Gilmore Girls (2000–2007): Season 1, Episode 19 - Emily in Wonderland - full transcript

Rory takes her grandmother around Stars Hollow for a day. She's horrified to see where Lorelai and Rory first lived.

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WELL, I DID WHAT YOU SAID.

I HAD IT ALL WORKED OUT AND ASKED
HIM IF HE'D LIKE TO GO TO DINNER

AT CHEZ FLEUR ON SUNDAY.

CHEZ FLEUR. VERY NICE.

HE SAID HE WOULD LOVE
TO, BUT HIS COUSIN'S IN TOWN

AND IS STAYING WITH
HIM FOR THE WEEK.

OH, WELL, THEN JUST
MAKE IT NEXT WEEK.

I CAME UP WITH ANOTHER OPTION.

WHICH IS?

THAT WE DOUBLE-DATE.

NO, I HATE BLIND DATES.

IT JUST FIGURES THAT THE
ONLY KOREAN BOY AT THIS PARTY

HAS HIS KOREAN-GIRL
RADAR TURNED ON.

HI. HI.

I'M HENRY.

I'M LANE. THIS IS
RORY AND PARIS.

THANK YOU. THANK YOU. THANK
YOU. YOU WILL NOT REGRET THIS.

LORELAI, THIS IS
MY COUSIN, RUNE.

RUNE, THIS IS LORELAI.

HI. IT'S VERY NICE TO MEET YOU.

I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU
SET ME UP WITH THAT.

WAS THE BEARDED
LADY BUSY TONIGHT?

HE SPEAKS KOREAN FLUENTLY,
HE RESPECTS HIS PARENTS.

AND HE'S ALSO REALLY CUTE, VERY
FUNNY, AND SURPRISINGLY INTERESTING.

LANE, I'M SORRY, BUT I'M TOTALLY
FAILING TO SEE THE PROBLEM HERE.

I'M FALLING FOR A GUY MY
PARENTS WOULD APPROVE OF!

HEY, TOMORROW, IF YOU HAVE TIME,

I'M PLANNING ON
DESPISING EVERYONE

WHO SAYS, "HEY, HOW'S IT GOING?"

YOU'RE ON.

HEY, HOW'S IT GOIN'?

OH, NO, THAT'S JUST TOO EASY.

RACHEL.

YOUR RACHEL?

YOU'RE RACHEL?

YEP, I'M RACHEL.

I HAVE TO GET HOME.

STAY FOR ONE MORE DANCE.

I DON'T THINK... YES.

EXCUSE ME? ONE
DANCE WOULD BE FINE.

GREAT.

PLEASE, DON'T LET
ME DRIVE YOU AWAY.

IT'S OK, YOU'RE NOT. I HAVE
TO GO SIT IN A CLOSET...

SO, WHERE'S RACHEL?

UH, SHE'S A FOUNDER'S
PARTY-PUNCH JUNKIE.

IS SHE, UH, STAYING?

I DON'T KNOW.

DO YOU WANT HER TO?

I DON'T KNOW.

GRANDMA, CAN I HAVE SOME BABY
PICTURES OF YOU AND GRANDPA?

ANY PARTICULAR REASON?

YEAH, WE'RE DOING THIS VISUAL
FAMILY-HISTORY PROJECT FOR SCHOOL.

OH, WELL, IF IT'S FOR SCHOOL, I
SUPPOSE I COULD DIG SOMETHING UP.

I NEED SOME OF MOM, TOO.

I THOUGHT WE HAD
THIS CONVERSATION.

YEAH, BUT I DON'T BELIEVE YOU.

MOTHER, TELL HER.

I DON'T HAVE BABY
PICTURES OF YOUR MOTHER.

THANK YOU.

HOW COULD YOU NOT HAVE
ANY BABY PICTURES OF MOM?

BECAUSE WHEN YOUR MOTHER WAS 7,

I FOUND HER BURNING
ALL OF HER BABY PICTURES.

WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?

I'M SURE YOU WERE A CUTE BABY.

SHE WAS. SHE WAS VERY CUTE.

4, 3, 2, 1.

IN MOST RESPECTS.

THEN WE HAVE LIFT OFF.

WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? NOTHING.

I DON'T SEE WHAT THE PROBLEM
IS. YOU CERTAINLY GREW INTO IT.

GROWN INTO WHAT?

AS A CHILD, YOUR MOTHER
HAD AN UNUSUALLY LARGE HEAD.

THE BEST THING ABOUT IT WAS
SHE'D TELL ME CONSTANTLY.

MY FIRST COMPLETE SENTENCE
WAS, "BIG HEAD WANT DOLLY."

I CAN'T IMAGINE
IT BEING THAT BAD.

IT WASN'T.

IT JUST AFFECTED HER
BALANCE A LITTLE, SO...

OK, CAN WE TALK ABOUT SOMETHING
BESIDES MY FORMERLY HUGE HEAD?

ARE THESE NEW CHAIRS, GRANDMA?

WHY, YES, RORY, THEY ARE.

THEY ARE?

I GOT THEM FROM A DEALER
IN MAINE LAST SUMMER.

HE JUST FINISHED RESTORING THEM.

THEY LOOK EXACTLY
LIKE THE OLD ONES.

THEY'RE NICE. SURE THEY'RE NEW?

OF COURSE I'M
SURE. I BOUGHT THEM.

I DON'T SEE ANY
DIFFERENCE AT ALL.

WELL, THE ARCH IN
THE BACK IS HIGHER,

AND THEY HAVE A
COMPLETELY DIFFERENT LEG.

NO DIFFERENCE.

OF COURSE I COULD ONLY GET
10, SO I'M 2 CHAIRS SHORT OF A SET.

YOU'RE TELLING ME.

DO YOU REALIZE HOW
RARE THESE CHAIRS ARE?

NO.

I'VE SEARCHED FOR
3 YEARS FOR THEM.

I'D COMBED EVERY FINE ANTIQUE
STORE ON THE EAST COAST,

AND THIS IS ALL I COULD FIND.

I BLAME PEG MOSSLEY.

PEG MOSSLEY, EVIL, EVIL WOMAN.

WHAT DID PEG MOSSLEY DO?

SHE LURED THESE 2 GERMAN
CHILDREN TO HER GINGERBREAD HOUSE,

AND THEN SHE TRIED TO EAT THEM.

PASS THE ARTICHOKES, PLEASE.

I MADE THE MISTAKE OF TELLING
PEG ALL MY FAVORITE SPECIAL SPOTS,

AND THAT WOMAN MOVED IN
AND COMPLETELY WIPED THEM OUT.

YOU CAN'T FIND A DECENT BIEDERMEIER
HUTCH IN ALL OF CONNECTICUT.

I'M DESPERATE FOR NEW SOURCES.

WHAT ABOUT KIM'S ANTIQUES?

WHAT'S KIM'S ANTIQUES?

DIDN'T THAT BURN DOWN?

MY BEST FRIEND LANE, HER PARENTS HAVE
THIS GREAT ANTIQUE STORE IN STARS HOLLOW.

IS THAT SO? WHY HAVEN'T
YOU EVER TOLD ME ABOUT IT?

OH, I DON'T KNOW, MOM. I GUESS
IT JUST GOT LOST IN MY BIG HEAD.

MAYBE YOU SHOULD COME TO STARS
HOLLOW AND I'LL TAKE YOU THERE.

LIKE SATURDAY. YOU
CAN COME SEE THE TOWN.

WELL, WON'T YOU HAVE TO STUDY?

I CAN PUT OFF
STUDYING FOR ONE DAY.

I'M WORKING.

NO ONE IS ASKING YOU TO DO ANYTHING,
LORELAI. THIS IS BETWEEN RORY AND ME.

I ACCEPT YOUR OFFER, RORY. I WOULD
LOVE TO SPEND SATURDAY WITH YOU.

GREAT.

WELL, I'M... I'M JUST SORRY
THAT I'M... I'M GONNA MISS IT.

EAT YOUR ARTICHOKE, LORELAI.

♪ IF YOU'RE OUT ON THE ROAD ♪

♪ FEELIN' LONELY AND SO COLD ♪

♪ ALL YOU HAVE TO
DO IS CALL MY NAME ♪

♪ AND I'LL BE THERE
ON THE NEXT TRAIN ♪

♪ WHERE YOU LEAD,
I WILL FOLLOW ♪

♪ ANYWHERE THAT YOU TELL ME TO ♪

♪ IF YOU NEED IF YOU NEED ♪

♪ YOU NEED ME TO BE WITH YOU ♪

♪ I WILL FOLLOW ♪

♪ OH ♪

♪ WHERE YOU LEAD ♪

♪ I WILL FOLLOW ♪

♪ ANYWHERE THAT YOU TELL ME TO ♪

♪ IF YOU NEED IF YOU NEED ♪

♪ YOU NEED ME TO BE WITH YOU ♪

♪ I WILL FOLLOW WHERE YOU LEAD ♪

OK, FRENCH TOAST
WITH BACON CRISPY.

PANCAKES, 2 EGGS OVER EASY.

OH.

WHAT?

YOU PUT THE EGGS ON
TOP OF THE PANCAKES.

OOPS. WHAT?

WELL, IT'S... IT'S, UH, LIKE
2 EYES STARING AT ME.

SEE, I CAN'T EAT IT LIKE THIS.

