KEEP A BIRD INTACT,

THE LONGER IT WILL
STAY FRESH.

NOW JUST RELAX.

YOU KNOW, BEFORE
WE START SURGERY,

MAYBE WE BETTER GET A LOOK
AT WHAT WE'RE CUTTING
OURSELVES INTO... COME ON.

ALTHOUGH WE DID
DISASSEMBLE A DUCK
ON A RECENT EPISODE,

AS CONFUCIUS SAID,
"A DUCK IS NOT A CHICKEN."

(whistles as if calling a dog)

A DINOSAUR, HOWEVER, IS...

AT LEAST, IF WE ARE TO TRUST
ALL THE HIP PALEONTOLOGISTS
THESE DAYS.

OF COURSE, A FEW THINGS
HAVE GOT TO GO --

FOR INSTANCE,
T. REX'S HEAD,

DEFINITELY NOT IN THE MIX.

AND I'VE NEVER SEEN A TAIL
LIKE THIS ON A CHICKEN,
EXCEPT AT A SIDESHOW ONCE...

WELL, YOU DON'T NEED TO KNOW
ABOUT THAT.

OF COURSE, YOU USUALLY
DON'T BUY A CHICKEN

WITH ITS ENTIRE LEGS ON.

THERE...
NOW ROLL HIM OVER,

AND THAT'S PRETTY MUCH
A CHICKEN.

LOOK, YOU'VE GOT THIGHS,
DRUMSTICKS,

RIB CAGE, BREASTBONE,

WISHBONE, WINGS.

LOOKS LIKE
A PERFECT ROAD MAP
TO POULTRY WORLD.

NOW ONCE YOU'VE GOT
YOUR BOARD SET UP,

APPROACH YOUR BIRD
WITH THE NECK FACING YOU.

GRAB A WING,
AND LIFT THE BIRD
OFF THE BOARD.

LET GRAVITY DO SOME WORK
FOR YOU HERE.

JUST OPEN UP,
CUTTING FROM THE BACK
TOWARDS THE FRONT,

AND THE KNIFE WILL
SLIDE RIGHT THROUGH

WHAT USED TO BE THE JOINT,
THEN REPEAT ON THE
OTHER SIDE.

REMEMBER, GRAVITY IS
THE BUTCHER'S BEST FRIEND.

NOW YOU'VE GOTTA GET
THE WISHBONE OUT,

SO PLACE YOUR KNIFE
INSIDE THE NECK CAVITY,
FACING UPWARDS,

AND WITH DOWNWARD MOTIONS,

SCRAPE THE LITTLE BIT
OF MEAT OFF OF THE WISHBONE.

YOU'LL SEE IT
ALMOST IMMEDIATELY.

TURN AROUND, AND SCRAPE
IN THE OTHER DIRECTION.

DON'T WORRY,
IT WON'T HURT YOUR KNIFE.

AH, THERE...
WE'VE GOT DINO-CAM,
VERY HELPFUL.

NOW REACH IN
WITH TWO FINGERS.

JUST WIGGLE THEM IN,
AND WORK YOUR WAY UP

TO KIND OF DISLOCATE
THE WISHBONE AT THE TOP.

THERE, NOW YOU CAN MAKE
A WISH WITH YOURSELF.

NEXT, THE LEGS.

MAKE AN INCISION
JUST THROUGH THE SKIN
ON EITHER SIDE,

WHERE THE LITTLE DEPRESSION
FORMS BETWEEN THE BREAST
AND THE DRUMSTICK.

NOW MAKE SURE YOU'VE GOT
GOOD SEPARATION THERE,

THEN ROLL THE BIRD OVER
AND FEEL FOR WHERE

THE THIGH BONES
MEET THE BACK.

JUST FEEL AROUND FOR THEM...
THERE THEY ARE,

THEY'LL BE RIGHT UNDERNEATH
THE SKIN, RIGHT OFF
THE SPINE.

SIMPLY GRAB THE LEG QUARTERS
AND BEND BACKWARDS.

AGAIN, THE THING IS
TO POP THIS SOCKET.

