Good Eats (1999–2012): Season 11, Episode 16 - If It Ain't Broccoli Don't Fix It - full transcript
It may be the bane of children, but broccoli is a nutritional superfood.
GOOD EVENING
AND WELCOME ONCE AGAIN
TO THE FOOD GALLERY.
OVER THE YEARS,
WE'VE MANAGED TO SHUT DOWN
MANY OF THE EXHIBITS HERE
IN THE VEGETAL HALL OF HORRORS.
SPINACH, PEAS, BEETS,
DARK, LEAFY GREENS
DON'T LIVE HERE ANYMORE,
BUT THERE IS ONE INMATE
WHO SEEMS DETERMINED
TO REMAIN ON PERMANENT DISPLAY--
BRASSICA OLERACEA--
BROCCOLI.
FALSELY ACCUSED OF BEING BITTER,
LIMP OR BLAND AND BORING,
THIS FLOWERING BODY
HAS GARNERED THE IRE
OF PRESIDENTS
AND PUBESCENTS ALIKE.
YOU SEE, BROCCOLI
ENTERED THIS COUNTRY
RATHER LATE
IN THE IMMIGRATION GAME,
AT A TIME WHEN THE COUNTRY'S
COLLECTIVE HEART
WAS HARDENING AGAINST NEWCOMERS.
THIS HATEFUL SENTIMENT
WAS BEST VOICED
IN AN INSIGHTFUL CARTOON
FROM A 1928 EDITION
OF "THE NEW YORKER,"
DEPICTING A DOMESTIC SCENE
IN WHICH BROCCOLI WAS MAKING
A HOPEFUL DEBUT.
TRY IT, DEAR.
IT'S CALLED BROCCOLI.
I SAY IT'S SPINACH,
AND I SAY TO (beep) WITH IT!
(gasps)
FEAR OF THE UNKNOWN
OFTEN LEADS
TO DESTRUCTIVE ATTITUDES
AND ACTIVITIES.
SIMPLY PREPARED, BROCCOLI
CAN BE EVERY BIT AS TASTY
AS APPLE PIE--
DIFFERENT, BUT DELICIOUS.
IT MAY HAVE ONCE BEEN BANNED
FROM "AIR FORCE ONE,"
BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN
THAT BROCCOLI IS NOT...
¶
THE WORD "BROCCOLI"
MEANS "LITTLE ARMS" IN ITALIAN,
AND IT IS THAT CHARACTERISTIC
WHICH MAKES IT POSSIBLE
FOR YOU AND I TO SEPARATE
BROCCOLI FROM ITS KIN,
SUCH AS CAULIFLOWER,
BRUSSELS SPROUTS,
KALE AND REGULAR OLD CABBAGE,
WHICH ARE SO GENETICALLY CLOSE
TO BROCCOLI,
THAT WHEN BOTANISTS TRY
TO JUSTIFY THEIR EXISTENCE,
THEY...
BUT THEN WAIT,
IF THIS IS CABBAGE
AND THIS IS CABBAGE,
AND--BUT THIS IS BROCCOLI,
BUT IT--BUT THAT MEANS
THAT THIS IS BROCCOLI,
SO IT MUST BE CABBAGE, TOO!
(laughs maniacally)
I THINK THE SCIENTIFIC TERM
IS "BLOW A GASKET."
NOW IT IS BELIEVED
THAT BROCCOLI WAS DEVELOPED
MORE THAN 2,000 YEARS AGO,
FIRST BY ETRUSCAN GARDENERS
AND THEN BY ROMANS,
WHO WERE BIG BROCCOLI FANS.
IN FACT, DRUSUS,
THE OLDEST SON OF TIBERIUS,
I THINK IT IS,
ATE NOTHING BUT BROCCOLI
FOR A MONTH
UNTIL IT LITERALLY CHANGED
HIS WATER GREEN.
BROCCOLI'S BIG BREAK
IN THIS COUNTRY
CAME WHEN A COUPLE
OF ITALIAN BROTHERS
BEGAN GROWING IT IN CALIFORNIA
IN THE EARLY 20th CENTURY.
TODAY, ROUGHLY 90%
OF THE U.S. CROP
COMES FROM THE GOLDEN STATE.
THE PROBLEM IS I CAN'T FIND
ANY OF THE CROP AROUND HERE.
WHERE IS THE BROCCOLI?
CAN I HELP YOU?
WELL, I CAN'T
HELP BUT NOTICE
THAT YOU'RE
ARRANGING VEGETABLES.
VEGETABLES? HA!
GIVE IT SOME TIME
AND ALL THESE WILL EXPLODE
INTO BEAUTIFUL, PRECIOUS,
PRETTY FLOWERS LIKE THESE.
UH-HUH. UM, BOTANICALLY,
SHE'S RIGHT.
MOST VARIETIES OF BROCCOLI
ARE FLOWERING BODIES,
ALTHOUGH THERE ARE
SOME HEADING VARIETIES
WHICH ARE MORE CLOSELY RELATED
TO CAULIFLOWER.
OH, I HAVE SOME LOVELY
CAULIFLOWER CENTERPIECES
RIGHT OVER HERE.
YES, VERY...
ARTISTIC.
AND I SEE THAT YOU ALSO HAVE
SOME OF BROCCOLI'S MORE
CROSSBRED COUSINS HERE AS WELL.
I'VE GOT
SOME BROCCOLI RABE...
UM--VERY BITTER
YET STRANGELY DELICIOUS--
CLOSELY RELATED TO TURNIP,
I BELIEVE.
AND BROCCOLINI...
A HYBRID CROSS BETWEEN BROCCOLI
AND CHINESE KALE.
AND I SEE YOU HAVE SOME
OF THIS STRANGE BUT WONDERFUL
BROCCOLI ROMANESCO.
NO, THIS ONE CAN'T BE
A VEGETABLE.
LOOK HOW PRETTY IT IS--
ALL THOSE TINY, LITTLE CONES.
IT LOOKS
LIKE A MAGIC FAIRY SANDCASTLE.
YES, DOESN'T IT?
WELL, IF YOU ASK ME,
NO ONE IS GONNA WANT
TO EAT THAT,
BECAUSE ONCE IT FLOWERS,
BROCCOLI IS EXTREMELY BITTER.
WELL, I DIDN'T ASK YOU!
BUT IF YOU ASK ME, YOU SHOULD
STOP THINKING SO MUCH.
STOP AND SMELL
THE FLOWERS!
COME HERE.
WHEN SHOPPING
FOR REGULAR BROCCOLI,
YOU WANT BUDS
THAT ARE FIRMLY CLOSED,
FLORETS THAT ARE
TIGHTLY GROUPED,
AND YOU WANT
A NICE, BRIGHT GREEN COLOR--
NO SPLOTCHES ANYWHERE.
ALSO CHECK OUT
THE BASE OF THE STEM.
IT SHOULD BE MOIST.
IF IT'S WHITE
AND KIND OF CRUSTY,
THAT MEANS
THAT SOME OF THE SUGAR IN HERE
HAS CONVERTED TO LIGNIN,
WHICH IS A KEY INGREDIENT
IN WOOD--NOT GOOD EATS.
THIS IS IDEAL.
DUE TO ITS FLORAL NATURE,
BROCCOLI HAS A TENDENCY TO SPOIL
MORE QUICKLY
THAN OTHER VEGETABLES,
BUT A FEW DAYS HERE
IN THE CHILL CHEST
WILL DO NO HARM.
THAT'S
WHY YOU SHOULD--
DON'T PUT YOUR BROCCOLI
UP HERE!
IT'S YOU!
FOLLOW ME
TO A FAR, FAR BETTER PLACE!
HEY!
