Good Eats (1999–2012): Season 2, Episode 8 - A Grind Is a Terrible Thing to Waste - full transcript

IF AMERICA HAS AN OFFICIAL
DISH, IT'S THE HAMBURGER.

TO ANY WHO WOULD ARGUE, I SAY

29 BILLION HAMBURGER PORTIONS OF
BEEF PER YEAR CANNOT BE WRONG.

NOW WHETHER THAT QUALIFIES
AS A CUISINE OR NOT,

NOW THAT'S ANOTHER QUESTION.

ANTHROPOLOGIST SIDNEY
MINTZ, IN FACT, ARGUES

THAT IT'S NOT ENOUGH FOR
A FOOD TO BE EATEN A LOT

OR EVEN COOKED A LOT...

IT MUST BE DEBATED, IT
MUST BE DISCUSSED OFTEN

BY THOSE WHO PRODUCE IT.

NOW BY THAT STANDARD, WELL, THE
HAMBURGER MAY HAVE BEEN CUISINE



AT ONE POINT, BUT NOT NOW.

I MEAN, WE'VE HANDED ALL
OF OUR BURGER MAKING OVER

TO DRIVE-THROUGH DRONES.

AND THE ONLY DISCUSSIONS
WE HAVE ON THE ISSUE

ARE WHEN WE'RE YELLING ORDERS
AT THREE-INCH SPEAKERS.

I DON'T KNOW IF MINTZ IS RIGHT,

BUT I DO KNOW THAT IF WE TAKE
BURGERS INTO OUR OWN HANDS,

TREAT THEM LIKE FOOD AGAIN,
INSTEAD OF SOYLENT GREEN,

THEN WE MIGHT JUST
GET OUR CUISINE BACK.

THEN WHO KNOWS
WHAT MIGHT HAPPEN?

FLAVORFUL MEATLOAF...
SUCCULENT MEATBALLS...

THE SKY'S THE LIMIT, REALLY.

(knocking)

PARDON ME, SIR.
I WILL GLADLY PAY
YOU TUESDAY



FOR A HAMBURGER TODAY.

TELL ME, MY
DISTURBINGLY
FAMILIAR FRIEND,

IF I GIVE YOU MONEY, ARE
YOU GOING TO GO BLOW IT
ON TAKE-OUT HAMBURGERS?

MOST CERTAINLY, SIR.
JUST AS I
THOUGHT.

HOP IN, BIG GUY, I'VE
GOT A BETTER IDEA.

YOU KNOW WHAT
THEY SAY,

BUY A MAN A BURGER,
FEED HIM FOR A DAY--

TEACH HIM HOW TO
MAKE A GREAT BURGER,

HE'S GOT GOOD
EATS FOR LIFE.

STRAP IN, CHUBBY!

(Al)
GROUND BEEF WAS PROBABLY
BORN DURING THE DARK AGES,

WHEN FIERCE TARTAR TRIBESMAN
CRUISED THE PLANES OF ASIA

WITH TOUGH CUTS OF BEEF
UNDER THEIR SADDLES.

THE CLEVER CARNIVORES THEN SHOT
THE TENDERIZED MEAT WITH HERBS

AND CONSUMED IT RAW.

THUS, STEAK TARTARE.

MISTER... HEY, MISTER!

HEY, HEY, MISTER!

ARE YOU GETTING
ANY OF THIS?

I WOULD
GLADLY PAY...
... PAY YOU
TUESDAY,

FOR TOMORROW'S
HAMBURGER NEXT WEEK.

YEAH, YOU TOLD ME,
YOU TOLD ME.

AW, COME ON, DON'T
CRY, MISTER.

I DIDN'T MEAN TO
BE MEAN TO YOU.

IT'S JUST THAT
THIS STUFF'S
REALLY IMPORTANT.

BECAUSE TO REALLY
UNDERSTAND THE ENTIRE
BURGER CHRONOLOGY,

YOU'VE GOT TO
UNDERSTAND THE
GERMAN EXPERIENCE

IN COMBINATION WITH
THE NEW WORLD...

FINE!

WHERE ONCE THERE WAS HAMBURGER,

NOW THERE ARE LIKE SIX OR
SEVEN GROUND-MEAT OPTIONS,

NOT INCLUDING PORK,
LAMB AND VEAL.

