George Lopez (2002–2007): Season 3, Episode 19 - Angie Gets Tanked - full transcript

A revealing picture of Angie getting soaked in the dunk tank at the school carnival shows up online for all the kids at school to see, and George plots revenge on the kid who took the picture.

HEY, HONEY.
OH, HEY.

HEY, DADDY.

HEY, BABY.

DON´T SCHEDULE ANYTHING
FOR SATURDAY THE 29th.

WE´VE GOT A FUNDRAISER
AT CARMEN´S SCHOOL.

OH, I CAN´T. I´M BUSY SATURDAYS
FOR THE REST OF THE YEAR.

DOING WHAT?

I´M A VOLUNTEER FIREMAN.

NO, YOU´RE NOT.

YES, I AM.

I DIDN´T WANT
TO TELL YOU, ANGIE,



´CAUSE I DIDN´T WANT YOU
TO WORRY ABOUT ME.

YOU KNOW,
OUT THERE ON THE FRONT LINE.

[ TELEPHONE RINGS ]

THAT COULD BE
THE STATION.

LOPEZ, UNIT 41.

WHAT, CHIEF? THERE´S GOING
TO BE A BIG FIRE ON THE 29th?

WELL, DON´T WORRY.
YOU CAN COUNT ON ME, CHIEF.

CHIEF SAID THEY MOVED
YOUR HAIR APPOINTMENT TO 4:30.

DAD, COME ON. THIS FUNDRAISER´S
REALLY IMPORTANT.

LOOK, CARMEN,
WE CAN BARELY AFFORD

THE 14 GRAND IT TAKES
TO SEND YOU TO THAT SCHOOL.

BUT THIS IS TO INCREASE
HANDICAPPED ACCESS.

DON´T THEY HAVE ENOUGH?
CARMEN, THEY GOT RAMPS

AND PARKING AND A HEAD START
AT THE L.A. MARATHON.



THEY´RE HALFWAY DONE
BY THE TIME

EVERYONE ELSE STARTS.
WHAT ELSE DO THEY WANT?

TO WALK?

WELL, I WANT TO FLY.
WHERE´S MY FUNDRAISER?

YOU KNOW, THE HANDICAPPED
BATHROOMS ARE NICE.

SOMETIMES
WHEN YOU´VE HAD A FEW,

THAT LITTLE RAILING,
YOU KNOW, ON THE SIDE --

IT´S THE ONLY THING
THAT KEEPS YOU

FROM TAKING A HEADER
INTO THE CAN.

HEY, MR. LOPEZ,
MRS. LOPEZ.

HI, JASON.
HEY, CARMEN.

I SIGNED US UP
TO DO THE KISSING BOOTH.

ARE YOU SURE
YOU WANT US

TO BE KISSING
A BUNCH OF OTHER GUYS?

NO, YOU´RE TAKING THE TICKETS.
I´M DOING ALL THE KISSING.

WELL -- HA.

IF IT´S A BUCK A KISS,

WHAT DOES A $20 GET ME?

MOM, YOU´RE NOT TALL ENOUGH
TO RIDE THAT RIDE.

YOU GOING TO BE THERE
SATURDAY, MR. LOPEZ?

LOOK, JASON,

I KNOW YOUR BROTHER´S
IN A WHEELCHAIR,

AND I KNOW YOU THINK
THIS FUNDRAISER´S IMPORTANT --

CAN I USE
YOUR BATHROOM?

BUT I THINK
IT´S CRUCIAL.

YOU MUST BE ERIC.

JASON´S TOLD ME SO MUCH
ABOUT YOU AND YOUR BRAVE FIGHT.

WELL, I´M LOSING THE FIGHT.
WHERE´S THE BATHROOM?

JASON, WHY DON´T YOU SHOW
YOUR BROTHER WHERE IT IS, HUH?

RIGHT TO THE LEFT.

EASY WITH
THE TOWEL RACKS, ERIC,

´CAUSE THEY´RE
NOT REINFORCED.

ALL RIGHT,
I´LL GO ON SATURDAY,

BUT I´M NOT GIVING THEM
ANY MONEY.

