Full House (1987–1995): Season 4, Episode 19 - The Wedding: Part 2 - full transcript
Jesse's attempt at skydiving makes him late for his own wedding.
LAST WEEK, EVERYTHING
WENT BANANAS.
"DEAR FAMILY, YOU MUST BE
WONDERING WHERE I WENT.
"I KIDNAPPED JOEY, BUT WE'LL
BE BACK FOR THE WEDDING.
"THERE WAS ONE
LAST THING I HAD TO DO
BEFORE I GOT MARRIED."
HAVE MERCY!
YOU TOOK HIM SKYDIVING?
WELL, THEN, WHERE IS HE?
WHAT IF SOMETHING
HAPPENED TO HIM?
HELP!
WHAT WILL HAPPEN NEXT?
EVEN I DON'T KNOW.
♪ AHH ♪
♪ AHH ♪
♪ WHATEVER HAPPENED
TO PREDICTABILITY ♪
♪ THE MILKMAN, THE PAPER BOY ♪
♪ EVENIN' TV ♪
♪ HOW DID I GET DELIVERED HERE ♪
♪ SOMEBODY TELL ME, PLEASE ♪
♪ THIS OLD WORLD'S ♪
♪ CONFUSIN' ME ♪
♪ CLOUDS AS MEAN
AS YOU'VE EVER SEEN ♪
♪ AIN'T A BIRD WHO
KNOWS YOUR TUNE ♪
♪ THEN A LITTLE VOICE
INSIDE YOU WHISPERS ♪
♪ KID, DON'T SELL YOUR
DREAMS SO SOON ♪
♪ EVERYWHERE YOU LOOK ♪
♪ EVERYWHERE YOU LOOK ♪
♪ THERE'S A HEART ♪
♪ A HAND TO HOLD ON TO ♪
♪ EVERYWHERE YOU LOOK ♪
♪ EVERYWHERE YOU LOOK ♪
♪ THERE'S A FACE ♪
♪ OF SOMEBODY WHO NEEDS YOU ♪
♪ EVERYWHERE YOU LOOK ♪
♪ WHEN YOU'RE LOST OUT THERE ♪
♪ AND YOU'RE ALL ALONE ♪
♪ A LIGHT IS WAITIN' ♪
♪ TO CARRY YOU HOME ♪
♪ EVERYWHERE YOU LOOK ♪
♪ EVERYWHERE YOU LOOK ♪
♪ DO BE DO BA BA DA ♪♪
CAPTIONING MADE
POSSIBLE BY WARNER BROS.
HEY! HELP!
HELP ME!
HEY, YOU! WITH THE TOMATO TRUCK!
STOP!
I'M UP IN THE TREE! UP HERE!
HEY, WHAT YOU DOING
UP THERE, FELLA?
OH, JUST ENJOYING THE VIEW!
WHAT DO YOU THINK I'M DOING?
COULD YOU HELP ME DOWN, PLEASE!
WELL, YEAH. SURE.
I'LL TELL YOU WHAT.
I'LL GO GET OLD MAN
HUDSON'S CHERRY PICKER.
ALL RIGHT, WELL, HURRY UP.
I WAS SUPPOSED TO BE AT
MY WEDDING 10 MINUTES AGO.
THANKS.
WELL, I IMAGINE
WE'LL HAVE YOU DOWN
IN 2, 3 HOURS, TOPS.
NOW, DON'T YOU GO ANYWHERE.
WHAT?
I CAN'T WAIT THAT LONG.
MERCY!
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
THOSE ARE MY PRIZE TOMATOES
YOU JUST SQUASHED.
WELL, THEY'RE NOT
TOMATOES ANYMORE.
THEY'RE KETCHUP.
I JUST CUT OUT THE MIDDLEMAN.
ALL RIGHT, IS THAT...
IS THAT SOME SORT
OF TOMATO JOKE?
YOU BETTER WATCH
YOUR MOUTH, BOY.
THIS HERE'S TOMATO COUNTRY.
LOOK. LOOK. LOOK.
I HAVE NOTHING BUT
THE HIGHEST REGARD
FOR TOMATOES, AND THE MEN
AND WOMEN THAT DO GROW THEM,
BUT I NEED A RIDE TO SAN
FRANCISCO RIGHT NOW.
I DON'T GIVE RIDES TO
TOMATO SQUASHERS.
THIS IS MY LIFE WE'RE
TALKING ABOUT, OK?
NOT SOME DUMB VEGETABLE.
IT'S A FRUIT.
FRUIT, VEGETABLE.
LOOK, THE POINT
IS... I LIKE YOU, RED,
AND I LIKE TOMATOES
A LOT. BELIEVE ME.
AND I LIKE YOUR RED HAIR, AND
YOU KNOW WHAT? I LIKE YOUR TRUCK.
I'M GOING TO BORROW IT. HEY!
I'LL GET IT RIGHT BACK TO YOU.
HEY! YOU GET BACK HERE!
OPEN THAT DOOR!
HEY! HEY! HOLD IT!
COUSIN HAROLD!
COUSIN HAROLD,
THAT BOY JUST SMASHED
EVERY ONE OF MY TOMATOES.
SMASHED YOUR TOMATOES?
HE'S TRESPASSING ON MY PROPERTY,
AND NOW HE'S TRYING
TO STEAL MY TRUCK.
GET OUT OF THAT TRUCK
WITH YOUR HANDS UP! NOW!
HA HA.
HI, GUYS.
LISTEN. YOU GUYS ARE
MAKING A BIG MISTAKE HERE.
LOOK, I'M JUST LATE
FOR MY WEDDING.
SEE, LOOK AT THIS. I GOT MY
TUXEDO ON AND EVERYTHING, SEE?
WELL, HERE'S A
BRACELET TO GO WITH IT.
WAIT A MINUTE, GUYS.
GUYS, YOU'RE MAKING
A BIG MISTAKE HERE.
NOPE. YOU MADE THE MISTAKE.
DO YOU KNOW WHERE YOU LANDED?
TOMATO COUNTRY?
THE MAKING OF A WEDDING...
THE SAGA CONTINUES.
THE GROOM IS NOW
25 MINUTES LATE.
HERE'S THE MAN WHO LET
HIM JUMP OUT OF A PLANE
ON HIS WEDDING DAY.
JOEY GLADSTONE.