(whistles)
(cow moos)

SUCCESSFUL MEAT COOKERY
DEPENDS ON KNOWING

THE NATURE OF THE NATIVE CUT.

THE FIRST TWO ARE EASY.

GROUND ROUND AND GROUND
SIRLOIN ARE, INDEED,

FROM THE ROUND AND SIRLOIN
PRIMALS, RESPECTIVELY.

EXTREMELY LEAN,
ROUND AND SIRLOIN

TEND TO DRY QUICKLY
IF OVERCOOKED.

BUT UNFORTUNATELY,
HEALTH EXPERTS TELL US

THAT BECAUSE OF THE POSSIBILITY
OF FOOD-BORN ILLNESS,

WE NEED TO COOK OUR
GOUND MEAT TO...

WHICH FOR ROUND AND SIRLOIN,
IS PRACTICALLY JERKY.

THEIR BEST BETS FOR
CULINARY HAPPINESS

IS TO BE MIXED INTO A
MOIST MEATLOAF RECIPE

OR COMBINED WITH FATTIER MEATS
LIKE PORK, LAMB OR CHUCK,

WHICH DOES COME FROM
THE CHUCK PRIMAL.

FLAVORFUL AND JUICY,
CHUCK HAS A LITTLE BIT

OF CONNECTIVE TISSUE
AND ABOUT 30% FAT.

IN ITS RAW FORM,
CHUCK'S USUALLY BRAISED

INTO A STEW CHILI OR POT ROAST.

BUT WHEN GROUND, CHUCK
BECOMES HAMBURGER FODDER
EXTRAORDINAIRE...

WHICH IS NOT TO SAY THAT
IT'S THE SAME AS HAMBURGER

OR GROUND BEEF,
WHICH COMES FROM...

WELL, LET'S FIND OUT.

(Al)
HI, PENNY.
(Penny)
HI, Al.

GROUND HAMBURGER,
WHAT IS IT?

IT'S ALL OF OUR
LEFTOVER TRIMMINGS

FROM ALL OF THE
CUTTIN' THAT WE DO
DURING THE DAY.

WELL, LIKE THIS?
LIKE THAT.

BUT THAT'S
FILLET AND RIB.

I MEAN, THAT'S PRIME
STUFF THERE.

IT'S GOOD STUFF--
IT'S ALL GOOD STUFF.

SO BASICALLY,
SOMEBODY COULD VERY
WELL COME IN HERE

AND BUY JUST THE
HAMBURGER, WHICH
IS FROM TRIM,

AND IT WOULD BE
BETTER THAN, SAY,
BUYING GROUND ROUND.

ABSOLUTELY.
BUT HOW DO YOU
LIKE YOUR BURGERS?

I LIKE THE TRIM, AND
I LIKE GROUND CHUCK.

YEAH, DO YOU HAVE
ANY SPECIAL RECIPES?

YEAH...
WHAT IS IT?

A GREAT MEATLOAF
RECIPE, BUT I'M
NOT TELLING YOU.

WELL, EVEN IF THEY WON'T "'FESS
UP" THEIR SECRET RECIPES,

THE TRUTH IS MEAT CUTTERS ARE
STILL FULL-SERVICE PEOPLE.

SO YOU CAN GO INTO A MARKET AND
PICK OUT A ROAST OR A STEAK

AND ASK THEM TO GRIND IT RIGHT
THERE BEFORE YOUR EYES.

OF COURSE, THE TRUE HAMBURGER,
MEATLOAF AND MEATBALL LOVER

CAN AND SHOULD, I THINK,

OCCASIONALLY TAKE THE GRINDING
INTO THEIR OWN HANDS.

BEFORE WE GET TO GRINDING,

LET ME ANSWER THE QUESTION
THAT'S BEEN PLAGUING YOUR MIND.

YES, IT'S WORTH IT!

OKAY, THERE ARE THREE
BASIC WAYS TO HOME GRIND.

IF YOUR MIXER ACCEPTS A GRINDER
ATTACHMENT, YOU'RE HOME FREE.

HAND GRINDERS ARE INEXPENSIVE,
RELIABLE, EASY TO USE,

BUT MAY BE A LITTLE TOO "GREEN
ACRES" FOR SOME FOLKS.

