Glee (2009–2015): Season 3, Episode 3 - Asian F - full transcript

Emma's parents come for a visit, and Mike struggles with his grades while his parents work to get him back on track.

So here's what you missed on
Glee: Emma's living with Will,

which has really been helping
her OCD, which is good, because

she's helping Artie and
Beiste direct West Side Story.

Rachel seems like a shoo-in for Maria,
and Kurt's running for class president

so he can get into NYADA. Thank
you in advance for your votes.

But Brittany quit as his campaign
manager so she can run, too.

I'm also a unicorn. And
th's what you missed on Glee!

Five, six..., eight.

(piano vamping)

You're late.

I know. I overslept.

It's 4:30 in the afternoon.

My alarm clock went off 30
minutes late this morning.

Kind of shifted my whole schedule.

Anyway, what's Santana doing here?

I've resworn my
allegiance to the Glee Club

without telling Coach Sue.

Mercedes, I'll catch you up.

(piano vamping) Five, six, seven.

Five, six...

Mercedes, you okay? My stomach hurts.

I think I'm gonna be sick.
Why are you babying her?

I mean, she can't do
three steps without puking

'cause she ate at Quizno's

before she showed up in this joint.

Mr. Shue, you have us scheduled
to the second right now.

With school, Glee Club and Booty Camp,

when else am I supposed to eat?

When the rest of us
do. Oh, like you eat!

It's not about eating.
It's about attitude.

Sectionals are coming up, and
if we don't give it our all...

I am doing my best.

No, you're not.

It's not about doing your best anymore.

It's about doing better.

Morning, sunshine. Hey.

Do you want me to iron
some bacon for you?

Um, I was looking for a
fresh box of cornflakes,

and I found this

hidden way back in the pantry.

It's a stash of wedding magazines.

Wedding, Inc.,

Modern Bridal, Marry Me Monthly...

Oh, wow.

Terri must have had a massive
bridal magazine addiction.

And an autographed
headshot of Vera Wang.

"To Emma. Always Marry Up!"

Right, that's slightly
harder to explain away.

Look, Emma, I'm not scared
of your inner bridezilla.

I mean, that's clearly
the road we're headed down,

and marriage is just one of...

several milestones I look

forward to sharing with you.

But because I don't like secrets,

I thought I'd share my
secret stash with you.

I was a bachelor for over a year.

Kept me off of Craig's List.

Okay, we'll just put that over here.

But Emma, I have to ask you a question:

if you're serious about you and me...

why haven't I met your parents?

Be-because, um, they're dead.

You spoke to them on
the phone last night.

I spoke to their ghosts last night.

I have ghost parents.

Okay, can't lie to you. Um...

I-I-I just want to
take it really slowly.

You know, I don't want to rush things.

And-And I feel like meeting

my parents right now
would be a bad idea.

(school bell rings)

I must say Mr. Mike Chang
Sr., this is highly unusual.

I have no grounds to drug
test your son every day.

My grandmother in China
knew three English phrases:

"Coca-Cola," "Kiss My Grits"
and "Harvard University."

Deep in Hubei Province
this old woman knew

the best school in the United States.

That's where my son belongs.

But what makes you think he's on drugs?

He's one of our best students,

a football star, and he
can bust a serious move.

My son got an A-minus
on his chemistry test.

An A-minus is an Asian F.

Mr. Chang Sr., I don't want
to get in your business,

as they say, but don't you
think perhaps you're putting

too much pressure on Mike Chang Jr.?

An A-minus won't do.

It's the girlfriend.

She's a distraction.

Here's where we agree, sir.

Tina Cohen-Chang and her
vampire ways have no place

in this school.

(hisses) (gasps)

Excuse me from gym all year

or I'll drain your spicy
curry blood. (hisses)

It's clear to me that
either Michael is on drugs

or that he's bitten off
more than he can chew.

He needs to quit Glee Club.

Performing is a waste of his time. What?

(whispers): The consultant
we hired said that

it was meaningless on your transcript.

