Franklin & Bash (2011–2014): Season 4, Episode 3 - Love Is the Drug - full transcript

As (Franklin (Breckin Meyer) and Bash (Mark-Paul Gosselaar) represent a car service driver accused of stealing his celebrity passengers handbags, an old grudge threatens Infeld's (Malcolm MacDowell) return to work.

Billables are down, but we
still came up 8% last month.

All right. New business. Let's do this.

Uh...

Lisa. Go.

- Good hands, Lisa.
- Thank you.

I'm representing a pro surfer

who came in second at the
trestles triple crown.

Winner stole his wave,

so we're going after prize
money and damages.

- Stealing a wave.
- Oh, that's just un-Californian.

Okay.



- Oh, hey. Okay?
- Oh, got to be aware.

I secured Warren Stone's
golden parachute, which...

Uh, Ed...

Would you like to remind the room
about our meeting protocol?

Nobody speaks without holding the football.

Mm-hmm. And are you currently
holding the football?

Are you?

Good one, Ed.

Really? Really? He nailed ya.

Well, I mean, he spoke first.

Two laps for you, one lap for you.

- Why am I taking two?
- You interrupted him.

Two laps, one lap. Let's go.

Okay, Ed, let's go. Come on.



Ed, get to it!

Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go!

Here it comes.

Oh!

Take a seat.

Oh! Whoa.

- Boom!
- Boom!

Oh, breakfast is served.

Oh. Stanton.

Sir.

What on earth is going on here?

Uh, we didn't know you
were coming back so soon.

Clearly.

I would apologize for my tardiness,

but somebody parked a
silver benz in my space,

so I had to get it towed.

Oh! No! No!

Why don't you take a seat here?

I wouldn't want to interfere
with your refereeing.

- Sir, we insist.
- Yeah.

Okay. Let's get back to business.

A case came in through the firm's website.

The number 4, 'cause it's shorter than...

Yes, yes, yes. I get it.

Clever.

Also, we have an Instagram
account for the firm now,

so we do Monday-morning photos.

Let's get in here.
Let's use the fingers this time.

Here we go. "We got your back."

- We'll post that on instagram and the website.
- Nice.

- You were discussing a new case?
- Uh-huh. Yep.

According to the
plaintiff, a sleep medication

triggered an illicit
late-night shopping spree.

Right. He woke up with no memory,

and now he wants to sue the
makers of the sleeping pill "Twilera"

for the purchases he cannot return.

Any takers?

Line 'em up.

Anybody?

Where's Swatello?

Uh, I think she's in deposition.

Twilera is now Ellen's case.

Now, that's it for new business.

Stanton, would you like
to address the troops?

Well, I have plenty to say,

but I'm going to share my words in private.

Oh.

Call an audible?

Meeting adjourned.

Meeting's adjourned.

Are you mad at us, sir?

Yeah, you didn't seem your
meta self in that meeting.

Listen, boys. In the past,

I haven't ruled with an iron fist,

but you can't run a respectable firm

with pizza parties and skateboarders

and what you Americans call football.

Well, it's worked out pretty well so far.

Well, if we're to get to the top again,

we'll have to refine your approach.

Okay. Well, I mean, we could go to
Larsen's for lunch, talk it over.

Yeah, we got a 20% Groupon.
Let us take you to lunch.

- One of us has to get that branzino.
- Peter's afraid of fish.

I'm not afraid of fish. I just
don't like the way they serve it.

- They serve it whole...
- You're afraid of fish.

With the head still on there,
fried, looking up at you.

- Right, you're afraid of that.
- How you supposed to eat a fish

- when it's looking at you?
- You're just afraid of fish. Admit it!

All right, enough!

You don't like watching
"The Little Mermaid." You...

Maybe we'll have lunch tomorrow,
but in the meantime,

I have thousands of e-mails to catch up on.

Dan-o.

- Dan-o?
- Yeah, we like to give

nicknames to all our private investigators.

I prefer the nickname I already have.

Oh, yeah? What is it?

I-I can't tell you.

It's the same as my wi-fi password.

Seems totally normal. What
do you got for us, Dan-o?

Some guy in reception says he knows you...

Jimmy Livanos, Wunder driver?

Doesn't ring a bell, but
we do love the Wunder app.

Can't get home from a bar without it.

Really looking forward to when
they invent the Wunder jet pack.

He says he was arrested

for conspiring to steal a bunch
of handbags from celebrities

with his passenger.

I'm gonna go out on a limb here

and presume he sees things differently?

Rhetorical question. Let it go.

All right.

It's just a misunderstanding.

I drove a passenger to an
art gallery opening at H58,

then to a denim store launch in X4,

and then to a charity event for
endangered city squirrels at G21.

