Friday Night Lights (2006–2011): Season 3, Episode 6 - It Ain't Easy Being J.D. McCoy - full transcript

After witnessing a hazing incident involving his new starting quarterback, Coach Taylor sets a task before his team captain, Tim Riggins, the job of making J. D. McCoy feel more comfortable with the team. Matt's comfort level with his new position on the bench is felt by everyone close to him, including Julie as they continue to grow closer together. Tyra sings a different tune after her new boyfriend's family shows up on her doorstep.

How about we somewhere and talk
about anything but football?

That sounds good.

You're some cowboy who just
wanders about from town to town.

I'd like to think there's
more to you than that.

Well, sometimes I guess it just takes the
right woman to make you more than you are.

So, look, about 30 days' time.

And get you 200%
profit on your investment.

It's flipping houses.
I saw it on TV. It works.

I'm in.
You're in!

Your daddy
bought a house today.

I'm gonna fix it up
and I'm gonna sell it.



Then you and me and
your mommy can live together.

We're gonna turn it over in about
30 days, make a lot of money,

and it's gonna give us a...

I'm moving back east
with my parents.

Freshmen, listen up!

We all seniors want to thank you for
coming out of your busy schedules

and meeting us here tonight.

We've all been here, and you guys will
look back at what you're about to do

and understand that there's
a strong purpose to it.

Time has come for
a Panther ritual.

Drum roll, please.

The naked mile!

I thought that was a myth.

What did you say, Charles?



I said I thought it was a myth.

I wish it was a myth so I don't have
to see your fat ass running naked.

You heard me, ladies!
Let's go! Strip down!

Strip down!

Leave your shoes on!
Strip down! Everybody!

Take it all off!
Take it all off!

They're all running to the
water tower and back.

But you, superstar, you're
running to the field house.

Wait, what... Why do I
get to run to the...

Whoa, whoa, whoa...

'Cause you're
the quarterback, bro.

You gotta go
the extra mile, dude.

Get your ass over there.

Get out of here!

Go!

Come on!

Come here.

Um...

Where the hell are your pants?

Uh, tonight was the...

Naked mile.

Yeah.
You fell for the naked mile?

Tell you what. Why don't you
go take your team there

and go put some clothes on
and I'll give you a ride home?

Please don't tell
my dad. Okay?

Son, I wouldn't dream of it.

Good.

Gotta go.

Wanna get as far as possible
while he's still kind of calm.

Wish I knew how to stay here.

Well, it's pretty easy.
You know, you just park the car and stay.

Yeah.

When you get to
your parents' house, you know,

you just tell your mom that he gets his
good looks and perfect manners from me.

Uh-huh.

And while you're heading east, I'll
fix up this Garrity house real nice

and we're gonna
turn a major profit.

And have a nice cushion so...

You know you and Noah
and I can get a house or...

Just something.
Just be together.

Just...
Okay.

Let's see what happens, okay?

Bye, honey.

You get going. I don't want you on the
road after the sun goes down, okay?

Okay.

I love you.

I love you both, okay?

Call me.

Is that coffee?

Thank you for
making coffee, honey.

You're welcome.
Coming at you!

I'm excited about the dance
on Saturday night.

You're gonna be my hot date.
My hot husband date.

The principal has the obligation of being
the chaperone at the dance, not...

And you as my husband have an
obligation of being my date.

I'm afraid I'm not gonna be able to do that
because I've got other things to plan.

No, honey, come on.
Of course you're gonna do it.

Honey, would you get here
for a second?

Honey, and I need you to chaperone
and be my date, most importantly.

Julie's coming.
I'm not going.

Of course... Of course you're going.
Honey, it's your dance.

Not going!

What do you mean,
no you're not?

Y'all, come on, seriously!

I would like to
propose a toast...

Oh, really?

To QB One
of the Dillon Panthers.

Cheers, pal.
Congratulations!

No cheers?

No, I'll just save the toast
till after the game.

It's Westerby.
You're gonna smoke them.

Okay, here's a really
important question.

Are there any cheerleaders
you think are cute?

Yeah.
Yeah?

Oh, yeah.
Really?

There's two actually that
I should propose to.

We talked
about that now.

You can only propose
to one at a time.

Stop. J.D. is not getting serious
about any girls right now.

He's too busy.

No, honey, that was a joke.

I want to tell you something.