YOU LITERALLY WANT
TO DISLOCATE THAT JOINT,

THEN THERE'S GOING TO BE
ABSOLUTELY NOTHING
TO CUT THROUGH --

YOU'RE NOT GOING TO HAVE TO
LITERALLY SEVER THE JOINT
WITH THE KNIFE.

AND MAKE SURE YOU
SLICE FAR ENOUGH AHEAD
TO GET THE OYSTER --

YEAH, THAT LITTLE
PIECE OF MEAT

THAT POULTRY LOVERS
EVERYWHERE WOULD GIVE
THEIR EYETEETH FOR...

YEAH, THERE IT IS,
RIGHT THERE.

REPEAT ON THE OTHER SIDE.

NOW AS FAR AS SEPARATING THE
THIGH FROM THE DRUMSTICK --

AGAIN, WE'RE GONNA
LET THE JOINT TELL US
WHERE TO GO,

SO YOU JUST SQUEEZE
THE TWO TOGETHER,

AND YOU'LL FEEL THE JOINT
START TO OPEN UP, KINDA
LIKE A LITTLE DEPRESSION.

PLACE YOUR KNIFE THERE,
AND VERY CAREFULLY CUT DOWN,

NO MORE THAN
ABOUT 1/2 INCH --

REMEMBER, YOU'RE CUTTING
TOWARD YOUR HAND.

ONCE THE JOINT'S OPEN,
YOU'LL SEE HOW TO
FINISH THE JOB.

THERE...
NOTHING BUT MEAT.

NOW REPEAT
ON THE OTHER SIDE.

AS FAR AS THE BREAST,
YOU WANNA CUT

RIGHT DOWN ONE SIDE
OF THE KEEL BONE.

IT DOESN'T MATTER
WHICH SIDE YOU START WITH.

YOU'RE GONNA CUT
ALL THE WAY DOWN
ON THE KEEL BONE --

BREASTBONE --
TO THE RIBS.

THEN...
AH, THERE,
DINO-CAM, VERY HELPFUL.

YOU SEE THAT YOU
HAVE TO LITERALLY PEEL

THE BREAST MEAT
OFF THE RIBS.

NOW THIS IS A SKILL
THAT TAKES A LITTLE BIT
OF PRACTICE.

USE VERY, VERY SHALLOW CUTS,
AND LITERALLY PEEL IT AWAY.

THINK OF IT
LIKE ORANGE PEEL.

THERE, WITH THE WISHBONE
GONE, IT IS A PIECE OF CAKE.

WE'VE GOT A NICE,
CLEAN BREAST,
WITH SKIN INTACT.

NOW REPEAT
ON THE OTHER SIDE.

JUST KEEP OPENING IT UP,
LOOKING AT WHAT
YOU'RE DOING,

AND OFF IT COMES.

NOW VERY RARELY DO YOU SEE
A CHICKEN BREAST THAT NICE
IN A GROCERY STORE.

NEXT UP...
A NICE, LONG
BUTTERMILK SOAK.

NOW LOW-FAT BUTTERMILK
IS MORE VISCOUS

THAN FAT-FREE BUTTERMILK.

AND WHEN IT COMES
TO FRIED CHICKEN,

VISCOSITY IS
A VERY GOOD THING, INDEED.

ACTUALLY, THE MANIFEST
BENEFITS OF BUTTERMILK
WILL NOT SHOW THEMSELVES

UNTIL AFTER ABOUT
A 12 TO 24-HOUR SOAK
IN THE REFRIGERATOR.

AND BE SURE THAT YOU
FLIP THE MEAT OVER
AT LEAST ONCE,

SO THAT YOU GET
NICE COVERAGE.

IN THE MEANTIME, THAT
CARCASS AND THOSE WINGS

SHOULD BE IN YOUR STOCKPOT,
AND IF YOU'RE NOT
MAKING STOCK,

THEY SHOULD BE FREEZING,
FOR STOCK-MAKING LATER.

OH, AND WOULD YOU CLEAN UP
THIS CHICKEN-Y BOARD?

NOW LET'S SEE IF THAT
WON'T KEEP YOU QUIET.

THIS BIG BLACK PAN
IS THE LITTLE BLACK DRESS
OF THE CULINARY WORLD,

WHICH MEANS THAT IT
IS PERFECTLY SUITED

TO A WIDE RANGE
OF SITUATIONS,

ESPECIALLY FRYING CHICKEN.