I dropped her off, and
the next thing you know,

my car's surrounded by cops
with their guns drawn.

Uh, H58, GX...

Did you sink a battleship
at some point in the night?

Sorry. They're coordinates
in the "Harris Road Atlas."

Okay. Oh. Well, it seems like a lot of work

your phone could do for free.

Yeah, but your phone's GPS does not have

the Jimmy Livanos shortcuts.

I've got a photographic
memory for directions.

Well, Jimmy, the bouncer at the chateau

took down your license plate

after Gwyneth Paltrow's purse went missing,

and surveillance cameras got
you and your passenger leaving

with the bag.

Not to mention 70 grand of top-shelf bags

disappeared from the other
places you guys visited.

No, we didn't steal any bags.

Talk to my passenger, Kim
Polito. She'll tell you.

This is crazy.

Yeah. Uh, well, that's not gonna be so easy.

Kim Polito doesn't exist, Jimmy.

We pulled the police report.
She used a fake PayPal account.

And the D.A. thinks that you
two planned the thefts together.

She set me up?

That doesn't make sense.

She sat up front and bought me cheese fries.

We were vibing each other.

Well, I would keep the vibing to yourself.

Prosecution will only use it to bolster

their co-conspirator theory.

You're looking at 10 years for grand theft.

Prison? No, I-I just bought a house,

and I'm on track to be
promoted to Wunder S.U.V.

I-I can't... listen.

When I drove you guys home a few weeks ago,

you swore to me you'd get my
back if I ever was in trouble.

You picked us up from a bar?

Yeah.

We leave you a good tip?

Just your business card. And
you puked in my back seat.

Well, Jared can't hold his liquor,

but we are good at keeping our word.

You both puked.

That's why we're gonna fight
twice as hard for your case.

Ha. You puked, too.

So, the plaintiff
was so out of his mind

on the sleep med Twilera that
he ordered up a dominatrix.

Of course he did.

And when fantasia arrived,
he tried to call it off,

but he was so loopy that he
couldn't remember the safe word.

She tied him up,

poured wax down his crack,

and billed him for services rendered.

And you guys want me to go after Twilera

because the dominatrix...

Fantasia.

won't provide a refund?

Think of this... it's your first
shot at big pharma.

Are you two high on sleep meds right now?

I know I'm not sleeping, 'cause if I was,

you wouldn't be so far away
and wearing so much.

Uh-oh.

All right, we'll just make a record of that.

I was kidding, 'cause, you know,
we're sleeping together.

Dude?

All right. Tuesday, June 22nd.
Peter, do you have the time?

- I do.
- Don't give her the time.

- I'm sorry.
- Yes. You are.

And I didn't join this firm to
defend potheads and perverts.

Give it to Anita.

Ellen, Ellen,

when you're running a law firm...

Kind of the bosses.

Sometimes, you have to make the tough calls,

like matching the perfect
lawyer to the perfect case.

And this case has
Swatello written all over it.

"Swatello."

You guys already decided I'm
taking the case, didn't you?

- Yeah, he's your 12:00.
- He should be here now.

- The underwear model?
- No, his name's Bob Allen.

He's not an underwear model. He's a...

Masseuse.

Ouch.

Oh, yeah. This guy definitely
deserves his day in court.

Thank you.

How are you?

Well, hello. I'm Ellen Swatello.

Shut up.

The people vs. Jimmy Livanos.

Mr. Everett, it's the court's understanding

you have new evidence you
would like to present to trial.

Your Honor, we have an affidavit

from a security guard at the Raw Denim event

who witnessed Mr. Livanos
socializing with his passenger.

Socializing? Well, let's just skip the trial

and lock him up right now.

Your Honor, we admitted
our client was invited inside

so he wouldn't have to wait in the car.

They were dancing together.

Well, he had to stretch his
legs after a long car ride.

Our client has a six-star rating at Wunder.

He was Driver of the Year three times.

And, Your Honor, he has no priors,

and on Yelp, his passengers have
labeled him Siri's big brother

because he has an amazing
memory for directions.

Then maybe counsel can explain
why Wunder's GPS software

tracked Mr. Livanos'
vehicle to a parking lot

across from a closed pawn shop.

'Cause it looks like he
and his co-conspirator

were trying to fence the items they stole.

I-I got turned around.

After we just said your
brain was Siri's big brother?

I'm deeming the evidence

concerning Mr. Livanos' driving
that evening admissible.

The jury will be instructed to consider it

in determining Mr. Livanos' guilt.

Say goodbye to a plea deal.

We're coming after you with both barrels.

What just happened?

20-car pileup.