I know that you've experienced
a lot of pressure recently.

But you have worked hard,

and you have shown everyone
what you are made of.

And for that I am very,
very proud.

Thanks, Dad.

You are very welcome.

I want to give Coach Eric
Taylor a piece of my mind.

You are QB One.

You won State!

I did.

I did win State.

That man must have
lost his natural mind.

You're all on your way
to school.

When you get there, all you do, you
just go in, you talk to the coach.

You tell him, "You made a big mistake.
' ' All right?

"It's all right,
you can fix it.' '"

You wait till I deal with it.

I gotta get going, okay?

I'll catch you during lunch.

He thinks
he knows football!

Let's make some money!
All right!

Timmy.

Glad you could join us today.
How did you get out of school?

Did you write them
a sick note or something?

Yeah, I just told them
I'm pregnant.

So I just need
a few days to relax.

Let's get to work.

And let's start with this
here work-list.

I told you Miss Bossy Pants
had a work-list.

Oh, I see, is there a
problem with the work-list?

No, you get organized,
it's all good.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Dude, why do we have to do
everything upstairs?

I'm gonna forget you just said that.
Sorry.

And...
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I was just thinking maybe, like, the first
place we could start would be bathrooms.

But we need a sledgehammer to
start working on the bathrooms.

So if you can go pick that up,
that would be awesome.

Whatever.

I was just asking.

What the hell's wrong with him?

You're bossy.

I'm not bossy.

That was abrupt.

What is this song about?

Really, this song
is about a lot of stuff.

So it's hard for me
to explain that.

It's really slow.

It's slow for a reason. Not all songs
can be as fast as most of our songs.

Listen.

Jimmy, I hate to be
this brutally honest with you

but you're really not
all that good.

I don't think it's
all the drummer.

I don't see anyone else with any sort of...
Where are you going?

I am gonna leave.
I don't need this.

I will see you tomorrow, Jimmy.

That's it, Landry, I quit.

That's fine.
I could care less, Kaster.

You know, this sucks.

I really thought we were gonna
be bigger than Crimson Thorn.

Okay. Well, Kaster,
for your information,

I chose the name Crucifictorious,
so therefore, I keep it.

And also, I will see you
tomorrow, Jimmy,

because I know you're gonna
be right back.

No, you won't,
'cause I'm out of here.

What'd you say?

I'll see you tomorrow.

So I was thinking, how about you
take off a little early tonight?

Come by the pool hall?

I would love to, but I can't.

Really? Why, you got a date
with boyfriend number two?

Yeah, how'd you know?

No, I've gotta make decorations
for the school dance,

and I have to work overtime
for this entire month.

I don't know. College applications
are, like, 150 apiece,

so I'm lucky if I get three.

Well, how about I make things
a little easier on you?

What are you doing?

Just making sure my girl gets to go
to what college she wants to go to.

No, I can't.
Yes, you can.

No, I cannot do that.

Please? Please.

Do you wanna
go to this dance with me?

No. No, I don't. I don't wanna
go to the dance. Of course not.

High school dance.

I would love to pick you up from
the high school dance, though.

All right.
All right.

21! Open! Open!

Set, blue 8!

Blue 8, hut!

There he is! There he is!

Set your feet, J.D.

Come on, Naked Gun,
you're good!

QB bun.
Come on, QB!

Settle down into it.
Settle down, man.

Man?
He's right there.

You gotta be naked
next time, boy.

No excuse for that.
Settle down, now.

Come on, hot stuff.
Keep it together now!

Come on, Naked Gun!

Hey, Coach.
Sit down.

Yes, sir.

Naked mile.

Um, that's a Panther
tradition, Coach.

Big game coming up.
Team needs to be focused.

Team captain should know that.

J.D.' s a young quarterback.
He needs to know this team's behind him.

We are, sir,
especially on the field.

Does he know that?

Yes.
He does, huh?

You know damn well
this team respects you.

You accept this kid,

the team is gonna accept him.
I need that.

I need you to fix it.

I don't understand
what you mean. "Fix it.' '

You're a senior.

You're not gonna be wearing the
Panther uniform much longer.

I want you to think about that.

Think about
everything it means.

I'm asking for your help.

You understand what I'm saying?

Yes, sir.

Good.

McCoy. Get in.

No, I was just gonna
get on the bus.

Get in the truck, One-Two.

You've had a tour
of Dillon, right?

