Gomer Pyle: USMC (1964–1969): Season 5, Episode 8 - A Star Is Not Born - full transcript

Starring... as Gomer Pyle.

Also starring... as
Sergeant Carter.

♪ ♪

She sells seashells
by the seashore.

She sells seashells
by the seashore.

Come in!

She sells seashells
by the seashore.

Hey, Sergeant. Pyle.

Are you about ready?

The studio car will be here
in a few minutes to pick us up.


What are you doing, Sergeant?

Loosening up.

Today's the day we
shoot the big scene,

so I'm loosening up.

Those are exercises actors
use when they loosen up.

Peter Piper picked a
peck of pickled peppers.

Gosh! That's good, Sergeant.

That's real good.

Nice and loud and clear,

just like a professional actor.

But don't you think
you better be practicing

the line you're going
to do in the picture?

Oh, I got that down perfect.

These difficult lines are
just to get me warmed up.

What is the line you're
going to do, Sergeant?

You want to hear
it? Listen to this.

Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw!

Course, that's just
the line. I don't know

what the director's
going to want me

to do while I'm saying it.

He might want me climbing
up a flagpole saying it.

Or he might want me
crawling on my belly.


I'm all prepared.
I got the line.

All is need is some stuff to do.

I'm sure glad I don't
have to do any lines.

I'd be too nervous.

I'm just happy that all I have
to do in the picture is sing.

To each his own.

Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw!

Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw!

What you doing now, Sergeant?

I'm trying to figure out
which is my best side.

When I say my line,

I want them to
shoot my best side.

Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw!

Yeah. I sure hope the
director shoots me full face.

That's my best side.

Here are the papers
you ordered, sir.

Oh, thanks. How much are they?

Dime apiece. That's 20 cents.

You got change for a quarter?

No, sir.

That's okay. Keep it.

Thank you, sir.

What kind of newspapers
are those, Sergeant?

They're so little.

Well, this is the Daily Variety

and this is The
Hollywood Reporter.

They tell you everything that's
going on in show business.

Well, ain't that interesting.

Look at that headline.

"B.O. Gross Tops at Marathon."

What's that mean?

What does it mean?

It means exactly what it says.

The top executive at Marathon
Studios is Mr. B.O. Gross.

Really? Well, further
on down here, it says,

"Box office gross
receipts sets a new high."

Yeah. Okay, B.O. Gross.

That's his nickname...
"Box Office" Gross.

I could've never
figured that out.

Hey, look, Sergeant,

here's something
about our picture.

Leathernecks of the
Air starts shooting today.

Let me see that.

Yeah. "Leathernecks of the Air.

"Produced by John Fenton,
directed by Norman Miles,

"starring Dick Linke
and Larry Fitzgerald,

"and filmed with the cooperation

of the United States
Marine Corps."

That's us, Pyle!

You and me and the
guys, we're in the papers.


Hello. Sergeant Carter here.

Okay, I'll be right down.

Yeah. Pyle is with me.

Come on. Car's out front.

Peter Piper picked a
peck of pickled peppers.

Peter Piper picked a
peck of pickled peppers.

All right, knock
it off, you people.

Try to act a little

Pyle? Gomer Pyle?

Ah. You're doing
the song, right?

Yes, sir.

Mr. Miles wants Rudy to
make you up personally,

so you go down to Makeup Room A.

That's right down there.

And the rest of you fellas

go to Makeup Room B,
which is right over there, okay?

Uh, fella?


I'm Sergeant Carter.

The one with the line.

Yeah, I know. You go to
Room B with the others.

Don't you think I
need special makeup?

Sergeant, if Mr. Miles had
wanted special makeup,

he would have ordered it.

Now, will you please hurry?

We're on a very tight schedule.

He's ready, Mr. Miles,

if you'd like to check him over.

Oh, yeah, get the rest of them

on the set, will you? Yes, sir.

Morning, Pyle. Morning.

Yeah, he looks
fine; just a little shiny.

Mop him down, huh?

