Frasier (1993–2004): Season 8, Episode 18 - Forgotten But Not Gone - full transcript

[people clapping]

THANK YOU. THANK YOU, BROTHER
REYNOLDS, FOR YOUR INAUGURAL ODE.

AND MAY I CONGRATULATE
YOU ON YOUR INGENUITY

IN RHYMING "SAUVIGNON"
WITH "TIE ONE ON."

SIR.

AND NOW, AS OUTGOING CORKMASTER,

IT IS MY PRIVILEGE TO BESTOW

THE SASH OF OFFICE UPON THE
NEWLY-ELECTED CORKMASTER

WHICH WOULD BE ME.

[people applauding]

THANK YOU, THANK YOU. THANK YOU
FOR YOUR SUPPORT. IT HUMBLES ME.



AND I ONLY HOPE TO LIVE UP TO THE
SHINING EXAMPLE OF MY PREDECESSOR.

AND, OF COURSE THE
EXAMPLE OF MY OPPONENT,

THE OTHER BROTHER CRANE,

WHO SO GRACIOUSLY CONCEDED
AFTER THAT 4TH RECOUNT.

IS HE... IS HE HERE?

I GUESS HE'S NOT. WELL, I'M
SURE HE'S WITH US IN SPIRIT.

UH, IF YOU'LL INDULGE ME,

I'VE COBBLED TOGETHER
A FEW REMARKS

TO EXPRESS WHAT THIS
MOMENT MEANS TO ME.

I THINK...

(Frasier) I'M SORRY.
DON'T START YET! OH, GOD.

OH, I'M TERRIBLY SORRY I'M LATE.

YOU KNOW, IT'S JUST COMING
DOWN IN BUCKETS OUT THERE.

HELLO, FRASIER. OH, HI.



JUST AS THE CORK
PROTECTS THE WINE,

AS CORKMASTER, I HOPE
TO PROTECT THE WINE CLUB

FROM THE FORCES OF
METAPHORICAL OXIDATION.

OH, LORD. NILES, ARE YOU IN THE
MIDDLE OF YOUR INAUGURATION SPEECH?

I'M SO SORRY. THAT'S ALL
RIGHT. THAT'S ALL RIGHT.

IT'S JUST THAT I HAVE UH, AN
ANNOUNCEMENT OF MY OWN TO MAKE.

YES, WELL, UH, NEW BUSINESS
IS CONCLUDED, BROTHER CRANE.

I MOVE THAT WE
REOPEN NEW BUSINESS.

SECOND. DENIED.

POINT OF ORDER. ONCE A MOTION HAS
BEEN SECONDED, THERE MUST BE A VOTE.

OH, ALL RIGHT, JUST TELL
US YOUR NEW BUSINESS.

TO OVERRIDE PROCEDURE,
THERE MUST BE A QUORUM.

VERY WELL. MOVE FOR A VOTE?

SECOND. ALL IN FAVOR?

(all) AYE.

MOTION CARRIED.
SECRETARY, MAKE A NOTE.

NOTED, CORKMASTER.

THANK YOU SO MUCH.

PROCEED.

I REMEMBER WHEN WE USED
TO COME HERE TO DRINK.

GO AHEAD.

CORKMASTER, MEMBERS
OF THE WINE CABINET,

ESTEEMED BROTHERS AND SISTERS.

I COME HERE TONIGHT
WITH A HEAVY HEART.

YOU SEE, I AM RESIGNING
FROM THE WINE CLUB.

WHAT?

(all) NO.

(Niles) FRASIER,

THIS WOULDN'T HAVE ANYTHING TO DO
WITH MY WINNING THE ELECTION, WOULD IT?

NO, NO, OF COURSE NOT. NILES,
I COULDN'T BE HAPPIER FOR YOU.

YOU SEE, I HAVE BEEN AFFORDED
A... A MARVELOUS OPPORTUNITY

TO PASS ON WHAT I'VE LEARNED
HERE TO... TO A MUCH LARGER AUDIENCE.

STARTING NEXT WEEK,
I WILL BE HOSTING

A NEW FEATURE ON K.A.C.L.