Come on, Jimmy. What's going on?

I just got my wires crossed that night.

I made a wrong turn and
pulled over in a parking lot.

Right in front of a diamond
brothers pawn shop?

Yeah, also in front of Burger Shack.

Yeah, but drivers with photographic memories

for directions don't get lost.

Okay, Jimmy, what's the quickest way

to get from Antelope Valley to L.A.X.?

Uh, 14 south to the 5 south to the 405,

exit La Tijera, shoot down Manchester

to Century, and you're there.

Is he right?

The hell do I know? I've
never been to Antelope Valley.

U-unless it's rush hour,

in which case, I'd take the 101 to
Highland, to La Brea, to La Tijera...

Okay, so how did your wires get crossed?

I wish I knew.

The whole night's a blur. It's weird.

It was a blur? Did she slip
something in your drink?

No, I don't drink on my shifts.

Wait. So, you're saying you danced sober?

Yeah, she was cool.

Why would she do this to me?

Jimmy, was this girl hot?

Uh, she's not unattractive.
But I'm a trained professional.

I would consider that a lame excuse.

Mm-hmm. So would a judge.

No. Then we're gonna have
to find your mystery girl,

get her to tell the truth.

What are you doing?

Nothing. Just... looking at texts.

Yeah? Checking in on Swatello?

Worried about Bob?

- He's not her type.
- Oh, yeah,

'cause she couldn't
possibly be interested in

a fitness freak who gives
happy endings for a living.

I'm not gonna let you get in
my head. I'm not gonna do it.

Hey, Dan-o. You want a beer?

I'm working.

Sure.

What'd the Danimal drag in?

Great, now I have to
change all my passwords.

How did you crack it?

Mm-hmm.

Uh... here's something on our mystery girl.

I figured someone got
her into those parties,

and if it was someone famous,

paparazzi would've caught
them together, right?

- Okay.
- Yeah, we're following you.

That's smart, man. Link her to a celeb

who might know the mystery girl's name.

Capturebank gathers

every red-carpet nip slip
and crotch shot by event.

Already bookmarked. Good man.

Here she is...

At the Raw Denim launch.

And...

Save the Squirrels fundraiser.

- Both with Jimmy.
- No celebs.

No crotch shots, either.

But...

Look closer.

What... is it some special
face-recognition software?

No. The pics...

are watermarked.

"Flywire Photos."

A division of Raglan Public Relations...

Same company that
dispatched the photographers

to both events.

One of the photographers
would recognize a familiar face.

Mm-hmm.

Okay. I'll get into it.

Hey, Dan, you, uh...

You been looking for a place to live, right?

Why?

Well, we got a room if you're interested.

It's downstairs, right by...

The door to the beach.

Thanks. I've been living
here for a week now.

- He's gonna kill us.
- I'm gonna lock my door.

- You got a minute?
- No.

- You were right.
- Of course I was.

About what?

Anita's a better fit for the Twilera case.

Hmm. Is she?

Yeah. You know, someone with your drive,

you should really be focused
on making real rain here.

Mm, that's sweet of you to say,

but actually, the Twilera
case has turned out to be

a potential monsoon.

Even your old buddy Karp
wants a piece of it.

He put a call in to Bob.

Karp wants a piece of all our cases.

Also, Bob's physician at
Westside General contacted me.

Turns out, Twilera has
elicited bizarre behavior

in a number of his patients.

Class-action suit?

6 grand just turned into $6 million.

Well, even still, I mean, a case that size

is gonna suck up all of
our firm's resources.

I-I really think we should
explore a settlement.

We had sex in the Ripley's
Believe It Or Not Museum.

Since when do you play it safe?

You gonna put
that in your harassment log?

Look, Bob's toxicology came back

with traces of
benzodiazepines in his system.

The defense is gonna
paint him as a pill popper.

You're jealous of Bob.

Of... of Bob?

I'm not... I'm not jealous of Bob.

I am looking out for the firm's well being.

So am I. That thing you're playing with

is on loan to us from Bob's doctor.

It detects drugs in the body by
measuring pupil reaction times.

And we discovered that
Twilera's peculiar effects on Bob

linger for almost 14
hours after consumption.

And it detected Levipro...

A benzodiazepine.

He was prescribed it for his
torn rotator cuff from Fantasia.

Sounds like Bob's got a weak shoulder.

I brought cronuts.

Hi. Half croissant, half doughnut.

Oh, wow, that is so thoughtful of you, Bob.

Oh, that is really sweet.

- Please, help yourselves.
- Ohh.

Aw, uh, no, thanks. I don't
like hybrid, freakish food.

It's like, you know,
are you a doughnut or a croissant?