In fact, he said it was a detriment.

I'll do better, Dad. I promise.

Get me a chemistry tutor.
I'll pay for it myself.

Just give me one more chance.

(bell ringing)

(blows whistle) All
right, listen up, ladies!

Number one: I kicked a fire hydrant

when I found out Ace
of Cakes was canceled,

hence the crutches.

Number two: the entire
wrestling team has come down

with a flesh-eating staph infection

so, fellas, wash yourselves,

and that includes your bat
caves and your bramble patches.

Number three: Tinsley,

Puckerman, Azimio, show me your moves.

What moves? Oh, don't play stupid.

You're all dancing in West Side Story

unless I specifically excuse you.

Tire shop every afternoon.

Coach, no disrespect, but
my dad, he didn't raise me

to be no damn ballerina.

In fact, my dad, he
didn't even raise me.

Ballet improves your
coordination, it boosts

your IQ, and it gets half of the NFL

on Dancing With the Stars! Boo-yah!

By Wednesday, everyone is to
show up at audition and dance.

How are we supposed to
learn to dance by Wednesday?

Figure it out.

(bell ringing)

Baby, what was that? What?

You just hugged your arch-nemesis
right before the audition.

You think before I cleat
some dude I hug him?

You think Wonder Woman hugs the
Cheeta before the Amazonian smackdown?

It's not like that.
Rachel and I are friends.

Not right now you're not.
This is winner-takes-all.

Maria's the lead and you
need to be playing that part.

Don't be going crazy now on me, Shane.

People are saying that Rachel
Berry's the one to beat.

Why don't you know that
you're the one to beat?

You're fabulous, baby.

I know...

You don't.

You always make me watch Dreamgirls.

You say you're Beyoncé,

but on the inside you
feel like Effie White.

You're better than Rachel Berry, baby.

I've been here for three years...

and no one's ever said that to me.

(Jennifer Hudson's "Spotlight" begins)

♪ Ooh-hoo,
ooh-hoo-hoo ♪

♪ Are you a man who loves,
cherishes and cares for me? ♪

* Is that you, is that
you, is that you? Yeah *

♪ Are you a guard in the
prison, maximum security? ♪

* Is that you, is that
you, is that you? Yeah *

♪ Do we stay home all the time ♪

♪ 'Cause you want me to yourself? ♪

* Is that you, is that
you, is that you? Yeah *

♪ Or am I locked away out of fear ♪

♪ That I'll find someone else? ♪

* Is that you, is that you? Yeah *

♪ Well, I don't like living
under your spotlight ♪

♪ Maybe if you treat me right ♪

* You won't have to worry *
* You won't ever have to worry *

* No * * No *

♪ Boy, you ought to be
ashamed of yourself ♪

♪ What the hell do you
think you're doing? ♪

♪ Loving me, loving me so wrong ♪

* Baby, all I do
is try * * Try *

* To show you that
you're my * * My *

♪ One and only guy ♪

* Only guy *

♪ No matter who may come along ♪

♪ Open your eyes 'cause,
baby, I don't like ♪

♪ Ooh-hoh,
ooh, hoo-hoo ♪

♪ Hey, 'cause I don't like ♪

* Living under your spotlight *

♪ No, no ♪

♪ Just because you think I might ♪

♪ Find somebody worthy, no, no ♪

♪ I don't like, yeah ♪

* Living under your spotlight *
* Living under your spotlight *

* Maybe if you treat me right *

♪ Treat me right, yeah ♪

♪ You don't never have to worry ♪

♪ I don't like. ♪

(song ends)

Wow! Yeah!

Whoo! Beautiful.


Mercedes, I've never
seen you like this before.

Really. You're so...

Glamorous. Glamorous.

Well, I just wanted you guys to see me

the way that I see myself
now: as a leading lady.

Well, it was wonderful. Beautiful.

ARTIE: So good.

You killed it!

I'm so proud of you.

(bell ringing)

Ready for song practice?
Your audition is tomorrow.