HENCE THE "OOPS."

WHAT? YOU ALWAYS
ORDER THE SAME THING.

YEAH, BUT YOU USUALLY PUT THE EGGS ON
THE SIDE SO MY BREAKFAST IS NOT OGLING ME.

IT'S THE SAME FOOD.

YEAH, I NEED THE
EGGS PUT ON THE SIDE.

YOU WANT A BRAND-NEW PLATE?

YES.

HOW ABOUT IF I TAKE
THIS PLATE IN THE BACK,

AND TAKE THE EGGS
OFF THE PANCAKES,

I PUT THE EGGS ON THE SIDE, AND BRING
THE PLATE BACK? WHAT HAPPENS THEN?

THEN I CAN EAT MY BREAKFAST.

IT'S THE SAME FOOD, JUST A
DIFFERENT CONFIGURATION.

I WON'T KNOW THAT.

I'M GONNA TAKE THE
PLATE IN THE BACK.

SO, WHAT TIME DOES THE
JUDGMENTAL EXPRESS ARRIVE?

GRANDMA GETS HERE AT NOON.

ARE YOU SURE YOU WON'T DO LUNCH?

OH, NO, I CAN'T. LUNCH IS BAD.

LORELAI, YOU'RE HERE.

GOOD. DON'T MOVE.

I... I WON'T.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING AT LUNCH?

OH, I HAVE VERY
IMPORTANT THINGS TO DO.

LIKE WHAT?

UH, WELL, AT NOON, I HAVE TO
NOT HAVE LUNCH WITH MY MOTHER.

VERY NICE.

SO I'M DEVELOPING MY PICTURES

FROM THE FIRELIGHT
FESTIVAL. SOME AMAZING STUFF.

AND I'M THINKING MAYBE
THERE'S A BOOK HERE,

FACES OF SMALL TOWN AMERICA.

AH, YOU SHOULD FEEL SAFE.

YOU DON'T LIVE
NEAR THESE PEOPLE.

EXACTLY. AND THE VERY LAST
SHOT ON MY ROLL WAS THIS.

WOW, WHEN DID YOU TAKE THIS?

WHEN YOU WEREN'T LOOKING.

WHAT'S THAT?

OH, IT'S A PICTURE OF US.

US? RACHEL TOOK IT.

FOR THE FIRELIGHT FESTIVAL.

OH, SURE. YEAH.

SO HERE'S YOUR PLATE. NO EYES.

THANK YOU.

DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?

ME? NO.

GOD, YOU'VE GOT AMAZING EYES.

DOESN'T SHE?

OH, YEAH, SURE, I GUESS.

I MEAN THEY'RE, YOU
KNOW, PLACED GOOD.

SYMMETRICAL.

I'M GONNA GET SOME MORE COFFEE.

OH, WOW, MOM, LOOK AT THIS.

WHAT IS THAT?

OH, IT'S AN OLD ABANDONED
INN I RAN ACROSS

WHEN I WAS EXPLORING
THE OTHER DAY.

THIS IS DRAGONFLY. I TOTALLY
FORGOT ABOUT THIS PLACE.

WELL, IT DOESN'T LOOK LIKE
IT'S BEEN OPERATIONAL IN YEARS.

LOOK AT ALL THE
TREES. IT'S PRETTY.

OH, I'M BUZZING.

WHAT'VE I SAID ABOUT
BUZZING IN PUBLIC?

IT'S LANE. 911, THAT'S
TRIG. GOTTA GO.

BYE.

TAKE A... YEAH.

BYE, RACHEL.

BYE.

THAT IS ONE REALLY
NOT ANNOYING KID.

YES, SHE REALLY IS NOT.

SEE, I MIGHT CONSIDER
DOING THE WHOLE MOM THING

IF I COULD BE GUARANTEED
THAT I'D GET ONE JUST LIKE HER.

OH, YOU CAN. YOU JUST
HAVE TO GO TO SEARS.

GOD! WHERE IS THIS AGAIN?

UH, IT'S KIND OF
BEHIND THE MILL.

YOU GO ACROSS A
LITTLE FOOTBRIDGE

WITH THE MEAN DUCK
FAMILY LIVING UNDER IT.

YES, THE ARMBREWSTERS.

WOW, IT'S REALLY AMAZING.

DO YOU WANT TO SEE IT? WHAT?

THE INN. I'M GONNA HEAD OUT
THAT WAY IN A LITTLE WHILE.

OH.

COME ON, FINISH YOUR
BREAKFAST. I'LL DRIVE US OUT THERE.

DRIVE HER OUT WHERE?

OH, LORELAI AND I ARE
GOING TO CRUISE THE DOCKS.

WE ARE GONNA SEE HOW
MANY SAILORS WE CAN GET

TO TATTOO OUR
NAMES ON THEIR BUTTS.

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

WELL, I HAVE TO CHECK
IN AT THE INN FIRST.

WELL, THAT'S GREAT. GOOD.
I'LL PICK YOU UP THERE.

OK. GOOD.

SO WHAT WAS THAT ALL ABOUT?

OH, NOTHING. WE'RE GONNA CHECK
OUT THIS OLD INN RACHEL FOUND.

HMM.

WHAT?

NOTHING. I DIDN'T KNOW
YOU GUYS WERE FRIENDS.

HMM, WELL, WE'RE
NOT REALLY FRIENDS.

I MEAN I DON'T KNOW
HER THAT WELL.

BUT WE'RE JUST HANGING
OUT. SHE SEEMS GREAT.

YEAH, SHE IS.
SHE'S... SHE'S GREAT.

SHE'S JUST, YOU KNOW, A
LOT DIFFERENT FROM YOU.

'CAUSE I'M NOT REALLY GREAT?

NO, YOU'RE GREAT,
JUST IN A DIFFERENT WAY.

IN A NOT REALLY GREAT WAY?

THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT.

I... I MEAN THE TWO OF YOU ARE JUST
COMPLETELY DIFFERENT PEOPLE. BOTH GREAT.

BUT I'M JUST A LITTLE SURPRISED

THAT, YOU KNOW, YOUR DIFFERENT TYPES
OF GREATNESS ARE, YOU KNOW, MELDING,

AND YOU'RE COMFORTABLY
GREAT TOGETHER.

IS THIS BOTHERING YOU?

THIS CONVERSATION, YES.

NO, UM, THE IDEA OF RACHEL
AND I HANGING OUT TOGETHER.

IS THERE, UH, SOME REASON THAT'S
WEIRD FOR YOU OR SOMETHING?

WHY WOULD IT BE?

NO REASON I CAN THINK
OF. OK, THEN IT'S NOT WEIRD.

GOOD, I WAS JUST CHECKING.

WELL, THEN YOU CHECKED.

OK. SO ARE YOU GONNA BE
POURING THAT COFFEE ANYTIME OR...

I'M GLAD IT'S NOT WEIRD, THOUGH.

THAT WOULD BE BAD.

I'LL GET A RAG.

WELCOME, MOSHIRA MOTORS,
TO THE INDEPENDENCE INN.

SO THE DINING ROOM IS
RIGHT THROUGH THERE.

AND BREAKFAST IS
SERVED 6:00 TO 11:30,

ALTHOUGH OUR CHEF IS
AN AMAZING OVERACHIEVER,

AND SHE'LL BE HAPPY TO PREPARE

ANYTHING YOU WANT
ANY TIME OF DAY.

NOW, UH, YOUR ITINERARY
FOR THE CONFERENCE

WILL BE IN EACH OF YOUR ROOMS.

AND IF YOU HAVE ANY
QUESTIONS AT ALL,

JUST PLEASE FEEL
FREE TO ASK, UH...

NO.

SOMEBODY ELSE. NOT HIM.

OK, SO ASK ROGER.

ROGER WILL BE HAPPY TO HELP YOU.

THANKS SO MUCH.

RUNE IS IN THE LOBBY.

LORELAI! HELLO! I
MADE SOME COFFEE.

RUNE IS IN THE LOBBY.

OH, I ALSO MADE THOSE LITTLE
ORANGE-GLAZED MUFFINS YOU LIKE,

WITH WARM CINNAMON BUTTER.

SOOKIE, RUNE IS IN THE LOBBY.

UH-HUH. WHY?

YOUR MUFFIN'S GETTING COLD.

MY MUFFIN'S FINE.

MY MUFFIN WANTS TO KNOW WHAT
THE FRUITCAKE'S DOING IN THE LOBBY.

HE'S STAYING WITH
JACKSON. AGAIN?

STILL.

I THOUGHT HE WAS ONLY
HERE FOR A WEEKEND.

YES, "THE LOST WEEKEND."

OK, EXPLAIN, YOKO, BECAUSE HE'S
OUT THERE WITH THE NORMAL PEOPLE,

AND HE'S GONNA SCARE THEM.

HE WON'T LEAVE.

JACKSON'S HOUSE?

YES. JACKSON'S HOUSE. HE WON'T
LEAVE, AND IT'S DRIVING ME CRAZY.

TELL JACKSON TO KICK HIM OUT.

JACKSON WON'T DO IT.

WHY NOT?

BECAUSE HE SAYS IT'S FAMILY.

AND... AND SOMEHOW HE
FEELS RESPONSIBLE FOR HIM.

WELL, OK, YES, BUT
HAS JACKSON MET HIM?

