Glee (2009–2015): Season 3, Episode 19 - Prom-asaurus - full transcript

Brittany goes into high gear as class president to spearhead the prom. Then, after nominations are announced, the kids kick into campaign mode.

So here's what you missed
on Glee:

Rachel choked at her NYADA
audition, which meant she blew

the biggest audition of her life.
Oh, God.

Which, as far as
she's concerned, is now

pretty much over.
I had my chance and I choked.

Quinn's in a wheelchair,
but her rehab's going well,

partly because Joe's been
going with her.

Brittany probably
forgot she was

elected senior class president.

And Puck failed
his big geography exam

about Iberian precipitation,

which means
he's not gonna graduate.

And that's what you missed
on Glee.

Everything dies.

Maybe the saddest death of all

is the death of a dream.

For 18 years, I've had
Broadway, stardom.

It was like wings that kept me
hovering above the fray.

But I flew too close to the sun
and now they're gone

and I'm just Rachel
Barbra Berry of Lima, Ohio...

a flightless bird.

A penguin.

Do I look different?

I feel different.

In some ways, it's a relief...
to be part of the crowd.

My dreams are smaller now,
maybe even more real...

the wedding, winning
Nationals... but first, prom.

I'll never walk the red carpet

as a Tony
or Golden Globe nominee.

That's what you get
for having no backup plan.

Prom is my night
to trip the light fantastic.

Next to my wedding,
my prom dress will be

the most important gown
I ever wear.

I'm surprisingly
okay with it all.

That dream was just a favorite
old sweater that I kept around

even though
it didn't fit anymore.

I can grieve it and move on.

I may have lost NYADA,
but I still have Finn.

So I'm not going to get

everything I thought
I ever wanted.

Doesn't make me a loser.

What are you doing?

I am practicing my Prom
Queen victory wave.

I'm going to win.

You know, there's a lot of stiff
competition this year, Becky.

I wouldn't want you
to be disappointed.

Would you mind taking your
loser talk somewhere else?

I don't want to
catch your failure.

Sexy teen trollop.

Many months ago,

to much fanfare,

you were elected
senior class president.

Oh, yeah.
Since that day,

you have accomplished nothing
except one memorandum

written in crayon saying

"Drill, baby, drill."

Yeah, I no longer believe we
should be drilling for babies.

Your do-nothing presidency
has me seriously considering

abolishing the post

And as you are flunking
each of your classes,

you need class president

on your transcript if you hope
to gain admittance into college.

No, I don't. I've already
been accepted at Perdue.

The university?

No, the chicken factory.

Miss Pierce,
you are making a mockery

of this student government,

and if you don't make an impact
with the rest of your term,

your presidency will be
this school's last!

I now realize I wasted an entire
year belaboring the nuances

of my fluid teen sexuality
and getting caught up

in Lord Tubbington's
Ponzi schemes.

Then for a while,
I stopped talking.

But I don't want my presidency
to be the last one at McKinley.

I don't want that
to be my legacy.

Well, Madame President,
prom is coming up.

And if you want to
rehabilitate your image,

perhaps that's where
you should start.


I don't know
who any of you guys are.

Oh, we're
the Prom Committee.

We've been meeting
since September.

We've sent
you 14 memos.

Did you get my memo
about drilling for babies?


Good. 'Cause that's not

the solution
to soaring gas prices.

We're a little behind schedule,

but we think we have a great
theme for this year's prom.

This year's prom theme


"Castles in the Clouds."


I like your unicorns;
Those are great.

But I'm gonna have to say never,

'cause there's no way
I'm ever gonna let that happen.

Castles are very heavy,

so putting them on clouds
would be extremely dangerous.

I seriously think the three of
you should be put in jail.


Um, what about...
"Stairway to Heaven"?

Not unless we also build

escalators to heaven
for the disabled students.

Plus, I'm not

really sure if they're even
allowed into heaven.

It's clear that the three of you
are incompetent fools,

possibly some sort
of terrorist cell.

So, as president,
I'm gonna decide

what the prom theme
is going to be this year.

And I think...
that it should be...




