Gilmore Girls (2000–2007): Season 2, Episode 2 - Hammers and Veils - full transcript

(Lorelai) RORY?

(Rory) LIVING ROOM.

I NEED YOUR ADVICE ON SOMETHING.

WHAT DO YOU THINK? HUH?

NOT GOOD?

I'M NOT SURE. HAVE YOU TRIED
THE ARTS-AND-LEISURE SECTION?

I NEED YOU TO BE SERIOUS.

YOU'RE WEARING A
NEWSPAPER ON YOUR HEAD.

I KNOW.

AND YOU NEED ME TO BE SERIOUS?

I AM TRYING TO FIGURE
OUT VEIL LENGTHS HERE.

OH, WELL, SURE.

SEE, I KIND OF LIKE THIS SHOULDER-LENGTH,
KIND OF SEMI-POOFY THING LIKE THIS.

BUT THERE'S ALSO A LONGER
ONE THAT MAY BE INTERESTING.

LONGER. SURE.

AND THEN THERE'S
THE FULL-ON DIANA.

RIGHT, RIGHT.

WHICH IS NICE, BUT IT
JUST MIGHT BE A LITTLE...

YOU'RE READING ME.

WAIT, DON'T MOVE.

RORY, STOP IT.

THIS ARMS RACE THING
IS REALLY GETTING CRAZY.

WE'RE TRYING TO HAVE A
SERIOUS CONVERSATION ABOUT

THE MOST IMPORTANT
FASHION DECISION OF MY LIFE.

WHY NOT GO TO A WEDDING DRESS
PLACE AND TRY A REAL VEIL ON?

NO WAY. WHY?

TOO MUCH TAFFETA.

GIVES ME COTILLION FLASHBACKS.

OK, FINE. COULD YOU
BEND OVER SO I CAN SEE

WHAT THE WEATHER'S
GONNA BE LIKE TOMORROW?

ACTUALLY, I WENT IN ONE
OF THOSE PLACES YESTERDAY.

YOU DID? WHICH ONE?

MARRY MEME'S.

OH, I SEE WE'RE
GOING TOP OF THE LINE.

OH, IT WAS HORRIBLE!

APPARENTLY YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO ORDER YOUR
WEDDING DRESS THE FIRST DAY OF JUNIOR HIGH.

AND IF YOU HAVEN'T, IT'S
OFF THE RACK FOR YOU, MISSY.

I TRIED ON 3 DIFFERENT DRESSES,
ONE OF WHICH GAVE ME A RASH.

AND I GOTTA SAY HAS ANYONE
MISSED THE BUSTLE? I HAVEN'T.

IT WAS NOT THAT BAD.

THEY ALL LOOKED WRONG.

I'M GOING TO BE GROSS, AND
ALL THE CHILDREN WILL LAUGH.

AND MAX WILL REALIZE HE'S
MADE A HORRIBLE MISTAKE.

AND THEN PEOPLE WILL WALK
AWAY, EXACTLY AS YOU'RE DOING NOW.

LET'S GO.

WHERE?

WEDDING DRESS SHOPPING.

OOH, YOU'RE READING. I'M DONE.

UH, YOU NEED TO SEE DEAN.

HE'S PLAYING SOFTBALL.

YOUR CURE FOR
CANCER'S ALMOST FINISHED.

WE'RE GONNA FIND THE
PERFECT THING FOR YOU

TO WEAR ON THE AISLE ON
YOUR PERFECT WEDDING DAY,

WHERE THERE WILL BE NO
POINTING, MOCKING, OR WALKING OUT.

WHY DID YOU SAY "POINTING"?

KEYS. THANK YOU.

♪ [Where You Lead
by Carole King playing]

♪ IF YOU'RE OUT ON THE ROAD ♪

♪ FEELING LONELY, AND SO COLD ♪

♪ ALL YOU HAVE TO
DO IS CALL MY NAME ♪

♪ AND I'LL BE THERE
ON THE NEXT TRAIN ♪

♪ WHERE YOU LEAD,
I WILL FOLLOW ♪

♪ ANYWHERE THAT YOU TELL ME TO ♪

♪ IF YOU NEED, YOU
NEED ME TO BE WITH YOU ♪

♪ I WILL FOLLOW, OH ♪

♪ WHERE YOU LEAD,
I WILL FOLLOW ♪

♪ ANYWHERE THAT YOU TELL ME TO ♪

♪ IF YOU NEED, YOU
NEED ME TO BE WITH YOU ♪

♪ I WILL FOLLOW WHERE YOU LEAD ♪

OH, SPENDING THE
SUMMER AT CHILTON.

HAPPY, HAPPY, JOY, JOY.

IF I DON'T IMPROVE
MY FRENCH GRADES,

I CAN KISS VASSAR GOODBYE.

YOU NEED TO FOLLOW
A STUDY SCHEDULE.

I'VE TOLD YOU THIS
SINCE 2ND GRADE.

YES, WHICH WORRIES BOTH OF US.

MAYBE I WON'T GO TO COLLEGE.

YOU HAVE TO GO TO COLLEGE.

PRINCESS GRACE
DIDN'T GO TO COLLEGE.

THANK YOU FOR THE
HISTORY LESSON, A. J. BENZA.

TAKE A PILL. MARRY RICH.

HEY. HEY.

YOU DOING THE SUMMER
SCHOOL THING, TOO?

UH, YEAH.

WHAT CLASSES ARE YOU TAKING?

WELL, I, UH...

[clears throat]

WHAT?

UH, YOU'RE NOT TALKING TO ME.

I'M NOT?

TRISTIN?

P.J. HARVEY? OH, YEAH,

I'M JUST GONNA
LOOK AT THE BOARD,

THEN YOU CAN GET BACK
TO YOUR CONVERSATION.

THERE'S A REBUILDING TOGETHER
THING GOING ON TOMORROW.

YOU KNOW, THEY FIX UP
HOMES FOR THE NEEDY.

IT'S A TOTAL EASY GIG

THAT LOOKS GREAT ON
YOUR COLLEGE TRANSCRIPT.

SORRY.

THANKS, I'LL THINK ABOUT IT.

YOU WOULDN'T LIKE IT.

'CAUSE YOU'LL BE THERE?

YES, I'LL BE THERE.

I'LL THINK ABOUT IT.

YOU DON'T WANT TO GO.

I'LL SEE.

YOU DON'T. IT'S NOT YOU.

UH, I HAVE MULTIPLE
PERSONALITIES.

IT MIGHT BE ONE OF ME.

IT'S HOURS OF HAMMERING,
AND DRILLING, AND DIRT.

AND IT'S HORRIBLE,
YOU'LL HATE IT.

HOW DO YOU KNOW? HOW DO YOU
KNOW THAT I DON'T SPEND HOURS

EVERY WEEK
HAMMERING AND DRILLING?

AND DIRT? I LOVE
DIRT. I COLLECT IT.

YOU'RE HILARIOUS.

YOU'RE PATHETIC.

FINE. FORGET IT.

WHY DON'T YOU WANT ME TO GO?

I DON'T CARE IF YOU GO.

YOU JUST SPENT A GREAT DEAL OF
ENERGY TRYING TO CONVINCE ME NOT TO.

I'M LATE FOR CLASS.

ARE YOU SERIOUS
YOU GOING TO BE MAD

ABOUT THE FACT YOU
THOUGHT I WAS DATING TRISTIN,

EVEN THOUGH I
WASN'T, ALL YOUR LIFE?

I HAVE GREAT COMMITMENTS.

YOU DON'T SEE
HOW STUPID THAT IS?

I'M SORRY IF YOU THOUGHT
WE HAD SOME KIND OF DEEP

THELMA-AND-LOUISE THING
GOING HERE, BUT WE DIDN'T.

WELL, HAVE IT YOUR WAY,
BUT I'M GOING TOMORROW.

FINE, GO. SEE IF I CARE.

I WILL.

GREAT. I HATE SUMMER!

RORY.

OH, HENRY. HI, NICE TO SEE YOU.

YOU, TOO. WHAT
CLASSES ARE YOU TAKING?

SHAKESPEARE, PHYSICS,
OBSCURE RUSSIAN POETRY.

WOW. I'M STILL TRYING TO GET THROUGH
TRIG., BUT, HEY, 3RD TIME'S THE CHARM.

I CAN HELP YOU IF YOU WANT.

I JUST MAY TAKE YOU UP ON THAT.

OK. OK.

LANE'S FINE.

I HAVEN'T TALKED
TO HER IN A WHILE.

I CALLED ONCE. I CALLED ONCE.

AND?

HER MOTHER ANSWERED. OOPS.

SHE SOUNDED ANGRY.

NO, THAT'S JUST MRS. KIM.

I HUNG UP, 12 TIMES.

ON THE 13TH TIME, SHE SAID SHE WAS
GOING TO HAVE THE F.B.I. TRACE THE CALL

AND HAVE ME THROWN IN PRISON.