I THINK THAT WOULD
CHANGE HIS MIND.

APPARENTLY, RUNE HAD
A ROUGH CHILDHOOD.

HIS PARENTS DON'T TALK TO HIM,

HIS BROTHERS AND SISTERS DON'T
TALK TO HIM. NO ONE TALKS TO HIM.

SO THEN WHAT'S
WRONG WITH JACKSON?

I DON'T KNOW. BUT HE'S
DETERMINED TO STAND BY HIM

AND I HAVE TO
RESPECT HIS DECISION.

WELL, THAT PART I CAN
UNDERSTAND. GOOD.

BUT THE PART I CAN'T UNDERSTAND
IS, WHAT'S RUNE DOING IN THE LOBBY?

WELL, I DON'T... LORELAI!

JACKSON.

THESE ARE FOR YOU.

OH, FOR ME?

YEAH, AND I ALSO BROUGHT SOME
OF MY RASPBERRY-PEACH JAM.

I THINK YOU'RE GONNA
LIKE IT. PUT IT ON ICE CREAM.

OK.

OR TAKE A GRAHAM CRACKER, SPREAD A
LITTLE ON IT, BREAK UP A CHOCOLATE BAR,

THROW IT IN THE BROILER, AND YOU'LL
BE SINGING SHOW TUNES ALL EVENING.

MUST BE SOME GOOD JAM.

YEAH, WELL, IT'S JUST MY WAY OF
SAYING THANKS FOR HELPING OUT RUNE.

THANKS FOR HELPING OUT RUNE.

OK, I'M DOING THE SPOON SIGNAL.

OH, I DIDN'T NOTICE.

OK, I'M WAVING AROUND
LIKE AN IDIOT HERE.

SO YOU HAVEN'T... NO.

AH. YEAH.

SO I SHOULD... GOOD IDEA.

RIGHT.

UM, ENJOY THE JAM.

HMM.

WELL, UH, WOULD YOU MIND
EXPLAINING THE THANK-YOU JAM?

WELL, I WAS SUPPOSED TO ASK
YOU SOMETHING ABOUT RUNE.

LIKE WHAT?

WELL, HE JUST, NOT TOO
LONG AGO, LOST HIS JOB.

OH, ATTITUDE PROBLEMS?

SOMETHING LIKE THAT. UH-HUH.

ANYWAY, WHEN HE LOST HIS JOB,

HE COULDN'T PAY HIS RENT
AND SO THEN HE GOT EVICTED.

N-N-NONE OF THIS WAS KNOWN TO US
WHEN HE CAME TO STAY WITH JACKSON.

I MEAN, BUT THIS
IS THE SITUATION.

SO I WAS THINKING THAT IF
HE COULD GET ANOTHER JOB

AND THEN HE COULD
SAVE UP SOME MONEY,

AND AFFORD HIS OWN
PLACE, AND MOVE OUT,

AND THEN I WOULDN'T
END UP STABBING HIM

IN THE NECK WITH A
GRAPEFRUIT SPOON.

OUCH. IT'S GONNA HAPPEN.

YOU WANT ME TO GIVE HIM A JOB?

NOTHING IMPORTANT.

OH, GOOD. BECAUSE I WAS GONNA
PUT HIM IN CHARGE OF LEGAL.

I KNOW IT'S A LOT TO ASK, BUT I
CAN'T THINK OF ANYTHING ELSE.

WHAT CAN HE DO?

LOTS OF THINGS.

UM, UH, HE'S ALWAYS FIDDLING
AROUND, UH, USING SCREWS.

ONCE I SAW HIM USE A HAMMER.

A HAMMER?

I BET HE COULD BE A HANDYMAN.

YOU ARE ALWAYS LOOKING
FOR A GOOD HANDYMAN.

OH, I COULDN'T
PAY HIM VERY MUCH.

THAT'S OK. MAYBE HE COULD
JUST WORK FOR ROOM AND BOARD.

YOU WANT HIM TO LIVE HERE?

NO. WELL, WHAT ABOUT
THE OLD POTTING SHED?

THE OLD POTTING SHED?

THAT'S WHERE RORY AND I
LIVED WHEN SHE WAS A BABY.

IT HAS MEMORIES AND
LITTLE ROSEBUD WALLPAPER.

I DON'T WANT BOO RADLEY
TOUCHING MY ROSEBUD WALLPAPER.

A JOB IS ENOUGH,
YOU'RE RIGHT. I JUST...

HE CAN SAVE UP MONEY
AND EVENTUALLY MOVE OUT.

I'LL JUST HAVE TO DEAL WITH IT.

THE POTTING SHED'S FINE.

REALLY? YES.

I LOVE YOU.

I SWEAR TO GOD, THE MINUTE THE GUESTS
START COMPLAINING OR DISAPPEARING,

HE'S OUT OF THERE.

MORE THAN FAIR!

IT'S REALLY GOOD JAM.

YEAH, IT IS, ISN'T IT?

GRANDMA.

RORY! HELLO.

WHAT A LOVELY DAY TO... OH.

ARE YOU OK?

I GUESS PUTTING IN A WALKWAY
NEVER OCCURRED TO YOUR MOTHER.

OH, ACTUALLY IT OCCURS TO HER
EVERY DAY ON THE WAY TO WORK. HERE.

THANK YOU.

ARE YOUR SHOES OK?

THEY'RE FINE.

JUST A LITTLE MUDDY, THAT'S ALL.

HERE, GIVE THEM. I'LL
CLEAN THEM FOR YOU.

OH, YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO THAT.

MY MOM FOUND THIS
GREAT SHOE CLEANER.

IT GETS OUT PRETTY
MUCH ANYTHING.

DO YOU WANT SOMETHING TO DRINK?
THERE SHOULD BE ICED TEA IN THE FRIDGE.

ICED TEA WOULD BE NICE.

OH, MY GOD! THERE'S
NOTHING IN HERE.

I KNOW. IT'S A LITTLE SPARSE.

IT'S THE GRAPES OF WRATH.

DON'T WORRY. WE EAT FINE.

NO FOOD, NO DRINK. DO
YOU AT LEAST HAVE PLATES?

YES, WE HAVE PLATES.

THERE ARE WOMEN
IN BIKINIS ON THEM.

THE ORIGINAL CHARLIE'S ANGELS.

IT TOOK US YEARS TO
GET A COMPLETE SET.

YOU CAN FIND THE KATE JACKSONS
AND THE SHELLEY HACKS PRETTY EASILY.

EVEN THE CHERYL LADDS.

BUT THE FARRAH FAWCETTS AND JACLYN
SMITHS ARE A LITTLE HARDER TO COME BY,

BUT STILL ACCESSIBLE.

THE REAL TRICK, HOWEVER, IS
TO FIND THE TANYA ROBERTS.

WE HAVE 3.

YOU HAVE 3 TANYA ROBERTS? YEP.

AND I WAS WORRIED. SILLY ME.

HOW ARE YOU DOING
WITH THOSE SHOES?

ALL DONE.

AH, THAT'S AMAZING!
WHAT IS THAT YOU USED?

I DON'T KNOW.

WE GOT IT OFF ONE OF
THOSE LATE-NIGHT T.V. ADS.

APPARENTLY IT ALSO GETS RUST OFF NAILS
AND HINGES, WAXES YOUR CAR PERFECTLY,

AND WEATHERPROOFS
WINDOWS AND DOORS.

ISN'T THAT NICE.

OK, ABOUT TODAY.

I THINK I SHOULD JUST GIVE YOU
THE GRAND TOUR OF THE TOWN.

SO WE CAN START BY
WALKING TO KIM'S ANTIQUES

WHICH TAKES US BY
ALL THE GOOD SITES.

WELL, UH, RORY, I DON'T THINK I WORE
THE RIGHT SHOES FOR THE GRAND TOUR.

WHY DON'T WE JUST DRIVE?

YOU CAN BORROW SOME
OF MY MOM'S SHOES.

OH, NO, I DON'T THINK SO.

RORY, HOLD ON A MINUTE.

GRANDMA, YOU'LL BE MISSING THE
TRUE STARS HOLLOW EXPERIENCE

IF YOU DON'T WALK. TRUST ME.

ALL RIGHT. BUT I WON'T WEAR ANYTHING
WITH RHINESTONES OR ZEBRA STRIPES

OR ANYTHING THAT HAS
BATTERIES OR... OR THAT SINGS

OR MAKES ANIMAL NOISES
OR MOVES ON ITS OWN.

GRANDMA, I GOT IT.

WOW.

IT MUST HAVE BEEN SOMETHING

WHEN IT WAS ALL
FIXED UP AND NICE.

CAN I ASK WHAT THE
FASCINATION WITH THIS PLACE IS?

OH, WELL, UM, ME
AND MY FRIEND SOOKIE,

WE'VE BEEN KIND OF
TOYING WITH THE IDEA

OF OPENING OUR
OWN PLACE TOGETHER.

REALLY?

YEAH. I MEAN, SOMEDAY.

OBVIOUSLY NOT NOW.
WE'RE STILL SAVING UP.

ARE YOU CLOSE?

NO, NOT AT ALL.

WELL, THIS LOOKS LIKE IT
COULD BE A GREAT PLACE.

YEAH, IT REALLY DOES.