CALLED THE WINE CORNER

JUST AT THE END OF GIL
CHESTERTON'S RESTAURANT BEAT.

[people applauding]

THANK YOU, THANK
YOU. GOOD FOR YOU.

BUT CAN'T YOU DO BOTH?

OH, WELL, NO. REGRETTABLY, NO.

YOU SEE, LIKE THIS CAMEMBERT,

I AM AT MY MOST DELICIOUS
WHEN I'M NOT SPREAD TOO THIN.

BUT THIS ISN'T GOOD-BYE

BY ANY STRETCH
OF THE IMAGINATION.

PLEASE, I INVITE EACH AND EVERY
ONE OF YOU TO CALL INTO MY SHOW

SO THAT YOU CAN HELP ME GET SEATTLE
HOOKED ON OUR SOMETIMES WHIMSICAL,

ALWAYS ENLIGHTENED
BRAND OF DISCUSSION.

BUT... I'VE TAKEN ENOUGH
TIME AWAY FROM NILES.

AFTER ALL, THIS IS HIS NIGHT.

HE HAS BEEN ELECTED
CORKMASTER OF THIS FINE CLUB.

THANK YOU, FRASIER.

FOR A MOMENT I THOUGHT YOU WERE
SETTLING IN FOR A LONG FAREWELL SPEECH.

I'LL SECOND. ALL IN FAVOR?

(all) AYE.

WELL, IF YOU INSIST.

[chuckling]

IT WAS A SHORT 7 YEARS AGO,

ON A NIGHT VERY
MUCH LIKE THIS ONE,

A MAN HAD A DREAM.

[telephone ringing]

ALL RIGHT, ROZ, NOW, THIS IS A...
A VERY DIFFERENT KIND OF SHOW

WE'RE GOING TO BE DOING. SO,
ARE YOU CLEAR ON THE PROCEDURE?

WHAT'S SO HARD?

YOU TALK FOR A
WHILE, I SCREEN CALLS,

YOU ANSWER THEM,
I LOOK INTERESTED...

OH, I SEE THE HARD PART. HA, HA,
VERY FUNNY, YES. ALL RIGHT, NOW LISTEN.

THIS IS THE LIST OF THE
MEMBERS OF THE WINE CLUB.

IF ANY OF THESE NAMES SHOULD HAPPEN
TO CALL, PUT THEM THROUGH IMMEDIATELY,

AND THEN FASTEN YOUR SEAT BELT FOR
AN ALL-OUT, FREEWHEELING SYMPOSIUM.

[laughing] HEY, THERE'S
MY RENAISSANCE MAN.

AH, KENNY.

IF YOU CAN'T SOLVE THEIR
PROBLEMS WITH THERAPY,

SOLVE THEM WITH DRINKING.

YES, WELL, LET'S JUST KEEP
THAT OUT OF THE ADS, SHALL WE?

TOO LATE. OH!

KENNY!

AND FINALLY, NO REVIEW
OF LE PETIT OISEAU

WOULD BE COMPLETE WITHOUT
A WORD ABOUT THEIR DECOR.

HIDEOUS.

I'LL BE BACK AFTER
THESE MESSAGES.

[effeminately] AND WE'RE OUT.

HI, LANCE. HEY.

HERE'S FRASIER, AND THIS IS ROZ.

SHE'LL BE PRODUCING
THE REST OF THE SHOW.

HEY. OH, MY, ISN'T
THAT INTERESTING?

YES, WELL, FRASIER WANTS ME TO
PRODUCE HIS SEGMENT OF THE SHOW.

WE HAVE TO GET THE LEVELS JUST RIGHT
TO ACCOMMODATE THE TIMBRE OF HIS VOICE.

OOH, MY, MY, MY, ISN'T
SHE THE FUSS-POT?

ACTUALLY, IT WAS MY IDEA.

THAT'S WHO I WAS TALKING ABOUT.

LISTEN, GIL, I... I HOPE YOU DON'T
MIND MY DOING THIS SEGMENT.

OH, PERISH THE
THOUGHT. I'M ECSTATIC.

AS ECSTATIC AS YOU WOULD BE

IF SOMEONE HIJACKED THE
LAST 15 MINUTES OF YOUR SHOW.