Yeah.
Yeah.

Well, not my Dillon,
my friend. Let's go.

Hey, where exactly
are we going?

It's on your right.
Look right.

You need to know
this spot, okay?

It's called the Landing Strip.

My sister-in-law, my brother's
future wife, works there,

and probably will
the rest of her life.

But you are not ready
for that, son.

And when you are, you'll know.

Up here, on our right,

we have Fran's Hamburgers 24I7.

Best hamburgers, best fans in
all of high school football.

The real rally girls, and I
hope you know what that means.

Good times, man.
You can tell, the kind of support we get.

All right, we got Smitty's.
Dive Bar.

Know me as Toby,
two-time Iraq veteran.

If you ever wanna get away
from anything, anyone,

you will go in there,
you hear me?

Smitty's. Best bar
on the planet.

Okay.

Lisa lives down this road.

Who?
You'll know. You'll know.

She's good times.

This is
the place, huh?

All right, man.
It was fun.

Hey, Coach put you up to this?

No. Good night, man.

Look at you.
My beautiful baby!

I think this might be the one.

You do, honey?

Mindy, I love you,
but I can see your crack.

Oh, it's just a smidge.
It's just a little bit there.

It's very tasteful.
It's subtle.

Yes, it's subtle.

Now, what are you doing?
What is this?

It's my application.

For the University
of San Francisco?

Honey, how are you gonna hang
on to that cowboy of yours

if you're all the way
out there in California?

I don't wanna hang on
to anybody.

That's mistake number one.

You know, Cash
is very supportive of me.

Oh, I know.
They are all so supportive,

and then try to actually
do something...

He gave me money
for my application fees.

He did?

Yeah.

Well, this is a very good man!

They don't normally like to
take care you just like that.

You hang on to that man.

I'm telling you, and I'm
speaking from experience.

Don't do that, don't do that.

You're not getting a burrito.

That's disgusting, Dad. Do you even realize
it doesn't even have real food in it?

It's all, like, preservatives.

Hey! How you doing?

Well, Coach Eric Taylor.

How are you, ma'am?
It's good to see you.

Oh, I'm not that good.
You wanna know why?

I'd be doing
a heck of a lot better

if I thought you were gonna
do the right thing

and make my grandson starting
quarterback like he should be.

Grandma, it's okay.
No, hush.

Hush, now. He needs to hear this.
Yes, ma'am.

This boy has played
his heart out for you.

Yes, ma'am, I know
it's difficult to understand.

We should just let them talk, maybe.

MRS.
No, it's not difficult at all!

Awkward.

Little bit.

Do you think we could go grab
a cup of coffee or something?

We could get lunch if you want.
She'll talk about this all day.

So I take it she's
taken your demotion pretty hard?

"Demotion"?
That's a little harsh.

What do you want me to say?

Okay, I guess
"demotion" is appropriate.

How has practice been?

It's good.

It's good.
I'm on the bench a lot now, but,

you know, I just get to talk to
Landry more 'cause he's always there.

All right, you think about it.
I will.

It's hard to be mad
at you, Coach Taylor.

It's good to see you again.
All right.

You be thinking
about what I said.

Yes, ma'am.
All right, bye-bye.

Billy!

Hey, guys, good news.
I got the...

What you say to me?

Billy!
What?

Hey, did you get the permits?

What the hell is
going on here? Easy.

I'm just improvising,
man, riffing.

Look, look.
Bigger, huh?

Yeah. Hey, look.

Man, that is the Cadillac
of toilets.

Yeah, check it out.
Bidet.

Bidet!
Right here. Bidet.

It cleans your butt.
Wipes your butt.

$1700?

You spent 1700 dollars
on a toilet?

You gotta spend money
to make money, Street.

We're on a budget, Billy.
And guess what?

If we exceed that budget,
we're not making any money.

So, you know what?
You just wheel this back out to the truck,

'cause that's going back.

That's going back now.
And who the hell decided to bust out this wall?

Maybe it was mine.
Billy.

That was supposed to be
a load-bearing wall, Billy.

You know, I would
have been better off

getting my grandmother and
the rest of her bridge club

to come over here
and finish this house.

Are we even looking at the work list anymore?
We doing that?

I got your work list.
I got your work list right here.

In fact, why don't we post it on this
wall over here so that nobody'll miss it?

That's a good idea,
Billy. I like that.

