Framed! A Sicilian Murder Mystery (2022–…): Season 1, Episode 4 - Episode #1.4 - full transcript
Here she is!
Here she is, coming out!
We can see her right now.
Let's hear what
our new deputy police chief has to say.
- Ms. Scalia, please go ahead.
- Agata!
- There isn't much we can say.
- Ah. So you're friends with the cops?
I can only say that,
to the public,
Gambino appeared
to be a respectable accountant.
He was working with the Mafia.
That's the lady
who came all the way from Milan
just so she could wage war on the Mafia.
That's enough.
Let's get it over with, huh?
That's enough.
However, Gambino had recently chosen
to cooperate with the law.
It was thanks to his statement
that we've been able to make
countless arrests over the past few days.
He would've been placed
in witness protection soon,
but unfortunately, someone decided
to silence him first.
We're examining all movement
at the murder scene.
and we're hoping that we will be able
to bring the perpetrators to justice soon.
Thank you so much
for giving us your time.
So for the time being,
that's all we have to report on.
And now, back to you at the station.
The Holy Father has spoken.
He said you'd better
tell us why you killed Gambino.
Why did you kill him?
Hmm?
- I'll tell you! It's true. We did it!
- Huh?
We killed him because Gambino
was sleeping with his wife, Ester.
She's also my sister.
We had to do it to avenge our honor.
How could we have known
that he was one of your guys?
Yeah. Yes.
Are we're supposed to believe you?
You're talkin' a lot of nonsense.
No! No! I swear to you.
There's proof. Look here in my tool belt.
Take it. There's your proof. Take it!
Press play!
I wanted to use it
against Ester in case we got a divorce.
Hi, Alberto.
It's Ester.
I know I was the one who canceled,
but I've changed my mind.
I just found out
my husband is going to Castelmonte
and won't be back until tonight.
So, wait for me,
because I will be with you soon.
See you soon, my tortellone.
Tortellone!
The Holy Father says
that the cuckold and the cuckold's friend,
without meaning to, have done us a favor.
So, guys,
let's show these men some respect.
- Bravo!
- Well done.
Well done!
Well done.
So, are you both still frightened?
Do you want a glass of water?
Buon appetito, gentlemen.
To our guests and this amazing sauce
the Holy Father has made us.
Cheers!
What?
Why don't you eat?
I just don't like carbohydrates.
What the fuck is wrong with you. Eat it!
So tell me this.
Have you ever tasted a sauce so good?
- Yum.
- Mm, it's excellent.
- Mm.
- Eh.
I do prefer my mom's sauce
because there's less onions, you know?
How dare you say
your mother's sauce is better.
Calm down, Useless Thing.
You're very lucky
that we're all such nice people here.
Yes, you can tell.
Here. Taste this.
I'll take it.
- Mm.
- Do you like it?
Exceptional.
It's primo sale. My passion.
- Nice, nice, nice.
- Yeah?
Well done, you behave like a man.
Well, anyone in my place
would kill his wife's lover, right?
Well, we got a new problem.
Your wife might know a few things
we don't want her to.
That's not good for us.
So the Holy Father has ordered that
your wife go and be with her tortellone.
- Tortellone.
You don't put a hand on my wife.
I'll take her out.
It would be an honor.
You're giving me faith in the human race.
Where have our traditional values gone?
I'll tell ya.
Locked away!
With all our friends who got arrested.
I know.
If they got arrested,
then we did something wrong.
But we're still the Mafia.
We're hidden, but we're still here.
Right up until the government
lowers their defenses.
- Ka-kah!
- Oh God!
We'll cut their head off.
Way back when, to be part of Cosa Nostra,
you needed courage.
Now you need patience.
Yeah, patience.
To the old days.
Cheers to that.
Hey, here's some for you.
No, I'm allergic to dairy products.
Oh, well. More for me.
Listen.
The Holy Father wants to know
what that piece of shit Gambino
managed to tell the police.
And seeing as how
you're in love with the chief…
Well, no, I think
you're a little confused
because I'm not in love with her.
- You're into her.
- I'm not into her.
You're into her!
I'm not into her.
You're into her!
I'm into her.
Huh. I could see it in your eyes.
It's just that I'd prefer
not to do that to her.
Oh, what's the problem?
- There is no problem.
- Exactly.
We'll have someone else do it.
That's right. Anyone else could do it.
I could do it,
but I'd probably do it wrong.
Yeah.
Whereas you guys are experts.
Wouldn't you agree?
- Or he'd make a mistake.
- You know?
We'll get someone else. Yeah, don't worry.
Actually, let's make a toast
to this hero's mom,
who apparently makes a special sauce.
What is your mother's name?
Antonietta.
To Mrs. Antonietta.