IF YOU WANT THAT BROCCOLI
TO HAVE A CHANCE AT SURVIVAL,
YOU'LL PUT IT IN THIS DRAWER,
WHICH THANKS TO HIGHER HUMIDITY,
KEEPS VEGGIES CRISPER,
FRESHER AND FIRMER!
WELL, I DON'T SEE
A HUMIDIFIER IN HERE.
OF COURSE YOU DON'T,
LUMMOX!
IT USES A GASKET
TO TRAP THE MOISTURE
RELEASED BY THE PRODUCE ITSELF.
OKAY, THEN WHAT'S
THIS LITTLE SLIDER FOR?
IT OPENS AND CLOSES
THE GASKET,
ALLOWING FOR MORE
OR LESS AIRFLOW.
SET IT TO LOW AND AIR
WILL CIRCULATE IN AND OUT--
BEST FOR FRUITS
PROTECTED BY THICK SKINS.
FLIP IT TO HIGH,
AND YOUR VEGGIES
WILL FEEL MORE AT HOME.
AND, OF COURSE,
THE DRAWER CONFIGURATION
HELPS PREVENT COLD AIR
FROM ESCAPING EVERY TIME
SOME IDIOT LIKE YOU STANDS
AROUND WITH THE DOOR OPEN!
WELL, MOST LUMMOXES
PROBABLY DON'T STAND AROUND
TALKING TO YARD ORNAMENTS
IN HERE.
ANYTHING ELSE?
PLASTIC BAGS ARE FINE,
BUT BE SURE TO PUNCH A FEW HOLES
IN THERE TO LET MOISTURE ESCAPE.
CONDENSATION IS THE BANE
OF FRESH VEGGIES,
DON'T YOU KNOW?
BY THE WAY, WHEN'S THE LAST TIME
YOU CLEANED UP IN HERE?
A GOOD SCRUBBING
EVERY OTHER MONTH
WILL KEEP MOLD
AND OTHER NASTINESS AWAY.
(mumbling loudly)
(German accent)
PERHAPS YOU NEED
TO SPEND A LITTLE TIME
IN THE COOLER.
HOW DARE YOU TRY
TO SILENCE THE GNOME!
ALTHOUGH I'M SURE
THERE'S MORE THAN ONE WAY
TO TRIM A BROCCOLI CROWN,
I PREFER TO DO IT
BY FLIPPING IT UPSIDE DOWN.
JUST USE A PARING KNIFE
TO MAKE QUICK DIAGONAL CUTS,
WHICH WILL GIVE YOU
A NICE HARVEST OF THE FLORETS.
IF THE STALK SEEMS DRY OR TOUGH,
YOU CAN PEEL IT BEFORE SLICING
OR QUARTERING
AND, OF COURSE,
TRIMMING THE END IF NECESSARY.
NOW THESE ARE
MANAGEABLE PIECES TO COOK.
UNLIKE CAULIFLOWER,
WHICH PREFERS LONG COOKING,
BROCCOLI RESPONDS BEST
TO QUICK APPLICATION
OF HIGH HEAT.
THE REAL CHALLENGE STEMS
FROM THE FACT
THAT FLORETS COOK SO MUCH FASTER
THAN THE STALKS,
WHICH ARE
ACTUALLY MY FAVORITE PART.
NOW STAYING THE COURSE
WITH AMERICAN TRADITIONS,
MOST HOME COOKS
BOIL BROCCOLI TO DEATH,
RESULTING
IN SOME UNHEALTHY ATTITUDES.
PLEASE, DO NOT ASK ME TO EAT
THAT WHICH I HAVE JUST SAID
I AM NOT GOING TO EAT,
BECAUSE YOU ARE BURNING UP TIME.
READ MY LIPS--
NO MORE BROCCOLI!
'TIS A SAD, SAD SCENE,
REPEATED IN MANY HOMES
ACROSS AMERICA.
ALTHOUGH WE SEEK
TO SOFTEN THE PLANT FIBERS
IN ORDER TO MAKE THEM PALATABLE
AND TO MAKE THE NUMEROUS
NUTRIENTS INSIDE AVAILABLE,
BOILING TENDS TO OVER-SOFTEN
THE WALLS OF THE PLANT.
AND ONCE THAT HAPPENS,
IT'S ALL OVER.
¶
¶
TO HELP EXPLAIN
THE DASTARDLY DILEMMA
THAT IS OVERCOOKED BROCCOLI,
WE'VE BROKEN OUT
THE OLD MYSTERY FOOD
SCIENCE THEATER!
INSIDE BROCCOLI, NICE,
BRIGHT GREEN CHLOROPHYLLS
ARE KEPT SEPARATE
FROM ACIDIC ELEMENTS
BY CELL WALLS.
BUT IF YOU OVERCOOK
THE BROCCOLI,
THE CELL WALLS CAN COLLAPSE
AND THE ACIDS CAN ATTACK,
TURNING OUR NICE,
BRIGHT GREEN CHLOROPHYLLS
INTO A SAD, DINGY GRAY,
KIND OF LIKE THAT.
TO ADD INSULT TO INJURY,
WATER-SOLUBLE VITAMINS
AND PHYTOCHEMICALS
RUSH OUT INTO THE WATER,
NEVER TO BE RETURNED.
THANK YOU--WONDERFUL SHOW.
EVEN CAREFUL BLANCHING
TENDS TO DO MORE DAMAGE
THAN GOOD.
STEAMING, ON THE OTHER HAND,
GIVE US MORE CONTROL,
BECAUSE ALTHOUGH IT'S
TECHNICALLY HOTTER
THAN BOILING WATER,
STEAM IS FAR LESS DENSE
AND IT CAN'T
WASH NUTRIENTS AWAY.
BUT STEAMING STILL LEAVES US
IN A LURCH
CONCERNING EQUAL DONENESS, OKAY?
NOW SINCE MOST OF THE NUTRIENTS
ARE IN THE FLORETS,
I SUGGEST
A HYBRID COOKING METHOD.
RATHER THAN USING
A STEAMER BASKET,
WE'LL USE THE STALKS
TO CREATE A PLATFORM
FOR THE FLORETS.
NOW I HAVE HERE
A COUPLE OF BIG STALKS'
WORTH OF BROCCOLI,
MAYBE THREE SMALL ONES.
AND I'VE TRIMMED THEM,
AND I'VE CUT THE STALKS
INTO 1/8- TO 1/4-INCH SLICES.
I'M JUST GONNA LAY THOSE OUT
IN THE BOTTOM OF THE SAUCE PAN--
A SAUCIER, ACTUALLY--
KIND OF A LITTLE PLATFORM.
WE'LL ADD A PINCH OF SALT
AND JUST ENOUGH WATER
TO ALMOST, BUT NOT QUITE,
COVER THE STALKS--
PROBABLY TAKE
ABOUT 1/3 OF A CUP.
THERE. NOW ALL YOU HAVE TO DO
IS ARRANGE THE FLORETS
ON TOP OF THAT.
YOU CAN TRY
TO GET THE STEMS DOWN
OR DO WHAT I DO--
JUST DUMP IT IN THERE.
PERFECT. THERE.
PUT THAT TO HIGH HEAT, COVERED,
AND COOK FOR THREE MINUTES.
THEN DECREASE THE HEAT TO LOW
AND COOK
FOR ANOTHER THREE MINUTES.
YES, KEEP A LID ON THIS.
IT'LL HELP MAINTAIN EVEN COOKING
THROUGHOUT THE PLANT MATTER,
AND THAT MATTERS.
THIS WAY, WE PRESERVE FLAVOR,
ENHANCE TEXTURE
AND SAVE NUTRIENTS.
WHAT NUTRIENTS?
WELL, VITAMINS, FOR ONE.
SPEAKING OF VITAMINS,
LET'S BRING IN TODAY'S GUEST.