You don't have to talk to me
like I'm a freaking moron.

I have worked
construction before.

Whoa.

Son of a bitch.

Did that hurt? 'Cause it looks like it hurts.
Yeah, it hurts.

Shut the hell up and
get me some pliers.

Tonight marked
the first game

in which freshman J.D.
McCoy will start as QB One.

Hi, can I talk to Cash?

Cash doesn't live here.

Oh. Well, I heard he's been
hanging around a lot.

Well, you heard wrong.

Cash? Cash!

Seriously, he's not here.
He doesn't live here.

Well, when you see him, could
you tell him that I came by?

I don't know what this
is all about, but...

Really? What a surprise.
The pretty girl's out of the loop.

When you see Cash,
just tell him

that he owes Ally and Tucker
$1,600 in child support.

Okay? Can you do
that for me?

And looks like
it's gonna do it, folks.

With only 25 seconds left
in this contest,

all the Panthers have to do
is take a knee,

and they can put this one
in the books.

Blue 20! Hut!

And it's official.
This game is over.

Young gun J.D. McCoy's
debut in the Westerby game.

Unbelievable, folks.
This kid lit it up like the Fourth of July!

Another check in the win column for
Coach Taylor and the Dillon Panthers.

There you go!
There you go!

Big "W" tonight,
gentlemen. We earned it!

Good job, buddy.

Damn right I'm gonna be there.

Guess who else's gonna
be there tonight?

Who?
This cat right here.

No way. He is coming.
Hey, hey.

One-Two. Great game tonight.

We're gonna go celebrate. We're gonna
create some memories, all right, One-Two?

Yeah.
Yeah, no regrets.

There you go, Naked Gun!

Where's my boy? There he is!
That's what I'm talking about!

That is what I'm talking
about, young man!

That was one
hell of a ball game.

Way to go, way to go.
I'm so proud of you.

Riggins, what the hell?
You were bringing the heat, boy!

You were on fire!
Way to go, boy!

Excellent game.

Yeah, you played great.

Great job, guys.
Thank you, sir.

Thank you so much.
Great game.

I'm gonna...

We're gonna go celebrate with your
mom right now over at Applebee's.

Come on now, we're gonna celebrate.
Come on! Here we go.

Okay.
All right.

All right, boys, see you later.
Great game, great game.

I told you, man!
Daddy got him on a leash!

Good practice.
Hey, good video session.

All right.
All right, man.

Hey, you look
pretty sweet, you know?

I came to see you about...

Just to check in with you
about tonight.

Yep.

Tonight?

The dance.
Mmm.

The Dillon dance.
Mmm-hmm.

You totally forgot.

The Dillon dance.
Mm-hmm. Where is it?

Come on. It's in Dillon.

I just thought
it would be fun to go,

you know, to one together
before it's all over.

Are you gonna wear something
as cute as this tonight?

Maybe.

Then I'm going.
With bells on.

And we're gonna have the time of
our lives at the dance tonight.

I love dances.
I do, too.

All right, this looks good.
We'll take this whole palette.

I need it delivered
to 213 Pinehurst

by tomorrow, about noon.

You got it. JASON: Okay.
Thank you. Appreciate it.

Jason, how you doing?

Good. Hey, Coach!
How you doing?

How are you?

Doing well.
What brings you down here?

I got honey-do lists.
See you got one, too?

No, no, not quite.

The Riggins brothers and I
bought Buddy Garrity's house,

and so we're fixing it up. So I had to come
down here and pick a bunch of stuff up.

You what?

Riggins brothers and I
bought the Garrity house.

We're fixing it up to flip it.

Tim and Billy?

Yeah, and Herc. We all got together
and we're putting money in.

Got a good deal on the house.
And we're flipping it.

Buddy Garrity's house?

Yeah, Buddy Garrity's house.

You know, we're upgrading it,
making it a lot more upscale.

Then we're gonna sell it.
I know it sounds crazy in this market nowadays,

but the thing is, we got a good
team working 24 hours a day.

We're going to make
this thing happen, and

I'm excited. We haven't hit any
snags yet or anything, so...

That's great.
Yeah.

That's great.

Listen, I gotta get going.
All right.

It's good to see you.
You should stop by the house, check it out.

Yeah, I'll do that.
It's looking real nice.

I'm sure it is.
Yeah.

All right, Coach.

You just put it right here.
You got it!