JOEY, HOW DO YOU FEEL RIGHT NOW?
SAD. HURT.
ANGRY, BITTER, SCARED, USED.
AND I'M PRETTY HUNGRY.
I FORGOT TO EAT BREAKFAST.
POOR JOEY.
BREAKFAST IS THE MOST
IMPORTANT MEAL OF THE DAY.
AND HERE'S BECKY
WITH HER LOVING FAMILY.
ANY WORDS FOR UNCLE JESSE?
DARLING, I JUST HOPE
YOU'RE ALL RIGHT.
BUT IF YOU ARE ALL
RIGHT, I'LL KILL YOU.
DADDY, WHERE'S UNCLE JESSE?
HOLD ON, PLEASE.
HONEY, I'M TRYING TO FIND OUT.
WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO FIND OUT?
WHEN I FIND OUT, HOWIE.
DID YOU FIND OUT YET?
KIDS, IF YOU DON'T STOP THIS,
I'M GONNA TURN THIS
WEDDING AROUND
AND DRIVE RIGHT HOME.
DADDY, YOU NEED A NAP.
YEAH. PLEASE CALL ME
IF YOU HEAR ANYTHING.
YES, SIR. AND I'LL TRY
TO SQUEEZE IN THAT NAP.
THANK YOU.
DADDY, IS IT TIME FOR
THE WEDDING CAKE?
MICHELLE, WE CAN'T HAVE CAKE
UNTIL WE HAVE A PARTY.
AND WE CAN'T HAVE A PARTY
UNTIL WE HAVE A WEDDING.
HOWIE, WILL YOU MARRY ME?
WHY?
SO WE COULD EAT WEDDING CAKE.
IS IT CHOCOLATE CAKE?
WHO CARES?
IT'S THIS BIG, AND
IT GOTS FROSTING.
[TELEPHONE RINGS]
HELLO?
IT'S JESSE. JESSE,
TELL ME WHAT'S...
LET ME TALK TO HIM. ARE YOU OK?
HE'S OK.
OH, GOOD.
WHAT?
WELL, STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE.
DANNY, JOEY,
DON'T LET ANY OF
THE GUESTS LEAVE.
I'M COMING BACK, AND WE'RE
GONNA HAVE A WEDDING.
DAD, I NEED YOUR CAR
KEYS AND YOUR WALLET. NOW.
BUT, HONEY... SHE
SAID NOW. YES, DEAR.
BECKY, WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
TO TOMATO COUNTRY, TO
BAIL MY GROOM OUT OF JAIL.
SHE BETTER HURRY.
SHE'S GOING TO MISS THE WEDDING.
THIS CROWD IS GETTING RESTLESS.
YOU GUYS BETTER LOCK THE EXITS.
JOEY, WE HAVE TO TELL
THESE PEOPLE SOMETHING.
WE CAN'T TELL THEM THE TRUTH.
BUT I CAN'T LIE IN CHURCH.
NEITHER CAN I.
WE'LL TAKE THEM OUT
TO THE PARKING LOT
AND WE'LL LIE TO THEM THERE.
THAT IS A DUMB IDEA.
WHAT'S UP?
WHERE'S MY BABY?
OH.
UM... WELL... THE
TRUTH IS... YOUR SON...
WOULD EVERYBODY
LIKE TO ACCOMPANY ME
TO THE PARKING LOT?
I KNOW WHY JESSE'S LATE!
HE'S IN THE SLAMMER!
YOU CAN ALL SIT DOWN NOW.
LOOK, YOU GOTTA LET
ME OUTTA HERE, MAN.
I'M GETTING MARRIED RIGHT NOW.
WHY DON'T YOU BELIEVE ME?
BECAUSE NOBODY
JUMPS OUT OF A PLANE
ON THEIR WEDDING DAY.
JESSE.
TOLD YOU.
HI, HONEY.
HELLO, DARLING.
YOU LOOK MAD. ARE YOU MAD?
UH-HUH.
OH, YOU'RE SO CUTE
WHEN YOU'RE MAD.
AND RIGHT NOW, YOU'RE
ABOUT THE CUTEST
I'VE EVER SEEN YOU.
JESS, ARE YOU INSANE?
HOW COULD YOU DO THIS
ON OUR WEDDING DAY?
ACTUALLY, THIS IS REALLY FUNNY.
YOU'RE GONNA LAUGH.
MAYBE YOU WON'T LAUGH.
NO, YOU'RE NOT GONNA LAUGH.
YOU SEE, I HAD THIS
LONG TALK WITH YOUR DAD,
AND HE TALKED TO ME
ABOUT SETTLING DOWN
AND BEING RESPONSIBLE,
AND I HAD TO GO OUT
AND GET THIS ONE LAST ADVENTURE.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN,
"ONE LAST ADVENTURE"?
JESS, THE ADVENTURE
IS JUST BEGINNING.
FOR BOTH OF US.
SHARING OUR LIVES
AND HAVING A FAMILY.
AND, HEY, IF YOU WANNA JUMP
OUT OF A PLANE, JUST LET ME KNOW.
I'LL STRAP ON A CHUTE, I'LL
BE RIGHT THERE NEXT TO YOU.
THE POINT IS,
WHATEVER THE ADVENTURE,
LET'S JUST DO IT TOGETHER.
DARLING, YOU'RE THE BEST.
THIS IS BEAUTIFUL.
I'M DROPPING ALL THE CHARGES.
REALLY? YOU'RE GONNA
LET ME OUT OF HERE?
YEAH, I AM.
IT'S VALENTINE'S DAY.
THERE YOU GO.
JUST CALL ME CUPID.
QUICK, EVERYBODY'S
WAITING. WE CAN STILL MAKE IT.
HEY. HEY. HEY. WAIT A MINUTE.
GOT A LITTLE WEDDING
PRESENT FOR YOU.
OH, THANKS, BUT I
DON'T REALLY LIKE TOMA...
SHE LOVES TOMATOES.
THEY'RE HER FAVORITE FRUIT.
I THOUGHT THEY WERE A VEGETABLE.
LET'S GO GET MARRIED. THANK YOU.
NICE KIDS.
HEY!
HOLD!
WAIT! HOLD UP!
MY FATHER'S CAR!
WE GOTTA GET TO OUR WEDDING!
YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME!
I'M A BRIDE!
AND I'M A GROOM!
