Gilmore Girls (2000–2007): Season 5, Episode 1 - Say Goodbye to Daisy Miller - full transcript

I LOVE YOU, RORY.

I LOVE YOU, TOO, DEAN.

ARE YOU COMFORTABLE?

AM I KILLING YOUR ARM?

MY ARM IS FINE. I COULD MOVE.

DON'T YOU DARE MOVE.

THIS, RIGHT HERE, IS

THE TEXTBOOK DEFINITION
OF A PERFECT MOMENT.

YEAH, IT IS.

AND EARLIER?

THAT WAS PRETTY PERFECT, TOO.

HOWEVER, AS A GUY, I WAS
TRYING NOT TO BE A PIG.

I'M HAPPY. ARE YOU HAPPY?

I'M VERY HAPPY.

HAPPY BUT NOT CHATTY?

I'M JUST

TRYING TO MAKE SURE THAT
ALL THIS IS REALLY HAPPENING.

IT IS.

HEY, YOU KNOW
WHAT I THINK WE NEED?

WHAT?

A SONG. LIKE, A SONG
THAT'S OUR SONG.

OK.

SOMETHING ROMANTIC,
BUT NOT MUSHY.

SOMETHING THAT'LL
MAKE US REMEMBER THIS.

UH, BELIEVE ME, I'M
REMEMBERING THIS.

OH, I KNOW.

OK, PERFECT.

SO, FROM NOW ON

NO MATTER WHAT YOU'RE
DOING, WHERE YOU ARE,

YOU WILL STOP AND THINK
OF ME WHEN YOU HEAR THIS.

♪

THAT'S NOT GONNA BE OUR SONG!

WHY NOT? IT'S PERFECT.

IT'S HAPPY. IT'S HOPEFUL.

IT HAS THE WORD "CANDY" IN IT.

HEY, WHAT IS MORE
HOT THAN CANDY?

PICK SOMETHING ELSE.

♪ WHO CAN TAKE A SUNRISE ♪

♪ WHO CAN TAKE A SUNRISE ♪

OK, OK, OK, OK, I'LL
PICK SOMETHING ELSE.

NO.

HAND IT OVER. I CAN'T
TAKE IT ANYMORE.

THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN
THE WOMEN GET THE REMOTE.

♪ OOH, THE CANDYMAN CAN ♪

WHAT WAS THAT?

WHAT?

RORY!

HEY, WHAT'S GOING ON?

DEAN CAME OVER TO
BORROW SOMETHING.

YEAH.

THANKS.

YOU'RE WELCOME.

WELL, UH, I SHOULD GO.

BYE, LORELAI.

BYE, DEAN.

WHAT... WHAT DID HE BORROW?

I'M SORRY I DIDN'T TALK
TO YOU ABOUT IT FIRST.

I... I KNOW I PROMISED I WOULD

BUT I SWEAR I DIDN'T KNOW THAT...
THAT THIS WAS GOING TO HAPPEN.

I MEAN, I DIDN'T KNOW HE
WAS GONNA SHOW UP TONIGHT

AND IT JUST HAPPENED.

IT'S AWFUL FOR YOU TO
FIND OUT LIKE THIS, I KNOW,

BUT EVERYTHING'S OK. I'M OK,
AND WE WERE, YOU KNOW, SAFE

SO ALL THOSE TROJAN MAN JOKES ALL
THESE YEARS REALLY APPARENTLY STUCK.

AND I'M LUCKY, TOO,
BECAUSE DEAN, HE'S...

WELL, AREN'T YOU GLAD THAT IT
HAPPENED WITH SOMEONE WHO'S GOOD

AND... AND REALLY LOVES ME?

HE'S MARRIED.

YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
THE SITUATION.

IS HE STILL MARRIED? YES, BUT...

THEN, I UNDERSTAND
THE SITUATION.

I JUST WANT WHAT'S
BEST FOR YOU. THAT'S ALL.

YOU'RE JUST MAD BECAUSE I
DIDN'T COME RUNNING TO YOU

TO DISCUSS WHETHER OR
NOT I WAS READY FOR THIS STEP.

I DECIDED IT ON MY OWN.

OBVIOUSLY YOU WEREN'T
READY FOR THIS STEP.

HELLO? HELLO?

HELLO?

HEY.

LET'S JUST TALK.

NO.

♪ IF YOU'RE OUT ON THE ROAD ♪

♪ FEELING LONELY, AND SO COLD ♪

♪ ALL YOU HAVE TO
DO IS CALL MY NAME ♪

♪ AND I'LL BE THERE
ON THE NEXT TRAIN ♪

♪ WHERE YOU LEAD,
I WILL FOLLOW ♪

♪ ANYWHERE THAT YOU TELL ME TO ♪

♪ IF YOU NEED, YOU
NEED ME TO BE WITH YOU ♪

♪ I WILL FOLLOW, OH ♪

♪ WHERE YOU LEAD,
I WILL FOLLOW ♪

♪ ANYWHERE THAT YOU TELL ME TO ♪

♪ IF YOU NEED, YOU
NEED ME TO BE WITH YOU ♪

♪ I WILL FOLLOW WHERE YOU LEAD ♪

YOU DO REALIZE YOU JUST
LEAPT OUT OF A MOVING VEHICLE.

EVERYTHING CANNOT BE
ON YOUR SCHEDULE, RICHARD.

NOW, WHERE IS IT? I
KNOW I PUT IT IN HERE. AH.

IN ALL THE YEARS
WE'VE BEEN TOGETHER,

I HAVE NEVER SEEN YOU
BEHAVE AS IRRATIONALLY AS...

EMILY, I'M TALKING TO
YOU! WILL YOU STOP?

EMILY, THIS FEUD OF OURS HAS
NOW REACHED COMICAL HEIGHTS

THAT CHARLIE CHAPLIN HIMSELF
WOULD FIND HILARIOUS, AND HE'S DEAD.

DON'T FOLLOW ME, RICHARD.

OH, WAIT, COME BACK.

LET ME GET YOU A
CANE AND A DERBY.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

I'M LOOKING FOR MY
EUROPEAN LUGGAGE

WHICH SOME IMBECILE HAS
CHOSEN TO HIDE FROM ME.

WHAT DO YOU NEED YOUR
EUROPEAN LUGGAGE FOR?

TO PUT THINGS IN.

WELL, YOU'RE MAKING A MESS.

I DON'T CARE IF
I'M MAKING A MESS.

WHO'S GOING TO
CLEAN ALL THIS UP, YOU?

YES, ME, OR THE MAID

OR PERHAPS PENNILYN
LOTT CAN COME BY

AFTER ONE OF YOUR
CLANDESTINE LUNCHEONS

AND TAKE A STAB AT IT.

OH, FOR HEAVEN'S
SAKE, NOT THAT AGAIN.

SHE'S JUST A FRIEND.

I AM GOING TO EUROPE, RICHARD.

I'M GOING TO EUROPE AND I'M
GOING TO HAVE A MARVELOUS TIME.

I'M GOING TO GET UP AT 10:00

AND I'M GOING TO HAVE 2 GLASSES
OF WINE AT LUNCH EVERY SINGLE DAY.

ONLY PROSTITUTES HAVE 2
GLASSES OF WINE AT LUNCH.

WELL, THEN BUY ME A
BOA AND DRIVE ME TO RENO

BECAUSE I AM OPEN FOR BUSINESS.

I... I CAN'T TALK TO YOU WHEN
YOU'RE LIKE THIS. I'M GOING TO BED.

YOU GO TO BED.
I'LL GO TO FRANCE.

♪

RICHARD!

RICHARD!

THE DOOR IS STUCK. RICHARD!

♪

THIS ISN'T FUNNY!

RICHARD? RICHARD!

EMILY?