I'll just take
the whole thing.

I am a stupid, stupid girl.

You know what the worst part is?
I liked him.

Maybe there's some sort
of random explanation

and it's not really
as bad as it seems.

Julie, a woman
came to my house,

telling me that my boyfriend
owes her child support.

How much worse could that get?

She could be his sister.

I mean, theoretically,
that would be a lot worse.

That's something
Landry would say.

Tyra, three o'clock.
Turn around.

How's my lady?
Don't touch me.

Whoa, whoa.
You need to leave now.

Why? Hold on.
You need to leave, right now.

Slow down.
What's going on?

Let's just calm down here...

What the hell
am I talking about?

How about the fact that some
woman comes to my house

with a baby
that she says is yours.

My house.

Tyra, look... No, you know what?
Don't touch me.

I want you to leave right now.

You're not gonna
let me explain?

No. You know what? Here.

Why don't you give this to her
for child support, okay?

Go!

Man, this... he's good.
You got everything that you need?

Yeah. Yeah, that's good.

You good? All right,
this is gonna be fun, man.

Thanks for coming back and everything.
I appreciate it.

All right, man.
Let's do this.

Just follow him and me,

and just relax.

Let's see what you got!
All right, ready?

Thank you for coming. It's just not...
It just didn't feel right.

Did you have fun?

Yeah, man!

Hi, guys.
My name's Devin.

I'm in freshman course
right now,

and I really just wanna expand
more, like, music-wise,

so I decided I'd come
and audition today.

Well, we appreciate
you coming out, Devin.

Yeah.

All right, well, let's just give
it a shot and see what happens.

... my heart and soul
and left me here to die

Said I'm yours
This time, I'm sure

But just give me some time

She climbed out my window...

Karma stole
my heart today

Left me out to dry

Karma stole my heart today

Left me out to dry

That was...

That was pretty fun.
I felt like that was good.

I mean, she's in, right?

I think so.
That was good.

I think so.

I'm in?
You're in.

Oh, great.

Congratulations.
I think we're all set on vocals pretty much,

but we'll see what happens.

Yeah, that would be great.

Great!

Hey.

Hey, Coach.

Hey, come on in.

It's a work in progress,
as you can see.

Yeah, I can see it is.

We've progressed so far as
to take a perfectly livable house

and turn it into a place that if
a bum saw it, he would say, "No, thanks,

"I'm going back to sleep
under the bridge.' '"

So we're, you know,
getting there.

My dad used to say it always
looks bad before it gets better.

I don't think
it's gonna get better, Coach.

I think I made the biggest
mistake of my life.

The mother of my child
and my son are in the car

on the way up
to New Jersey right now,

and I decided
that the smartest thing to do

would be to buy a house
and flip it

with the Riggins brothers
and Herc,

'cause I didn't know
what else to do.

I love them both so much, and I
just don't wanna be a deadbeat dad.

I just wanna be able to provide,
you know, a little bit.

You know, some security,
something...

Anything for them, and...

Whoa, whoa.
Hey, slow down a second.

Wait a second. Whoa.

First of all, you're not
gonna be a deadbeat dad.

You need to calm down here.
Look, man, you're 20 years old.

You're not supposed to know what you're
gonna do with the rest of your life yet.

You're doing
what you think's best.

You're following through
on what you think is best,

and that's what
you should be doing.

You had a plan. You're executing it.
What's wrong with that?

But you gotta give it a chance.
You gotta give yourself time.

You can't beat yourself up because
you're taking chances on things.

But don't start giving up on what you
set forward to do in the beginning,

'cause that's gonna get you nowhere.
I can promise you that.

Yep, yep!

Hi!

Hey.

I borrowed Landry's car.

And you drove it over here...

Yeah, well...

Do you wanna go to the lake?

Yeah.

Hey, have you ever
been fired from anything?

Um, one time,
when I was 12 years old,

I babysat for the Griffins,

and I never got asked back.

Wow.

You still carry that
with you, huh?

I still carry that with me
to this day.

That's rough.
Yeah.

I don't know. I mean...

I never thought I was gonna play
professional football or anything, but...

I don't know, I kinda thought it might
help pay for college or something.

And now, it's senior year
and I'm sitting on the bench.

The bottom line, it just sucks.

Yeah, it does.

But you know
what's kind of cool?

