Full House (1987–1995): Season 5, Episode 8 - Gotta Dance - full transcript

[♪♪♪]

What are you doing?

Waiting for Jeremy to call.

That's it. I don't care
how cute his dimples are

or how bad I need
a date for Friday.

I wait for no man.

For more than
an hour and a half.

I'm pathetic.

[PHONE RINGS]

Hello.

Hi, Jeremy. You're late.



Is that Jeremy?

Hey, Mr. Dimples,
D.J. waits for no man.

Michelle.

He sounded cute.

Next time, give the guy a break.

[JESSE FREDERICK'S
"EVERYWHERE YOU LOOK" PLAYING]

♪ Ahh-ahh-ahh-ahhh ♪

♪ Ahhh ♪

♪ Whatever happened
To predictability ♪

♪ The milkman The paperboy ♪

♪ Evenin' TV? ♪

♪ How did I get
Delivered here? ♪

♪ Somebody tell me, please ♪

♪ This whole world's
Confusin' me ♪



♪ Flowers as mean ♪

♪ As you've ever seen ♪

♪ Ain't a bird Who
knows your tune ♪

♪ Then a little voice
Inside you whispers: ♪

♪ "Kid, don't sell your
dreams So soon" ♪

♪ Everywhere you look ♪
♪ Everywhere you look ♪

♪ There's a heart ♪
♪ There's a heart ♪

♪ A hand to hold on to ♪

♪ Everywhere you look ♪
♪ Everywhere you look ♪

♪ There's a face ♪

♪ Of somebody who needs you ♪

♪ Everywhere you look ♪

♪ When you're lost out
there And you're all alone ♪

♪ A light is waitin'
To carry you home ♪

♪ Everywhere you look ♪

♪ Everywhere you look ♪
♪ Ahh-ahh-ahh-ahhh ♪

♪ Dooby-doo-baa-ba-daa ♪

[MUMBLING INDISTINCTLY]

Howdy ho, Jess.

Oh, howdy ho, Ranger Joe.

Hey, don't I get a "Howdy
ho, Mr. Woodchuck?"

Oh, the joys of living
with a kiddie show host.

Have a good show today, Joe.

Say, something looks delicious.

I'm making beef stew.

I was talking about the spoon.

Is it made of... wood?

Get out of my face or it's
gonna be woodchuck stew, okay?

Well, aren't we Mr. Grumpy-Rump?

Back off, Bucky.

Make me, mousse-hair.

You wanna take this outside?

I'm arguing with a puppet here.

And you're losing.

[CACKLING]

Okay, Dad, you thought it over.

Can I do it? Please,
please, please?

Guys, tell him to let me do it.

Oh, come on, Danny,
what's the big deal?

Let her do it. Do what?

Steph's teacher thinks
she might have a career

as a professional dancer.

There's only one
thing stopping me

from being the happiest
I've been in my whole life.

Of all people.

Steph, this is a big
commitment you're talking about.

It means taking special
classes before and after school

and on weekends,

earlier bedtimes and less T.V.

I don't care what it
takes. I'll do anything.

Oh, come on, Danny,
the kid's got a dream.

If I'd been that focused
on my music in the '70s,

who knows what
would've happened.

Yeah, it might've been you

singing "Macho Man"
in that headdress.

I would not have been
in the Village People.

If I were, I'd have been
the construction guy.

You know, come to think of it,

when I was Steph's age,
all I ever dreamed about

was winning an Olympic
gold medal in the high jump.

To this day I sometimes
wonder, if I'd given it my all,

would I have made it?

BOTH: No.

Dad, do you want me to
go through my whole life

wondering if I would've made it?

Whoa, good guilt.

Dad, I promise I
won't let you down.

Please let me do it?
Please, please, please?

Okay, honey, if this is
what you really want,

I won't be like my dad
was when he refused

to let me put a high
jump pit in the living room.

If this is your dream,
sweetie, you go for it.

Thanks, Dad. Thanks, guys.

Okay, now, you go
out there and you be

the best darn high
jumper you can be.

Dad, I'm a dancer.

That's even better.

Okay, Michelle,

I'll stuff the envelope,
and you put the stamp on it.

Ew, gross.

Don't you have some
chocolate stamps?

