Gilmore Girls (2000–2007): Season 1, Episode 16 - Star-Crossed Lovers and Other Strangers - full transcript

THIS, BOYS AND GIRLS,
IS A STORY OF TRUE LOVE.

A BEAUTIFUL GIRL
FROM ONE COUNTY,

A HANDSOME BOY FROM ANOTHER.

THEY MEET, AND
THEY FALL IN LOVE.

SEPARATED BY
DISTANCE AND BY PARENTS

WHO DID NOT
APPROVE OF THE UNION,

THE YOUNG COUPLE
DREAMED OF THE DAY

THAT THEY COULD BE TOGETHER.

THEY WROTE EACH
OTHER BEAUTIFUL LETTERS:

LETTERS OF LONGING AND PASSION,

LETTERS FULL OF PROMISES
AND PLANS FOR THE FUTURE.

SOON THE SEPARATION
PROVED TOO MUCH

FOR EITHER ONE OF THEM TO BEAR.

SO, ONE NIGHT, COLD AND BLACK

WITH NO LIGHT TO GUIDE THEM,

THEY BOTH SNUCK
OUT OF THEIR HOMES

AND RAN AWAY AS
FAST AS THEY COULD.

IT WAS SO DARK OUT THAT
THEY WERE BOTH SOON LOST.

AND IT SEEMED AS IF THEY
WOULD NEVER FIND EACH OTHER.

FINALLY, THE GIRL
DROPPED TO HER KNEES,

TEARS STREAMING
DOWN HER LOVELY FACE.

"OH, MY LOVE, WHERE ARE
YOU? HOW WILL I FIND YOU?"

SUDDENLY, A BAND OF
STARS APPEARED IN THE SKY.

THESE STARS SHONE SO BRIGHTLY,

THEY LIT UP THE
ENTIRE COUNTRYSIDE.

THE GIRL JUMPED TO HER FEET

AND FOLLOWED THE
PATH OF THE STARS,

UNTIL FINALLY, SHE
FOUND HERSELF STANDING

RIGHT WHERE THE
TOWN GAZEBO IS TODAY.

AND THERE WAITING FOR
HER, WAS HER ONE TRUE LOVE

WHO HAD ALSO BEEN LED HERE

BY THE BLANKET
OF FRIENDLY STARS.

AND THAT, MY FRIENDS,

IS THE STORY OF HOW
STARS HOLLOW CAME TO BE

AND WHY WE CELEBRATE
THAT FATEFUL NIGHT

EVERY YEAR AT ABOUT THIS TIME.

NOW, WE STILL HAVE
A LITTLE TIME LEFT

IN OUR STORY HOUR.

WHO WANTS TO HEAR ABOUT THE TIME

I DANCED IN A CAGE
FOR TITO PUENTE?

ME.

IT WAS THE SUMMER OF '66.

♪ IF YOU'RE OUT ON THE ROAD ♪

♪ FEELING LONELY, AND SO COLD ♪

♪ ALL YOU HAVE TO
DO IS CALL MY NAME ♪

♪ AND I'LL BE THERE
ON THE NEXT TRAIN ♪

♪ WHERE YOU LEAD,
I WILL FOLLOW ♪

♪ ANYWHERE THAT YOU TELL ME TO ♪

♪ IF YOU NEED IF YOU NEED ♪

♪ YOU NEED ME TO BE WITH YOU ♪

♪ I WILL FOLLOW ♪

♪ OH ♪

♪ WHERE YOU LEAD ♪

♪ I WILL FOLLOW ♪

♪ ANYWHERE THAT YOU TELL ME TO ♪

♪ IF YOU NEED IF YOU NEED ♪

♪ YOU NEED ME TO BE WITH YOU ♪

♪ I WILL FOLLOW WHERE YOU LEAD ♪

SO?

IT'S DEPRESSING.

IT'S BEAUTIFUL.

SHE THROWS HERSELF
UNDER A TRAIN.

BUT I BET SHE LOOKED
GREAT DOING IT.

I DON'T KNOW,

I THINK MAYBE TOLSTOY'S
A LITTLE OVER MY HEAD.

NO, THAT'S NOT TRUE.

TOLSTOY WROTE FOR THE
MASSES, THE COMMON MAN.

IT'S COMPLETELY UNTRUE
THAT YOU HAVE TO BE A GENIUS

TO READ HIS STUFF. YEAH, BUT...

NOW, I KNOW IT'S BIG. VERY BIG.

AND LONG. VERY, VERY LONG.

AND MANY RUSSIAN
NAMES TEND TO BE SPELLED

VERY SIMILARLY,
MAKING IT CONFUSING.

EVERY SINGLE PERSON'S
NAME ENDS WITH "SKY."

NOW HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE?

BUT IT'S ONE OF MY
FAVORITE BOOKS.

AND I KNOW IF YOU
JUST GIVE IT A TRY...

ALL RIGHT. I'LL...
I'LL TRY AGAIN.

REALLY? YEAH.

YOU WON'T BE SORRY.

COFFEE? PLEASE.

MAN. I THOUGHT CHRISTMAS
WAS A BIG DEAL AROUND HERE.

WELL, THIS IS A TOWN THAT
LIKES THE CELEBRATING.

LAST YEAR, WE HAD A
MONTH-LONG CARNIVAL

WHEN WE FINALLY GOT OFF
THE SEPTIC TANK SYSTEM.

A MONTH LONG? YOU'RE KIDDING.

NO.

THERE WERE RIDES,
AND A PETTING ZOO,

AND BALLOON ANIMALS,
AND A FREAK SHOW.

UH-HUH.

OK, YOU, UH, ALMOST HAD ME
GOING THERE FOR A SECOND.

WELL, WE DID HAVE A
RIBBON-CUTTING CEREMONY.

SO WHAT ARE YOU
DOING FRIDAY NIGHT?

WELL, I'VE GOT THE USUAL

FRIDAY NIGHT
GRANDPARENTS' DINNER.

BUT I THOUGHT MAYBE IF
WE GET BACK EARLY ENOUGH,

YOU AND I SHOULD GO WATCH
SOME OF THE BONFIRE TOGETHER.

I MEAN, IT'S KIND OF CORNY,
BUT IT'S REALLY PRETTY.

AND THEY SELL
STAR-SHAPED HOT DOGS.

HOW ABOUT IF YOU
GET OUT OF DINNER

AT YOUR GRANDPARENTS' THIS WEEK?

I DON'T THINK SO.

WHAT IF IT'S FOR A
REALLY SPECIAL OCCASION?

WELL, THAT SPECIAL
OCCASION BETTER INCLUDE

MY BEING RELOCATED
TO A PLASTIC BUBBLE

IF MY GRANDMOTHER'S
GONNA LET ME OUT OF DINNER.

THERE MUST BE ANOTHER
EXCUSE THAT YOU COULD USE.

LIKE WHAT?

LIKE IT'S YOUR 3-MONTH
ANNIVERSARY WITH YOUR BOYFRIEND.

IT IS?

YEAH.

3 MONTHS FROM YOUR BIRTHDAY.

I MEAN, THAT'S WHEN I
GAVE YOU THE BRACELET,

AND THAT'S WHEN I FIGURE
THIS WHOLE THING STARTED.

WOW! 3 MONTHS!

ACTUALLY, YOUR BIRTHDAY
WAS ON A SATURDAY,

SO, REALLY, IT SHOULD BE
SATURDAY, BUT I WORK SATURDAY

AND I PLANNED THIS
WHOLE BIG THING.

SO I THOUGHT MAYBE
WE COULD DO IT FRIDAY.

WHAT WHOLE BIG THING?

JUST THIS ONCE,
MISS DINNER. PLEASE.

DON'T MAKE ME THROW
MYSELF UNDER A TRAIN.

I'LL SEE WHAT I CAN DO.

THANK YOU.

YOU'RE WELCOME.

IT'S OUR 3-MONTH ANNIVERSARY.

YEAH, IT IS.

I FEEL KINDA STUPID THAT I
DIDN'T EVEN KNOW ABOUT THIS.

THAT'S QUITE ALL RIGHT.

I MEAN, I FEEL REALLY BAD

THAT I MISSED OUR
2-MONTH ANNIVERSARY.