YOU LOCKED ME IN.

I DID NOT LOCK YOU IN.

YOU CERTAINLY DID LOCK ME IN.

THE DOOR MUST BE JAMMED.

DID YOU TRY JIGGLING THE KNOB?

I SUPPOSE I COULD DO
THAT, OR YOU COULD JUST

GET THE HELL DOWN
HERE AND LET ME OUT!

GIVE ME A MOMENT, PLEASE.

IF YOU DON'T COME DOWN HERE RIGHT
NOW, I WILL CLIMB OUT THE WINDOW.

YOU WILL NOT CLIMB
OUT THE WINDOW.

I WILL. I WILL CLIMB OUT
THE WINDOW RIGHT NOW.

DON'T YOU DARE.

I'M DOING IT. I'M CLIMBING
OUT THE WINDOW.

YOU BETTER NOT
CLIMB OUT THE WINDOW.

DAMN IT.

EMILY GILMORE,

I BETTER NOT CATCH YOU
CLIMBING OUT THE WINDOW.

I'M OUT THE WINDOW.
I'M OUT THE WINDOW.

GET DOWN FROM THERE.

NO!

EMILY, GET BACK HERE.

EMILY!

ARE YOU HAVING AN
ANEURYSM OR SOMETHING?

GET INSIDE AND PUT THIS ON.

GET AWAY FROM ME!

DO YOU SERIOUSLY THINK THAT
AFTER 39 YEARS OF MARRIAGE,

I WOULD RESORT TO
LOCKING YOU IN A BASEMENT?

I DON'T KNOW WHAT
YOU'D RESORT TO.

I DON'T KNOW WHO YOU ARE AT ALL.

I KNEW THE MENTAL
ILLNESS IN YOUR FAMILY

WOULD CATCH UP
WITH YOU EVENTUALLY.

AUNT CORA WAS NOT MENTALLY ILL.

SHE WAS ATHLETIC!

OH, FINE.

IS THERE SOME SORT OF
PROBLEM HERE, FOLKS?

NO. THERE'S NO PROBLEM.

WE GOT A CALL FROM SOME OF YOUR
NEIGHBORS COMPLAINING ABOUT A DISTURBANCE.

WE APOLOGIZE. WE'RE
GOING INSIDE RIGHT NOW.

DO NOT TELL ME WHAT TO DO.

CAN WE HAVE YOUR
SECURITY PASSWORD, PLEASE?

LOOK, IT'S GETTING LATE, SO
EITHER SHOOT US OR GO AWAY.

FINE. WE'LL JUST WRITE UP A
REPORT HERE AND BE ON OUR WAY.

OH. ARE YOU HAPPY, RICHARD?

NOW THERE'S A REPORT.

AND A REPORT MEANS WE'LL
BE IN THE POLICE BLOTTER.

PETAL HUFFINGTON READS THE
POLICE BLOTTER RELIGIOUSLY.

IT'S LIKE HEROIN TO HER.

YOU'VE TURNED US INTO THE
SCANDAL OF THE NEIGHBORHOOD.

DO YOU KNOW WHAT, EMILY?

IF NOTHING ELSE, THIS DISPLAY
TONIGHT DEMONSTRATES CLEARLY

THAT YOU ARE NO LONGER
THE WOMAN I MARRIED.

THE WOMAN YOU MARRIED
WAS YOUR PARTNER.

YOU LISTENED TO HER. YOU CONSULTED
WITH HER. YOU RESPECTED HER.

SO, YOU ARE RIGHT, RICHARD. I AM
DEFINITELY NOT THE WOMAN YOU MARRIED.

OH, NO. IT'S OK.

WHAT HAPPENED?

HE LANDED BUTT FIRST
IN TAYLOR'S ROSE BUSHES.

OH, POOR THING.

YEAH. DIDN'T SLOW HIM DOWN,
THOUGH. I MANAGED TO TACKLE HIM

AS HE HEADED TOWARD
THE MINIATURE GOAT PEN

DRAGGED HIM BACK HERE

THREW ONE OF YOUR BLANKETS
OVER HIM, AND, WELL, THERE HE IS.

HE'S GONNA BE FINE.

WELL, THAT'S GOOD. YEAH.

SO, YOU WERE GONE FOR A WHILE.

HUH? YEAH, WELL, I JUST HAD SOME
THINGS TO TAKE CARE OF AT HOME.

ARE YOU SURE HE CAN BREATHE?

OH, YEAH, I PROPPED
HIS HEAD UP. SO, UH...

YOU OK?

YES, I'M FINE.

YEAH, OK, JUST...

NOTHING YOU WANT TO TALK
ABOUT WITH... WITH... WITH ME...

OH!

OH, MY GOD, WE NEED
TO TAKE HIM UPSTAIRS.

LULU CAN'T SEE ME LIKE THIS.

BUT, KIRK... LULU
CAN'T SEE ME LIKE THIS!

OK, SHE WON'T. I PROMISE.

CAN I TAKE A LOOK?

OK.

I DON'T WANT TO TAKE A LOOK.

WELL, I'M NOT LOOKING.

HEY! IT'S A PARTY.

WHAT'S EVERYBODY DOING UP?

OH, HEY, GOOD TIMING, SQUIGGY.

I WAS JUST GOING TO
CHECK ON MY LOAVES

AND MAKE SURE THEY'RE
RISING PROPERLY.

THE AIR'S A LITTLE MORE HUMID
THAN I THOUGHT IT WAS GOING TO BE,

AND IF THE LOAVES AREN'T
RISING PROPERLY, THEN...

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

I NEED YOU TO
LOOK AT KIRK'S BUTT.

WHY? WELL, BECAUSE HE
RAN INTO SOME ROSE BUSHES

AND HE'S GOT SOME THORNS
STUCK IN IT, AND I THOUGHT OF YOU.

ME? WHY ME?

WELL, BECAUSE YOU'RE A CHEF.

WHAT? AND YOU HAVE A KID.

YES, THAT'S BETTER.
YOU HAVE A KID.

NEITHER OF US HAS KIDS.

WELL, SH-SHE DOES, BUT IT'S BIG
AND... AND CAN LOOK AT HER OWN BUTT.

I GOT THIS, THANKS. OK.

OH, OK. WELL...

OH, OH.

I'M GONNA NEED BACTINE,
ANTISEPTIC, AND LOTS OF HOT TOWELS.

I'LL GO. I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

HEY, KIRK? HOW ARE YOU FEELING?

IS LUKE HERE?

I'M RIGHT HERE, KIRK.

SORRY I BIT YOU.

IT'S OK, KIRK.

THEY WERE AFTER
ME, SO I RAN AWAY.

WHO WAS AFTER YOU, HONEY?

ASSASSINS. HE THINKS
ASSASSINS ARE AFTER HIM.

THEY WERE UNDER
MY BED IN MY ROOM.

SO I RAN AND THEY FOLLOWED ME
DOWN THE HALL, DOWN THE STAIRS,

PAST LUKE AND LORELAI KISSING,

THROUGH THE YARD,
OVER THAT FENCE.

WELL, THE ASSASSINS
ARE GONE NOW, KIRK.

I IMAGINED THEM?

I THINK SO.

WHAT ABOUT LUKE KISSING LORELAI?

I THINK YOU IMAGINED THAT, TOO.

THEY LOOKED SO REAL.

OK, KIRK, YOU JUST SETTLE DOWN
AND RELAX, AND I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

OH.

OH!

OH, MY GOD! SOOKIE.

YOU KISSED?

YES.

I CAN'T BELIEVE SHE DIDN'T
TELL ME. WHY DIDN'T SHE TELL ME?

IT JUST HAPPENED.

OH, LUKE, THAT'S WONDERFUL!

THANKS.