A STURDY FOOD PROCESSOR
DOES AN AMAZINGLY GOOD JOB

AT CHOPPING MEAT, WHICH MAY NOT
BE EXACTLY THE SAME AS GRINDING.

BUT IT DOES TURN OUT
A DARN GOOD BURGER,

NOT TO MENTION STEAK TARTARE,
WHICH IS ANOTHER SHOW.

NOW ALTHOUGH I'M A
HAND GRINDER FAN,

TODAY WE'RE GOING
TO USE THE PROCESSOR,

SIMPLY BECAUSE IN THIS COUNTRY,

THESE OUTNUMBER THESE,
BY ABOUT 5000 TO 1.

NOW THE KEY TO
SUCCESSFUL GRINDING OR
CHOPPING IS PREPARATION.

ALL THE MEAT SHOULD BE CUBED

TO ABOUT AN INCH AND
A HALF, AND CHILLED.

NOW FOR A POUND OF GROUND MEAT,

WE'RE GOING EIGHT OUNCES
EACH OF SIRLOIN AND CHUCK.

THERE'S A COUPLE OTHER
PRECAUTIONS YOU CAN TAKE

TO MAKE SURE THAT YOU DON'T
PROCESS YOUR GROUND MEAT

STRAIGHT INTO BEEF MOUSSE,

WHICH MAY SOUND LIKE
A GOOD THING TO EAT,

BUT TRUST ME, IT ISN'T!

THOSE THINGS ARE, WORK IN SMALL
BATCHES AND WITH QUICK PULSES.

SO I'M GONNA START
WITH THE CHUCK.

JUST KIND OF SCATTER IT AROUND.

IT DOESN'T LOOK LIKE
MUCH, BUT THAT'S ACTUALLY

THE PERFECT AMOUNT FOR
A PROCESSOR THIS SIZE.

THE SECOND PART IS
WORKING IN PULSES.

IT USUALLY TAKES
ABOUT TEN TO GET THERE.

SO HERE WE GO...

BY THE WAY, THIS IS
WHERE I WOULD STOP

IF I WAS MAKING
CHILI... TAKE A LOOK.

GOOD CHILI GRIND.

THAT WAS SIX, RIGHT? YUP!

THERE WE GO... GOT ONE
LITTLE CHUNK IN THERE,

BUT BESIDES THAT, THAT'S
GREAT-LOOKING GROUND CHUCK.

GOT SOME GOOD FAT
WORKED THROUGH THERE,

WHICH IS EXACTLY WHAT WE NEED

TO HOLD THIS MIXTURE
TOGETHER LATER ON.

NOW SAME THING WITH THE SIRLOIN.

THIS IS WHERE I'D STOP IF
I WAS MAKING STEAK TARTARE.

BUT HEY, THAT'S ANOTHER SHOW.

GONNA TAKE A LOOK...

YEAH, THERE WE GO!

SAME TEXTURE, BASICALLY,
AS THE CHUCK.

A LITTLE FINER OF A GRAIN
MAYBE,

BUT THAT'S BECAUSE IT'S
A LITTLE BIT LEANER.

ONCE YOU'VE GOT
EVERYTHING TURNED OUT,

JUST KIND OF MIX IT OVER,
GET IT AS COMBINED AS YOU CAN.

NOW WE CAN GO
STRAIGHT FROM HERE

TO COOKING... WELL,
SEASONING AND THEN COOKING.

BUT IF YOU DON'T WANT
TO USE IT RIGHT AWAY,

JUST DO WHAT BUTCHERS DO...

WRAP IT UP IN A LITTLE PARCHMENT
OR BUTCHER'S PAPER,

PUT A PIECE OF TAPE
ON IT, LABEL IT,

AND USE IT WITHIN THE
NEXT COUPLE OF DAYS.

AND WE ONLY NEED ONE
THING... SALT,

KOSHER SALT.

I'D SAY ABOUT 1/2 A TEASPOON
FOR A POUND OF MEAT.

THAT'S ALL--NO
HERBS, NO CHOPPED ONIONS,

NO GARLIC, NO SOUP
MIX, NO MYSTERIES...

JUST SALT... WHY?