AND THOUGH I KNOW THE PUNISHMENT

FOR MULTIPLE HANG-UPS
PROBABLY ISN'T PRISON,

SHE JUST SOUNDED SO CAPABLE
OF DOING REAL DAMAGE THAT I...

STOPPED CALLING?

AND LANE PROBABLY
THINKS I FORGOT ABOUT HER.

YOU WANT ME TO
TELL HER YOU HAVEN'T?

THAT WOULD BE GOOD. DONE.

AND MAYBE YOU COULD GIVE HER
MY NUMBER AND SHE CAN CALL ME.

I'LL GET RIGHT ON IT.

THANKS.

THANK YOU. OK, BYE.

BYE.

UH, HENRY.

WHAT?

YOUR TRIG. NOTES.

AH!

I THINK WE MAY HAVE
NAILED DOWN THE PROBLEM.

(Lorelai) "MOM, TOMORROW
I'M GOING TO BUILD A HOUSE."

HELP BUILD A HOUSE.

DID YOU TELL THEM THERE'S
A LIGHT BULB IN YOUR CLOSET

THAT BURNED OUT IN '97
YOU STILL HAVEN'T CHANGED?

IT'S FOR CHARITY.

DON'T THOSE PEOPLE
HAVE ENOUGH PROBLEMS

WITHOUT HAVING YOU
AS A CONTRACTOR?

I'M SURE THERE WILL BE REAL
CONSTRUCTION WORKERS THERE.

I WILL BE ASSISTING
AND HELPING OUT

THOSE LESS
FORTUNATE THAN MYSELF.

I WILL BE GETTING
COLLEGE CREDIT,

AND THIS IS THE END OF THIS
PARTICULAR CONVERSATION.

YOU'RE RIGHT, IT'S
A GOOD THING. NICE.

KEEPS YOUR HALO SHINY.

OH, WAIT, WAIT.

WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO TELL THEM?

SOON.

WHEN IS SOON?

WHEN THE BIG HAND HITS THE
"S" AND THE LITTLE HAND "OON."

YOU'RE GETTING
MARRIED IN 3 MONTHS.

I THINK YOU SHOULD
TELL THEM NOW.

RING THE BELL.

THE LONGER YOU WAIT,
THE HARDER IT'LL BE.

WILL YOU PLEASE RING THE BELL?

YOU CAN TELL THEM BEFORE DINNER.

I WILL TELL THEM WHEN
I'M READY TO TELL THEM.

YOU HAVE TO ACCEPT THAT
BECAUSE I'M THE MOTHER.

IN SOME CULTURES, THAT MEANS
YOU HAVE TO DO WHAT I SAY.

IF YOU DON'T TELL
THEM IN 2 WEEKS, I WILL.

APPARENTLY NOT IN THIS ONE.

GOOD.

WE'RE GOING TO
HAVE TO EAT QUICKLY.

YOUR FATHER HAS A VERY EARLY
FLIGHT TOMORROW MORNING.

OH, I'M GOOD.

RORY'S GOING TO BUILD
A HOUSE TOMORROW.

I THOUGHT IT WAS
A LITTLE WEIRD, TOO.

(Emily) WALK AS
YOU BABBLE, PLEASE.

SOMEBODY MUST HAVE
SCRATCHED THE SILVER.

BRING THE BREAD OUT, TOO.

AND POUR THE WINE, PLEASE.

COME ON, HURRY UP.

YEAH, BECAUSE WE DON'T
WANT OUR SALAD TO GET COLD.

RICHARD, DINNER.

MOM.

EAT, EAT.

SHOULDN'T WE WAIT FOR DAD?

DON'T WORRY ABOUT HIM.

HE'S THE ONE WITH
THE EARLY PLANE.

WE DON'T HAVE TO GO ANYWHERE.

WE CAN STAY ALL
NIGHT, HAVE A PARTY,

DO SOME JELL-O SHOTS, PLAY LIGHT
AS A FEATHER, STIFF AS A BOARD.

OK, PASS THE BREAD.

GRANDMA, WOULD YOU LIKE...

YES, PLEASE.

YOU STARTED.

YOU HAVE A 6:00 FLIGHT.

6:00? ARE YOU SURE?

WHAT DO YOU MEAN I'M
SURE? OF COURSE I'M SURE.

I DOUBLE CHECKED IT 3 TIMES WITH YOUR
SECRETARY, BECAUSE I KNOW SHE'S AN IDIOT,

AND ALL 3 TIMES
SHE TOLD ME 6:00.

I WROTE IT DOWN.

I HAVE YOUR TICKET
RIGHT OUT ON THE...

YOU'RE TEASING ME.

VERY POSSIBLE.

I DON'T FIND THAT
AMUSING, RICHARD.

EXACTLY THE POINT
OF TEASING, EMILY.

HELLO, LORELAI.

HELLO, FATHER.

RORY.

GRANDPA.

MAY I, UH, SPEAK WITH YOU
FOR A MOMENT, PLEASE?

OK.

HMM. I WONDER WHAT
THAT'S ALL ABOUT.

I GUESS WE'LL FIND
OUT LATER, RIGHT?

HEY, WHATEVER HAPPENED TO XUXA?

I JUST THOUGHT WE SHOULD
TOUCH BASE, YOU AND I,

AFTER THAT UNFORTUNATE
INCIDENT LAST WEEK.

GRANDPA, YOU ALREADY
CALLED ME ABOUT THAT.

YES, I KNOW, BUT I
THOUGHT TAKING A MOMENT

TO ONCE AGAIN SAY TO
YOU IN PERSON HOW...

I KNOW, AND I APPRECIATE IT.

WE'VE NEVER HAD A FIGHT.

NO.

THIS WAS OUR FIRST ONE.

YES, IT WAS.

AND I MUST SAY, I
DIDN'T CARE FOR IT.

NEITHER DID I.

WELL, ALL RIGHT.

WE SHOULD GO BACK INSIDE.

WE'RE FINE NOW, RIGHT?

WE'RE FINE.

BUCK UP, PRIVATE.

OH, WAIT. I WANTED TO
GIVE YOU SOMETHING.

WHAT? COME ON, COME ON.

HEY, WHERE ARE YOU GUYS GOING?

(Richard) WE'LL BE RIGHT THERE.

WELL, HURRY, YOU'RE MISSING
ONE HELL OF A CONVERSATION.

YOU KNOW, MOM, I'M REALLY
LOVING THIS SALAD DRESSING.

I'M GLAD.

LEMONY.

YES.

NOTHING LIKE A NICE SALAD
OF LEMONY GOODNESS.

HMM.

[sighs]

MOM.

HMM?

I HAVE SOMETHING TO TELL YOU.

YES?

WELL, IT'S LIKE THIS. UM...

COULD YOU PUT DOWN
YOUR FORK FOR A SECOND?

THANK YOU.

OK. UM, YOU KNOW MAX?

NO, I DON'T.

OK, I KNOW YOU DON'T KNOW-HIM
KNOW HIM, BUT YOU KNOW OF HIM, RIGHT?

I'VE HEARD RUMBLINGS.

OK. WELL, UM,

[sighs]

UH...

MAX AND I HAVE BEEN SERIOUS
FOR QUITE A WHILE NOW.

AND HE ASKED ME TO
MARRY HIM AND I SAID YES.

I'M GETTING MARRIED.

WELL, I THINK THAT'S VERY NICE.

I CERTAINLY HOPE
WE'LL BE IN TOWN FOR IT,

BUT IF NOT, I PROMISE
WE'LL SEND A NICE GIFT.

NOW EXCUSE ME.

I'M GOING TO CHECK ON THE ROAST.

ARE YOU OK?

I'M PERFECT. REALLY?

I HAVE HIT A LEVEL OF PERFECTION

THAT'S RARELY SEEN OUTSIDE
THE VICTORIA'S SECRET CATALOG.

I'M REALLY SORRY.

OH, DO NOT BE SORRY.

WHAT HAPPENED
TONIGHT WAS INEVITABLE.

I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN
NOT TO TELL MY MOTHER.

YOU WERE TRYING TO BE NICE.

TELLING HER I WAS GETTING
MARRIED TO A WONDERFUL GUY

WHO WILL LOVE ME
AND MAKE ME HAPPY.

THAT, AND GIVING HER MY
ADDRESS WHEN I FINALLY MOVED OUT.

2 WORST MOVES I MADE.

MAYBE SHE'LL THINK ABOUT IT
AND CALL YOU AND SAY SHE'S SORRY.

"MOM, I'M GETTING MARRIED."

I'M AN IDIOT. AND, YOU KNOW,
AS MY MOUTH WAS OPENING,

MY MIND WAS SCREAMING, "DON'T
DO IT. I MEAN IT. YOU'LL REGRET IT."

BUT DID MY MOUTH LISTEN?

NO. NO.

AND IT OPENED, AND THE WORDS
CAME OUT, AND EMILY WAS EMILY,

AND MY MOUTH WAS STUNNED,
AND MY MIND SAID, "I TOLD YOU SO."