I'm not auditioning. What
are you talking about?

We've been practicing
your singing every day!

This is your chance to
break out and show everybody

that you're more than just
a fleet-footed dance ninja.

Riff is perfect for you.

He sings, he dances, he dies.
It's the second male lead, Mike.

I'm overwhelmed and losing focus.

Football, Glee Club, Booty Camp
so we're ready for Sectionals.

I got an A-minus, Tina.

You got an Asian F?

My dad is all over me.

You shouldn't have to hide your dreams.

Just be honest with him.

Oh, like how you were so honest

about pretending to
stutter all that time?

Point taken.

(bell ringing)

With only two days left

for people to announce their candidacy,

that leaves me and Brittany

running in this race.

Which is more like me
running, and you know,

Brittany just whimsically
hopping and skipping nearby.

No one takes her seriously.

That's so amazing, Kurt.

I mean, you can
practically add the moniker

of "President" to your curriculum
vitae now. NYADA is gonna eat that up.

According to the new Jacob
Ben Israel straw poll--

here, take one take one, take... Okay.

Um, according to the soft numbers,

I'm ahead by Brit by 11%. Really?

This could be a cakewalk.
SANTANA: Nice blouse, Hummel.

Really brings out the
color of your pink eye.

So, I assume I can rely on your
vote, Rachel. I'm sorry, Brittany,

but I've already pledged
my fidelity to Kurt.

Oh, so you're cool with flushing
McKinley High's future down

the magical poop-stealing water
chair? Did you know that in six years

at this school, we've only exclusively
had male student council presidents?

And yeah, Kurt looks like
Jimmy Fallon's butch daughter,

but a vote for him would only empower

yet another frank and beans.

Yes. Where has that
patriarchy gotten us?

Double-digit inflation,
economic freefall,

oil spills, war in Afghanistan.

I tweeted about Brit's flash
mob pep rally in the gym,

and we're all showing up to
support her with girl power.

Yes, boys have made one
helluva mess in this school,

and there's only one way to clean it up.

* Girls, we run this
mother, yeah * * Girls *

♪ Girls, we run this mother ♪

* Who run the world? * * Girls *

* Who run the world?
* * Girls, girls *

* Who run the world? * * Girls *

* Who run the world?
* * Girls, girls *

♪ It's hot up in here,
DJ, don't be scared ♪

♪ To run this, run this back ♪

♪ I'm reppin' for the girls
who taking over the world ♪

♪ Help me raise a glass
for the college grads ♪

♪ Anyone rolling, I'll let you
know what time it is, check ♪

♪ You can't hold me ♪

♪ I work my 9:00 to
5:00 and I cut my check ♪

♪ This goes out to all
my women getting it in ♪

♪ You on your grind ♪

♪ To all the men that
respect what I do ♪

♪ Please accept my shine ♪

♪ Boy, I know you love it,
how we're smart enough ♪

♪ To make these millions, strong
enough to bear the children ♪

♪ Then get back to business ♪

♪ See, you better not play me ♪

♪ Don't come here, baby ♪

♪ Hope you still like me ♪

♪ If you pay me ♪

♪ My persuasion ♪

♪ Can build a nation ♪

♪ Endless power ♪

♪ Our love we can devour ♪

♪ You'll do anything for me ♪

* Who run the world?
* * Girls, girls *

* Who run the world?
* * Girls, girls *

* Who run the world?
* * Girls, girls *

* Who run the world?
* * Girls, girls *

* Who run the world?
* * Girls, girls *

* Who run the world?
* * Girls, girls *

* Who run the world?
* * Girls, girls *

* Who run the world?
* * Girls, girls *

* Who run the world? * * Girls *

♪ Who are we? ♪

♪ What we run? ♪

♪ The world ♪

♪ Who run this mother? ♪

♪ Who are we? ♪

♪ What we run? ♪

♪ The world ♪

♪ Who run this? Yeah ♪

♪ Who are we? ♪

♪ What do we run? ♪

♪ We run the world ♪

♪ Who run the world? ♪

* Girls! *


Hi. I'm Brittany S. Pierce,

and I'm your next
senior class president.