You know, just decide.
Just make up your mind.

You just have to pick one.

Oh! I can still smell
old cavendish in the air.

Remember when a bog-wood
pipe came with dessert?

- Times have changed.
- Ah.

Isn't... Stanton, isn't that your table?

Yeah, where you shared
biggie smalls' last supper.

Dominic, um, I do believe we've
overshot the green, there.

Hmm. Someone who's fallen
as far from grace as you

certainly doesn't need any
more unwanted attention.

Gentlemen, here we are.

So close to the bathrooms.

Pretty sure I can hit the urinals from here.

You know, this is Stanton Infeld.

- Show some respect.
- It's... it's all right.

This table, it's fine. It's great, lovely.

At least from here, I can see my carica...

Wha...

My caricature has been replaced by...

Mike Tyson?

Hmm. You're the first to notice.

You know, keep this up, we're not gonna be
greasing your palms during the holidays.

What will I do without my
re-gifted Starbucks card?

Let me guess... using a Groupon today?

Look, direct your insults at me,

or just refuse us service

if you think we sully your establishment.

I'm surprised it took you
this long to take the hint.

You son of a bitch!

Message received.

Just so we're clear, when we said

"go to lunch to discuss our approach,"

we didn't mean decking the owner.

Not that that punch was not awesome.

Oh, wow. What a right hand, man.

But we are on the verge

of pulling the firm out of a nosedive.

And that might've erased
all of our progress.

I-I don't know what came over me, boys.

You know, and it's certainly not
about that toffee-nosed Dominic.

I-it's more about me.

Hang on.

Thank you.

You know, my image has
damaged the firm's name.

It's a bit overwhelming.

- Stanton, your image is fine.
- With your image,

we had 641 people testifying
to your love-making skills.

Broadcasting my sexcapades in court

also came at the expense
of the dignity of the firm,

and then the pressures
that I wasn't aware of,

they started to build up, and I...

Snapped.

Snapped, yes.

Now, uh, listen. I-I'm
not proud of my actions,

but I do take responsibility for them.

Whoa.

You sucker punched the wrong guy.

And you insulted my lawyers.

You shouldn't have stolen Madeline.

Madeline?

Madeline?

Come on, man. That's 20 years ago!

And for 20 years, my position
at this establishment

has kept me from speaking
my mind to a valued patron.

Well, the tables have turned.

I want $100,000, or I'm
going straight to the police.

What... are you mad?

You have 24 hours.

You...

If he goes to the cops, that could affect

your reinstatement with the bar.

Not to mention get arrested.

You know, I spent three years in a Gulag

pushing a stone wheel on the Kolyma River.

Prison, I can survive. But my dignity...

Well, Stanton, we can't just flip a cushion

and find a spare $100,000.

You know, Sotheby's has been after

my scrimshaw walrus penis
from John Lennon for years!

- We, um...
- We sort of hocked that...

What?

To cover your last round of legal expenses.

Yeah.

Don't tell me we're out of options.

- Peter.
- Shh. Shh.

Peter?

Shh.

Quick question...

Bra or no bra?

Are you talking to us?

And can you repeat it and say it slower?

I'm on the fence about
a bra with this dress.

And... and you want
our... our... our advice?

I want your queer eye.

- Here, take a pic.
- Yeah.

- Yeah.
- Use the flash.

That's good.

Tell me you can't see my nipples.

Ooh. We'd be lying.

Tell you what. Let's get a second opinion

and use my phone. Good idea.

Stronger flash, yeah.
You must be the lawyers.

There we go. Perfect.

Peter Bash, Jared Franklin.

Esquires. You don't have to go.

Tenley Lark. I coordinate
firefly from Raglan.

You called about speaking
with our photographers?

Yes, trying to figure out
if one of your photographers

crossed paths with this woman right here.

- Sadie Juvonen.
- You know her?

She was in charge of gifting for Raglan.

We give select celebs and influencers

free dresses and accessories
from our designers.

Now, you said Sadie was
in charge of gifting?

We let her go a month ago.

It takes a unique personality
to tolerate the fashion world.

You wouldn't happen
to have her address, would you?

Is she in trouble?

No. No, no, no. No.

She, uh, did some personal
shopping for one of our clients.

We're handling the returns.

Turnover is fairly high here.
My assistant may know more.

Okay.

So, Sadie knew who got the
bags and where to find them.

Yeah, pinned it on Jimmy

and turned her unemployment
into an early retirement.

She's crashing on a
friend's couch in Weho.

Oh, great.

Excuse me. I have to take this.

Sure. Thank you.

I am such a pain in the ass.

Could I borrow one of you guys again

for a private opinion in my dressing room?