OF COURSE, IF WE ARE
TO FULLY APPRECIATE
ITS MAGNIFICENCE,

WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO
TAKE A PILGRIMAGE

TO THE PLACE OF ITS BIRTH --
SOUTH PITTSBURGH, TENNESSEE,
AND LODGE COOKWARE.

SOUTH PITTSBURGH,
TENNESSEE,

WHERE OVER 100 YEARS AGO,
JOSEPH LODGE

FOUNDED THE FOUNDRY
THAT BEARS HIS NAME.

TODAY, HIS DESCENDANTS
OVERSEE THE PRODUCTION

OF THE ONLY CAST-IRON
COOKWARE MADE IN THE U.S.

UPON ARRIVAL, I
WAS GREETED BY
MY TOUR GUIDE,

WHO KICKED OFF THE TOUR
BY EXPLAINING

HOW CASTING IRON IS
A LOT LIKE COOKING --

IT STARTS WITH A RECIPE.

PIG IRON FROM BRAZIL,
SCRAP STEEL FROM
LOCAL MACHINE SHOPS,

AND LODGE'S OWN LEFTOVERS
ARE CAREFULLY WEIGHED OUT

BEFORE BEING DROPPED
INTO A FURNACE,

WHICH USES
ELECTROMAGNETIC FIELDS

TO REDUCE THE METALLIC MASS
INTO A GLOWING GOO.

ONCE IT HITS A SIMMER,
IMPURITIES EITHER COOK OFF
OR RISE TO THE TOP,

WHERE THEY
CAN BE SKIMMED OFF,
JUST LIKE A STOCK.

THE IRON IS THEN HAULED
INTO AN AUTOMATED
CASTING MACHINE.

HERE, TWO PATTERNS,
REPRESENTING

THE TOP AND BOTTOM
OF THE FINISHED PIECE,

ARE LOADED INTO
A MOLDING CHAMBER.

A MIXTURE OF SAND AND CLAY
IS INJECTED IN,

THEN SQUEEZED
AGAINST THE PATTERNS,

PRODUCING A SINGLE-SERVING
MOLD CALLED A CAKE.

A PRE-MEASURED DOSE OF IRON
IS THEN POURED INTO THE CAKES,

WHICH CRUISE THROUGH
A COOLING TUNNEL.

WHEN THEY TUMBLE OUT
THE OTHER END,

THE CAKES BREAK OPEN,
REVEALING THE ROCKET-HOT --

BUT NOW SOLID --
COOKWARE WITHIN.

WHAT SAND ISN'T DISLODGED
BY THE SHAKING TROUGHS

IS BLASTED OFF
BY STEEL BUCKSHOT
AND RECYCLED.

EACH PIECE
IS THEN INSPECTED AND
HAND-GROUND TO PERFECTION

BEFORE BEING WASHED
WITH SOAP, WATER,
AND RIVER ROCKS,

WHICH CREATE THAT
UNIQUE LODGE LOOK.

A RUST-RETARDING DIP
IN FOOD-GRADE WAX

IS FOLLOWED
BY PACKAGING AND SHIPPING
TO A GRATEFUL PLANET.

TIME TO TALK...
FAT.

MY FAVORITE FRYING FAT
BY FAR IS SOLID SHORTENING.

NOW IT DOESN'T REALLY
TAKE MUCH.

YOU ONLY NEED ENOUGH
TO COME ABOUT 1/3-INCH
UP THE SIDE OF THIS PAN.

AND SINCE I KNOW THAT
THIS IS A 12-INCH PAN,

AND THAT'S GONNA TAKE
16 OUNCES OF SHORTENING,

I ALSO KNOW THAT
I CAN JUST USE
THIS NUMBER 16 DISHER --

EIGHT TIMES, IN FACT --
I'LL LET YOU DO THE MATH.

I LIKE TO COMPLETELY
LIQUEFY THE OIL
OVER VERY, VERY, LOW HEAT

BEFORE TURNING IT UP
FOR COOKING.

NOW WHY USE SHORTENING,
WHICH HAS GOT A RELATIVELY
LOW SMOKE POINT?