The Bible told me that dinosaurs
and cavemen lived side by side

for millions of years
in peace,

and I think that's something

that we should
totally celebrate.

No, you can't
be serious.

That's the worst
prom theme ever.

When you insult my dinosaur
prom theme, that's bullying,

and I will not accept it.

By the power vested in me
as president, you are all fired.

Sorry, Rachel,
that includes you.

But I guess

I'll see you in Glee Club, so...

Good meeting, guys.

Good morning,
McKinley High!

First of all, to those of you
thoughtful enough to leave

maternity gifts
outside my office,

both I and my unborn child
thank you

for your lackluster Cracker
Barrel meat-and-cheese medleys,

and I'm sure that

my trash can
will find them delicious.

Now it's time

to announce this year's
Senior Prom Court nominees.

Your choices
for Prom King are...

Rick "The Stick" Nelson.


You know this!

President Brittany S. Pierce.

That's weird.

And also, Finn Hudson.

And now on to the category
we all really care about:

Prom Queen.

Becky for Prom Queen 2012!

Missy Gunderson.

Santana Lopez.

And Quinn Fabray.

Congratulations to
all our nominees...

Becky, Becky, Becky!
That's an antique!

I was robbed, Coach!

So are you bummed you didn't
get nominated for Prom Queen?

In what world would I ever be
nominated for Prom Queen?

Well, I voted for you.

And I got that
crossed-eyed dude

in my study hall
to vote for you, too.

That's very sweet of you, but
I'm not upset at all actually,

because I am gonna be
spending my entire prom night

dancing with my devastatingly
handsome future husband to be.

We'll make your posters
later, okay?


A big congrats to all
our prom nominees!

But, hey, listen up.

We are all winners,

Principal Figgins

asked New Directions
to sing again this year!

Come on!


All right.

Brittany has an

Hello, my fellow Americans.

The theme for this year's prom
will be...


Sheer genius.


I was inspired by
the new girl Joe,

who reminds me
of a cavewoman.

The refreshments
will be berries,

meat and rainwater.

As you are no
doubt aware,

the U.S. elections are
riddled with corruption.

Therefore, to keep
the prom elections

completely aboveboard,
I have appointed Santana

and Quinn to count the ballots.

What? That makes no sense!

Shut it, Richard Simmons.

Yes, Quinn's my homegirl,
but I don't trust her,

and you know she doesn't
trust me.

We'll keep each other honest.

You know,

It's actually
not a bad idea.

And last but not least,

all hair gel has been
banned from the prom.


I'm actually not joking.

Hair gel was not
invented until

almost 30 million years after
the Upper Paleolithic Stone Age.

And frankly,

I don't like the way you look.

Therefore, anyone who

shows up to prom
wearing hair gel will be

turned away
at the door.

I hereby decree this
to be the best prom



Let's start thinking
of... dinosaur songs.

Hey, did you
know about this?

I know you knew about
this 'cause it was hung

at eye level and I know
Quinn couldn't reach up

that high to put it there.
Whoa, whoa.

Remember when I told you
that if you come at me

with the crazy right off the bat
that my head goes all empty

and I can't really have
a productive conversation?

This isn't crazy,
this is mad, this is hurt.

This isn't a big deal.
Not a big deal?

I'm gonna have to watch my
fiancé dance in front of

the entire school with his
ex-girlfriend at my senior prom.

If you haven't noticed,
Quinn can't dance.

She just about died
coming to our wedding.

She asked me if I would
campaign with her,

and I figured it was the least
I could do for our friend.

I can't believe
how selfish you're being.

Yeah, well,
if you haven't noticed,

I'm kind of having
a bad week myself.

I can't believe that my entire
high school career is gonna end

the exact same way it started...
just some sad little Jewish girl

watching you get
all the attention

with the pretty blonde cheerleader.

Come on.

Good, good, good.
Come on.

All right, now let go
of your hands.

You got this.
Just-just let go.

I promise you'll be okay.

You got it.


Come on.

This is all you.
Look at you.

You have it.


Are you okay?

Yeah, I'm okay.
I knew you could do it.

That was fantastic.