Harvard/Yale 1968.

Bush/Gore 2000. And now... I know.

It's too close to call. What is?


We have two very strong,

but very different
candidates tied for the role.

Rachel Berry and...?


I thought Berry had it in the bag,

and then Stealth-Attack Jones came in

and just pancaked me emotionally.

Yeah. I mean, right before our
eyes, Mercedes just transformed.

She had a new maturity, there was

a confidence I've never seen before.

Her performance was so truthful.

I think our little girl's

all grown up.

Wow. I'm so happy to hear that.

I don't know what you're doing,
Schuester, but it's working.

Well, I have been pushing
her pretty hard in Booty Camp.

Good. Good for Mercedes.

Yes, but very hard for us.


I mean, Rachel is Maria.

Isn't she? Yes.

On the other hand,

Mercedes is...

Is the riskier choice, no doubt.

And she might even be
the more exciting one.

It's just too close to call.

Well, you know what
you need to do, then.

Let me get this straight.
You can't make up your minds,

so we have to try out again?

In the biz, it's called a callback.

With such an iconic role as Maria,

it can't appear as if they're
just giving me the part.

We'd like you both to come back

on Thursday for

the ultimate Maria-off.

Done. I can't speak for Mercedes,

but I'll be singing the timeless
Maria classic "I Feel Pretty."

Actually, that's too easy, Rachel.

We've picked a song that
we think has the potential

to show off both of your talents,

in unexpected ways.

"Out Here On My Own" from the seminal

musical Fame.

I know it. I lived it.

(school bell ringing)


Look, in the spirit of Broadway
camaraderie, I'd like to

offer you a hug to congratulate
you on your callback.

You know what, Rachel?

Hug me after I get the part.

(school bell ringing)

I'm leaving right now to go meet
the Chem tutor at The Lima Bean.

I promise I'll bring my grade up.

And, Dad, I'm so sorry
for disappointing you.




We've worked so hard
to get to where we are.

And this, this is how
you waste your time?

Dancing is something
you do at a wedding.

It's a hobby, not a career.

(echoing): There's no future in it.

What happens if you hurt yourself?

You're one injury away
from having nothing.

You will not waste your life.

TINA: So beautiful.

You don't talk that much,
you hardly ever sing,

but when I see you do
that, it's who you are.

It's what makes me feel you.

Mike, you got to know by
now, when I see you dance...'s why I fell in love with you.

ARTIE: Mike Chang?

The kid's never late.

He runs like an expensive Swiss watch

reproduced cheaply in China.

Okay, next.

Uh, I'm sorry I'm late.

I'm here to audition for Riff.

Uh, Mike, you know that's not
just a dancing part, right?

I do, yes.

I've been working on my singing.


(band playing "Cool")

♪ Boy, boy, crazy boy ♪

♪ Get cool, boy ♪

♪ Got a rocket in your pocket ♪

♪ Keep coolly cool, boy ♪

♪ Don't get hot,
'cause, man, you got ♪

♪ Some high times ahead ♪

♪ Take it slow and, Daddy-O ♪

♪ You can live it
up and die in bed ♪

♪ Boy, boy, crazy boy ♪

♪ Stay loose, boy ♪

♪ Breeze it, buzz it, easy does it ♪

♪ Turn off the juice, boy ♪

♪ Go, man, go, but not
like a yo-yo schoolboy ♪

♪ Just play it cool, boy ♪

♪ Real cool ♪

♪ Cool! ♪

♪ Go! ♪

♪ Crazy! Cool! Go! ♪

♪ Crazy! Go! ♪

♪ Boy, boy, crazy boy ♪

♪ Stay loose, boy ♪

♪ Breeze it, buzz it, easy does it ♪

♪ Turn off the juice, boy ♪

♪ Just play it cool, boy ♪

♪ Real cool. ♪

(music ends with flourish)


ARTIE: Yeah! Wow!