May you bless this lady
with another 100 years of good health!
To my mother!
Listen. Thinking about it,
that thing about the cop,
the one I'm into, we can do it.
I hope you're not saying it because
you think that I would get offended.
Mr. Primo Sale, are you kidding me?
Now that we're on such good terms,
if you think something like that,
I'm the one who's offended.
Okay, yeah. Bravo. I'm glad.
Bon appétit.
Holy Father has a question.
What day next week
can we all get together?
The best days
for him are Tuesday and Friday.
Well, as far as I am concerned,
tell him I'm always available.
What about you, Scientist?
I can't on Friday.
I'm installing Internet in an apartment.
What about you, Geppetto?
I got to install two solid wooden doors
on Tuesday, so no.
Stockfish?
I just don't know why we have to keep
getting together on the days
we do the most business at my shop.
And you, Class Act?
No, I've gotta study for my law exams.
I don't pass, I don't graduate.
Nah, nah, let the boy keep studying.
I can do Friday.
However, I have to leave at five.
There's an anti-Mafia candlelight vigil
at the town hall I need to be at.
But this is no good. Work with me here.
Shall we meet on Zoom?
I haven't got Zoom. Let's do Skype.
No, no, no, no, let's download Houseparty.
Let's do WhatsApp. Everyone's got that.
- What's what?
- Come on.
If you touch my sister, I'll report you.
I don't care about the Mafia.
I'm not actually gonna kill her,
you idiot.
- You said you'd kill her.
- I had to say that to save her.
- Otherwise, they'd kill her.
- How is that saving her?
I don't know.
What do you think I should say?
I want you to say you're sorry
because it's your fault
we're here in the first place.
But not your sister's fault for
wanting to go out and screw the wrong guy.
The thriller expert. The thrillologist.
And now I have to figure out some way
that the woman who betrayed me
doesn't get herself murdered.
Anyway, we'll figure out
what to do about her later.
You go find out
what Agata knows about Gambino.
And how should I do that, though?
How should I know?
Come on! Ask her out to dinner.
Valentino?
But please, make sure there's no cheese
because I'm allergic to dairy products.
Of course. Don't worry.
And for your wine?
It's the lady's choice.
Are you allergic to wine too?
Not to wine, no.
Hmm.
Ah, I see you have Limnio.
This is one I haven't drunk in ages.
- I'd like that, please.
- Wonderful choice.
You know, I read
that Aristotle spoke about this wine.
I get it. You did that whole thing
so you could talk about the time
that our school friends
decided to lock us up in the cupboard.
- No!
- Huh?
No.
- In Greece.
- That's not what I'm saying. No.
Maybe involuntary association,
but involuntary.
- Involuntary?
- Involuntary, Vale. I swear.
The whole class laughed all day.
Not the whole class. I wasn't laughing.
Actually, I never totally understood
why they decided to play that prank
on the two of us.
Mysterious.
I remember you had
one of your claustrophobic attacks.
- That's right. I used to get those.
And I remember you were so scared
I said to close your eyes
and imagine being in a beautiful field
on a beautiful sunny day.
That's when I took your hand,
and then I start to sing.
- Do you remember?
- Of course I do!
- That's where I learned it.
- Uh, yeah.
- Oh my goodness.
Will you be the one tasting?
Yes, thank you.
Hmm.
I think it may need
to air out a little first.
Did you lock it up in the cupboard?
No, don't mind us. We're just joking.
We were talking
about how when we were in high school
our friends locked us up
in the cupboard to scare us,
but it's in the past now. Right?
Are you still scared?
Can I get you a glass of water?
Yes, please.
Ah.
You might wanna take advantage
of Black Friday to update your cell phone.
No, I'm just really attached
to this old phone.
- Oh, I see.
- I can barely put it down.
Stockfish!
Are you going to be much longer?
My customers prefer that they're shelled.
Do you want one?
These are prawns from Pietrammare.
No, just hurry up.
Nothing gets past you, does it?
You can tell you're a police officer.
Speaking of which, I wanted to ask you
something about that case.
The one where, you know,
that accountant was killed.
- Hmm.
- That Gambino or Gambini.
Gambino.
- Ah, Gambino.
- Yes.
Was he really part of the Mafia?
Yes.
But they'd been wiretapping him
for a while.
It's just that I was still in Milan.
Then as soon as I got into town
and read the wiretap transcriptions,
I decided to put some pressure on him.
Oh.
And to my surprise,
he started saying names.
But he was nervous, scared.
So I reminded him that,
if he decided to talk to us,
we had the means to protect him.
Of course.
- If he didn't, then we couldn't help out.
- Yeah.
He said that he needed to consider things.
And while he was considering,
they killed him.
Unfortunately.
In the meantime, though,
he must've said something important.