GOD. A LITTLE PAINT,
SOME PRETTY CURTAINS,

$150,000 OF CONSTRUCTION,
AND WE'RE OPEN FOR BUSINESS.

DID YOU ALWAYS
WANT TO OWN AN INN?

OH, NO, I WAS STILL DREAMING
OF OWNING A RED CAMARO

WHEN RORY APPEARED ON THE SCENE.

AH, RIGHT.

IT'S A NEW IDEA IN THE LAST
COUPLE OF YEARS, ACTUALLY.

HOW ABOUT YOU? DID YOU ALWAYS
WANT TO BE A PHOTOGRAPHER?

NOT SPECIFICALLY.

I JUST REMEMBER
GROWING UP THINKING,

"I WANNA BE ANYWHERE BUT HERE."

AH, THAT WAS YOU
IN THE OTHER ROOM!

I MADE SURE TO PICK SOMETHING
THAT WOULD KEEP ME MOVING.

CONSTANTLY.

SOUNDS EXCITING.

IT IS. TIRING, TOO. AND...

AND NOW THAT I'M HERE,
BACK WITH LUKE, I DON'T KNOW.

THINGS SEEM TO BE GOING
PRETTY WELL FOR YOU GUYS.

I GUESS. BUT I TELL YOU
THESE LAST COUPLE OF WEEKS

IT'S BECOME INCREASINGLY
APPARENT TO ME

THAT THINGS JUST CAN'T
CONTINUE THE WAY THEY'VE BEEN.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

I MEAN, I THINK IT'S
TIME WE GET SERIOUS.

I'M READY TO "SETTLE
DOWN," I GUESS,

IS THE CREEPY,
OLD-FASHIONED TERM FOR IT.

PRETTY DAMN SCARY, HUH?

PRETTY DAMN SCARY.

I FEEL RIDICULOUS.

YOU LOOK GREAT.

I LOOK LIKE A CLYDESDALE.

YOU LOOK LIKE YOU
ARE COMFORTABLE.

PEOPLE ARE STARING.

BECAUSE YOU LOOK GREAT.

YES, WHAT A SHAME YOUR
GRANDFATHER ISN'T HERE.

HE'D FALL IN LOVE WITH
ME ALL OVER AGAIN.

I THINK WE CAME IN
THROUGH THE STOREROOM.

NOPE, THIS IS IT.

THIS IS THE ANTIQUE STORE?

YOU HAVE TO DIG, BUT YOU
CAN FIND GREAT STUFF HERE.

THIS IS RIDICULOUS. NO ONE CAN
RUN A QUALITY BUSINESS LIKE THIS.

THIS PLACE IS DUSTY
AND DISORGANIZED.

AND YOU CAN'T POSSIBLY...

OH, NOW THAT IS GORGEOUS!

LOOK AT THE
WOODWORK. IT'S EXQUISITE.

I WONDER IF IT HAS A MATE.

GRANDMA, LOOK AT THIS.

IT'S GOT LIKE LITTLE
FLOWERS ALL OVER IT.

IT'S VERY PRETTY.

IS IT SOMETHING SPECIAL?

DO YOU LIKE IT? YEAH.

THEN IT'S SOMETHING SPECIAL.

HI.

LANE, THIS IS MY GRANDMA.

GRANDMA, THIS IS
MY FRIEND, LANE.

WELL, I'VE HEARD
A LOT ABOUT YOU.

IT'S NICE TO MEET YOU.

UH, RORY, CAN I TALK
TO YOU FOR A SEC?

GO. TALK. I HAVE A LOT
OF LOOKING TO DO HERE.

PROBLEM.

HIT ME.

IT'S BEEN A WEEK SINCE THAT
PARTY AND HE HAS NOT CALLED.

HENRY. HE SAID HE'D CALL.

MAYBE HE'S BEEN BUSY.

MAYBE HE HAS A GIRLFRIEND. LANE.

A TINY, PERFECT KOREAN GIRL THAT
HIS PARENTS WILL LOVE AND APPROVE OF.

LANE, YOU'RE A TINY,
PERFECT KOREAN GIRL

THAT HIS PARENTS WOULD
LOVE AND APPROVE OF.

NO, THEY'D KNOW. KNOW WHAT?

KNOW THAT I LISTEN
TO THE WRONG MUSIC

AND WISH I COULD GO BLOND
WITHOUT LOOKING LIKE AN IDIOT.

OR THAT I'D TAKE A WHOPPER
OVER KIMCHI IN A HEARTBEAT.

NOW YOU'RE JUST GOING CRAZY.

SO HE DOESN'T LIKE ME,
HE'S NOT GONNA CALL.

IT'S NOT THE END OF THE
WORLD. I'LL LIVE. I'LL GO ON.

THERE'S ALWAYS COLLEGE,
UNLESS MY PARENTS GET THEIR WAY,

AND THEN IT'S, "I
TAKE THEE, JESUS,

TO BE MY LAWFUL WEDDED HUSBAND."

LANE, WITH ALL DUE RESPECT
TO YOUR FIANCE, HENRY WILL CALL.

NO, HE'S NOT.

THEN WHY DID HE TALK
TO YOU ALL NIGHT WELL...

AND FOLLOW YOU AROUND
EVERYWHERE YOU WENT 'CAUSE...

AND ASK YOU TO DANCE 6 TIMES?

WAS IT 6 TIMES?

IT WAS 6 TIMES.

HE DID NOT ASK YOU TO DANCE 6
TIMES BECAUSE YOU'RE A GOOD DANCER.

BECAUSE TO TELL YOU THE TRUTH,
AND AS MUCH AS I LOVE YOU, YOU'RE NOT.

REALLY?

YOU'RE AN EMBARRASSMENT TO
THE ART OF DANCING. THANK YOU.

THAT'S MID-19TH CENTURY.
4 DIFFERENT KINDS OF WOOD.

IS IT MISSING AN INLAY? NO.

I THOUGHT IT WAS MISSING
AN INLAY. PERFECT CONDITION!

HOW MUCH? $3,500 FOR THE PAIR.

YOU MUST BE JOKING! NO, NO JOKE.

WELL, THEY'RE NICE,
BUT NOT THAT NICE.

NOT A BETTER PAIR
ON THE EAST COAST.

$2,000. YOU'RE FROM HARTFORD.

YES. IT HARDLY MATTERS WHERE I'M FROM.
I KNOW THESE PIECES ARE OVERPRICED.

LOOK ON THE BOTTOM.
THEY'RE NOT SIGNED.

LOOK ON THE BOTTOM!
ARE THEY SIGNED?

LOOK ON THE BOTTOM.
THEY'RE SIGNED.

HOW DO I KNOW THAT'S AUTHENTIC?

YOU HAVE MY WORD.

A LETTER OF
AUTHENTICATION? THAT, TOO.

IT'S LIKE WATCHING
THE WILLIAMS SISTERS.

I WISH WE HAD POPCORN.

I WON'T TAKE IT. THEN
SOMEONE ELSE WILL!

EVENTUALLY, MAYBE.

I CAN WAIT. SO CAN I.

IT'S MY LAST OFFER.

I'LL THINK ABOUT IT.
I'LL WAIVE THE TAX.

AND THROW IN DELIVERY.

WE APPRECIATE YOUR BUSINESS.

I LIKE THAT WOMAN.

AND YOU KNOW WHAT?
I LIKE THESE SHOES.

YOU'RE BECOMING
ONE OF US, GRANDMA.

THIS WAY?

YEAH.

GREAT. I LOVE THIS STREET.

HEY.

MAY I HELP YOU?

YEAH, I... I NEED TO
KNOW WHERE MY ROOM IS.

UH, ARE YOU SURE YOU
ARE IN THE RIGHT PLACE?

PERHAPS YOU WANT THE Y.M.C.A.
OR THE LOCAL BUS STATION?

YOU SPEAK ENGLISH?

DO YOU HAVE A RESERVATION?

I WORK HERE.

I DO NOT THINK SO. YOU
SEE, WE HAVE STANDARDS.

AND EVEN IF THEY WERE
MUCH, MUCH LOWER,

YOU WOULD STILL BE
POOR BOY OUT OF LUCK.

I... I'M THE NEW HANDYMAN.
LORELAI HIRED ME.

OH, YOU KNOW
LORELAI. I DATED HER.

OH, YOU DID?

DON'T SPREAD IT AROUND. IT'S
NOT ONE OF MY SHINING MOMENTS.

AND YOU PROBABLY HAVE
SO MANY TO PICK FROM.

YOU'RE RUDE.

YOU'VE CUT ME TO THE QUICK.
OUT OF HERE, TEENY TINY MAN.

I WILL ONLY BE PUSHED SO FAR!

AND OBVIOUSLY, IT'S DOWN.

RUNE, YOU MADE IT. GREAT.

FINALLY. WILL YOU
TELL THIS GUY WHO I AM?

UH, THIS IS RUNE.

YOU KNOW HIM?

HE'S OUR NEW HANDYMAN.

SEE? HANDYMAN. BE QUIET.

GO BUILD US ANOTHER STATUE.

YOU HIRED THIS MAN?

YES.

DID YOU DATE HIM ALSO?

WHAT? NO, I DIDN'T DATE HIM.

I DIDN'T DATE YOU.
IT WAS ONE NIGHT.

ONE NIGHT. YOU AND HIM TOGETHER?