HEY, GIL,

WHAT'S THE DEAL WITH LANCE?

OOH! SMITTEN
ALREADY, ARE WE, ROZ?

WELL, HE'S CERTAINLY
CATNIP TO THE LADIES.

NO. THAT WAS... REALLY?

WELL, THAT'S WHAT HE CLAIMS.

OF COURSE, I'VE NEVER
ACTUALLY SEEN HIM WITH A WOMAN.

WELL, JUST BETWEEN US, I'VE ALWAYS
THOUGHT HE WENT THE OTHER WAY.

WHICH WAY WOULD THAT BE?

AND WE'RE BACK!

NORMALLY AT THIS TIME, I'D
BE DOING MY FINAL SEGMENT

ON FOOD FOR THE
CALORIE CONSCIOUS:

ALL THINGS LIGHT AND EDIBLE.

BUT APPARENTLY HEALTH IS
GOING TO TAKE A BACK SEAT

TO THE RANDOM MUSINGS OF
A RADIO PSYCHIATRIST ON WINE.

SO, WITHOUT FURTHER ADO,
I GIVE YOU THE WINE CORNER

WITH YOUR HOST,
DR. FRASIER CRANE.

THANK YOU, GIL,

FOR THAT GRACIOUS INTRODUCTION.

AND HELLO TO YOU, SEATTLE.

WELCOME TO THE WINE CORNER.

I HOPE YOU'RE AS EXCITED
ABOUT THIS NEW PROGRAM AS I AM.

I OFFER MYSELF AS SHERPA,

A GUIDE, IF YOU WILL,

TO LEAD YOU THROUGH
THE LABYRINTH

OF VINTAGES AND WINE LISTS,

TO CHATEAUX AND BODEGAS

AND TAKE YOU, HOPEFULLY,

TO A WHOLE NEW LEVEL
OF SOPHISTICATION.

IN SUMMARY, LINDA,

THE YEAR LISTED ON THE BOTTLE
IS NOT AN EXPIRATION DATE.

SO, THAT WINE FROM 1997,

SHOULD BE PERFECTLY
SAFE TO DRINK.

WHO ELSE, ROZ?

WE HAVE 10 SECONDS, FRASIER.

IN THAT CASE, THIS
IS FRASIER CRANE

REMINDING YOU THAT A GREAT WINE

IS LIKE A GREAT WOMAN,

ALWAYS INTOXICATING,
EVER SURPRISING

AND ONLY GETTING
BETTER WITH AGE.

AW, DO YOU REALLY BELIEVE THAT?

OH, WHO CARES, ROZ? I STOPPED
LISTENING MYSELF 10 MINUTES AGO.

ARE YOU SURE NO ONE
FROM THE WINE CLUB CALLED?

I'M POSITIVE. DON'T FEEL BAD.

YOU GOT A LOT OF OTHER CALLERS.

IT'S JUST THAT I WAS
HOPING TO PROVOKE

THE SAME KIND OF
SPIRITED DEBATES

WE HAVE AT THE WINE CLUB.

NO-HOLDS-BARRED. FREE-FOR-ALLS

THAT'D SOMETIMES GO INTO
THE WEE HOURS OF THE NIGHT

AND EVEN... EVEN SPILL
OUT INTO THE STREETS.

OH, ROZ, WE LOVED WINE THEN.

HUZZAH, FRASIER.

I'M SURE EVERYONE
WHO WAS LISTENING

IS HITTING THE
BOTTLE AS WE SPEAK.

WELL, LANCE AND I ARE
GOING FOR A BOYS' NIGHT OUT.

LOCK UP YOUR DAUGHTERS.

[inhaling]

[muttering]

DAD.

TELL ME IF YOU THINK THIS IS TOO
SUBTLE FOR MY LISTENING AUDIENCE.

"THIS DELIGHTFUL
OFFERING IS INFUSED

"WITH THE BROODING,
ALMOST DANGEROUS PRESENCE

OF VANILLA."

HMM. NO, IT'S NOT TOO SUBTLE.

UNLESS YOU WANT THEM TO KNOW
WHAT THE HELL YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.