This is the first Saturday
I can remember waking up

and not having to think about everything
I did wrong the night before.

See, that's a good thing.

Yeah, it is a good thing.

So do you feel prepared?

Prepared for what?

Prepared to get
your butt whooped by a girl?

Oh, no. Uh-uh.
That was rude.

I'm gonna get you!

Good job.

Hi, honey.
Hey!

Oh!

What is it about rice crispy
treats that are just so darn good?

I wanna tell you something.

I think you've
done a great job.

Yep, it's quite an achievement,
that's for sure.

Honey, I'm serious.

I'm proud of you.

Thank you.

'Course, I'm thinking my husband is
in the process of blowing me off,

which is not making
me very happy.

I broke up with Cash.

I'm sorry, hon.

No, you're not.

Yeah, I am.

What I didn't want to have
happen is for you to get hurt.

I'm just gonna go home.

All right. Now, just keep
in mind as you're reading these

that these are all
works in progress,

very rough.

Can I say something about these songs,
just one musician to another?

Of course.

Well, they all kind of feel like
they're one song, about one girl.

I mean, if you think about it, that's
basically the majority of all rock music

is about a girl.

But I just...
I think our band could be really great.

Yeah, so do I.

And it just kind of seems like you
need to get over this girl, then.

Is she here?

Nope, she's not.

Okay.

Footloose, here we come.

I love this kind of stuff.

Yeah?
Just feels right, you know?

Stop it.

Jeez.

Oh, there he is.
Hey, you look good tonight.

What are you doing here?

My mom thought it would be a
good idea to have some fun.

Did she?
Yeah.

And are you having fun?

Not really.

You know Lyla.

Hi, J.D.

How's it going?

You gonna cut a rug or what?

No.
No?

Um...

Tell me you don't wanna
go get a beer.

I don't wanna go
and get a beer.

No, I'm serious.
Let's go somewhere fun.

This is fun.
No, it's not fun.

You know what type of people
have fun at these dances?

The type of people that,
when they grow up,

they're gonna look back
and have regrets.

We don't wanna
have regrets. Right?

Right?
Yep.

That's why you're gonna
come for a beer.

I don't drink.
What do you mean you don't drink?

There you go, he doesn't drink.

My dad gave me an article.

It disrupts protein synthesis.
I can't...

What does?
Alcohol.

Okay, fine.
Designated driver.

No!
We're gonna get wasted.

I can't drive. I don't have a license.
I can't drive.

Or a learner's permit.

He doesn't have a license.

You're coming anyways.

Let's go. Hey, just believe
me, and trust me on this one.

Just this one time,
we're going.

I got it. We're gonna have some memories.
All right?

Pants off.
Come on.

All right, no regrets.
Let's do this.

Hey, safety first.

Let me know when you and
your date need a ride home.

Is she mad at me?

Yes, McCoy.
Let's have some fun.

Okay.

Memories tonight.

Hey, nice tie.

Tyra, it's me.
Open up.

Tyra, I know you're home.
Come on, open up.

Go to hell, Cash!

Tyra, please.
Just let me talk to you.

How about you go talk to your
girlfriend or your wife or whoever?

She's not
my girlfriend or my wife.

If you'd let me explain,
you'd know that.

Please.

Tyra, come on.

What part of "go to hell"
don't you understand?

Just hear me out, please.
Why?

Because I think I deserve
at least that much.

As far as I'm concerned, you don't
deserve anything right now.

Well, I'm sure
you don't think I do.

The girl that came here,
her name was Ally Darcy,

and that's not my baby.

I did hook up with her.
One time, five years ago.

And it's not like it
happened again, because...

You met her! She's crazy!

I shouldn't say that,
but she is crazy.

After we hooked up, she started
showing up at my work all the time,

making a scene,
so I just left town.

I was in Wyoming, doing the rodeo
circuit, and now I'm back.

And who comes knocking on my
door couple of months ago?

Ally Darcy,
with a two-year-old.

I hooked up with her
five years ago.

There's no way that kid's mine.

And if it was my kid, I
wouldn't be here lying to you,

telling you that it wasn't,
'cause I'd step up.

I'm telling you the truth.
I have no reason to be dishonest with you.

That's it?

Yes, that's it.
That's all of it.

She made me feel so awful.

I'm sure she did.
I'm sorry about that.

And you're not lying to me?

No, I'm not lying to you.

I will never lie to you.