BEISTE: Wow, Chang, you must have worked

really closely with my boys there.

That was some really fancy footwork.

I just hope you didn't waste

too much of your time.

It's what I love to do.

It's never going to
be a waste of my time.

Good job.


So no girls have tried out

for your fancy new rogue singing club?

Why do you think that is?


Singing's just musical talking.

Well, I guess if I was
a girl in this school,

and I wanted to be in a singing
group, I'd be in New Directions.


Enjoy your enormous bowl
of disgusting creamy pasta.


Hey, Will.


What, no chicken?

Mm, I'm carbo
- loading, Will.

I got to keep my strength up.

I got football, I'm running
the student council elections,

and you got me doing that musical.

Thank God for Emma.

She's a hard worker.

You should be really proud of her.

Yeah, well, I just wish
she was more proud of me.

Mm, come on.

I mean, I know I'm not
a dentist like Carl.

I don't make $80,000 a year.

Punkin, what the hell
are you talking about?

That girl is crazy about you.

She hasn't introduced me to her parents.

Well, introduce yourself!

You're a catch, Will.

You got nothing to be nervous about.

You're everything a future
in-law could ask for.

You think so?

You bet your sweet bippy.

Did you know Breadstix delivers?

That's awesome.

The cast list goes up on Friday.

Are you nervous?

A little. I'm trying
not to think about it.

I wouldn't be. My mole
in the casting office

says that there's only one actor

they're seriously considering
for the role of Tony,

and his initials are B.A.

Kurt, they're beautiful.

But what are they for?

You killed your audition, Blaine.

If anyone else got Tony,

including me, the Wrath of Sondheim

would fall upon William McKinley

like a plague of Shubert Alley locusts.

These are to celebrate... you.

You always zig when I
think you're about to zag,

and I... I just...
I love that about you.

Thank you.

(whispers): Right.

Okay, so, before we dive
into today's Booty Camp,

I just want to say how
impressed Mike and I have been

with everyone's progress. Uh...

Brittany, why are you here?

'Cause I intend on, you know,

dancing my way into the voters' hearts.


All right... everyone up!

Now, your homework assignment
was "The Widow Maker,"

perhaps the hardest show
choir dance move ever.

Now, when you get it right,
one of us is gonna tap you out,

then you can have a seat.

Uh, five, six, seven, eight!

(piano music begins)

(speaking indistinctly)


(talking quietly)

You have it. Yeah.

MIKE: Come on,
Mercedes-- down, open.

Come on, Finn, you can
do it! No, he can't.

Oh, yeah? Yeah.

Come on, Mercedes.

Good job, buddy.

MIKE: Down... open...

Come on, Mercedes, down...

open... up...

My ankle hurts. Push through it.

I don't feel good. You're fine.

No, I'm not!

Look, Mercedes, I want you to
be the best you can be, okay?

Did you even practice this?

Stop picking on me!

You're always singling me
out, making me look bad!

That's crazy. No, you're crazy

for not letting me shine!

Where's Rachel, huh?

I don't see her here,
being a part of the "team."

Rachel practices every night.

No one asked you, Finn.

Everyone knows that
Rachel is your favorite.

That's not true.

No, it's true-- you
give that skinny,

ass-kisser everything!

And, you know, for two
years, you know, I took it.

But not anymore!

I'm done!

You know, I've outgrown you.

I've outgrown all of you.


You walk out that door,
you're out of Glee Club.

(light switches clanking)

("It's All Over" from Dreamgirls begins)

Mr. Shue was supposed to love me.