THEY´RE NOT ASKING
FOR MONEY.

THEY JUST WANT US
TO WORK A BOOTH.

SO EVERYONE´S
WORKING A BOOTH?

NO, MOST FAMILIES
ARE DONATING MONEY,

BUT THEY UNDERSTAND

A FEW FAMILIES CAN´T BEAR
THE FINANCIAL BURDEN.

CAN´T BEAR THE BURDEN?
SCREW THAT.

I´M NOT GOING TO PLAY
THE POOR FAMILY FOR THEM.

I´LL WRITE
A CHECK RIGHT NOW,

BECAUSE YOU KNOW WHAT?
I´M NOT WORKING IN A BOOTH.

THEY´RE ASKING
FOR $5,000.

OUR BOOTH IS GOING
TO MAKE MORE MONEY

THAN ALL THOSE
RICH PEOPLE COMBINED,

AND I DON´T CARE
WHAT IT IS, ANGIE --

THE RING TOSS
OR THE SQUIRT-A-CLOWN.

I´LL MAKE COTTON CANDY.
I´LL DO IT.

I´LL BE RIGHT THERE
GUESSING YOUR WEIGHT,

TAMBIéN WITH
THE LITTLE THING -- PA-PING!

THERE´S ONLY
TWO BOOTHS LEFT.

FINE. WHAT ARE THEY?

THERE´S
THE FIESTA TACO STAND --

THAT´S NOT GOING TO HAPPEN.
WHAT´S THE OTHER BOOTH?

WELL...

COME ON, PEOPLE,
DUNK THE VERY PROUD MAN.

OKAY, GET THE BALL.
LET´S TRY.

THE MONEY´S
FOR A GOOD CAUSE.

LET´S GO. LET´S GO.

ANGIE.

WE´RE NEVER GOING
TO MAKE ENOUGH MONEY

TO SHOW UP
THESE RICH PEOPLE.

WELL, MAYBE IT´S BECAUSE
NOBODY KNOWS YOU.

USUALLY THEY GET TO DUNK
SOMEBODY THAT THEY DON´T LIKE,

LIKE THE PRINCIPAL

OR THE MATH TEACHER
OR SOMEBODY.

WELL, IT´S HARD FOR ME
TO BE UNLIKABLE,

BUT I´LL GIVE IT
A SHOT.

YO, "DAWSON´S CREEK"!

COME ON, SPEND SOME
OF THAT TRUST FUND MONEY

ON SOMETHING
OTHER THAN HAIR GEL.

BUY A BALL.

COME ON, JASON.
DUNK HIM.

YEAH, JASON,
TAKE A SHOT.

MAYBE IT´LL
GET THINGS STARTED, HUH?

NO, I DON´T THINK
THAT´D BE GOOD

FOR MY RELATIONSHIP
WITH MR. LOPEZ.

RELATIONSHIP? I DON´T
EVEN LIKE YOU, MAN.

COME ON, QUARTERBACK!

I SAW YOUR TEAM
GO 1-12.

PRETEND THAT TARGET´S
THE OTHER TEAM´S SAFETY.

I BET YOU HIT IT
EVERY TIME.

ALL RIGHT.

I´LL PLAY.

CAREFUL.
DON´T BREAK A NAIL.

YOU GO, GIRL!

HEY, THE BENCH CALLED.
IT MISSES YOUR ASS.

YOU WANT TO TRY AGAIN?

NO, THAT´S ALL RIGHT.

I BETTER GET BACK
TO THE KISSING BOOTH.

YEAH, GO BACK
TO THAT KISSING BOOTH.

I´D RATHER KISS STRANGERS
THAN CARMEN, TOO.

OKAY.

OH, NOW I´M SCARED.

AS LONG
AS YOU´RE THROWING,

I´LL BE AS DRY
AS YOUR MOM´S ELBOW SKIN.

HEY!

HA.

THAT´S RIGHT, ANGIE,
I´M RIGHT HERE. BUY A BALL.