- I'm all yours.
- I'm at your service.

Come on. I...

Just...

Yeah.

Oh.

Whoa! Whoa! Swatello!

- You look...
- You can say it.

"Hot."

I'm trying to bait Bob
into a dinner at the grill.

Oh. You sure that's it?

What else would I be trying to do?

Oh, I don't know. Just trying to make

a certain friend of ours jealous?

I would only be trying to make
someone jealous if I liked them.

Which you don't.

Actually, I don't.

- You paused.
- And now I'm leaving.

All right. Ellen, the firm's
really not in a position

to splurge on client dinners.

Okay, but Karp just invited Bob to play

in a scramble at Sawbridge.

All right, fine. Just
don't order any appetizers.

I'm ordering calamari.

- No.
- Yep.

- No!
- Happening.

I've been sensing sexual tension
between you and Miss Swatello.

You mean you've been reading my texts?

How I sense it is irrelevant.
What is relevant

is her blossoming relationship with Bob.

You know something I don't?

Always, but I could find out more.

You're not seriously offering
to spy on a colleague?

I'm offering to find out for my roomie

if Ellen and Bob are boning.

No. No, no, no. That's
totally unprofessional.

I'd keep it professional.

- I'm not saying that.
- And I'm not hearing you.

Wait. What did we just agree to?

D-Dan!

Hi. Infeld-Daniels, Franklin & bash.

Uh, my roommate already told the
landlord her dad sent the rent.

We're here to talk to you about
the handbags you stole, Sadie.

Uh... My name's Emma.

You guys must have the wrong address.

Oh, my God. S-sorry to bother you.

- Yeah, we'll just wait out here for the cops.
- Yeah.

Okay, why should I talk to you guys?

Because we just called the cops,

and in about 60 seconds,
you're gonna need a lawyer.

And we're running a one-day-only
unemployment special.

We'll represent you pro bono
in exchange for your testimony.

You just tell the cops that Jimmy Livanos

had nothing to do with those purses.

40 seconds.

We're in tight with the D.A.
we can get you a good deal.

- 35.
- I can't go to jail.

Well, there's an innocent man

who's about to go behind bars
'cause of something you did.

- You guys can really help me?
- 20 seconds.

- Oh.
- Oh.

Never mind. They're here.

Sadie Juvonen.

Oh, thank God you're here.

Jimmy Livanos made me rob those women.

I didn't want to do it.

She's good.

She's lying.

She's saying you were
in on it from the beginning

and that you were in charge.

How could I be such an idiot?!

The good news is her
testimony won't come in.

Why not? Well, statements

from one co-defendant against
another are inadmissible.

You both have inherent reason to
point the finger at each other.

I mean, how could somebody
so beautiful be so evil?

In my experience, sometimes
the two go hand in hand.

You know, I-I-I could've
been a cab driver...

Throw the meter on, keep to myself.

But I joined Wunder
because, you know, it's about

more than just the ride. You share your car!

You share your life!

Sadie's gonna take all that away from me.

- We won't let her.
- Once we put you on the stand,

the jury's gonna learn
what we already know...

A good guy's really big heart
got him in really big trouble.

Well, your nose has healed up nicely.

I wish I could say the same
thing about your reputation.

We have a counteroffer I think
you'll find acceptable, Dominic.

What does this mean?

You threatened to go to the
police if we didn't pay you.

Last time I checked, extortion is illegal.

So is assault.

And around we'll go.

We'd rather let bygones be bygones.

The truth is, Dominic, you
caught me on a bad day.

Your insults ignited my pent-up emotions.

Oh, thanks to you, I've worked them out.

Only now, with your ego on the
ropes, do you show any remorse

for your arrogant behavior over the years.

Look, you shouldn't have
taken down my caricature.

And you shouldn't have taken Madeline
from me at the Concours D'elegance.

Her engine was a true masterpiece.

This is over a car?

You don't call a 1961 Jaguar E-type "a car."

You can say that again, Dominic.

You outbid me in front of everyone

after I told you that I wanted her!

Come on. We were both half
in the bag on Sazerac.

- You said no such thing.
- You calling me a liar?

I'm calling you a crazy old loon
who was too drunk to remember.

20 years ago, we would've
settled this like men.

Well, men don't go whining
to the authorities, old boy.

And only candy asses throw sucker punches!

All right.

Come on. Give me your best shot. Go on.

Punch me on the chin, and I hope it feels

as good for you as it did for me.

With pleasure.

Ah, no. Come on.

Take your corners.

Peter, this has to happen.

Please, let's just settle
this once and for all.

One free punch, and you're even?

You're good with this?

Okay. Not here.