STRAIGHT OUT OF POLAND,
THIS BIOCHEMIST
WAS THE FIRST TO ISOLATE
A WATER-SOLUBLE COMPLEX
OF RICE, BRAN, MICRONUTRIENTS,
BACK IN 1912.
HE LATER WENT ON TO FOUND
THE FUNK FOUNDATION
FOR MEDICAL RESEARCH.
HE DIGS ON PARLIAMENT
AND GIRLS WHO WEAR GLASSES.
GIVE A BIG,
FAT "GOOD EATS" WELCOME
TO CASIMIR FUNK!
(cheers and applause)
WELL...
(Polish accent)
HELLO!
GOOD TO MEET YOU, DOCTOR.
THANKS FOR HAVING ME
ON SUCCESSFUL AMERICAN
TV COOKING SHOW.
OF COURSE.
SO YOU DISCOVERED VITAMINS.
THAT'S WHAT THEY SAY.
WELL, FOR OUR AUDIENCE MEMBERS
AT HOME WHO MAY NOT KNOW,
WHAT EXACTLY IS A VITAMIN?
OOH, VERY SIMPLE.
VITAMINS ARE
TINY ORGANIC COMPOUNDS
REQUIRED BY ALL
LIVING ORGANISMS, HUH?
YEAH, WE KNOW NOW
THAT THEY AID IN METABOLISM,
THE CONVERSION OF FAT
AND CARBOHYDRATES TO ENERGY.
AND THEY ALSO ASSIST
IN THE CREATION OF BONE
AND TISSUE.
SO HOW DID YOU MAKE
THIS ASTOUNDING DISCOVERY?
OH, I DISCOVERED
IT WAS THIAMINE,
OR VITAMIN B1,
IN BROWN RICE
THAT CURES
TERRIBLE DISEASE BERIBERI.
VITAMIN C AND VITAMIN D,
LIKE ALL VITAMINS,
CAN BE FOUND
IN FOOD YOU EAT.
WE KNOW NOW
THAT MANY VITAMINS
ARE ACTUALLY CREATED
IN THE HUMAN BODY.
SO TELL ME
ABOUT THAT NAME.
OH, PROFESSOR FUNK?
IT'S A BIG--
YEAH--NO.
"VITAMIN."
OH, WELL, IT'S
SHORT FOR "VITAL AMINES"
BOO! VITAL AMINES.
THAT'S RIGHT.
THEY USED TO THINK
THAT ALL THE VITAMINS CONTAINED
THE CHEMICAL GROUP AMINES,
SO THEY CALLED THEM VITAMINS.
WE KNOW BETTER NOW, SO WE
JUST CALL THEM VITAMINS.
NOW I KNOW THAT, DR. FUNK,
YOU UNFORTUNATELY PASSED AWAY
IN 1967...
CORRECT, YES.
BUT DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING
GOIN' ON THERE
IN THE NETHERWORLD?
OH, YES!
I AM TRYING TO ISOLATE
VITAMIN F--FUNKOMINE!
(cheers and applause)
OH, YEAH!
AH, CASIMIR FUNK,
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN.
ALL RIGHT, YEAH!
GIVE IT TO ME!
ALL RIGHT!
THANKS FOR VISITING.
THANK YOU!
NOW THE TIME IS UP
ON OUR BROCCOLI,
AND YOU CAN SEE IT IS TENDER
YET PLEASINGLY FIRM,
FROM THE TOP OF THE FLORET--
OW--TO THE BOTTOM OF THE STALK.
NOW THERE'S A LITTLE BIT
OF WATER LEFT IN THE POT.
WE CAN TURN THAT INTO A SAUCE
SIMPLY BY MIXING IN
A COUPLE OF TABLESPOONS
OF UNSALTED BUTTER
AT THE LAST MOMENT.
SALT AND PEPPER, OF COURSE,
CAN BE ADDED AT YOUR DISCRETION.
NOW ABOUT ALL THAT NUTRITION--
BROCCOLI CONTAINS
ALMOST AS MUCH CALCIUM AS MILK.
IT HAS MORE VITAMIN C IN IT
THAN AN ORANGE.
IT ALSO CONTAINS
VITAMINS K AND A.
IT'S AN EXCELLENT SOURCE
OF DIETARY FIBER,
FOLATE AND RIBOFLAVIN,
IRON, POTASSIUM, MANGANESE
AND PHOSPHORUS.
IT ALSO CONTAINS
SOME VERY SPECIAL ANTIOXIDANTS
THAT CAN JUMP-START
WHAT'S CALLED
PHASE II DETOXIFICATION ENZYMES,
WHICH HAVE THE POWER
TO KIND OF FLUSH
POTENTIALLY HARMFUL
FREE RADICALS...
(hard rock guitar riff plays)
FROM YOUR BODY.
AND THAT QUALIFIES BROCCOLI
AS A BONA FIDE SUPER FOOD,
NOT TO MENTION GOOD EATS.
TAKE A BATH. CUT YOUR HAIR.
FIND A JOB.
¶
¶
OKAY, AMERICA,
LET'S TALK ABOUT THE BITTERNESS.
BROCCOLI AND ITS KIN
CONTAIN COMPOUNDS
WHICH ARE CLOSELY RELATED
TO THOSE IN MUSTARD GAS--
THE ORIGINAL CHEMICAL WEAPON.
NOW MOST OF US
WITH AN AVERAGE NUMBER
OF TASTE BUDS
FIND THIS PLEASANT.
HOWEVER, ABOUT 25%
OF THE U.S. POPULATION
ARE CONSIDERED SUPER TASTERS.
THAT MEANS THAT INSTEAD
OF THE NORMAL COMPLEMENT
OF TASTE BUDS,
THEIR TONGUES HOUSE EVEN MORE
PER SQUARE INCH,
AND THEY CAN TASTE FLAVORS
MORE INTENSELY
THAN THE REST OF US.
THAT MAKES THEM MORE SENSITIVE
TO THE BITTER NOTES IN BROCCOLI.
HOWEVER, THERE IS A WAY
AROUND THIS...
(crunching sound)
OW! HEY!
ROASTING.
DRY HEAT HAS THE ABILITY
TO TRIGGER CHEMICAL CHANGES
THAT INTENSIFY
THE NATURAL SUGARS IN BROCCOLI,
WHICH CAN BALANCE OUT
ANY POSSIBLE BITTERNESS.
STEP ONE--HOT BOX--
425--YES, IT'S A LOT OF HEAT,
BUT IT WON'T BE IN THERE
FOR LONG.
NOW I HAVE A POUND
OF BROCCOLI HERE,
WHICH HAS BEEN TRIMMED
AND RINSED.
NOW THIS TIME, WE'RE GONNA NEED
BITE-SIZE PIECES,
SO ANY FLORETS THAT ARE
MORE THAN MODEST MOUTHFULS
WILL NEED TO BE SPLIT DOWN.
THE STALKS SHOULD BE CUT
INTO 1/8-INCH-THICK SLICES.
NOW WE'RE GONNA TOSS THIS
WITH 2 TABLESPOONS OF OLIVE OIL
IN WHICH I HAVE TWO CLOVES
OF MINCED GARLIC,
1/2 TEASPOON OF KOSHER SALT
AND 1/4 TEASPOON
OF FRESHLY GROUND BLACK PEPPER.
NOW TOSS THAT.
THEN WE'RE JUST GONNA
SET THIS ASIDE.
NOW CHANGING THE TEXTURE
OF A FOOD
CAN CHANGE THE FLAVOR
BY ALTERING THE WAY
THE TASTE BUDS PERCEIVE
THE CHEMICALS INVOLVED.
ADDING
SOME JAPANESE BREADCRUMBS
TO THE OCCASION
WILL DO JUST THAT.
AND THEY TASTE DARN GOOD.
NOW DON'T JUST TOSS THESE CRUMBS
WITH THE BROCCOLI.