♫ ALL MY FRIENDS ♫

♫ KNOW THE LOW RIDER ♫

♫ THE LOW RIDER ♫

♫ IS A LITTLE HIGHER ♫

OKAY IF I HANG OUT?

YEAH, HANG ON.

I´M GOING TO BUILD YOU
ANOTHER RAMP.

OH, HEY!

HERCULES, HERCULES,
HERCULES!

WHERE YOU GOING, MAN?

THEY´LL BE SELLING
CORN DOGS ALL DAY.

GEORGE.

YOU WANT TO GO AGAIN?

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,

THERE GOES THE HARDEST-WORKING
COLON IN HIGH SCHOOL.

COME ON, MAN.
TAKE ANOTHER SHOT.

OH, YEAH.

WELL, PERHAPS IF THE TARGET
WAS A LITTLE BIGGER --

LIKE YOUR HEAD.

MAN, WHY YOU GOT
TO GO THERE, MAN?

DON´T HATE, PLAYER.

HEY, MOM.

IF YOU´RE HERE, WHAT ARE
ALL THE KIDS PETTING?

YOU KNOW WHAT?
YOU JUST GET READY TO SWIM.

Angie: HERE YOU GO.

THESE AREN´T FOR ME.

THEY´RE FOR MY NEW FRIEND
KENNY LOFTON.

KENNY LOFTON?

YOU´RE THE YANKEE
CENTER FIELDER!

6-TIME ALL-STAR,
GOLD GLOVE,

BUT YOU KNOW
WHAT THEY SAY, KENNY --

THAT ARM -- HA HA --
IT AIN´T WHAT IT USED TO BE.

HANG ON. LET ME
GET YOUR CUTOFF MAN.

ALL RIGHT.

WELL, YOU DID IT ONCE,
BUT...

CONSISTENCY´S
NOT YOUR STRONG SUIT,

OR ELSE THEY WOULDN´T HAVE
TRADED YOU SIX TIMES. WHOOP.

I´D LIKE 100 BALLS,
PLEASE.

[ SPEAKS SPANISH ]

OH, THAT WAS CLOSE.

HERE, WHY DON´T YOU
GIVE IT ANOTHER TRY, HUH?

ANGIE.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING
IN THE TANK?
COVERING FOR YOU.

YOU SAID YOU WERE
JUST GOING TO THE BATHROOM.

THAT WAS
HALF AN HOUR AGO.

THERE WAS A LONG LINE.

CHURRO?

AAH!

YOU ARE SO LUCKY
I DIDN´T GET DUNKED.

SWEETIE, WHY DON´T YOU
SAVE THAT LAST BALL,

AND THEN WHEN
MR. LOPEZ COMES, THEN --

IT´S ALL RIGHT.
SHE´S CUBAN.

SHE´LL BE IN MIAMI
IN TWO DAYS.

HA HA HA.

MR. LOPEZ?

YEAH?

I´M DR. STOLLER.

I´M THE PRINCIPAL
HERE AT ALLENDALE.

MAY I HAVE
A WORD WITH YOU?

OF COURSE YOU MAY.

MR. LOPEZ, I BELIEVE
YOU KNOW LAWRENCE BAXTER.

DID YOU MAKE COMMENTS

CONCERNING
THIS YOUNG MAN´S WEIGHT?

THIS YOUNG MAN
RIGHT HERE? NO.

THERE WERE WITNESSES, MAN.

I WAS TRYING
TO GET PEOPLE IN THE BOOTH.

HE TOOK IT
THE WRONG WAY.

DID YOU SAY HE HAS

THE HARDEST-WORKING COLON
IN HIGH SCHOOL?

WELL, WHEN YOU SAY IT,
IT SOUNDS KIND OF MEAN.

DR. STOLLER. HI.
HOW´S THE FUNDRAISER GOING?

SHE WAS STANDING
RIGHT THERE. ASK HER.

LAWRENCE, CHILL.

MRS. LOPEZ, DID YOU HEAR
THE DISPARAGING REMARKS

YOUR HUSBAND MADE
ABOUT LAWRENCE?