We already had too many
witnesses at the restaurant.

It's not good for the firm.
It's got to be on the down-low.

Agreed?

Agreed.

So, can Larsen wear any
rings on his punching fist?

Oh, he would, wouldn't he?

We should put a no-jewelry
proviso in the contract

just to cover ourselves. Yeah.

D-train is in the station.

- Are you having a stroke?
- I'm speaking in code.

We're ignoring you in English.

I have information about Ellen.

Swatello?

Uh, no. It's... it's nothing.
Shh. We'll talk about it later.

-We'll talk about it later.
- She and Bob

ordered a calamari appetizer.
Seafood... panty dropper.

You put Dan on Swatello?

I didn't put Dan on anyone.

- He accepted my wink.
- He gave you a wink?

Uh... people wink. It's a thing.
I didn't accept a wi...

I also went through Bob's car
at the valet and found these.

What is that?

Jacoby & Dunhill, Simmons & Associates,

Randall-Kosch.

And a parking stub...

From Gibson & Marshall's building.

So Karp's not alone. Bob's gonna walk.

Not if we get out in front of him.

Aah!

Ohh, yeah!

Harder! Harder!

- Oh, sweet...
- Ohh, yeah!

Uh, Stanton?

Oh. Oh.

Excuse us, but, uh, we have
a favor to ask you, sir.

Oh. Well, I'll trade you.

We need you to lob a call in to Bob Allen.

The plaintiff in the Twilera case.

He needs to know that his case has
the support of the firm's emperor.

Very well. Show a little
love to Bob Allen. Will do.

Good. Great. Uh, what's yours?

Well, in order to prepare
for my settlement punch,

I need you to pummel me
when I least expect it...

Face, kidneys, your choice.

Nothing toughens a man quite
like the element of surprise.

Oh!

Hmm.

Good?

Ellen, our street intel
suggests that the Twilera case

might be more substantial than we predicted.

It seems that every triple-name
firm in town is going after Bob.

We can't let them poach him.

Those firms wine and dine
with expense accounts

twice the size of our payroll.

Well, we're gonna need you to do
whatever it takes to land him.

Okay. I'll get it done.

Ow!

That's not a toy.

Well, you just gave her the
green light to bang Bob.

What are you talking about?

"Whatever it takes to land him"?

Yeah, whatever it takes for her to...

- I didn't mean it like that.
- Wow.

No, I didn't mean it like that!

Look, Jimmy, when Sadie comes
in, you have to play it cool.

Trust me, I'd never give
her the satisfaction.

Attaboy. We're gonna get
you through this, Jimmy.

Speak of the devil.

What's she doing with the D.A.?

Hey, Jimbo.

Hey. Did you, uh, get that
childish gambino album

- we talked about?
- It's beyond.

Right? She's the enemy.

Whoa, eyes on the prize.

- Doesn't she smell incredible?
- She smells like 10 years.

My dance card's full today,
boys and girls. Let's get to it.

Your Honor, we move to exclude
the testimony of Sadie Juvonen

as a co-defendant.

- I object to that motion.
- You shouldn't.

Miss Juvonen cut a deal with
my office earlier this morning

to turn state's evidence.

- She pled guilty.
- Does that matter?

Yeah. Now she can say whatever
she wants on the stand.

We are in recess until 9:00 A.M. tomorrow.

Hmm.

Uh, do you guys think I
still have a shot with her?

Okay.

We have to prove that you
weren't partners in crime.

Yeah, and flirting with the person

that we're trying to paint as the villain

- sends a mixed message.
- I-I can't explain it.

I just saw her, and all
these feelings returned.

You guys smell that?

Stripper perfume?

Pink sapphire.

We said the judge might not buy

our client being distracted by Sadie.

What if he was drugged?

No, no, I told you. She
didn't slip me anything.

Oh, yeah, she did. You
just weren't aware of it.

Hey, dude, we still have
another fight on our hands.

They changed the proximity clause.

- What?
- Check it out.

All right. Our ducks in a row?

Yeah, remember we went
over the original language...

The face, stomach, balls.

We ironed all this out yesterday.

You know, to keep it fair, I would ask you

just to punch me directly in the face.

My team made some changes.

I wasn't afforded that luxury
when you sucker punched me.

Besides, everyone knows you
only have one testicle, Stanton.

All right, enough dilly dallying.

- Let's just sign this thing and move on.
- Okeydoke.

- Here you go.
- Where do I sign?

- Here.
- Okay.

There we go.

Remember, keep your arms at your side and...

Yeah, just keep your arms at your side.

All right. Uh...

Uh, bring on the pain.

Gladly.

Whoa! Whoa!

