Glee (2009–2015): Season 4, Episode 8 - Thanksgiving - full transcript

Some McKinley alumni give New Directions advice about Sectionals. Elsewhere, Rachel and Kurt have a nontraditional Thanksgiving dinner.

(footsteps echoing)

♪ I'm sitting in a railway station ♪

♪ Got a ticket for my destination ♪

♪ Oh... oh...

♪ On a tour of one-night stands ♪

♪ My suitcase and guitar in hand ♪

BOTH: ♪ And every stop
is neatly planned ♪

♪ For a poet and a one-man band ♪

♪ This wave...

♪ Wave...

♪ Is stringing us along

♪ Along

♪ Just know you're not alone

♪ 'Cause I'm gonna make
this place your home ♪

♪ Every day's an endless stream ♪

♪ Of cigarettes and magazines

♪ Oh, oh-oh

♪ And each town
looks the same to me ♪

♪ The movies and the factories

♪ And every stranger's face I see ♪

♪ Reminds me that I long to be

♪ The trouble, it
might drag you down ♪

♪ If you get lost, you
can always be found ♪

♪ Just know you're not alone

♪ Know you're not alone

♪ 'Cause I'm gonna make
this place your home ♪


♪ Oh, oh,

♪ Know you're not alone

♪ Where my music's playing

♪ Oh, oh-oh,
oh-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh ♪

♪ I'm gonna make, I'm gonna make ♪

♪ Make this place our home

♪ Ah... ah-ah,

♪ Ah, ah, ah, ah...

♪ Know you're not alone

♪ Ah... ah-ah,
ah-ah-ah-ah, ah-ah. ♪

Home for the holidays...

just like we promised.

Guys, I-I...

Dude, if you start crying,
I'm gonna kick your ass.

(Quinn chuckles)

Group hug!

(all chuckle)


(bell ringing)

MARLEY: When I was seven
years old, I had a dream.

It's the first one I actually remember.

I was alone... on a stage

wearing a beautiful dress.

I couldn't see the audience,

but I could feel the full house.

They had all come for one
reason: to hear me sing.

And now, thanks to Glee Club,
with sectionals this week,

that dream is about to come true.

Well, except the part
where Skeet Ulrich gave me

a bouquet of kittens at the end.

My dreams are weird.

Mom's doing great with her diet.

She's lost 12 pounds!

I haven't lost quite as much,

but I'm pretty sure I
can see a difference.

I'm not letting up until
after sectionals, though.

I've got to look my best up there.

I just want to be great for all of them.

I can feel how much
they're depending on me.

I can't let them down.

Especially them.

The pressure is on, Marley Rose,

and it's like Mom always says...

Don't blow it.

PUCK: So I said, "You girls
are gonna need another cup."


Yeah, but, guys, I'd
like to propose a toast:

To almost all of us keeping our promise

to come home for Thanksgiving.

Cheers! Cheers!

Here's to us.

Has anybody heard from Rachel or Kurt?

No. I know Blaine's been

texting him, but Kurt won't text back.

Well, Rachel e-mailed me.
She said she's not really sure

what she's doing for the holidays yet.

I'm sorry about what went
down with the two of you.

No, it's cool. It's for the best.

Well, I think that it's sweet

that you and Rachel
keep in touch, Quinn.

Well, she basically
e-mails me every other week

to remind me that I still haven't used

the train ticket that she gave me.

I'm just, I'm trying
to keep straight A's.

And I just got tapped to be in

the only female secret society at Yale.

Former members: Hillary
Clinton, Jennifer Beals.

You go, girl. (all chuckle)

Well, I, for one, would love

to talk about everybody that is here.

I have a favor to ask.

(bell ringing)

All right, do you realize,
standing before you are legends?

(cheers and applause)

Any single one of these guys could be.

President of the United States one day.

I don't know about
that. And lucky for us,

they've agreed to help us...

Hang with the new
chumps and see if some of

our sheer awesomeness
doesn't rub off on you.

It will.

When you hear your name, pair up.

Puck, you're with your brother.

Mike, you're with Ryder.

Marley, you're with Santana.

Kitty, you're with Quinn.

Oh! Wade, Mercedes.

Sashay. Enchanté.

I knew it. Mercedes was cloned.

Now, your mentors are here to
help you with whatever you need:

Singing, dancing...

Birth control.

You're so funny and self-deprecating!

We're so much alike!


The worst mistake that we can make

is to underestimate our competition.

The Warblers are ruthless this year.

Don't forget about the
Rosedale Mennonites.

Any show choir that can
raise a barn in five minutes

deserves mad respect.

Marley and Blaine will handle our duet,

and for the showstopper
we're doing "Gangnam Style."

Okay, lumps, let me just say out loud

what everyone here is thinking:

You finally got an okay
haircut, you're not doing

that annoying half smirk
as much as you used to,

but you're still a
idiot. No one in this room

can tackle a massive dance
number except for Brit.