I'm sorry.
Can you forgive me?

Hmm.

Maybe.

Hey, Tim.

How many girlfriends
do you have?

Just the one, McCoy.

God, she's so pretty.

Yeah, she's
pretty special, man.

All right, you're on
your own for a bit.

Hey, no, wait.
What am I supposed to do?

If you get in trouble, act like
you're looking for someone.

Secondly,

relax. Have some fun.
Laugh.

There's a lot of pretty girls.
Have some fun, all right?

Hey, I'm gonna steal her
for a minute, if that's cool.

She doesn't have
a choice, sorry.

There he is, Naked Gun!

Ladies and gentlemen, J.D.
McCoy, cutest buns in Dillon.

Are you getting ready
to run another midnight run?

No, no, I did my workout
earlier this morning.

Hey, J.D. man,
help yourself, bro.

Whoa! Y'all didn't know?
What?

This guy's body is a temple!

He doesn't drink sodas,
doesn't eat candy.

Definitely can't drink beer.

Your dad runs a tight little
ship, doesn't he, McCoy?

Have a drink, man.
This is a party.

All right. A beer sounds
pretty good right now.

Prove them wrong, baby.

To J.D. McCoy.
I'll drink to that!

J.D. McCoy, baby.

Oh, no, Tim!

Look at that.

Oh! I thought
you were Mr. Stackhouse.

Nope. I'm not Mr. Stackhouse.
What are you doing here?

Do you know how late it is?
Where have you been?

I've been getting dressed.
I've been shaving...

Don't just come in here and try
to slow-dance, waltz with me.

Why do you have paint in your hair?
I don't have paint...

Don't worry about why
I have paint in my hair.

No, I do worry. You know, you stood me up.
I could fire you.

You can't fire me.
You're supposed to be a chaperone.

No, you can't fire me. You'd have to go
through the board supervisor, boosters.

This, that,
and everything else.

Oh, Lord, it would be
a lot of trouble, wouldn't it?

How was your day?

How was my day? I've been sitting
here at this dance with no date.

He's here.

Veggie hot dogs are amazing.

No, I'm just gonna stick to,
you know, good old-fashioned

all-American hot dog.

Do you realize
what you're eating?

It's, like, cow eyes and
pig intestines. Mmm-hmm.

And you know what?
They taste good.

They're real good.

I think food
tastes better outside.

I would have to
agree with that.

But I'm really stuffed, and
we should probably get going.

Yeah, we probably should.

Coach. How y'all doing?

Hi, Joe, how are you?
Good to see you. Good, good.

Hey, J.D. How you doing?
Hey, Coach.

Listen, J.D. has got something
he needs to share with you.

I got really drunk last night.

I had a lot of alcohol, and I
just wanted to say I'm sorry.

A lot of alcohol.
Came home drunk.

Not so much as one
sip of wine his entire life,

three weeks
before the play-offs,

comes home drunk.

Now he knows that he has
disappointed his father.

He has let down
his coach, his team,

and I felt
that it was imperative

that he come to you
and apologize personally.

I hope you understand.

Understood.

Hey, Tim...
I was told to say that.

We gotta go
get that stove later.

So I guess when you

finish with that,
we'll go ahead... Soon.

Who's that?
Hey, Erin.

Hey, did you guys
make it there yet?

No, no, no, we still
got another day to go.

I just pulled over
to give him a little break.

I don't even know
where we are right now.

Some park somewhere.

Well, I miss you guys
like crazy.

Well, we love you, too.

We miss you, too.

Hey, put the little man on.

Am I really that boring
to talk to?

No, I just...

I just don't want my son
to forget my own voice.

He won't forget your voice.

Here he is.

It's your daddy.

Hey, Noah. Hey, little man.
It's your daddy.

Hey, I miss you.

I love you.
I love you very much.

And I wish I was there
with you today.

You know, I thought maybe we
could sing together, though.

Remember our duet?

So I'm gonna start singing, and you
just join in whenever you want, okay?

There's a
hole in my bucket

Dear Liza, Dear Liza

There's a hole in my bucket

Dear Liza, there's a hole

Now it's your turn.

You don't wanna
do the girl part today? Okay.

I'll do it.

Then fix it, dear Henry

Dear Henry, dear Henry

Then fix it, dear Henry

Dear Henry, fix it

I love you, buddy.
I'll talk to you soon, okay?