QUITE ALL RIGHT, TOO.

HOW WAS IT?

PRETTY GOOD. I'M GLAD.

♪ HEAVENLY, HEAVENLY ♪

♪ NO OTHER LOVE ♪

♪ WAS MEANT TO BE MINE ♪

♪ BUT PERFECTLY, HEAVENLY ♪

NO. PUT THAT AWAY.

I WANT TO COOK.

YOU CAN MAKE SOUP.

NO, I WANT TO REALLY COOK
LIKE ON THE FOOD CHANNEL.

I WANT TO SAUTE THINGS,

AND CHOP THINGS,
AND DO THE "BAM!"

AND I WANT TO ARRANGE
THINGS ON A PLATE.

I WANT TO BE THE IRON CHEF.

FINE. REALLY?

YEAH, I'LL HELP.

OK. I NEED A PAN.

AND A FIRE EXTINGUISHER.

FUNNY, FUNNY GIRL.

NOW, IF I'D ONLY BOUGHT
SOME HAMBURGER.

YOU DIDN'T BUY HAMBURGER?

YES, I BOUGHT HAMBURGER.

I JUST LIKE SAYING
THINGS LIKE THAT

SO YOU LOOK AT
ME LIKE I'M CRAZY.

SO TELL ME, WHY THE
SUDDEN NEED TO BE DOMESTIC?

UH, I DON'T KNOW. I'M
IN, LIKE, A FUNKY MOOD.

WHY?

TOO MANY STARS, TOO MUCH
LOVE. IT MAKES ME CRANKY.

I TAKE IT YOU HAVEN'T
HEARD FROM MR. MEDINA.

NO, I HAVEN'T.

MAYBE THAT'S WHY YOU'RE CRANKY.

OK, NEW SUBJECT, PLEASE.

YOU KNOW, YOU HAVE A PHONE ALSO.

HOW'S IT COMING WITH THAT PAN?

CLEOPATRA, QUEEN OF DENIAL.

THE PAN, CHUCKY. PLEASE.

OK, FINE. NEW TOPIC.

THANK YOU.

I HAVE THIS HUGE
FAVOR TO ASK YOU.

OH, SOMETHING I CAN
HOLD OVER YOUR HEAD.

LET'S HEAR IT.

FRIDAY NIGHT IS DEAN'S AND
MY 3-MONTH ANNIVERSARY.

3 MONTHS? WOW!

AND DEAN APPARENTLY HAS SOME
BIG, FANCY EVENING PLANNED FOR US.

VERY CLASSY OF HIM.

YES, IT IS.

BUT FOR ME TO ACTUALLY PARTAKE

OF THE AFORESAID FANCY EVENING,

I HAVE TO GET OUT OF
FRIDAY NIGHT DINNER.

AH! YEAH. GOOD LUCK WITH THAT.

MOM.

DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH
EMILY GILMORE WILL NOT CARE

ABOUT YOUR 3-MONTH ANNIVERSARY?

I WAS THINKING YOU
COULD TALK TO HER.

IF THERE WAS A RUNOFF

BETWEEN WHAT EMILY GILMORE
WOULD CARE ABOUT LESS:

A 2-FOR-ONE TOILET PAPER SALE
OR YOUR 3-MONTH ANNIVERSARY,

YOUR ANNIVERSARY
WOULD WIN. HANDS DOWN.

SO YOU'RE NOT EVEN
GONNA TRY TO HELP ME?

NO, I'M GONNA TRY TO
HELP YOU BECAUSE I CARE.

EMILY GILMORE, HOWEVER...

PHONE, PLEASE.

OK.

WHAT?

NOTHING. IT'S JUST...

"OH, HEY, MOM, UH,

RORY AND DEAN ARE HAVING THEIR
3-MONTH ANNIVERSARY ON FRIDAY."

"REALLY, LORELAI? WHY, THAT'S
WONDERFUL. I'M THRILLED."

STOP.

"3 MONTHS. WELL, WHOO-HOO!

HOLD ON. I'M GOING
TO CARTWHEEL."

FORGET IT.

OH, NO, WAIT. SHE'S
TELLING MY DAD NOW.

WHY, I THINK THEY'RE
CABBAGE PATCHING.

THAT'S IT. FIND YOUR OWN PAN.

HELLO? UH, MOM?

LORELAI?

UH, YES.

HI. HELLO.

HOW ARE YOU DOING?

I'M DOING FINE.

OH, THAT'S GOOD.

I'M PLEASED.

AND HOW'S DAD?

WHAT DO YOU WANT, LORELAI?

UM, OH, I WAS JUST
CALLING TO SAY HELLO.

AND NOW YOU HAVE.

OK, GOOD.

WAS THERE ANYTHING ELSE THAT
YOU WANTED TO ADD TO THAT HELLO?

WELL, AS A MATTER
OF FACT, THERE IS.

AHA!

UM, UH, YOU KNOW RORY?

YES, I BELIEVE I DO.

SHE WANTED TO SAY HELLO, TOO.

LORELAI, I'M LATE FOR A MEETING.

I'D LOVE TO KNOW WHY.

UH, MOM, JUST HEAR ME OUT, OK?

UH, AND DON'T SAY ANYTHING.

UM, SEE, FRIDAY NIGHT

IS RORY AND DEAN'S
3-MONTH ANNIVERSARY.

WHILE THAT MIGHT NOT
SEEM A VERY BIG DEAL TO YOU,

IT IS TO THEM.

AND I'M GONNA ASK
YOU TO DO SOMETHING

YOU ARE SO NOT GONNA WANNA DO.

I'M BEGGING YOU TO LOOK
AT IT FROM HER POINT OF VIEW

AND MAYBE, JUST MAYBE,

LET HER, JUST THIS ONCE,
NOT COME TO DINNER ON FRIDAY.

ALL RIGHT.

WHAT?

SINCE THIS IS A SPECIAL
OCCASION, I SUPPOSE

IT WOULD BE FINE IF RORY
MISSED DINNER ON FRIDAY.

IT WOULD? YES.

MOM. ARE YOU SURE?

I BELIEVE I AM.

NO ARGUMENTS? NO.

WELL, SHE WON'T BE THERE.

I UNDERSTAND.

AT ALL. I HEARD.

ALL NIGHT LONG.

I ASSUMED AS MUCH.

OK. OK.

ALL RIGHT. ANYTHING ELSE?

UH, YOU KNOW, SHE'S
GONNA NEED SOME HELP

GETTING READY FOR THE
BIG NIGHT, MOM. SO I SHOULD...

WE'LL SEE YOU AT 7:00.

OK. RIGHT. BYE.

SO?

THE WORLD IS OFFICIALLY
COMING TO AN END.

AND THEY'RE OFF.

THE BELL JUST RANG
3 SECONDS AGO.

HOW DID THEY GET
LIP-LOCKED SO FAST?

I WANT A BOYFRIEND
TO MAKE OUT WITH.

TY TALLSON LIKES YOU.

I WANT A DIFFERENT
BOYFRIEND TO MAKE OUT WITH.

I CAN'T GET TO MY LOCKER.

I'M SURE THEY'LL
MOVE IF YOU ASK NICE.

YOU KNOW, DANGLE A HOTEL
KEY IN FRONT OF THEIR FACES.

THIS IS A SCHOOL. YOU
DON'T DO THIS IN A SCHOOL.

NO, NOT UNLESS YOU'VE
GOT A BOYFRIEND LIKE TRISTIN.

THEN YOU DO IT ANYWHERE YOU CAN.

STREET CORNER. SHOPPING MALL.

PHONE BOOTH. STARBUCKS.

THANK YOU FOR THE
WHERE-TO-MAKE-OUT LIST.

I JUST NEED TO GET MY BOOKS.

HELL HATH NO FURY.

EXCUSE ME. YOU'RE IN MY WAY.

HEY, SPAWN IN FRONT OF
SOMEBODY ELSE'S LOCKER, PLEASE.

I'M ASSUMING YOUR LOCKER'S
IN THERE SOMEWHERE ALSO.

YUP, RIGHT BEHIND BELLE WATLING.

HAVE YOU TRIED TO
GET THEIR ATTENTION?