That includes your little "Hand-Jive"

that, to me, looked more like a hand...

Is there any way Mr. Shue
can come back for this?

Listen to me, we have never
lost sectionals before,

and there's no way we're
gonna do it under my watch.

We can and we will succeed!

We need an ambitious number
with a strong dance element.

That's the Warbler's calling
card, and we need to blow them

out of the water. And Mike
said he could easily show

one of our guys how to do
the dance number. I did?

Crap. I, uh, I kind of
forgot to ask you about that.

But one of our guys is gonna have

to take the lead with
Brit. So who's it gonna be?

Hello? White Chocolate.


MERCEDES: Oh, no, no, no. Um...

(bell ringing)

Hey, I can't believe
that we have to dance

for this guy who's getting trained

at the Joffrey Ballet School.

He's gonna think I'm special needs.

Listen, man, I need to talk

to you about something else.

Last Friday...

I kind of went out with Marley.

Kind of?

I mean, we didn't actually go anywhere.

We just kind of hung
out and played SongPop

and Bad Piggies all night.

So this is like a thing?

Not if it's gonna make
us mortal enemies again.

I'll end it if you want
me to, but for the record,

I wasn't just gonna
hump her and dump her.

Marley's different, she's special.

No, don't break it off because of me.


Yeah, but you better not snake

the dance lead from me, all right?

You don't get to have
everything at this school.

That's all yours, dude.

I don't have any end zone moves anyway.

RACHEL: So I found out that I
didn't get cast in Glass Menagerie,

KURT: Oh! But the NYADA
Showcase is this week,

so I'm gonna spend the
whole, long holiday weekend

just really prepping for it to
make sure that I get it. Good.

Did you put in your application?

I'm really feeling good
about us staying home

for the weekend, don't you?

Yeah, yeah. Yeah-yeah-

We don't have to go home
just because there's a show

or because it's a long weekend, right?

Right, no. I mean,

even though it's Thanksgiving,

and sectionals, and all
our friends are there,

and I miss my dad.

I miss my dads, too, but
I just feel like every time

we go home, it just makes me feel sad

and like we're not like
moving forward, you know?

And even though we don't
have our boyfriends,

we still have our
dreams and our ambition.

And each other.

Yes. You are the only
significant other I need

in my life. Oh...

I have to just, you
know, forget about Finn

and forget about Brody.

Forget about Blaine.

Yeah, forget any guy who's broke
an girl or guy's heart, okay?

We are on the verge of becoming

the best versions of
ourselves. Can't you feel it?

For the first time, probably because

it's easier just to
drink your Kool-Aid,

than go against you.
I know what you mean.

Look. Look at our life.

Look at this city! Yeah.

I know that it can be a little
sad and lonely sometimes,

but I promise you,

we are gonna have the
best Thanksgiving ever.

Pinkie promise?

Pinky promise.

(synthesizer pop plays)

Okay, fellas,

Korean boy bands have been
tearing up the music scene,

and there's a lot we
can learn from them.

Follow my lead.

♪ Fantastic, baby, dance

♪ I wanna dance,
dance, dance, dance ♪

Stretch it out.

♪ Fantastic, baby, dance

Sam, toes, bro! Dude, wear some shoes!

Jake, come on. Let's pick it up, man.

Come on, you guys gotta feel it.

Here we go. Hands, hip, quick feet.

Easy, Sam. You look like
you're trying to mount someone.

This was what I call "The Big Tipper."

Big bills always came flying.

Ryder, looking good, man.

Those moves are legit, son.

Seriously, Jake?

Even I can do better. Come on.

Dude, lay off, okay?
This isn't my style.

Show some more. Here we go.


Oh, this battle is over.

Looks like we got our new
Gangnam front man right here.

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah,
gotcha, gotcha, gotcha ♪

♪ Wow, fantastic, baby.

Along with being
beautiful, the three of us

are National Showchoir
Championship goddesses.

We are winners.

Which is why Finn has asked
us to come and shower you

with the inspiration that
is the Unholy Trinity.

Santana, Brittany and I
knew each other so well

that I could tell by
the slightest quiver

in Santana's upper lip
which way we were gonna move.

Whether our hips are
gonna shake or shimmy.

No. You girls have to
be tight up there, okay?

The judges love the feminine quality,

and the Warblers just don't have it.

It's about being individuals.

You know, we're all different.

But it's also about synchronicity.

Can you give us an example?

It's been a few months,

but I'm the three of us could

put together something on the fly.