HEY! HEY!
HEY!
I'M NEVER GONNA CATCH THAT
TOW TRUCK IN THESE HEELS.
THERE'S A BUS.
STOP THE BUS! WHOA, STOP!
STOP! STOP!
ALL RIGHT. WE'RE IN LUCK.
THANKS.
HI.
HI. WE NEED A RIDE
TO SAN FRANCISCO.
SORRY, WE'RE REALLY
NOT GOING THAT WAY.
BUT MY WEDDING! WE'RE LATE.
HE JUMPED OUT OF A PLANE.
JAIL... MY FATHER'S
CAR... I HATE TOMATOES.
WAIT A MINUTE.
AREN'T YOU ON WAKE
UP, SAN FRANCISCO?
YES, I AM.
HI, I'M REBECCA DONALDSON,
AND THIS IS MY FIANCE
JESSE KATSOPOLIS.
HI.
HI. WELL, HOP ON.
OH, GREAT.
OH, THANK YOU. THANK YOU.
THANK YOU, WE REALLY
APPRECIATE THIS.
HI. HELLO. All: HI.
OK, NOW YOU GO OUT TO THE
HIGHWAY, YOU TURN LEFT, THEN...
WHY DON'T I JUST DRIVE?
HEY. IT'S YOUR WEDDING DAY.
GREAT.
BECKY, YOU'RE
GONNA DRIVE THE BUS?
HEY, YOU HAD YOUR ADVENTURE.
NOW I'M GONNA HAVE MINE.
HI, EVERYBODY.
All: HI!
HIT IT, DARLING.
♪ YOU SAY PO-TAY-TO ♪
♪ YOU SAY PO-TAH-TO ♪
♪ YOU SAY TO-MAY-TO ♪
♪ YOU SAY TO-MAH-TO ♪
♪ PO-TAY-TO ♪
♪ PO-TAH-TO ♪
♪ TO-MAY-TO ♪
♪ TO-MAH-TO ♪
♪ LET'S CALL THE
WHOLE THING OFF ♪♪
OK, EVERYBODY.
FIRST THE BRIDE'S SIDE.
♪ YOU SAY PA-JAH-MAS ♪
♪ YOU SAY PA-JAM-MAS ♪
♪ YOU SAY BA-HAH-MAS ♪
♪ YOU SAY BA-HAM-MAS ♪
[CHOIR SINGS]
ALL RIGHT! TOO MUCH!
THANK YOU, EVERYBODY!
THANK YOU! COME ON, LET'S GO.
THANK YOU!
LET'S GO!
WHOO!
WE CAN STILL MAKE IT!
♪ BA-HAH-MAS ♪
STOP THE MUSIC!
STOP THE MUSIC!
STOP THE MUSIC!
STOP THE MUSIC!
UNCLE JESSE IS HERE.
ARE YOU SURE, MICHELLE?
I KNOW WHAT HE LOOKS
LIKE. HE'S MY UNCLE.
UNCLE JESSE AND
REBECCA ARE BACK.
WE'RE GONNA HAVE THE WEDDING.
ALL RIGHT! THIS IS GREAT!
I JUST SAID THAT.
MAYBE WHEN I'M 5,
PEOPLE WILL LISTEN.
HI, EVERYONE. SORRY I'M LATE.
HI. HI. SORRY I'M LATE.
I WAS CAUGHT IN A TREE.
ACTUALLY, I WAS
CAUGHT IN A TREE.
NICE SUIT. HI, MOM, DAD.
HONEY! NICE TO SEE YA. HEY.
HEY, FA... WHOA.
AND HIT IT.
STOP THE WEDDING!
MICHELLE, WHAT'S
THE MATTER, HONEY?
I RAN OUT OF FLOWERS. I'M SORRY.
UM... SWEETHEART.
IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT
YOU RAN OUT OF FLOWERS.
THE PROBLEM IS THE
CHURCH IS MUCH TOO LONG.
WASN'T SHE TERRIFIC, EVERYBODY?
I DID THE BEST I COULD.
[THE WEDDING MARCH PLAYS]
WHO GIVES THIS
WOMAN TO THIS MAN?
HER MOTHER AND I DO.
DAD.
LET GO.
SORRY, BABY.
DEARLY BELOVED,
WE'VE WAITED A LONG TIME
FOR THIS HAPPY OCCASION.
A VERY LONG TIME.
MAY I HAVE THE RINGS, PLEASE?
THANK YOU.
THANK YOU. AND THANK YOU.
YOU'RE WELCOME.
AND YOU'RE WELCOME.
JESSE.
PLACE THIS RING ON
REBECCA'S FINGER,
AND SAY, "WITH THIS
RING, I THEE WED."
WITH THIS RING, I THEE WED.
AND, REBECCA,
YOU PLACE THIS RING
ON JESSE'S FINGER,
AND SAY, "WITH THIS
RING, I THEE WED."
WITH THIS RING, I THEE WED.
AT THIS TIME, JESSE WOULD LIKE
TO PLEDGE HIS LOVE
FOR REBECCA WITH MUSIC.
♪ IF EVERY WORD I SAID ♪
♪ COULD MAKE YOU LAUGH ♪
♪ I'D TALK FOREVER, MMM ♪
♪ I'D ASK THE SKY
JUST WHAT WE HAD ♪
♪ MMM, IT SHOWED FOREVER ♪
♪ IF THE SONG I SING TO YOU ♪
♪ COULD FILL YOUR
HEART WITH JOY ♪
♪ I'D SING FOREVER ♪
♪ FOREVER, FOREVER ♪
♪ I'VE BEEN SO
HAPPY LOVING YOU ♪
♪ HEY, HEY, LET
ME SING FOREVER ♪
♪ I WANNA BE LOVED FOREVER ♪
♪ HEY, HEY, LET
ME SING FOREVER ♪
♪ I WANNA BE LOVED FOREVER ♪
♪ OOH, OOH, OOH ♪
♪ IF EVERY WORD I SAID ♪
♪ COULD MAKE YOU LAUGH ♪
♪ I'D TALK FOREVER ♪
♪ TOGETHER MY LOVE ♪
♪ OH, FOREVER ♪
♪ FOREVER ♪
♪ I'VE BEEN SO
HAPPY LOVING YOU ♪
♪ OOH, OOH ♪
♪ OOH, OOH, OOH ♪
♪ LET THE LOVE I HAVE FOR YOU ♪
♪ LIVE IN YOUR HEART
AND BE FOREVER ♪
♪ FOREVER, FOREVER ♪
♪ I'LL BE SO HAPPY LOVING YOU ♪
MAY YOUR LIFE BE FILLED
WITH HARMONY FOREVER.