SURE HAVE.

NO LUCK? NO.

GOD, LOOK AT THAT.

IT'S LIKE HE'S EATING HER FACE.

OK, THAT'S IT. I'M
GETTING THE FIRE HOSE.

LET ME TRY FIRST.

HEY, COULD YOU TWO JUST
MOVE THIS WHOLE THING

DOWN TO THE LEFT A LITTLE?

WHAT?

YOU'RE STANDING IN
FRONT OF THE LOCKERS.

OUR LOCKERS.

OH, I'M SORRY.

JUST GOT A LITTLE CARRIED AWAY.

RIGHT.

HEY, PARIS.

HEY.

YOU SHOULD GET BANGS.

THANKS FOR THE TIP.

YOU HAVE A LONG FOREHEAD.

BANGS WOULD HIDE THAT.

HEY, PARTY AT MY HOUSE SATURDAY.

DRESS TO IMPRESS, PLEASE.

COME? OH, I DON'T KNOW.

YOU COULD BRING YOUR BOYFRIEND.

I'LL SEE.

SO, MEET ME AFTER BIOLOGY?

AND IF I DON'T?

YOU WILL.

OH, YES, I WILL.

AH! TO BE YOUNG AND IN LOVE.

WHAT A SHAME ELIZABETH
BARRETT BROWNING

WASN'T HERE TO WITNESS THIS.

SHE'D PUT HER HEAD
THROUGH A WALL.

OH, NOW, PEOPLE,
THIS IS A KITCHEN.

AT LEAST WEAR SOME HAIRNETS.

OH, LORELAI, HELLO.
UH, WE WERE, UH...

JUST DISCUSSING JAM MAKING.

JACKSON'S GONNA START
MAKING, UH, JAM AND PRESERVES.

MAYBE TOMATO SAUCE.

YEAH, THERE'S A WHOLE
WORLD OUT THERE

BEYOND, YOU KNOW,
GROWING VEGETABLES.

NO COFFEE?

SORRY.

THAT'S OK.

RESUME SMOOCHING.

THANK YOU.

NO, CHERIE. I CAN'T WAIT EITHER.

VERY SOON.

YOU ARE?

OH, DON'T TEASE ME.

I PROMISE ALL THIS WAITING
WILL BE WORTHWHILE.

I'LL SEE YOU THEN.

GOOD-GOODBYE, DARLING.

SO HOW'S MOM?

AND WHILE NORMALLY I
WOULD LOOK FORWARD

TO A GOOD VERBAL SPARRING MATCH,

TODAY I SAY NO.

MY HEART IS LIGHT,
THE WORLD IS FINE,

AND I HAVE A DATE
FOR SATURDAY NIGHT.

YOUR TURN.

WHAT I NEED NOW IS
LOTS AND LOTS OF COFFEE.

HEADS UP!

HEY, YOU OK?

YEAH, I'M FINE.

MAN!

THAT HAS NEVER HAPPENED BEFORE.

REALLY?

HOW ABOUT THAT.

I WAS ALMOST CRUSHED
BY A PAPIER-MACHE STAR.

HOW'S YOUR DAY?

WELL, IT'S LOOKING
PRETTY GOOD NOW.

COFFEE, PLEASE, AND
A SHOT OF CYNICISM.

SO, WHY SO CHEERY?

I DON'T KNOW. I'M
JUST IN A MOOD.

BUT THERE'S NO PARTICULAR
REASON FOR THIS MOOD?

NO. YOU DON'T BELIEVE ME?

OH, I BELIEVE YOU.

YOU SAY THERE'S NO
REASON FOR THE MOOD,

THEN THERE'S NO
REASON FOR THE MOOD.

SIMPLY NUTS.

OR BIPOLAR. THAT'S
VERY BIG NOWADAYS.

NO, NO, PATTY, YOU'RE WRONG.

THEY BUILT THE FIRE TO
THROW THEMSELVES ON IT

WHEN THEIR FAMILIES FOUND THEM.

TAYLOR, YOU'RE CRAZY.
THEY BUILT THE FIRE

SO THEY COULD STAY WARM
THEIR FIRST NIGHT HERE.

PATTY, I AM THE
RECORDING SECRETARY

FOR THE STARS
HOLLOW CITY COUNCIL.

I THINK I KNOW HOW
MY TOWN WAS FOUNDED.

CAN NOBODY TALK
ABOUT ANYTHING ELSE

BUT THIS STUPID FESTIVAL?

THAT CAME OUT A LOT LOUDER

THAN IT WAS SUPPOSED
TO, DIDN'T IT? YUP.

THIS FESTIVAL IS COMMEMORATING

THE FOUNDING OF OUR
TOWN, YOUNG LADY.

I KNOW, TAYLOR. I'M SORRY.

SHE'S BIPOLAR.

REALLY? BUT YOU'RE SO YOUNG.

UH, CAN I GET YOU
TWO ANYTHING ELSE?

OH, NO, THANK YOU, SWEETHEART.

I DON'T WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME.

THIS IS A BEAUTIFUL FESTIVAL.
PEOPLE SHOULD BE ENJOYING IT.

IT'S A CRAZY FESTIVAL
BASED ON A NUTTY MYTH

ABOUT 2 LUNATICS WHO IN ALL
PROBABILITY DID NOT EVEN EXIST.

EVEN IF THEY DID,

THEY PROBABLY DROPPED DEAD
OF DIPHTHERIA BEFORE AGE 24.

THE TOWN OF STARS HOLLOW
PROBABLY GOT ITS NAME

FROM THE LOCAL
DANCE HALL PROSTITUTE.

2 RICH DRUNK GUYS
WHO MADE UP THE STORY

TO MAKE IT LOOK
GOOD ON A POSTER.

YOU'RE FULL OF
HATE AND LOATHING,

AND I GOT TO TELL YOU I LOVE IT.

OH, IT'S SO GOOD TO HAVE
SOMEONE TO SHARE THIS HATE WITH.

MY PLEASURE.

MORE COFFEE? YEAH, PLEASE.

HEY, TOMORROW, IF YOU HAVE TIME,

I'M PLANNING ON DESPISING
EVERYONE WHO SAYS,

"HEY, HOW'S IT GOING?"

YOU'RE ON.

HEY, HOW'S IT GOING?

OH, NO, THAT'S JUST TOO EASY.

RACHEL.

RACHEL? YOUR RACHEL?

YOU'RE RACHEL?

YUP, I'M RACHEL.

WHAT ARE YOU...

I MEAN, I THOUGHT
YOU WERE IN THE CONGO

OR PHILADELPHIA OR SOMETHING.

ACTUALLY, THOUGH VERY SIMILAR

TO BOTH THE CONGO
AND PHILADELPHIA,

I, UH, I WAS IN THE MIDEAST.

GUESS THAT POSTCARD
MUST HAVE GOTTEN LOST.

YEAH, WELL, THINGS ARE
PRETTY CRAZY OVER THERE.

NOT A LOT OF WRITING TIME.

BUT I FINISHED UP MY ASSIGNMENT,

AND I FLEW BACK TO CHICAGO

AND I WAS WALKING
THROUGH O'HARE,

AND I LOOK UP AND THERE'S A
PLANE LEAVING FOR HARTFORD

IN, LIKE, 20 MINUTES.

AND ALL OF A SUDDEN, I'M ON IT.

NICE STORY.

I SHOULD HAVE CALLED.

NO, YOU... IT'S FINE.

YOU LOOK GOOD.

THANKS.

YOU, UM...

YOU LOOK...

YOU...

YOU, UH, LOOK...

HE THINKS YOU LOOK GOOD, TOO.

RIGHT? RIGHT.

AND... AND YOU DO.

THANK YOU.

I'M LORELAI.

OH, YEAH, SHE'S LORELAI.

I'M LUKE'S FRIEND.

YEAH, SHE, UH, UH, WORKS
AT THE INDEPENDENCE INN.

I RUN IT, ACTUALLY.

SORRY, SHE...

RUNS IT.

WOW, I... I LOVE THAT PLACE.

THAT MUST BE A PRETTY BIG JOB.

IT IS. IT'S CRAZY.