AND THEN MY MOUTH
GOT MAD 'CAUSE NO MOUTH

LIKES TO HAVE ITS
NOSE RUBBED IN IT.

NOW MY MIND AND
MOUTH AREN'T TALKING.

IT'LL BE WEEKS BEFORE WE
GET THE BOYS TOGETHER AGAIN.

YOUR MOUTH HAS A NOSE?

GOD, I'M CRABBY. YOU'RE HUNGRY.

NO, I'M NOT.

YOU DIDN'T EAT ANY
OF YOUR DINNER.

BY THE TIME I GOT MY
JAW OFF THE GROUND,

SPEED RACER HAD TAKEN MY PLATE.

LUKE WILL CHEER YOU
UP, WON'T YOU, LUKE?

OH, SURE, I'M GREAT
AT SPREADING THE JOY.

WHAT WILL YOU HAVE?

WE'LL HAVE 2 COFFEES
AND A RANT MEAL.

EXTRA CHEESE.

NO. WHY?

I'M THROUGH RANTING.

I'LL HAVE AN ACCEPTANCE
MEAL AND A SIDE OF FRIES.

PLEASE, YOU HAVE
NOT ACCEPTED THIS.

I'M A GROWN WOMAN. I DO NOT NEED

MY MOTHER'S PERMISSION
OR BLESSING TO BE HAPPY.

MUST HAVE BEEN A
GOOD OPRAH TODAY.

JUST A LITTLE FAMILY
DRAMA. NO BIGGIE.

IT'S A LITTLE BIG.

YEAH? WHAT'S GOING ON?

I TOLD MY MOTHER ABOUT ME GETTING
MARRIED AND IT WAS SLIGHTLY UGLY.

YEP. YEP WHAT?

NOW THERE'S NOTHING LIKE A
WEDDING TO SCREW UP A FAMILY.

IN MY CASE THERE'S NOTHING LIKE
A FAMILY TO SCREW UP A FAMILY.

SOMETHIN' THAT'S
SUPPOSED TO START NICE.

2 PEOPLE MAKING
PROMISES EACH OTHER:

"I LOVE YOU FOREVER. I
WANT TO DIE WHEN YOU DIE.

MY LIFE MEANT NOTHING UNTIL
YOU USED MY TOOTHBRUSH."

AND THEN IT STARTS.

WELL, THAT'S NOT EXACTLY...

WHO DO YOU INVITE?
WHO SITS WHERE?

OPEN BAR? YES OR NO? LUKE...

AUNTIE JUNY DOESN'T EAT CHICKEN.

UNCLE MOMO'S OFF HIS MEDS.

JUNY AND MOMO?

JUST AN EXAMPLE.

OF A RETIRED CIRCUS COUPLE?

AFTER ALL THAT PLANNING, THE
RECEPTION WILL STILL BE A DISASTER.

BECAUSE NO MATTER WHAT YOU
DO, HOW CAREFULLY YOU PLAN,

HALFWAY THROUGH ONE OF THOSE
NAUSEATING BETTE MIDLER BALLADS,

SOMEONE'S GETTING DRUNK, OR SOMEONE'S
SLEEPING WITH SOMEONE ELSE'S WIFE,

AND A CHICKEN KIEV
LANDS ON THE CAKE.

YOU KNOW, THE GETTYSBURG
ADDRESS WAS ONLY

ONE PAGE LONG, AND
THAT WAS ABOUT A WAR.

I JUST CALL THEM
LIKE I SEE THEM.

I'VE OFFICIALLY
CHANGED MY ORDER.

I'LL HAVE THE LUKE'S-GIVING-LORELAI-
A-MIGRAINE MEAL.

BLUE CHEESE OR RANCH?

BOTH.

COMIN' RIGHT UP.

[dog barking]

TIME?

8:30.

I'M LATE.

HOLD ON. COFFEE.

THANKS. I'LL SEE YOU TONIGHT.

WAIT. ONE SEC.

MOM, I HAVE TO BE
THERE IN 20 MINUTES.

(Lorelai) I MADE YOU
SOMETHING REALLY COOL.

CAN IT WAIT TILL TONIGHT?

IT WON'T BE COOL TONIGHT.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT
WON'T BE COOL TONIGHT?

WHAT LOSES ITS COOL
FACTOR IN 12 HOURS?

THIS.

WHAT IS THAT?

A HAMMER.

IT HAS FEATHERS ON IT. WHY?

SO THE RHINESTONES AND
BOWS WON'T FEEL LONELY.

WHAT DO I DO WITH IT?

BUILD A REALLY PRETTY HOUSE.

HOW LONG WILL IT TAKE TO
TALK YOU OUT OF GIVING IT?

40 MINUTES, AN HOUR TOPS.

HAND IT OVER.

CALL ME WHEN YOU
GET HOME. BE CAREFUL.

I WILL.

I MEAN IT, TIMMY. NO
FALLING DOWN THE WELL. BYE.

OH.

JEEZ, YOU SCARED ME.

SORRY. WHERE YOU GOIN'?

I'M DOING THAT REBUILDING
TOGETHER THING TODAY.

RIGHT. I'LL BE FAST.

HERE'S MY C.Ds, MY 'ZINES,
MY POSTERS, MY BOOKS,

3 OF MY SWEATERS, AND
ONE VIVA GLAM LIPSTICK.

I'LL LEAVE THEM HERE
WHILE I'M IN KOREA

BECAUSE MOTHER IS
BOUND TO SEARCH MY ROOM.

IF SHE FINDS THEM,
SHE'LL THROW THEM OUT

AND THEN SPEND THE
SUMMER PRAYING FOR MY SOUL.

I'LL TREAT THEM LIKE MY OWN.

OK. NOW, THIS IS THE
LANE KIM RETRIEVAL KIT.

IT CONTAINS THE PHONE
NUMBER OF MY COUSINS IN KOREA,

A MAP OF THE HOUSE I'LL BE
STAYING AT, A PICTURE OF ME NOW,

AND A MOCK-UP OF ME IN 6 MONTHS.

YOU LOST SOME WEIGHT.

NOW THIS IS THAT NAME OF THAT
GUY AT THE AMERICAN CONSULATE

AND SEVERAL IMPORTANT KOREAN
PHRASES WRITTEN OUT PHONETICALLY:

"HELP," "HAVE YOU SEEN THIS GIRL?"
"COMES FOR MONEY," ET CETERA.

STILL NO RETURN DATE
INFO FROM THE PARENTS?

NOPE. BUT THEY DID
BUY ME A WINTER COAT.

WHEN ARE YOU GOING?

RIGHT AFTER YOUR
MOM'S ENGAGEMENT...

SHH.

DO YOU THINK SHE HEARD ME?

I DON'T THINK SO.

NO, SHE'D BE HERE GRILLING
US FOR DETAILS IF SHE HAD.

SHE WOULDN'T PRETEND,
TO NOT KILL THE SURPRISE?

AND RISK CLASHING
WITH THE DECOR?

RIGHT. OK, I GOT TO GO.

HEY, HENRY...

CALLED HIM. AND?

HE LIKES ME. HE'S PERFECT.

I'LL NEVER SEE HIM AGAIN.

YOU'LL READ ABOUT
IT IN MY NOVEL:

A CONNECTICUT YANKEE IN PUSAN.

HEY.

HI.

WHERE YOU GOIN'?

I HAVE TO BUILD A HOUSE.

OK, SO WHERE YOU GOIN'?

I'M SERIOUS.

YOU'RE GOING TO BUILD A HOUSE?

IT'S FOR CHARITY, AND I'M LATE.

WHY DON'T YOU GO ON INSIDE?

YOU AND MOTHER CAN CONTINUE
THE RORY'S-BUILDING-A-HOUSE ROUTINE.

THEN MOVE ON TO
"WHO'S ON FIRST?"

HOW LONG ARE YOU
GOING TO BE GONE?

I DON'T KNOW. WHY?

I JUST THOUGHT WE
COULD HANG TODAY,

MAYBE SEE A MOVIE,
GET SOMETHING TO EAT.

WE COULD GO TO A BOOKSTORE, I'LL
WATCH YOU BROWSE FOR 6 OR 7 HOURS.

OH, I WOULD LOVE TO, BUT I
HAVE TO DO THIS THING TODAY.

BLOW IT OFF. I CAN'T.

DID I MENTION THE
BOOKSTORE FOR 6 OR 7 HOURS?

HOW ABOUT TONIGHT?

WE CAN GET A PIZZA
AND GO ON AMAZON.

YOU'LL BE JUST AS BORED WATCHING
ME ORDER BOOKS, I PROMISE.

[sighs]

DEAL. GOOD. I HAVE TO GO.

[hammering]

[drilling]

EXCUSE ME.

HEY, YOU'RE TOUCHING
A MAN WITH A SAW.

YOU DON'T TOUCH A MAN WITH
A SAW, WHAT ARE YOU THINKIN'?

I'M SORRY.

I COULD HAVE HURT MYSELF.