WHAT, YOU DON'T THINK IT'S... IT'S
CLEAR THAT I ENJOYED THE WINE?

I DON'T THINK IT'S CLEAR
YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT WINE.

[doorbell ringing]

OH, LORD, THAT'LL BE
THE NEW THERAPIST.

AH, LUCKY ME. OH, NOW,
BEHAVE YOURSELF, DAD.

IT'S ONLY TILL DAPHNE
COMES BACK. AND BESIDES,

YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IT IS
TO FIND A THERAPIST THAT CAN ALSO COOK.

HER NAME IS FREDERICA.

OH, SOUNDS GERMAN. YOU
KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS.

SHE WAS PROBABLY KICKED OFF THE
SHOT PUT TEAM FOR USING STEROIDS.

NOW, DAD, THE GERMANS NEVER
THREW ANYBODY OFF THE TEAM FOR THAT.

[laughing]

AH, HELLO. HI, I'M FREDERICA.

PLEASE, WON'T YOU COME IN?
HERE, LET... LET ME TAKE YOUR BAG.

I'M DR. FRASIER CRANE AND
THIS IS MY FATHER, MARTIN.

HERE, LET ME TAKE YOUR COAT.

PLEASURE TO MEET YOU.

LISTEN, MY FATHER'S BEEN,

WELL,

LETTING HIS
EXERCISES SLIDE A BIT.

WELL, THAT'S HUMAN
NATURE, DR. CRANE.

PEOPLE NEGLECT THEIR
EXERCISING FOR MANY REASONS.

UH, HOLIDAYS, TRAVEL,

ILLNESS, LACK OF TIME, DEATH.

AND THERE'S ONLY ONE OF
THOSE EXCUSES THAT I ACCEPT.

IT'S HOLIDAYS!

[laughing]

AH, IT'S JUST YOUR
LEG I'M PULLING.

OH, WELL, GOOD ONE.
YOU KNOW, I WAS WORRIED

THAT YOU WERE GOING TO BE ONE
OF THOSE DRILL SERGEANT TYPES.

YOU'LL SHOW ME
YOUR EXERCISE MAT.

THAT'S MY OTHER LEG
YOU'RE PULLING, HUH?

NOW!

[sighing] NOW.

[clearing throat]

AH, YES.

[inhaling]

BUT DISCERNIBLE

ONLY TO THE EDUCATED PALATE

IS THE HINT

OF VIOLETS THAT LINGERS

LIKE A HAUNTING REFRAIN.

[Martin screaming]

GOOD LORD!

OH, SHAME ON YOU, DR. CRANE.

YOU REALLY SHOULD HAVE
KEPT HIM AT HIS EXERCISES.

IS HE ALL RIGHT? NO, INDEED.

HE IS SHAMEFULLY OUT OF SHAPE.

YES, BUT I MEANT...
BUT DON'T WORRY.

I GOT HERE JUST IN TIME.

I'LL SHAPE HIM UP OR
KNOW THE REASON WHY.

[telephone ringing]

HELLO?

OH, YES, UH, THANK YOU FOR
RETURNING MY CALL, BROTHER PEABODY.

YES, WELL, I WAS JUST WONDERING,

HOW COME NONE OF THE MEMBERS
HAVE BEEN CALLING MY WINE SHOW.

NO!

WELL, JUST BECAUSE
NILES IS CORKMASTER,

IT... IT DOESN'T MEAN HE
HAS THE RIGHT T-TO DICTATE

WHOM YOU, YOU MAY
AND MAY NOT CALL.

GOOD LORD, THE MAN
IS MY OWN BROTHER!

HOW CAN SOMEONE TURN HIS
BACK ON HIS OWN FLESH AND BLOOD?

[Martin screaming]

SOMEONE ON THE PHONE HERE!

(people) AYE.

IT IS SO RESOLVED.
ANY OTHER BUSINESS?

AH. FORMER BROTHER CRANE,
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

YOU KNOW VERY WELL.

HOW DARE YOU INSTRUCT THE MEMBERS
NOT TO CALL INTO MY RADIO SHOW?