♪ I turn my back and find
myself out on the line ♪

♪ You could've warned me ♪

♪ But that would've been too kind ♪

♪ I've been warning you for
months to clean up your act ♪

♪ You've been late,
you've been mean ♪

♪ Giving all kinds of stupid flack ♪

♪ That's a lie, that's a lie ♪

♪ It's just, I haven't
been feeling that well ♪

♪ Effie, please, stop
excusing yourself ♪

♪ You've been late,
you've been mean ♪

♪ And getting fatter all the time ♪

♪ Now you're lyin', you're lyin' ♪

♪ I've never been so thin ♪

♪ You're lyin', you're lyin' ♪

♪ 'Cause you're
knockin' off that piece ♪

♪ Who thinks she's
better than everybody ♪

♪ Running for president ♪

♪ She ain't better than anybody ♪

♪ She ain't nothin' but common ♪

♪ Now, listen to me, Miss
Blame-it-on-the-world ♪

♪ See, I put up with
you for much too long ♪

♪ I have put up with your bitchin' ♪

♪ I put up with your naggin' ♪

♪ And all your screamin' too ♪

♪ Oh, now when are you two
gonna stop all this fighting? ♪

Stay out of this, Finn, this
is between Santana and me!

♪ Yeah! Well, it's between me, too ♪

♪ I'm as much a part of
this group as anybody else ♪

♪ And I'm tired, Effie ♪

♪ I'm tired ♪

♪ Of all the problems
you're makin' up ♪

♪ I always knew you
two were together ♪


♪ Always knew you two
were gangin' up on me ♪

♪ Kurt had nothing to do
with this change, it was you ♪

♪ It was you always
thinking of you ♪

♪ Always thinking of you ♪

♪ Lay off, Effie ♪

♪ Just take the money and run ♪

You in this with them, Puck?

♪ Cool it, Effie ♪

♪ This time you know
what you've done ♪

So they bought your behind, too, huh?

♪ I said, cool it, Effie ♪

♪ This time you've gone too far ♪

Oh, I can go further. I can go further!

♪ I don't wanna stay around this ♪

♪ I'm just breakin'
in to this business ♪

♪ This is between all of you ♪

♪ This is none of my affair ♪

♪ I'm not feelin'
well, I've got pain ♪

CHORUS: * Effie, we all got pain *

♪ Oh, for two years,
I stuck with you ♪

♪ I was your sister ♪

CHORUS: * You were trouble *

♪ And now you're telling me ♪

♪ It's all over ♪

CHORUS: * Now we're telling you *

♪ It's all over ♪

♪ And now, I'm telling you ♪

♪ I ain't goin' ♪

♪ It's all over ♪

♪ I ain't goin' ♪

♪ It's all over... ♪

(switch clicks)

It's over.

(school bell rings)


(school bell rings)


What are you doing here?

What are you doing, Michael?

I'm... just warming up for football.

How can you look at me like that

and lie to me?

I got a call from your chemistry
tutor when you didn't show up.

I covered for you with your father.

So now I'm a liar, too.

The least you could do

is tell me the truth.

I auditioned for the school musical.

I don't want to be a
surgeon or a lawyer, Mom.

I want to be an artist.


And the only time I really
feel special is when I do...


Mom, please don't cry.


my job is to encourage
you to live your dreams,

not mine, not your dad's.

I was raised a certain way,

and my parents had expectations of me

and I simply was not
as courageous as my son.

I let go of my dreams but

I never want you to do that.

Do you hear me?


do you know if we earned that part

in the school musical yet?

Well, when you do, we're going
to tell your father about it.


So what dream did you let go of?

Like you, I loved dancing.

But your waigong never
let me take lessons.

Some people think I'm
a pretty good teacher.



(school bell rings)

Rachel, focus.

You want this more than she does.

I do.

You've earned this.

The part's already yours.

It's been waiting for you,
Mercedes; just take it.

I will.

Rachel Berry? Mercedes Jones?

Go get it, baby.


you're both wonderful.

Screw West Side Story,
this is Clash of the Titans.

I have a feeling that
people are going to be

talking about this face-off
for the rest of our lives.

Heads or tails? Heads. Tails.

Heads. Yes!


Mercedes can go first.