REBECCA, DO YOU TAKE THIS MAN
TO BE YOUR LAWFULLY
WEDDED HUSBAND,
TO LOVE AND TO CHERISH
FOR AS LONG AS
YOU BOTH SHALL LIVE?
I DO.
JESSE, DO YOU TAKE THIS WOMAN
TO BE YOUR LAWFULLY WEDDED WIFE,
TO LOVE AND TO CHERISH
FOR AS LONG AS
YOU BOTH SHALL LIVE?
I DO.
I NOW PRONOUNCE
YOU HUSBAND AND WIFE.
YOU MAY NOW... GO
ON KISSING THE BRIDE.
I NOW PRESENT MR. AND
MRS. KATSOPOLIS.
♪ HALLELUJAH ♪
♪ HALLELUJAH ♪
♪ HALLELUJAH, HALLELUJAH ♪
♪ HALLELUJAH, HALLELUJAH ♪
♪ HALLE ♪
♪ LU ♪
♪ JAH ♪
EXCUSE ME. EXCUSE ME.
HI, GROOM WAS
LATE. LOST THE HALL.
HAVE A COASTER.
HEY, YOU.
JUST LOOKING.
YEAH. JUST LOOKING FOR
A GOOD SPOT TO DIVE IN.
TRY SOME PATE.
WELL, WHAT DO YOU THINK?
EXCUSE ME. I HAVE TO GO SPIT.
A TOAST.
Crowd: A TOAST!
YOU KNOW, ONE OF
THE JOYS OF FRIENDSHIP
IS THE HAPPINESS YOU FEEL
WHEN YOU KNOW HOW
HAPPY YOUR FRIENDS ARE,
AND I THINK WE ALL KNOW
HOW HAPPY JESSE AND BECKY ARE.
AND SEEING THOSE TWO
WACKY NUTS SO HAPPY...
DANNY, TAKE IT. I'M TOO HAPPY.
AW, JOEY, YOU BIG SOFTY.
YOU KNOW, AS I LOOK AT ALL
YOU HAPPY, SMILING PEOPLE
WITH YOUR GLASSES RAISED,
I CAN'T HELP BUT THINK
THERE ARE SO MANY OF YOU,
AND SO FEW COASTERS
TO GO AROUND.
SO SHARE THOSE COASTERS...
HEY, WHILE WE'RE YOUNG!
[PEOPLE SHOUTING]
OH, THERE'S A LOT
OF LOVE IN THIS ROOM.
TO JESSE AND REBECCA.
MAY YOU HAVE A
WONDERFUL LIFE TOGETHER.
I LOVE YOU GUYS.
TO JESSE AND REBECCA.
TO JESSE AND REBECCA.
THANK YOU, EVERYBODY.
ATTENTION, EVERYONE! ATTENTION!
IT'S TIME FOR THE FIRST DANCE
BY THE BRIDE AND THE GROOM:
MY UNCLE JESSE AND
MY NEW AUNT BECKY.
OK, PEOPLE. MOVE
IT! MOVE IT! MOVE IT!
MOVE IT OR LOSE IT! COME ON!
THESE PEOPLE HAVE TO
HAVE ROOM TO DANCE, NOW.
COME ON. OK. COME ON.
HURRY IT UP.
I DON'T KNOW HOW LONG I
CAN HOLD THESE PEOPLE.
WELL, AS OUR WEDDING SONG,
NATURALLY I WANTED MY
FAVORITE SONG, JAILHOUSE ROCK.
BUT I WANTED A ROMANTIC BALLAD.
SO, AS THE FIRST OF VERY
MANY, MANY, MANY COMPROMISES
AS HUSBAND AND WIFE,
WE CAME UP WITH A LITTLE THING.
IT GOES SOMETHING LIKE THIS.
I HOPE YOU ALL ENJOY IT.
♪ WARDEN THREW A PARTY ♪
♪ IN THE COUNTY JAIL ♪
♪ THE PRISON BAND WAS THERE ♪
♪ THEY BEGAN TO WAIL ♪
♪ THE BAND WAS JUMPIN' ♪
♪ AND THE JOINT ♪
♪ BEGAN TO SWING ♪
OH, THAT'S SWEET.
NOW, LET'S ROCK!
♪ YOU SHOULD'VE HEARD THOSE
KNOCKED OUT JAILBIRDS SING ♪
♪ LET'S ROCK ♪
♪ EVERYBODY, LET'S ROCK ♪
♪ EVERYBODY IN THE
WHOLE CELL BLOCK ♪
♪ WAS DANCIN' TO
THE JAILHOUSE ROCK ♪
♪ SPIDER MURPHY PLAYED
THE TENOR SAXOPHONE ♪
♪ LITTLE JOE WAS BLOWIN'
ON THE SLIDE TROMBONE ♪
♪ THE DRUMMER
BOY FROM ILLINOIS ♪
♪ WENT CRASH, BOOM, BANG ♪
♪ THE WHOLE RHYTHM SECTION ♪
♪ WAS THE PURPLE GANG ♪
♪ LET'S ROCK ♪
♪ EVERYBODY, LET'S ROCK ♪
♪ WHOO ♪
♪ EVERYBODY IN THE
WHOLE CELL BLOCK ♪
♪ WAS DANCIN' TO
THE JAILHOUSE ROCK ♪
♪ I SAID DANCIN' TO
THE JAILHOUSE ROCK ♪
♪ DANCIN' TO THE
JAILHOUSE ROCK ♪
♪ OH, DANCIN' TO
THE JAILHOUSE ROCK ♪
♪ I SAID DANCIN' TO
THE JAILHOUSE ROCK ♪
♪ EVERYBODY IN THE
WHOLE CELL BLOCK ♪
♪ WAS DANCIN' TO
THE JAILHOUSE ROCK ♪
♪ EVERYBODY IN THE
WHOLE CELL BLOCK ♪
♪ WAS DANCIN' TO
THE JAILHOUSE ROCK ♪
♪ OH, YEAH, YEAH ♪
CAPTIONING MADE
POSSIBLE BY WARNER BROS.