I CAN'T WAIT TO TELL
LORELAI IT'S WONDERFUL.

UM, COULD YOU MAYBE NOT SAY
ANYTHING FOR A LITTLE WHILE?

WHY?

WELL, I'M JUST NOT SO SURE
SHE WANTS THIS OUT YET.

WHAT MAKES YOU THINK THAT?

DO ME A FAVOR AND
KEEP IT TO YOURSELF.

LET HER TELL YOU
IF SHE WANTS TO, OK?

ALL RIGHT. SURE. OK. CALL ME
BELINDA BECAUSE MY LIPS ARE SEALED.

THANK YOU.

HEY, LUKE? YEAH?

THIS IS GOOD.

I HOPE SO.

HEY.

HEY.

MY MOM BROUGHT BY BROWNIES.

YOU WORKED LATE AGAIN.

YEAH.

DO YOU HAVE TO WORK TOMORROW?

I WORK AT DOOSE'S TOMORROW.

OH.

WELL, WILL YOU BE
HOME FOR DINNER?

BECAUSE I WAS THINKING
OF COOKING OR SOMETHING.

I GUESS.

I'LL TRY. I DON'T KNOW.

YOU WANT A BROWNIE?

NO.

MY MOM PUT GUMMY BEARS IN THEM,

LIKE I'M STILL 3 OR SOMETHING.

OH, YEAH. I FOUND YOUR PHONE.

IT HAD FALLEN IN
THE COUCH CUSHIONS.

THANKS.

IT RANG A LITTLE EARLIER,
ABOUT 20 MINUTES AGO.

I ANSWERED, BUT THEY HUNG UP.

YOU ANSWERED MY PHONE?

WELL, IT KIND OF WOKE ME UP.

WHY ARE YOU ANSWERING
PEOPLE'S PHONES?

DEAN. I MEAN, YOU KNOW
IT'S MY PHONE, LINDSAY.

THIS ISN'T YOUR PHONE.

I MEAN... WHO WAS IT?

I DON'T KNOW. THEY HUNG UP.

SO YOU DIDN'T TAKE A MESSAGE?

I TOLD YOU, THEY HUNG UP.

SO, GREAT, UH, YOU'RE JUST ANSWERING
MY PHONE AND NOT TAKING MESSAGES?

THAT'S GREAT, LINDSAY.

DEAN...

TAYLOR CALLS ON
THIS PHONE, AND TOM.

I MEAN, THIS PHONE IS FOR
BUSINESS, OK? THAT'S WHY I HAVE IT.

FINE. I MEAN, WHAT IF TOM CALLED

AND HE HAD AN EXTRA SHIFT
FOR ME TOMORROW, HUH?

I MEAN, HE CALLS TO
TELL ME, AND YOU ANSWER

AND HE THINKS MAYBE HE DOESN'T
HAVE THE RIGHT NUMBER AND HE HANGS UP

AND THEN I JUST LOSE OUT,
WHICH MEANS WE LOSE OUT.

GOD, LINDSAY! YOU
KNOW, YOU DON'T...

YOU DON'T GET IT, DO YOU?

I MEAN, YOU HAVE ABSOLUTELY
NO RESPECT FOR ME AT ALL.

THAT'S JUST OBVIOUS.

I DON'T WANT TO FIGHT.
WE ALWAYS FIGHT.

I WON'T ANSWER
YOUR PHONE ANYMORE.

I WAS ASLEEP. I DIDN'T THINK.

I'M SORRY, OK?

YEAH.

OK.

YOU COMING TO BED?

IN A MINUTE.

OK.

YOU MAD AT ME?

NO.

JUST TIRED. LONG DAY.

I'LL BE RIGHT THERE.

EVERYTHING LOOKS SO GOOD.

I KNOW IT DOES.

I WANT HALF OF THAT
CRANBERRY SQUARE.

OK.

KIRK, SIT.

I'M GOOD.

YOU CAN'T EAT
STANDING UP LIKE THAT.

MY MOTHER SAYS IT
GIVES YOU CANCER.

REALLY? MINE, TOO.

HEY, LOOK WHO CAME TO VISIT.

OH, MY GOD, THE BABY'S HERE.

HEY, SHORT STUFF.
HOW'S IT HANGIN'?

HE JUST CAME TO SAY HI TO
EVERYBODY AND TO SEE THE PLACE

ON WHICH HIS ENTIRE COLLEGE
EDUCATION DEPENDS. WHAT DO YOU THINK?

IS IT GONNA BE IVY LEAGUE OR IS IT
GONNA BE MURRAY'S HOUSE OF LEARNIN'?

IF WE'RE GOING BY
THE DOUGHNUT DEMAND,

I THINK HE'S IN
PRETTY GOOD SHAPE.

OK, IVY LEAGUE IT IS.

I JUST HOPE YOU'RE
NOT STUPID. YEAH?

WELL, YOU HAVE FUN. MOMMY'S
GOTTA GET BACK TO WORK.

BE NICE, AND DON'T
THROW UP ON THE BUFFET.

THAT'S IT. YOU GET OVER THERE
RIGHT NOW WITH THAT BABY.

COULD YOU SIGN THIS?

MICHEL, HOLD IT
RIGHT THERE. MICHEL?

MICHEL, I HAVE A
COMPLAINT. MICHEL?

MICHEL?

CAN I HELP YOU?

I WAS TALKING TO YOU AND YOU
JUST WALKED AWAY FROM ME.

OH, I'M SORRY, I THOUGHT YOU
WERE CALLING SOMEONE ELSE.

SOMEONE ELSE NAMED MICHEL?

IF ONLY I COULD READ MINDS.

WHAT CAN I DO FOR YOU?

ONE OF MY SHOES IS MISSING,
AND THE OTHER HAS BEEN CHEWED.

IS THIS A RIDDLE? I'M VERY BUSY.

NO, THIS IS NOT A
RIDDLE. THIS IS FACT.

LOOK AT THIS SHOE. THIS SHOE
WAS PRACTICALLY BRAND-NEW

WORN TWICE AND ONLY ON
SMOOTH-SURFACE FLOORS.

I LEAVE IT IN YOUR HALLWAY,
AND IN THE MORNING, I FIND THIS.

OH, MY GOD, WHAT HAVE I DONE?

EXCUSE ME. I'M SORRY.

TAYLOR, WHY DID YOU LEAVE
YOUR SHOE IN THE HALLWAY?

YOUR COMPLIMENTARY SHOESHINE.

OUR...

UH, I DON'T KNOW WHAT
HE'S TALKING ABOUT.

HEY, LORELAI.

OH, NO PROBLEM,
LUKE. BUTT RIGHT IN.

I COULDN'T POSSIBLY BE TALKING
ABOUT ANYTHING IMPORTANT.

GOOD. UH...

AH, I CAN'T...

UH, I JUST... I HAVE TO
GET BACK TO THE DINER.

OK. WELL, UM, I...

I'M STILL STANDING HERE.

I HAVE TO...

UH, SURE.

OK. BUT THANK YOU
SO MUCH FOR COMING.

OK, I'LL... GUESS
I'LL SEE YOU LATER.

YEAH.

YOU THINK I'M
MAKING ALL THIS UP.

NO, I DON'T THINK
YOU'RE MAKING IT UP.

YOU'RE MAKING A SCENE,
IS WHAT YOU'RE MAKING.

ALL RIGHT, FINE.

I'M GOING TO FIND
WHEREVER I READ

THAT YOU SAID YOU
HAVE SHOESHINE SERVICE.

I'M GOING TO SHOW YOU, AND THEN
HE CAN TAKE THAT LOOK OFF HIS FACE.

TAYLOR, SERIOUSLY, I
COMPLETELY BELIEVE YOU.

THAT MAN IS WHY MAIL-ORDER
BRIDES WERE INVENTED.