THERE'S ALWAYS
SOMETHING HAPPENING.

LIKE, UH, WE PUT THESE
COFFEEMAKERS IN ALL THE ROOMS

AND ONLY HALF OF THEM WORK.
THEY JUST SHAKE AND GURGLE

LIKE THEY'RE HAVING
SOME KIND OF A FIT.

WHY WERE YOU IN THE MIDEAST?

I, UH, I WAS DOING A PHOTO STORY

ON HOW PALESTINIAN
AND ISRAELI FAMILIES

HAVE BEEN AFFECTED
BY THE VIOLENCE.

AH, WELL, SO YOU UNDERSTAND
ABOUT THE JOB PRESSURE.

YEAH.

I'M GONNA GO.

PLEASE DON'T LET
ME DRIVE YOU AWAY.

THAT-THAT'S OK, YOU'RE NOT.

I HAVE TO GO SIT IN A
CLOSET OR SOMETHING.

SO, IT WAS REALLY
NICE TO MEET YOU.

YEAH, YOU, TOO.

OK. BYE.

SO.

HI.

HI.

"OH, WE GOT NEW COFFEEMAKERS."

AH! WHAT WAS I THINKING?

WELL, YOU SPENT A LOT OF TIME

PICKING OUT THOSE COFFEEMAKERS.

OH, YEAH, I'M MRS. COFFEE.

OW, OK, I'M STILL
ATTACHED TO THE HEAD.

OK, SORRY, I... I AM
A LITTLE WORKED UP.

MOM, IT'S JUST
LUKE'S EX-GIRLFRIEND.

I KNOW. I JUST HATE
THAT I MADE MYSELF

LOOK SO STUPID IN FRONT OF...

LUKE? NO, RACHEL.

SHE WAS STANDING
THERE, FRESH OFF A PLANE.

SHE HAD NO PLANE
HAIR AT ALL, MIGHT I ADD.

AND WHAT EXACTLY IS PLANE HAIR?

YOU KNOW. IT'S ALL
BIG AND ALL BAAH.

GOT IT.

AND HE'S LOOKING AT HER
LIKE SHE'S MISS SEPTEMBER.

AND SHE'S LOOKING AT
HIM LIKE HE'S JOHNNY DEPP.

AND I WAS JUST
BABBLING LIKE A MORON.

WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME? OW.

OW, OK, YOU ARE NOW
OFFICIALLY OFF HAIR DUTY.

I'M SORRY. I JUST...

NO, IT'S OK. I JUST
THINK IT'S A LITTLE EARLY

FOR DEAN TO SEE
ME COMPLETELY BALD.

RIGHT. THAT'S MORE
A 6-MONTH THING.

SO WHAT'S GOING ON WITH YOU?

I DON'T KNOW.

IT'S JUST ALL THIS LOVE
IN THE AIR, YOU KNOW.

I MISS MAX.

THERE'S BEEN SO MUCH GOING
ON WITH YOUR DAD COMING HOME

AND FAMILY STUFF AND
YOUR CONSTANT EXISTENCE.

THANKS FOR THE LOVE.

ANY TIME.

SO, I HAVEN'T HAD A LOT
OF TIME TO FOCUS ON IT,

AND I MISS MAX.

I KNOW.

I HAD A DREAM ABOUT
HIM THE OTHER NIGHT.

REALLY? DIRTY?

NO, ABSOLUTELY NOT.

AND WHEN YOU'RE 21, I'LL
TELL YOU THE REAL ANSWER.

ANYWAY, IT'S PUT ME
IN A FUNK SINCE THEN.

I'M SORRY. UH, ME, TOO.

WE COULD TALK
ABOUT ME FOR YEARS,

AND BELIEVE ME, WE WILL.

BUT LET'S FOCUS ON YOU,
THE LADY OF THE EVENING.

NO HOOKER REFERENCE INTENDED.

GLAD TO HEAR IT.

NOW, WHAT ARE YOU
GONNA WEAR WITH THAT?

YOU TELL ME.

UH, WHERE IS HE TAKING YOU?

WHY?

WELL, YOU DON'T WANT
TO CLASH WITH THE DECOR.

A LADY PLANS AHEAD.

WELL, IF YOU MUST KNOW,
HE'S TAKING ME TO ANDELORO'S.

OH, ISN'T THAT ROMANTIC.

I KNOW.

WOW, IT'S GONNA BE JUST
LIKE LADY AND THE TRAMP.

YOU'LL SHARE A
PLATE OF SPAGHETTI,

BUT IT'LL JUST BE
ONE LONG STRAND.

YOU WON'T REALIZE IT UNTIL YOU
ACCIDENTALLY MEET IN THE MIDDLE.

AND THEN, HE'LL PUSH A MEATBALL
TOWARDS YOU WITH HIS NOSE

AND YOU'LL PUSH IT
BACK WITH YOUR NOSE.

AND THEN, YOU'LL BRING
THE MEATBALL HOME

AND SAVE IT IN THE
REFRIGERATOR FOR YEARS...

MOM?

UH, NEITHER. JUST
WEAR YOUR COAT.

BUT YOUR FLOWER'S
JUST A LITTLE SMUSHED.

RORY?

THERE YOU GO. YOU'RE ALL SET.

IS ANYONE HERE?

YOU ALL RIGHT?

OH, YEAH. YOU
LOOK BEAUTIFUL. GO.

LANE?

OH, MY GOD!

I JUST CAN'T BELIEVE IT! I KNOW.

I MEAN, 3 MONTHS!

THAT'S, LIKE, 1/64th
OF YOUR LIFE! I KNOW.

I HAVE TO STOP
HANGING OUT WITH YOU.

I MEAN, YOU'RE JUST MAKING
MY LIFE SEEM TOO PATHETIC.

JOIN THE CLUB.

ARE YOU GOING TO THE FESTIVAL?

'CAUSE MAYBE WE COULD
MEET YOU THERE LATER.

OH, YEAH, THAT
WOULD BE ROMANTIC.

LANE. YES, I'M GOING
TO THE FESTIVAL,

AND WOULD YOU LIKE
TO KNOW WHY? UH-OH.

MY MOTHER HAS
ONCE AGAIN SET ME UP.

ANOTHER FUTURE DOCTOR?

A FUTURE CHIROPRACTOR.

SHE'S LOSING CONFIDENCE
IN MY PROSPECTS.

MAYBE HE'LL BE NICE.
OH, IT'S NOT JUST HIM.

WE'RE GOING WITH HIS
PARENTS, HIS GRANDPARENTS,

2 SISTERS, 3 BROTHERS, AND
AT LEAST ONE MAIDEN AUNT.

THAT'S DEAN.

REMEMBER, YOU HAVE
TO TELL ME EVERYTHING.

OK, YOU, TOO.

OH, YEAH, AFTER THE
WALKING, THE SILENCE,

THE SITTING, AND THE BYE-BYE,

THAT'S WHEN THE FUN WILL BEGIN.

I WANT TO KNOW, ANYHOW.

BYE, MOM.

BYE, HONEY. HAVE FUN.

DON'T FORGET THE MEATBALL.

THE MEATBALL?

IT'S A MOTHER-DAUGHTER THING.

SO, THINK I COULD HANG
OUT WITH YOU FOR A WHILE?

OH, UH, NOT UNLESS YOU
WANT TO GO TO HARTFORD.

BESIDES, DIDN'T
ANYONE EVER TELL YOU

IT'S NOT POLITE TO
KEEP 15 PROSPECTIVE

KOREAN IN-LAWS WAITING?

YOU COULD RUN OVER
ME ON YOUR WAY OUT.

MAYBE MY MOTHER WOULDN'T
MAKE ME GO IF I WAS IN A HOSPITAL.

I WOULDN'T COUNT ON IT.

YEAH, YOU'RE RIGHT.

YOU'RE LATE.

HOW DID YOU DO THAT? WHAT?

ANSWER THE DOOR BEFORE
I EVEN RANG THE BELL?

I THOUGHT I HEARD SOMETHING.

I CAME TO THE DOOR.
YOU WERE THERE.

COME IN, PLEASE.

YOU THOUGHT YOU HEARD SOMETHING?

YES.