WENT BANANAS.
"DEAR FAMILY, YOU MUST BE
WONDERING WHERE I WENT.
"I KIDNAPPED JOEY, BUT WE'LL
BE BACK FOR THE WEDDING.
"THERE WAS ONE
LAST THING I HAD TO DO
BEFORE I GOT MARRIED."
HAVE MERCY!
YOU TOOK HIM SKYDIVING?
WELL, THEN, WHERE IS HE?
WHAT IF SOMETHING
HAPPENED TO HIM?
HELP!
WHAT WILL HAPPEN NEXT?
EVEN I DON'T KNOW.
♪ AHH ♪
♪ AHH ♪
♪ WHATEVER HAPPENED
TO PREDICTABILITY ♪
♪ THE MILKMAN, THE PAPER BOY ♪
♪ EVENIN' TV ♪
♪ HOW DID I GET DELIVERED HERE ♪
♪ SOMEBODY TELL ME, PLEASE ♪
♪ THIS OLD WORLD'S ♪
♪ CONFUSIN' ME ♪
♪ CLOUDS AS MEAN
AS YOU'VE EVER SEEN ♪
♪ AIN'T A BIRD WHO
KNOWS YOUR TUNE ♪
♪ THEN A LITTLE VOICE
INSIDE YOU WHISPERS ♪
♪ KID, DON'T SELL YOUR
DREAMS SO SOON ♪
♪ EVERYWHERE YOU LOOK ♪
♪ EVERYWHERE YOU LOOK ♪
♪ THERE'S A HEART ♪
♪ A HAND TO HOLD ON TO ♪
♪ EVERYWHERE YOU LOOK ♪
♪ EVERYWHERE YOU LOOK ♪
♪ THERE'S A FACE ♪
♪ OF SOMEBODY WHO NEEDS YOU ♪
♪ EVERYWHERE YOU LOOK ♪
♪ WHEN YOU'RE LOST OUT THERE ♪
♪ AND YOU'RE ALL ALONE ♪
♪ A LIGHT IS WAITIN' ♪
♪ TO CARRY YOU HOME ♪
♪ EVERYWHERE YOU LOOK ♪
♪ EVERYWHERE YOU LOOK ♪
♪ DO BE DO BA BA DA ♪♪
CAPTIONING MADE
POSSIBLE BY WARNER BROS.
HEY! HELP!
HELP ME!
HEY, YOU! WITH THE TOMATO TRUCK!
STOP!
I'M UP IN THE TREE! UP HERE!
HEY, WHAT YOU DOING
UP THERE, FELLA?
OH, JUST ENJOYING THE VIEW!
WHAT DO YOU THINK I'M DOING?
COULD YOU HELP ME DOWN, PLEASE!
WELL, YEAH. SURE.
I'LL TELL YOU WHAT.
I'LL GO GET OLD MAN
HUDSON'S CHERRY PICKER.
ALL RIGHT, WELL, HURRY UP.
I WAS SUPPOSED TO BE AT
MY WEDDING 10 MINUTES AGO.
THANKS.
WELL, I IMAGINE
WE'LL HAVE YOU DOWN
IN 2, 3 HOURS, TOPS.
NOW, DON'T YOU GO ANYWHERE.
WHAT?
I CAN'T WAIT THAT LONG.
MERCY!
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
THOSE ARE MY PRIZE TOMATOES
YOU JUST SQUASHED.
WELL, THEY'RE NOT
TOMATOES ANYMORE.
THEY'RE KETCHUP.
I JUST CUT OUT THE MIDDLEMAN.
ALL RIGHT, IS THAT...
IS THAT SOME SORT
OF TOMATO JOKE?
YOU BETTER WATCH
YOUR MOUTH, BOY.
THIS HERE'S TOMATO COUNTRY.
LOOK. LOOK. LOOK.
I HAVE NOTHING BUT
THE HIGHEST REGARD
FOR TOMATOES, AND THE MEN
AND WOMEN THAT DO GROW THEM,
BUT I NEED A RIDE TO SAN
FRANCISCO RIGHT NOW.
I DON'T GIVE RIDES TO
TOMATO SQUASHERS.
THIS IS MY LIFE WE'RE
TALKING ABOUT, OK?
NOT SOME DUMB VEGETABLE.
IT'S A FRUIT.
FRUIT, VEGETABLE.
LOOK, THE POINT
IS... I LIKE YOU, RED,
AND I LIKE TOMATOES
A LOT. BELIEVE ME.
AND I LIKE YOUR RED HAIR, AND
YOU KNOW WHAT? I LIKE YOUR TRUCK.
I'M GOING TO BORROW IT. HEY!
I'LL GET IT RIGHT BACK TO YOU.
HEY! YOU GET BACK HERE!
OPEN THAT DOOR!
HEY! HEY! HOLD IT!
COUSIN HAROLD!
COUSIN HAROLD,
THAT BOY JUST SMASHED
EVERY ONE OF MY TOMATOES.
SMASHED YOUR TOMATOES?
HE'S TRESPASSING ON MY PROPERTY,
AND NOW HE'S TRYING
TO STEAL MY TRUCK.
GET OUT OF THAT TRUCK
WITH YOUR HANDS UP! NOW!
HA HA.
HI, GUYS.
LISTEN. YOU GUYS ARE
MAKING A BIG MISTAKE HERE.
LOOK, I'M JUST LATE
FOR MY WEDDING.
SEE, LOOK AT THIS. I GOT MY
TUXEDO ON AND EVERYTHING, SEE?
WELL, HERE'S A
BRACELET TO GO WITH IT.
WAIT A MINUTE, GUYS.
GUYS, YOU'RE MAKING
A BIG MISTAKE HERE.
NOPE. YOU MADE THE MISTAKE.
DO YOU KNOW WHERE YOU LANDED?
TOMATO COUNTRY?
THE MAKING OF A WEDDING...
THE SAGA CONTINUES.
THE GROOM IS NOW
25 MINUTES LATE.
HERE'S THE MAN WHO LET
HIM JUMP OUT OF A PLANE
ON HIS WEDDING DAY.
JOEY GLADSTONE.
JOEY, HOW DO YOU FEEL RIGHT NOW?
SAD. HURT.