I'LL EXPLAIN LATER.

OH, I CANNOT WAIT.

YES. LISTEN, UH, RUNE,
UH, COME WITH ME.

I'LL SHOW YOU WHERE
YOU'RE GONNA STAY.

COULD YOU ASK YOUR
BELLBOY TO GRAB MY STUFF?

I SPRAINED MY SHOULDER
ON THE WAY OVER HERE.

RELAX. I GOT IT.

GREAT.

OH, JEEZ.

MOVE IT, RUNE.

SO WHAT DO YOU THINK?

WELL, I THINK IT'S VERY NICE.

MOM'S OFFICE IS
RIGHT BACK THERE.

OH, AND YOU HAVE TO
SEE THE DINING ROOM.

THEY GOT THE CHANDELIERS FROM
ONE OF MARTHA WASHINGTON'S HOUSES.

DO YOU SPEND A LOT OF TIME HERE?

YEAH. I WORK HERE A
COUPLE AFTERNOONS A WEEK.

AND I HELP OUT WITH
SPECIAL OCCASIONS.

THEY HAVE A LOT
OF WEDDINGS HERE.

I WONDER WHERE MOM IS.

OH, DON'T BOTHER YOUR
MOTHER. I'M SURE SHE'S BUSY.

NO, SHE'D WANT TO SAY HI.

MICHEL, WHERE'S MOM?

OFF WITH HER BOYFRIEND.

WHAT BOYFRIEND?

SMALL, DARK, WANTED IN 4 STATES.

OK, WELL, UH, DO YOU KNOW
WHEN SHE'S COMING BACK?

'CAUSE MY GRANDMA'S
HERE, WE WANNA SAY HI.

YOUR GRANDMOTHER.

EMILY GILMORE.

MICHEL GERARD.

OK, WELL, WE'D
BETTER GO FIND MOM.

IT'S BEEN A PLEASURE
MEETING YOU.

THE PLEASURE IS ALL MINE.

WHAT A CHARMING MAN.

OH, OK.

MOM, HI.

MOM, HI.

LORELAI, IT'S QUITE A
PLACE YOU'VE GOT HERE.

OH, WELL, IT'S NOT REALLY
MY PLACE. I JUST WORK HERE.

SO I THOUGHT YOU WERE
GONNA GO ANTIQUING.

YEAH, WE DID, AND
THEN WE HAD LUNCH.

OH, REALLY? WHERE?

TERIYAKI JOE'S.

YOU'RE KIDDING.

SHE PICKED. YOU DID?

IT LOOKED FESTIVE.

I... I CAN'T PICTURE
YOU AT TERIYAKI JOE'S

OR IN JOGGING SHOES.
WHAT'S UP, WORKING GIRL?

WELL, RORY DECIDED
THAT WE SHOULD TAKE

THE GRAND TOUR OF THE
TOWN, THAT MEANT WALKING.

I HOPE YOU DON'T MIND. I
BORROWED YOUR SOCKS ALSO.

OH, I DON'T MIND. I WISH I HAD
A CAMERA, BUT I DON'T MIND.

I'M GONNA SHOW HER THE GROUNDS.

OH, YEAH, GOOD. ON THE WAY BACK,
SHOW HER THE GYM. JUMP ON THE TREADMILL.

SEE YOU LATER.

MAKE SURE YOU STRETCH FIRST.

I JUST LOVE YOUR MOTHER.

SO THE HORSES
ARE UP ON THAT HILL,

AND THE TENNIS
COURTS ARE BACK THERE.

IT'S CERTAINLY IMPRESSIVE.

AND THIS IS MY FAVORITE PLACE.

THE TOOL SHED?

NO, THIS IS WHERE
WE USED TO LIVE.

WHAT?

RIGHT WHEN MOM AND I MOVED
HERE, THIS WAS OUR APARTMENT.

BUT... I KNOW IT LOOKS SMALL,

BUT IT'S REALLY PRETTY. COME ON.

SEE, WE HAD OUR BED
RIGHT OVER THERE,

AND MOM PUT UP THIS REALLY
PRETTY CURTAIN AROUND THE TUB

SO THAT IT LOOKED
LIKE A REAL BATHROOM.

AND WE WOULD JUST
SIT OUTSIDE AT NIGHT

WHEN THE INN WOULD HAVE PARTIES,

AND WE'D JUST LISTEN TO
MUSIC, AND FEED THE DUCKS AND...

GRANDMA?

GRANDMA, WAIT.
WHAT'S THE MATTER?

NOTHING.

DID SOMETHING HAPPEN?

ARE YOU SICK? IS
IT THE TERIYAKI?

I... I... I'M FINE. IT'S JUST
GETTING LATE. I HAVE TO GO.

BUT...

HEY. DO YOU MIND?

WHAT? OH, SORRY.

HEY, GOOD, YOU GOT MY MESSAGE.

HAIL THE GLORY OF THE
ANSWERING MACHINE.

COME ON IN.

I JUST DEVELOPED SOME SHOTS OF THE
DRAGONFLY I THINK YOU'RE GONNA LOVE.

MAYBE THEY CAN HELP
INSPIRE YOU A LITTLE MORE.

OH, GREAT.

I'VE NEVER BEEN IN
LUKE'S APARTMENT BEFORE.

REALLY? HOW LONG HAVE
YOU TWO KNOWN EACH OTHER?

OH, GOD, YEARS, BUT OUR
RELATIONSHIP IS STRICTLY,

"PLEASE, CAN I
HAVE COFFEE?" "NO."

"COME ON!" "NO, IT MAKES
YOU SHORT." BLAH, BLAH, BLAH.

THEN LET ME GIVE
YOU THE GRAND TOUR.

THIS IS IT.

IT'S, UH, NOT HOW I PICTURED IT.

I MEAN, NOT THAT I HAVE BEEN
PICTURING LUKE'S APARTMENT.

I HAVEN'T BEEN
PICTURING IT AT ALL.

I KNOW WHAT YOU MEANT.

NICE TOUCH.

OH, THOSE AREN'T MINE.

YOU'RE KIDDING.

NOPE. FRANKLY, A LITTLE
TOO FRILLY FOR MY TASTE.

AH, I'M GONNA GIVE HIM
SO MUCH CRAP ABOUT THAT.

HAVE A SEAT.

THANKS.

MAN, YOU GUYS LIVE IN
PRETTY TIGHT QUARTERS HERE.

WELL, THIS WAS
ORIGINALLY HIS DAD'S OFFICE.

SO IT WAS NEVER REALLY MEANT
FOR ANYONE TO ACTUALLY LIVE IN.

BUT TELL THAT TO LUKE.

EXACTLY.

DO YOU THINK ABOUT
MOVING TO A BIGGER PLACE?

I DON'T THINK SO.

NO? OH. RIGHT,

BECAUSE TIGHT QUARTERS,
ROMANTIC. HELLO, LORELAI.

YEAH, WELL, I DON'T THINK
ROMANCE HAS A LOT TO DO WITH IT.

NO?

I'M NOT SURE I'M GONNA BE IN
STARS HOLLOW MUCH LONGER.

OH, BUT I THOUGHT...

I KNOW.

I JUST... I CAN'T SEEM
TO MAKE LUKE BELIEVE

THAT I REALLY WANT
TO STAY THIS TIME.

DID YOU TELL HIM ALL
THE STUFF YOU TOLD ME?

TILL I WAS BLUE IN THE FACE.

WELL, YOU JUST HAVE TO KEEP
TRYING UNTIL HE HEARS YOU.

HEY, I DON'T BLAME HIM.

I'VE GIVEN HIM NO
REASON TO BELIEVE ME.

I JUST HOPED THAT
MAGICALLY, SOMEHOW, HE'D,

I DON'T KNOW, FORGET THAT I'D SKIPPED
OUT ON HIM A MILLION TIMES BEFORE.

HAVE YOU TOLD HIM THAT
YOU'RE THINKING OF LEAVING?

NO. ARE YOU GOING TO?

I DON'T KNOW.

I MEAN, I FEEL LIKE I'VE BEEN TRYING
SO HARD TO MAKE EVERYTHING GOOD.

BUT THIS TOWN, YOU KNOW, IT'S
LIKE LIVING UNDER A MICROSCOPE.

EVERYONE HERE'S JUST
WAITING FOR YOU TO SCREW UP.

NO, THAT'S NOT TRUE.

MISS PATTY?

OH, WELL, YEAH.

I DON'T KNOW HOW LONG I CAN
STICK AROUND HERE WAITING FOR LUKE

WHEN I FEEL LIKE I DON'T
HAVE A FRIEND IN THE WORLD.

HEY, IF YOU CAN FRENCH-BRAID
HAIR, I'LL BE YOUR FRIEND.

SORRY.

OH, WELL, SEE YOU.

I CANNOT FIND YOUR
PICTURES HERE.

THEY MUST BE IN THE BATHROOM.

SO DO NOT WANT TO KNOW WHY.

LISTEN, I KNOW THIS
IS SO NOT COOL TO ASK,

BUT IF THE SITUATION COMES
UP, AND IT'S NOT TOO WEIRD,

A LITTLE WORD OF ENCOURAGEMENT
FROM YOU MIGHT HELP A LOT.

OH, YEAH, SURE, IF IT COMES UP.

THANKS.