NO, I-I ONLY HEARD HIM
SAY "GOOD JOB, SON.

THAT´LL HELP RAISE MONEY
FOR OUR HANDICAPPED FRIENDS."

YOU KNOW,
DID YOU KNOW

MY HUSBAND WAS
A VOLUNTEER FIREFIGHTER?

IT´S TOO LATE, ANGIE.
[ Speaks Spanish ]

WHAT?

HE SAID
THE BIG CRYBABY SCREWED HIM.

I USED TO TEACH SPANISH.

I´LL JUST APOLOGIZE TO HIM.
HE´S RIGHT THERE.

I´M AFRAID
IT´S TOO LATE FOR THAT.

YOU SEE, WE HAVE
A ZERO-TOLERANCE POLICY HERE

FOR VERBAL ABUSE,

AND THAT APPLIES
TO THE PARENTS AS WELL.

YOU NEED TO WRITE
A LETTER OF APOLOGY.

WE WILL PUBLISH IT
IN THE SCHOOL PAPER.

BUT UNTIL THAT TIME,

I´M AFRAID YOU´RE GOING
TO HAVE TO LEAVE THE CAMPUS.

SO YOU´RE
THROWING ME OUT?

HONEY, DON´T MAKE A SCENE.

DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH MONEY
I MADE FOR THIS FUNDRAISER?

I BET IF I WAS
ONE OF THESE RICH PARENTS,

I BET IF I HAD DONATED
A LIBRARY OR A SCIENCE LAB,

I COULD DO WHATEVER I WANT,
I COULD SAY WHATEVER I WANT.

HEY, THURSTON,
DIDN´T YOU GET THE E-MAIL?

STUPID HAT DAY
IS TOMORROW.

COME ON, ANGIE.

STOP MAKING A SCENE.
WRAP YOURSELF.

STOP IT.

HEY, HONEY.

HEY.

ARE YOU WRITING
YOUR APOLOGY LETTER?

YES.

HOW´S THIS?

DEAR LAWRENCE,
THIS IS AN APOLOGY.

DO NOT EAT THIS LETTER.

JUST WRITE
A REAL APOLOGY.

I DON´T WANT PRINCIPAL STOLLER
TO BE MAD AT ME.

I HAVE TO FACE HER

EVERY TIME I VOLUNTEER
AT THE SCHOOL LIBRARY.

YOU KNOW, ANGIE,
WHEN I WAS A KID,

I GOT MADE FUN OF
ALL THE TIME,

AND NOBODY EVER TOLD ME
THEY WERE SORRY.

MY SCIENCE TEACHER
NEVER APOLOGIZED FOR SAYING,

"KIDS, TODAY I´M GOING
TO TEACH YOU ABOUT AN ECLIPSE.

LOPEZ, PUT YOUR HEAD
IN FRONT OF THE SUN."

AND THEN IT GOT DARK,

AND NOBODY COULD SEE
MY TEARS WELLING UP.

HONEY.

I LOVE YOUR BIG HEAD.

LOOK, IT HAS
ITS OWN GRAVITATIONAL PULL.

TODAY WAS THE WORST DAY
OF MY LIFE.

LET ME GUESS --

I MADE FUN OF SOME KIDS,
SO TODAY THEY MADE FUN OF YOU.

BUT, HONEY,
ISN´T IT POSSIBLE

THAT THEY WERE JUST GOING
TO MAKE FUN OF YOU ANYWAY?

NO.

LOOK WHAT´S POSTED
ON THE SCHOOL´S WEB SITE.

ALL RIGHT, SOME KID
PUT A PICTURE OF A HOT CHICK

IN A WET T-SHIRT
THAT LOOKS JUST LIKE -- ANGIE!

THAT´S ME
GETTING OUT OF THE DUNK TANK.

YOU COULD SEE
RIGHT THROUGH MY SHIRT.

WHO DID THIS?

I DON´T KNOW,

BUT EVERY KID IN SCHOOL
HAS SEEN IT.

WELL, NOBODY DOES THIS
TO MY WIFE.