MOM, THAT DOOR IS,
LIKE, 10 FEET THICK.

SO?

SO, IT WASN'T LIKE I WAS STANDING
OUT THERE WITH A BAND OF JACKALS.

I WAS JUST DRINKING COFFEE.

LORELAI, WHAT IS IT
THAT YOU WANT TO HEAR?

THAT I WAS STANDING BY THE
WINDOW, STARING OUT AT THE DRIVEWAY,

WAITING TO POUNCE THE
MOMENT YOU ARRIVED?

YES, BECAUSE BELIEVE IT OR
NOT, THAT WOULD BE LESS CREEPY.

GET YOURSELF A DRINK, PLEASE.

♪

HEY, DAD.

LORELAI.

SORRY I'M LATE.

I WAS HELPING RORY GET
READY FOR HER BIG DATE

AND, WELL, YOU KNOW GIRLS.

MMM-HMM.

SO,

UM, HOW'S WORK?

OH, WORK IS FINE.

YEAH? GOOD. GOOD.

MY WORK'S FINE, TOO.

MMM-HMM?

AHEM. OH, GOD.

MOM HAS GONE A LITTLE CRAZY
WITH THE FIGURINES HERE, HUH?

A LITTLE KATHY BATES?

ALTHOUGH, YOU PROBABLY HAVEN'T
SEEN MISERY, WHICH IS A GOOD THING.

'CAUSE RORY COULDN'T SLEEP ALONE

FOR A WEEK AFTER WE WATCHED IT.

THAT WOULDN'T BE A PROBLEM FOR
YOU 'CAUSE YOU DON'T SLEEP ALONE.

I'M GUESSING. I DON'T KNOW

WHAT YOUR AND MOM'S
SLEEPING ARRANGEMENT IS.

NOW I'M WISHING I
HADN'T BROUGHT IT UP

BECAUSE IT'S SUCH A "WOW, DON'T
WANT TO GO THERE" SUBJECT FOR ME.

NOT FOR YOU, BECAUSE YOU SHOULD DEFINITELY
GO THERE IF YOU... WELL, ANYWAY...

OH, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE NOW?

NOTHING, UH, WELL, I'M PUTTING THE
BUNNY BACK WITH HIS LITTLE FRIENDS

AND I JUST ABOUT... SORT OF
MASSACRED THEM A LITTLE BIT.

BUT, THAT'S LIFE IN
THE JUNGLE, ISN'T IT?

JUST SIT DOWN, PLEASE.

OK. SORRY.

JUST SIT WITH YOUR
HANDS IN YOUR LAP.

AHEM. SORRY.

AND I'M TRYING TO READ.

SO PLEASE, JUST BE QUIET, AND
TRY NOT TO BREAK ANYTHING ELSE.

SO, WE HAVING A NICE CHAT?

YEAH, WE'RE HAVING A GREAT
CONVERSATION, ME AND MORRIE.

EXCUSE ME? NOTHING.

THANKS, MOM, FOR LETTING RORY OUT
OF DINNER. SHE REALLY APPRECIATED IT.

WELL, SHE DESERVES TO CELEBRATE.

A 3-MONTH ANNIVERSARY IS A
LANDMARK FEAT AT HER AGE.

OR AT ANY AGE, FOR SOME PEOPLE.

I WAS GONNA GET A DRINK.
I'M GONNA GET RIGHT ON THAT.

I'LL GET THAT.

CAN I FRESHEN UP
YOUR DRINK, DAD?

NO, THANK YOU. ONE DRINK
BEFORE DINNER IS QUITE ENOUGH.

RIGHT. SORRY.

I HAD NO IDEA IT WAS SO CLOSE.

ABSOLUTELY. RIGHT
AROUND THE CORNER.

WHAT A SMALL WORLD.

LORELAI, I'D LIKE YOU TO
MEET CHASE BRADFORD.

HEY. HI.

HE WAS JUST TELLING ME

THAT HE GREW UP RIGHT
AROUND THE CORNER FROM HERE.

OH, REALLY?

STONE HOUSE ON THE CORNER.

OH, THE ONE WITH THE DOBERMANS.

THAT'S RIGHT. LEOPOLD AND LOEB.

I'M AFRAID THEY PASSED
ON QUITE A FEW YEARS AGO.

POSTMEN FINALLY
GOT ORGANIZED, HUH?

UH, CHASE, THIS IS
MY HUSBAND, RICHARD.

HOW DO YOU DO?

FINE, RICHARD. JUST FINE.

UH, PLEASE, SIT DOWN.

EMILY, I DIDN'T KNOW WE WERE
HAVING COMPANY FOR DINNER.

OH, WELL, IT WAS JUST SORT OF
A SPUR-OF-THE-MOMENT THING.

CHASE'S MOTHER AND I
ARE IN THE D.A.R. TOGETHER

AND HE'S JUST MOVED BACK TO
HARTFORD AND IT SEEMED LIKE A NICE IDEA.

YES, VERY NICE.

CHASE, CAN I GET YOU A DRINK?

A SCOTCH, NEAT.

UH, GLENFIDDICH? FINE.

SO, LORELAI, YOUR MOTHER'S
TOLD ME ALL ABOUT YOU.

REALLY? OH, YES.

I'M JUST SORRY YOUR DAUGHTER
COULDN'T JOIN US FOR DINNER.

I ADORE CHILDREN.

MOM, COULD I TALK
TO YOU FOR A MINUTE?

LORELAI, WE HAVE COMPANY.

IT'LL JUST TAKE A
SECOND, REALLY.

BUT... COME ON, IT'LL BE FUN.

EXCUSE US. WE'RE GONNA HAVE A
SPUR-OF-THE-MOMENT CONVERSATION.

YOU'RE PUSHING ME.

IS THIS A SETUP? WHAT?

UH, CONNECTICUT KEN IN THERE.

IS HE MY INVITED
ESCORT FOR THE EVENING?

HIS MOTHER IS A FRIEND OF MINE.

AND?

HE JUST MOVED BACK HERE.
HE DOESN'T KNOW ANYONE.

AND?

I THOUGHT HE MIGHT
ENJOY MEETING YOU.

AHA!

PUT THAT FINGER DOWN.

AH, THIS IS WHY THE
MISS CONGENIALITY ACT

WHEN RORY WANTED
TO BEG OUT OF DINNER.

IT JUST SEEMED LIKE
A GOOD OPPORTUNITY.

MOM, THANK YOU FOR THE
THOUGHT, BUT I CAN GET MY OWN MEN.

REALLY? YES, REALLY.

I MUST DISAGREE.

YOU MUST?

CHASE IS A QUALITY MAN.

HE HAS GOOD BREEDING.

HE COMES FROM A NICE FAMILY.

HE MAKES A NICE LIVING.

HE'S ATTRACTIVE.

MOM, MMM-MMM, NO.

IS IT GONNA KILL YOU TO SIMPLY
KEEP AN OPEN MIND ABOUT HIM?

MOM, HE IS NOT MY TYPE.

WHY NOT? BECAUSE I LIKE HIM?

I SWEAR, I DON'T KNOW WHICH ONE,
BUT THERE IS A GAME SHOW OUT THERE

WITH... WITH YOUR NAME ON IT.

WELL, THAT MUST BE IT. YOU'VE
HARDLY SAID 2 WORDS TO THE MAN.

YOU COULDN'T HATE HIM ALREADY.

IT'S THAT ARCADE GAME WHERE THE
MOLE KEEPS STICKING HIS HEAD OUT.

YOU HAVE TO POUND HIM AS MANY
TIMES AS YOU CAN WITH THE MALLET.

YOU WOULD BE A MASTER AT THAT.

I REALIZE THAT CHASE MAY NOT BE AS
CONTROVERSIAL AS YOUR USUAL BRAND OF MEN.

THEY'D ERECT YOUR STATUE OF
YOU NEXT TO IT WITH PERFECT HAIR,

PEARLS AND A BRONZE MALLET.

I WANT YOU TO THINK
ABOUT SOMETHING.

TONIGHT, YOUR DAUGHTER IS
CELEBRATING HER 3-MONTH ANNIVERSARY.

WHAT WAS THE LAST RELATIONSHIP
YOU HAD THAT LASTED THAT LONG?