I COULD HAVE HURT YOU.

A TON OF HURT ALMOST
HAPPENED HERE.

I REALLY AM SORRY.

I'VE NEVER BEEN ON
A JOB SITE BEFORE.

IT'S NICE.

OK, WHERE YOU FROM?

CHILTON. MY NAME...

COME ON, CHILTON.

NO, IT'S RORY.
CHILTON'S MY SCHOOL.

YOU GOT A HAMMER?

OH, YES, SIR.

WHERE IS IT?

[sawing]

[drilling]

IT'S A REAL HAMMER UNDERNEATH.

THAT'S A HAMMER?

IT'S JUST DRESSED UP A LITTLE.

YOU DRESSED UP A HAMMER?

N-NO, MY MOTHER
DID. SHE DOES THAT.

SHE, UM, SHE TAKES THINGS THAT
AREN'T PRETTY, AND MAKES THEM PRETTY,

LIKE A HAMMER.

YOU KNOW, ONE TIME, SHE MADE INDIVIDUAL
OUTFITS FOR MY LIQUID PAPER BOTTLES:

A CLOWN, A COWBOY, A NEWSCASTER.

SHE'S NOT INSANE.
SHE JUST SOUNDS IT.

OK.

WORK HERE. WEAR THESE.

DON'T LOOK UP.

PAY ATTENTION TO
YOUR SURROUNDINGS.

THE WORDS "DUCK" OR
"RUN" MEAN DUCK OR RUN.

WEAR SUNSCREEN, DRINK WATER,
GET A BUTTON ON THE WAY OUT.

THAT'S IT? THAT'S
THE INSTRUCTIONS?

BUT I'VE NEVER DONE THIS BEFORE.

WELL, TOMORROW YOU
WON'T BE ABLE TO SAY THAT.

BUT PEOPLE ACTUALLY HAVE
TO LIVE IN THESE HOUSES.

THEY MAY HAVE KIDS,
OR PETS, OR BREAKABLES.

YOU HAVE TROUBLE, ASK
THE PERSON NEXT TO YOU.

(man) LOOK OUT!

HEY, YOU LEARN FAST.

I DIDN'T EVEN MENTION THAT ONE.

THIS IS MY WALL.

WHAT?

I'VE BEEN WORKING HERE. I
PUT TOGETHER THIS ENTIRE WALL.

GO SOMEPLACE ELSE.

YOU PUT TOGETHER THIS WALL?

GO HELP WITH CEMENT.

THAT'S VERY IMPRESSIVE.

I'VE DONE IT A MILLION
TIMES. NO BIG DEAL.

LOUISE, WHAT DID
I JUST TELL YOU?

USE A GRUB AX FOR THAT.

(Louise) BITE ME.

FUNNY, I NEVER PICTURED
YOU AS A BOB VILA KIND OF GIRL.

REBUILDING TOGETHER IS A PRESTIGIOUS
AND RESPECTED ORGANIZATION.

I'VE BEEN VOLUNTEERING
FOR THEM FOR YEARS.

REALLY? YOU JUST
LOVE THE OVERALLS?

I DON'T. HARVARD DOES.

WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?

WHEN YOU APPLY TO
AN IVY LEAGUE SCHOOL,

YOU NEED MORE THAN GOOD GRADES

AND TEST SCORES TO GET YOU IN.

EVERY PERSON WHO
APPLIES TO HARVARD

HAS A PERFECT G.P.A.
AND GREAT TEST SCORES.

IT'S THE EXTRAS THAT
PUT YOU OVER THE TOP:

THE CLUBS, CHARITIES,
VOLUNTEERING. YOU KNOW.

OH, YEAH. I KNOW.

I STARTED VOLUNTEERING
IN 4TH GRADE.

I HANDED OUT COOKIES AT
THE LOCAL CHILDREN'S HOSPITAL.

BY 10, I WAS LEADING
MY FIRST STUDY GROUP.

THE YOUNGEST PERSON
IN THE GROUP WAS 12.

WOW.

I'VE BEEN A CAMP COUNSELOR, I
ORGANIZED A SENIOR LITERACY PROGRAM,

I WORKED A SUICIDE HOT LINE,
I MANNED A RUNAWAY CENTER.

I ADOPTED DOLPHINS, TAUGHT SIGN
LANGUAGE, TRAINED SEEING EYE DOGS.

BUT WHEN DID YOU
HAVE TIME TO HAVE A LIFE?

I'LL HAVE A LIFE AFTER I
GRADUATE FROM HARVARD.

IF YOU'LL EXCUSE ME,

THE DRAINAGE ON THE SOUTH
SIDE OF THIS PLACE SUCKS.

HI.

MADELINE.

BYE.

HEY. YOU LOOK GOOD IN DIRT.

DEAN, HI.

SO HOW WAS IT?

LONG DAY. LONG, LONG DAY.

THE DAY IS OVER. LET'S
TALK ABOUT THE NIGHT.

UH, THERE'S A 7:30
SHOWING OF BARBARELLA.

AND I THOUGHT YOU CAN
BRING YOUR MOM'S PURSE,

YOU KNOW, THE ONE
WITH THAT MONKEY FACE,

AND WE'LL SNEAK IN
SOME BURGERS AND...

WHAT? I CAN'T.

GET YOUR MOM'S PURSE?

I CAN'T DO ANYTHING TONIGHT.

WHY NOT?

BECAUSE I HAVE A LOT
OF PLANNING TO DO.

WHAT PLANNING?

I'M LIKE 10 YEARS BEHIND
ON MY EXTRACURRICULARS.

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

PARIS HAS BEEN ACCUMULATING
THESE THINGS SINCE SHE COULD WALK.

SHE'S A LIST OF ENOUGH
GOOD DEEDS TO BUMP

MOTHER TERESA OFF
THE HARVARD LIST.

OK, I'M LOST.

I'VE BEEN STUDYING MY
BUTT OFF MY WHOLE LIFE

AND I REALLY THOUGHT
THAT THAT WAS ENOUGH.

BUT THEN PARIS TELLS ME THAT
EVERYONE MAKES GOOD GRADES.

AND IT'S THE EXTRAS THAT
PUT YOU OVER THE TOP.

AND I THOUGHT SHE WAS MESSING
WITH ME LIKE SHE ALWAYS DOES,

BUT SHE'S RIGHT. I MEAN
IT MAKES TOTAL SENSE.

WHAT DOES?

GOOD GRADES AREN'T ENOUGH.

I NEED TO DO THINGS.

I NEED TO VOLUNTEER, I NEED TO WORK
FOR CHARITY, HELP THE BLIND, THE ORPHANS.

I DON'T KNOW, I JUST
NEED TO DO SOMETHING.

FINE, WHAT DOES THIS
HAVE TO DO WITH TONIGHT?

I NEED TO START NOW.

NOW? YOU HAVE TO HELP THE
BLIND AND THE... THE ORPHANS NOW?

DIDN'T I TELL YOU I
WAS 10 YEARS BEHIND?

YOU CAN'T MAKE UP FOR 10
YEARS IN ONE NIGHT, RORY.

I KNOW. I... I JUST NEED
TO GET ORGANIZED.

RORY, IT'S SUMMER.

I MEAN SUMMER'S THE TIME
TO HANG OUT AND KICK BACK.

I CAN'T HANG OUT OR KICK BACK.

I NEED TO FIND A RETARDED KID AND
TEACH HIM HOW TO PLAY SOFTBALL.

OH, GOD! LISTEN TO ME.

I AM HORRIBLE.
UNDER-QUALIFIED AND HORRIBLE.

I THOUGHT WE'RE GONNA
SPEND SOME TIME TOGETHER.

WE ARE. WHEN?

I DON'T KNOW. TOMORROW, MAYBE.

YOU WERE BUSY TODAY, SO
WE MADE PLANS FOR TONIGHT.

NOW YOU'RE BLOWING ME OFF AGAIN.

I'M NOT BLOWING YOU OFF.

YOU'LL GO TO SUMMER
SCHOOL 3 DAYS A WEEK.

YOU KNEW ABOUT THAT.

YES, WE'VE BEEN
APART FOR A WHILE NOW.

I FIGURED YOU
WANTED TIME WITH ME.

DEAN, THIS IS ABOUT HARVARD.

OH, WELL, EXCUSE ME, IT'S
ABOUT HARVARD. I FORGOT.

OK, FINE.

YOU'RE MAD? YOU'RE MAD
BECAUSE I WANT TO BE SURE

THAT I GET INTO A GOOD COLLEGE?

NO, I'M MAD BECAUSE MY GIRLFRIEND
DOESN'T HAVE TIME FOR ME ANYMORE.

DEAN, STOP IT.
THIS IS IMPORTANT.

AND IT CAN'T WAIT FOR ONE NIGHT?

NO. FINE.

WHY ARE YOU ACTING LIKE THIS?

LIKE WHAT? LIKE YOU'RE 2?

HEY, I'M NOT GOING TO HARVARD.