(girls squeal)


(The Supremes' "Come
See About Me" begins)

♪ I've been cryin'

♪ Ooh, ooh ♪

♪ 'Cause I'm lonely

♪ For you ♪

♪ Smiles have all turned

♪ To tears ♪

♪ The tears won't wash away

♪ The fears

♪ That you're never,
ever gonna return ♪

♪ To ease the fire
that within me burns ♪

♪ It keeps me

♪ Cryin', baby, for you

♪ Keeps me sighin', baby, for you ♪

♪ So won't you hurry

♪ Come on, boy, see about me

♪ Come see about me ♪

♪ See about your baby

♪ Come see about me ♪

♪ I've given up my friends just ♪

♪ For you ♪

♪ My friends have gone and you

♪ Have, too ♪

♪ No peace shall I find

♪ Until you come back

♪ And be mine

♪ No matter what you do or say

♪ I'm gonna love you anyway

♪ Keep on cryin', baby, for you ♪

♪ I'm gonna keep
sighin', baby, for you ♪

♪ So come on, hurry

♪ Come on and see about me

♪ Come see about me ♪

♪ See about your baby

♪ Come see about me ♪

♪ You know I'm so lonely

♪ Come see about me ♪

♪ I love you only ♪
Come see about me ♪

♪ See about me

♪ Come see about me ♪

♪ See about your baby

♪ Come see about me ♪

♪ You know I'm so lonely

♪ Come see about me ♪

♪ I love you only ♪
Come see about me ♪

♪ Come see about me

♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh.

(music ends)

(cheering, excited chatter)

Hey, are you... are you feeling okay?

You look like you're gonna hurl.

Um, I think I'm just really tired

from all the rehearsing.

(bell ringing)

KITTY: Now that we're alone,
can I tell you a secret?

Of course.

If Finn hadn't paired us together,

I would've thrown such a hissy.

Why is that?

Because you're Quinn
Fabray, and I idolize you.

You're Cheerios royalty.

Can I show you something? Sure.

Every day, I ask myself,

"What would Quinn Fabray do?"

It's really nice to know
that people still remember me.

Remember you?

Oh, no, we aspire to
be you, me especially.

What's with Marley?

She seemed a little out
of it during rehearsal.

Oh, that one?

She's sweet as pie,

and I've tried to be
a good friend to her,

but ever since she started
dating Jake Puckerman,

I fear she's on the wrong path.

Word is he's pressuring
her to swipe her V-card.

If that were to happen,

well, no one knows the
dangers of a good girl

mixing with a Puckerman better than you.

I can't believe that you're
not dancing with Brittany.

I've seen you.

You're incredible.

You told me that you love it.

You take lessons.

It's kind of an honor
amongst bro thing with Ryder.

Look, he's being really
cool about you and me,

and he wants the solo,

so I'm just trying to do him a solid.

Even if that means we lose sectionals?


Ryder's gonna be great.

I promise.

I will make sure he's great.

Now can I walk you to lunch please?

You've been skipping out on me all week.

Can't. I have to rehearse.

Because I'm not gonna be the one

who lets the team down.

(bell ringing)

Uh, guys, listen up.

Ms. July said that she
does not want to teach today

because she can't stand
to be in the same room

as your mediocrity again.

If you ask me, she just
sounds super hung over.

Either way, I will be
teaching Dance 101 today.

Is there a problem?

Well, you know, everyone
here pays like, $30,000 a year

to be taught by a
professional and not a T.A.

I'm sorry, are you angry
at me about something?

You mean, besides the fact
that you slept with Cassie?

And why do you care who I sleep with?

Do I really need to answer that?

Hey, I'm the one who came on to you,

remember? You broke off our date

to see another guy. Yeah,
well, that's over now.

And what, so I'm supposed
to have retroactively known

that that was gonna happen
and not slept with Cassie?

All right, guys,

let's, uh, let's pair up and
start with a basic fox-trot.

(music begins)

We're not in high school anymore, okay?

We're adults

making adult choices.

You made yourself unavailable.

Don't be that crazy girl

who expects people to read her mind.

Well, I'm sorry, but you don't
have to be a mind reader to know

that she is my mortal enemy.

Did it at least suck? Are you kidding?

It was amazing. Have you seen her ass?

Look, but I know that we're friends

and I don't want to hurt you, so...

it won't happen again, okay?


What are you doing for Thanksgiving?

Going back to Ohio?

No, Kurt and I are doing

our little private
orphan Thanksgiving here.

Wow, that sounds awful and depressing,

especially since I've
tasted your cooking.

(chuckles) All right, guys, come on.

Let's take it from the top.

And this time, can we actually try?

So I can't afford to go home this year.

How about I come over
and cook for you guys?

Yeah, that would be great.

Do you mind if I bring
Cassie? Oh, shut up.

Just dance with me. Okay.

PUCK: That's a real solid
you're doing for that Ryder dude.

"Bros before hos" was always
my mantra in high school.

Well, it was after I knocked
up my best friend's girlfriend.

Oh, speak of the devil I knocked up.

Back off of Marley.

Excuse me?

I got this, little bro.

See that furrowed brow, lips pursed,

hand on her hip, this is what I like

to call "Loopy Quinn."

It's an irrational state

that she apparently only
reserves for Puckermans.