WELL, BECAUSE IT ACTUALLY
SEASONS THE MEAT.

IT MAKES IT TASTE BEEFIER,
AS OPPOSED TO HERBY

OR SHALLOTY OR GARLICY,
OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT.

ANY OTHER FLAVORS THAT
WANT TO HITCH A RIDE

CAN WAIT TO RIDE ON THE BUN.

NOW WHEN IT COMES TO PORTIONING,
WE LIKE A FIVE-OUNCE PATTY.

... NOT FOUR, NOT
SIX, FIVE!

AND TO GET IT, WE
GO TO THE SCALES.

NOW SEE, FIVE OUNCES
RENDERS THE PERFECT PATTY..

FOUR INCHES BY
THREE-QUARTERS OF AN INCH.

NOW WHEN SHAPING,
USE A LIGHT HAND.

NOW JUST START BY KIND OF
SHAPING IT INTO A BALL.

JUST KIND OF THROW IT BACK AND
FORTH UNTIL YOU'VE GOT AN ORB.

THERE--THEN
FLATTEN OUT GENTLY...

JUST KIND OF MAKE
A DISK, LIKE THIS,

USING AS LITTLE
PRESSURE AS POSSIBLE.

NOW IF YOUR HANDS
TEND TO GET HOT,

USE A LITTLE BIT
OF COLD WATER.

IT WILL MAKE THE
MEAT STICK LESS.

WHEN IT COMES TO PANS,
I LIKE CAST IRON.

IT'S EXTREMELY DENSE, SO
IT GETS VERY, VERY HOT.

AND IT CAN HOLD ON TO THAT HEAT
EVEN ONCE FOOD'S HIT IT.

THAT MEANS THE MEATS... WHETHER
IT BE A STEAK OR A HAMBURGER,

WILL HAVE TIME TO DEVELOP
A REALLY NICE CRUST.

NOW I LIKE A
GRIDDLE FOR HAMBURGERS

BECAUSE NO SIDES MEANS
EASY SPATULA ACCESS.

I DON'T HAVE TO FIGHT
MY WAY DOWN IN THERE

TO FLIP THE BURGER OVER.

I PUT THIS OVER MEDIUM HIGH
HEAT TWO, MAYBE THREE, MINUTES

BEFORE I'M READY TO COOK.

TO FIGURE OUT IF A PAN'S READY,

JUST DROP A LITTLE WATER
RIGHT INTO THE MIDDLE.

NOW IF IT SIZZLES UP LIKE
THAT AND QUICKLY EVAPORATES,

YOU'RE IN THE ZONE--GOOD TO GO.

IF IT JUST KIND OF LAYS
THERE AND LOOKS AT YOU--

GETS ONE OR TWO BUBBLES IN IT--

THEN YOU'VE DEFINITELY GOT
MORE HEATING TO DO.

AND IF THE DROPS JUST KIND OF
SKITTLE OFF THE SIDE OF THE PAN

LIKE RAIN ON A FRESHLY
WAXED CAR HOOD,

YOU NEED TO TAKE
THE PAN OFF THE HEAT

AND LET IT COOL DOWN FOR
A MINUTE BEFORE COOKING.

THIS IS PERFECT!

YOU'LL NOTICE THAT EVEN
THOUGH WE SALTED THESE,

WELL, QUITE A WHILE AGO,

NO MOISTURE HAS LEACHED
UP OUT OF IT AT ALL.

THE TRUTH IS, IT
WOULD TAKE HOURS

FOR THAT SMALL AMOUNT OF SALT

TO LEECH ANY REAL
MOISTURE OUT OF THIS.

SO ANOTHER MYTH
DISPELLED... INTO THE PAN.

NO PATTY SMASHING!!!

WE'VE ALL SEEN IT IN A MOVIE
WITH A DINER SCENE OR SOMETHING,

SOMEONE'S SQUISHING THE
BURGER, AND IT HISSES

AND MAKES THIS WONDERFUL SOUND.

WELL, THAT SOUND COMES
FROM THE FACT

THAT THIS IS PUSHING ALL THE
JUICE OUT OF THE BURGER.

SURE IT MAKES IT COOK QUICKER,

BUT IT MAKES THE MEAT
A WHOLE LOT DRYER.