I COULDN'T CARE
LESS ABOUT HARVARD.

I JUST WANTED TO HANG WITH YOU.

BUT RELAX. SINCE,
APPARENTLY, I'M 2,

MAYBE I'LL JUST GROW OUT OF IT.

I'M JUST TOO TIRED
TO GO OUT TONIGHT,

SO I WON'T TRUST MY
ACCESSORIZING INSTINCTS.

TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK.

I HAVE NO WILDERNESS
SKILLS. SO YOU HATE THE PURSE?

HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET INTO
HARVARD IF I HAVE NO WILDERNESS SKILLS?

I DON'T KNOW, HONEY.

YOU'LL HAVE TO GIVE UP YOUR
DREAM OF MAJORING IN LOGGING.

I CALLED THE FIREFLIES. DO
THEY NEED TROOP LEADERS? YES.

"GOOD. I'LL BE A
TROOP LEADER. GREAT"

THE ONLY CATCH IS IT'S
SUMMER, CAMPING SEASON.

I NEED WILDERNESS SKILLS.

WHY DID YOU NEVER
TAKE ME CAMPING?

CAMPING? ARE YOU KIDDING?

I COULDN'T GET YOU TO STEP
ON WET GRASS UNTIL YOU WERE 3.

IF YOU'D TAKEN ME CAMPING,
I'D HAVE WILDERNESS SKILLS.

I'LL TELL YOU WHAT, I'LL TAKE YOU
UPSTAIRS AND THROW YOU OUT THE WINDOW.

IF YOU CAN GRAB THE
TREE, I'LL BE YOUR WITNESS.

I CALLED THE SUNNYSIDE HOME.
"DO THEY NEED VOLUNTEERS?"

THEY DON'T, BUT THEY DO
NEED AN ACCORDION PLAYER

FOR THEIR FRIDAY
NIGHT POLKA PARTY.

HOW COME I NEVER FORCED
YOU TO LEARN THE ACCORDION?

THE LIBRARY WAS CLOSED. I
CAN CALL THEM TOMORROW,

BUT THEY ONLY HAVE 12 BOOKS,
SO I'M NOT COUNTING ON THAT.

IF THE TUTORING
PROGRAM AT CHILTON

IS STILL TAKING NAMES,
I GUESS I CAN DO THAT.

HONEY, CALM DOWN.

I'M NOT PREPARED. I
WILL NEVER CATCH UP.

YOU WILL CATCH UP,
BUT NOT IN ONE NIGHT.

YOU'VE MADE YOUR
LISTS AND YOUR CALLS.

WHY DON'T YOU RELAX,
CALL DEAN TO COME OVER?

WE'RE IN A FIGHT. WHY?

BECAUSE YOU NEVER
TOOK ME CAMPING.

OH, BOY, I'M REALLY
SUCKING TONIGHT.

WE WERE SUPPOSED TO HANG
OUT, I TOLD HIM I COULDN'T.

HE GOT MAD, AND
WE'RE IN A FIGHT.

OH.

WELL, LISTEN, WHY DON'T I
CANCEL ON MAX TONIGHT?

AND I'LL HANG OUT HERE WITH
YOU, WE CAN MAKE POPCORN,

AND REMINISCE ABOUT HOW I NEVER
FORCED YOU TO BECOME A MISSIONARY.

NO, GO. I'M FINE.

I JUST NEED TO FOCUS ON THIS.

I CAN HELP.

NO, I NEED TO DO THIS ALONE.

ARE YOU SURE? I'M SURE.

OK.

I'M NOT GOING TO BE HOME LATE.

AND LISTEN, I WOULD
RECONSIDER CALLING DEAN.

IT'S NOT HIS FAULT THAT
YOU'RE SO FABULOUS,

HE CAN'T THINK
ABOUT ANYTHING ELSE.

BYE, MOM.

I MEAN, HE JUST SITS IN HIS ROOM,
EATING FROOT LOOPS OUT OF THE BOX,

SAYING YOUR NAME OVER AND OVER.

TIME IS TICKING.

"RORY, I LOVE YOU, RORY.
RORY, I WILL NOT BE IGNORED."

LEAVE. OK.

I'LL BE HOME EARLY. BYE.

[people chattering]

YOU HATE YOUR DINNER.

NO, I DON'T. YOU'VE
HARDLY TOUCHED IT.

WELL, WHEN SOMEBODY
GOES TO THE TROUBLE

TO MAKE YOUR ENTREE LOOK
LIKE A LITTLE TINY HAT, IT'S...

YOU HATE TO MESS IT UP.

IS SOMETHING WRONG? NO.

YOU CAN TELL ME.
THAT'S WHAT I'M HERE FOR.

I THOUGHT IT WAS
JUST FOR EYE CANDY.

THAT, TOO.

I'M FINE. IT'S JUST STUFF.

YOU KNOW, RORY'S FREAKING OUT ABOUT
NOT HAVING ENOUGH EXTRACURRICULAR THINGS

TO IMPRESS HARVARD WITH.

I CAN HELP HER WITH THAT.

I'M SURE SHE'D
GREATLY APPRECIATE IT.

IS THAT ALL THAT'S WRONG?

YEAH.

IT'S JUST A LOT OF STUFF TO THINK
ABOUT, YOU KNOW, FOR THE WEDDING.

UM, I... I FORGOT TO TELL YOU.

I SAW MY PARENTS TODAY.

THEY JUST WANTED ME TO TELL
YOU HOW THRILLED THEY ARE.

MY MOTHER CRIED TWICE. SHE SAID
YOU DON'T HAVE TO CALL HER "MOM."

BUT YOU'RE WELCOME
TO IF YOU WANT.

REALLY?

AND THEN MY FATHER TOOK ME ASIDE
AND GAVE ME A LONG TALK ABOUT MARRIAGE

AND THE MANY WAYS
OF MAKING A WIFE HAPPY.

OOH, DIRTY TALK.

THEN THEY GAVE ME THIS.

NO, THEY DID NOT.

YES, THEY DID, TOO.

OH, DID YOU TELL THEM THAT WE'RE
PAYING FOR EVERYTHING OURSELVES?

I DID.

SOOKIE'S DOING THE CAKE,
THE CEREMONY'S AT MY HOUSE,

PATTY'S SUPPLYING CHAIRS...

$35?

IT'S THE FIRST OF
4 INSTALLMENTS,

THAT WAY WE CAN'T
SPEND IT ALL IN ONE PLACE.

OH, THAT IS SO CUTE.

THEY JUST WANT TO BE INVOLVED.

THAT'S SWEET, THAT'S
REALLY SWEET. CAN I... THANKS.

OH, MY MOTHER EVEN OFFERED
YOU HER WEDDING DRESS.

BUT SINCE 3 OF YOU
COULD FIT INTO THAT DRESS,

I TOOK THE LIBERTY
OF DECLINING IT.

UH, HOPE SHE WASN'T INSULTED.

NO, I JUST TOLD HER YOU WERE
WEARING YOUR MOTHER'S DRESS.

AH!

IT DOESN'T MATTER
WHETHER YOU ARE OR NOT.

SHE JUST WANTED
TO OFFER SOMETHING.

LET'S GET DESSERT.

ARE YOU OK? I JUST
THINK IT'S GREAT.

I THINK IT'S GREAT THAT YOUR PARENTS
ARE SO HAPPY AND INTO EVERYTHING.

THAT MUST BE NICE TO HAVE THAT.

WELL, WHY DON'T YOU THINK
OF IT THIS WAY: NOW THEY'RE

KINDA YOUR PARENTS, TOO.
SO YOU'LL HAVE THAT, ALSO.

YES, I WILL THINK
OF IT LIKE THAT.

THAT IS EXACTLY
HOW I WILL THINK OF IT.

GOOD. BECAUSE OTHERWISE,

I'D HAVE TO LOOK AT IT LIKE,
"MAX HAS PARENTS WHO LOVE HIM

AND CARE ABOUT HIM,
AND I HAVE PARENTS."

I DIDN'T MEAN TO UPSET YOU.

I'M NOT UPSET.

IT'S JUST THAT I CAN'T GET THAT
ONE MOMENT OUT OF MY MIND.

"THAT'S NICE. I HOPE
WE'RE IN TOWN."

WHO... WHO... WHO
REACTS LIKE THAT?

I MEAN WHAT SORT OF MIND
FORMS THAT REACTION TO:

"HEY, MOM, I'M GETTING MARRIED"?

WELL, FROM EVERYTHING YOU'VE
TOLD ME ABOUT YOUR PARENTS,

THERE'S SO MUCH BAGGAGE
BETWEEN YOU GUYS.

YOU FIGURE OUT A DIFFERENT WAY.

Y-YOU TAP INTO COMPASSION OR,
UH, FAMILY OBLIGATION OR SOMETHING.

YOU DON'T REACT LIKE THAT.

I AGREE. IT'S WRONG.

BUT YOU CAN'T
CHANGE WHO THEY ARE.