WHY NOT GO WITH ONE
OF THOSE MONSTER OILS,

LIKE CANOLA OIL,
SAFFLOWER OIL,
OR EVEN PEANUT OIL?

WELL, IT ALL COMES DOWN
TO REFINEMENT.

YOU SEE, SHORTENING
IS USUALLY USED AS
AN INGREDIENT BY BAKERS,

SO IT'S GOTTA BE VERY,
VERY, VERY REFINED, OKAY?

AND THAT WILL
TRANSLATE HERE

INTO A VERY NICE,
GOLDEN-BROWN SKIN
ON THE CHICKEN,

AND MORE IMPORTANTLY,
NO FRYING SMELL IN THE AIR,

WHICH IS A VERY GOOD LESSON
TO REMEMBER

WHEN YOU'RE FRYING CHICKEN
OR FISH.

("chicken")
FRY SOME MORE.
I'M GETTING TO IT!

LET'S MEET
THE HARDWARE LINEUP
WHILE WE'RE HERE.

FIRST, THE RAW ZONE.

THE BIRD HUNKS DRAIN HERE,
THROUGH THIS COLANDER.

THEY THEN MOVE
TO A THREE-PHASE
TREATMENT AREA.

SEASONING
HAPPENS HERE...

DREDGING, HERE IN THIS
LIDDED CONTAINER...

AND THERE'S
THE PRE-FRY
HOLDING AREA,

WHICH IS VERY IMPORTANT
FOR CRUST FORMATION.

THEN THERE'S
ZONE TWO --
THE HOT ZONE.

THAT'S WHERE OUR PAN LIVES,

ALONG WITH TONGS,
A FRY THERMOMETER --

CAPABLE
OF READING AT LEAST
350 DEGREES --

AND LAST
BUT NOT LEAST,
A SPLATTER GUARD --

VERY IMPORTANT
FOR CLEAN-UP.

THEN WE'VE GOT ZONE THREE --
RECOVERY --

WHERE YOU'LL NOTE
THE CHICKEN WILL DRAIN
ABOVE THE PAN,

SO THAT IT DOESN'T HAVE TO
SIT IN ITS OWN GREASE.

NOW BESIDES
THE FACT THAT THIS
IS A LOGICAL PROGRESSION,

THIS SYSTEM
SPITS IN THE EYE
OF CROSS-CONTAMINATION.

"SO WHAT," YOU SAY?

HEY, YOU MESS AROUND
WITH THIS STUFF,

AND YOU, TOO,
WILL KNOW THE SPECIAL JOY

THAT COMES FROM COUNTING
YOUR BATHROOM FLOOR TILES
FOR THE THIRD TIME...

IN ONE SEATING...
I MEAN IT.

OKAY, NOW THAT
THE FAT HAS MELTED,

UP THE HEAT
TO MEDIUM-HIGH.

TARGET TEMPERATURE --
350 DEGREES.

NOW SHORTENING STARTS
TO BREAK DOWN AND GET NASTY
AT 370 DEGREES,

SO YOU WANNA KEEP
AN EYE ON IT.

BUT YOU DON'T WANNA LEAVE
THE PROBE IN HERE
ALL THE TIME,

OR IT'LL START TO READ
THE BOTTOM OF THE PAN,

WHICH IS NOT THE SAME THING
AS READING THE OIL.

LET'S GET THE CHICKEN.

AFTER A NIGHT'S SOAK,
THE ACID AND SUGARS
IN THE BUTTERMILK

HAVE ACTUALLY INVADED
THE CHICKEN MEAT,

WHICH IS GONNA GIVE IT
A NICE, TANGY FLAVOR.

NOW THE BUTTERMILK ITSELF
HAS FORMED A KIND OF
THICK BATTER --

THAT'S WHAT VISCOSITY
BUYS YOU.

YOU CAN'T PULL THAT OFF
WITH REGULAR MILK.

THIS IS A POULTRY SHAKE,
AND EVERYBODY
OUGHTA HAVE ONE.

MY SHAKE IS
TWO TABLESPOONS EACH

OF KOSHER SALT
AND HUNGARIAN PAPRIKA,

TWO TEASPOONS
OF GARLIC POWDER,

AND ONE TEASPOON
CAYENNE PEPPER.