SO... NO SMASHING!

IF YOU'RE LOOKING FOR
A MEDIUM RARE BURGER,

AND WHY ELSE GRIND YOUR OWN MEAT

IF YOU'RE NOT LOOKING FOR A
MEDIUM RARE BURGER--

WELL, THEY STILL TASTE GREAT--

GO FOR FOUR MINUTES
ON EACH SIDE.

IF YOU PREFER A MEDIUM BURGER,
LOOK FOR FIVE MINUTES EACH SIDE.

THEN WE'LL BE READY TO FLIP,

AND WE'LL BE READY FOR THE
SECOND CARDINAL RULE OF BURGERS.

NOW BEFORE YOU POUR ON THE
USUAL CONDIMENTS, DO ME A FAVOR.

JUST TRY THIS...
JUST ONE TIME, OKAY?

TOASTED BUN, RIGHT?

A LITTLE MAYONNAISE
OR A LOT OF MAYONNAISE,

DEPENDING ON HOW YOU
FEEL ABOUT MAYONNAISE.

A LITTLE BLACK PEPPER--FRESH
GROUND, RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE.

OKAY... NOW THAT IS GOING
TO FORM THE BASE OF A SAUCE

THAT WILL BE COMPLETED
BY THE JUICES

FROM A WELL-RESTED
HAMBURGER PATTY--

COOKED MEDIUM
RARE, OF COURSE.

TOP THAT OFF WITH THE OTHER
PART OF THE TOASTED BUN...

I'M WILLING TO BET THAT YOU
HAVEN'T HAD FLAVOR LIKE THAT

IN YOUR MOUTH FOR
YEARS, MAYBE EVER.

AND HECK, WE DON'T
HAVE TO STOP THERE.

THIS THING WAS
BUILT FOR ADD-ONS.

I MEAN, BESIDES, YOU KNOW,
MUSTARD AND PICKLES...

LETTUCE... ONIONS...
TOMATOES--

ESPECIALLY WHEN
THEY'RE IN SEASON--

SOMETIMES I ACTUALLY
LIKE TO TAKE...

ALTHOUGH COOKING TO
160 IS THE ONLY WAY

TO BE ABSOLUTELY DOUBLE-
DOG SURE YOUR BEEF IS SAFE,

MOST E. COLI CASES
INVOLVING BEEF

HAVE BEEN SPECIFICALLY TARGETED
AT COMMERCIAL GRINDERS.

SO GRINDING WHOLE CUTS AT HOME
CERTAINLY IMPROVES YOUR ODDS

OF CREATING A WORRY-
FREE, MEDIUM RARE BURGER--

A PLEASURE I ADMIT...
I NEVER EAT OUT.

BY THE WAY, EVEN IF
YOU PREFER WELL DONE,

GRIND YOUR OWN, IT JUST
PLAIN TASTES BETTER.

GREAT MEATLOAF IS ALWAYS JUICY,
BUT IT NEVER FALLS APART.

IT IS NEITHER BLAND NOR
SO HEAVILY SEASONED

THAT IT LOSES ITS MEATY SOUL.

A GREAT MEATLOAF IS, IN FACT,
A LOT LIKE A GREAT HAMBURGER,

ONLY TURNED INSIDE OUT.

THIS IS HOW WE DO OURS.

STEP ONE, OVEN SET
TO 325 DEGREES.

NOW THE SOFTWARE...
THERE'S A LOT OF IT,

BUT DON'T BE OVERWHELMED BY IT.

WE'RE GONNA KINDA
SPLIT IT INTO TEAMS--

THE DRY, THE VEGETABLES,
AND THE MEAT.

IT WILL BE A WHOLE LOT
EASIER THAN YOU THINK.

IT ALL STARTS WITH SIX
OUNCES, BY WEIGHT,

OF GARLIC-FLAVORED CROUTONS.

THEN WE FOLLOW THAT WITH 1/2
TEASPOON OF TWO PEPPERS--

BOTH BLACK AND CAYENNE--RIGHT
IN ON TOP OF THE CROUTONS...

A TEASPOON OF CHILI POWDER
AND A TEASPOON OF DRIED THYME.

NOW JUST SPIN THIS UP UNTIL
THE CROUTONS BASICALLY

DON'T LOOK LIKE
CROUTONS ANYMORE.