I SIMPLY DIRECTED THEIR ATTENTION
TO LAW 10-C WHICH STATES THAT

"THE CLUB SHALL NOT, THROUGH
CONTRACT OR DEED ENDORSE

(both) ANY COMMERCIAL ENDEAVOR."

YES, YES, NILES, YOU CAN HIDE BEHIND
SOME FLIMSY BYLAW IF YOU WISH TO

FOR AS LONG AS YOU LIKE, BUT WE BOTH
KNOW THE SUBTEXT BEHIND THIS PRETEXT,

VINDICTIVENESS! OH.

IN LIGHT OF THIS ABUSE OF POWER,

[gasping] I MOVE THAT THE
CORKMASTER BE STRIPPED OF HIS TITLE

AND THAT SOME MORE WELL-DESERVING
MEMBER BE NAMED IN HIS STEAD.

OH. THE MOTION FAILS
FOR LACK OF A SECOND.

SECOND. STOP THAT.

MOTION DENIED.

POINT OF ORDER. A MOTION CANNOT
BE DENIED THAT HAS BEEN SECONDED.

YES, WELL, THE CHAIR DOESN'T RECOGNIZE
MOTIONS FROM FORMER MEMBERS.

ERGO, THERE CAN BE NO SECOND
TO A MOTION THAT DOESN'T EXIST.

I MOVE WHATEVER IT
TAKES TO GET US TO THE BAR.

SECOND THAT.

ALL RIGHT, THE CHAIR DECLARES A STATE
OF EMERGENCY AND A 5-MINUTE RECESS.

[gavel banging]

FRASIER, I WANT YOU OUT OF HERE.

IT'S BAD ENOUGH YOU
UPSTAGED ME THE OTHER NIGHT.

I DID NO SUCH THING.

OH, NO.

YOU COULD HAVE PICKED ANY TIME
TO ANNOUNCE YOUR RESIGNATION

BUT YOU CHOSE MY
INAUGURATION TO DO IT.

FOR GOD SAKES, NILES, WILL YOU LISTEN
TO YOURSELF? THIS IS JUST A WINE CLUB.

JUST A WINE CLUB?

THAT'S NOT THE PLATFORM YOU
CAMPAIGNED ON 2 YEARS IN A ROW.

LOOK, YOU CAN SAY
ANYTHING YOU WANT NOW.

YOU KNOW HOW IMPORTANT
THIS PLACE IS TO ME.

YES, AND YOU KNOW HOW
IMPORTANT MY RADIO SHOW IS TO ME.

OH, WELL, I GUESS
THEN WE'RE EVEN.

SO YOU ADMIT IT.

YOU HAVE DISHONORED THIS
CLUB WITH YOUR SELFISHNESS.

YES, WELL, AT LEAST
I'M STILL IN THE CLUB.

YOU ARE A TRESPASSER.

SERGEANT-AT-ARMS!

WE CAN DO THIS THE EASY
WAY OR THE HARD WAY.

ALL RIGHT. CALL OFF
YOUR HENCHMAN.

ALL RIGHT, THANK YOU. STAND
DOWN, BROTHER HEFFLEWHITE.

I'M JUST TRYING TO SAVE
YOU FROM YOURSELF, NILES.

I SEE. WELL, GOOD-BYE,
FORMER BROTHER.

YOU TOOK THE WORDS
RIGHT OUT OF MY MOUTH.

HI, DAD.

[mumbles]

ANYTHING GOOD ON T.V. TONIGHT?

I DON'T KNOW, WHY?

OH. GOT THE NIGHT FREE.

THOUGHT WE MIGHT
HANG OUT TOGETHER.

OH, THAT'S NICE.

YOU KNOW, USUALLY I HAVE
WINE CLUB ON WEDNESDAY NIGHTS.

UH-HUH.

WHAT DO YOU USUALLY
DO WEDNESDAY NIGHTS?

OH, JUST SIT BACK, UH,

ENJOY THE SILENCE.

SOUNDS GOOD.

7:30.

I WONDER WHAT THEY'RE DOING
AT THE WINE CLUB RIGHT NOW.

OH, JEEZ. YOU GOING
TO DO THIS ALL NIGHT?

NO, NO, DAD, YOU'RE
RIGHT. I'M... I'M SORRY.