I'm hereby invoking my
right to a substitute hitter.

Tha... that's... that's
Iron Mike Tyson right there.

Oh, my God. Jared Franklin. Huge fan.

We're huge fans from way back.

Thank you. Really appreciate that.

Oh, my God. "Mike Tyson's punch-out!!"

On Nintendo... we played every
afternoon. Glass Joe, piston...

- Hell of a game.
- Hell of a game!

Oh, my God. Amazing game.

He does a spot-on impression
of you. You got to hear this.

No, I don't.

- You should do it for him.
- You should shut up.

- Get out of here.
- He'd love it.

Shut your face. Come on.

- I would like to hear it, yeah.
- Really?

- He would like to hear it.
- All right, um...

Everyone has a plan

u-until they get punched in the mouth.

Not bad. Most people make
me sound like Jay Leno.

- He's good, right?
- Really good.

Thank you very much.

I got to say, your fight
against Buster Douglas...

- Oh, man.
- W-w-w-what was that?

- You took him to the mat.
- The ref gave him forever

- to get back up.
- I try to tell everybody.

Man, Buster was so lucky that night.

- So lucky.
- Never gave me a rematch, either.

Boys! Listen.

He's here to destroy me!

That's kind of true.
I am here to kick his ass.

Okay. We did not approve the
baddest man on the planet.

Iron Mike is going to cripple Stanton.

Strong possibility, yeah. Never walk again.

Our contract does not clarify
who delivers the punch.

Oh, you are a regular John Wilkes,

aren't you, Dominic? A stabber in the dark.

A cowardly, malignant...

Oh!

- What the...
- Oh!

- Hey, man. That's not cool, dude.
- That's not cool, dude!

- I'm sorry, Mike.
- Really?

- No, I didn't mean...
- Really, huh?

- What are you doing, man?
- Mike, that was a...

- Why did you do that?
- I didn't tell it to do anything.

You hit my friend.

Well, I did this as a
favor for a friend, man.

I didn't expect all this stuff.

I'm sorry, Mike. I'm sorry.

Man, I don't need this. I do theater now.

Uh, Mi...

I'm sorry. I loved your show, Mike!

- Where were you?
- What are you doing?

What are you doing? You...

I think my...
diaphragm just exploded.

- You think we can still get a picture?
- Yeah.

I was gonna get a picture.

The defense calls Dr. Anthony Garth,

a toxicologist from the Claremont institute.

Objection. Dr. Garth is
not on our witness list.

He was a last-minute addition, Your Honor.

We submitted to prosecution late last night.

If you couldn't tell, gentlemen,
I also don't like surprises.

Why should I make an exception?

Well, due to Jimmy's
keen sense of direction,

the prosecution finds it
implausible that he accidentally

drove to the parking lot
across from the pawn shop.

And Dr. Garth will help us argue

that Jimmy lost his sense of direction

because he was drugged.

Which is why he got turned around.

Objection. The police report
does not establish any evidence

of drug-related behavior.

Then you have nothing to
lose by allowing our witness.

I'll allow it.

Thank you, Your Honor.

Dr. Garth, isn't it possible that
a person could be drugged

without exhibiting drug-related behavior?

Intoxicating effects present
themselves in a myriad of ways.

Could you educate the court on
the device that I'm holding?

An ocular intoximeter is used
by law-enforcement agencies

to detect drugs in the blood system.

Sort of like a breathalyzer for booze.

More or less.

With the court's permission,

could you give a
demonstration on our client?

It's currently measuring
pupil reaction times.

Processing the data.

Subject's system is drug free.

Great. Thank you.

No further questions.

Mr. Everett.

Inasmuch as none of this has
any relevance to the case,

the people have no questions.

Thank you, Dr. Garth.

Your Honor, the defense calls
Jimmy Livanos to the stand.

Jimmy, you've been called Siri's big brother

because of your photographic
memory for directions.

I-I know my way around town.

And you're also knowledgeable
with the "Harris Road Atlas."

Yeah, like the back my hand.

The back of your hand.

Let's put him to the test.

Jimmy, where is the Los Feliz Fountain?

Uh, page 56, L72.

56, L72...

He's right.

How about the Long Beach Aquarium,

the Getty Center, and Griffith Observatory?

Uh, page 191, L96,

page 55, K5, and page 203, W55.

He's too fast.

Objection. I need a GPS

to figure out this line of questioning.

Your Honor, the relevance
will be clear in a moment.

Overruled, barely. But this
better get relevant real quick.

I'll do my best, Your Honor.

Jimmy, can you tell me
what's on page 48, T82?

That's where I got turned
around that night with Sadie.

Outside of Diamond Brother's pawn shop?