He's messing with her head.

He's pressuring her to have sex th him.

Who told you that? I don't
need somebody to tell me

that the biggest womanizer in school

is trying to take
advantage of the naive girl

who just wants to fit in and be loved,

especially if the womanizer's
last name is Puckerman.

You don't know me. I'm
a lot of thing he's not,

and I would never do that to Marley.

I don't believe you.

Quinn, I think you're being
a little out of line here.

The only way you're gonna win sectionals

is if Marley's at her best.

And if you keep distracting her,

she's not going to be.

Hey. Oh!

Oh, Isabelle, I am so sorry.

I thought I was the last one here.

Its okay. Actually, I'm almost done.

I'm just, um, proofing
the filmmaker roundtable.

Oh, I love that article.

Oh, good. I love Christmas movies.

Be honest, which one

are you looking forward to the most,

Les Miz or The Hobbit?

Oh, wow.

I love Peter Jackson,

but I'm obsessed with
the French Revolution,

so, uh, I suppose it would have

to be... a double
feature. A double feature?


So, uh, do you have any
fantabulous Thanksgiving plans?

For the last five years, I
always went to Gore Vidal's

for dinner and Pictionary.

But you know, Gore
passed away this year,

so I don't know.

I'll probably just get some turkey pizza

from Two Boots and, uh,

recreate my first Thanksgiving

in New York.

Well, if you're interested,

my roommate and I are hosting
a bit of an orphan's dinner

out in Bushwick.

Bushwick? Ooh.

A rustic Thanksgiving.


Can I bring some friends? Of course.

We'll have as many orphans

as Mr. Bumble's workhouse, right?

Gruel for everyone.

You seem in a better mood.

You and your ex

have a rapprochement?

Au contraire.

No, I'm closing the book

to that sad saga. I'm just...

I'm done. I'm done thinking about it.

I'm done thinking if we're
gonna get back together,

wondering if we should
get back together.

No, it's over.

I sent him a text.

Said, "Please, stop calling
me to say you're sorry."

What's done is done."

You know. Well, listen,

nothing is better than being
single in New York City,

but you know, if he's
been reaching out to you...

Assuage his guilt?

No, sorry, cheater.

This petal needs to move on.

In my experience,

it's always easier for me to move on

if I've either had my apology accepted,

or in your case, accepted an apology.

You know,

sometimes it's the not
forgiving that holds us back.


(bell rings)

QUINN: Try to make eye contact

with the judges, and don't be afraid

to give them a flirty little smile

or maybe even a wink.

You're really doing them a favor.

You're reminding them of their youth

and what might have been.

I'm gonna write that down.

You're the best mentor ever.

Seriously, the best.


That bitch is pure evil.

I think she's sweet. Really?

Well, then why is she
giving my girl laxatives?

Why are you going through my bag?

It's all part of being a mentor.

What is this, huh?

And don't tell me

it's 'cause the cafeteria
food binds you up.

Those are like, from months ago.

I forgot they were even in there.

Your pretty little
liar gave them to her.

I can sense it thanks to my
psychic Mexican third eye.

See, this is what my psych
professor calls projecting.

You're projecting Kitty onto me.

Santana, we've graduated.
It's really time

to get over this. Get over what?

You being jealous of me.

And why would I be jealous of you?

And please don't tell me

its because you're in some
lame secret Nazi sorority.

Look, Homecoming weekend,

I went to Jodie Foster's clambake,

and that professor

that I was talking about,

well, he's 35,

smokes a pipe.

Well, he's divorcing his wife

who hasn't touched him for three years.

I'm dating him.

Wow, Twitter update!

Quinn is

all excited about another
guy defining her life.

And what are you excited about?

Shaking pom-poms in Kentucky?

I mean, you want everybody to
think that you're such a badass,

but really you're just
a scared little girl

with low self-esteem

who's too frightened
to chase her dreams.

Did Professor Patches teach you that one

in between quickies on his office couch?

Does he get so turned on

by teen moms who barely visit their kid?


What are you guys doing?


Quinn always was a genius slapper.

(bell rings)

(Psy's "Gangnam Style"
plays over headphones)

(muttering lyrics)

Are you dancing

or impersonating a horny epileptic?

Dude, I can't concentrate on the moves

until I memorize the words.



Najeneun ttasaroun...

I mean, seriously?

Dude, it's Korean.

Just sing gibberish. Who cares?

And if you're concentrating

on the dance moves,
you're doing it wrong.

(sighs) Well, that's how
I work through everything.

I learn the basics, practice
them over and over again,

and eventually I get it.

So, did you do an apple pie

500 times before you had sex?


It's exactly what I
did, but I wore a condom

so I didn't make any apple fritters.

(laughs) Look.

Some things you can't overthink, okay?

You just got to let it come natural.

"Gangnam Style" isn't about technique.

It's about just letting yourself go.