WHAT, YOU DON'T KNOCK?

WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

RACHEL INVITED ME. TO
LOOK AT SOME PICTURES.

GOOD. YEAH.

AND GO THROUGH YOUR
UNDERWEAR DRAWER.

WHERE IS SHE? FREEZING YOUR BRA.

WHERE? IN THE BATHROOM.

RIGHT.

IT'S A NICE PLACE YOU HAVE HERE.

THANK YOU.

I LIKE THE CURTAINS.

YEAH, YEAH, RACHEL
PICKED THEM OUT.

OH, SHE'S GOT GOOD TASTE.

OH, HEY.

HI. I JUST HAD TO PUT
SOMETHING IN THE SAFE.

WE WERE JUST...

I TOLD HIM ABOUT THE
UNDERWEAR DRAWER.

AND THE BASEBALL-CAP
FASHION SHOW?

OK, I'M GONNA GO NOW.

I THINK HE'S GOING TO
BUY A MATCHING RUG.



I LIKE THIS SONG.

IT MAKES ME GLOOMY.

GLOOMY'S GOOD.

REALLY GLOOMY.

LIKE, JOY DIVISION GLOOMY?

NICK CAVE GLOOMY,
ROBERT SMITH GLOOMY?

JOHNNY CASH GLOOMY.

SO, KIND OF LIKE
A SAN QUENTIN-Y,

"IT'S A LONG ROAD HOME,
AND MY HORSE JUST GOT SHOT,

BUT I STILL GOT MY GIRL
BY MY SIDE" GLOOMY?

YOU READ MY MIND.

I'M DEEP IN A CHARLIE
PARKER GLOOMY.

HENRY STILL HASN'T CALLED?

OH, NO, HE CALLED.

HE DID? WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME?

WELL, I DIDN'T TALK TO
HIM. HE LEFT A MESSAGE.

I LISTENED TO IT
8-AND-A-HALF TIMES,

BUT THEN MY MOM CAME
HOME AND I HAD TO ERASE IT.

BUT I WAS SO PANICKED
THAT I BROKE IT.

WHICH IS BETTER,
BECAUSE NOW ALL EVIDENCE

THAT A BOY CALLED
ME IS IN THE TRASH.

8-AND-A-HALF TIMES.

WELL, IT WAS A GOOD MESSAGE,
THE FIRST COUPLE TIMES.

THEN I STARTED
PARSING IT FOR SUBTEXT.

WHAT DID HE SAY?

HE SAID, AND I QUOTE,

"HEY, LANE, IT'S HENRY."

NOT A GOOD START.

HOW DO YOU FIGURE?

IT'S SO GENDER-NEUTRAL.

IT'S HOW YOU START A
CONVERSATION WITH A BOWLING PAL.

HE ASKED YOU BOWLING?

THEN HE SAID, "IT WAS FUN
MEETING YOU THE OTHER NIGHT."

WHAT?

HE DIDN'T SAY WHICH NIGHT, LIKE
HE DIDN'T REMEMBER WHICH NIGHT.

LIKE HE'S MIXING ME UP WITH
ANOTHER GIRL FROM ANOTHER NIGHT.

FOR ALL I KNOW, HE THOUGHT
HE WAS CALLING THE HOT BLONDE

HE MET AT A HOPPED-UP
NIGHT AT BALTHAZAR'S.

HE'S A 16-YEAR-OLD KOREAN BOY.

OR SO HE LED ME TO BELIEVE.

WHAT'S THE BOTTOM LINE HERE?

THE BOTTOM LINE IS THAT HE
WANTS ME TO CALL HIM BACK.

BUT IF I DO THAT, THEN HE'S PROBABLY
GONNA ASK ME OUT ON A DATE.

AND IF WE GO OUT ON A DATE, THEN
IT COULD LEAD TO ANOTHER DATE.

AND THEN I'LL HAVE TO
INTRODUCE HIM TO MY PARENTS.

AND ONCE I DO THAT
THEY ARE GONNA LIKE HIM

BECAUSE HE'S KOREAN, AND
HE'S GONNA BE A DOCTOR.

AND THEN, ONCE THAT
HAPPENS, THAT'S IT.

IT'LL BE OVER. HE'LL
BE HIDEOUS TO ME.

NOW I'M A LOU REED GLOOMY.

HELLO?

RORY, HELLO. DO
YOU HAVE A MINUTE?

UM, SURE.

NOW, I KNOW, THIS WILL
PROBABLY SEEM SILLY,

BUT I WAS WONDERING WHAT
YOUR FAVORITE COLOR IS.

OH, I DON'T REALLY HAVE ONE.

BLUE, I GUESS.

OK. WHAT ABOUT FLOWERS?
DO YOU LIKE FLOWERS?

SURE.

WHICH WOULD YOU SAY YOU
LIKE BETTER: ROSES OR LILIES?

UM, SUNFLOWERS.

SUNFLOWERS IT IS.

NOW, WHAT ABOUT MUSIC?

NSYNC OR 98 DEGREES?

UH, NSYNC OR 98 DEGREES?

WHAT KIND OF SICK JOKE IS THIS?

I DON'T THINK I COULD CHOOSE.

WELL, WHAT ABOUT THAT OTHER
GROUP, THE BACKSIDE BOYS?

YOU MEAN THE BACKSTREET BOYS?

YES, THAT'S IT.

UM, I GUESS IF I REALLY HAD
TO CHOOSE, I'D SAY NSYNC.

WONDERFUL.

ARE YOU WRITING THIS DOWN?

MAYBE.

WHAT FOR?

YOU'LL SEE. I'M LOOKING
FORWARD TO DINNER ON FRIDAY.

OK. YEAH, ME, TOO.

BYE. BYE-BYE.

WHAT WAS THAT?

SOUNDED LIKE SOME SICK
TAKE ON THE GALLUP SURVEY.

I GOTTA GO.

CALL HIM.

I ALREADY LEFT HIM A MESSAGE.

HE'S PROBABLY
PARSING IT RIGHT NOW.

I'M SURE.

HEY. HEY.

WANT SOME COFFEE?

OH, YEAH, COFFEE WOULD BE GREAT.

THANKS.

WATCH THE LID THERE.

WOW, IT REALLY LOOKS. UH,
DIFFERENT FROM BACK HERE, YOU KNOW?

ALL THIS IS YOURS, AS
FAR AS THE EYE CAN SEE.

YES, IT'S QUITE AN EMPIRE
I'VE BUILT FOR MYSELF.

I'M THINKING OF CONQUERING
THE FLOWER SHOP NEXT DOOR

AND EXPANDING THE FREEZER.

HEY, I DIDN'T MEAN TO KICK YOU
OUT OF YOUR OWN APARTMENT.

OH, YOU DIDN'T.

WELL, YOU LEFT PRETTY FAST.

YOU GUYS LOOKED LIKE YOU
WERE TALKING GIRL-TALK, SO...

GIRL-TALK? WHAT'S GIRL-TALK?

YOU KNOW,
PANTYHOSE, NAIL POLISH.

CURTAINS.

YES, THAT STUFF.

HMM.

YOU DIDN'T LIKE
ME BEING UP THERE?

NO BIG DEAL.

SO, THIS IS THE
FASCINATING STORAGE AREA

WHERE FASCINATING ACTS
OF STORAGE TAKE PLACE.

YEP, THIS IS IT.

SOME GOOD-LOOKING PICKLES.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

I'M ADMIRING YOUR PICKLES.

YOU SHOULDN'T BE IN HERE.

WHY NOT?

MY INSURANCE COVERS ONLY ME.

THAT'S NOT TRUE.
YOU'RE KIDDING, RIGHT?

IT'S NOT SAFE.
SOMETHING MIGHT FALL.

YOU DON'T LIKE ME HANGING
OUT WITH RACHEL, DO YOU?

OH, COME ON! AM I RIGHT?

YOU CAN HANG OUT
WITH ANYBODY YOU WANT.

NOT MY QUESTION.

WELL, THAT'S MY ANSWER.

WELL, WE'RE 8.

JUST A FRIENDLY PIECE OF ADVICE:

DON'T GET TOO ATTACHED TO HER.

RACHEL? YEAH.

SHE'S GOT AN INTERESTING HABIT
OF GETTING BORED AND THEN LEAVING.

USUALLY WITHOUT SAYING GOODBYE.

PEOPLE BREAK HABITS.

NOT OFTEN.

SO, YOU'RE JUST CONVINCED
THAT THAT'S WHAT SHE'S GONNA DO.

I'LL BET YOU THAT'S
EXACTLY WHAT SHE DOES.

WELL, LET'S SAY IT
IS WHAT SHE DOES.

DON'T YOU THINK THERE'S
THE TEENSIEST POSSIBILITY

THAT IF RACHEL LEAVES
STARS HOLLOW THIS TIME

IT'S BECAUSE SHE THINKS
YOU DON'T WANT HER TO STAY?

ARE YOU GUYS TALKING ABOUT ME?

NO.

YES.

OK, I DON'T MIND IF YOU
HANG OUT WITH HER,

BUT YOU WILL NOT TALK ABOUT ME.

WHY? IT'S FUN. WE WEAR
PLAID, TAKE TURNS NOT SHAVING.

THERE WILL BE NO
LUKE-TALK. PERIOD.