That's why he was killed.
Are you a sleuth now?
No, I just really
like those TV detective shows.
- Ah. Okay.
- A guilty pleasure.
- That's the only reason.
- Ha ha. Those series.
You have all become detectives, huh?
- Oh boy.
Sorry, I have to take this.
Lo Russo?
Tell me everything.
HOME APPLIANCES
Uh, excuse me.
The bathroom?
- It's right over there.
- Thank you.
And what do you want me to say to that?
If they cleaned everything, then we're
obviously dealing with professionals.
Well, the only noteworthy thing
we've found
was a laptop that the victim
had hidden behind a fake wall.
Yes, a laptop.
It's obviously password protected. Yes.
The public prosecutor ordered it
to be filed as evidence.
Yes, but I think we'll find something
as soon as we can crack it.
Goodbye, Lo Russo. Have a good night.
What were you thinking
of using this gun for?
What are you doing?
Oh, don't do that. It's loaded!
- Be careful!
- Thought you'd walk in and kill me?
What did you and Valentino do?
And I don't want a lie!
I always tell the truth to you.
You liar!
Oh, I'm a liar? You have a lover,
and you're telling me that I'm the liar?
- Come on!
- You thought it was okay to shoot him?
I didn't shoot your tortellone!
So what are you doing outside his house?
No, no, I was in Castelmonte all day.
You went to Castelmonte
after you killed him, you liar!
What are you doing? Hey!
Hey, what are you doing?
Go on and kill me!
Then for once in your life
you'll notice me!
No.
Oh.
The usual story
of the wife who feels neglected,
so she goes out
and gets herself a Mafioso!
How would I know that he's a Mafioso?
How could you not know that
about your lover?
Unlike you, he made me feel important.
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.
Where'd you find the guy?
Over at the Mafia store?
He was at yoga,
which you never once took with me.
No possibility that you'll ever get me
to your hippie yoga classes.
Tell me, what's so good about this guy?
He's handsome, for starters.
Well, this is
the second time I've seen you.
And look. You're more beautiful now
with your new haircut.
I'm glad you noticed.
My lady, how could you not notice
the sun as it rises in the morning?
Namaste.
Gambino.
Alberto Gambino.
Oh, was he handsome?
Handsome fella! Handsome! Well!
- Yes.
- Okay.
Did you love him, though?
I want to know if you loved him.
Did you love him?
The one thing that I did love
is that I felt important.
And you? Were you in love
with the supermarket cashier?
But of course
you'd bring that up right now.
Ancient history. Let it go.
This will be ancient history
in a while too.
You wanna shoot me, do it.
Let's get this thing over with.
I'm back.
So sorry about that.
Oh, no worries.
Anyways, where did we leave things?
Uh, we were talking about work.
- Your work.
- Ah, yes. Let's move on, all right?
Yeah, let's change the subject.
Enough with the work! Please!
- Ah, finally arrived.
- Here you go.
- I was joking.
- It's all right.
- No cheese, right?
- No.
- So my mom didn't make this?
About that, I see you've got
a wonderful relationship with your mom.
Eh.
If only I had the same with my son.
Son?
I thought you said you weren't married.
So what?
That means I can't have a son?
Oh. Well, I guess anything's possible.
For now,
he's staying with that father of his.
- There's a father too?
- I didn't create him in a lab.
But anyway, I don't want
to talk about his father.
He was only good at lying to me.
He never was, uh…
It was just impossible for him
to be honest.
And he always…
was lying, you know?
He was a pathological liar.
And I was a fool for trusting him.
Moving on. That's enough talk
about unpleasant things.
To the fantastic class G
and to being locked in a cupboard.
To getting locked in a cupboard.
Come on. It's late.
I've still gotta go and install
those doors tomorrow.
And I don't want to reschedule it.
Oh, you're here.
- What's going on in here?
- Come on. Come in.
What have you done to my sister?
- Is he still down there?
- Who?
- Useless Thing.
- Why do you always have to insult me?
No, not you. Well, actually, yes, you.
But I'm talking
about the Useless Thing downstairs.
You did it again!
D'oh.
Are you two finished?
We need the body out of here now.
Whose body is it?
It's mine.
- You stop the talking.
- Oh, I see. You're staging a murder.
I nearly fainted.
Salvo, next time, warn me.
Next time, I'll send you a text.
- Useless Thing.
- He's down there.
That time it was for you!
Let's go.
Well done.
All done.
Good work, gentlemen.
That's two you've done now.
You're making a career here.
Open it.
But…
Open it.
Shame. She was beautiful.
- Have you checked to see if she's dead?
- It's pretty clear she's passed on.
No, you need to check the jugular.
We can't risk burying
people who are still alive.
We're Mafia, but we're not cruel.