Okay? (Psy's "Gangnam Style" plays)

♪ Hey, sexy lady Sexy lady...

♪ Wup, wup, wup, wup

♪ Wuppa Gangnam Style Whoa.

I thought you said you
didn't have any moves.

(music stops) You asked
me not to take everything

from you and I respect that.

Plus, it's kind of embarrassing

that I'm trained in ballet.


Like, seriously?

Like tutu and everything?

It doesn't leave this room.

Dude, you're obviously better than me.

If we want to win, you should do it.

How about

I just help you get better?


But if at any point you want to bail,

or get food, or go get me food...

Let's start by watching
this video one more time.

Maybe we'll be viewer 500 million.

(music plays)

There he goes.

A bag?

Yeah, I'm telling you, you put
it in the bag and it self-bastes.

Tommy the turkey

is not gonna go dry.

Ina Garten would never
cook a turkey in a bag.

Well, when Ina comes to
cook you Thanksgiving dinner,

she can do as she pleases.

But our bird

is getting bagged. Mmm.

Guys, this is so great.

Yeah, it's like our own Big Chill.

Yeah, but no one breaks
out into song. What?

Now, Rachel, get over here

and help me butter up Tommy.

Okay, well, I'm a vegetarian

so I can't eat it but
I guess I can touch it.

Yeah. Okay, Mr. Tur... I'm very sorry.

Like that?

You got to get it in there.

Really show him that you love him.

You know? Just like that.

Is that good? Yeah, like that.

When you two are done using that turkey

as a courtship device,
would you put it in the oven?

'Cause it's almost 5:00.

Oh, my God, it's almost
time for sectionals to start.

Why are they having it
on Thanksgiving anyway?

I'm sure they figured with everyone

home for the holiday, they
would sell more tickets.

Most high schools have
football games for Thanksgiving.

I remember my first sectionals.

I was so nervous.

I gave myself this
pep talk in the mirror,

and I just began my soulful
monologue by saying...

MARLEY: You are ready for this.

You look really good,
your voice is strong.

It's time to make a little
girl's dream come true.

I'm so hungry... but at least

my dress fits.

Wade... I mean, Unique, you're back!

Yes, in all her glory.

And as you can see, Miss Marley,
she is ready for her close-up.

I thought your parents
didn't want you wearing...

They don't.

They're trying to protect me.

But what they need to understand

is if I'm not being
true to myself at least

when I'm performing, then there won't be

anything left inside me to protect.

So they can keep talking
about sending me to a camp

for little boys who
like to wear dresses,

but I will not and I cannot
be ashamed of who I am

or how I look.

You look beautiful.

I think it's inspiring

how brave and proud you are.

I wish I was more like that.


Hustle up, you two.

You're gonna miss show circle.

And welcome back, girl.

What's show circle? Come on.

It's a tradition before
every competition.

It's something Mr. Shue made up.

And today I want to add to it.

Joe, how about you lead us in prayer?

PUCK: Whoa, dude, Old Testament.

There's Hebrews here. Yeah, okay.

This is one of my favorite
Bible verses from Isaiah.

Considering that the
Warblers are so good,

and that it's the first
competition for a lot of you,

I think it's appropriate.

"So do not fear because I am with you.

"Do not be dismayed.

"I will strengthen you,

I will uphold you with
my righteous hand."

And our righteous dance
moves, amen. All right!

(indistinct chatter, applause)

Ugh! Man, I-I remember
our first sectionals

like it was yesterday.

We came together as a
team because we had to.

Because no one outside our circle

knew how much we'd been through,

and how much it meant to us to win it.

This is our house.

Look into the faces of these graduates.

They've been to the mountaintop.

This is just the first step in
your climb to meet them there.

On three?

ALL: One, two, three!

A... mazing!

MAN (over P.A.): A reminder that

the American Legion Turkey
Shoot begins at 6:00 p.m.

So, please, drive carefully.

Now, put your hands together

for our distinguished panel of judges!

(applause and cheering)

Lima News Obituary Editor, Stan Cook!

(band plays flourish,
applause and cheering)

Chief Historian of the
Lima Locomotive Museum,

Harrison Paolucci!

(band plays flourish)

And the 2012.

Defiance County Catfish
Queen, Allison Metcalf!


(cheering, whistling)

(whispering): Break a leg.

I'm Hunter Clarington, and we're
the Dalton Academy Warblers.

Hope you enjoy the show.