THERE, THAT LOOKS PRETTY GOOD.

THERE'S STILL SOME
RECOGNIZABLE FORMS IN THERE,

BUT HEY--IT'S MEATLOAF.

INTO THE BIG BOWL...

ONE-HALF OF AN ONION--I'VE JUST
KINDA CUT THIS UP INTO QUARTERS,

AND IT FELL APART THE
REST OF THE WAY.

INTO THE PROCESSOR...

ONE CARROT, JUST PEELED
AND SNAPPED INTO PIECES.

AND TO TELL YOU THE TRUTH,
IF YOU WASH THE CARROTS,

YOU CAN SKIP THE PEELING PART.

THREE CLOVES OF GARLIC--
NO PAPER, PLEASE--

AND ABOUT HALF OF A RED PEPPER,
JUST TORN INTO CHUNKS.

NOW IT'S BETTER TO OVERPROCESS
HERE, THAN UNDERPROCESS,

BUT YOU DON'T WANT TO
TURN THIS INTO A PURéE.

THAT LOOKS ABOUT RIGHT.

JUST GET YOUR FINGER UNDERNEATH
AND HOLD THE BLADE IN...

YOU CAN DROP
EVERYTHING IN AT ONCE.

NOW BESIDES BODY AND SWEETNESS,

THE VEGETABLES PROVIDE A LOT
OF MOISTURE FOR THE MEATLOAF,

WHICH IS ACTUALLY
GOING TO PREVENT US

FROM HAVING TO
ADD EXTRA MOISTURE.

MOST RECIPES THAT YOU SEE
INCLUDE A LOT OF WATER

OR CREAM EVEN, OR A
LOT OF EXTRA OIL.

WE'RE NOT GOING TO
NEED ANY OF THAT,

BECAUSE THE MOISTURE'S
ALREADY BUILT IN.

NOW THE MEAT IS THE
SAME BREAKDOWN

AS WE USED BEFORE--

EIGHTEEN OUNCES OF EACH.

OKAY.

THAT GOES ON TOP.

NOW I'M ALSO GOING TO GO AHEAD
AND ADD A LITTLE BIT OF SALT...

NOT A WHOLE LOT, BECAUSE
THOSE CROUTONS, I ADMIT,

I BOUGHT IN A STORE...
OKAY, I'M A LITTLE LAZY.

THEY HAVE A LOT OF
SODIUM ON THERE,

BUT THEY'RE GOING TO NEED
JUST A LITTLE BIT MORE,

'CAUSE THERE'S A
LOT OF MEAT IN HERE.

SO I'M GOING TO PUT ABOUT A
TEASPOON AND A HALF OF SALT

RIGHT ON TOP OF THE MEAT.

I'M GOING TO GO
AHEAD AND MIX THIS UP

BEFORE WE ADD THE
FINAL INGREDIENT.

OF COURSE, THE FINAL
INGREDIENT WOULD BE SOMETHING

TO HELP BIND ALL THIS UP.

THAT WOULD BE SOMETHING THAT

WOULD HOPEFULLY HAVE AN
EMULSIFIER IN IT, MAYBE...

SOMETHING LIKE, SAY,
LECITHIN, WHICH OF COURSE,

WOULD BE PRESENT IN LARGE
AMOUNTS IN ONE EGG.

IT ONLY TAKES ONE.

IF YOU PUT TWO EGGS
INTO A MEATLOAF,

SOME REALLY NASTY
THINGS CAN HAPPEN.

IT'S GOT TO DO WITH
PROTEINS AND FATS...

LET'S JUST SAY, DON'T USE MORE
THAN ONE, BECAUSE ONE'S ENOUGH.

DON'T CRACK THIS ON
THE SIDE OF THE BOWL.

IT'S A BAD THING... IT PUSHES
THE SHELLS UP INTO THE EGG.

SO ONE EGG, RIGHT
INTO THE MIDDLE.

THESE ARE CLEAN AND
THEY'RE PERFECTLY USABLE.

WHAT YOU DON'T WANT TO DO IS
WORK THE MEATLOAF LIKE THIS.

YOU DON'T WANT TO SQUEEZE IT.