IT'S JUST THAT

I HATE TO SEE A
ONCE-PROUD INSTITUTION

MAKING SO MANY FOOLISH MISTAKES.

WELL, IF IT MAKES
YOU FEEL ANY BETTER,

THE CLUB WILL PROBABLY
FAIL WITHOUT YOU.

IT'LL BE NO FUN.

ALL THE MEMBERS WILL RESIGN.

THIS TIME NEXT MONTH, THEY'LL
PROBABLY HAVE TORN THE BUILDING DOWN.

I NEVER KNOW WHEN
YOU'RE BEING FACETIOUS.

YEAH, YOU DO.

ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT. LET'S... LET'S
JUST TALK ABOUT SOMETHING ELSE.

HOW'S YOUR PHYSICAL THERAPY?

OH,

IT WAS THE MOST PAINFUL
AFTERNOON OF MY LIFE.

SHE DID THINGS TO ME.

BAD THINGS.

WELL, DAD, I SUPPOSE WE... WE
COULD LOOK FOR ANOTHER THERAPIST.

OH, HOLD ON A SECOND. HERE.

TRY THIS.

[laughing]

MY GOD.

OH, THAT SAUERBRATEN
IS AMBROSIA.

OH, AND WAIT TILL YOU WASH IT DOWN
WITH HER PAPA'S HOMEMADE LAGER.

HOW IS EVERYTHING?
OH, GOSH, FREDERICA,

I'VE NEVER TASTED
ANYTHING SO DIVINE.

OH, YEAH, YOU SEE,
DR. CRANE, I DON'T BELIEVE

THAT FITNESS DEPENDS
ON STARVING YOURSELF.

THE SECRET IS EXERCISE,
HARD WORK, THEN GOOD FOOD,

AND LOTS OF IT WHEN
YOU'VE EARNED IT.

OH, WELL, WELL, THIS
IS FABULOUS FOOD.

YOU HAVEN'T EARNED IT!

[laughing]

THAT'S JUST MY
WAY OF HAVING FUN.

OF COURSE YOU'RE WELCOME.
I'LL GET ANOTHER PLATE.

[all laughing]

THANK YOU.

WE OUGHT TO GET NILES OVER HERE.

YOU KNOW, HE'D LOVE THIS STUFF.

NILES? DAD, I TOLD YOU NILES IS
NO LONGER WELCOME IN THIS HOUSE.

THANK YOU, FREDERICA.

OH, SON, WHY DON'T YOU JUST ASK
YOUR BROTHER TO TAKE YOU BACK?

I DID.

I CALLED HIM AND I APOLOGIZED.

HE WOULD HEAR NONE OF IT.

ALL HE DID WAS KEEP
QUOTING RULES AND BYLAWS.

GOD, IT'S JUST LIKE WHEN
YOU WERE KIDS WITH THAT FORT.

YOU WERE ALWAYS MAKING UP THESE BIG
FANCY RULES AND TITLES FOR YOURSELVES

AND ALWAYS ENDED UP IN A FIGHT.

I DIDN'T LIKE IT THEN,
AND I DON'T LIKE IT NOW.

ALL RIGHT THEN, WELL, WE
JUST WON'T TALK ABOUT IT.

BESIDES, I'M THROUGH
WITH WINE CLUB.

GOOD. WHY DON'T WE JUST
ENJOY OUR WEDNESDAY?

SECOND.

ALL IN FAVOR?

AYE.

MOTION CARRIED.

I'M DONE NOW.

MMM. MMM-HMM, MMM-HMM.

I'M GETTING OAK WITH
PLUMMY OVERTONES.

I'M GETTING SCREWED ON ALIMONY.

NILES, I WANT TO TALK TO YOU.

DAD? WHAT HAPPENED, IS
THERE SOMETHING WRONG?

YOU'RE DAMNED RIGHT THERE
IS. IT'S ABOUT YOU AND FRASIER.

GOOD GOD, YOU WEAR A SASH?

FRASIER SENT YOU
DOWN HERE, DIDN'T HE?

(Frasier) NO.

FRASIER, GET IN HERE. NOW.

DAD, THIS ISN'T NECESSARY.