I THOUGHT SO.

WELL, HERE WE ARE
AND VERY SORRY.

THAT'S ALL RIGHT. I HAD A
CHANCE TO TELL RICHARD

ABOUT WHAT I DO IN
THE ACTUARIAL BUSINESS.

YES. IT'S FASCINATING.

LORELAI, MAY I FIX YOU
SOMETHING TO DRINK?

HMM, GIN. AND?

GIN.

MAKE THAT 2.

WHAT ABOUT THE
ONE-DRINK-BEFORE-DINNER RULE?

WELL, WE HAVE GUESTS.
WE'RE CELEBRATING.

UH, CHASE, HERE. LET
ME HELP YOU WITH THAT.

THAT WAS REALLY GOOD.

IT WAS? YES, IT WAS.

HOW WAS THE SALAD? GREAT.

WHAT ABOUT THAT CHEESE
BREAD THING? TOO HEAVY?

JUST HEAVY ENOUGH. REALLY?

EVERYTHING WAS PERFECT.

EVEN THE SODA WAS GOOD.

I DON'T KNOW HOW THEY DO IT,

BUT THE COKE HERE IS DEFINITELY
SUPERIOR TO THE COKE ANYWHERE ELSE.

OK. AT WHAT POINT DURING THAT
DID YOU START MAKING FUN OF ME?

I WOULD NEVER MAKE FUN OF YOU.

ESPECIALLY NOT AFTER YOU ORDERED 3
KINDS OF PASTA BECAUSE I COULDN'T DECIDE.

WELL, YOU SHOULDN'T
HAVE TO DECIDE.

TONIGHT YOU SHOULD
HAVE EVERYTHING YOU WANT.

I JUST HAVE TO SAY THAT I AM NOW

A VERY BIG FAN OF THE
3-MONTH ANNIVERSARY.

OH, YEAH? DEFINITELY.

I THINK THEY SHOULD HAVE
T-SHIRTS AND NEWSLETTERS.

WELL, I'M GLAD.

YOU DID ALL THIS FOR ME?

IT'S NOT OVER YET.

WOW! THIS IS JUST
LIKE THAT CHRISTMAS

THAT I GOT A FULL SET OF
ILLUSTRATED ENCYCLOPEDIAS.

♪

I WANTED THEM.

OH. UH, GOOD.

ONE TIRAMISU, 2 FORKS

AND, UH, ONE MEATBALL TO GO.

THANK YOU.

YOU WANT TO EXPLAIN
THE MEATBALL?

IT'S A MOTHER-DAUGHTER THING.

OK, WELL, UH, LADIES FIRST.

THANK YOU.

OK. HAVE I MENTIONED

HOW MUCH I'M LOVING THE
3-MONTH ANNIVERSARY THING?

YEAH, YOU DID.

BECAUSE THIS TIRAMISU IS SO GOOD

THAT IF THE ANNIVERSARY WERE
COMPLETELY SUCKING RIGHT NOW,

THIS WOULD SAVE IT.

WHAT? NOTHING.

STOP IT.

NO, YOU LOOK CUTE.

I'M EATING. WELL, YOU EAT CUTE.

I DO NOT EAT CUTE.
NO ONE EATS CUTE.

BAMBI, MAYBE, BUT
HE'S A CARTOON.

SO, UH, AFTER WE FINISH
HERE, WE MOVE ON TO PHASE 2

OF THE ANNIVERSARY EVENING.

PHASE 2. SOUNDS VERY OFFICIAL.

ARE THERE SPACESUITS INVOLVED?

WITH MATCHING HELMETS.

IMPRESSIVE.

SO, LORELAI, ARE YOU A
MEMBER OF THE D.A.R.?

NO, I'M NOT.

D-A-R-N.

IT'S... I, UH..., IT'S LIKE, DARN,
'CAUSE IT'S A PLAY ON D.A.R.

BOY, THESE CARROTS
SURE ARE TINY.

CHASE, I'M SIMPLY FASCINATED
ABOUT YOUR WORK SITUATION.

TELL US HOW YOU WOUND
UP BACK HERE AT HOME.

I MEAN, YOU MOVE AWAY TO MAKE YOUR
FORTUNE, YOU END UP RIGHT BACK HERE.

ISN'T LIFE FUNNY?

HILARIOUS.

IT'S A COMEDY FOR THE MASSES.

WELL, I WORKED HARD AND THE
COMPANY WAS VERY GOOD TO ME.

YOU KNOW A THING OR TWO ABOUT
COMPANY LOYALTY, I ASSUME, RICHARD.

WELL, THE COMPANY OFFERED ME A
CHOICE OF EAST COAST LOCATIONS.

SORT OF A BIG VOTE OF
CONFIDENCE IN THE JOB I WAS DOING.

PICKING YOUR LOCALE.

IT'S A VERY COVETED
POSITION TO BE IN.

YEAH, I WOULD LIKE TO BE
PICKING MY LOCALE RIGHT NOW.

SO I SAT DOWN AND
MADE MY WISH LIST.

I LOOKED FOR PLACES THAT
OFFERED LOCATION AMENITIES

AS WELL AS JOB GROWTH.

FINALLY, AFTER DAYS OF RESEARCH

CHECKING INTO TRAFFIC
CONDITIONS, UH, CRIME RATES,

THE BEST SCHOOL SYSTEMS, MY
DECISION CAME DOWN TO JUST 2 PLACES.

ONE WAS IN NEW YORK
AND ONE WAS IN HARTFORD.

AND YOU CHOSE HARTFORD.

I DID AT THAT.

EMILY, IS THERE ANY MORE ROAST?

HARTFORD HAS ALL
THE COSMOPOLITAN,

BIG-CITY BENEFITS NEW YORK HAS

WITHOUT ACTUALLY
HAVING TO LIVE IN NEW YORK.

IT JUST SEEMED
LIKE A NO-BRAINER.

I'LL GET DAD SOME MORE ROAST.

LEE WILL BRING IT.

BUT IT'S SO MUCH MORE
PERSONAL THIS WAY.

YEAH, HURRY BACK.

I SIMPLY HAVE TO KNOW WHAT THE
ALLURE OF THIS STARS HOLLOW IS

I'VE HEARD SO MUCH ABOUT.

JUST MILES AND MILES AND MILES.

SO, WHAT BOOK DID YOU BRING?

WHAT?

YOU ALWAYS BRING A BOOK WITH
YOU, AND I WAS JUST WONDERING

WHAT'S THE 3-MONTH
ANNIVERSARY BOOK?

ACTUALLY, I BROUGHT
THE NEW YORKER.

A MAGAZINE. REALLY?

IT'S THE FICTION ISSUE.

PEOPLE OF STARS HOLLOW,
AND OUR MANY FRIENDS.

IT GIVES ME GREAT
PLEASURE TO PRESIDE OVER

OUR ANNUAL "FOUNDERS
FIRELIGHT FESTIVAL"

FOR THE 32ND TIME.

MANY A TRUE LOVE
HAS HAD ITS START

RIGHT ON THE SPOT WHERE I STAND.

AND I DON'T MIND TELLING YOU

THAT AT THIS VERY FESTIVAL,
RIGHT BY THIS GAZEBO,

IS WHERE I MET MY OWN TRUE LOVE

MISS DORA BRAITHWAITE.

AW!

WE HAVE BEEN
MARRIED FOR 43 YEARS

AND IT ALL STARTED RIGHT HERE.

ASK HER TO WAVE.

I CAN'T.

WHY NOT?

SHE WENT TO BINGO IN BRIDGEPORT.

AND NOW, MY FRIENDS,

IF YOU WILL JOIN ME
IN LIGHTING THE FIRE.

OK, TAKE ME TO THE SURPRISE NOW.

BUT I THOUGHT YOU SAID YOU
WANT TO SEE THE BONFIRE BEING LIT.

OH, I DO.

WAIT, BUT MAYOR PORTER SAID...

TRUST ME, IT'S GONNA
BE A WHILE BEFORE IT'S LIT.

WE'LL HAVE PLENTY OF
TIME BEFORE THEY'RE READY.

NO, I DON'T HAVE THEM.