MMM.

OH, MY, MY. WELL,
WHAT A SURPRISE.

PEOPLE WILL EXPECT ME
TO BE HERE FOR BREAKFAST.

YES, THEY WILL. OK, THEN
I'M HERE FOR BREAKFAST.

ENJOY.

RORY, WE WERE WONDERING
WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU.

I JUST RAN HOME EARLY THIS
MORNING TO GET SOMETHING.

HEY, DAVEY, YOU
CAME FOR BREAKFAST?

YES, HE DID. DIDN'T YOU, DAVEY?

YEAH, HE DID.

OOPS. HE'S GOT THAT
LOOK ON HIS FACE.

UH, YOU MIGHT WANT
TO GIVE HIM BACK TO ME.

OH, PLEASE, IF I WENT
RUNNING EVERY TIME SOME GUY

TRIED TO CRAP ALL OVER ME,

I NEVER WOULD HAVE
GOTTEN MARRIED.

HEY, SOOKIE, WHAT
DID YOU WANT TO TALK...

I'M SO HAPPY!

I'M SO GLAD YOU'RE SO HAPPY!

IS... IS... IS THIS IS A NORMAL HAPPY OR
WAS THERE COOKING SHERRY INVOLVED?

I PROMISED I WOULDN'T SAY
ANYTHING, BUT I CAN'T HELP IT!

IT IS SO WONDERFUL.

DO YOU KNOW HOW WONDERFUL IT IS?

NO, NO, I DON'T, BUT I
WOULD LOVE TO WEIGH IN.

YOU'RE WITH LUKE.

AH, HOW DID YOU KNOW?

LUKE TOLD ME. OH.

NO, I'M SORRY, LUKE DIDN'T
TELL ME. KIRK TOLD ME.

KIRK TOLD YOU? HE SAW
YOU. HE SAW YOU KISS LUKE.

OH, MY GOD. YOU
WERE KISSING LUKE!

WELL, SOOKIE, I...

OH, I AM SO GLAD!

YOU 2 ARE PERFECT
FOR EACH OTHER.

I HAVE ALWAYS THOUGHT THAT SOMEDAY,
IF YOU JUST SORT OF TURNED AROUND

AND OPENED YOUR
EYES, THAT YOU'D SEE IT.

AND NOW YOU HAVE,
I'M JUST SO DAMN HAPPY.

WELL, I'M...

OH, YOU'RE NOT GONNA DIE ALONE.
I MEAN, SOMEBODY WILL BE THERE.

SOMEBODY WILL KNOW.

SOMEBODY WILL FIND THE
BODY AND CALL THE POLICE AND...

YES, THAT IS A RELIEF.

I CAN'T BELIEVE KIRK SAW US.

I THOUGHT HE WAS ASLEEP.

DON'T WORRY. I CONVINCED
HIM HE WAS DREAMING IT ALL.

SO I DON'T THINK
HE'LL SAY ANYTHING.

I KNOW YOU'RE
CONCERNED ABOUT THAT.

WHY ARE YOU
CONCERNED ABOUT THAT?

WHO SAID I WAS
CONCERNED ABOUT THAT?

LUKE. HE ASKED ME
NOT TO SAY ANYTHING.

HE SAID HE WASN'T SURE
IF YOU WANTED IT OUT.

WHY WASN'T HE SURE
IF YOU WANTED IT OUT?

I DON'T KNOW.

HOW WAS IT? HOW WAS...

YOU KNOW. WAS IT
ON TOP OF A TABLE?

'CAUSE I ALWAYS THOUGHT IT
WOULD BE ON TOP OF A TABLE,

LIKE IN BULL DURHAM.

THERE WAS NO SEX.

NO SEX? WHY NO SEX?

CAN'T LUKE...

I'M SURE HE CAN.
THERE WAS NO TIME.

EVERYTHING HAPPENED SO FAST.
WE WERE HERE WITH THE TOWN

AND MY PARENTS FLIPPING
OUT AND JASON SHOWING UP.

OH, NO. JASON. WHAT
HAPPENED TO JASON?

OH, HIS CONDO WAS ON FIRE.

IT WAS?

WELL, THAT'S WHAT MICHEL HAD ME
SAY WHEN WE CALLED HIS CELL PHONE.

OH.

HEY, YOU DON'T SEEM HAPPY.

ABOUT WHAT? ABOUT LUKE.

OF COURSE I'M HAPPY ABOUT LUKE.

IT'S JUST NEW.

I'M STILL PROCESSING
IT, THAT'S ALL.

BUT HE KNOWS
YOU'RE HAPPY, RIGHT?

I MEAN, HE KNOWS
YOU'RE PROCESSING

BUT ONCE YOU PROCESS,
THERE'S GONNA BE SEX, RIGHT?

HE KNOWS.

I THINK HE KNOWS.

HE SHOULD KNOW. I HOPE HE KNOWS.

WELL, MAKE SURE HE KNOWS, OK?

BECAUSE YOU 2 TOGETHER...

EQUALS GETTING TO THE
MORGUE BEFORE I SMELL. I GOT IT.

OH, YES. YEAH.

HEY. FINISHED BREAKFAST ALREADY?

YEAH, I WAS JUST
LEAVING YOU A NOTE.

AH, YOU KIND OF
WOLFED IT DOWN THERE.

I'M A LIGHT EATER.

SO, UM, YOU LEAVING?

YEP.

RORY, DON'T YOU WANT TO TALK?

WE ALREADY DID.

OH, YEAH, BUT, UH, YOU DIDN'T
HEAR WHAT I WANTED TO TALK ABOUT

WHICH WAS HOW JACKSON
IS PROBABLY GONNA HAVE TO

DISLOCATE SEVERAL
OF DAVEY'S LIMBS

TRYING TO PRY HIM AWAY
FROM PATTY AND BABBETTE.

I HAVE TO GO.

RORY, CAN'T WE JUST SIT DOWN
FOR A SECOND AND TALK ABOUT THIS?

I ALREADY HEARD EVERYTHING
YOU HAD TO SAY LAST NIGHT.

YOU KNOW WHAT? FINE.
I GIVE. IT'S YOUR LIFE.

DO WHAT YOU WANT. THANK YOU.

YOU'RE 19. YOU KNOW
WHAT YOU'RE DOING.

I DO KNOW WHAT I'M DOING.

SO YOU DON'T WANT TO
TALK, WE WON'T TALK. GOOD.

I WASN'T THINKING WE HAD
TO TALK LIKE MOM AND KID.

I THOUGHT WE COULD TALK AS
FRIENDS, BUT, HEY, FORGET IT.

I WILL. NOT THAT I
TAKE BACK WHAT I SAID.

THAT'S YOUR PREROGATIVE.

I MEAN,

HE'S MARRIED, AND,
UH, AS YOUR FRIEND,

I HAVE EVERY RIGHT TO
POINT OUT THE OBVIOUS.

WHICH YOU DID, TWICE NOW.

OK, AND I STAND BY IT

THOUGH I FELT MAYBE I COULD HELP
YOU FIGURE OUT HOW TO HANDLE THIS

AS YOUR FRIEND WHO YOU USUALLY
TURN TO TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT

HOW TO HANDLE THINGS, BUT IF
YOU DON'T WANT TO TALK, THEN FINE.

GREAT. WE WON'T TALK.

LOVE THE THOUGHT. SO
DON'T WORRY ABOUT ME

NAGGING YOU TO
TALK ANYMORE. I'M OUT.

TERRIFIC.

IN FACT, I'M... I'M REALLY BUSY,
SO IF YOU DID CHANGE YOUR MIND...

WHICH I WON'T.

OK, BUT IF YOU DID, I'M SORRY.

I CAN'T HELP.