I DISPENSE SAID SHAKE WITH
A $1.50 PIZZERIA SHAKER.

BY THE WAY,
TO KEEP THIS FRESH
IN BETWEEN SHAKINGS,

A PIECE OF WAXED PAPER
UNDER THE CAP DOES THE JOB,

JUST DON'T FORGET
TO TAKE IT OUT
BEFORE YOU SHAKE.

NOW LIBERAL SEASONING
IS ADVISED.

NOT ONLY ARE YOU
SEASONING THE MEAT,

BUT ALSO THE CRUST THAT
WILL SOON BE FORMING ON TOP,

SO GO FOR THE GUSTO.

NOW A QUICK DREDGE
IN ALL-PURPOSE FLOUR.

NOW YOU COULD AUGMENT THIS
WITH ANYTHING

FROM CORN MEAL
TO CORN FLAKES,

BUT THIS IS TRADITION
FOR A REASON --

IT'S GOOD!

NOW A LOT OF COOKS
WOULD SEASON THIS FLOUR.

I DON'T LIKE TO DO THAT,
AND I'VE GOT TWO
GOOD REASONS.

ONE --
YOU WASTE A LOT
OF SEASONINGS,

AND TWO --
SPICES LIKE PAPRIKA BURN.

BY STASHING THEM
UNDER THE CRUST,
THEY'LL BE PROTECTED.

NOW THIS MAY BE
THE MOST IMPORTANT POINT.

YOU WANNA GET AS MUCH
OF THE EXTRA DREDGE OFF
AS POSSIBLE.

ANY EXCESS WILL FALL OFF
IN THE PAN AND BURN,

AND THAT'S NOT GOOD EATS.

A LOT OF RECIPES,
INCLUDING THIS ONE,

RECOMMEND
A POST-DREDGE REST PERIOD

TO LET THE COATING SET.

BUT I DON'T GIVE IT MORE
THAN A COUPLE OF MINUTES,

BECAUSE "SET" IS EXACTLY
WHAT THIS COUSIN
OF LIBRARY PASTE WILL DO.

I CAN SEE BY THE
LITTLE WISPS OF SMOKE

STARTING TO FORM
ON THE SURFACE
OF THE SHORTENING

THAT THIS IS READY TO GO.

AND INDEED,
THE THERMOMETER CONFIRMS

A TEMPERATURE
OF 352 DEGREES.

NOW REMEMBER,
IT'S GOT A LOW SMOKE POINT,
AND AT ABOUT 360 DEGREES,

IT'S GONNA START
SMOKING HEAVILY.

THAT MEANS THAT IT'S
CHEMICALLY BREAKING DOWN,

AND THAT'S GONNA SMELL BAD,
AND IT'S GONNA TASTE BAD.

SO WE'VE GOTTA
GET THIS STUFF IN THE PAN,

BUT WE CAN'T JUST
CHUCK IT IN WILLY-NILLY.

I MEAN, CAST-IRON IS
A RIGHTEOUS CONDUCTOR,

BUT THERE'S STILL
GONNA BE A HOT SPOT,

RIGHT HERE,
RIGHT IN THE CENTER,
NEAR WHERE THE BURNER IS,

BUT WE CAN TAKE ADVANTAGE
OF THIS, AND HERE'S HOW.

TAKE THE FASTER-COOKING
PIECES, THE BREASTS,

AND WE'RE GONNA PUT 'EM
SKIN-SIDE DOWN

AT 10:00 AND 2:00,

AWAY FROM THE HOTTEST PART
OF THE PAN.

NOW THE DRUMSTICKS
TAKE A LONG TIME TO COOK,

BUT THEY'RE SMALL,

SO WE'LL PUT THEM
AT 7:00 AND 5:00.

THAT'S GONNA LEAVE
THE HOTTEST PART
RIGHT HERE IN THE CENTER

AVAILABLE FOR THE
LONGEST-COOKING PIECES --

THE THIGHS.

PUT 'EM DOWN
RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE,

SO THEY'RE NOT
TOUCHING ANYTHING.

THERE.