Becky, there's no way
you're gonna get Jesse

to go to your baby shower.

You'd have to club
him over the head,

tie him in a sack
and drag him there.

Joey, this is the '90s.

Men are much more
open-minded about these things.

Now D.J., don't you
think your Uncle Jesse

would like to go to
his own baby shower?

Sure, if you club him,
sack him and drag him.

Nah, I can't club him.

But I can trick him.
That's what I'll do.

I'll make it a
co-ed baby shower,

and I'll invite all
of his buddies.

But I'll tell him that
it's a regular party.

And then when he shows up,

he'll just have to go
along with the whole thing.

Now, we're all gonna
keep this secret, right?

Right.

Right. Right.

Oh, no. She's never
kept a secret in her life.

Uh-huh. You don't know
when I put on your makeup.

Oops.

Hey, what's goin' on?

Nothing, Uncle Jesse.

Like I said, what's goin' on?

We don't have a secret.
Right, Aunt Becky?

[LAUGHING] Well...

Okay, sweetheart, you caught me.

I wanted to have a party.

You know, one big,
final, monster blowout

before we become parents.

Really? that's a good idea.

What can I do?

Uh, nothing. Nothing at all.

I'll take care of everything

and all you have
to do is show up.

How does that sound?

Sounds good to me.

What sounds good to you?

Nothing.

I don't wanna miss this party.

Now, that's how
you keep a secret.

Oh, yeah.

[CACKLING]

Oh, Michelle, my darling.

I have a surprise for you.

Whoa, baby.

Not so fast.

You little sugar freak.

All right, now, Michelle,

While I make this triple dip...

double fudge...

whipped cream sundae
with a cherry on top...

just out of curiosity, is
there some kind of a...?

I don't know, secret

about this, uh, party
Becky's throwin'?

I can't tell you.

You missed a spot.

Thank you.

Well, Michelle, you know, I...

I sure would love to

share this ice cream
sundae with you.

I'd sure love that too.

Hm, well, then, let's talk
about that secret, shall we?

What do I do? What do I do?

Well, you can start
by holding this spoon,

while I put on these
chocolate sprinkles.

Chocolate sprinkles?

Mm-hm.

And your favorite and mine...

The cherry.

The party is a baby shower.

Now, drop that cherry!

Aha. A baby shower.

It's worse than I thought.

Thanks, Michelle.

[MUFFLED] You're welcome.

Is there anything
else you wanna know?

Nah, there's nothing
else I wanna know.

I hate to spoil your dinner.

Let me have a bite.

Hey, Steph, do you wanna
help put up decorations

for Aunt Becky's baby shower?

I wish I could,

but I've gotta get to
my dress rehearsal.

You know, I have
to give you credit.

Ever since you started
taking these dance classes,

all I've seen you do is
eat, sleep and dance.

If I had your discipline
and dedication,

I'd have no life.

Comet, I have a life.

I have friends.

Who I never see anymore.

And I have my family.

Who I never see anymore.

But I have eight
hours free every night.

Of course, that's
when I'm sleeping.

Who am I kidding?
I have no life.

[BARKS]

You're right, Comet.

I'm gonna tell Dad I quit.

You guys are gonna
love these shower games.

We have:

Guess the Number of Diaper Pins.

BOTH: Ooh.

Name that Baby Food.

BOTH: Aah.

And the always popular,

Draw the Baby
on a Paper Plate...

on Your Head.

I feel so much better

about giving away
those 49ers tickets.

JESSE: Hey, Beck, where are you?

Um, I'm up here, sweetheart.

Oh, there you are. Hey, Beck,

are you sure there's
nothing I can do

for this big blowout
party you're throwing?

Nope. Everything's
taken care of.

Everything's taken care of.

Isn't she a jewel?

The way she babies me

and showers me with love?

[JESSE CHUCKLING]

[BECKY LAUGHING NERVOUSLY]

Well, sweetheart,

uh, why don't you
go to the movies?

And by the time you get back,

we'll be ready to rock.

Here's 10 bucks.

And she even gives me the money.

Can you believe this?
All right, I can't wait.

This is gonna be the
biggest, baddest blowout

this block has ever seen.

Shake, rattle and roll.

Well, he got the
rattle part right.

Boy, Deej,

I'm starting to feel a
little guilty about this.