♪ Dah-dah, dah-dah,
dah-dah, dah-dah ♪

♪ Dah-dah, dah-dah, dah-dah,
dah-dah ♪ (whistling tune)

♪ Dah-dah, dah-dah,
dah-dah, dah-dah... ♪

♪ Can you blow my whistle,
baby, whistle, baby? ♪

♪ Let me know

♪ Girl, I'm gonna
show you how to do it ♪

♪ And we start real slow

♪ You just put your lips together ♪

♪ And you come real close

♪ Can you blow my whistle,
baby, whistle, baby? ♪

♪ Dah-dah, dah-dah

♪ Here we go

♪ Oh, oh ♪ Ching, chinga-ching,
ching-ching, ching-ching ♪

♪ Ching, chinga-ching, chinga,
ching-ching ♪
♪ Oh, oh

♪ Look ♪

♪ I'm betting you like people
♪ Ching, chinga-ching ♪

♪ And I'm betting
you love freak mode ♪

♪ And I'm betting you like
girls that give love to girls ♪

♪ And stroke your little ego

♪ I bet you I'm guilty, Your Honor ♪

♪ That's just how we live
in my genre ♪
♪ Hey! ♪

♪ Bet your lips spin
back around corner ♪

♪ Slow it down, baby,
take a little longer ♪

♪ Can you blow my whistle,
baby, whistle, baby? ♪
♪ Yeah

♪ Let me know

♪ Girl, I'm gonna
show you how to do it ♪

♪ And we start real slow

♪ You just put your lips together ♪

♪ And you come real close

♪ Can you blow my whistle,
baby, whistle, baby? ♪

♪ The sun, the sun, the sun ♪

(cheering) ♪ Here we go

(whistling) ♪ Hey! Hey! ♪

♪ Whistle, baby

♪ Whistle baby

♪ Whistle, baby! ♪ (whistling)

♪ Hey! ♪
♪ Whistle,
baby, whistle, baby

♪ It's like everywhere I go
my whistle ready to blow ♪

♪ Shorty don't leave a note,
she can get any by the low ♪

♪ Told me she's not a pro,
it's okay, it's under control ♪

♪ Show me soprano, 'cause
girl, you can handle ♪

♪ So amusing ♪ Amusing ♪

♪ Now you can make a whistle
with the music ♪
♪ Music ♪

♪ Hope you ain't got no issue,
you can do it ♪
♪ Do it ♪

♪ Give me the perfect pitch, ya
never lose it ♪
♪ Lose it ♪

♪ Can you blow my whistle... ♪
Whistle, baby, whistle, baby ♪

♪ Let me know ♪

♪ Girl, I'm gonna show you
how to do it ♪
♪ Oh, baby

♪ And we start real slow ♪
♪ Gonna show you how to do it

♪ You just put your lips together

♪ Gonna show you how to do it

♪ And you come real close ♪
♪ Do it, do it, do it, baby

♪ Can you blow my whistle,
baby, whistle, baby ♪

♪ Oh, oh

♪ Here we go

(whistling tune) ♪ Hey! Hey! ♪

♪ Oh, oh

♪ Blow my whistle, baby

♪ Oh ♪ Whistle, baby ♪

♪ Here we go.

(audience cheering)

(One Directions' "Live
While You're Young" begins)

♪ Dah, nah-nah, nah, nah

♪ Chick, chick, chick ♪

♪ Dah-dah,
nah-nah, nah-nah

♪ Chick, chick, chick ♪

♪ Hey, girl, I'm waiting on ya

♪ I'm waiting on ya

♪ Come on and let me sneak you out ♪

♪ And have a celebration

♪ A celebration

♪ The music up, the window's down ♪

♪ Yeah, we'll be doing what we do ♪

♪ Just pretending that we're cool ♪

♪ And we know it, too

♪ We know it, too ♪
♪ Whoo! ♪

♪ Yeah, we'll keep
doing what we do ♪

♪ Just pretending that we're cool ♪

♪ So tonight

♪ Let's go crazy,
crazy, crazy (cheering)

♪ Till we see the sun

♪ I know we only met, but
let's pretend it's love ♪

♪ And never, never,
never stop for anyone ♪

♪ Tonight let's get some,
and live while we're young ♪

♪ Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh,
oh-oh, oh, oh, oh ♪

♪ Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh,
oh-oh, oh, oh, oh ♪

♪ Want to live while we're young ♪

♪ Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh,
oh-oh, oh, oh, oh ♪

♪ Tonight let's get some,
and live while we're young ♪

♪ Nah, nah-nah,
nah-nah ♪

♪ Nah-nah, nah,
nah-nah, nah-nah ♪

♪ Dah, nah-nah,
nah-nah, nah-nah ♪

♪ Nah-nah,
nah, nah-nah ♪

♪ And girl

♪ Tonight we're about
to make some memories ♪

♪ Tonight ♪ Oh-oh,
oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh ♪

♪ I want to live while we're young ♪

♪ Oh-oh, oh-oh,
oh-oh, oh-oh ♪

♪ We want to live
while we're young ♪

♪ Let's go crazy,
crazy, crazy (cheering)

♪ Till we see the sun

♪ I know we only met, but
let's pretend it's love ♪

♪ And never, never,
never stop for anyone ♪

♪ Tonight let's get some,
and live while we're young ♪

♪ Gonna live, gonna live ♪

♪ We're gonna live
while we're young ♪

♪ Gonna live, gonna live ♪

♪ Gonna live while we're young ♪

♪ Gonna live, gonna live ♪

♪ Want to live while we're young ♪

♪ Tonight let's get some

♪ And live while we're young.