I sure hope I don't
disappoint you, Mr. Miles.

Oh, I've heard you sing.

You're gonna be fine.

Join the rest of the
fellows, will you?

Okay, everybody, let
me give you a rundown

on what the action is.

Uh, when I start the...

No, you, Carter.

Yes, sir?

You never had a
moustache, did you?

No, sir.

Then what is that?

Well, I had the
makeup man put it on.

Yeah? Why?

Oh, I figured I
was the sergeant,

I should have something
to make me stand out.

Yeah, well, those
stripes will do that.

Yeah, yeah, I guess they will.

Now, why don't you go

have the makeup man take it off.

And hurry it up, will you?

Time costs money around here.



All right, let me give you
a rundown on the action.

You fellas are all here
in the Air Cadets Club,

and you're waiting for Henshaw.

Now, Henshaw, as
you know, is a fella

that you've hated all
through flight training

because he's been behaving
like a spoiled rich kid.

So, you've been giving
him the silent treatment,

you've made him
feel like an outsider.

But today, Henshaw
redeemed himself.

He pulled one of your buddies

out of a flaming airplane
and saved his life.

Now, he has just been
released from the hospital.

And so, you're all waiting here

to give him a surprise party.

Now, as soon as he
comes through the door,

when I say action, all you
balloon people up there

and the cork poppers
and the streamer throwers,

you all go into action.

And everybody give a good
cheer for Henshaw, okay?

Now, Sergeant,

when I throw you
the cue like this,

you say your line.

You look at
Henshaw, and you say,

"Okay, let's hear
it for Henshaw!"

Got it? Yes, sir.

Gomer, as soon as you hear that,

you start to sing,
and all the rest

of the people join
in with you. Yes, sir.

Gloria. Yeah?

When you hear
the sergeant's line,

you come popping out
of the cake, you got it?

Okay, Mr. Miles.

Right, now, fellas,

this is a complicated
production number,

so let's shoot the rehearsal.

We might get lucky, okay?

All right, let's make it.

That's places,
everybody... Up for picture.

Can I have a bell, Ronnie?

Roll 'em!

Special effects ready?

Ready. Speed.

Scene six, take one.

Now, remember, Sergeant,
you watch for my cue.

Right? Yes, sir.

And... action.

Cut, cut, cut, cut!

All right, clean it up.

Let's get ready
for the next take.

What's the matter, Sarge?

When I threw you the
cue, did you forget the line?

No, sir, I remembered
it, but, well,

with the camera rolling and
all them people watching,

I guess... I'm sorry,
sir, I'll get it this time.

Okay, just relax.

Happens to
everybody the first time.

Take it easy, take deep breaths.

Yes, sir.

You know, another
real good way, Sergeant,

is just kind of slump over

and let your whole body go limp

and wiggle your fingers.

I read in Movie Journal magazine

that that's what
Troy Donahue does

right before he does
a big dramatic scene.

You ready, Sergeant?

Uh, yes, sir, I'm fine,
Mr. Miles, I'm fine.

All right, good.

Just a minute... makeup,

come in and mop
him down, will you?

It's the lights.

They make me sweat.

You want to get my
palms while you're at it?

And now watch for
my cue, Sergeant.

And come right
in with your line.

Yes, sir.

And as soon as he
throws the line, Gloria,

you pop up out of the cake.


Okay, let's try it.

Quiet, please.

Roll 'em!

All right, here we go.

Special effects ready? Ready.

Scene six, take two.

All right, everybody stand by.

And... Okay, let's
here it for Henshaw!

Surprise! MILES: Cut.

Cut, cut.

I guess I was a...

little too fast that time, huh?

Yeah, you jumped the cue.

Don't be so eager.

Yeah, I was over anxious.

I know that. All right.

Okay, let's do it again.

Yeah, wait'll I
throw you the cue,

and then you come in
with the line. Yes, sir.

Makeup, you want
to give me a mop?

Don't worry, Sergeant,

you'll get it right next time.