("Out Here On My Own"
from Fame begins)

♪ Sometimes I wonder ♪

♪ Where I've been ♪

♪ Who I am ♪

♪ Do I fit in? ♪

♪ Make believin' is hard alone ♪

♪ Out here on my own ♪

♪ We're always provin' ♪

♪ Who we are ♪

♪ Always reachin' ♪

♪ For that risin' star ♪

♪ To guide me far ♪

♪ And shine me home ♪

♪ Out here on my own ♪

♪ When I'm down ♪

♪ And feelin' blue ♪

♪ I close my eyes ♪

♪ So I can be with you ♪

BOTH: * Oh, baby, be strong for me *

♪ Baby, belong ♪

RACHEL: * To me *

♪ Help me through ♪

♪ Help me need you ♪

♪ Sometimes I wonder ♪

♪ Where I've been ♪

♪ Who I am ♪

♪ Do I fit in? ♪

♪ I may not win ♪

♪ But I can't be thrown ♪

♪ Out here ♪

♪ On... ♪

♪ On my own ♪

♪ Out here ♪

♪ On my ♪

♪ Own. ♪


Wow! Yeah!


(audience whooping)

That was excellent.
You were amazing.

She was better than me.

(school bell ringing)

Coach Beiste, I have something
very important we need to discuss.


What is this? Are we having
a romantic dinner? Sort of.

I invited your parents over.

Is that my little freaky-deaky?

Okay. I'm gonna say hi in one minute.

One minute, one minute.
Oh, God, oh my God.

Why would you do this? I
wanted to meet your parents,

so I thought I'd take
the bull by the horns.

Right, it's okay, because maybe,
maybe we can get them to leave.

I will pretend like, um,
an ovarian cyst burst.

Works every time. Emma,
what is going on here?

Are you ashamed of me?


I'm ashamed of them.

What? Why?

My parents are ginger supremacists.

We're not ginger supremacists.

We're more ginger preservationists.

We don't hate anybody.

We just prefer the company of
other redheads, which is why we

enjoy the Red Oaks so
much. What's the Red Oaks?

It's a gingers-only country club.

It's really the only place
I feel I can be myself

and let my auburn hair down.

Did you know that if we're not careful,

redheads will be extinct
in 30 years? Extinct?

It's a recessive gene. If
we keep heading down the road

we're on, with everybody
just mixing with everybody,

we gingers will cease
to exist as a species.

Not really a separate species. Which is why
I'd really love to hear about your heritage.

I have to say, your
hair's a little wooly

for my taste, but those
beautiful blue eyes

are a very good sign. Now
Schuester is German, right?

I-I think so.

You're practically a Viking.

Hey. Well, that's a relief.

There's got to be some red
hair in that family tree.

Yeah, not like that Carl.

Oops. Looks like freaky-deaky's

coming down with a mean
case of the cleanies.

Don't bother trying to stop
her once she starts, Will.

We used to tie her thumbs
together, and she'd chew

right through the twine. Adorable.

I think it's weird. I
don't know where she got it.

Oh, I'm sorry, Amigo.

You're not our regular waitress.

RUSTY: Cindy! ROSE: You
can't be too careful.

I'm sorry, I don't mean
to be rude, but has anyone

ever told you that you're
both a little racist?

I'm sorry?

Excuse me, it's not racist
to be proud of the heritage

that you're trying to preserve, Will.

Well, maybe it isn't. But all
I know is that if Emma and I

were blessed enough to have a child,

I wouldn't care what he or she
looked like. And you know what?

If my child had OCD, I'd maybe
try to show a little compassion

instead of calling her a
name that makes her feel

like a freak.

These beans are a disaster.

RUSTY: These beans are what
happens when you sit out

an election, Rose. There
wasn't a ginger candidate.

(school bell rings)

I think we should talk, don't you?

About the, um, upcoming deadline
for the NYADA applications?

About you telling Coach Beiste that
you're running for senior class president.

Against me. Kurt, you
saw Mercedes, okay?

I'm not gonna get the part.
So I figured, if I win,

I'll make you vice president, and then
maybe you could just do vice-versa.