DO YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT
I THINK ABOUT THIS SITUATION?

NO. ARE YOU SURE?

WELL, IF YOU'RE GONNA TELL
ME, AT LEAST HELP ME UNLOAD.

CAN I USE THE FUN CUTTER THINGY?

NOT IF YOU CALL IT "THE
FUN CUTTER THINGY."

PLEASE?

CUT THE BOX, NOT YOUR HAND.

GOOD TIP. YOU SHOULD TEACH.

HA, FUN!

TALK.

WELL, I DON'T KNOW EXACTLY
WHAT'S GOING ON IN RACHEL'S HEAD

BECAUSE I'M NOT A VULCAN,

BUT FROM THE WAY
SHE TALKS ABOUT YOU

AND THE WAY SHE SMILES
WHEN YOUR NAME COMES UP,

I'M PRETTY SURE THAT SHE'S SERIOUS
ABOUT STAYING IN STARS HOLLOW THIS TIME.

LET ME GUESS. RACHEL TOLD YOU
THAT SHE WANTED TO PUT DOWN ROOTS,

THAT SHE'S SERIOUS THIS TIME,

THAT SHE'S TIRED OF THE ROAD,

AND REALIZES WHAT'S LACKING
IN HER NOMADIC EXISTENCE.

SHE DIDN'T USE THE PHRASE
"NOMADIC EXISTENCE,"

BUT BASICALLY, YES,
THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID.

I'VE HEARD THE SPEECH. I
KNOW THE SPEECH BY HEART.

I THINK SHE MEANS IT THIS TIME.

YOU DON'T KNOW HER LIKE I DO.

UH, I... I DON'T, BUT
SHE SEEMS SINCERE.

HOW DO YOU KNOW?

HER NOSE DIDN'T GROW.

WHY ARE YOU TAKING HER SIDE?

I'M NOT TAKING HER SIDE.

IT SOUNDS LIKE YOU'RE
TAKING HER SIDE.

WASH OUT YOUR EARS. I
AM NOT TAKING HER SIDE.

YOU'RE PRACTICALLY
PUSHING HER ON ME.

I... I JUST WANT
YOU TO BE HAPPY.

AND YOU KNOW WHAT
MAKES ME HAPPY?

NO. I JUST KNOW THAT
YOU'VE BEEN CARRYING

A TORCH FOR HER FOR
A REALLY LONG TIME.

I HAVE NOT BEEN
CARRYING A TORCH FOR HER.

WELL, YOU WANTED THIS TO HAPPEN.

HOW DO YOU KNOW WHAT
I WANTED TO HAPPEN?

DIDN'T YOU?

YEAH, I GUESS.

OK.

SO HERE IT IS, RIGHT
IN FRONT OF YOU.

JUST TAKE IT.

TAKE THE PLUNGE.
SHE COULD BE READY.

JUST JUMP IN AND BELIEVE HER.

UNLESS, YOU KNOW, THERE'S SOME
OTHER REASON YOU DON'T WANT TO.

LIKE WHAT?

LIKE, I... I...

I DON'T KNOW.

THERE'S NO OTHER REASON.

OK. WELL, FINE, THEN
THERE'S NO OTHER REASON.

I'LL THINK ABOUT IT.

OK. WELL.

THANKS FOR LETTING
ME BORROW YOUR THINGY.

YOU'RE WELCOME.

I'LL SEE YOU LATER, LUKE.

SHE ACTUALLY ASKED

IF YOU LIKE THE BACKSTREET BOYS?

EXCEPT SHE CALLED
THEM "BACKSIDE BOYS."

HA. THAT IS HIGH COMEDY.

WHAT INSPIRED THAT WOMAN?

I DON'T KNOW. IT WAS WEIRD.

THIS SUDDEN
INTEREST IN POP MUSIC.

I SAT HER DOWN TO LISTEN
TO A PRINCE SONG ONCE,

AND SHE LOOKED LIKE
SHE WAS HAVING A STROKE.

WAIT A MINUTE. I KNOW
WHAT SHE'S DOING.

WHAT?

SHE'S TRYING TO BE YOUR PAL NOW.

OH, THAT SNEAK.

YOU SPEND ONE DAY TOGETHER,

AND SHE WANTS TO
KNOW ALL ABOUT YOU.

SHE'S PICTURING YOU
GUYS CHATTING ABOUT BOYS

AND PAINTING EACH
OTHER'S TOENAILS...

OH, HEY, KIRK. ARE
YOU GETTING A COLD?

YOU KNOW, YOU SHOULD TRY
THAT DYNA-MEDA-CHEMA-THEMYTOL.

KNOCKS IT RIGHT OUT. BUT DON'T
DRIVE YOUR FORKLIFT, THOUGH,

'CAUSE IT'LL MAKE YOU DROWSY.

OH, WOW. WHEN'S THE LAST TIME
YOU THINK LUKE'S BEEN TO A MOVIE?

I DON'T KNOW, BUT I THINK THE GUY
HAD TO CRANK THE PROJECTOR BY HAND.

DO YOU MIND?

KIRK, THE MOVIE HASN'T
EVEN STARTED YET.

I LIKE TO HAVE SILENCE IN ORDER
TO CLEANSE MY MENTAL PALATE

AND ACHIEVE CALM BEFORE
ENJOYING A MOTION PICTURE.

OH, YOU GOT THAT OUT OF A BOOK.

LUKE LOOKS HAPPY, DOESN'T HE?

YEAH, HE LOOKS HAPPY.

THEY... THEY SEEM REALLY
RIGHT TOGETHER, DON'T THEY?

JUST RIGHT.

GOOD, GOOD. HE DESERVES IT.

SO I DID THE RIGHT THING
BY BUTTING IN THE WAY I DID.

YOU BUTTED IN FOR
ALL THE RIGHT REASONS.

YOU WERE CONCERNED
ABOUT A FRIEND.



SO, IF RACHEL TURNS
OUT TO BE AN EVIL FEMBOT

AND MURDERS LUKE IN HIS
SLEEP, I'M NOT RESPONSIBLE, AM I?

ONLY IN AN INTERGALACTIC COURT.

GOOD.

RACHEL SEEMS REALLY
GREAT, DOESN'T...

YOU ARE NOW OFFICIALLY
DISTURBING NOT JUST ME,

BUT EVERY PERSON
IN THIS THEATRE.

KIRK, YOU'RE THE ONLY
ONE WHO'S DISTURBED.

OH.

SHH!

HELLO?

SHH!

HELLO? DAMN IT!

HELLO, HELLO, HELLO!

WOW, MOM, HI. CHECK
THE RUBBING ALCOHOL.

HOW WAS THE DRIVE?

THE DRIVE WAS FINE. GOOD.

THE FOYER LOOKS GREAT.

I HAVE A SURPRISE FOR YOU.

THE REST OF THE HOUSE RAN AWAY?

NO. NO.

RORY, COME WITH ME.

OK. SO, I... I... I'LL
FOLLOW YOU, THEN.

GREAT.

VOILA!

OH, MY!

UM, GRANDMA, WHAT IS THIS?

THIS IS YOUR ROOM.

WHAT?

SINCE YOU'VE BEEN SPENDING
SO MUCH TIME HERE LATELY,

I THOUGHT YOU SHOULD HAVE A
SPECIAL PLACE, ALL YOUR OWN.

BUT YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO DO THIS.

DO YOU LIKE IT?

YEAH, IT'S BEAUTIFUL.

DO YOU SEE THE NSYNC POSTER?

THANK YOU, GRANDMA.

YOU'RE WELCOME, SWEETHEART.

NOW, COME ON, LET'S GO
DOWNSTAIRS AND SEE IF DINNER'S READY.

YOU COMING?

YOU BOUGHT HER COSMOGIRL.

THE YOUNG GIRLS
ENJOY THE ARTICLES.

YOU BOUGHT BOY-BAND POSTERS
AND HELLO KITTY NOTEPADS.

A LOVELY YOUNG GIRL AT THE
STORE HELPED ME PICK THEM OUT.

YOU FILLED THE ROOM
WITH SUNFLOWERS.

RORY LIKES SUNFLOWERS.

I KNOW RORY LIKES SUNFLOWERS.

WHAT IS THE MATTER, LORELAI?

NOTHING. I DON'T KNOW.

IT'S JUST A LITTLE
WEIRD, THAT'S ALL.

WHY IS IT WEIRD TO DO SOMETHING
FOR MY GRANDDAUGHTER?

I DON'T KNOW. I MEAN, IT'S NOT
LIKE YOU BOUGHT HER A CAR.

BY THE WAY, DON'T.

IT'S A ROOM, AND...

YOU KNOW, YOU'RE RIGHT.

IT'S NICE. I'M SORRY.
I'M JUST BEING SILLY.

MAYBE YOU DON'T LIKE THE FACT THAT
NOW SHE HAS A PLACE AWAY FROM YOU.

SOMEPLACE THAT'S JUST HER OWN.

I SAID I WAS FINE.

OR BECAUSE IT'S BECAUSE
IT'S SO LARGE AND SPACIOUS

AND HAS 4 SOLID WALLS
AROUND THE BATHTUB.

EXCUSE ME?

I MEAN, IT MIGHT NOT BE
EXCITING OR BOHEMIAN,

BUT AT LEAST, IT
DOESN'T HAVE SHOVELS

PROPPED UP AGAINST THE
SOFA, EITHER, NOW, DOES IT?