Just don't be nervous.

Just block it out of your mind

that the whole scene
depends on your one line.

Just forget it's the most
important line in the show.

Pyle, will you knock it off?

Chuck, I think
this guy's a stiff.

He'll be all right, Mr. Miles.

Just give him a little time.

After all, he's no pro.

I know that, but what is he?

All right, let's go.

Okay, quiet, please.

Roll 'em!

All right, Sergeant,
now, is everything clear?

Yes, sir.

Special effects ready? Ready.

Scene six, take three.

Now, remember, Sergeant,
I'll give you the cue.

Yes, sir.


Okay, let's hear
it for Peter Piper!

Peter Henshaw!


Surpri... Did you
say the line wrong?

Cut, cut, cut.

Oh, man, Chuck, it's
gonna be one of those days.

Just one of those days.

Why don't we
replace him, Mr. Miles?

We can't... the producer
picked him for the line

when he made the
deal with the Marines.

We're stuck with him.

Okay, let's try it again.

Quiet, please.

Scene six, take 14.

Now, try to remember, Sergeant.

Your line is, "Okay,
let's hear it for Henshaw!"


No, no, not when I
say it, when he says it!

How do you expect
me to hear who says it?

It's dark in there!

It'll be a lot brighter at
the unemployment office!

Harry, put her back
in the cake, will ya?

Still rolling, Mr. Miles.

Well, cut it, cut it!

It's, uh, too bad all that
happened, Mr. Miles.

I was ready that time.

Scene six, take 15.

All right, now, Sergeant,

you come in on
cue, and the line is...

You know what the line is.

Cover her up, let's go.

Special effects ready?


All right, here we go.


You know what the line is!

Scene six, take 32.

Special effects ready?

No, sir. What?

We're out of champagne.

We used more balloons
than a New Year's Eve party.

Okay, that's it for today.

Make it a wrap.

Okay, fellas, that's a wrap.

We'll pick it up
tomorrow, same scene.

You'll get your calls.

Gee, uh, it didn't seem
to go too good today.

No... no, it didn't.

Well, don't worry
about it, Sergeant.

In movies, they never do expect

to get it right the first day.

I read in Photo Gossip magazine

that when they were
shooting Gone With the Wind,

they had to burn
Atlanta eight times

before they got it right.

Yeah, I guess it's a lot
harder than people think.

It's sure tough to
know how you're doing

in front of the camera.

And things can go
wrong behind the camera.

Why, I thought you did that line

real good that one time.

Something must have
got fouled up on their end.

Yeah, I did feel good
the one time I did say,

"Okay, let's hear
it for Henshaw."

Well, look how
good you did it then.

Why, if they hadn't have run out

of champagne and
stuff, why, they could've

had their scene
right then and there.

That's right.

I guess it's just a
tough break, huh?

Ah, sure.

Good night, Mr. Miles.

Good night, Mr. Miles.

We'll get them in
the morning, huh?

Look, I don't care who
picked him for the part,

I want a new man tomorrow.

When you give out
the calls tomorrow,

don't call Sergeant Carter.


Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw!

Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw.

Okay, let's hear
it... for Henshaw.

Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw.

Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw.

Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw.

Okay, let's hear it...

let's hear it for Henshaw.

Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw.

Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw.

Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw.

Okay, let's hear
it for Mr. Miles!


Makeup! Makeup!

Oh, boy.

Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw.

Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw.

Come in.

Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw.

Okay, let's hear it for
Henshaw. Hey, Sergeant.

Pyle. Okay, let's
hear it for Henshaw.

Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw.
You got that line down real good now.

Are you ready to go? Okay,
let's hear it for Henshaw.

No... Okay, let's
hear it for Henshaw.

Why not? What
are we waiting for?

I didn't get my call yet.

Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw.

Well, that's strange...
We all got our calls.

We're supposed to
be at the studio at 9:00.

Really? I wonder
why they didn't call me.

Maybe there's something
wrong with my phone.

Hello? Hello? Hello?