Rachel, if you win, yes, it'll better
your chances of getting into NYADA, yes.

But if I win, it could make a
huge difference at this school.

Not just for me, but kids like me.

Things could actually change for them.

So, whatever it takes, I'm winning.

Look, I just... I need
something for my senior year

that's gonna make me special,
that's gonna make me stand out.

I thought Maria was gonna
be that. You understand.

You're just as ambitious as I
am; that's why we're friends.

Rachel, in ten years, when
you look back on this time,

you're not gonna be thinking
about the clubs you belonged to

or the parts you had.

You'll be thinking about
the friends you had and...

and the ones you just tossed aside.


Please don't tell us that
we have to try out again.

No, we've come to a decision.

It was one of the hardest
decisions of my life,

and that includes when I had to sell

one of my two prize
donkeys to pay my gas bill.

I sold Kim, but I kept Khloe.

So, um, in the grand tradition
of the Special Olympics...

everybody wins. We're
double-casting Maria.

What the hell is "double-casting?"

It means that we'll
both get to play Maria.

You'll get your well-deserved
standing ovations

on Saturday matinees and
Sunday mornings for the Retired

Lima War Veterans, and I'll do
all the evening performances.

Actually, Rachel, we're adding a week.

You'll both get four
nights and two matinees.

Fair enough.

Mercedes, it'll be a pleasure
sharing the spotlight with you.

Are you double-casting any other roles?

No. Just... No. No.

Thank you for your time.

Where are you going?

Tell me you were better than me.

Tell me.

(stammers) Why is it that no one
ever wants to hurt her feelings?

You know, it's always been "The
Rachel Berry Show" around here.

But it's not gonna be for
me. No, not my senior year.

Mercedes, don't make
this a stupid pride thing.

Oh, it's a pride thing.
But it's not stupid.

Congratulations. You got the part.

I don't want it.

(school bell rings)

I got it.

I got it, like, by default.

They double-cast us, and
then Mercedes turned it down.

So... cool. You're gonna... you're
gonna be withdrawing from the race, then.

Look, Finn, when Brittany sang
that song about girls changing

the world, it got me
thinking, you know maybe...

maybe I can change the world.
By being Student Class President?

Look, make fun of it all
you want, but you need

to start thinking
about your future, too.

Oh, did you talk to
Kurt about the election?


He asked me who I was voting for.

What did you say?

I said I didn't know.


Son of a biscuit. I've lost count again.

(whispers): One.


Three... I'm so sorry.

I should've believed you when you told me
you didn't want me to meet your parents.

I didn't get it.

Emma, stop.


Come on, let's go to bed.

Wh-What are you doing?

I'm praying.

I do it all the time in my head,

but right now, it's just not enough.

And when I need help, I know
God hears me better on my knees.

Something about the acoustics
of the linoleum or something.


I wish I could make
things better for you, I...

I just don't know how.

I don't have any clue what
I'm doing down here... (laughs)

But I'm willing to learn.

(piano ballad plays)

♪ When you try your best,
but you don't succeed ♪

♪ When you get what you
want, but not what you need ♪

♪ When you feel so tired,
but you can't sleep ♪

♪ Stuck in reverse ♪

♪ And the tears come
streaming down your face ♪

♪ When you lose something
you can't replace ♪

♪ When you love someone,
but it goes to waste ♪

♪ Could it be worse? ♪

♪ Lights will guide you home ♪

♪ And ignite your bones ♪

♪ And I will try to fix you ♪

♪ ♪

♪ Tears stream down on your face ♪

♪ I promise you that I will
learn from my mistakes ♪

♪ Tears stream down on your face ♪

♪ And I... ♪

♪ Lights will guide you home ♪

♪ And ignite your bones ♪

* Ooh... *

♪ And I will try to fix you. ♪

ReSync By Kensei for KiNGS

Ms. Corcoran, I hear
you're starting a new group.

You're going to need some
star power, so here I am.