(audience cheering)

KURT: You okay?

Mm. Yeah. I was having a moment.

You know, every year, over,

like, an assortment of pies,
my dads and I would sing

these holiday medleys by the piano.

And, I don't know, I'm just
starting to feel like maybe

that part of my life is over.

Oh, sweetie, as long as
we're in each other's lives,

holiday medleys will never be over.

(whispers): Promise me?

Okay. (gasps) How's it going?

Oh, this bird is done. Oh.

Yeah. (knocking)

All right, Kurt, do you
want to do the honors?

No, thanks. I'm not
even having turkey after

the way you guys manhandled it.

Can I help you?

Isabelle Wright invited
us to an Orphan Party here?

Oh, right. Uh, yeah,
apparently, we're having a party.

Oh. Okay. Welcome. Come on in.

KURT: By the way,

have any of you heard from Isabelle?

I tried calling her earlier,
but I got her voice mail.

She was stopping at some new
club opening next to Pyramid

over in the East
Village. (phone buzzing)

Oh, wait. This is her now.

Uh, hello?

Hey, I'm calling you back.

Ooh, she's been a bitch tonight.

(car horn honking)

And by bitch, I mean this rain.

No cabs nowhere.

So I had to put on the wig
and the heels and the lashes

and the ear, and take a train

to the club.

So I hope you're up, girl,

'cause we are all coming over.

Lock the door, lower the blinds,

light up the smoke machine,
and put on your heels,

'cause I know exactly what we need.

♪ Let's have a kiki

♪ I want to have a kiki
♪ Lock the doors tight

♪ Let's have a kiki ♪ Mother

♪ I'm gonna let you have it

♪ Let's have a kiki

♪ I want to have a kiki

♪ Dive, turn, work

♪ Let's have a kiki

♪ We're gonna serve
and work and turn ♪

♪ H-honey

Wait, wait. What's a kiki?

♪ A kiki is a party

♪ For calming all your nerves

♪ We're spilling tea and
dishing just desserts ♪

♪ When they deserve

♪ And though the sun is rising

♪ Few may choose to leave

♪ So shade that lid
and we'll all bid ♪

♪ Adieu to your ennui

♪ Let's have a kiki

♪ I want to have a kiki
♪ Lock the doors tight

♪ Let's have a kiki ♪ Mother

♪ I'm gonna let you have it

♪ Let's have a kiki

♪ I want to have a
kiki, dive, turn, work ♪

♪ Let's have a kiki

♪ We're gonna serve
and work and turn ♪

♪ It's turkey lurkey time

♪ Tom turkey ran away
but he just came home ♪

♪ It's turkey lurkey time

♪ He's really home to
stay, never one to roam ♪

♪ Let's make a wish

♪ And may all your
wishes come true ♪

♪ Turkey lurkey

♪ Goosey loosey

♪ Some for Uncle Joe

♪ Some for Cousin Lucy

♪ Everybody gather round the table ♪

♪ Dig in, dinner's being served ♪

♪ Eat all the turkey you are able ♪

♪ Can't you see a
partridge in a pear tree? ♪

♪ Climb up and bring
it down for me ♪

♪ That's something
I would like to see ♪

♪ This kiki is marvelous

♪ Kiki, Soso, oui oui, non non

♪ Kiki, Soso

♪ Oui oui, non non

♪ Let's have a kiki I
want to have a kiki ♪

♪ Lock the doors tight

♪ Let's have a kiki,
hunty, drop her ♪

♪ I'm gonna let you have it

♪ Let's have a kiki

♪ I want to have a kiki,
boots, turn, queen ♪

♪ Let's have a kiki

♪ We're gonna serve
and work and turn ♪

♪ Let's have a kiki!

(whoops, laughs)

This is the best Thanksgiving ever!

If I timed this right,

Robin will wake up just as the
New Directions hit the stage.

She's a very fussy baby,

so she'll be wailing through
their entire performance.

Is this seat taken?

Oh, my goodness! Oh,
my goodness! (laughs)

Oh, so good to see you.
I'm so sorry I'm late.

You made it, didn't you? You made it.

America is thrilled.

ANNOUNCER: They traveled 87 miles

by horse and buggy

to drop an old school beat.

The Rosedale Mennonites!

♪ America

♪ Ah...

♪ Over the river and
through the woods ♪

♪ To Grandmother's house we go

♪ The horse knows the
way to carry the sleigh ♪

♪ Through the white
and drifted snow ♪

♪ Over the river and
through the woods ♪

♪ Trot fast, my dapplgray e

♪ Spring over the ground
like a hunting hound ♪

♪ For this is Thanksgiving Day

♪ She'll be coming round
the mountain when she comes ♪

♪ She'll be coming round

♪ The mountain when she comes

♪ Oh, when she comes

♪ She'll be coming
round the mountain ♪

♪ She'll be coming
round the mountain ♪

♪ She'll be coming round
the mountain when she comes ♪

♪ A...