You're amazing.

Thank you for always
coming with me.

Totally selfish.

I get to hang with you.

Take a break, then
let's show everyone.

Glee and...

No, no.

Why? This is huge.

Because it has to be real.

I mean...

you know, maybe if
I practiced a lot,

I could walk
into the choir room.

Or even prom.

So until then,

just promise me
you won't tell anybody.

You're gonna be
dancing at prom.

I know it.

I, Becky Faye Jackson,

was born to be Queen,
but my crown has been stolen.

Queens don't always have to
look the same, you know.

Sometimes they look different.

Sometimes they're shorter.

Or wear glasses.

What are you smiling about,

And stop staring at me!

It's not fun to be stared at.

Becky, I understand
you're upset,

but this scorched earth reign
of terror must come to an end.

First, you declared
war on xylophones.

Then, you ransacked
the cafeteria line.

But, Coach,
I want to be Prom Queen,

just like I just saw
in that commercial.

Oh, Becky, commercials
aren't real life.

Advertisers are
manipulative alcoholics

who use images to
play on our emotions.

Haven't you
seen Mad Men?


Neither have I.

Becky, let's
be realistic:

You just didn't have the votes.

For starters, your posters
sent a bit of a mixed message.

But my paintbrush doesn't
have spell check, Coach.

And second... and I mean this
as a compliment...

you're a bitch, Becky.

With a bad attitude.

And honestly,

with Quinn Fabray
in a wheelchair,

the sympathy vote was split.

But here's the

You're coming to prom with me,
Becky Jackson,

where I'm making you
deputy in charge

of guarding the
punch bowl.

Chin up, Jackson.

And please be
careful walking

past my brand-new

That's the attitude
right there, Becky.

♪ The smell of your skin ♪

♪ Lingers on me now ♪

♪ You're probably
on your flight ♪

♪ Back to your hometown ♪

♪ I need some shelter ♪

♪ Of my own protection, baby ♪

♪ Be with myself and center ♪

♪ Clarity, peace, serenity ♪

♪ I hope you know ♪

♪ I hope you know ♪

♪ That this has nothing
to do with you ♪

♪ It's personal, myself and I ♪

♪ We've got some
straightening out to do ♪

♪ And I'm gonna miss you ♪

♪ Like a child
misses their blanket ♪

♪ But I've got to get
a move on with my life ♪

♪ It's time to be
a big girl now ♪

♪ And big girls don't cry ♪

♪ But it's time
for me to go home ♪

♪ It's getting late
and dark outside ♪

♪ I need to be with myself
and center ♪

♪ Clarity, peace,
serenity, yeah ♪

♪ I hope you know ♪

♪ I hope you know ♪

♪ That this has nothing
to do with you ♪

♪ It's personal,
myself and I ♪

♪ We've got some
straightening out to do ♪

♪ And I'm gonna miss you ♪

♪ Like a child
misses their blanket ♪

♪ But I've got to get
a move on with my life ♪

♪ It's time to be
a big girl now ♪

♪ And big girls don't cry. ♪

Rehearsing for prom?

'Cause I love that song,

but it's sort of a downer,
don't you think?

It's just how I'm feeling
right now, okay?

I don't want to watch
Finn and Quinn

get crowned the king
and queen at my prom.

I don't want to watch him
dance with her.

I-I know that
she can't

really dance anymore, but...

I'm sorry. You know...
you know what I mean.

She's right.

Prom sucks.

I don't want to go, either.
Well, you have to go.

You're the reigning prom queen.

You have to crown the next one.

As much as I love
a good coronation,

I can't risk it.

With this school's

strong and
insane tradition

of write-in ballots,
I could get

elected prom queen
again, all right?

And I know I put on

a brave face last year,
but it was humiliating.

And, had I known, I would have
worn a full kilt, so...

How do you
think I feel

with Brittany's
insane ban on hair gel?

It's prom. There's going to be
balloons all over the place,

not to mention the taffeta
and the silk blends.

The sheer amount
of static electricity

in that room
is going to be terrifying.

It's crazy.
You've never seen my hair

without gel...
it's-it's baby-hair fine.