NOW NOTICE THE FAT ONLY
COMES HALFWAY UP THE SIDES
OF THE FOOD.

HEREIN LIES THE ESSENCE
OF PAN-FRYING.

THERE ARE TWO SPECIAL THINGS
GOING ON HERE.

FIRST...
WELL, YOU KNOW
WHEN YOU DEEP-FAT FRY,

THE HEAT ATTACKS THE FOOD
AT ALL SIDES,

AND IT TENDS TO CREATE A
VERY HARD, SHELL-LIKE CRUST

WHICH TRAPS IN MOISTURE,
AND THAT MEANS THAT IT
DOESN'T ADHERE WELL.

SO AS SOON AS YOU
TAKE A BITE,

THE WHOLE THING
COMES OFF IN YOUR HAND.

PAN-FRYING GIVES MOISTURE
A WAY OUT,

AT LEAST DURING
THE FIRST PHASE OF COOKING.

AND THAT'S GONNA
HELP THE CRUST REALLY
HOLD ONTO THE FOOD,

WHICH MEANS YOU'LL GET
SOME CRUST IN EVERY BITE.

THE OTHER THING
IS THAT THE FOOD

IS ACTUALLY BARELY RESTING
ON THE BOTTOM OF THE PAN.

THE BOTTOM OF THE PAN
IS HOTTER THAN THE OIL,

SO IT'S GONNA CREATE LITTLE
CARAMELIZED BITS OF GOODNESS
ON THE CRUST.

YOU'LL SEE LATER.

YOU WANNA COOK THIS
UNTIL IT'S GOLDEN-BROWN
AND DELICIOUS ON "SIDE A,"

AND YOU SEE
A LOT OF MOISTURE
PUSHING UP ON "SIDE B."

IT'S GONNA TAKE
ABOUT 12 MINUTES,

DEPENDING ON THE SIZE
OF THE PIECES.

TWELVE MINUTES IS UP,
AND ALL LOOKS WELL.

FIRST, WE HAVE
TELL-TALE LITTLE POOLS
OF MOISTURE HERE.

NOW SOME OF THAT IS
PROBABLY ACCUMULATED STEAM,

BUT MOST OF IT PUSHED UP
FROM INSIDE THE MEAT.

THEN, OF COURSE, WE'VE GOT
THE GOLDEN-BROWN CRUST,

WITH THE NICE,
LITTLE DARK AREAS --

THAT'S FROM SITTING
ON THE BOTTOM OF THE PAN.

THAT STUFF TASTES GOOD.

SO ROLL EVERYTHING
RIGHT WHERE IT IS.

NOW SINCE WE'RE
ABOUT TO INTRODUCE

A WHOLE NEW COLD SURFACE
TO THE OIL,

WE'RE GONNA GET A LITTLE BIT
OF A TEMPERATURE DROP.

SO BEFORE WE LEAVE,
WE'RE GONNA TURN THE HEAT
UP AGAIN TO MEDIUM-HIGH,

JUST FOR A FEW MINUTES,
TO HELP COMPENSATE.

AND REMEMBER, THE PAN'S
HOLDING ONTO A HUGE
AMOUNT OF HEAT,

SO IT'S GONNA DO
MOST OF THE WORK FOR YOU.

WE'LL CHECK
IN A COUPLE OF MINUTES.

BY THE WAY,
THIS LITTLE BABY HERE

IS THE BEST $15
YOU WILL EVER SPEND,

UNLESS CLEANING
EVERY HORIZONTAL SURFACE

IN THE KITCHEN
SOUNDS FUN.

DOESN'T TO ME.

WELL, ANOTHER 12 MINUTES
HAVE RUSHED BY HERE
IN TV LAND,

AND IF WE'VE CONTROLLED OUR
FAT TEMPERATURE PROPERLY,

"SIDE B" SHOULD BE JUST
A LITTLE BIT DARKER
THAN "SIDE A."

THAT'S BECAUSE
THERE'S MORE STUFF

FLOATING AROUND
IN THE SHORTENING
ON THE SECOND PASS.

MOST IMPORTANTLY,
THE INSIDE SHOULD BE DONE.

ONLY ONE WAY
TO KNOW FOR SURE...