♪ Mer... i... ca

♪ America!

(cheering, whistling)

I love you guys. Good job.

(whispering): Mr. Shue is here.

(cell phone buzzing) What?

What? Yes.



Can you hear me? It's
kind of loud out here.

Um, yeah, yeah, I can hear you.

Have you guys performed yet?

Uh, no, not yet.

Kurt, I just want you to know that

no matter...

Just let me talk for a second.

Look, you've... you've said
you're sorry a million times.


I believe you.

And I'm trying to forgive you, but...

...I'm just not there yet.


it's Thanksgiving, and
it's sectionals, and...

I miss you like crazy.

And... I can't stand not talking to you,

even though I'm mad at you.

'Cause you're still my best friend.

You're mine, too.

At Christmas, we... we need to
have a mature heart-to-heart.

And maybe if it's cold enough,

we can go ice skating
on the Auglaize River,

and get hot chocolate

anywhere but the Lima Bean,

because when I was working
there I saw a mouse.


So, uh, we're really gonna
see each other at Christmas?


Well, don't let any of
those hideous Warblers win.

All right?

Break a leg.

Happy Thanksgiving.

H-happy Thanksgiving.

Kurt, I love you so much.

I love you, too.

(sniffles, phone beeps)

(dance music playing)

(music fades)

You okay?


You don't look okay.

Okay, fine, I'm not okay.

Look, look...

It's just nerves.

It's a good thing. You can use it.

I don't know how it's a good thing

when I haven't slept in days,

and I'm sweating

when it's not even hot,

and I feel like if we don't win,

it's going to be all my fault.

I'm going to let all you guys down.

Finn, the graduates, and my mom.

Jake, you got a second?

Not now. Can it wait?

Not really. I need you
to take the dance lead.

I think I sprained my
ankle during warm-ups.

You're not limping. What's going on?

Look, it was really cool what you did,

but a few days of rehearsal and practice

doesn't make me as good as you.

And you don't put in

second-string QB just to be nice.

Because it's not nice... the whole team

suffers, and we have to win this.

Just do it, okay?

(sighs) Yeah.

ANNOUNCER: Ladies and gentlemen,

please welcome to the stage,

the New Directions!

Come on.

You're gonna kill this. Hm.

(audience cheering)

All right.

Good luck, you guys.

(Psy's "Gangnam Style" begins)

♪ Oppa gangnam style

♪ Gangnam style

♪ Ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba

♪ Naje-neun ttasaroun

♪ Inkanjeo-gin yeoja

♪ Keopi hanjanye yeoyureuraneun ♪

♪ Pumkyeok I-nneun yeoja

♪ Bami omyeon shimjangi
tteugeowojineun yeoja ♪

♪ Keureon banjeon I-nneun yeoja ♪

♪ Ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba

♪ Naneun sana-i naje-neun
neomankeum ttasaroun ♪

♪ Geureon sanai

♪ Keopi shikgido jeone wonsyas ♪

♪ Ttaerineun sana-i

♪ Bami omyeon shimjangi
teojyeobeorineun sana-i ♪

♪ Keureon sana-i

♪ Ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba

♪ Areumdawo

♪ Sarangseureowo

♪ Keurae neo ♪ Hey! ♪

♪ Keurae baro neo ♪ Hey! ♪

♪ Areumdawo

♪ Sarangseureowo

♪ Keurae neo

♪ Hey! ♪
♪ Keurae baro neo

♪ Hey! ♪

Chigeumbu-teo kal dekkaji


(audience cheering)

♪ Oppa gangnam style

♪ Gangnam style

♪ Op, op, op, op

♪ Oppa gangnam style

♪ Uh

♪ Gangnam style

♪ Op, op, op, op

♪ Oppa gangnam style

♪ Eh...

♪ Sexy lady

♪ Op, op, op, op

♪ Oppa gangnam style

♪ Eh...

♪ Sexy lady

♪ Op, op, op, op

♪ Ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba

♪ Ttwiineun nom keu wiie

♪ Naneun nom, baby, baby

♪ Naneun mwol jom aneun
nom, ttwiineun nom ♪

♪ Keu wiie naneun nom, baby, baby ♪

♪ Naneun mwol jom aneun nom
♪ You know what I'm saying

♪ Oppa gangnam style

♪ Ba, ba, ba, ba, ba

♪ Eh... sexy lady

♪ Op, op, op, op

♪ Oppa gangnam style

(distantly): ♪ Eh... sexy lady

(normal): ♪ Op, op, op, op

♪ Ba, ba, ba, ba, ba,
ba, oppa gangnam style ♪

♪ Uh!

(audience cheering)