UM, TAYLOR LOST A
SHOE, SO GET IN LINE.

ANY END TO THIS SPEECH IN SIGHT?

BYE.

AH-HA. I TOLD YOU I'D
SEEN IT SOMEWHERE.

LOOK AT THIS.

OH, RIGHT.

UH, MICHEL, HI.

COULD YOU COME OVER
HERE FOR A MINUTE?

VERY SORRY ABOUT THIS, TAYLOR.

YES?

HEY, UM, HERE I HAVE A... A LIST OF
SERVICES, ALL PRINTED UP NICE AND NEAT

INCLUDING SEAWEED WRAPS,
FACIAL PEELS, WATSU MASSAGE

AND COMPLIMENTARY SHOESHINES,
ALL OF WHICH WE DO NOT OFFER.

WELL, WE SHOULD.

MICHEL.

I MENTIONED THEM SEVERAL TIMES
BEFORE, BUT YOU DON'T LISTEN TO ME.

SOOKIE WANTS TO MAKE
EACH GUEST A MERINGUE HAT

AND YOU SAY, "OH, SOOKIE,
WHAT A BRILLIANT IDEA."

BUT I WANT TO PAMPER OUR GUESTS

WITH SERVICES THAT WE DON'T HAVE

AND YOU TELL ME TO
ANSWER THE PHONE.

I'M VERY SORRY
ABOUT THIS, TAYLOR.

WE WILL REPLACE YOUR
SHOES, I PROMISE YOU.

FINE. I'M A
6-AND-A-HALF, NARROW.

OK.

I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DID THIS.

OH, YOU CAN, TOO.

GET ON THE PHONE, FIND ME SHOES
AND HAVE THEM HERE BY TONIGHT

AND GET YOUR DOGS OFF
THE PREMISES IMMEDIATELY.

MY DOGS AREN'T...

IT'S BEEN A ROUGH WEEKEND.
DON'T SCREW WITH ME.

UH, IF KIRK CAN SLEEP
INSIDE, WHY CAN'T MY CHOWS?

GET THEM AND TAKE THEM HOME.

OK. OK.

I JUST HAVE TO LOCATE PAU-PAU.

WHAT? HE WENT OUT
FOR A WALK. HE'S AROUND.

HE WAS JUST TESTING
HIS BOUNDARIES.

APPARENTLY SO ARE YOU.

I'M GOING.

PAU-PAU.

LUKE'S.

IT'S ME.

HELLO?

IT'S ME.

OH, HI.

CAN WE TALK?

UH, WELL, WE'RE KIND OF BUSY.

BURGER AND PATTY MELT.

I JUST WANTED TO TALK.

TALK ABOUT WHAT?

WHAT?

TALK ABOUT WHAT?

COULD YOU FIND A QUIETER PLACE?

LIKE WHERE?

JUST GO OUTSIDE.

PHONE DOESN'T REACH OUTSIDE.

SOMETHING THAT LOOKS LIKE TUNA.

USE YOUR CELL PHONE.

UH, I DON'T HAVE A CELL PHONE.

WHAT HAPPENED TO THE
PHONE NICOLE GAVE YOU?

SHE GOT IT BACK IN THE DIVORCE.

ACTUALLY, I THREW IT IN
THE LAKE AFTER THE DIVORCE.

UH, JEEZ, WHAT THE HELL
IS GOING ON OVER THERE?

WHAT'S GOING ON OVER THERE?

HOLD ON.

YOU HOLD ON, TOO.

I'M GOOD.

I'M GOOD, TOO.

GOOD.

SO,

YOU WANTED TO TALK.

YEAH.

I JUST REALIZED THAT, UH,

YOU KNOW, WHEN I GOT
BACK UH, LAST NIGHT, I WAS,

UM, A LITTLE DISTRACTED.

HEY, NO BIG DEAL.

UH, NO, NO, IT... IT, WELL,
WAS A BIG DEAL. I JUST, UM...

SERIOUSLY, YOU DON'T NEED TO...

WE KISSED.

YOU AND ME, WE KISSED?

I REMEMBER.

AND IT WAS UNEXPECTED.

LORELAI, RELAX.

I'M FINE IF YOU WANT TO JUST
FORGET IT EVER HAPPENED, REALLY.

NO, I DON'T WANT TO
FORGET IT EVER HAPPENED.

IT WAS A GREAT KISS.

YEAH?

IF ONE OF US HAD BEEN A FROG,

UH, IT WOULD HAVE HAD SOME
SERIOUSLY IMPRESSIVE CONSEQUENCES.

OK.

SO, WHAT DO YOU THINK?

I THINK I'M REALLY RELIEVED
YOU FEEL THAT WAY.

SO YOU CONCUR?

DEAR GOD, YES.

GOOD. SO, THEN, I GUESS
WE'LL DISCUSS THIS LATER.

TONIGHT?

TONIGHT.

OK.

THANKS FOR THE CALL.

WELL, MY PLEASURE.

YOU BETTER FINISH THAT
WHOLE THING, PAU-PAU.

HI, IT'S ME. WE NEED TO MEET.

COME IN.

HEY.

HEY.

I'M GLAD YOU CALLED.

ME, TOO.

EVERYTHING OK AT HOME?

YEAH. EVERYTHING'S OK.

GOOD.

DID I EVER TELL YOU
I LIKE YOUR HAIR?

MY HAIR?

YOUR SHORTER HAIR.

IT'S GROWN OUT A LITTLE.

I LIKE IT.

I LIKE IT, TOO.

SO, UM, YOU WANTED TO TALK?

YEAH, TALK.

WORDS.

LOVE.

YOU WHAT?

I SLEPT WITH DEAN, IN MY
ROOM LAST NIGHT, IN MY BED.

OH, MY GOD!

I KNOW.

WHO WOULD HAVE EVEN THOUGHT
THAT DEAN COULD FIT IN MY BED?

I MEAN, IT'S SO SMALL,
AND HE'S NOT SMALL.

HE'S TALL, NOT SMALL.
GREAT, I'M RHYMING.

I DIDN'T KNOW YOU WERE
EVEN BACK TOGETHER.

WELL, WE'RE NOT. I MEAN,

I GUESS WE ARE NOW, BUT...

I... I'M OUT OF BREATH.

SIT DOWN. AND MY MOM CAUGHT US.

OH, MY GOD.

I MEAN, SHE DIDN'T CATCH
US. WE WERE DONE, BUT SHE...

WE WERE STILL HORIZONTAL.

AND THEN SHE SAW DEAN
COME OUT OF MY ROOM

AND SHE JUST SAID
ALL THESE THINGS.

OH, MY GOD! OH,
MY GOD! OH, MY GOD!

WHAT?

I'M JUST PICTURING IT IN
MY HEAD, AND OH, MY GOD!

YEAH LANE!

I'M BUSY!

OK, BUT HELLO.

GO, TALK, PLEASE.

SO, WE HAD A FIGHT.

YOU AND DEAN. NO, ME AND MY MOM.

RIGHT. SO THEN I
CALLED HIM TODAY

AND I TOLD HIM THAT
WE NEED TO TALK

BECAUSE THERE WERE
QUESTIONS AND CLARIFICATIONS

AND MANY TINY DETAILS
THAT WERE TOTALLY IGNORED

BECAUSE HE'S, LIKE,
PERFECT, YOU KNOW.

BUT I HAD IT ALL PLANNED
OUT, EVERY WORD.

I WAS GOING TO BE PRACTICAL, AND I
WAS GOING TO BE ADULT AND THEN...

YEAH?

AND THEN HE WALKED IN.

YEAH?

AND HE KISSED ME,

AND I COULDN'T THINK.

IT WAS JUST... AND THEN WE...

AGAIN?

WELL, ONCE YOU
GET THE HANG OF IT,

IT'S PRETTY EASY TO DUPLICATE.