No, it... I'm going
to look like Medusa.

It's not funny.
I don't want to go.

Well, if we're
all going to be

so miserable about it,
who says we have to go?

You're right, Kurt.

But I have a better idea.

So Kurt and Blaine
and I are throwing

an anti-prom party.

What's an anti-prom party?

It's a party
for those of us

who maybe feel a
little, you know,

disenfranchised by
the actual prom.

And I got us a hotel room
at Lima's best hotel,

Red Rooster Express Suite,
and everyone's invited.

You're supporting this?

I'm supporting her,

and I'll be there

as soon as I'm done
fulfilling my...


The mood
will be celebratory,

the food will
be catered,

the libations
will be plentiful,

and the dress code
will be creative black tie.

optional, optional.

And keeping up with
the anti-prom theme,

everyone is welcome,
and unlike the actual prom,

which ends at 11:00 p.m.,

ours goes until the wee hours
of the night.

It's where the fun's at,
you guys.

Okay, how is everyone welcome
when this is clearly

just a party for you and
the two gay Winklevii twins?

Santana, we've invited

most of McKinley's

I wanted to invite you
to our anti-prom party.

Who's going?
Me, Kurt...

Boring. Who else?

Well, we just came up
with the idea.

I'll think about it.

- I'm in.
- But what about

your tradition of trying

to spike Coach Sylvester's
punch bowl?

I almost lost
my teeth

for it last time.
It's impossible.

Plus it's a bummer,
always failing... at everything.

Can we just talk
about what this really is?

Rachel Berry
isn't getting her way,

so she's punishing
the rest of us.

Santana, that's not
the case at all.

Stop acting like you're fine

and start dealing
with your crap.

Look, you choked
at your big audition.

I get it.

I'm sorry, but it happens.

And I understand that you're
pissed off at the universe,

but imploding on one
of the last nights

that we have
to spend together

because, basically, you're just
not in the mood to dance

is maybe the pettiest thing
you have ever done.

So have fun at your
"I'm a victim" party,

acting like you're not
some selfish, self-centered,

lame-ass wannabe diva from hell,

because me, I'm going to go
to my senior prom

with my girlfriend
and my friends.

You can't be too pleased
by that stunt Rachel's pulling.

I'm not, but I kind of
feel bad for her.

She's going through a
lot of rough stuff.

Rough stuff?

Did you forget that
you're talking

to a girl in
a wheelchair?

Yeah, looks good.

We've come
full circle.

Yeah, just like old times.

Though, to be clear,
there will be no

activity this time.

I'm going to Yale, and there
are no tire store majors there.

Well, neither are there
at the Actors Studio,

where I'm applying.

Oh, my God.

Quinn Fabray...

you're so brave
to be doing this.

Thank you.

The atrophy in my leg
is a constant reminder

of the slow, withering remnants
of my past life.

The toll can, at
times, be physically

and emotionally hard,

knowing that I may
never walk again.

People like you
inspire me.

Your healthy, normal
legs are beautiful.

You deserve this.

You've got my vote.

Wow, that was super creepy.

It won't be when we're standing

up on that stage
soaking up the applause.

Don't you feel kind of weird
using your injury

to get the sympathy vote
like that?

Votes are votes, Finn.

Do you want to win or not?

This is awesome.

I actually really
love dinosaurs.