THAT'S JUST GONNA MESS UP
THE WONDERFUL TEXTURE

THAT WE'VE GOT
WORKING IN THE MEAT.

SO JUST TOSS THIS.

TIME TO PAN UP!

NOW THE LOAF PAN IS NOT
HERE FOR WHAT YOU THINK.

JUST KIND OF PACK THIS
STRAIGHT INTO THE LOAF PAN.

AND ONCE IT'S ALL
IN, KIND OF PUSH IT OUT

SO THAT IT FILLS THE CORNERS.

THIS IS STRICTLY
GOING TO BE A MOLD.

NOW LET'S TURN THIS OUT RIGHT
INTO THE MIDDLE OF THE PAN,

OR AS CLOSE TO THE
MIDDLE AS YOU CAN GET.

AND IT WILL COME OUT LIKE THAT.

WHY NOT COOK THE MEATLOAF IN
THIS PAN INSTEAD OF THAT PAN?

OIL CAN GET OUT... THE
FAT THAT SEEPS OUT--

AND THERE'S GONNA BE SOME--CAN
HEAD RIGHT ON OUTTA THE LOAF.

IN HERE, NO SUCH LUCK.

IF YOU DON'T HAVE A
LOAF PAN TO SHAPE IT,

JUST THROW IT DOWN AND
SHAPE IT WITH YOUR HANDS.

JUST PUT A LITTLE COLD WATER ON
YOUR HANDS BEFORE YOU DO IT.

I'VE SEEN MEATLOAVES THAT
LOOK LIKE CARTOON CHARACTERS,
FOR GOODNESS SAKES.

THE MOST IMPORTANT THING
ABOUT COOKING MEATLOAF

IS TEMPERATURE MANAGEMENT.

IF THIS OVERCOOKS
OR IT COOKS TOO FAST,

YOU'RE GOING TO GET
A GRAINY TEXTURE,

BECAUSE ALL THE LITTLE
PROTEINS ARE GONNA BALL UP,

AND THEY'LL JUST SQUEEZE OUT
ALL OF THE OTHER INGREDIENTS.

IT'LL CRUMBLE ON THE
PLATE... VERY UNSATISFYING.

SO THE BEST THING TO DO
IS STICK WITH A LOW OVEN

AND USE A PROBE THERMOMETER.

JUST INSERT THE PROBE
AT A 45 DEGREE ANGLE,

RIGHT INTO THE TOP OF
THE LOAF... LIKE THAT.

YOU DON'T WANT TO OVERSHOOT
THE MIDDLE OF THE LOAF,

OR YOU MIGHT HIT THE
BOTTOM OF THE PAN,

AND THAT WILL GIVE
YOU A FALSE READING.

SO THAT'S PRETTY SECURE.

THIS IS GOING TO GO STRAIGHT
INTO THAT 325 DEGREE OVEN.

IT'S A RELATIVELY LOW OVEN.

NOW ALL YOU HAVE TO DO
IS PLUG IN YOUR PROBE,

AND WAIT TILL SHE CHIRPS.

OF COURSE, THERE IS ONE
OTHER SMALL JOB TO DO...

THE GLAZE--AND IT'S
PRETTY COMPLICATED,

SO YOU'D BETTER HOLD
ON TO YOUR BRITCHES.

IT ALL STARTS WITH A
HALF CUP OF KETCHUP.

ANY BRAND WILL DO.

THE SUGAR IN THE KETCHUP IS
GOING TO HELP TO CREATE

THE HARDENED SURFACE
OF THE GLAZE.

YOU NEED A LITTLE
BIT OF SUGAR FOR THAT,

OTHERWISE IT'S JUST
GOING TO BE RED FROSTING.

NEXT, A TABLESPOON OF CUMIN...

HOPEFULLY FRESHLY TOASTED
AND GROUND WOULD BE BEST.

THEN YOU'RE GOING TO TOSS IN A
SHOT OF WORCESTERSHIRE SAUCE

AND A SHOT OF YOUR FAVORITE
HOT SAUCE... THERE YOU GO.

AND JUST TO MAKE SURE THIS
REALLY DOES BECOME A GLAZE,

SOMETHING THAT'S GOT A SHINY
CRUNCH ON THE OUTSIDE,

I GIVE A COUPLE
SQUEEZES OF HONEY...