WITHOUT A LITTLE PRETOASTING,
THEY WON'T BROWN,
DUE TO SURFACE MOISTURE.
SO SPREAD OUT--
I'LL SAY 1/3 OF A CUP OF THEM
INTO A 9x13 METAL CAKE PAN
AND TOAST IN THE HEATING OVEN
FOR EXACTLY TWO MINUTES.
WHEN THE BREADCRUMBS
LOOK NICE AND TOASTY,
TOSS THEM
WITH THE REST
OF THE BROCCOLI MIXTURE...
(sighs)
TO COAT--OW, HOT.
AH, THERE--
PUT IT BACK IN THE PAN,
AHH, AND ROAST
ANOTHER EIGHT TO TEN MINUTES
OR UNTIL THE BROCCOLI
IS JUST TENDER.
¶
UPON EXITING THE HOT BOX,
I LIKE TO TRANSFER THE BROCCOLI
INTO ANOTHER BOWL
KIND OF JUST TO KNOCK DOWN
THE HEAT A LITTLE BIT.
AND TOSS IN
1/4 CUP
OF SHARP CHEDDAR CHEESE.
NOW YOU COULD USE
JUST ABOUT ANY CHEESE.
YOU COULD EVEN USE
PARMESAN HERE,
BUT I LIKE IT SHARP
AND A LITTLE ON THE GOOEY SIDE.
NOW WHEN THIS COOLS,
YOU CAN COVER AND REFRIGERATE
FOR UP TO TWO DAYS.
IT WILL ONLY GET BETTER
WITH AGE.
ME, THOUGH, I KIND OF LIKE IT
WHEN IT'S ON THE HOT SIDE.
NOW I REALIZE
THAT SOME FOLKS BELIEVE
THAT WHEN IT COMES TO BROCCOLI,
AT LEAST NUTRITIONALLY
WHEN IT COMES TO BROCCOLI,
THAT RAW
IS REALLY WHERE IT IS AT.
BUT MY PROBLEM
IS JUST THAT RAW BROCCOLI
SEEMS TO ONLY HAVE
ONE MANIFESTATION
AND IT ALWAYS SEEMS--
WHAT'S THIS?
AN INVITATION
TO MY NEIGHBOR'S PARTY!
TODAY! THAT'S FUNNY,
I NEVER GET INVITED TO--
THING, THIS ADDRESS
IS DOWN THE STREET.
YOU KNOW THAT STEALING MAIL
IS A FEDERAL OFFENSE.
OH, WELL, MAYBE THEY'LL
JUST LET YOU BY
WITH A SLAP ON THE WRIST.
(tray clatters)
TOUCHY LITTLE GUY.
OH, WELL, NO REASON
TO LET THIS GO TO WASTE.
¶
("Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy"
playing)
THERE IT IS. I KNEW IT!
WHEREVER MORE THAN SEVEN
SUBURBANITES ARE GATHERED,
THERE'S GONNA BE
A CRUDITéS PLATTER
FEATURING RAW BROCCOLI AND--OH!
SURE, IT'S ARMED
WITH A FULL COMPLEMENT OF
VITAMINS AND MINERALS,
BUT WHAT GOOD IS THAT
IF YOU CAN'T CHOKE IT DOWN
WITHOUT A TABLESPOON
OF HIGH-FAT DRESSING
OR GREEN STUFF.
YOU KNOW, THERE HAS TO BE
ANOTHER WAY,
AND I'M GONNA FIND IT.
¶
IF YOU ASK ME,
THE BEST WAY TO MAKE
RAW BROCCOLI PALATABLE
IS TO THINK COLESLAW.
IN OTHER WORDS,
WE ARE GOING TO CUT
THIS BROCCOLI WAFER THIN
AND DRESS IT IN A SAUCE
TANGY ENOUGH
TO KEEP
THE SALIVARY GLANDS ENGAGED
THROUGHOUT
THE EATING EXPERIENCE.
SO WE WILL BEGIN
WITH THE DRESSING.
WHISK TOGETHER
1 TABLESPOON
OF WHITE WINE VINEGAR
WITH THE ZEST OF ONE LEMON--
THERE WE GO--
A TABLESPOON
OF FRESHLY SQUEEZED LEMON JUICE,
2 TEASPOONS, OR THEREABOUTS,
OF DIJON MUSTARD--
THERE WE GO--
A TEASPOON OF KOSHER SALT--
CLOSE ENOUGH--
AND A PINCH OR TWO
OF FRESHLY GROUND BLACK PEPPER.
THERE. NOW AS SOON
AS THAT IS UNIFORM,
WE'LL DRIZZLE IN
1/4 OF A CUP OF OLIVE OIL--
WHATEVER KIND OF OLIVE OIL
YOU LIKE TO USE.
THAT'S RIGHT,
THIS IS A STANDARD
VINAIGRETTE PROCEDURE,
BECAUSE IT'S
A STANDARD VINAIGRETTE,
JUST EXTRA TANGY.
NOW GETTING THIS
REALLY, REALLY WAFER THIN
IS GOING TO REQUIRE THE USE
OF ONE OF THESE,
OR SOMETHING LIKE IT--
A MANDOLINE OR A V-SLICER.
BUT IN ORDER TO GET IT
REALLY ON THERE,
WE WILL CUT THIS DOWN
INTO QUARTERS, OR THEREABOUTS.
WE WANT AS MUCH OF THE STEM
AS POSSIBLE.
STEM FIRST AND, OF COURSE,
AS ALWAYS,
WE WILL EMPLOY THE HAND GUARD.
NOW DON'T WORRY. THIS IS
GOING TO BE A LITTLE BIT MESSY,
BUT IT'S GONNA BE WORTH IT.
JUST GO SLOWLY.
SINCE SOME OF THE PIECES ARE
STILL KIND OF ON THE LONG SIDE,
GO AHEAD
AND JUST CHOP THROUGH THAT
THREE OR FOUR TIMES,
A COUPLE TIMES
IN EACH DIRECTION.
AND THEN MOVE THAT OFF
INTO YOUR BOWL
RIGHT ON TOP OF THE DRESSING.
TOSS AND REFRIGERATE
FOR AT LEAST ONE HOUR
BEFORE SERVING.
NOW THAT THIS HAS MARINATED,
WE CAN ADD A FEW
FINAL FLAVOR COMBINATIONS--
6 OUNCES OF EITHER CHERRY
OR GRAPE TOMATOES, SLICED,
3 OUNCES BY WEIGHT
OF TOASTED NUTS.
YOU COULD USE PECANS.
I PREFER HAZELNUTS.
AND 2 TABLESPOONS
OF BASIL CHIFFONADE--
THAT'S FRENCH
FOR "LITTLE RIBBONS," YOU KNOW.
IN THEY GO
AND TOSS TO COMBINE.
("Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy"
playing)
JUST AS I SUSPECTED,
NOBODY TOUCHED IT.
NOW JUST LET THIS SIT
FOR ABOUT 15 MINUTES
BEFORE SERVING,
AND THEN JUST WAIT
FOR A GRATEFUL WORLD.
(indistinct conversation)
AND SO BROCCOLI,
VINDICATED AT LAST,
IS RELEASED FROM THE VEGETAL
HALL OF HORRORS.
ALTHOUGH WE CAN NEVER ERASE
THOSE LOST YEARS OF LOATHING,
WE CAN HOPE FOR A NEW DAY
IN WHICH CHILDREN
AND PRESIDENTS ALIKE
RIGHTLY BEG FOR BROCCOLI.
ARE THERE STILL
PLENTY OF EDIBLE MONSTERS
LURKING OUT IN THE DARKNESS?
INDEED THERE ARE.
BUT THEY'LL HAVE TO WAIT
FOR THEIR OWN EPISODES
OF "GOOD EATS."