♪ D-I-N-O-S-A ♪

♪ U-R a dinosaur ♪

♪ D-I-N-O-S-A ♪

♪ U-R a dinosaur ♪

♪ An O-L-D M-A-N ♪

♪ You're just an old man ♪

♪ Hitting on me, what? ♪

♪ You need a CAT scan ♪

♪ Yeah, you're pretty old ♪

♪ Not long till you're
a senior citizen ♪

♪ And you can strut around
with that sexy tank of oxygen ♪

♪ Honey, your toupee
is falling to your left side ♪

♪ Get up and go, bro ♪

♪ Oh, wait,
you're fossilized, ha ♪

♪ You sit down,
buy me a martini ♪

♪ Won't go away,
my hips aren't sinking ♪

♪ You say ♪
♪ "Hey, wanna come with me?" ♪

♪ I'm about to barf, seriously ♪

♪ D-I-N-O-S-A ♪

♪ U-R a dinosaur ♪

♪ D-I-N-O-S-A ♪

♪ U-R a dinosaur ♪

♪ An O-L-D M-A-N ♪

♪ You're just an old man ♪

♪ Hitting on me, what? ♪

♪ You need a CAT scan ♪

♪ Hey, dinosaur ♪

♪ Baby, you're prehistoric ♪

♪ Hey, dinosaur ♪

♪ That's what you are, ha ♪

♪ Hey, carnivore ♪

♪ You want my meat, I know it ♪

♪ Hey, dinosaur ♪

♪ That's what you are, ha... ♪

Hudson Hog,

take a deep, meaningful drink

of Sue Sylvester's
Special Prombrosia.

I don't know if it's the
sentimental fetus in me talking,

but I think it's
my best batch ever.

Nothing but Fruit Juicy Red,

Manhattan Seltzer
and seven tablespoons

of Visine,

just so we get out
of here on time.

Uh, have you seen Quinn?

I-I want to make
sure that I can, uh,

get her and her wheelchair
up on stage when she wins.

Well, she had a couple
of cups of punch earlier,

so I'd probably start
with the little girls' room.

♪ D-I-N-O-S-A ♪

♪ U-R a dinosaur ♪

♪ D-I-N-O-S-A ♪

♪ That's what you are, ha. ♪


Hey, Quinn, Quinn, you in here?

You... you can walk?


Isn't it amazing?

You're seeing me
take my first steps.

So you-you... you lied to us.

To everybody.

No, I mean, my legs
are getting better,

but I wanted it
to be a surprise.

You know, for when
I walk up there

and... and get my crown.

The crowd will go wild.

I really want this.

You may want this,

but Rachel needs me,
and... and I picked

you over her.

Do you know how stupid
that makes me feel?

You have everything.

You're going to have your crown.

You're going
to go to Yale.

Rachel has
none of that.

And tonight, thanks to you,

she doesn't even have me.
We're a shoo-in.

I need you.

No, you don't need me, okay?

I-I-I thought

going through all
that terrible stuff

this year made you cooler,

but no, you're still
the same old Quinn.

All that matters is you.
Come on, stop!


Look, it's mandatory
for the nominees

to have at least one
dance together.

I know you don't understand

how much this means
to me, but...

... will you please
just stay here for me?


Oh, my God.
All right.

Let the very first annual
McKinley High Anti-Prom begin.

Oh, look, there's
chocolates on the pillows.

We got room service.

Minibar! Whoo!


So, uh, what
should we do now?

Duh... play strip poker.

I brought condoms.

Becky, Blaine and I
are gay, remember?

Never stopped me before.

Well, I mean, no matter what,
it'll be better than prom.

Yeah! Who wants to be in
that smelly old gym, anyway?

Prom's a sucker's

Prom sucks!
Let's get wasted! Whoo!

Becky, Becky, we appreciate
your enthusiasm,

but will you just keep it down
with the shouting?

Keep your big honking nose out
of it, Berry!

Oh, snap! Oh snap!

So, I wouldn't mind

watching a little TV.

Um, maybe some Bravo?

Dude, it's a hotel.
It's gotta be Skinemax.

We could put on a fashion show!

Yeah! Let's go all
Sound of Music

and make some old-timey couture

out of the drapes and bedsheets, huh?
Too gay!

I second that.

Well, I'd love

to show you guys my prom dress.

I wouldn't want it
to go completely to waste.

It's in my car.
I can go get it.

Worst anti-prom ever!

♪ It's been said and done ♪

♪ Every beautiful thought's
been already sung ♪

♪ And I guess right now here's
another one ♪

♪ So your melody will
play on and on ♪

♪ With the best of 'em ♪

First time we
danced together

like this was at
last year's prom.

I remember.

And remember when
I told you we were

gonna get back together

and you told me
I was crazy? Crazy.

That's 'cause you are.

Yeah, but you kind
of love it.