I'M SORRY. I MISSED
THE CHECKERED FLAG.

WHEN DID THE ARGUMENT START?

IS IT BECAUSE IT'S NOT
A SHACK IN THE WOODS?

OR IS IT THE PROXIMITY TO ME THAT'S
MAKING YOU SO UNCOMFORTABLE?

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

YOU HATED US THAT MUCH?

WHAT?

YOU HAD TO TAKE
THAT LITTLE GIRL AWAY.

THAT WAS BAD
ENOUGH. BUT TO THAT?

TO LIVE THERE IN A
SHED LIKE A HOBO?

WHO USES THE WORD
"HOBO" ANYMORE?

I SAW IT. I SAW THAT HORRIBLE
LITTLE PIT YOU SO PROUDLY RAN TO.

I SAW WHAT YOU CHOSE
OVER YOUR OWN FAMILY.

YOU WOULD'VE
LIVED IN THE GUTTER,

IN... IN THE STREET, IN A
CARDBOARD BOX, ANYWHERE,

AS LONG AS YOU DIDN'T HAVE
TO BE NEAR US. ISN'T THAT TRUE?

ISN'T THAT TRUE, LORELAI?

MOM, I WAS VERY YOUNG.

I WAS VERY UNHAPPY.

AND I NEEDED TO BE
SOMEPLACE THAT WASN'T HERE.

EXCUSE ME.

YOU'RE AWFULLY QUIET.

I AM?

YOU HARDLY SAID
ANYTHING AT DINNER.

I WAS CHEWING.

YOU DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING
ON THE RIDE HOME.

I WAS CONCENTRATING.

SO?

I FEEL I'VE GOTTEN SLOPPY WITH THIS
WHOLE 10 AND 2 HAND POSITION THING.

YEAH, SERIOUSLY. THE OTHER DAY,
I CAUGHT MYSELF DOING A 9 AND 4.

IF LEFT UNCORRECTED, THAT
CAN ONLY LEAD TO A 6 AND 12.

OR, WORSE YET, AN 8 AND 11,

WHICH IS NOT ONLY DANGEROUS,
BUT DAMN UNCOMFORTABLE.

TALK, PLEASE.

I JUST WISH SOMETIMES THAT
CERTAIN THINGS COULD BE DIFFERENT.

LIKE WHAT?

LIKE, UM, WOULDN'T IT BE
GREAT IF ONCE, JUST ONCE,

I COULD MAKE MY MOTHER HEAR
ME? I MEAN, REALLY HEAR ME,

EVEN IF IT WAS JUST
FOR ONE SECOND.

ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT THE ROOM?

THE ROOM, THE POTTING SHED,
MY ENTIRE LIFE AFTER AGE 6.

IT'S MY FAULT.

HOW IS IT YOUR FAULT?

I SHOULDN'T HAVE
TAKEN HER THERE.

OH, RORY.

I JUST THOUGHT THAT IF
SHE SAW HOW WE LIVED

AND HOW PRETTY IT WAS
WITH THE LAKE AND THE SWANS...

SHE'D DO A HAPPY DANCE?

THAT SHE'D FEEL INCLUDED,
AND THEN, MAYBE...

THE WHOLE "ME RUNNING AWAY"
THING WOULDN'T BE SUCH A BIG DEAL?

OH, HONEY,

ME RUNNING AWAY FROM THEM

IS ALWAYS GONNA BE A BIG DEAL.

THERE IS NOTHING YOU
CAN DO TO CHANGE THAT.

CAN I ASK YOU A QUESTION?

YES, I WOULD DATE STEVEN TYLER.

CAN I ASK A QUESTION WHOSE
ANSWER WOULDN'T HORRIFY ME?

OH, GO AHEAD.

DO YOU THINK YOU AND GRANDMA
WILL EVER BE ABLE TO TALK

ABOUT THE THINGS
YOU'VE GONE THROUGH?

NO.

YOU DIDN'T EVEN CONSIDER IT.

SORRY. NO.

WHY?

BECAUSE IT WOULD JUST END BADLY.

IT DOESN'T HAVE TO.

AH, IT'D BE LIKE THE FIRST 15
MINUTES OF SAVING PRIVATE RYAN.

BUT AT LEAST THOSE
GUYS GOT TO BE IN FRANCE.

YOU'VE NEVER TRIED.

OH, NO, THAT'S NOT
TRUE. I HAVE TRIED.

I HAVE TRIED MY WHOLE LIFE.

BUT MY MOTHER AND I, WE
SPEAK A DIFFERENT LANGUAGE.

I TALK, I THINK I'M BEING CLEAR,

AND ALL SHE HEARS
IS: "BLAH, BLAH, GINGER."

BUT IF YOU WON'T TALK
AND SHE WON'T LISTEN,

THEN HOW IS ANYTHING
EVER GONNA CHANGE?

I DON'T KNOW.

THANKS.

DON'T TELL ME YOU'RE CLOSED.

WOULD IT CHANGE
THE OUTCOME IF I DID?

NO.

2 COFFEES. YES, PLEASE.

ANY PIE TO GO WITH THAT?

OH, PIE!

WE JUST HAD CAKE AT GRANDMA'S.

YEAH, BUT THAT WAS CRABBY
CAKE. LET'S HAVE HAPPY PIE.

HAVE WHATEVER YOU WANT
AS LONG AS THERE'S COFFEE.

I'LL PUT ON A FRESH POT.

HEY, LISTEN, I JUST
WANT TO SAY THANKS.

OH, FOR WHAT?

FOR WHATEVER IT WAS YOU
SAID TO LUKE THE OTHER DAY.

IT WAS NO BIG DEAL.

NO, IT WAS A VERY BIG
DEAL. I WAS SITTING UPSTAIRS,

AND SUDDENLY HE COMES IN,

EMPTIES OUT HIS SOCK
DRAWER, AND GIVES IT TO ME.

OH, THAT'S GREAT!
YOU GOT A DRAWER!

AND A SET OF KEYS.

WELL, YOU CAN PUT
THE KEYS IN THE DRAWER.

HE'S ACCEPTING IT.

HE'S BELIEVING IT.

AND IT'S ALL BECAUSE OF YOU.

ACTUALLY, IT'S BECAUSE OF YOU.

I'M NOT GONNA
SCREW IT UP THIS TIME.

I KNOW YOU WON'T.

WELL, I OWE YOU ONE.

SO, UH, YOU'RE GONNA BE IN
STARS HOLLOW FOR A WHILE, THEN?

YEAH, QUITE A WHILE.

WOW, THAT'S GREAT.

YOU WANT ANY ICE
CREAM WITH THAT PIE?

WELL, I DID GET YOU A DRAWER.

IF I THREW IN A
LITTLE HOT FUDGE,

YOU THINK YOU COULD
WEASEL ME HALF THE CLOSET?

I'LL SEE WHAT I CAN DO.

THANK YOU.

HERE.

AH, THANKS.

HUH.

DOES IT TASTE DIFFERENT TO YOU?

YEAH.

IT DOES.

SO WHAT DO YOU THINK?

IT'S GOT A GREAT VIEW.

YEAH, AND GOOD HIGHWAY ACCESS.

I LOVE THAT WINDOW
BACK IN THE...

LIBRARY? OH, NO,
LOBBY. NO, BATHROOM?

I'D GET THAT DECIDED
BEFORE YOU OPEN.

THERE'S ABSOLUTELY
NO KITCHEN SPACE HERE!

HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO
OPEN A BED AND BREAKFAST

WHEN THERE'S NO PLACE
TO COOK BREAKFAST?

THEN IT'S JUST A BED.

WE'LL HAVE TO CHARGE HALF PRICE.

WE'LL BUILD A NEW
KITCHEN, SOOKIE.

I'LL NEED PLENTY OF VENTILATION

AND... AND AN AREA FOR AN
OUTDOOR FIREPLACE FOR BARBEQUES.

PLUS STORAGE.

WHERE DID THESE
PEOPLE PUT ANYTHING?

AND, OH, AND A PANTRY
A... AND A CANNING ROOM.

AND I'D LOVE TO
SMOKE OUR OWN MEATS.

ABSOLUTELY!

I DON'T KNOW IF
THIS IS GONNA WORK.

I MAY HAVE TO DO
SOME FLOOR PLANS.

WHERE IS THAT PLUMBING?

WOW, YOUR OWN INN.

COOL, HUH?

IT'S GONNA BE A REALLY BIG JOB.

YEAH.

WELL, MAYBE I'LL GET RUNE
TO MANAGE THE PLACE FOR ME.

HOW'S HE DOING?

HE PUT A TIP JAR ON
THE RESERVATION DESK.

MICHEL TRIED TO BEAT HIM SENSELESS
WITH THE RESERVATION BOOK.

HOW DID THAT GO?

OH, RUNE GOT AWAY.

REALLY?

WELL, MICHEL CAN'T
RUN IN NEW SHOES.

SO HOW LONG DO YOU THINK
BEFORE YOU GUYS OWN THIS PLACE?

OH, SWEETIE, IT'S GOING TO BE
A VERY, VERY, VERY, LONG TIME.

DO YOU THINK
IT'LL STILL BE HERE?

YEAH.

I THINK WE GOT A SHOT.