Closed Captions provided
by Scripps Networks, LLC.
Captioned by
Closed Captioning Services, Inc.
GOOD EVENING
AND WELCOME ONCE AGAIN
TO THE FOOD GALLERY.
OVER THE YEARS,
WE'VE MANAGED TO SHUT DOWN
MANY OF THE EXHIBITS HERE
IN THE VEGETAL HALL OF HORRORS.
SPINACH, PEAS, BEETS,
DARK, LEAFY GREENS
DON'T LIVE HERE ANYMORE,
BUT THERE IS ONE INMATE
WHO SEEMS DETERMINED
TO REMAIN ON PERMANENT DISPLAY--
BRASSICA OLERACEA--
BROCCOLI.
FALSELY ACCUSED OF BEING BITTER,
LIMP OR BLAND AND BORING,
THIS FLOWERING BODY
HAS GARNERED THE IRE
OF PRESIDENTS
AND PUBESCENTS ALIKE.
YOU SEE, BROCCOLI
ENTERED THIS COUNTRY
RATHER LATE
IN THE IMMIGRATION GAME,
AT A TIME WHEN THE COUNTRY'S
COLLECTIVE HEART
WAS HARDENING AGAINST NEWCOMERS.
THIS HATEFUL SENTIMENT
WAS BEST VOICED
IN AN INSIGHTFUL CARTOON
FROM A 1928 EDITION
OF "THE NEW YORKER,"
DEPICTING A DOMESTIC SCENE
IN WHICH BROCCOLI WAS MAKING
A HOPEFUL DEBUT.
TRY IT, DEAR.
IT'S CALLED BROCCOLI.
I SAY IT'S SPINACH,
AND I SAY TO (beep) WITH IT!
(gasps)
FEAR OF THE UNKNOWN
OFTEN LEADS
TO DESTRUCTIVE ATTITUDES
AND ACTIVITIES.
SIMPLY PREPARED, BROCCOLI
CAN BE EVERY BIT AS TASTY
AS APPLE PIE--
DIFFERENT, BUT DELICIOUS.
IT MAY HAVE ONCE BEEN BANNED
FROM "AIR FORCE ONE,"
BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN
THAT BROCCOLI IS NOT...
¶
THE WORD "BROCCOLI"
MEANS "LITTLE ARMS" IN ITALIAN,
AND IT IS THAT CHARACTERISTIC
WHICH MAKES IT POSSIBLE
FOR YOU AND I TO SEPARATE
BROCCOLI FROM ITS KIN,
SUCH AS CAULIFLOWER,
BRUSSELS SPROUTS,
KALE AND REGULAR OLD CABBAGE,
WHICH ARE SO GENETICALLY CLOSE
TO BROCCOLI,
THAT WHEN BOTANISTS TRY
TO JUSTIFY THEIR EXISTENCE,
THEY...
BUT THEN WAIT,
IF THIS IS CABBAGE
AND THIS IS CABBAGE,
AND--BUT THIS IS BROCCOLI,
BUT IT--BUT THAT MEANS
THAT THIS IS BROCCOLI,
SO IT MUST BE CABBAGE, TOO!
(laughs maniacally)
I THINK THE SCIENTIFIC TERM
IS "BLOW A GASKET."
NOW IT IS BELIEVED
THAT BROCCOLI WAS DEVELOPED
MORE THAN 2,000 YEARS AGO,
FIRST BY ETRUSCAN GARDENERS
AND THEN BY ROMANS,
WHO WERE BIG BROCCOLI FANS.
IN FACT, DRUSUS,
THE OLDEST SON OF TIBERIUS,
I THINK IT IS,
ATE NOTHING BUT BROCCOLI
FOR A MONTH
UNTIL IT LITERALLY CHANGED
HIS WATER GREEN.
BROCCOLI'S BIG BREAK
IN THIS COUNTRY
CAME WHEN A COUPLE
OF ITALIAN BROTHERS
BEGAN GROWING IT IN CALIFORNIA
IN THE EARLY 20th CENTURY.
TODAY, ROUGHLY 90%
OF THE U.S. CROP
COMES FROM THE GOLDEN STATE.
THE PROBLEM IS I CAN'T FIND
ANY OF THE CROP AROUND HERE.
WHERE IS THE BROCCOLI?
CAN I HELP YOU?
WELL, I CAN'T
HELP BUT NOTICE
THAT YOU'RE
ARRANGING VEGETABLES.
VEGETABLES? HA!
GIVE IT SOME TIME
AND ALL THESE WILL EXPLODE
INTO BEAUTIFUL, PRECIOUS,
PRETTY FLOWERS LIKE THESE.
UH-HUH. UM, BOTANICALLY,
SHE'S RIGHT.
MOST VARIETIES OF BROCCOLI
ARE FLOWERING BODIES,
ALTHOUGH THERE ARE
SOME HEADING VARIETIES
WHICH ARE MORE CLOSELY RELATED
TO CAULIFLOWER.
OH, I HAVE SOME LOVELY
CAULIFLOWER CENTERPIECES
RIGHT OVER HERE.
YES, VERY...
ARTISTIC.
AND I SEE THAT YOU ALSO HAVE
SOME OF BROCCOLI'S MORE
CROSSBRED COUSINS HERE AS WELL.
I'VE GOT
SOME BROCCOLI RABE...
UM--VERY BITTER
YET STRANGELY DELICIOUS--
CLOSELY RELATED TO TURNIP,
I BELIEVE.
AND BROCCOLINI...
A HYBRID CROSS BETWEEN BROCCOLI
AND CHINESE KALE.
AND I SEE YOU HAVE SOME
OF THIS STRANGE BUT WONDERFUL
BROCCOLI ROMANESCO.
NO, THIS ONE CAN'T BE
A VEGETABLE.
LOOK HOW PRETTY IT IS--
ALL THOSE TINY, LITTLE CONES.
IT LOOKS
LIKE A MAGIC FAIRY SANDCASTLE.
YES, DOESN'T IT?
WELL, IF YOU ASK ME,
NO ONE IS GONNA WANT
TO EAT THAT,
BECAUSE ONCE IT FLOWERS,
BROCCOLI IS EXTREMELY BITTER.
WELL, I DIDN'T ASK YOU!
BUT IF YOU ASK ME, YOU SHOULD
STOP THINKING SO MUCH.
STOP AND SMELL
THE FLOWERS!
COME HERE.
WHEN SHOPPING
FOR REGULAR BROCCOLI,
YOU WANT BUDS
THAT ARE FIRMLY CLOSED,
FLORETS THAT ARE
TIGHTLY GROUPED,
AND YOU WANT
A NICE, BRIGHT GREEN COLOR--
NO SPLOTCHES ANYWHERE.
ALSO CHECK OUT
THE BASE OF THE STEM.
IT SHOULD BE MOIST.
IF IT'S WHITE
AND KIND OF CRUSTY,
THAT MEANS
THAT SOME OF THE SUGAR IN HERE
HAS CONVERTED TO LIGNIN,
WHICH IS A KEY INGREDIENT
IN WOOD--NOT GOOD EATS.
THIS IS IDEAL.
DUE TO ITS FLORAL NATURE,
BROCCOLI HAS A TENDENCY TO SPOIL
MORE QUICKLY
THAN OTHER VEGETABLES,
BUT A FEW DAYS HERE
IN THE CHILL CHEST
WILL DO NO HARM.
THAT'S
WHY YOU SHOULD--
DON'T PUT YOUR BROCCOLI
UP HERE!
IT'S YOU!
FOLLOW ME
TO A FAR, FAR BETTER PLACE!
HEY!
IF YOU WANT THAT BROCCOLI
TO HAVE A CHANCE AT SURVIVAL,
YOU'LL PUT IT IN THIS DRAWER,
WHICH THANKS TO HIGHER HUMIDITY,
KEEPS VEGGIES CRISPER,
FRESHER AND FIRMER!