♪ And I want you to know, baby ♪

♪ I, I love you
like a love song, baby ♪

♪ I, I love you like a love
song, baby ♪

Looks like everyone's happy

♪ I, I love you
like a love song, baby ♪

♪ And I keep hitting repeat-
peat, peat, peat, peat, peat ♪

♪ I, I love you like
a love song, baby ♪

♪ I, I love you like a love
song, baby ♪

♪ I, I love you
like a long song, baby ♪

♪ And I keep hitting repeat-
peat, peat, peat, peat, peat ♪

♪ Constantly, girl, you play ♪

♪ Through my mind
like a symphony ♪

♪ There's no way to describe
what you do to me ♪

♪ You just do me ♪

♪ What you do ♪

♪ And it feels like I've been rescued ♪
♪ Rescued ♪

♪ I've been set free ♪
♪ Set free ♪

♪ I am hypnotized by destiny ♪
♪ Destiny ♪

♪ You are magical, lyrical,
beautiful ♪

♪ You are, and I want
you to know, baby ♪

♪ I, I love you
like a love song, baby ♪

Just one dance.
Come and finish it with me?

Yeah, I will...
as soon as you stand up

and show everybody how much
you deserve this,

how much you deserve
to be Prom Queen

Are you really doing
this right now?

What, making you walk?

Make you stand up and show
everybody how much of

a crazy liar you are? Yeah.

Come on. Stand up!
What's going on, dude?

Did you know that she could walk, too?
You must have

with all that physical therapy
you've been giving.

Hey, just finish the dance
with me!

Stand the hell up!
Come on!

What is wrong
with you?!

Hey, hey, hey!
You forcing me

to eject you from
yet another prom, Hudson?

Not this time, Coach.

Good idea, Frumps.

What are you looking at,
Jar-Jar Binks?

Touch those peanut M&M's,
and I will end you.

This is a repeat.
It's the one with

the passive-aggressive lesbian
and the doggy care.

I wish Tabatha would
take over this anti-prom.

Gosh, this sucks.

Yeah, well...

If you wanted to go
to the prom,

I would have gone
with you.

I am not going

to give into Brittany's
insane ban on hair gel.

Freedom to use hair care

It's in the Bill of Rights.

Didn't the founding
fathers all wear wigs?

You haven't seen me

without an enormous amount
of gel in my hair.

It's, it's really bad.


the room service is here.
I want my shrimp cocktail!

Hey, Becky.

Where's Rachel?

She's been in the bathroom
for 45 minutes.

I'm guessing the runs.

All right, let's let

the anti-prom fashion
extravaganza begin.


What are you doing here?

Well, I'll keep it simple.

I love you. You're beautiful.

Prom sucks without you.

Prom sucks without
all of you, guys.

This is the last t time

we're gonna get to be together
like this.

I want to dance with my
fiancé, dance with my friends.

Well, I'll just pretend
to be an iceculpture

if Brittany sees me,
and then she'll just pass me by.

So, you guys gonna come?

Not until I get
my shrimp cocktail.

I'm good.
And you guys go ahead.

Come on, dude.
You're my wingman.

I'll go next year.


Are you ready for strip poker,

Socks count as one item.

I'm so glad you guys came.

Better late than never, right?

Come on.
Let's dance.

♪ You're insecure,
don't know what for ♪

No, sorry, Blaine.

I said no hair gel,

I can totally smell it.

Let's go!

You can do this.