WHERE?

WHAT?

WHERE DID YOU DO
IT THE SECOND TIME?

AT MISS PATTY'S.

YOU DID IT AT MISS PATTY'S?

YEAH.

OH, SHE WOULD BE SO PROUD.

I HAD IT ALL PLANNED OUT.

I WAS GOING TO GET
EVERYTHING STRAIGHTENED OUT.

WHY DID HE HAVE
TO WALK IN LIKE THAT?

LANE!

IN A MINUTE!

LANE.

OK, OK, I'M SORRY, I
JUST HAVE TO ASK YOU.

WHAT? HOW WAS IT?

WHY ARE YOU WHISPERING?

BECAUSE I JUST THINK THAT
NO MATTER WHERE SHE IS

MY MOM CAN HEAR
THIS CONVERSATION.

OH, IT WAS A LITTLE SCARY.

WAS HE NICE TO YOU?

YEAH. IT WAS... I MEAN, HE
LOVES ME, AND I LOVE HIM.

OH, MY GOD.

LANE, COME ON!

WHAT?

WE WERE SUPPOSED TO
PRACTICE A HALF AN HOUR AGO.

BRIAN'S BEEN YAMMERING ON ABOUT
GERMS AND SPORES FOR 20 MINUTES.

I'M COMPLETELY FREAKED OUT TO
TOUCH A MICROPHONE EVER AGAIN.

I'M JUST SAYING, AT THE END OF
THE NIGHT, WHO CLEANS THEM?

SHUT UP, BRIAN. LOOK, MAN.

I ONLY HAVE THE
BABYSITTER TILL 6:00.

THEN IT'S MY TURN TO
DRIVE THEM TO GYMBOREE.

DUDE, YOU PROMISED YOU WOULDN'T
TALK ABOUT THE PARENTAL ISSUE

DURING BAND PRACTICE.

WE'RE NOT HAVING BAND PRACTICE,

AND IT'S NOT A PARENTAL ISSUE.

IT'S BEING PART OF
THE CYCLE OF LIFE,

AND THAT, MY FRIEND,
IS PURE ROCK 'N' ROLL.

GO JOIN THE POLYPHONIC
SPREE, YOU FRUITCAKE.

I'M JUST SAYIN' MY
BASS STRAP HAS A SMELL.

HEY SHUT UP, ALL OF YOU!
NOW, THAT IS MY FRIEND

AND SHE IS HERE IN DESPERATE
NEED OF SOME GIRL TALK

AND IN CASE YOU HAVEN'T
NOTICED, I AM A GIRL

AND THIS, RIGHT HERE, IS WHAT
IT'S LIKE TO HAVE A GIRL IN THE BAND.

SO ALL OF YOU, DEAL!

SORRY.

LANE, I THINK I DID
SOMETHING THAT...

WHAT DO YOU THINK? OF WHAT?

OF WHAT I DID. I NEED
SOME PERSPECTIVE.

FROM ME? YES.

YOU NEED SOME
PERSPECTIVE ON SEX FROM ME?

I NEED SOME PERSPECTIVE
ON SEX WITH DEAN FROM YOU.

OH, WELL, DEAN
LOVES YOU. I KNOW.

AND YOU LOVE HIM. I KNOW.

SO IT SEEMS LIKE...

HE'S MARRIED.

I KNOW.

HOW DID I OVERLOOK THAT FACT?

I MEAN, HE SAID THAT
THE MARRIAGE WAS OVER.

HE SAID THAT HE HAD TOLD LINDSAY

OR THAT HE WAS
GOING TO TELL HER,

OR THAT SHE ALREADY
KNEW SOMEHOW,

BUT I... I DIDN'T
ASK ANYTHING ELSE.

WHY DIDN'T I ASK ANYTHING ELSE?

I DON'T KNOW.

I DON'T REMEMBER WHAT HE SAID.

I DON'T REMEMBER
WHAT HE TOLD ME.

I DIDN'T ASK ANYTHING
IMPORTANT. YOU CAN ASK NOW.

I TRIED TO ASK NOW.

I ENDED UP HAVING SEX
ON AN AL GILBERT RECORD.

I NEED TO KNOW
SOME THINGS. I NEED...

OH, I DON'T KNOW
WHAT I NEED TO DO.

MAYBE YOU SHOULD
TALK TO LORELAI. NO.

B-BUT SHE ALREADY
KNOWS ABOUT YOU GUYS. NO.

BUT SHE'S BETTER THAN
ME AT THIS SORT OF THING

BECAUSE SHE AT LEAST
HAS A FRAME OF REFERENCE.

TALKING TO HER IS NOT AN OPTION.

OK. WELL, THEN...

♪

WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?

I TOLD YOU SHE'D BE MAD.

GET AWAY FROM MY DRUMS!

WELL, YOU WERE IN THERE
TALKIN' ABOUT PANTYHOSE

OR WHATEVER THE HELL
YOU CHICKS TALK ABOUT.

YOU DO NOT, UNDER ANY
CIRCUMSTANCES, TOUCH MY DRUMS!

HE ADJUSTED YOUR SEAT ALSO.

YOU WHAT?

SO, MAKE SURE THEY ALL GET THE THANK-YOU
CARDS, AND LIGHT THE LEMON CANDLES,

SO THE ROOMS SMELL PRETTY
WHEN THEY GET UP THERE.

THANKS, AND GREAT JOB
THIS WEEKEND. GREAT JOB.

OH! MY GOD!

MY, WHAT A LOVELY GREETING.

HOW LONG HAVE YOU
BEEN SITTING THERE?

10 MINUTES. WHY?

YOU SCARED ME. LIKE I'M DRACULA.

OH, MY GOD, MY HEART
WON'T STOP POUNDING.

STOP BEING SO DRAMATIC. I
JUST SHOWED UP FOR LUNCH.

IT'S NOT AS IF I DID
ANYTHING TRULY TERRIFYING

LIKE TELLING YOU THAT BUTT-CRACK-BARING
JEANS HAVE GONE OUT OF STYLE.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN, YOU
SHOWED UP FOR LUNCH?

OUR LUNCH AT 1:00.

YOU, ME, RORY, THE 3 OF US.

WE'RE HAVING LUNCH, AREN'T WE?

I DIDN'T THINK SO. YOU DIDN'T?

WELL, NO, BUT...

WHEN YOU INVITED YOUR
FATHER AND ME FOR THE WEEKEND,

YOU SAID IT INCLUDED A
LUNCH WITH YOU AND RORY.

WELL, YES, I KNOW, BUT
THAT WAS BEFORE YOU LEFT.

WHAT DOES MY LEAVING
HAVE TO DO WITH ANYTHING?

WELL, WHEN YOU LEFT, YOU
WEREN'T HERE ANYMORE.

YOU WERE GONE, SO WE
JUST ASSUMED LUNCH WAS...

THIS LUNCH WAS YOUR IDEA.

YES, I KNOW, BUT...

I DID NOT FORCE IT UPON YOU.

YOU'RE RIGHT, HOWEVER...

IF YOU WERE TOO BUSY OR
YOU DIDN'T WANT IT TO HAPPEN,

THEN YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO
BRING IT UP AT ALL, DID YOU?

NO, I DIDN'T, BUT
YOU LEFT, SEE? SO...

ALL RIGHT, THEN, IT IS NOW 1:00.

YOU SAID LUNCH AT 1:00, I'M HERE,
IT'S 1:00, I'M HUNGRY. WHERE'S RORY?

OK, SEE, YOU LEFT, SO...

SHE'S NOT HERE, IS SHE? N-N-NO.

DIDN'T SHE KNOW ABOUT THE LUNCH?

YES, MOM, SHE KNEW
ABOUT THE LUNCH, BUT YOU...