WELL, I DON'T SEE
A HUMIDIFIER IN HERE.
OF COURSE YOU DON'T,
LUMMOX!
IT USES A GASKET
TO TRAP THE MOISTURE
RELEASED BY THE PRODUCE ITSELF.
OKAY, THEN WHAT'S
THIS LITTLE SLIDER FOR?
IT OPENS AND CLOSES
THE GASKET,
ALLOWING FOR MORE
OR LESS AIRFLOW.
SET IT TO LOW AND AIR
WILL CIRCULATE IN AND OUT--
BEST FOR FRUITS
PROTECTED BY THICK SKINS.
FLIP IT TO HIGH,
AND YOUR VEGGIES
WILL FEEL MORE AT HOME.
AND, OF COURSE,
THE DRAWER CONFIGURATION
HELPS PREVENT COLD AIR
FROM ESCAPING EVERY TIME
SOME IDIOT LIKE YOU STANDS
AROUND WITH THE DOOR OPEN!
WELL, MOST LUMMOXES
PROBABLY DON'T STAND AROUND
TALKING TO YARD ORNAMENTS
IN HERE.
ANYTHING ELSE?
PLASTIC BAGS ARE FINE,
BUT BE SURE TO PUNCH A FEW HOLES
IN THERE TO LET MOISTURE ESCAPE.
CONDENSATION IS THE BANE
OF FRESH VEGGIES,
DON'T YOU KNOW?
BY THE WAY, WHEN'S THE LAST TIME
YOU CLEANED UP IN HERE?
A GOOD SCRUBBING
EVERY OTHER MONTH
WILL KEEP MOLD
AND OTHER NASTINESS AWAY.
(mumbling loudly)
(German accent)
PERHAPS YOU NEED
TO SPEND A LITTLE TIME
IN THE COOLER.
HOW DARE YOU TRY
TO SILENCE THE GNOME!
ALTHOUGH I'M SURE
THERE'S MORE THAN ONE WAY
TO TRIM A BROCCOLI CROWN,
I PREFER TO DO IT
BY FLIPPING IT UPSIDE DOWN.
JUST USE A PARING KNIFE
TO MAKE QUICK DIAGONAL CUTS,
WHICH WILL GIVE YOU
A NICE HARVEST OF THE FLORETS.
IF THE STALK SEEMS DRY OR TOUGH,
YOU CAN PEEL IT BEFORE SLICING
OR QUARTERING
AND, OF COURSE,
TRIMMING THE END IF NECESSARY.
NOW THESE ARE
MANAGEABLE PIECES TO COOK.
UNLIKE CAULIFLOWER,
WHICH PREFERS LONG COOKING,
BROCCOLI RESPONDS BEST
TO QUICK APPLICATION
OF HIGH HEAT.
THE REAL CHALLENGE STEMS
FROM THE FACT
THAT FLORETS COOK SO MUCH FASTER
THAN THE STALKS,
WHICH ARE
ACTUALLY MY FAVORITE PART.
NOW STAYING THE COURSE
WITH AMERICAN TRADITIONS,
MOST HOME COOKS
BOIL BROCCOLI TO DEATH,
RESULTING
IN SOME UNHEALTHY ATTITUDES.
PLEASE, DO NOT ASK ME TO EAT
THAT WHICH I HAVE JUST SAID
I AM NOT GOING TO EAT,
BECAUSE YOU ARE BURNING UP TIME.
READ MY LIPS--
NO MORE BROCCOLI!
'TIS A SAD, SAD SCENE,
REPEATED IN MANY HOMES
ACROSS AMERICA.
ALTHOUGH WE SEEK
TO SOFTEN THE PLANT FIBERS
IN ORDER TO MAKE THEM PALATABLE
AND TO MAKE THE NUMEROUS
NUTRIENTS INSIDE AVAILABLE,
BOILING TENDS TO OVER-SOFTEN
THE WALLS OF THE PLANT.
AND ONCE THAT HAPPENS,
IT'S ALL OVER.
¶
¶
TO HELP EXPLAIN
THE DASTARDLY DILEMMA
THAT IS OVERCOOKED BROCCOLI,
WE'VE BROKEN OUT
THE OLD MYSTERY FOOD
SCIENCE THEATER!
INSIDE BROCCOLI, NICE,
BRIGHT GREEN CHLOROPHYLLS
ARE KEPT SEPARATE
FROM ACIDIC ELEMENTS
BY CELL WALLS.
BUT IF YOU OVERCOOK
THE BROCCOLI,
THE CELL WALLS CAN COLLAPSE
AND THE ACIDS CAN ATTACK,
TURNING OUR NICE,
BRIGHT GREEN CHLOROPHYLLS
INTO A SAD, DINGY GRAY,
KIND OF LIKE THAT.
TO ADD INSULT TO INJURY,
WATER-SOLUBLE VITAMINS
AND PHYTOCHEMICALS
RUSH OUT INTO THE WATER,
NEVER TO BE RETURNED.
THANK YOU--WONDERFUL SHOW.
EVEN CAREFUL BLANCHING
TENDS TO DO MORE DAMAGE
THAN GOOD.
STEAMING, ON THE OTHER HAND,
GIVE US MORE CONTROL,
BECAUSE ALTHOUGH IT'S
TECHNICALLY HOTTER
THAN BOILING WATER,
STEAM IS FAR LESS DENSE
AND IT CAN'T
WASH NUTRIENTS AWAY.
BUT STEAMING STILL LEAVES US
IN A LURCH
CONCERNING EQUAL DONENESS, OKAY?
NOW SINCE MOST OF THE NUTRIENTS
ARE IN THE FLORETS,
I SUGGEST
A HYBRID COOKING METHOD.
RATHER THAN USING
A STEAMER BASKET,
WE'LL USE THE STALKS
TO CREATE A PLATFORM
FOR THE FLORETS.
NOW I HAVE HERE
A COUPLE OF BIG STALKS'
WORTH OF BROCCOLI,
MAYBE THREE SMALL ONES.
AND I'VE TRIMMED THEM,
AND I'VE CUT THE STALKS
INTO 1/8- TO 1/4-INCH SLICES.
I'M JUST GONNA LAY THOSE OUT
IN THE BOTTOM OF THE SAUCE PAN--
A SAUCIER, ACTUALLY--
KIND OF A LITTLE PLATFORM.
WE'LL ADD A PINCH OF SALT
AND JUST ENOUGH WATER
TO ALMOST, BUT NOT QUITE,
COVER THE STALKS--
PROBABLY TAKE
ABOUT 1/3 OF A CUP.
THERE. NOW ALL YOU HAVE TO DO
IS ARRANGE THE FLORETS
ON TOP OF THAT.
YOU CAN TRY
TO GET THE STEMS DOWN
OR DO WHAT I DO--
JUST DUMP IT IN THERE.
PERFECT. THERE.
PUT THAT TO HIGH HEAT, COVERED,
AND COOK FOR THREE MINUTES.
THEN DECREASE THE HEAT TO LOW
AND COOK
FOR ANOTHER THREE MINUTES.
YES, KEEP A LID ON THIS.
IT'LL HELP MAINTAIN EVEN COOKING
THROUGHOUT THE PLANT MATTER,
AND THAT MATTERS.
THIS WAY, WE PRESERVE FLAVOR,
ENHANCE TEXTURE
AND SAVE NUTRIENTS.
WHAT NUTRIENTS?
WELL, VITAMINS, FOR ONE.
SPEAKING OF VITAMINS,
LET'S BRING IN TODAY'S GUEST.
STRAIGHT OUT OF POLAND,
THIS BIOCHEMIST
WAS THE FIRST TO ISOLATE
A WATER-SOLUBLE COMPLEX
OF RICE, BRAN, MICRONUTRIENTS,
BACK IN 1912.