♪ The way that you are
is enough ♪

♪ Everyone else in the room
can see it ♪

♪ Everyone else but you ♪

♪ Baby, you light up my world
like nobody else ♪

♪ The way that you flip
your hair gets me overwhelmed ♪

♪ But when you smile at the
ground it ain't hard to tell ♪

♪ You don't know, oh-oh ♪

♪ You don't know you're
beautiful ♪

♪ If only you saw
what I can see ♪

♪ You'll understand why
I want you so desperately ♪

♪ Right now I'm looking
at you ♪

♪ And I can't believe
you don't know, oh-oh ♪

♪ You don't know
you're beautiful, oh-oh ♪

♪ That's what makes you
beautiful ♪

♪ Na, na-na-na, na-na-na,
na, na ♪

♪ Na, na-na-na,
na-na-na, na, na ♪

♪ Na, na-na-na, na-na-na,
na, na ♪

♪ Na, na-na-na, na-na ♪

♪ Baby, you light up my world
like nobody else ♪

♪ The way that you flip
your hair gets me overwhelmed ♪

♪ But when you smile at the
ground it ain't hard to tell ♪

♪ You don't know
you're beautiful ♪

♪ You light up my world
like nobody else ♪

♪ The way you flip your hair
gets me overwhelmed ♪

♪ But when you smile at the
ground, it ain't hard to tell ♪

♪ You don't know, oh-oh, you
don't know you're beautiful ♪

♪ If only you saw
what I can see ♪

♪ You'll understand why
I want you so desperately ♪

♪ Right now I'm looking
at you and I can't believe ♪

♪ You don't know, oh-oh ♪

♪ You don't know
you're beautiful, oh-oh ♪

♪ You don't know you're
beautiful, oh-oh ♪

♪ That's what
makes you beautiful. ♪

Suck on these, Puckerman.

Trip aces.

I'm getting sharked.

Where'd you learn to play?

In the joint.

Well, I'm one losing
hand away

from an extremely
awkward situation,

so would you mind laying
off a little bit?

I can't. I'm too pissed off.

'Cause I didn't get nominated
for prom queen

like that girl in
the commercial.

Coach Sue said
I couldn't get the votes.

You really wanted that crown,

More than anything.

It hurts, Puck.

Becky Jackson...

I'm putting some clothes on
'cause I have an idea.


Yeah, check it out.

We still haven't crowned a king

and queen for
the anti-prom, have we?

No, we haven't.

I'm gonna bust out my knife.

If you ask me, I think

the anti-prom's
the most important prom of all.

First, we need a king.


And then now,
we need a queen. Hmm...

I hope I get it.

Becky Jackson...

I crown you the Queen
of the anti-prom.

Take a look.

Oh, my gosh!

I did it.

I'm so happy.

Your Highness,
what do you say we get out of here?


My prince.

Hey, I got your text.

You have three

The voting has started,
and I need

to get out there
and press the flesh.

Look, I owe you
an apology.

I-I found out
that you and Finn

were campaigning

and I kind of
freaked out.

I got really jealous
and irrational,

I just, I should have
been supportive.

Well, since I had no idea
that was going on,

it's pretty easy
to forgive you.

So I'm glad we cleared
this up.

Do you not understand

what you mean to me?

When we first met,

you were everything
I wanted to be:

You were beautiful
and popular,

and you had Finn.

How the mighty have fallen.

No, you don't understand.

I still see you
the same way, okay?

That's why I got so crazy.

Because I wasn't seeing
the new Quinn.

The still-beautiful,

but humbled
and inspiring Quinn.

I, I've lost so much
over these past few weeks.

And I honestly
don't know

what the hell I'm gonna do
to do with my life.

But when I look back
on my high school career

the one thing, the one
accomplishment that I'm gonna be

so proud of is that I found
a way to be your friend.

So I'm apologizing
to my friend.

And I also want you
to know that

I voted for you
for Prom Queen.

And I really think you
deserve it.

Stop making out
with Berry and

get to the
Spanish room, Quinn.

It's time to count the votes
and declare me the winner.


Bye. Good luck.

Drop that ladle,

Ooh, I'm onto you, lady.

You're trying to
spike my punch!

No, I'm not.
I'm just thirsty.

I'm dehydrated from
all the crying.

Yeah, right.

That dress is hideous.

Becky Faye Jackson,
you've done it!

You're at senior prom with
a crown on your head,

and a hot piece of booty
on your arm.

And for once in my life,

I don't mind everybody
staring at me.

Game on, beautiful.

Born for this, Puckerman.

Becky, I don't care which dope
we crown here tonight,

you are truly the queen
of this joint.

Thanks, Coach!

Oh, my God!

Is that a sniper
in the rafters?