ANGRY, BITTER, SCARED, USED.
AND I'M PRETTY HUNGRY.
I FORGOT TO EAT BREAKFAST.
POOR JOEY.
BREAKFAST IS THE MOST
IMPORTANT MEAL OF THE DAY.
AND HERE'S BECKY
WITH HER LOVING FAMILY.
ANY WORDS FOR UNCLE JESSE?
DARLING, I JUST HOPE
YOU'RE ALL RIGHT.
BUT IF YOU ARE ALL
RIGHT, I'LL KILL YOU.
DADDY, WHERE'S UNCLE JESSE?
HOLD ON, PLEASE.
HONEY, I'M TRYING TO FIND OUT.
WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO FIND OUT?
WHEN I FIND OUT, HOWIE.
DID YOU FIND OUT YET?
KIDS, IF YOU DON'T STOP THIS,
I'M GONNA TURN THIS
WEDDING AROUND
AND DRIVE RIGHT HOME.
DADDY, YOU NEED A NAP.
YEAH. PLEASE CALL ME
IF YOU HEAR ANYTHING.
YES, SIR. AND I'LL TRY
TO SQUEEZE IN THAT NAP.
THANK YOU.
DADDY, IS IT TIME FOR
THE WEDDING CAKE?
MICHELLE, WE CAN'T HAVE CAKE
UNTIL WE HAVE A PARTY.
AND WE CAN'T HAVE A PARTY
UNTIL WE HAVE A WEDDING.
HOWIE, WILL YOU MARRY ME?
WHY?
SO WE COULD EAT WEDDING CAKE.
IS IT CHOCOLATE CAKE?
WHO CARES?
IT'S THIS BIG, AND
IT GOTS FROSTING.
[TELEPHONE RINGS]
HELLO?
IT'S JESSE. JESSE,
TELL ME WHAT'S...
LET ME TALK TO HIM. ARE YOU OK?
HE'S OK.
OH, GOOD.
WHAT?
WELL, STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE.
DANNY, JOEY,
DON'T LET ANY OF
THE GUESTS LEAVE.
I'M COMING BACK, AND WE'RE
GONNA HAVE A WEDDING.
DAD, I NEED YOUR CAR
KEYS AND YOUR WALLET. NOW.
BUT, HONEY... SHE
SAID NOW. YES, DEAR.
BECKY, WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
TO TOMATO COUNTRY, TO
BAIL MY GROOM OUT OF JAIL.
SHE BETTER HURRY.
SHE'S GOING TO MISS THE WEDDING.
THIS CROWD IS GETTING RESTLESS.
YOU GUYS BETTER LOCK THE EXITS.
JOEY, WE HAVE TO TELL
THESE PEOPLE SOMETHING.
WE CAN'T TELL THEM THE TRUTH.
BUT I CAN'T LIE IN CHURCH.
NEITHER CAN I.
WE'LL TAKE THEM OUT
TO THE PARKING LOT
AND WE'LL LIE TO THEM THERE.
THAT IS A DUMB IDEA.
WHAT'S UP?
WHERE'S MY BABY?
OH.
UM... WELL... THE
TRUTH IS... YOUR SON...
WOULD EVERYBODY
LIKE TO ACCOMPANY ME
TO THE PARKING LOT?
I KNOW WHY JESSE'S LATE!
HE'S IN THE SLAMMER!
YOU CAN ALL SIT DOWN NOW.
LOOK, YOU GOTTA LET
ME OUTTA HERE, MAN.
I'M GETTING MARRIED RIGHT NOW.
WHY DON'T YOU BELIEVE ME?
BECAUSE NOBODY
JUMPS OUT OF A PLANE
ON THEIR WEDDING DAY.
JESSE.
TOLD YOU.
HI, HONEY.
HELLO, DARLING.
YOU LOOK MAD. ARE YOU MAD?
UH-HUH.
OH, YOU'RE SO CUTE
WHEN YOU'RE MAD.
AND RIGHT NOW, YOU'RE
ABOUT THE CUTEST
I'VE EVER SEEN YOU.
JESS, ARE YOU INSANE?
HOW COULD YOU DO THIS
ON OUR WEDDING DAY?
ACTUALLY, THIS IS REALLY FUNNY.
YOU'RE GONNA LAUGH.
MAYBE YOU WON'T LAUGH.
NO, YOU'RE NOT GONNA LAUGH.
YOU SEE, I HAD THIS
LONG TALK WITH YOUR DAD,
AND HE TALKED TO ME
ABOUT SETTLING DOWN
AND BEING RESPONSIBLE,
AND I HAD TO GO OUT
AND GET THIS ONE LAST ADVENTURE.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN,
"ONE LAST ADVENTURE"?
JESS, THE ADVENTURE
IS JUST BEGINNING.
FOR BOTH OF US.
SHARING OUR LIVES
AND HAVING A FAMILY.
AND, HEY, IF YOU WANNA JUMP
OUT OF A PLANE, JUST LET ME KNOW.
I'LL STRAP ON A CHUTE, I'LL
BE RIGHT THERE NEXT TO YOU.
THE POINT IS,
WHATEVER THE ADVENTURE,
LET'S JUST DO IT TOGETHER.
DARLING, YOU'RE THE BEST.
THIS IS BEAUTIFUL.
I'M DROPPING ALL THE CHARGES.
REALLY? YOU'RE GONNA
LET ME OUT OF HERE?
YEAH, I AM.
IT'S VALENTINE'S DAY.
THERE YOU GO.
JUST CALL ME CUPID.
QUICK, EVERYBODY'S
WAITING. WE CAN STILL MAKE IT.
HEY. HEY. HEY. WAIT A MINUTE.
GOT A LITTLE WEDDING
PRESENT FOR YOU.
OH, THANKS, BUT I
DON'T REALLY LIKE TOMA...
SHE LOVES TOMATOES.
THEY'RE HER FAVORITE FRUIT.
I THOUGHT THEY WERE A VEGETABLE.
LET'S GO GET MARRIED. THANK YOU.
NICE KIDS.
HEY!
HOLD!
WAIT! HOLD UP!
MY FATHER'S CAR!
WE GOTTA GET TO OUR WEDDING!
YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME!
I'M A BRIDE!
AND I'M A GROOM!
HEY! HEY!
HEY!
I'M NEVER GONNA CATCH THAT
TOW TRUCK IN THESE HEELS.