HE LATER WENT ON TO FOUND
THE FUNK FOUNDATION
FOR MEDICAL RESEARCH.
HE DIGS ON PARLIAMENT
AND GIRLS WHO WEAR GLASSES.
GIVE A BIG,
FAT "GOOD EATS" WELCOME
TO CASIMIR FUNK!
(cheers and applause)
WELL...
(Polish accent)
HELLO!
GOOD TO MEET YOU, DOCTOR.
THANKS FOR HAVING ME
ON SUCCESSFUL AMERICAN
TV COOKING SHOW.
OF COURSE.
SO YOU DISCOVERED VITAMINS.
THAT'S WHAT THEY SAY.
WELL, FOR OUR AUDIENCE MEMBERS
AT HOME WHO MAY NOT KNOW,
WHAT EXACTLY IS A VITAMIN?
OOH, VERY SIMPLE.
VITAMINS ARE
TINY ORGANIC COMPOUNDS
REQUIRED BY ALL
LIVING ORGANISMS, HUH?
YEAH, WE KNOW NOW
THAT THEY AID IN METABOLISM,
THE CONVERSION OF FAT
AND CARBOHYDRATES TO ENERGY.
AND THEY ALSO ASSIST
IN THE CREATION OF BONE
AND TISSUE.
SO HOW DID YOU MAKE
THIS ASTOUNDING DISCOVERY?
OH, I DISCOVERED
IT WAS THIAMINE,
OR VITAMIN B1,
IN BROWN RICE
THAT CURES
TERRIBLE DISEASE BERIBERI.
VITAMIN C AND VITAMIN D,
LIKE ALL VITAMINS,
CAN BE FOUND
IN FOOD YOU EAT.
WE KNOW NOW
THAT MANY VITAMINS
ARE ACTUALLY CREATED
IN THE HUMAN BODY.
SO TELL ME
ABOUT THAT NAME.
OH, PROFESSOR FUNK?
IT'S A BIG--
YEAH--NO.
"VITAMIN."
OH, WELL, IT'S
SHORT FOR "VITAL AMINES"
BOO! VITAL AMINES.
THAT'S RIGHT.
THEY USED TO THINK
THAT ALL THE VITAMINS CONTAINED
THE CHEMICAL GROUP AMINES,
SO THEY CALLED THEM VITAMINS.
WE KNOW BETTER NOW, SO WE
JUST CALL THEM VITAMINS.
NOW I KNOW THAT, DR. FUNK,
YOU UNFORTUNATELY PASSED AWAY
IN 1967...
CORRECT, YES.
BUT DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING
GOIN' ON THERE
IN THE NETHERWORLD?
OH, YES!
I AM TRYING TO ISOLATE
VITAMIN F--FUNKOMINE!
(cheers and applause)
OH, YEAH!
AH, CASIMIR FUNK,
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN.
ALL RIGHT, YEAH!
GIVE IT TO ME!
ALL RIGHT!
THANKS FOR VISITING.
THANK YOU!
NOW THE TIME IS UP
ON OUR BROCCOLI,
AND YOU CAN SEE IT IS TENDER
YET PLEASINGLY FIRM,
FROM THE TOP OF THE FLORET--
OW--TO THE BOTTOM OF THE STALK.
NOW THERE'S A LITTLE BIT
OF WATER LEFT IN THE POT.
WE CAN TURN THAT INTO A SAUCE
SIMPLY BY MIXING IN
A COUPLE OF TABLESPOONS
OF UNSALTED BUTTER
AT THE LAST MOMENT.
SALT AND PEPPER, OF COURSE,
CAN BE ADDED AT YOUR DISCRETION.
NOW ABOUT ALL THAT NUTRITION--
BROCCOLI CONTAINS
ALMOST AS MUCH CALCIUM AS MILK.
IT HAS MORE VITAMIN C IN IT
THAN AN ORANGE.
IT ALSO CONTAINS
VITAMINS K AND A.
IT'S AN EXCELLENT SOURCE
OF DIETARY FIBER,
FOLATE AND RIBOFLAVIN,
IRON, POTASSIUM, MANGANESE
AND PHOSPHORUS.
IT ALSO CONTAINS
SOME VERY SPECIAL ANTIOXIDANTS
THAT CAN JUMP-START
WHAT'S CALLED
PHASE II DETOXIFICATION ENZYMES,
WHICH HAVE THE POWER
TO KIND OF FLUSH
POTENTIALLY HARMFUL
FREE RADICALS...
(hard rock guitar riff plays)
FROM YOUR BODY.
AND THAT QUALIFIES BROCCOLI
AS A BONA FIDE SUPER FOOD,
NOT TO MENTION GOOD EATS.
TAKE A BATH. CUT YOUR HAIR.
FIND A JOB.
¶
¶
OKAY, AMERICA,
LET'S TALK ABOUT THE BITTERNESS.
BROCCOLI AND ITS KIN
CONTAIN COMPOUNDS
WHICH ARE CLOSELY RELATED
TO THOSE IN MUSTARD GAS--
THE ORIGINAL CHEMICAL WEAPON.
NOW MOST OF US
WITH AN AVERAGE NUMBER
OF TASTE BUDS
FIND THIS PLEASANT.
HOWEVER, ABOUT 25%
OF THE U.S. POPULATION
ARE CONSIDERED SUPER TASTERS.
THAT MEANS THAT INSTEAD
OF THE NORMAL COMPLEMENT
OF TASTE BUDS,
THEIR TONGUES HOUSE EVEN MORE
PER SQUARE INCH,
AND THEY CAN TASTE FLAVORS
MORE INTENSELY
THAN THE REST OF US.
THAT MAKES THEM MORE SENSITIVE
TO THE BITTER NOTES IN BROCCOLI.
HOWEVER, THERE IS A WAY
AROUND THIS...
(crunching sound)
OW! HEY!
ROASTING.
DRY HEAT HAS THE ABILITY
TO TRIGGER CHEMICAL CHANGES
THAT INTENSIFY
THE NATURAL SUGARS IN BROCCOLI,
WHICH CAN BALANCE OUT
ANY POSSIBLE BITTERNESS.
STEP ONE--HOT BOX--
425--YES, IT'S A LOT OF HEAT,
BUT IT WON'T BE IN THERE
FOR LONG.
NOW I HAVE A POUND
OF BROCCOLI HERE,
WHICH HAS BEEN TRIMMED
AND RINSED.
NOW THIS TIME, WE'RE GONNA NEED
BITE-SIZE PIECES,
SO ANY FLORETS THAT ARE
MORE THAN MODEST MOUTHFULS
WILL NEED TO BE SPLIT DOWN.
THE STALKS SHOULD BE CUT
INTO 1/8-INCH-THICK SLICES.
NOW WE'RE GONNA TOSS THIS
WITH 2 TABLESPOONS OF OLIVE OIL
IN WHICH I HAVE TWO CLOVES
OF MINCED GARLIC,
1/2 TEASPOON OF KOSHER SALT
AND 1/4 TEASPOON
OF FRESHLY GROUND BLACK PEPPER.
NOW TOSS THAT.
THEN WE'RE JUST GONNA
SET THIS ASIDE.
NOW CHANGING THE TEXTURE
OF A FOOD
CAN CHANGE THE FLAVOR
BY ALTERING THE WAY
THE TASTE BUDS PERCEIVE
THE CHEMICALS INVOLVED.
ADDING
SOME JAPANESE BREADCRUMBS
TO THE OCCASION
WILL DO JUST THAT.
AND THEY TASTE DARN GOOD.
NOW DON'T JUST TOSS THESE CRUMBS
WITH THE BROCCOLI.
WITHOUT A LITTLE PRETOASTING,
THEY WON'T BROWN,
DUE TO SURFACE MOISTURE.