YOU WON'T GET
ANYWHERE TRYING TO.

OK, I DON'T WANT TO TALK
ABOUT MY PARENTS ANYMORE.

OK? I DON'T WANT TO
SPECULATE ABOUT THEM

OR ANALYZE THEM OR THINK
ABOUT THEM. WE SHOULD GO.

COME ON, IT'S STILL EARLY.

WELL, WE'LL GO SOMEPLACE ELSE.

TALK A LITTLE BIT MORE?

YES. ABSOLUTELY. SOUNDS GOOD.

LISTEN. I'M SORRY
TONIGHT BROUGHT UP

ALL THESE BAD FEELINGS FOR YOU.

THAT'S OK. MAKE A RIGHT.

BUT I BET THIS WAS HARDER FOR
YOUR MOTHER THAN YOU THINK IT IS.

UH-HUH.

LOOK WHAT'S HAPPENED
TO HER OVER THE LAST YEAR.

SHE'S JUST GETTING
BACK INTO YOUR LIFE,

AND SUDDENLY EVERYTHING
CHANGES ON HER.

YEAH, THAT'S GOT
TO SUCK. GO RIGHT.

[sighs]

YOU KNOW, MAYBE ONCE WE GET
MARRIED, THINGS WILL SETTLE DOWN.

YOU TWO WILL BE
ABLE TO WORK IT OUT.

I MEAN, YOU NEVER KNOW.

UH, I MIGHT BE ABLE
TO HELP THE SITUATION.

YOU KNOW, ACT AS A BUFFER OR SO.

THAT'S A GOOD THOUGHT. GOOD
THOUGHT. PULL... PULL IN HERE.

LORELAI, HOLD ON.

I THINK I KNOW
WHAT'S GOING ON HERE.

AND I GOTTA TELL YOU,
IT'S NOT A GOOD IDEA.

[doorbell ringing] THIS
WILL TAKE A SECOND.

MAYBE YOU SHOULD WAIT UNTIL
TOMORROW. CALM DOWN A LITTLE.

MAYBE YOU'LL BE MORE OBJECTIVE.

YOU ARE NOT ASLEEP. COME ON.

YOU ARE WAY TOO
EMOTIONAL FOR THIS.

NO, I'M JUST EMOTIONAL ENOUGH.

NOW, IF YOU LIKE, YOU
CAN WAIT IN THE CAR

BECAUSE I REALLY DON'T
PLAN ON BEING HERE THAT LONG.

WHAT ON EARTH...

HI, MOM.

DO YOU HAVE A SEC
TO CHAT? SUPER.

LORELAI, WHAT IS THIS?

I JUST WANTED TO SEE
HOW YOU WERE. THAT'S ALL.

I'M FINE.

YOU ARE? OH, GOOD. GOOD.

I'M GLAD THAT YOU'RE FINE.
I, HOWEVER, AM NOT FINE.

WE WERE JUST ABOUT TO GO TO
BED. WE CAN DO THIS IN THE MORNING.

ACTUALLY, MOM, NO.

WE CAN'T DO THIS IN THE MORNING.
WE NEED TO DO THIS RIGHT NOW.

ARE YOU DRUNK?

NO, I'M NOT DRUNK. I'M CONFUSED.

ABOUT WHAT? ABOUT YOU.

AND WHAT ABOUT ME CONFUSES YOU?

WELL, SO MANY THINGS.

I MEAN, FOR EXAMPLE, WHY CAN'T
YOU KEEP A MAID IN THIS HOUSE?

I MEAN, THERE MUST HAVE BEEN A
THOUSAND WOMEN WHO GONE THROUGH HERE

IN THE 32 YEARS
THAT I'VE BEEN ALIVE.

AND NOT ONE OF THEM
COULD STICK IT OUT.

AND THIS IS WHAT WE NEED
TO DISCUSS RIGHT NOW?

THESE ARE WOMEN FROM
COUNTRIES THAT HAVE

DICTATORSHIPS, AND CIVIL
WARS, AND DEATH SQUADS.

AND ALL OF THAT, THEY SURVIVED.

BUT 5 MINUTES WORKING
FOR EMILY GILMORE,

AND PEOPLE ARE
BEGGING FOR CASTRO.

ALL RIGHT, I'M GOING TO BED NOW.

WHY IS IT THAT WHEN
YOUR ONLY DAUGHTER

TELLS YOU THAT SHE
IS GETTING MARRIED,

YOU CAN'T MUSTER UP
EVEN A LITTLE ENTHUSIASM?

EVEN A LITTLE FAKE ENTHUSIASM?

WHY DON'T YOU
PRETEND THAT YOU CARE?

I MEAN THIS IS THE BIGGEST
THING TO HAPPEN TO ME,

POSSIBLY FOR THE
REST OF MY LIFE.

AND YOU DISMISSED
IT, LIKE I SAID:

"HEY, I'M THINKING OF GETTING
A HONDA. WHAT DO YOU THINK?"

YOU'RE OBVIOUSLY HYSTERICAL.

WHY DON'T YOU CARE?

WHY HAVE YOU NEVER CARED?

NO MATTER WHAT HAS
HAPPENED TO ME MY ENTIRE LIFE,

YOU'VE NEVER BEEN HAPPY FOR ME.

AND THAT HURTS,
MOM. IT REALLY HURTS.

I'M NOT DISCUSSING
THIS WITH YOU.

DO YOU KNOW HOW IT FELT FOR ME

TO TELL YOU THAT I
WAS GETTING MARRIED

AND TO HAVE YOU JUST
BRUSH IT OFF LIKE THAT?

DO YOU KNOW?

NO, I DON'T. I DON'T KNOW!

POSSIBLY VERY SIMILAR TO FINDING
OUT FROM A COMPLETE STRANGER

MY ONLY DAUGHTER
WAS GETTING MARRIED

AND HAD TOLD EVERY
OTHER PERSON IN THE WORLD

BEFORE SHE BOTHERED
TO TELL HER OWN MOTHER!

POSSIBLY IT FELT
SOMETHING LIKE THAT.

NOW IF YOU WILL EXCUSE ME, IT
IS LATE AND I AM GOING TO BED.

UM, MY PARENTS WOULD
REALLY LIKE TO HAVE LUNCH

WITH YOU AND MR. GILMORE
SOMETIME SOON.

NICE MEETING YOU.

I DON'T CARE.

I JUST NEED A QUICK OPINION.

IT TOOK ME 2 SECONDS TO TELL YOU

I DON'T CARE. THAT'S
AS QUICK AS I GET.

THIS IS LORELAI'S
ENGAGEMENT PARTY.

IT'S A ONCE-IN-A-LIFETIME EVENT.

AND I WANT IT TO BE PERFECT.

I AM WORKING.

JUST PICK A COOKIE!

I DON'T WANT TO.

MICHEL, FOR THE
REST OF THEIR LIVES

LORELAI AND MAX ARE GOING TO THINK
BACK ON THEIR ENGAGEMENT PARTY.

AND THEY'RE GOING
TO TALK ABOUT 3 THINGS:

THE FRIENDS WHO CAME, THE
SPECIAL SONG THEY DANCED TO,

AND THE COOKIES THAT THEY ATE.

THEIR WORLD IS
VERY SMALL, ISN'T IT?

MACAROONS OR CHOCOLATE PRALINE?

GO BACK TO THE COOKING ROOM.

NOT UNTIL YOU EAT THESE
AND TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK.

SOOKIE, I ONLY EAT
1,500 CALORIES A DAY.

IF I EAT THAT, I CANNOT
HAVE MY BOCA BURGER LATER.

HEY, SOOKIE. IS THERE
ANY COFFEE LEFT?

I HAD A REALLY LOUSY NIGHT.

OH, SORRY.

YOU KNOW, I'VE BEEN SO BUSY,
I DIDN'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT.

OH, THAT'S OK. I'LL
MAKE SOME MYSELF.

NO, I'LL MAKE IT! I'LL MAKE IT! I
WANT TO MAKE IT! I WANT TO MAKE IT!

LET ME DO IT. I WANT TO MAKE IT!

I'LL MAKE THE COFFEE.

RELAX. YOU'RE BUSY.

NO, I'M NOT. GO BACK TO THE
COUNTER. MICHEL'S STEALING.

OH, MY GOD.

WHAT IS THIS?

UH, THE DINNER SPECIAL.

THE DINNER SPECIAL IS
A HEART-SHAPED PASTRY

WITH "MAX AND
LORELAI" WRITTEN ON IT?

I COULDN'T FIND ANY GOOD SALMON.

OH, SOOKIE, YOU'RE THROWING ME
A WEDDING SHOWER, AREN'T YOU?

IT WAS SUPPOSED
TO BE A SURPRISE.

OH, MY GOD!

THIS IS AMAZING,
SOOKIE, EVEN FOR YOU!

WAIT TILL YOU SEE
THE ICE SCULPTURES.

WHEN IS IT?

TONIGHT.