SOMEBODY´S GOING
TO PAY FOR THIS.

HA HA HA.

OOH, YEAH.

I KNOW A LOT OF GUYS
WHO´LL PAY FOR THAT.

IF I WANTED PEOPLE TO SEE
PICTURES OF MY WIFE LIKE THAT,

I WOULD HAVE
MARRIED A PLAYMATE.

YEAH.

THAT´S WHAT STOPPED YOU.

[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]

HEY, JASON.

HEY, CARMEN.
HEY, MR. LOPEZ.

HEY.

MRS. LOPEZ.

JASON, IT´S OKAY.
YOU CAN LOOK AT ME.

I DIDN´T SEE
THE PICTURE.

THEN WHY CAN´T YOU
LOOK AT ME?

OKAY, I SAW IT.

BUT ONLY BECAUSE
ONE OF THE GUYS

ON THE FOOTBALL TEAM
MADE IT INTO A LIFE-SIZE POSTER

AND PUT IT UP
IN THE SHOWER.

THAT´S IT.
I´M GOING DOWN TO THAT SCHOOL,

AND I´M GOING
TO BUST SOME HEADS.

WHOSE HEADS?

WE DON´T EVEN KNOW
WHO´S RESPONSIBLE.

ACTUALLY, THAT´S WHY
I CAME OVER.

YOU KNOW THAT BIG KID
MR. LOPEZ WAS MAKING FUN OF?

MY BROTHER SAW HIM
AT THE DUNK TANK

WITH A CAMERA PHONE.

LAWRENCE.

ANGIE, I´M GOING
TO GET THAT DIRECTORY,

AND I´M GOING
TO TAKE CARE OF LAWRENCE.

YOU´RE NOT GOING
TO DO ANYTHING.

YOU´VE DONE ENOUGH.
I WILL HANDLE THIS.

BUT, BABY,

I GOT THIS.

YOU ALWAYS SAY THAT,

BUT YOU NEVER HAVE IT.

EVER.

SOMETIMES I HAVE IT.

I JUST DON´T ALWAYS
BRAG ABOUT IT.

AND SOMETIMES
I JUST HAVE IT.

YOU JUST CLICK ONCE

AND DRAG IT
WHEREVER YOU WANT.

IT´S REALLY EASY TO PUT A HEAD
ON SOMEONE ELSE´S BODY. MM-HMM.

OH, SEE HERE?

MICHAEL JACKSON
DANGLING CARMEN FROM A BALCONY.

ALL RIGHT, THAT´S GREAT, MAN.
SCOOT OVER.

HEY, ERNIE, YOU GOT
LAWRENCE´S PICTURE

FROM CARMEN´S YEARBOOK?

WHAT ARE YOU GOING
TO DO, DAD?

OKAY, WATCH THIS.

ALL RIGHT,
SEE THE MAMA PIG

SUCKLING HER
10 LITTLE PIGLETS?

THERE´S LAWRENCE
SUCKLING 10 LITTLE PIGLETS.

HA HA HA HA HA!

OH, HEY, PUT HIS HEAD
ON THE PICTURE

OF THOSE TWO PIGS
PLAYING LEAPFROG --

THE ONE WHERE IT SAYS
"MAKIN´ BACON."

THEY´RE NOT PLAYING
LEAPFROG, MAX.

THOSE PIGS ARE -- AY!

OKAY.

HERE´S 5 BUCKS, OKAY?
YOU WERE NEVER HERE.

LET´S GO
TO THE ALLENDALE WEB SITE

AND POST THIS,

´CAUSE YOU DON´T MESS
WITH GEORGE LOPEZ´S LADY,

BECAUSE I´M HARD
LIKE THAT.

THAT´S RIGHT.
THAT´S WHAT I´M TALKING ABOUT.

NOBODY MESSES WITH US.
WE´RE LIKE --

Angie: ANYBODY HOME?

SEND IT! SEND IT QUICK!
HIT RETURN -- RIGHT THERE!

SO HOW DID IT GO
AT SCHOOL?