THERE'S A BUS.
STOP THE BUS! WHOA, STOP!
STOP! STOP!
ALL RIGHT. WE'RE IN LUCK.
THANKS.
HI.
HI. WE NEED A RIDE
TO SAN FRANCISCO.
SORRY, WE'RE REALLY
NOT GOING THAT WAY.
BUT MY WEDDING! WE'RE LATE.
HE JUMPED OUT OF A PLANE.
JAIL... MY FATHER'S
CAR... I HATE TOMATOES.
WAIT A MINUTE.
AREN'T YOU ON WAKE
UP, SAN FRANCISCO?
YES, I AM.
HI, I'M REBECCA DONALDSON,
AND THIS IS MY FIANCE
JESSE KATSOPOLIS.
HI.
HI. WELL, HOP ON.
OH, GREAT.
OH, THANK YOU. THANK YOU.
THANK YOU, WE REALLY
APPRECIATE THIS.
HI. HELLO. All: HI.
OK, NOW YOU GO OUT TO THE
HIGHWAY, YOU TURN LEFT, THEN...
WHY DON'T I JUST DRIVE?
HEY. IT'S YOUR WEDDING DAY.
GREAT.
BECKY, YOU'RE
GONNA DRIVE THE BUS?
HEY, YOU HAD YOUR ADVENTURE.
NOW I'M GONNA HAVE MINE.
HI, EVERYBODY.
All: HI!
HIT IT, DARLING.
♪ YOU SAY PO-TAY-TO ♪
♪ YOU SAY PO-TAH-TO ♪
♪ YOU SAY TO-MAY-TO ♪
♪ YOU SAY TO-MAH-TO ♪
♪ PO-TAY-TO ♪
♪ PO-TAH-TO ♪
♪ TO-MAY-TO ♪
♪ TO-MAH-TO ♪
♪ LET'S CALL THE
WHOLE THING OFF ♪♪
OK, EVERYBODY.
FIRST THE BRIDE'S SIDE.
♪ YOU SAY PA-JAH-MAS ♪
♪ YOU SAY PA-JAM-MAS ♪
♪ YOU SAY BA-HAH-MAS ♪
♪ YOU SAY BA-HAM-MAS ♪
[CHOIR SINGS]
ALL RIGHT! TOO MUCH!
THANK YOU, EVERYBODY!
THANK YOU! COME ON, LET'S GO.
THANK YOU!
LET'S GO!
WHOO!
WE CAN STILL MAKE IT!
♪ BA-HAH-MAS ♪
STOP THE MUSIC!
STOP THE MUSIC!
STOP THE MUSIC!
STOP THE MUSIC!
UNCLE JESSE IS HERE.
ARE YOU SURE, MICHELLE?
I KNOW WHAT HE LOOKS
LIKE. HE'S MY UNCLE.
UNCLE JESSE AND
REBECCA ARE BACK.
WE'RE GONNA HAVE THE WEDDING.
ALL RIGHT! THIS IS GREAT!
I JUST SAID THAT.
MAYBE WHEN I'M 5,
PEOPLE WILL LISTEN.
HI, EVERYONE. SORRY I'M LATE.
HI. HI. SORRY I'M LATE.
I WAS CAUGHT IN A TREE.
ACTUALLY, I WAS
CAUGHT IN A TREE.
NICE SUIT. HI, MOM, DAD.
HONEY! NICE TO SEE YA. HEY.
HEY, FA... WHOA.
AND HIT IT.
STOP THE WEDDING!
MICHELLE, WHAT'S
THE MATTER, HONEY?
I RAN OUT OF FLOWERS. I'M SORRY.
UM... SWEETHEART.
IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT
YOU RAN OUT OF FLOWERS.
THE PROBLEM IS THE
CHURCH IS MUCH TOO LONG.
WASN'T SHE TERRIFIC, EVERYBODY?
I DID THE BEST I COULD.
[THE WEDDING MARCH PLAYS]
WHO GIVES THIS
WOMAN TO THIS MAN?
HER MOTHER AND I DO.
DAD.
LET GO.
SORRY, BABY.
DEARLY BELOVED,
WE'VE WAITED A LONG TIME
FOR THIS HAPPY OCCASION.
A VERY LONG TIME.
MAY I HAVE THE RINGS, PLEASE?
THANK YOU.
THANK YOU. AND THANK YOU.
YOU'RE WELCOME.
AND YOU'RE WELCOME.
JESSE.
PLACE THIS RING ON
REBECCA'S FINGER,
AND SAY, "WITH THIS
RING, I THEE WED."
WITH THIS RING, I THEE WED.
AND, REBECCA,
YOU PLACE THIS RING
ON JESSE'S FINGER,
AND SAY, "WITH THIS
RING, I THEE WED."
WITH THIS RING, I THEE WED.
AT THIS TIME, JESSE WOULD LIKE
TO PLEDGE HIS LOVE
FOR REBECCA WITH MUSIC.
♪ IF EVERY WORD I SAID ♪
♪ COULD MAKE YOU LAUGH ♪
♪ I'D TALK FOREVER, MMM ♪
♪ I'D ASK THE SKY
JUST WHAT WE HAD ♪
♪ MMM, IT SHOWED FOREVER ♪
♪ IF THE SONG I SING TO YOU ♪
♪ COULD FILL YOUR
HEART WITH JOY ♪
♪ I'D SING FOREVER ♪
♪ FOREVER, FOREVER ♪
♪ I'VE BEEN SO
HAPPY LOVING YOU ♪
♪ HEY, HEY, LET
ME SING FOREVER ♪
♪ I WANNA BE LOVED FOREVER ♪
♪ HEY, HEY, LET
ME SING FOREVER ♪
♪ I WANNA BE LOVED FOREVER ♪
♪ OOH, OOH, OOH ♪
♪ IF EVERY WORD I SAID ♪
♪ COULD MAKE YOU LAUGH ♪
♪ I'D TALK FOREVER ♪
♪ TOGETHER MY LOVE ♪
♪ OH, FOREVER ♪
♪ FOREVER ♪
♪ I'VE BEEN SO
HAPPY LOVING YOU ♪
♪ OOH, OOH ♪
♪ OOH, OOH, OOH ♪
♪ LET THE LOVE I HAVE FOR YOU ♪
♪ LIVE IN YOUR HEART
AND BE FOREVER ♪
♪ FOREVER, FOREVER ♪
♪ I'LL BE SO HAPPY LOVING YOU ♪
MAY YOUR LIFE BE FILLED
WITH HARMONY FOREVER.