EVERY DAMN YEAR!

IT WAS LENNY'S RESPONSIBILITY!

OH, FOR PETE'S SAKE!

DOES ANYONE HAVE ANY MATCHES?

OH, MY GOD!

IT'S REALLY FASCINATING STUFF.

IT SOUNDS IT. TELL US MORE.

WE'RE BUILDING NEW
STATISTICAL MODELS

THAT LET US DO A BETTER JOB

OF PREDICTING DEATH THAN
WE'VE EVER BEEN ABLE TO DO.

RICHARD, YOU MIGHT
FIND THIS INTERESTING.

I'VE NEVER BEEN ONE FOR
SITTING AT A COMPUTER

BUILDING MODELS, CHASE.

I'M A CLIENT-CONTACT MAN MYSELF.

BUT THESE MODELS GIVE YOU A BETTER
PRODUCT TO SELL TO THOSE CLIENTS.

THAT DOES SOUND INTERESTING.

OH, IT IS.

IN FACT, IF YOU ANSWER A
FEW SIMPLE QUESTIONS FOR ME,

I COULD PRACTICALLY PINPOINT
THE DAY YOU'RE GOING TO DIE.

GOODNESS.

GO AHEAD. ASK HER THE QUESTIONS.

I THINK I'LL PASS.

NO, NO, LORELAI.

I'D HAVE TO FEED THE INFORMATION

INTO A COMPUTER
TO GET THE ANSWER.

I'M NO KRESKIN.

WELL, CHASE, WHY DON'T
YOU AND LORELAI RETIRE

TO THE LIVING ROOM
FOR SOME BRANDY

WHILE I HELP LEE TO CLEAN UP?

WHILE YOU DO WHAT?

THAT SOUNDS LOVELY. SHALL WE?

UH, OH, SURE. I'M
JUST GOING TO, UM,

GO AND POWDER MY SOMETHING.

BUT, I'LL BE BACK IN A MINUTE.

I'LL MEET YOU IN
THE LIVING ROOM.

I'LL BE WAITING.

SUPER.

LORELAI, YOUR MOTHER
WANTS TO KNOW IF...

HI, DADDY.

OK, I... I KNOW THIS IS BAD.

I KNOW THIS PROBABLY BRINGS
BACK ALL THE HORRIBLE ASPECTS

OF MY CHILDHOOD LIFE FOR YOU.

SEE, I'M REALLY SORRY
THAT WE FOUGHT LAST WEEK.

I'M REALLY SORRY YOU'RE
SO DISAPPOINTED IN ME.

I REALLY WISH THERE WAS
SOME WAY I COULD FIX THAT.

BUT THERE ISN'T, AND I ACCEPT
THAT BECAUSE I AM AN ADULT NOW

AND... AND I AM PROUD
OF WHO I HAVE BECOME.

BUT I AM BEGGING YOU, PLEASE, PLEASE
DO NOT MAKE ME GO BACK DOWN THERE

BECAUSE THAT GUY IS BORING.

EMILY, SHE'S NOT UP HERE!

THANK YOU, DADDY.

WE'RE HERE. WE'RE WHERE?

COME ON. DEAN, WHAT IS THIS?

OK, UH, DID YOU
EVER SEE CHRISTINE?

YES.

WELL, IT'S NOTHING
LIKE THAT. COME ON.

♪

YOU BROUGHT ME TO BEIRUT?

IT'S A SALVAGE YARD.

AH. AND YET IT LOOKS
SO MUCH LIKE BEIRUT.

OK, UH...

HERE WE ARE.

WOW.

IT'S A CAR. IT IS?

WELL, IT WILL BE.
WHEN IT GROWS UP?

WHEN I FIX IT.

WHAT?

UM, IT'S YOURS.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT'S MINE?

I MEAN, I'M BUILDING IT
PIECE BY PIECE FOR YOU.

NO.

YEAH. I-I-I STARTED
WITH THE FRAME.

THE SEATS AND THE WINDSHIELD
JUST WENT IN YESTERDAY.

YOU'RE BUILDING ME A CAR?

IT'S GONNA TAKE A WHILE. BUT
WHEN I'M DONE, IT'LL BE GREAT.

YOU'RE BUILDING ME A CAR.
YOU'RE BUILDING ME A CAR.

THAT'S RIGHT.

YOU'RE BUILDING ME A CAR?

I'M BUILDING YOU A CAR.

THIS IS CRAZY. WHY
WOULD YOU DO THIS?

I DON'T KNOW. YOU
DIDN'T HAVE ONE.

YOU'RE COMPLETELY INSANE.

WHAT? I DIDN'T WANT YOU
WASTING TIME ON THE BUS ANYMORE.

I MEAN, THAT IS VERY VALUABLE
TIME WE COULD BE ARGUING

ABOUT YOUR ONGOING OBSESSION

WITH VERY CONFUSING
RUSSIAN AUTHORS.

I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS.

UM,

DO YOU LIKE IT?

DO I LIKE IT? ARE YOU KIDDING?

♪ EVERYTHING IS
CLEAR IN MY HEART ♪

I'LL TAKE THAT AS A YES.

TAKE IT, MISTER.

COME ON, GET IN.

I'LL, UH, I'LL FIX THAT.

DON'T. I LIKE IT LIKE THAT.

♪ OH MY LOVE ♪

♪ FOR THE FIRST
TIME IN MY LIFE ♪

THIS IS AMAZING.

I'M GLAD YOU LIKE IT.

I HAD NO IDEA THAT 3 MONTHS
WAS THE CAR ANNIVERSARY.

4 MONTHS, YOU GET A PLANE.

BOY, RELATIONSHIPS SURE
HAVE CHANGED SINCE I WAS A KID.

♪ FOR THE FIRST
TIME IN MY LIFE ♪

I'M HAVING ONE OF THOSE
MOMENTS RIGHT NOW.

WHAT MOMENTS?

ONE OF THOSE MOMENTS
WHEN EVERYTHING

IS SO PERFECT AND SO WONDERFUL

THAT YOU ALMOST FEEL SAD BECAUSE

NOTHING CAN EVER
BE THIS GOOD AGAIN.

SO,

BASICALLY, I'M DEPRESSING YOU?

YUP.

YOU'RE VERY WEIRD.

AND YOU'RE WONDERFUL.

♪ OH I FEEL LOVE ♪

♪ EVERYTHING IS
CLEAR IN OUR WORLD ♪

RORY.

YEAH?

I LOVE YOU.

RORY?

YEAH.

DID YOU HEAR ME?

UH-HUH.

WELL, SAY SOMETHING.

I... I...

YEAH?

I LOVE THE CAR.

UH...

AND THAT'S... THAT'S IT?

NO, I JUST...

I'M SURPRISED. I DIDN'T
EXPECT... I DON'T...

YOU DON'T LOVE ME?

NO, I JUST HAVE TO THINK
ABOUT IT FOR A MINUTE.

THINK ABOUT WHAT?

WELL, SAYING "I LOVE YOU"
IS A REALLY DIFFICULT THING.

I JUST DID IT.

AND YOU DID IT REALLY WELL.

WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN?

I'M SORRY. I... PLEASE.

THIS TOTALLY CAME
AS A SURPRISE, I MEAN,

WITH... WITH THE DINNER
AND THE CAR AND THEN THE...

I JUST NEED A MINUTE
TO THINK ABOUT IT.

THIS IS NOT SOMETHING
YOU THINK ABOUT, RORY.

THIS IS SOMETHING THAT YOU
EITHER FEEL OR YOU DON'T.

PLEASE DON'T BE MAD.

WHY? BECAUSE I
SAY, "I LOVE YOU,"

AND YOU WANT TO THINK ABOUT IT?

GO HOME AND DISCUSS
IT WITH YOUR MOTHER,

MAKE ONE OF YOUR PRO-CON LISTS?

NOT FAIR.

I'M SORRY.

I'M AN IDIOT. I DON'T EVEN
KNOW WHAT I WAS THINKING.

DEAN.

PLEASE. IT'S JUST
NOT THAT EASY FOR ME.

I MEAN, SAYING "I LOVE
YOU" MEANS A LOT.

THINK ABOUT IT FROM
MY POINT OF VIEW.