SO, WE... AND SHE...

I'LL CALL HER.

I'LL WAIT.

MMM-HMM.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

THEY'RE DRUMS,
YOU'RE NOT OUT HERE.

WHAT ARE YOU
TALKING ABOUT? ZACH!

HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO
TELL YOU NOT TO TOUCH MY THINGS?

WE'RE A BAND! WE SHARE!

HELLO?

YOUR GRANDMOTHER
IS HERE FOR HER LUNCH.

BUT SHE LEFT. COULD
YOU JUST GET BACK HERE?

I'M KIND OF BUSY.

RORY, THIS IS NOT FOR ME, OK?

THIS IS FOR YOUR GRANDMOTHER.

YOU LIKE YOUR
GRANDMOTHER, REMEMBER?

FINE. GREAT.

BYE.

CHILL!

YOU'RE WORSE THAN METALLICA!

I DID THAT.

DID YOU PUT IN THE
MEAT THERMOMETER?

YES, I PUT IN THE
MEAT THERMOMETER.

I PUT IN 3 MEAT THERMOMETERS JUST
IN CASE ONE OF THEM WASN'T WORKING.

AND YOU PUT THE OVEN
ON 450 FOR 20 MINUTES

AND THEN LOWERED IT
TO 350 FOR THE LAST HOUR?

I DID EVERYTHING YOU TOLD ME.

I DID IT EXACTLY
LIKE YOU TOLD ME TO,

AND IT STILL TURNED OUT AWFUL.

MAYBE YOU SHOULD TRY SOMETHING
ELSE, MEATLOAF OR CHICKEN.

NO, DEAN LIKES ROAST BEEF.

WE HAD IT AT OUR WEDDING.

HIS MOTHER MAKES IT EVERY
TIME WE GO OVER THERE.

I'M MAKING DINNER TONIGHT,
AND IT HAS TO BE PERFECT.

SO JUST... TELL ME
HOW TO DO IT AGAIN.

OK. A-AND WRITE IT DOWN.

OK. FIRST, YOU RUB
IT WITH A LITTLE OIL,

THEN TAKE SOME
FRESH GROUND PEPPER...

THE WEATHER'S LOVELY.

YES, IT IS.

RORY, DON'T YOU
THINK IT'S LOVELY?

IT'S VERY LOVELY.

YES.

LOVELY.

WELL, I DON'T SEE ANY REASON
TO PUT THIS OFF ANY LONGER.

GIRLS, I HAVE SOMETHING
TO SAY THAT MAY SHOCK YOU.

BUT UNFORTUNATELY, THERE'S
NOTHING I CAN DO ABOUT THAT NOW.

LORELAI, RORY, RICHARD
AND I HAVE SEPARATED.

AND?

WHAT DO YOU MEAN
"AND"? THAT'S NOT ENOUGH?

YOU NEED SOME SORT OF MOB-RELATED
OFFING TO MAKE IT INTERESTING?

NO, MOM, THAT'S PLENTY.
IT'S JUST WE ALREADY KNEW.

RORY DIDN'T.

WELL, I MEAN, I DIDN'T
KNOW KNOW. BUT...

WHY WOULD YOU TELL HER? MOM!

WHO ELSE DID YOU TELL?

SO, YOU HAVEN'T READ PAGE 6?

RORY, IF YOU NEED
TO TALK ABOUT THIS

TO TRY AND UNDERSTAND
WHY THIS IS HAPPENING,

THEN BY ALL MEANS, DO
NOT ASK YOUR MOTHER.

OK, MOM, I'M SORRY.

I'M NOT TRYING
TO BE INSENSITIVE.

IT JUST SEEMED LIKE A THING YOU
AND DAD WERE GOING THROUGH.

I FIGURED YOU'D MAKE UP.

WELL, WE DIDN'T. I SEE THAT.

SO, WOW, YOU'RE
REALLY SEPARATED?

THAT'S RIGHT.

YOUR FATHER'S MOVING
INTO THE POOL HOUSE.

SO THEN, YOU'RE NOT SEPARATED.

OF COURSE WE ARE.

YOU'RE SEPARATED BY THE POOL.

THAT'S IT. THAT'S THE END
OF YOUR INPUT ON THIS.

I'M SORRY, GRANDMA.

WELL, WHAT'S DONE
IS DONE. I'M MOVING ON.

AND TO CELEBRATE THE NEXT STAGE OF
MY LIFE, I'M GOING TO EUROPE BY MYSELF

FOR THE VERY FIRST TIME
SINCE I WAS IN COLLEGE.

I'M LEAVING TONIGHT.

TONIGHT? THAT'S FAST.

WELL, I WANTED TO LEAVE QUICKLY,

SO I CALLED MY TRAVEL AGENT
AND INSISTED THAT HE PUT ME

ON TONIGHT'S PLANE TO
PARIS, NO MATTER WHAT.

HE FINALLY MANAGED TO BUMP
SOMEONE FROM A CHURCH GROUP

AND I'VE GOT MY SEAT,
AND I'M LEAVING AT 10:00.

AND, RORY, MY OFFER
TO YOU STILL STANDS.

WHAT OFFER?

MY OFFER TO ESCORT YOU
AROUND EUROPE THIS SUMMER.

OH.

EVERY YOUNG LADY SHOULD
DO EUROPE THE PROPER WAY

AT LEAST ONCE IN HER LIFE

AND I WOULD BE THRILLED
TO HAVE YOUR COMPANY

ON THIS VERY SPECIAL OCCASION.

OF COURSE, I KNOW
IT'S VERY SHORT NOTICE.

SO IF YOU ALREADY HAVE
PLANS FOR THE SUMMER,

I COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND.

YOU KNOW, I THINK
EUROPE SOUNDS GREAT.

I THINK YOU WOULD
REALLY ENJOY THAT.

I MEAN, REMEMBER,
WE LOVED PARIS.

AND YOU DON'T HAVE
ANYTHING SPECIAL PLANNED

FOR THE SUMMER, DO YOU?

NO, NOTHING SPECIAL.

WELL, THEN, WHAT DO YOU SAY?

WOULD YOU LIKE TO
BE IMPULSIVE WITH ME?

SURE, GRANDMA, I'D LOVE TO.

THAT IS JUST WONDERFUL!

I'LL CALL RALPHIE RIGHT AWAY AND
TELL HIM TO BUMP ANOTHER BAPTIST.

WE'LL HAVE A WONDERFUL
TIME, YOU AND I.

IT'LL BE JUST LIKE GIGI. UH.

LORELAI, I'M GONNA
USE YOUR PHONE.

BE MY GUEST, MOM.

EUROPE?

COOL.

WHAT?

SO, WHAT IS THIS, A
HENRY JAMES NOVEL?

THE YOUNG LADY ACTS UP, AND HER
FAMILY SHIPS HER OFF TO EUROPE?

OH, COME ON.

HOW FAST DID YOU TELL GRANDMA
THAT I HAD NOTHING TO DO THIS SUMMER?

I'M NOT SHIPPING YOU OFF.

OH, PLEASE.

I'M NOT. I'M JUST...

OK, I... I... MAYBE I AM. HA!

I WASN'T PLANNING ON IT

BUT MAYBE SOMEWHERE IN THE
BACK OF MY MIND, I JUST THOUGHT...

SAY GOODBYE TO DAISY MILLER.

OK, FINE, SO MAYBE I
SUGGESTED THE TRIP

TO GIVE YOU SOME TIME TO...

TRAVEL BACK TO THE
TURN OF THE CENTURY?

TO THINK. BUT YOU DID
NOT HAVE TO ACCEPT.

I DID, TOO.

NO, RORY, YOU DIDN'T.
YOU'RE 19 NOW, REMEMBER?