Oh, uh, hello, Operator.

I was just checking the phone.

It works, huh?

Uh, say, were there any
calls for me, Sergeant Carter?

I'm here making
the Marine movie.

Oh... well, thanks.

There were no calls.

I wonder what's going on.

Wait a minute, I
know what it is!

What, Pyle, what?

Well, you're the leading
character in the scene.

You're the one that's got
the line, ain't that right?

Yeah. Well, they probably
want to get everything set up,

and then they'll call you.

You know, let you
relax a little longer.

I don't know, Pyle,
are you sure that's it?

Well, of course... it
couldn't be anything else.

They do that with
important actors all the time.

Maybe you're right.

I don't go for that
privileged-character treatment,

but I guess you can't
fight the system, huh?

And I think it's very
thoughtful of that director.

Yeah. He'll probably send
a car for me in an hour or so.

Oh, sure he will.

Well, I better be
getting on downstairs.

You just relax, you hear?


Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw.

Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw.

Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw.

Okay, fellas, let's
move it along.

We want to get started.

Let's see if we can get
the scene in one take today.

Excuse me.

Are you gonna shoot the
scene right now? Right.

Excuse me, Mr. Miles.

Hmm? Oh, Pyle, good...
I wanted to talk to you.

The assistant director said

you're fixing to
shoot that scene now.

Yeah. But Sergeant Carter

ain't here yet...
He's still at the hotel

waiting on his call.

Yes, I know.

Okay, same scene
as yesterday, fellas.

Let's get started. Now, Pyle...

Well, how can we do the
scene without Sergeant Carter?

He's the one that's got the line,
"Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw."

No, he was the one...
now you say it. Sir?

You say the line.

"Okay, let's hear it for
Henshaw"? Hey, good, just like that.

You take the line. Okay,
Chuck, let's get started.

Yes, sir. Places, everybody!

Well, what do you mean,
Mr. Miles, that's my line?

That's Sergeant Carter's line.

No, it was his line.

You ready, Chuck? Yes, sir.

You mean you're
not gonna use him?

You ain't even gonna
call him? That's right.

But it means so much to him,

and, gosh, he's
practiced so hard.

Last night, when we
went out to dinner,

he was saying the
line, and this morning

I seen him, and he
was saying it, and...

Probably still
hasn't got it right.

But he does.

Pyle, we took 32 takes
on that line yesterday.

We're way behind schedule...

I just can't waste
any more time.

But he's told everybody
back at the base

he's gonna be in
this picture, and, well,

they're expecting
to see him in it, and...

Well, he'll feel so awful, he won't
even be able to look 'em in the eye.

Look, Pyle, the last thing I
want to do is to hurt anybody,

but I got a picture to make, and I
got to do it the best way I know how.

So, come on, get on the
set and let's get started, huh?

Well, golly, Mr. Miles...
Don't worry about a thing,

just wait for me to
give you this cue.

What gives, Gome?

Where's Sergeant Carter?

They're not gonna
use him in the scene.

They told me to take the line.

No kidding.

It just ain't right.

Quiet, please.

Roll 'em.

Special effects ready?


Scene six, take 33.

Okay, let's get it the
first time this time, fellas.


Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw.


♪ For he's a jolly good fellow ♪

♪ For he's a jolly good fellow ♪

♪ For he's a jolly good fellow ♪

♪ Which nobody can deny ♪

♪ Let all the good fellows
come join in the song ♪

♪ Vive la compagnie... ♪

Now, cut it. Cut it.

Okay, everybody
back for a fresh start.

Save the lights.

The line wasn't
too good, Mr. Miles.

Think we ought to
replace him with an actor?

We can replace him
with an actor for the line,

but how do I
replace the singing?

Hey, Pyle, come here.

Hey, what's the problem, fella?

I mean, Henshaw's back,

you're supposed to be
full of life, full of energy.

Yes, sir.

I heard you rehearse this song.

You're just great in it.

Let's get the same spirit, huh?