JESSE: Love you, sweetheart.

You should have
just clubbed him.

Uh, Dad,

can I talk to you about
this whole dance thing?

Yeah, I wanna talk to you too.

Wait until you see your
costume for the recital.

Right here.

Okay.

What do you think?

It looks great.

Yeah, I stayed up all night
sewing on the extra sequins.

I felt like Liberace's dad.

Steph, do you know
your teacher thinks

you're the most promising
student in her class?

I might not have made
it as a high jumper,

but you, you could wind up as...

As a star on Broadway.

BOTH: ♪ She's dancing ♪

♪ She's dancing ♪

♪ She's dancing ♪

♪ She's dancing ♪

ALL: ♪ Just looking at her
You can tell she's a winner ♪

♪ She's Stephanie Tanner
She's one ball of glamour ♪

That's me!

[♪♪♪]

♪ I'm your Broadway
baby I'm the one ♪

♪ I can dance any dance
And make it second to none ♪

ALL: ♪ She taps and spins ♪

♪ And does high kicks
All over the place ♪

STEPH: ♪ But through
it all I still keep up ♪

♪ The smile on my face ♪

ALL: ♪ Stephanie Tanner
You're a dream come true ♪

♪ I'm living out My
childhood ambitions ♪

♪ Through you ♪

[DRUM ROLL]

[CYMBAL CRASHES]

[♪♪♪]

♪ She's the best darn
dancer On Broadway ♪

♪ She's Stephanie Tanner ♪

That's me!

♪ Stephanie Tanner ♪

♪ And she's here to stay ♪

♪ Da-da da da da
da Da-da da da ♪

Dad, Dad, Dad, snap out of it.

Dad.

Oh, right. Sorry.

Oh, Steph, I am so glad

you talked me into letting
you do this dance program.

Honey, when you put
your mind to something,

you go all the way with it.

Now, what is it you
wanted to tell me?

Uh, just that I'm ready to go.

Great, let me get my car
keys and we are out of here.

♪ She's Stephanie Tanner
and she's here... Ho! ♪

♪ ... to... Hey! stay ♪

You guys are gonna
love this baby shower.

Deej, tell them how
to play our first game.

Well, Becky,

whoever has the bunny
stamp on their rattle

wins this lovely set
of blue potholders.

I won.

Those are gonna go great
with my checkered dish towels.

As if I care.

JESSE: Beck, I'm back.

Oh, okay, everybody, get ready.

ALL: Surprise!

What the heck?

Boy, if I didn't know better,
I'd say this was a baby shower.

It is a baby shower.
Isn't this a fun surprise?

Oh, oh, yeah,

this is one of my new
favorite fun surprises.

I wish I... I would've known,

because I invited some friends

to what I innocently
thought was, like,

a big major blowout though.

Oh, well, that's okay.
The more, the merrier.

Oh, really? Oh, good.
Okay. Guys, come on in.

ALL: Yeah, hey.

Thank you, boys.

[GRUNTING]

Hold it.

Tiny, Brain Dead,

if you guys are gonna fight,
please, no blood on the carpet.

Oh, man.

Well... Oh, Jess,
this is all my fault.

I deserve to have my
baby shower ruined.

Beck, these guys are my friends.

I put 'em up to it.

I've known about your
little scam for a week now.

You have?

I wonder who told you.

I have no idea.

Boy, am I getting
sleepy. Time for my nap.

Excuse me, boys.

Freeze, munchkin.

Did you tell Uncle
Jesse our little secret?

I'm sorry, but the
man had ice cream.

You bribed her with ice cream?

And chocolate fudge and
whipped cream and a cherry.

Oh, that is low.

Oh, and... And not telling me

about our baby
shower, that's not low?

If I'm not in trouble, may
I go back to the party?

Sure. Go ahead.

Oh, yeah. He had sprinkles too.

I'm sorry, Jess.
This is all my fault.

I should have never
tried to trick you.

Well, I was a little sneaky
with that ice cream motif.

I got an idea. Let's just always
be honest with each other, huh?

Okay.

So be honest. Mm-hm.

If I would've just
come right out

and asked you to go
to the baby shower,

you would have come, right?

No.

It's a good thing
you tricked me.

Okay, everybody, say hi, family.