YOU'RE ALL GROWN UP, AND YOU
CAN HANDLE YOUR OWN AFFAIRS.

SORRY. THAT'S A BAD
CHOICE OF WORDS.

YOU CAN, UM, HANDLE
YOUR OWN LIFE EVENTS,

SO IF YOU DIDN'T WANT
TO GO TO EUROPE,

ALL YOU HAD TO DO WAS
SAY YOU DIDN'T WANT TO GO

BUT YOU DIDN'T, SO I
ASSUME YOU DO WANT TO GO.

YOU DO WANT TO GO? HOW COME?

I MEAN, WHAT ABOUT DEAN?

YOU'RE... YOU'RE JUST GONNA
GO OFF AND LEAVE NOW?

NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS.

DID SOMETHING HAPPEN?

DID YOU GUYS HAVE A FIGHT,
OR IS IT SOMETHING ELSE?

IS IT LINDSAY?

WE DIDN'T HAVE A FIGHT.
EVERYTHING IS FINE WITH DEAN.

I WANT TO GO SO I CAN
GET AWAY FROM YOU.

I'M SORRY. WEREN'T YOU SUPPOSED TO
GO THROUGH THIS PHASE LIKE 5 YEARS AGO?

'CAUSE, I MEAN,
SERIOUSLY, AT THIS POINT

STORMING INTO YOUR ROOM
AND BLASTING YOUR GOTH ROCK

IT'S JUST GONNA CONFUSE
YOUR ROOMMATES.

TELL GRANDMA I HAD TO PACK.

♪

♪ IF I COULD WRITE I'D
SET ALL THE WORDS FREE ♪

♪ TO FOLLOW YOU ♪

♪ TELL YOU WONDER ♪

♪ TELL YOU SECRETS
AND SOLITUDE ♪

♪ I'VE HAD TO LET
GO OF SO MUCH ♪

♪ IT'S HARD TO HOLD ON NOW ♪

♪ SOMETHING FAR
OFF IS PULLING ME ♪

♪ AND WHEN I GO THIS TIME ♪

♪ I DON'T THINK
I'M COMING BACK ♪

♪ I TOOK YOUR RING
THAT NEVER COMES OFF ♪

♪ AND PUT IT ON ♪

♪ SORRY TO LOSE YOU ♪

♪ SORRY TO KEEP YOU ♪

♪ AFTER YOU WERE GONE ♪

♪ NOTHING IS SMALL
NOTHING IS UNEXPECTED ♪

♪ I WANT MORE ♪

♪ WHEN I GO THIS TIME ♪

♪ I DON'T THINK
I'M COMING BACK ♪

COME ON, GIRLS, HURRY UP.

WE HAVE AN ADVENTURE
TO EMBARK ON.

THERE YOU GO. MY PICTURE
I.D. AND MY BOARDING PASS.

RORY, HURRY UP.

YOU HAVE TO HOLD YOUR OWN
BOARDING PASS AND YOU NEED YOUR I.D.

LORELAI, SAY YOUR GOODBYES HERE.

IF YOU DON'T HAVE
A BOARDING PASS,

YOU CAN'T GO ANY
FARTHER, AM I RIGHT?

I'M RIGHT, LORELAI.

IF YOU NEED TO SEARCH
ME, THAT'S JUST FINE.

DON'T BE AFRAID TO ASK.

BYE, LORELAI. BYE, MOM.

HEY, HEY, HOLD ON A SEC.

YOU HAVE EVERYTHING YOU NEED?

YEAH. YOU HAVE
TRASHY-MAGAZINE MONEY?

THOSE MAGAZINES
MAKE GRANDMA CRAZY.

YEAH, WELL, HERE'S
$20. IT'S A LONG FLIGHT.

RORY, HURRY, PLEASE.

COMING, GRANDMA. I HAVE TO GO.

YEAH, YOU DO. OK, SO, UM,

H-HAVE FUN, AND, UH...

IF YOU NEED TO TALK ABOUT
ANYTHING, JUST PLEASE CALL ME, OK?

OK.

HEY, IT'S ME. UH,

LISTEN, I GOT A CALL
FROM MY SISTER AND T.J.

THEY'RE UP IN MAINE, AND THEY
GOT INTO A LITTLE ACCIDENT.

NOTHING MAJOR, JUST EACH ONE
OF THEM BROKE AN ARM AND A LEG.

SO ANYHOW, THEY CAN'T RUN
THE RENAISSANCE FAIRE BOOTH

FOR A COUPLE OF WEEKS.

SO THEY ASKED ME TO
COME HELP THEM OUT.

AND I, UNFORTUNATELY, ANSWERED
THE PHONE, SO I'M ON MY WAY TO MAINE.

I'LL BE BACK IN ABOUT A WEEK.

OK? BYE.

GREAT.

HEY. IT'S ME AGAIN.

I'M NOT SURE IF WE'RE AT THE
POINT IN THIS RELATIONSHIP

WHERE YOU ACTUALLY NEED TO
KNOW THAT MUCH INFORMATION

ABOUT MY WHEREABOUTS,
SO IF WE'RE NOT, I'M SORRY.

I COULD HAVE JUST SAID I'M GOING
OUT OF TOWN AND I'LL CALL YOU LATER.

SO, I'M GOING OUT OF TOWN,
AND I'LL CALL YOU LATER.

ME AGAIN, THE IDIOT
THAT LEAVES YOU

3 RAMBLING MESSAGES
ON YOUR MACHINE.

I JUST WANTED TO TELL YOU I
GOT A CELL PHONE BEFORE I LEFT.

SO, YOU KNOW, YOU COULD CALL IF
YOU WANT, BUT ONLY IF YOU WANT.

SO, THAT'S IT.

YEAH, A NUMBER MIGHT BE GOOD.

THANK YOU.

860-294-1986.

OK, BYE.

JUST DON'T CHANGE YOUR
MIND UNTIL I GET BACK, OK?

OK. TALK TO YOU LATER.

HELLO?

WELL, IF IT ISN'T DEAN MORIARTY.

YEAH, THIS IS THE LIFE.

SO, ARE LIZ AND T.J. OK?

YEAH, THEY'RE JUST NOT
GETTIN' AROUND TOO WELL.

LIZ IS ALL PANICKED THAT IF THEY
DON'T FINISH OUT THE SEASON,

THEY'RE GONNA LOSE THEIR SPOT
NEXT TO THE APPLE DOLL BOOTH

WHICH IS APPARENTLY THE PRIME
SPOT, SO I SAID I'D HELP THEM OUT.

VERY CHIVALROUS OF YOU.

YEAH, I'M A REGULAR LANCELOT.

SO, YOU GET MY MESSAGES?

OH, NO, DID YOU LEAVE A MESSAGE?

SORRY, MY ANSWERING MACHINE
DROPPED DEAD OF EXHAUSTION.

WHAT DID YOU SAY? NOT MUCH.

OK.

SO...

SO...

THAT WAS A HELL OF A TEST RUN.

YOU MEAN FOR THE INN, OF COURSE.

OF COURSE. YES, IT WAS.

ALTHOUGH, YOU KNOW, UNTIL YOU
HAVE A SUCCESSFUL 2ND GO ROUND

YOU REALLY DON'T KNOW IF
EVERYTHING'S GONNA WORK.

THEN I GUESS THERE'S
GOT TO BE A 2ND GO ROUND.

WELL, YES, IT'S THE ONLY THING THAT
MAKES REALLY GOOD BUSINESS SENSE.

SO, WHERE ARE YOU RIGHT NOW?

UH, ABOUT 10 MINUTES FROM "IF I
LIVED HERE, I'D BLOW MY BRAINS OUT."

AH, YES, I HEAR IT'S LOVELY
THERE THIS TIME OF YEAR.