I MET WITH THE PRINCIPAL,

AND SHE´S GOING
TO TALK TO LAWRENCE.

AND TOMORROW, I´M GOING
TO WORK AT THE LIBRARY

LIKE NOTHING EVER HAPPENED.

I´M NOT GOING TO LET
SOME STUPID TEENAGE PRANK

CHANGE MY LIFE.

GOOD FOR YOU.

THANK YOU
FOR NOT INTERFERING.

I HAD TO DO THIS
MY WAY.

YOU´RE RIGHT, BABY.

LOOK, YOU HAVE YOUR WAY,
AND I HAVE MINE, OKAY?

IF WE BOTH RESPECT THAT,
I´LL NEVER HAVE TO SLEEP

ON THE WEIGHT BENCH
IN THE GARAGE.

HEY, MRS. LOPEZ.

ANY BETTER TODAY, HONEY?

WELL, UM...

DURING
THE MORNING ASSEMBLY,

THE PRINCIPAL
POINTED AT ME

AND TOLD EVERYONE TO STOP
MAKING FUN OF CARMEN LOPEZ.

THAT HELPED.

I´LL GO UPSTAIRS
AND TALK TO HER.

OH, THANK GOD.
I THOUGHT IT WAS MY TURN.

IT IS YOUR TURN.

YEAH, BUT YOU´RE ALREADY
RIGHT THERE BY THE STAIRS,

SO JUST GO.

MAYBE WE SHOULD GO.

YEAH, I DON´T THINK CARMEN´S
IN THE MOOD TO HANG OUT.

PEOPLE WERE GIVING HER CRAP
ABOUT THAT PICTURE ALL DAY.

YEAH, WELL,
DON´T WORRY.

THEY´LL BE TALKING ABOUT
ANOTHER PICTURE TOMORROW.

CHECK THIS OUT.

I JUST POSTED THIS
ON THE SCHOOL´S WEB SITE.

OOH.

HEY, THAT´S LAWRENCE.

HE´S NURSING PIGLETS.

WHO KNEW HE WAS
SUCH A NURTURING MOTHER?

MR. LOPEZ,
THAT´S KIND OF HARSH.

THE GUY JUST MADE
ONE MISTAKE.

ONE MISTAKE? DID YOU SEE
WHAT HE DID TO MRS. LOPEZ?

LET HIM SUFFER.

I MEAN HE ALREADY GETS TEASED
A LOT BECAUSE OF HIS WEIGHT.

WELL, HE SHOULD HAVE
THOUGHT ABOUT THAT

BEFORE HE TOOK
THAT PICTURE.

BUT WE´RE NOT REALLY SURE
HE DID IT.

I THOUGHT YOU SAID YOU SAW HIM
WITH A CAMERA PHONE.

WELL, I DID,
BUT THAT DOESN´T MEAN ANYTHING.

A LOT OF PEOPLE
HAVE CAMERA PHONES.

LOOK, I JUST SENT OUT PICTURES
OF THIS KID AS A PIG

BECAUSE OF WHAT YOU SAID.

I DIDN´T KNOW
YOU WERE GOING TO DO THAT.

I WOULDN´T HAVE
SAID ANYTHING.

DO YOU HAVE
A CAMERA PHONE, ERIC?

I THINK
I LEFT THE VAN RAMP DOWN.

NOT SO FAST, IRONSIDE!

WHAT´S GOING ON, ERIC?

I TOOK THE PICTURE.

I´M REALLY, REALLY SORRY.

YOU LITTLE --

OKAY, FAIR FIGHT.

ROLL INTO THIS!

WHAT IS GOING ON?

IT WAS HIM, ANGIE.
ERIC TOOK THAT PICTURE OF YOU.

WHAT?

WHY WOULD YOU
DO THAT?

I DON´T KNOW.
I THOUGHT IT´D BE FUNNY.

I´M REALLY SORRY,
MRS. LOPEZ.

I FEEL TERRIBLE.

WELL...

AS LONG AS YOU UNDERSTAND
WHAT YOU´VE DONE IS WRONG,

I GUESS...