183 DEGREES...
FINE.

I USUALLY DON'T ADVOCATE
TAKING DARK MEAT
BEYOND 175 DEGREES,

OR LIGHT MEAT BEYOND
165 DEGREES,

BUT I FIND THAT
ANOTHER TEN DEGREES

MAKES A BIG DIFFERENCE
IN HOW THE CRUST ADHERES
TO THE MEAT, POST PAN.

AND SINCE FRIED CHICKEN
MUST...
("chicken")
FRY SOME MORE.

(in exasperated tone)
YES, MUST BE EATEN
WITH THE FINGERS,

SLIGHTLY FIRMER MEAT
WILL BE A PLUS.

NOW ZONE THREE --
POST-OP --
RECOVERY, IF YOU LIKE.

IF YOU DO NOT HAVE A RACK
THAT LOOKS LIKE THIS,

PLEASE RESIST THE TEMPTATION
TO FOLLOW OTHER RECIPES

WHICH WOULD SUGGEST
THAT YOU DRAIN YOUR BIRD
ON PAPER TOWELS,

OR BROWN PAPER BAGS,
AS IF THERE WERE
A DIFFERENCE.

PUT THESE ASIDE,
AND GO WITH THE RACK
FROM YOUR OVEN.

YOU'LL BE GLAD YOU DID.

NOW SINCE THEY ARE
CRUST-ENCASED,

THESE WILL STAY ROCKET-HOT
FOR A GOOD 20 MINUTES,

SO DON'T STASH THEM
IN A WARM OVEN,

ESPECIALLY A GAS OVEN,
OKAY?

WHEN NATURAL GAS BURNS,
IT CREATES WATER VAPOR,

AND WATER IS THE SWORN ENEMY
OF FRIED FOODS.

SOME CONNOISSEURS
WOULD EVEN ARGUE

THAT THIS WILL BE BETTER
AT ROOM TEMPERATURE,

WHICH EXPLAINS
FRIED CHICKEN'S
PICNIC POPULARITY.

MY FAVORITE
SERVICE SCENARIO?
WELL...

MMM, THAT'S GOOD...

YOU KNOW,
YOU DON'T HAVE BE
A KENTUCKY COLONEL

TO KNOW THAT A BUCKET
IS THE BEST RECEPTACLE
FOR FRIED CHICKEN.

THIS SNAPPY LITTLE MODEL
CAME FROM MY LOCAL
HARDWARE STORE.

IT'S JUST A PAPER
PAINT BUCKET.

WHAT'S NICE IS THAT
THE PAPER WILL ACTUALLY

WICK AWAY EXCESS OIL
AND MOISTURE, WHICH
IS KIND OF NICE.

NOW LET'S REVIEW,
SHALL WE?

FOR PERFECT
PAN-FRIED CHICKEN,
START WITH A BROILER-FRYER.

CUT IT UP YOURSELF,
SOAK IT OVERNIGHT
IN LOW-FAT BUTTERMILK.

THEN DRAIN IT,
SEASON IT LIBERALLY

WITH A SHAKE
OF YOUR OWN DESIGN.

THEN DREDGE IT
IN ALL-PURPOSE FLOUR

AND FRY IT
IN A CAST-IRON SKILLET

CONTAINING A MERE 1/3-INCH
OF SHORTENING,

MAINTAINED AT AN AVERAGE
TEMPERATURE OF 325 DEGREES.

TURN IT ONE TIME,
AND ONE TIME ONLY,

THEN DRAIN IT
AND EAT IT.

I MIGHT ADD THAT
THERE IS NO BAD TIME
FOR FRIED CHICKEN.

SPEAKING OF CHICKENS...

THE CHICKEN...

NEVER FLITTING,
STILL IS SITTING,

STILL IS SITTING
ON THE FOLK-ART BUST OF JULIA
ON MY KITCHEN FLOOR.

AND IN HER THIGHS
I SEE THE QUIVER

OF A FUTURE
PAN-FRIED DINNER,

WHOSE CRUNCHY,
GOLDEN GOODNESS

DOES MY APPETITE IMPLORE
TO GO AHEAD
AND FRY SOME MORE.

Captioned by
Scripps Networks, Inc.