YEAH. WE... WE... WE CAN TALK
ABOUT THIS SOME OTHER TIME.

ZIP IT UP, BOTH OF YOU.

I JUST GAVE UP THE BEST MEAL OF MY
LIFE TO COME DOWN HERE, SO LISTEN UP.

NILES, LET YOUR BROTHER PLAY.

DAD, THIS NOT A GAME.

THIS IS A CLUB AND
FRASIER BROKE THE RULES.

TECHNICALLY, I... ZIP IT!

WELL, THEN, YOU WRITE A NEW RULE
SO THAT FRASIER CAN COME BACK.

FIRST, I WANT AN
APOLOGY. I SAID ZIP IT.

HE DID. I HEARD HIM.

DON'T GET SMART.

NOW, ARE YOU GOING TO
LET YOUR BROTHER PLAY?

DAD... ARE YOU GOING TO
LET YOUR BROTHER PLAY?

WHY... ARE YOU GOING TO
LET YOUR BROTHER PLAY?

BUT... ARE YOU GOING TO
LET YOUR BROTHER PLAY?

FINE.

AM I GOING TO HAVE ANY MORE
TROUBLE BETWEEN YOU TWO?

(both) NO.

NO WHAT?

NO, SIR.

GOOD. NOW SHAKE HANDS.

THAT'S MORE LIKE IT.

NOW, IF YOU DON'T MIND I'VE GOT
A BIG PLATE OF GEWURZPLATZCHEN

WAITING FOR ME AT
HOME WITH MY NAME ON IT.

[clearing throat] WELL,

[chuckling] LET'S GET BACK
TO THE WINE, SHALL WE?

YOU GOT YELLED AT BY YOUR DAD.

[all laughing]

WELL, BE THAT
AS IT MAY... ZIP IT.

[all laughing]

NILES. HELLO, FRASIER.

I THOUGHT WE COULD DRIVE
OVER TO WINE CLUB TOGETHER.

ACTUALLY, I'M THINKING
ABOUT NOT GOING.

WHY NOT?

NILES, TRUTH BE TOLD,

MY ENTHUSIASM FOR THE WINE
CLUB HAS STARTED TO TURN.

I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN.

IT USED TO BE THE WINE CLUB.

NOW IT'S JUST THE
TEASING PEOPLE CLUB.

THEN, LET'S NOT GO.

BUT, THEY'LL PUT OUR
NAMES IN THE ABSENT BOTTLE.

WE'LL HAVE TO BRING
THE CRACKERS NEXT TIME.

WHAT IF THERE'S NO NEXT TIME?

WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

NILES,

THOSE PEOPLE DON'T
CARE ABOUT WINE.

NOT THE WAY YOU AND I DO, NO.

SO WHAT'S PREVENTING US FROM
STARTING A WHOLE NEW CLUB FROM SCRATCH?

WE COULD REALLY
GET BACK TO BASICS.

SOMETHING THAT'S JUST ABOUT WINE

AND A CLEAR CONSTITUTIONAL
PROCEDURE FOR ENJOYING IT.

YES. ONLY MAYBE THIS TIME THE
GOVERNING BODY COULD BE BICAMERAL.

WELL, I DON'T KNOW, NILES.
THERE IS SOMETHING TO BE SAID

FOR THE PARLIAMENTARY SYSTEM.

WELL, EITHER WAY, WE HAVE TO HAVE A
STRONG JUDICIARY TO KEEP IT IN CHECK.

GOD, I LOVE WINE.

(Frasier) ♪ HEY, BABY, I
HEAR THE BLUES A-CALLIN' ♪

♪ TOSSED SALADS
AND SCRAMBLED EGGS ♪

QUITE STYLISH.

♪ AND MAYBE I SEEM
A BIT CONFUSED ♪

♪ YEAH, MAYBE, BUT
I GOT YOU PEGGED ♪

[laughing]

♪ BUT I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO ♪

♪ WITH THOSE TOSSED
SALADS AND SCRAMBLED EGGS ♪

♪ THEY'RE CALLIN' AGAIN ♪

SCRAMBLED EGGS ALL OVER MY FACE.

WHAT IS A BOY TO DO?

GOOD NIGHT!