NOT A LOT--DON'T WANT TO
OVERWHELM IT WITH SWEETNESS.

JUST MIX THAT UP, KINDA LIKE A
VERY, VERY RED COCKTAIL...

AND SPOON IT ON.

NOW I USUALLY WAIT AND DO THIS

ONCE THE MEATLOAF'S BEEN IN
FOR, WELL, 10 OR 15 MINUTES,

JUST TO LET THE OUTSIDE
OF THE MEAT KIND OF
CRUST UP A LITTLE BIT.

IF IT'S LESS MOIST
ON THE SURFACE,

THE GLAZE IS GONNA
STICK BETTER.

YEAH, THAT LOOKS ABOUT RIGHT.

OF COURSE, OVEN OPENING IS
EVIL,
AS WE ALL KNOW, SO WORK
QUICKLY.

WHEN IT SETS, THIS GLAZE WILL
CREATE A DARNED TASTY CRUST--

CRUST BEING ANOTHER THING YOU
CAN'T GET IF YOU USE A LOAF
PAN.

YOU KNOW, ONE OF THE THINGS THAT
I LIKE BEST ABOUT MEATLOAF

IS THAT IT'S MODULAR, IT'S KINDA
THE GARANIMALS OF FOOD.

YOU CAN SWITCH OUT ALMOST
ANY INGREDIENT IN THIS

AS LONG AS YOU KEEP
THE CHUCK THERE.

AT LEAST A THIRD OF THE MEAT
SHOULD ALWAYS BE BEEF CHUCK.

IT'S GOT THE TEXTURE,
THE RIGHT FAT CONTENT...

BUT YOU COULD USE GROUND LAMB,
YOU COULD USE GROUND PORK...

JUST ABOUT ANYTHING
THAT YOU LIKE.

AS FAR AS VEGETABLES
GO, SHOOT,THE
SKY'S THE LIMIT.

BUT IF YOU REALLY LIKE HIGH-
MOISTURE THINGS LIKE MUSHROOMS,

COOK THEM A LITTLE BIG BEFORE
YOU ADD THEM TO THE MEATLOAF,

OR THEY'LL JUST WATERLOG IT.

OH, DID I MENTION THAT
THIS MEATLOAF RECIPE

MORPHS MARVELOUSLY
INTO MEATBALLS?

IT'S TRUE--ALL YOU HAVE TO DO
IS SCOOP IT OUT WITH A DISHER,

OR EVEN AND ICE CREAM SCOOP,

SHAPE THEM INTO ROUNDS, BROWN
THEM IN A LITTLE HOT OIL,

AND THEN BRAISE THEM LONG AND
LOW IN A NICE, RED SAUCE.

OF COURSE, THE RED
SAUCE IS ANOTHER SHOW.

HEY! WHAT THE...?

NOW BEFORE YOU SLICE
THAT UP INTO LUSCIOUS SLABS

AND PARK IT ALONGSIDE
MASHED POTATOES

OR BUILD ANY INCREDIBLY
HIGH MEATLOAF SANDWICHES,

WHICH I INTEND TO DO,
GIVE THIS A REST.

AFTER ALL, IT IS MEAT,
AND IT NEEDS A FEW MINUTES

JUST TO KIND OF GET ITS
JUICES BACK TOGETHER.

SO TEN MINUTES ON THE COUNTER,

AND WHEN CUTTING
TIME DOES ARRIVE,

BREAK OUT YOUR SERRATED KNIFE.

IT'S GONNA MAKE FOR A
MUCH, MUCH CLEANER CUT,

AND YOUR PIECES...

EXCUSE ME.

WE HOPE WE'VE
SHED SOME NEW LIGHT

ON OUR OLD FRIEND, GROUND MEAT.

LONG EXILED TO DRIVE-THROUGHS
AND KETCHUP CASSEROLES,

THIS AMERICAN MANNA WAITS
FOR US TO COME TO ITS RESCUE.

CONSIDERING THE VEXING
DISAPPEARANCES OF TODAY,

LOOKS LIKE I'M OFF TO
RESCUE A LITTLE BIT MORE.

SEE YOU NEXT TIME,
ON "GOOD EATS."