WE CAN LET THIS GO.

MRS. LOPEZ,

IF YOU DON´T TREAT HIM
LIKE EVERYBODY ELSE,

YOU´RE NOT DOING HIM
ANY FAVORS.

YOU DROOLING
LITTLE WEASEL!

I WORKED THAT STUPID BOOTH
ALL DAY

TO HELP RAISE MONEY
TO MAKE YOUR LIFE EASIER,

AND THIS IS
HOW YOU PAY ME BACK?

I HAVE HALF A MIND

TO TIE YOUR HANDS
BEHIND YOUR BACK

AND PUSH YOU
INTO A POOL.

THAT WOULD KILL HIM.

WELL, TOMORROW MORNING,

I AM TAKING YOU
TO THE PRINCIPAL.

I WOULDN´T BE SURPRISED
IF YOU GOT SUSPENDED.

CAN WE GO
IN THE AFTERNOON?

I HAVE NEUROMUSCULAR THERAPY
IN THE MORNING.

WELL...

LET´S JUST FORGET
THIS EVER HAPPENED, HUH?

THANK YOU.
IT WAS JUST A DUMB PRANK.

I NEVER EXPECTED
ALL THOSE KIDS TO TEASE CARMEN.

OH, AND THAT PICTURE OF LAWRENCE
MR. LOPEZ PUT ON THE INTERNET --

AHEM.

WHAT PICTURE?

LET´S REMEMBER WHO
THE REAL VILLAIN IS HERE --

THE KID IN THE WHEELCHAIR.

WHAT PICTURE?

ANGIE...

THERE IS
NO MORE NOBLE ACTION

THAN TO DEFEND
THE HONOR AND VIRTUE

OF THE WOMAN
THAT YOU LOVE.

I PUT THE BOY´S HEAD
ON A PICTURE OF A...

MOTHER PIG OFFERING
ONE OF HER MANY MILK NOZZLES

TO HER YOUNG.

I DARE YOU
TO FIND FAULT WITH THAT.

TO THE WEIGHT BENCH.

GEORGE,
LAWRENCE IS HERE.

OH, ANGIE,
DO I HAVE TO?

YES, YOU DO.

ALL RIGHT,
BUT IF YOU GO OUT THERE

AND YOU DON´T SEE ME,
AND THERE´S A BIG LUMP

IN LAWRENCE´S THROAT,
CALL THE COPS.

YOU WANTED TO SEE ME?

YES, I DID.

LISTEN, LAWRENCE,

I WAS WAY OUT OF LINE,
OKAY?

AND WHAT I DID
WAS INSENSITIVE,

AND I WANTED
TO CALL YOU OVER HERE

TO TELL YOU I´M SORRY,

AND TO GIVE YOU A...

AUTOGRAPHED PICTURE
OF KENNY LOFTON.

AND...

AND...

A PICTURE OF -- HEY --

MICHAEL JACKSON
DANGLING ME OVER THE BALCONY.

HA HA.

I LOOK SCARED,
BUT I´M NOT.

WHAT ELSE YOU GOT?

A VERY HEARTFELT
"I´M SORRY," AND GOODBYE.

YOUR WIFE SAYS
YOU HAVE SOMETHING SPECIAL

TO GIVE ME
FOR WHAT YOU DID.

WHAT ARE YOU,
HOLDING BACK?

MY WIFE SAID THAT?

YEAH.

ALL RIGHT.

HERE ARE TWO...

COURTSIDE LAKER TICKETS

I GOT FOR MY BIRTHDAY.
ARE WE COOL?

WOW, MR. LOPEZ.
THANKS, MAN.

HEY, MAN, IF YOU CAN´T FIND
ANYBODY TO GO WITH YOU --

YEAH, YEAH, MAN.
WE CAN HAVE HOT DOGS,

POPCORN, COTTON CANDY,
EVERYTHING, RIGHT?

WELL, TOO BAD, ´CAUSE BIG "L"
DON´T ROLL LIKE THAT.

PEACE OUT, BROTHER.