OH! SO YOUR YEN TO HIT THE
BINGO PARLOR IN ENFIELD WAS...

A VICIOUS, VICIOUS LIE.

THIS IS INCREDIBLE. THIS IS
REALLY, REALLY INCREDIBLE.

MY GOD! IS THERE ANY PINK
ICING LEFT ON THE PLANET?

THE WHOLE TOWN
IS IN ON IT ACTUALLY.

IT'S GOING TO BE
QUITE THE AFFAIR.

AND YOU'LL BE
SUFFICIENTLY IMPRESSED

WITH THE AMOUNT OF PEOPLE
THAT WANT TO CELEBRATE WITH YOU.

MICHEL? NO.

RIGHT. I... I... I JUST... I
CAN'T GET OVER THIS.

OH.

HEY, YOU DIDN'T, BY ANY CHANCE,
INVITE MY PARENTS, DID YOU?

ACTUALLY, I DID. AT
FIRST, I WAS REALLY TORN,

BECAUSE I KNOW YOU
HAVE ISSUES WITH THEM.

BUT IT IS YOUR WEDDING, AND I
ASSUMED YOU WANTED THEM TO BE THERE.

OH, NO. YOUR MOTHER TOLD YOU.

S-SORT OF.

DAMN! I THOUGHT I MENTIONED
THAT IT WAS A SURPRISE.

I DON'T KNOW. MAYBE I DIDN'T.

THAT WOULD BE SO TYPICAL OF ME.

OH, THE CAT'S ALREADY
OUT OF THE BAG.

AND I'M STUFFING IMPORTED
CHOCOLATE SQUARES DOWN MY SHIRT,

SO YOU DON'T SEE ME WALK
INTO THE KITCHEN WITH THEM.

HAY, DID YOUR MOTHER
MENTION IF THEY WERE COMING?

SHE NEVER GOT BACK TO ME.

OH, NO, UM, SHE'S
GOT A THING TONIGHT.

OH, TOO BAD.

HEY, WE CAN SAVE
HER A PIECE OF CAKE.

THAT WOULD BE NICE.

♪ [Spring Released by
Grant-Lee Phillips playing]

♪ DAMN, THIS FLOOR IS THUMPIN' ♪

♪ SPRING RELEASED AND ♪

♪ MY LITTLE GIRLFRIEND'S
HANGING LIGHT ♪

ATTENTION, GUESTS, THE BUFFET
LINE IS CLOGGING IN SECTOR "B."

I REPEAT, SECTOR "B"
IS MOVING TOO SLOW.

KEEP IT MOVING, PEOPLE.

HEY, MR. D.J., PUT A RECORD ON.

HOW'S IT SOUND? GREAT.

I'M TRYING TO FIND
THAT SUBTLE BLEND

BETWEEN NOT TOO
CLICHE-SOUNDING TRADITIONAL TUNES

WITH OUTER-LEFT-FIELD,
SHOULD-BE STANDARDS.

WELL, THE SINATRA
MEDLEY WAS GREAT.

AND MAYBE SKIP ANYTHING
ELSE BY THE DAMNED.

RIGHT. WHAT TIME IS IT?

IT'S 8:00.

WHAT TIME DO YOU LEAVE?

I HAVE A 10:00 FLIGHT.

HAVE I TOLD YOU I'M
GOING TO MISS YOU?

WRITE ME, CONSTANTLY.

EVERY DAY.

CARDS AND LETTERS, FULL
OF HOPE AND "SEE YOU SOON."

I'LL BE TYING YELLOW RIBBONS
AROUND THE OLD OAK TREES.

I WILL BE BACK FOR THE WEDDING.

YOU BETTER BE.

JUST DON'T LET HER
CHANGE THE DATE.

NOT GOING TO HAPPEN. MAX
IS TEACHING A SUMMER COURSE

AT THE UNIVERSITY OF TORONTO.

SO IF YOU'RE BACK BY
SUMMER'S END, IT WILL BE FINE.

DON'T SAY "IF."

RIGHT.

[Lorelai laughing]

I DON'T KNOW IF YOU REALIZE THAT
EVERY GIFT SO FAR HAS BEEN FOR YOU.

YES, WELL, IN THIS
TOWN, I AM THE QUEEN.

YOU ARE SIMPLY MY JESTER.

A POSITION I HAPPILY ACCEPT.

OH, COME ON, THEN.

HOW CAN YOU STAND TO
LEAVE ALL THIS FOR 2 MONTHS?

YOU THINK TORONTO IS GOING TO
MAKE YOU INTO AN ICE SCULPTURE?

I DON'T THINK SO.

I WISH YOU'D COME WITH ME.

I HAVE TO WORK.

2 MONTHS IS A LONG TIME.

I KNOW.

WILL YOU STILL WANT
ME WHEN I GET BACK?

I THINK THERE'S A
VERY GOOD POSSIBILITY

THAT I WILL BE JUST AS INFATUATED
WITH YOU THEN AS I AM NOW.

MAYBE MORE.

MAYBE MORE.

♪ I FEEL THE BLOOD
RUSH, PUMPIN', HAULIN' ♪

OH, COME ON, LADIES. HURRY UP.

LOVE WAITS FOR NO ONE.

LUCY, GET OFF OF JENNY'S TRAIN.

ALL RIGHT, BOUQUETS UP.

AND MUSIC.

♪ [One Fine Day by
Carole King playing]

♪ LOVE ♪

HOW COME YOU'RE
NOT UP THERE, KIRK?

OH, I DON'T TAP
ANYMORE. BUM KNEES.

OH.

HAVE TO TELL YOU I'M A LITTLE
WORRIED ABOUT THIS GAZEBO

HOLDING UP ALL THOSE HOOFERS.

THEY NEVER DID A TRIAL
RUN, LIKE I REQUESTED.

OH, I THINK IT'S OK.

THE STUDS ARE DEFINITELY SOUND,

THE 2-BY-4s ARE A NICE
NUMBER 2 STRUCTURAL GRADE.

OR BETTER, POSSIBLY.

I BUILT A HOUSE YESTERDAY.

OH, FOR PETE'S SAKE.

NO TOSSING OF THE
JORDAN ALMONDS.

I REPEAT, PUT THE ALMONDS DOWN.

(Dean) HEY.

HEY.

THIS IS QUITE A PARTY.

ELEGANT AND UNDERSTATED,
JUST LIKE MY MOTHER.

SO, UH, HOW ARE YOU?

I'M FINE. HOW ARE YOU?

ME? OH.

I'M AN IDIOT.

NO, YOU'RE NOT.

I'M SO SORRY, RORY.

I'M SORRY, TOO.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED.

WE HAD A FIGHT, THAT'S ALL.

I MEAN, I'VE JUST
MISSED YOU AND...

I MISSED YOU, TOO.

I GOT... I DON'T KNOW, I GOT JEALOUS OF
HARVARD FOR A MINUTE, WHICH IS CRAZY

'CAUSE I LOVE THE FACT THAT
YOU'RE GONNA GO TO HARVARD.

AND THEN YOU HAVE TO DO SOMETHING
THAT'S GOING TO HELP YOU GET THERE AND I...

I DON'T EVEN... I DON'T EVEN
REALLY UNDERSTAND IT MYSELF.

I DIDN'T HELP.

I WAS ALL WIGGED
OUT WHEN I GOT HOME.

WELL, YOU HAD ALL
THE RIGHT TO BE.

IT'S THAT WHEN IT
COMES TO HARVARD,

SOMETIMES I GET A
LITTLE TUNNEL VISION.

AND IT'S GETTING CLOSER AND I...

YOU DO NOT HAVE TO EXPLAIN.

BUT I DON'T WANT YOU
TO FEEL UNIMPORTANT,

BECAUSE, BELIEVE ME, YOU'RE NOT.

I'M GLAD.

I MEAN IT. YOU COULD ONLY
BE MORE IMPORTANT TO ME

IF YOU HAD A KIT KAT
GROWING OUT OF YOUR HEAD.

WELL, I CAN'T MAKE
PROMISES, BUT I'LL GIVE IT A TRY.

I'M SORRY. DON'T BE.

I MEAN, I'M NOT GOING
TO A FANCY SCHOOL.

I DON'T HAVE THAT
KIND OF PRESSURE.

I CAN'T EVEN IMAGINE
WHAT THAT MUST FEEL LIKE.

YOU COULD GO TO A FANCY
SCHOOL IF YOU WANTED TO.

I DON'T THINK SO.

WHY NOT? YOU'RE SMART.

NO, YOU'RE SMART. YOU ARE, TOO.

RORY... AND I COULD HELP YOU

ORGANIZE YOUR ALL OF YOUR
EXTRACURRICULAR ACTIVITIES

BECAUSE I'M NOW AN EXPERT AT IT.

I DON'T... HOW ARE YOUR
WILDERNESS SKILLS?

HEY.

WHAT?

DO YOU ACCEPT MY APOLOGY?

YEAH, I ACCEPT YOUR APOLOGY.