Hmm.

No further questions, Your Honor.

The defense would like to recall
Sadie Juvonen to the stand.

Mr. Livanos?

You may step down.

Uh, ha-hang on a sec.
Miss Juvonen, stay on deck.

I have one more question for Jimmy.

Jimmy, you just told us
what's on page 48, T82.

Tell us what's on page 48, T83.

Uh... um...

T83?

T83.

Come on, Jimmy, don't let down
all your disciples on Yelp.

Uh, page 48. Uh...

8... I-I don't know.

Your Honor, I'd like to have
Dr. Garth retest Jimmy's pupils

with Sadie Juvonen remaining in court.

Jimmy.

What's up, doc?

Nothing?

He has the same dilation
as someone high on opiates.

And the only thing that's
changed since Jimmy's last test

is the presence of Sadie Juvonen.

Best ill-fated love outlaw movie?

"True Romance."

Slater. That's strong, but it's
not as strong as "Heathers."

That's a good one.

Hey. How'd you make out with Bob?

Ow! Ow!

Stop it!

Aah!

Hi, Ellen. Take a shot?

Bob caught Dan going through his trash.

There was a confrontation, and
then Bob went with Karp's firm.

You were supposed to pull Dan back.

Wait a second. You guys
knew he was snooping?

It was a winking miscommunication.

No, Jared just wanted to know
if you were hooking up with Bob.

You probably don't realize
this, but exposing this firm

ethically and criminally is just plain...

Stupid. I know.

And in this case...

Lucky.

Bob's a fraud.

He's drumming up bogus cases

with his physician at Westside General.

Dan found shredded documents confirming it.

So, it's a good thing I activated him.

You're an idiot.

But an adorable one, right?

No. Just an idiot.

I can't.

I think you're adorable.

Thanks, buddy. Right back at ya.

Should we tip off Karp about Bob?

- Nah.
- Nah.

So, ladies and gentlemen,
this case isn't about intention.

Jimmy Livanos never intended

to assist his passenger in a crime spree.

He simply fell for what Huey Lewis called

"the power of love."

Remember that song? I mean, look at history.

Men have had their minds blown by women

since Eve took a bite out of Adam's apple.

Van Gogh cut off his own ear over a woman.

Tiger Woods has been in a majors
drought for years over a woman.

Or two.

My own partner, Jared Franklin,

nearly cost us a seven-figure
case over a woman.

Jimmy Livanos

didn't intentionally drive to a pawn shop.

His GPS brain glitched, and
he drove to the wrong grid.

Why? Because he was high on
a drug called Sadie Juvonen.

If he's guilty of anything,

it's getting lost...

Lost in love.

It might make him a fool,

but it doesn't make him
guilty of these crimes.

Thank you.

I don't
know how to repay you guys.

Think of it as payback for us
throwing up in your back seat.

I don't just mean for
saving my ass back there.

I mean for opening my eyes.
That Sadie chick nearly ruined me.

- Won't be the last.
- Wow.

Speaking of sore losers.

Come on. You got to be used to it by now.

Come on. We didn't mean
to beat you that bad.

Hey, uh, is she in trouble?

- Oh, yeah.
- Oh, yeah.

But I, uh... I thought she had a deal.

Uh, she didn't give truthful testimony,

so that deal's off the table.

She's got to go down all by herself.

Sadie, um...

When this is all, uh, done for you, uh,

just click your Wunder app,
and I'll be there to pick you up.

Thanks, Jimmy.

Hey, for what it's worth, I
had a great night with you.

Yeah.

Oh, Jimmy.

Oh, that poor guy.

Mmm. These really are delicious!

Told you.

- What do you call them again?
- Buffalo wings.

Mmm. Buffalo.

Mmm. Well, it's chicken.

Well, whatever they are, they're delicious.

Oh, by the way, I commend you
on your choice of power table.

You can really control the
whole room from here.

Sir...

We got you a welcome-back gift.

Oh. For me?

- Yep.
- Oh, you're too kind.

- Can I open it now?
- Of course.

Oh. Oh, no.

Oh. Ohh.

- You like it?
- Wow.

Doesn't it strike you as being
a liitle bit over the top?

- No, it's perfect.
- Practically a photograph.

- Yeah.
- Wow.

We, uh... we got a spot
over here for you.

- Oh. Where is it?
- Starting a wall of fame right there.

- You are the first.
- Oh! Thank you.

- What do you think?
- It's lovely. Thank you very much.

I appreciate that.

Well,
it's good to be back.

It's good to have you back.

Looks like an unconventional approach
can get you back to the top.

Yeah, in moderation.

- To Infeld.
- Daniels. Franklin & Bash.