I'll try, Mr. Miles.

Good fella.

Okay, once again
from the top, fellas.

Hit the lights.

Okay, quiet please.

Roll 'em!

Scene six, take 34.

Okay, this is gonna
be the one, fellas.

All right, and action!

Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw.


♪ For he's a jolly good fellow ♪

♪ For he's a jolly good fellow ♪

♪ For he's a jolly good fellow ♪

♪ Which nobody can deny ♪

♪ Let all the good fellows
come join in the song ♪

- ♪ Vive la compagnie...
- Cut it.

Take five, everybody.

What do you think's
wrong, Mr. Miles?

I think he misses his sergeant.

What do we do, bring him back?

And go for 32 more takes?

If we're lucky.

No, I think there's another way.

Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw.

Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw.

Okay, let's... Hello!

Hello, Mr. Miles.

I thought you'd never call.


Well, sure, I can be down

in front of the hotel
in five minutes.

Thank you, Mr. Henshaw!

Uh, Miles!

Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw.

Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw.

Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw.

Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw.

Hello, Pyle.

Hey, Sergeant. You were right.

They didn't call me
till the last minute

so I could have
more time to relax.

Boy, that was darn
decent of that director.

You know, when
this movie's over,

I think I'll buy him something.

That sure would
be nice, Sergeant.

Yeah. I better get to makeup.

Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw.

Okay, let's... Oh, Sergeant.

Glad to see you.
Hello, Mr. Miles.

I was just on my way to makeup.

I-I got the line down perfect.

You don't have to
worry. Oh, oh, yeah.

Well, I've been thinking
about that, Sergeant,

and I got the feeling
that we have not been

utilizing your
talents to the fullest.

You haven't? No.

I got the feeling that we're
wasting you in that small part.

You should have
something much bigger.


Did you hear that,
Sergeant? A bigger part!

Uh, what kind of
part is that, Mr. Miles?

Well, what I got in mind
is the pivotal character.

You see, the whole
picture revolves around you.

It does? Mm-hmm.

Why don't you come
to makeup with me,

I'll fill you in on the way.

Golly, it's just like them
stories you read about.

A star is born.

Let's have it quiet, please.

Roll 'em.

Scene six, take 35.


Okay, let's hear it for Henshaw!


And let's drink a toast

to the man who Henshaw saved!

♪ For he's a jolly good fellow ♪

♪ For he's a jolly good fellow ♪

♪ For he's a jolly good fellow ♪

♪ Which nobody can deny ♪

♪ A friend on the left
and a friend on the right ♪

♪ Vive la compagnie ♪

♪ In love and good
fellowship let us unite ♪

♪ Vive la compagnie ♪

♪ Vive la, vive
la, vive l'amour ♪

♪ Vive la, vive
la, vive l'amour ♪

♪ Vive l'amour, vive l'amour ♪

♪ Vive la compagnie ♪

♪ Vive la compagnie. ♪

Wasn't it nice of Mr. Miles
to let us see the films

of that scene we did yesterday?

Yeah, but I sure
didn't have much to do.

And you could
hardly recognize me

with all them
bandages on my face.

But you did a real
good job, Sergeant.

Even though you
didn't say nothing,

it was all there in the
expression on your face.

Your little eyes just
squinched up with pain.

That's what I call real acting.

Who are you kidding, Pyle?

I was like a fish out of water.

Show business
definitely ain't for me.

Well, none of us
are real performers.

We was just doing it
'cause they asked us to.

Yeah, and I don't mind telling
you I'm sure glad it's all over.

Can we have your
autographs? Are you actors?

No, son, we ain't.

Don't let him fool you none.

He's a real fine actor.

Matter of fact, he just finished

a big part in
Leathernecks of the Air.

Really? What's his name?

Vince Carter.

You remember that name,

because you're gonna
be hearing all about him.

Really? Can I have your
autograph, Mr. Carter?

Sure, kid.

But that's Sergeant Carter.

Sergeant Vincent Carter,
United States Marine Corps.