I MEAN, MY MOM AND OUR LIFE.

I MEAN, MY MOM SAID THAT
SHE LOVED MY DAD AND THEN...

YOU DON'T GET PREGNANT
SAYING "I LOVE YOU."

I KNOW.

I'M JUST CONFUSED. I NEED TO...

IT'S A REALLY BIG DEAL.

FINE, COME ON.

DEAN, PLEASE DON'T BE MAD.

I'LL TAKE YOU HOME.

DEAN, TONIGHT WAS
AMAZING. IT WAS PERFECT.

PLEASE, I SWEAR, I
JUST NEED A MINUTE...

WHATEVER.

IT DOESN'T MATTER,
ALL RIGHT? LET'S GO.

♪

♪ DEVASTATION AT LAST ♪

♪ FINALLY WE MEET ♪

♪ AND AFTER ALL OF THESE YEARS ♪

♪ OUT HERE ON THE STREET ♪

♪ I HAD A FEELING YOU WOULD ♪

♪ MAKE YOURSELF KNOWN ♪

SOOKIE.

YES, JACKSON?

YOU KNOW WHAT I'M
THINKING ABOUT RIGHT NOW?

THAT TIME I ROASTED SOME RED
PEPPERS OVER THE STOVE BURNER

AND SINGED OFF MY EYEBROWS?

NO. GOOD.

I'M JUST THINKING,
THIS IS REALLY NICE.

ME, TOO.

♪ AND I THOUGHT IF I TOED ♪

♪ THE RIGHT LINES ♪

♪ BUT THESE MOCKINGBIRDS ♪

♪ WON'T LET ME SHINE ♪

♪ DEVASTATION MY DOOR ♪

YOU GETTING SOME GOOD STUFF?

OH, YEAH.

YEAH, THE FIRELIGHT
REALLY CHANGES PEOPLE.

MAKES THEM SEEM HAPPIER, FREER,

ALL THE TROUBLES
COMPLETELY GONE.

I DON'T THINK THAT'S
THE FIRELIGHT.

I THINK IT'S THE FOUNDERS' DAY
PARTY PUNCH THEY'VE BEEN SELLING.

OH, YEAH, THAT STUFF IS GOOD.

OK, AT SOME POINT, ARE YOU GONNA
TELL ME WHAT YOU'RE DOING HERE?

I'M PUTTING MORE
FILM IN MY CAMERA.

RACHEL. WHAT?

I TOLD YOU, I WAS AT THE
AIRPORT, AND NOW I'M HERE.

OH WELL, SURE, WHEN
YOU PUT IT LIKE THAT.

CORRECT ME IF I'M WRONG, BUT YOU
DON'T SOUND ALL THAT HAPPY TO SEE ME.

CORRECT ME IF I'M WRONG,
BUT YOU HAVE A TENDENCY

TO SHOW UP AND THEN
LEAVE QUITE SUDDENLY.

NOT ONE OF YOUR MORE
CHARMING ATTRIBUTES.

SO YOU'RE NOT HAPPY TO SEE ME?

LUKE, I DON'T KNOW
WHAT I'M DOING HERE, OK?

I JUST MISSED YOU.

I WANTED TO SEE YOU.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT ELSE TO SAY.

I MISSED YOU, TOO.

SO, SINCE WE'RE
BOTH BEING BLUNT,

WHAT'S THE DEAL WITH LORELAI?

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

I'M TALKING ABOUT LORELAI.

THE LADY WHO RUNS THE INN, THE ONE
YOU'VE TOLD ME ABSOLUTELY NOTHING ABOUT.

BEEN VERY CAREFUL TO
LEAVE OUT OF ANY STORY,

ANECDOTE, OR GOSSIP
ABOUT THE TOWN.

THERE IS NO DEAL WITH
LORELAI. WE'RE FRIENDS.

FOR NOW. YES.

HMM, AND IN THE FUTURE?

LORELAI IS...

OH, SHE'S JUST, UH...

UH, I MEAN, AT
TIMES, IT SEEMS LIKE...

I DON'T... I DON'T
KNOW, YOU KNOW.

BUT I AM HAPPY TO SEE YOU.

GOOD.

I'M GONNA GET SOME OF THAT
PARTY PUNCH. YOU WANT SOME?

THAT STUFF WILL KILL YOU.

OH, LUKE.

SOME THINGS NEVER CHANGE.

♪ THE RIGHT LINES ♪

♪ BUT THESE MOCKINGBIRDS ♪

♪ WON'T LET ME SHINE ♪

♪ AND I THOUGHT IF I TOED ♪

♪ THE RIGHT LINES ♪

HI.

WHERE'S THE FIRE DEPARTMENT
WHEN YOU NEED THEM?

AREN'T YOU SUPPOSED
TO BE IN HARTFORD?

YEAH. WHAT HAPPENED?

I CLIMBED OUT THE
WINDOW. OH, OK.

THAT'S IT? YOU'RE
NOT CURIOUS WHY?

NO.

THAT'S WHAT I LOVE ABOUT YOU.

HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN HERE?

A LITTLE WHILE.

DID YOU SEE TAYLOR AND
HARRY GET INTO A FISTFIGHT?

NO! YEAH, IT WAS...

OH, HOW DID I MISS
THAT? I'M SO BUMMED.

IT WAS GOOD.

SO, WHERE IS RACHEL?

UH, SHE'S A FOUNDERS'
PARTY PUNCH JUNKIE.

GOD, EVEN THE NICE
GIRLS AREN'T SAFE.

YEAH, SHE'S BEEN RUNNING AROUND
HERE, TAKING ALL KINDS OF PICTURES.

SHE'S HAVING A GOOD TIME.

I GUESS SO. I HOPE SO.

SO?

YES?

SO, WHAT'S THE, UH,
HAPS WITH YOU TWO?

THE HAPS? WELL, LET'S SEE.

WHAT IS THE HAPS?

I MEAN, LIKE, YOU KNOW...

I KNOW WHAT YOU
MEANT BY "THE HAPS."

YOU'RE REPEATING
IT A THOUSAND TIMES.

I WAS PONDERING.

YOU PONDER REALLY SLOWLY.

IF I DID IT FAST, IT
WOULDN'T BE PONDERING.

PONDERING BY NATURE
HAS A SLOW CONNOTATION.

OK, FINE, FINE. IT'S OK.

IS SHE, UM, STAYING?

I DON'T KNOW.

DO YOU WANT HER TO?

I DON'T KNOW.

SHE SEEMS TO REALLY LIKE YOU.

YEAH, SHE DOES.

BUT SHE DOESN'T HAVE THE
GREATEST ATTENTION SPAN.

YEAH. BUT SHE IS HERE.

YES, SHE IS.

I DON'T KNOW, YOU SPEND A
LOT OF TIME DEBATING THINGS.

YOU KNOW, IS IT
RIGHT, IS IT WRONG?

SHOULD I DO THIS,
SHOULD I DO THAT?

SOMETIMES YOU SHOULD
JUST JUMP IN, AND TAKE A SHOT.

WHAT'S THE WORST THAT CAN
HAPPEN? SHE LEFT BEFORE. I LIVED.

MAYBE THIS TIME...

I THINK THAT'S REALLY GREAT.

YOU DO? YEAH.

THANKS.

YOU'RE WELCOME.

WELL, I GUESS I'M GONNA
GO CHECK UP ON RACHEL.

THAT'S NICE.

WHAT?

THAT YOU HAVE SOMEBODY YOU
CAN GO CHECK UP ON. THAT'S NICE.

YEAH, IT IS, UNLESS SHE'S
COMPLETELY DRUNK AND THROWING UP.

STILL NICE.

I'LL SEE YOU TOMORROW?

TOMORROW.

♪ AND I THOUGHT IF I TOED ♪

♪ THE RIGHT LINES ♪

♪ BUT THESE MOCKINGBIRDS ♪

♪ WON'T LET ME SHINE ♪

HI. YOU'VE REACHED MAX MEDINA.

I'M NOT HERE NOW. LEAVE
A MESSAGE AT THE BEEP

AND I'LL GET BACK
TO YOU. THANKS.

RORY?

WE JUST BROKE UP.