REBECCA, DO YOU TAKE THIS MAN
TO BE YOUR LAWFULLY
WEDDED HUSBAND,
TO LOVE AND TO CHERISH
FOR AS LONG AS
YOU BOTH SHALL LIVE?
I DO.
JESSE, DO YOU TAKE THIS WOMAN
TO BE YOUR LAWFULLY WEDDED WIFE,
TO LOVE AND TO CHERISH
FOR AS LONG AS
YOU BOTH SHALL LIVE?
I DO.
I NOW PRONOUNCE
YOU HUSBAND AND WIFE.
YOU MAY NOW... GO
ON KISSING THE BRIDE.
I NOW PRESENT MR. AND
MRS. KATSOPOLIS.
♪ HALLELUJAH ♪
♪ HALLELUJAH ♪
♪ HALLELUJAH, HALLELUJAH ♪
♪ HALLELUJAH, HALLELUJAH ♪
♪ HALLE ♪
♪ LU ♪
♪ JAH ♪
EXCUSE ME. EXCUSE ME.
HI, GROOM WAS
LATE. LOST THE HALL.
HAVE A COASTER.
HEY, YOU.
JUST LOOKING.
YEAH. JUST LOOKING FOR
A GOOD SPOT TO DIVE IN.
TRY SOME PATE.
WELL, WHAT DO YOU THINK?
EXCUSE ME. I HAVE TO GO SPIT.
A TOAST.
Crowd: A TOAST!
YOU KNOW, ONE OF
THE JOYS OF FRIENDSHIP
IS THE HAPPINESS YOU FEEL
WHEN YOU KNOW HOW
HAPPY YOUR FRIENDS ARE,
AND I THINK WE ALL KNOW
HOW HAPPY JESSE AND BECKY ARE.
AND SEEING THOSE TWO
WACKY NUTS SO HAPPY...
DANNY, TAKE IT. I'M TOO HAPPY.
AW, JOEY, YOU BIG SOFTY.
YOU KNOW, AS I LOOK AT ALL
YOU HAPPY, SMILING PEOPLE
WITH YOUR GLASSES RAISED,
I CAN'T HELP BUT THINK
THERE ARE SO MANY OF YOU,
AND SO FEW COASTERS
TO GO AROUND.
SO SHARE THOSE COASTERS...
HEY, WHILE WE'RE YOUNG!
[PEOPLE SHOUTING]
OH, THERE'S A LOT
OF LOVE IN THIS ROOM.
TO JESSE AND REBECCA.
MAY YOU HAVE A
WONDERFUL LIFE TOGETHER.
I LOVE YOU GUYS.
TO JESSE AND REBECCA.
TO JESSE AND REBECCA.
THANK YOU, EVERYBODY.
ATTENTION, EVERYONE! ATTENTION!
IT'S TIME FOR THE FIRST DANCE
BY THE BRIDE AND THE GROOM:
MY UNCLE JESSE AND
MY NEW AUNT BECKY.
OK, PEOPLE. MOVE
IT! MOVE IT! MOVE IT!
MOVE IT OR LOSE IT! COME ON!
THESE PEOPLE HAVE TO
HAVE ROOM TO DANCE, NOW.
COME ON. OK. COME ON.
HURRY IT UP.
I DON'T KNOW HOW LONG I
CAN HOLD THESE PEOPLE.
WELL, AS OUR WEDDING SONG,
NATURALLY I WANTED MY
FAVORITE SONG, JAILHOUSE ROCK.
BUT I WANTED A ROMANTIC BALLAD.
SO, AS THE FIRST OF VERY
MANY, MANY, MANY COMPROMISES
AS HUSBAND AND WIFE,
WE CAME UP WITH A LITTLE THING.
IT GOES SOMETHING LIKE THIS.
I HOPE YOU ALL ENJOY IT.
♪ WARDEN THREW A PARTY ♪
♪ IN THE COUNTY JAIL ♪
♪ THE PRISON BAND WAS THERE ♪
♪ THEY BEGAN TO WAIL ♪
♪ THE BAND WAS JUMPIN' ♪
♪ AND THE JOINT ♪
♪ BEGAN TO SWING ♪
OH, THAT'S SWEET.
NOW, LET'S ROCK!
♪ YOU SHOULD'VE HEARD THOSE
KNOCKED OUT JAILBIRDS SING ♪
♪ LET'S ROCK ♪
♪ EVERYBODY, LET'S ROCK ♪
♪ EVERYBODY IN THE
WHOLE CELL BLOCK ♪
♪ WAS DANCIN' TO
THE JAILHOUSE ROCK ♪
♪ SPIDER MURPHY PLAYED
THE TENOR SAXOPHONE ♪
♪ LITTLE JOE WAS BLOWIN'
ON THE SLIDE TROMBONE ♪
♪ THE DRUMMER
BOY FROM ILLINOIS ♪
♪ WENT CRASH, BOOM, BANG ♪
♪ THE WHOLE RHYTHM SECTION ♪
♪ WAS THE PURPLE GANG ♪
♪ LET'S ROCK ♪
♪ EVERYBODY, LET'S ROCK ♪
♪ WHOO ♪
♪ EVERYBODY IN THE
WHOLE CELL BLOCK ♪
♪ WAS DANCIN' TO
THE JAILHOUSE ROCK ♪
♪ I SAID DANCIN' TO
THE JAILHOUSE ROCK ♪
♪ DANCIN' TO THE
JAILHOUSE ROCK ♪
♪ OH, DANCIN' TO
THE JAILHOUSE ROCK ♪
♪ I SAID DANCIN' TO
THE JAILHOUSE ROCK ♪
♪ EVERYBODY IN THE
WHOLE CELL BLOCK ♪
♪ WAS DANCIN' TO
THE JAILHOUSE ROCK ♪
♪ EVERYBODY IN THE
WHOLE CELL BLOCK ♪
♪ WAS DANCIN' TO
THE JAILHOUSE ROCK ♪
♪ OH, YEAH, YEAH ♪
CAPTIONING MADE
POSSIBLE BY WARNER BROS.