ALL: Hi, family.

I'm going backstage
before the big recital

to meet the star herself.

And there she is.

Oh, look at that.
A dancer prepares.

Let's see if we can
get a word with her.

Oh, Miss Tanner.

Dad, what are you
doing back here?

As focused as she is, she
still knows I'm her father.

Steph, listen to me.
I've got some great news.

I am sitting next
to the director

of the Bayview Dance Academy.

If he likes your
performance tonight,

we can get you into
their summer dance camp.

So I'd be dancing my
whole summer vacation?

Every day? Nothing but dancing?

Yeah, isn't that wonderful?

They're gonna start,
okay, so don't be nervous.

Just break a leg
and don't be nervous.

'Cause I'm nervous
enough for the both of us.

Welcome to our recital.

I'd like to remind everyone
that bright flashes and lights

are distracting to our dancers.

Tanner, you're blinding me.

Thank you.

Our first performance is our
advanced modern dance group,

doing some street
dancing to "Motown Philly."

That's my Stephanie
in the middle.

She dances as well
as that McHammer guy.

It's M.C. Hammer.

[BOYZ II MEN'S "MOTOWN
PHILLY" PLAYING]

♪ Motown Philly back again ♪

♪ Doin' a little
East Coast swing ♪

♪ Boyz II Men Goin' on... ♪

[MUSIC FADES OUT]

I'm sorry. I'm really sorry.

Let's take a short intermission.

Stephanie.

What happened?

I got all messed up, and
I didn't know what to do,

so I started doing anything.

I guess I just don't
have what it takes.

Honey, sit down.

Steph, you had that
routine down cold.

I think you blew it on purpose.

Why would I do that?

I was wondering the same thing.

Okay. I blew it on purpose.

But I thought this was
something you really wanted.

It was. At first.

But then, I never
got to see my friends,

I missed the baby shower,

and I never got
to do anything fun.

I don't wanna go to
dance camp all summer.

Steph, if you wanted to quit,

why didn't you just tell me?

How could I?

I begged you to let me do this.

I didn't want to let you down.

I would have understood.

Dad, you had me
starring on Broadway.

And you were doing high
jumps in the chorus line.

Maybe I did get a
little carried away, huh?

So you're not
disappointed in me?

No.

It's great to have a dream,

but it's okay to
change your dream too.

You don't have to
dance if you don't want to.

I still wanna dance,
just not all the time.

Okay, then, why don't we go back

to the way things were before?

When dancing was
just part of your life,

instead of your whole life.

Thanks, Dad. I love you.

Oh, I love you too.

I'll be right back.

Okay.

Uh, guys, I'm really
sorry I messed you up.

ALL: That's okay.

That's fine.

Uh, can we have another chance?

Absolutely. Are you ready girls?

ALL: Yeah.

Come on, let's go for it!

ALL: Whoo!

Ladies and gentlemen,
we'd like to try that number

for you one more time.

[BOYZ II MEN'S "MOTOWN
PHILLY" PLAYING]

♪ Motown Philly back again ♪

♪ Doin' a little
East coast swing ♪

♪ Boyz II Men Goin' on ♪

♪ Not too hard Not too soft ♪

♪ It's long overdue But now ♪

♪ Philly's slammin' ♪

♪ It's Boyz II Men ABC, BBD ♪

♪ The East Coast family ♪

♪ Never skipped a beat ♪

♪ While coolin'
On South Street ♪

♪ Jet-black Benz
Plenty of friends ♪

♪ And all the Philly
steaks You can eat ♪

♪ Back in school ♪

♪ We used to dream
about this Every day ♪

♪ Could it really happen ♪

♪ Or do dreams just
fade away? Yeah ♪

♪ Then we started singin' ♪

♪ And they said It
sounded smooth ♪

♪ Then we started a
group And here we are ♪

♪ Kickin' it just
for you Oh-oh ♪

♪ Motown Philly back again ♪

♪ Doin' a little
East Coast swing ♪

[MUSIC STOPS]

[ALL CHEERING]

[♪♪♪]

♪ Ahh-ahh-ahh-ahhh ♪

[♪♪♪]

♪ Ahh-ahh-ahh-ahhh ♪

♪ Dooby-doo-baa-ba-daa ♪