Oh, I knew I should've
done another security sweep.

I don't see anything.

Use your infrared
glasses, Coach.

Good idea, Becky.

I don't see anything.

Dance with me, Puckerman?

Thank you for making my dream
come true, my queen.

My count for king
is the same as yours.

I don't get it.

How could Brittany have only
gotten four votes?

This Dino Prom theme
was a smash.

Well, maybe it has something
to do with the fact

that she's a girl.

Well, screw this.

I don't want to be queen
if Britt isn't king.

Well, good, because my count for
queen was the same as yours.

I won by one vote.

I won.

It's everything I've ever wanted

and I don't feel any different.


I mean, I guess
you deserve to win, right?

What with being a crip and all.

You know, we really have had
the dream high school careers.

doing whatever we wanted.

Whoever we wanted.

You know, I'm really
not surprised

that you and I were
the top two candidates.


Well, you know, it would be
boring if we weren't so awesome.

Don't you want to leave this
place having made a difference?

Oh, my dear God.

Don't make fun of
the new kid

with the bad 'fro.
It's hair-bullying.

That's not a new kid.
That's Blaine without hair gel.

Is it really
that bad?

Yeah, you're Mr. Broccoli Head.
It's not that bad.

Yeah, it is.
It's really bad.

And you made your point.

I abuse my power as president...
but to help save the prom,

and to keep people from turning
to stone when they look at you,

I'll give you special permission
to wear hair gel, immediately.

Quiet, please, children.

I'll be right back.

Thank you, thank you.

Don't you dare.

I love finally getting
to see the real you.

The man without
the product.

And I want everyone here to
know just how proud I am

of my brave, handsome,
bushy-haired boyfriend.

Come on, Barrette.

First I have
an announcement to make:

There are reptiles living in
McKinley toilets no more.

The family of snakes has been
safely removed to the zoo,

and they can life out their
lives in the toilets there.

And now, this year's Prom Court:

Nominees for
the Prom King are:

Finn Hudson...

Rick "The Stick" Nelson...

I love you, man!

And President
Brittany S. Pierce.

The nominees
for Prom Queen:

Missy Gunderson...

Santana Lopez...

(applause, whoopin

... and Miss Quinn Fabray.

I would like to invite
last year's queen,

sassy male student Kurt Hummel,

to crown this year's winners.


this year's Prom King is...


Mr. Finn Hudson.

Go, Finn!

And the winner
for Prom Queen is...

Students, for the second year
in a row, we have prom anarchy.

Receiving the majority of
write-in votes,

I would like to welcome
on the stage...

Miss Rachel Berry.

Smile and breathe.

McKinley Titans,
bow down to your new leaders!

And now...

first dance of this year's
Senior King and Queen!

♪ Watching every motion
in my foolish lover's game... ♪

Is this some kind of
joke or something?

I mean,
like Kurt last year,

is someone going to
throw pig's blood on me next,

like in Carrie?

Look at me.

You're sexy,
you're beautiful,

you're an inspiration to every
single person in this room,

just like you are to me.

From where you began,
to where you are now...

... you're amazing.

♪ Watching in slow-motion
as you turn around and say ♪

♪ You take my breath away ♪

♪ Take my breath away ♪

Hey, are you
really crying?

I just... don't want
it to end.

Prom night?


This whole year.

I just wish it could
go on forever.

♪ You take my breath away ♪

♪ Watching every motion
in this foolish lover's game ♪

♪ Haunted by the notion ♪

♪ Somewhere there's
a love in flames... ♪


It's a prom miracle.

♪ Turning and returning
to some secret place inside... ♪

♪ Watching in slow-motion
as you turn my way ♪

♪ And say ♪

♪ You take my breath away ♪

♪ My love ♪

♪ Take my breath away, oh... ♪

♪ Away ♪

♪ Take my breath away... ♪

Never in a million years
would I have thought

that someone like me would
win Prom Queen.

But if my friends believe in me enough
to see me this way, then...

I don't know,
maybe anything's possible.

♪ Away ♪

♪ Take my breath away ♪

♪ My love ♪

♪ Take my breath away... ♪