SO SPREAD OUT--
I'LL SAY 1/3 OF A CUP OF THEM
INTO A 9x13 METAL CAKE PAN
AND TOAST IN THE HEATING OVEN
FOR EXACTLY TWO MINUTES.
WHEN THE BREADCRUMBS
LOOK NICE AND TOASTY,
TOSS THEM
WITH THE REST
OF THE BROCCOLI MIXTURE...
(sighs)
TO COAT--OW, HOT.
AH, THERE--
PUT IT BACK IN THE PAN,
AHH, AND ROAST
ANOTHER EIGHT TO TEN MINUTES
OR UNTIL THE BROCCOLI
IS JUST TENDER.
¶
UPON EXITING THE HOT BOX,
I LIKE TO TRANSFER THE BROCCOLI
INTO ANOTHER BOWL
KIND OF JUST TO KNOCK DOWN
THE HEAT A LITTLE BIT.
AND TOSS IN
1/4 CUP
OF SHARP CHEDDAR CHEESE.
NOW YOU COULD USE
JUST ABOUT ANY CHEESE.
YOU COULD EVEN USE
PARMESAN HERE,
BUT I LIKE IT SHARP
AND A LITTLE ON THE GOOEY SIDE.
NOW WHEN THIS COOLS,
YOU CAN COVER AND REFRIGERATE
FOR UP TO TWO DAYS.
IT WILL ONLY GET BETTER
WITH AGE.
ME, THOUGH, I KIND OF LIKE IT
WHEN IT'S ON THE HOT SIDE.
NOW I REALIZE
THAT SOME FOLKS BELIEVE
THAT WHEN IT COMES TO BROCCOLI,
AT LEAST NUTRITIONALLY
WHEN IT COMES TO BROCCOLI,
THAT RAW
IS REALLY WHERE IT IS AT.
BUT MY PROBLEM
IS JUST THAT RAW BROCCOLI
SEEMS TO ONLY HAVE
ONE MANIFESTATION
AND IT ALWAYS SEEMS--
WHAT'S THIS?
AN INVITATION
TO MY NEIGHBOR'S PARTY!
TODAY! THAT'S FUNNY,
I NEVER GET INVITED TO--
THING, THIS ADDRESS
IS DOWN THE STREET.
YOU KNOW THAT STEALING MAIL
IS A FEDERAL OFFENSE.
OH, WELL, MAYBE THEY'LL
JUST LET YOU BY
WITH A SLAP ON THE WRIST.
(tray clatters)
TOUCHY LITTLE GUY.
OH, WELL, NO REASON
TO LET THIS GO TO WASTE.
¶
("Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy"
playing)
THERE IT IS. I KNEW IT!
WHEREVER MORE THAN SEVEN
SUBURBANITES ARE GATHERED,
THERE'S GONNA BE
A CRUDITéS PLATTER
FEATURING RAW BROCCOLI AND--OH!
SURE, IT'S ARMED
WITH A FULL COMPLEMENT OF
VITAMINS AND MINERALS,
BUT WHAT GOOD IS THAT
IF YOU CAN'T CHOKE IT DOWN
WITHOUT A TABLESPOON
OF HIGH-FAT DRESSING
OR GREEN STUFF.
YOU KNOW, THERE HAS TO BE
ANOTHER WAY,
AND I'M GONNA FIND IT.
¶
IF YOU ASK ME,
THE BEST WAY TO MAKE
RAW BROCCOLI PALATABLE
IS TO THINK COLESLAW.
IN OTHER WORDS,
WE ARE GOING TO CUT
THIS BROCCOLI WAFER THIN
AND DRESS IT IN A SAUCE
TANGY ENOUGH
TO KEEP
THE SALIVARY GLANDS ENGAGED
THROUGHOUT
THE EATING EXPERIENCE.
SO WE WILL BEGIN
WITH THE DRESSING.
WHISK TOGETHER
1 TABLESPOON
OF WHITE WINE VINEGAR
WITH THE ZEST OF ONE LEMON--
THERE WE GO--
A TABLESPOON
OF FRESHLY SQUEEZED LEMON JUICE,
2 TEASPOONS, OR THEREABOUTS,
OF DIJON MUSTARD--
THERE WE GO--
A TEASPOON OF KOSHER SALT--
CLOSE ENOUGH--
AND A PINCH OR TWO
OF FRESHLY GROUND BLACK PEPPER.
THERE. NOW AS SOON
AS THAT IS UNIFORM,
WE'LL DRIZZLE IN
1/4 OF A CUP OF OLIVE OIL--
WHATEVER KIND OF OLIVE OIL
YOU LIKE TO USE.
THAT'S RIGHT,
THIS IS A STANDARD
VINAIGRETTE PROCEDURE,
BECAUSE IT'S
A STANDARD VINAIGRETTE,
JUST EXTRA TANGY.
NOW GETTING THIS
REALLY, REALLY WAFER THIN
IS GOING TO REQUIRE THE USE
OF ONE OF THESE,
OR SOMETHING LIKE IT--
A MANDOLINE OR A V-SLICER.
BUT IN ORDER TO GET IT
REALLY ON THERE,
WE WILL CUT THIS DOWN
INTO QUARTERS, OR THEREABOUTS.
WE WANT AS MUCH OF THE STEM
AS POSSIBLE.
STEM FIRST AND, OF COURSE,
AS ALWAYS,
WE WILL EMPLOY THE HAND GUARD.
NOW DON'T WORRY. THIS IS
GOING TO BE A LITTLE BIT MESSY,
BUT IT'S GONNA BE WORTH IT.
JUST GO SLOWLY.
SINCE SOME OF THE PIECES ARE
STILL KIND OF ON THE LONG SIDE,
GO AHEAD
AND JUST CHOP THROUGH THAT
THREE OR FOUR TIMES,
A COUPLE TIMES
IN EACH DIRECTION.
AND THEN MOVE THAT OFF
INTO YOUR BOWL
RIGHT ON TOP OF THE DRESSING.
TOSS AND REFRIGERATE
FOR AT LEAST ONE HOUR
BEFORE SERVING.
NOW THAT THIS HAS MARINATED,
WE CAN ADD A FEW
FINAL FLAVOR COMBINATIONS--
6 OUNCES OF EITHER CHERRY
OR GRAPE TOMATOES, SLICED,
3 OUNCES BY WEIGHT
OF TOASTED NUTS.
YOU COULD USE PECANS.
I PREFER HAZELNUTS.
AND 2 TABLESPOONS
OF BASIL CHIFFONADE--
THAT'S FRENCH
FOR "LITTLE RIBBONS," YOU KNOW.
IN THEY GO
AND TOSS TO COMBINE.
("Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy"
playing)
JUST AS I SUSPECTED,
NOBODY TOUCHED IT.
NOW JUST LET THIS SIT
FOR ABOUT 15 MINUTES
BEFORE SERVING,
AND THEN JUST WAIT
FOR A GRATEFUL WORLD.
(indistinct conversation)
AND SO BROCCOLI,
VINDICATED AT LAST,
IS RELEASED FROM THE VEGETAL
HALL OF HORRORS.
ALTHOUGH WE CAN NEVER ERASE
THOSE LOST YEARS OF LOATHING,
WE CAN HOPE FOR A NEW DAY
IN WHICH CHILDREN
AND PRESIDENTS ALIKE
RIGHTLY BEG FOR BROCCOLI.
ARE THERE STILL
PLENTY OF EDIBLE MONSTERS
LURKING OUT IN THE DARKNESS?
INDEED THERE ARE.
BUT THEY'LL HAVE TO WAIT
FOR THEIR OWN EPISODES
OF "GOOD EATS."
Closed Captions provided
by Scripps Networks, LLC.
Captioned by
Closed Captioning Services, Inc.