♪ AND YOU WILL KNOW OUR
LOVE WAS MEANT TO BE ♪

♪ ONE FINE DAY ♪

♪ YOU'RE GONNA WANT
ME FOR YOUR GIRL ♪

♪ SHOO-BE DO-BE DO-BE
DO-BE DOO-WOP-WOP ♪

♪ SHOO-BE DO-BE DO-BE
DO-BE DOO-WOP-WOP ♪

♪ THE ARMS ♪

YOU OK?

YEAH.

♪ WILL OPEN WIDE ♪

♪ AND YOU'LL BE PROUD ♪

YOU KNOW, I'LL JUST, UM,

I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

ONLY 3 TREATS PER PERSON.
NO HOGGING OF THE TREATS.

IF CAUGHT WITH MORE
THAN 3 TREATS ON A PLATE,

YOU WILL BE FACED WITH POSSIBLE
EXPULSION FROM SAID PARTY.

HEY, KIRK, COULD I
SEE THAT FOR A SEC?

OH, SURE.

THANKS.

♪ WHO ONLY WANTS TO RUN AROUND ♪

♪ I'LL BE WAITING, AND
SOMEDAY, DARLING ♪

HEY.

HEY. WHY AREN'T
YOU AT YOUR PARTY?

THAT'S FUNNY, I WAS ABOUT
TO ASK YOU THE SAME THING.

OH, WELL, I JUST GOT
KIND OF BUSY HERE.

OH, YES, I CAN SEE THAT.

BOY, THEY KEEP MAKING THAT
KETCHUP SLOWER AND SLOWER, HUH?

IT'S THE HEINZ
FAMILY'S LITTLE JOKE.

WELL, IT'S REALLY
PRETTY CRAZY OUT THERE.

OH, I CAN IMAGINE.

LOTS OF PEOPLE ALL HAVING FUN.

JUST THE KIND OF
THING YOU'D HATE.

SOUNDS AWFUL.

YOU WOULD BE MISERABLE.

OH, YES, I WOULD.

IN SPITE OF ALL THAT,

I WAS KIND OF THINKING,
AND YOU DON'T HAVE TO,

THAT MAYBE YOU COULD PULL
YOURSELF AWAY FOR A SECOND.

YEAH, WELL...

I MEAN, YOU KNOW, FINISH
THE KETCHUP TONIGHT,

BUT MAYBE LEAVE THE
WORCESTERSHIRE SAUCE FOR TOMORROW.

I'LL SEE HOW IT GOES.

OK.

I MEAN, IT'S JUST...

IT'S A REALLY BIG
NIGHT FOR ME TONIGHT,

AND I DON'T KNOW, IT FEELS
LIKE YOU SHOULD BE THERE.

ANYWAY, I'LL LET YOU GET
BACK TO YOUR KETCHUP.

[door opening]

[door closing]

THE MACAROONS ARE
GOING LIKE HOT CAKES.

YEAH, EVERYTHING'S
A BIG SUCCESS.

LOOK AT ALL THIS.
ISN'T IT BEAUTIFUL?

I KNOW IT'S CLICHED,
BUT IT IS SO ROMANTIC.

IT MAKES YOU ALL GIDDY IN A
SAPPY KIND OF WAY, DOESN'T IT?

UH, SURE, I GUESS.

I HOPE THEY'RE HAPPY.

OH, WHAT AM I SAYING?

HOW COULD THEY NOT BE HAPPY?

THEY'RE IN LOVE.
THEY HAVE EACH OTHER.

AND EVERYTHING'S PERFECT!

OK, I GET IT.

JACKSON, WHAT ARE YOU...

WHAT DO YOU THINK? I NEED
A PIANO TO FALL ON MY HEAD?

I DON'T THINK ANYONE ACTUALLY
NEEDS A PIANO TO FALL ON THEIR HEAD.

ALL THE MARRIAGE TALK,

AND THE "OH, JACKSON,
YOU SHOULD SEE

LORELAI'S RING.
IT'S SO BEAUTIFUL."

WELL, IT IS.

I UNDERSTAND. I'M HIP, OK?

WE'VE HIT THAT POINT IN OUR RELATIONSHIP
WHERE THE HINTS ARE STARTING,

WHICH MEANS THAT WILL BE FOLLOWED
BY THE WHERE-ARE-WE-GOING TALK.

THAT'LL ONLY END
IN BIG ULTIMATUMS.

SUDDENLY ALL HELL BREAKS LOOSE!

OK, NO MORE SUGAR FOR YOU.

SO I THINK I NEED TO
SAY THIS RIGHT NOW.

I'M NOT READY FOR MARRIAGE.

OK.

HOWEVER, I'D BE
WILLING TO MOVE IN.

MOVE IN WHERE?

MOVE IN WITH YOU.

JACKSON, YOU'RE HILARIOUS.

I AM?

"I'LL MOVE IN WITH
YOU." WHAT A RIOT!

WHY ARE YOU LAUGHING?

YOUR FACE.

GOD, YOU'RE GOOD, YOU ARE GOOD!

I WASN'T JOKING.

[laughing]

COME ON, LET'S GO
GET SOME PUNCH.

SOOKIE, I'M SERIOUS.
I'M MOVIN' IN.

JACKSON, STOP. YOU'RE
GIVING ME A CRAMP.

SOOKIE, GET BACK HERE.

♪ LOVE IS EVERYWHERE I GO ♪

♪ LOOKING THROUGH YOU ♪

♪ BURNING LIGHT
INSIDE MY DREAMS ♪

♪ I WAKE UP IN THE DARK ♪

♪ THE LIGHT IS OUTSIDE MY DOOR ♪

♪ LOVE IS EVERYWHERE I GO ♪

♪ LOOKING THROUGH YOU ♪

♪ LOVE IS EVERYWHERE I GO ♪

♪ LOOKING THROUGH YOU ♪

♪ LOVE IS EVERYWHERE I GO ♪

♪ LOOKING THROUGH YOU ♪

♪ CHASING EVERY FRAGMENT I SEE ♪

♪ LOOKING THROUGH YOU ♪

♪ LOVE IS LOOKING FOR ME ♪

♪ BREAKING OPEN THE CLOUDS ♪

♪ I'M NOT STRANDED IN TIME ♪

♪ LOVE IS EVERYWHERE I GO ♪

♪ LOOKING THROUGH YOU ♪

♪ LOVE IS EVERYWHERE I GO ♪

♪ LOOKING THROUGH YOU ♪

♪ LOVE IS EVERYWHERE I GO ♪

♪ LOOKING THROUGH YOU ♪

[doorbell rings]

MARINA, THE DOOR, PLEASE.

(Lorelai) HEY.

OH, THANKS.

HEY, MOM.

I WAS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD BECAUSE
THERE'S THAT WEDDING DRESS PLACE ON WILLOW.

ELIZABETH TAYLOR BOUGHT
ONE OF HER DRESSES THERE.

ANYHOW, I WAS TRYING TO
MAKE A DECISION ABOUT A VEIL.

AND I THOUGHT MAYBE YOU
MIGHT HAVE SOME OPINION

ABOUT WHICH ONE
WOULD LOOK BEST ON ME

'CAUSE, WELL, YOU
KNOW ME. SO, UM,

I THOUGHT I'D STOP
BY AND ASK YOU

WHICH ONE YOU
THOUGHT WOULD BE GOOD.

ON ME.

SO W-WHICH ONE?

YOU'RE QUITE CAPABLE OF
CHOOSING THAT YOURSELF, LORELAI.

[sighs]

I'M SORRY.

ALL RIGHT, YOU'RE SORRY.

I DON'T KNOW HOW TO
TELL YOU THINGS, MOM.

UM, I DON'T KNOW IF
YOU'VE NOTICED THIS OR NOT,

BUT WE DON'T
COMMUNICATE VERY WELL.

WHEN SOMETHING
GOOD HAPPENS TO ME,

I'M JUST AFRAID YOU'RE GOING
TO MAKE ME FEEL BAD ABOUT IT.

WHEN SOMETHING
BAD HAPPENS TO ME,

I'M ALWAYS AFRAID
YOU'LL SAY, "I TOLD YOU SO."

I'M... I'M NOT SURE IF
THAT'S ALWAYS FAIR.

AND I'M SURE I SHARE PART OF THE
BLAME FOR THIS CIRCLE WE GET INTO.

BUT YOU THINK YOUR WORDS
DON'T HAVE ANY EFFECT ON ME.

BUT THEY DO.

AND

I JUST DIDN'T WANT TO
FEEL BAD ABOUT THIS.

SO I WAITED.

AND I REALLY DIDN'T
MEAN TO HURT YOU.

OK, WELL,

I WILL LET YOU GET BACK
TO THAT LETTER THERE.

YOUR HEAD IS MUCH
TOO BIG FOR A VEIL.

YOU MIGHT CONSIDER A TIARA.

A TIARA?

THAT'S WHAT I WORE.

OH.

OK.

WELL, I'LL THINK ABOUT THAT.