All right, I'll do it.
Uh, Mr. Useless Thing…
Mr. Tonino.
I wanted to tell you something.
Something about my lady cop friend.
I heard some other information.
I just didn't have
my phone on me at that moment,
and you couldn't hear what she was saying.
And what did she say?
Uh, she basically said they
found a computer, a laptop,
at Gambino's apartment,
and he, apparently,
was hiding proof on the computer.
And where is this computer at now?
It was filed as evidence.
Good.
Well done. That's great work.
- This is yours now. I--
- No.
Never take this phone off of you.
And every time you see that cop lady,
you give us a call, okay?
- My agreement was--
- There is no agreement.
We need to find out every word
that Gambino said to her.
Is that clear?
Make her disappear.
Yes, we'll cut her up into little pieces.
And then we'll feed her to the pigs.
In different farms, of course.
Yes.
Thank you.
Thank you? You can just thank
this brother of yours.
This is just great.
And she keeps on talking.
She cheated on me
and she's got a lot to say.
I'd say we're even now, wouldn't you?
What's that got to do with anything?
That cashier seduced him.
- Oh, so you knew about it?
- Of course I knew about it.
So why are you lecturing me
when you knew that?
It's just that you're a woman,
and he's a man. It's normal.
- Okay, so he's allowed to cheat?
- Of course.
Listen, I'd love it
if you'd stop trying to help.
Go! Let's get out of here
and hide her somewhere.
You're a Neanderthal.
Guys, the pastry shop is closed at night.
No, uh, we're looking for shelter.
We can't give shelter to tourists.
When pilgrims come, we can give shelter.
Is that what you are?
Yes, we are.
This is our first stop
before we go and find the Holy Land.
Really?
- Yeah.
- Great!
You'll be pleased then, because you're
just in time for evening prayers.
Welcome, brothers and sisters.
Amen!
- Twenty-five euros a night?
- It's reasonable.
All right, let's say three nights.
- You gonna give me a receipt?
- Huh?
Are you sure I shouldn't call Mom
and tell her I'm okay?
Better not for the time being.
And remember,
do not use your phone
for any reason at all. It's important.
How long do I have
to stay here with these monks?
We don't know yet,
but we'll keep you updated.
Would you watch out for yourself?
These people are very dangerous.
Yeah.
Breakfast is a separate payment.
Huh?
The Lord will provide.
Ah.
- Come with me, miss.
- Thank you.
Bye.
You have reached the voicemail service.
- Hello, you have…
- Where's the breakfast?
This is becoming a habit for you, Mom.
I might as well go and live on my own.
It's no use. The phone is off.
- Whose phone?
- Your sister's phone.
It's been turned off since last night.
Maybe it's broken.
Why do you always have to be so anxious
if you can't get a hold of her right then?
- I'll get it. Don't move. I'll go.
Agata.
Valentino?
- I didn't think I'd run into you.
- Yeah…
I came to visit my mother.
- Oh.
- Yeah. And you?
Oh, Ester asked me
to bring her these photos,
but she didn't pick up her phone, so…
My daughter has gone missing!
What do you mean?
She's not at work.
Her phone's been switched off.
- And now her husband killed her!
- Yeah, what are you talking about, Mom?
No, a mother can feel things
when they're going wrong.
Why don't you just go upstairs
and make a cake
and fill it with lots of ricotta.
Let's go. Go on. Into the kitchen.
Madam, don't worry.
I'll look into it for you, okay?
Thank you.
One daughter!
That's all God ever gave to me.
God gave you a son too.
Agata, I'm mortified.
Look, I'm sorry about my mom.
She's got senile dementia.
And it's getting worse the older she gets.
She was never really
in a good state, honestly.
You'd never know she has dementia.
You wouldn't think so,
but she does live in her own reality.
She sees things that aren't there.
So shouldn't you go back
and move in with her again?
She hasn't even noticed
that he's gone yet.
- Are you sure?
- Yes. Really.
Anyway, you were saying
something before about missing evidence.
Yes, it was a computer we found
hidden in the walls
when we were searching through Gambino's.
- Just last night?
- They knew what they were looking for.
I am so angry about it.
This should never have happened.
The only explanation is
that they have spies all over.
Yeah, that's it. That's gotta be it.
Bastards.
Let me get out.
There you go.
Thank you.
Guys, thank you for the lift.
You didn't have to.
No, we didn't,
but we couldn't let you take a taxi.
I mean, just thinking that there was
a killer in our building makes me nervous.
Anyway, if I remember anything at all,
Officer, I'll let you know.
Hey again, mister.
Do you know this man?
Yeah, I do.
We saw him the other day,
on the stairs in our building.
He was playing cops and robbers
out in the hallway that day.
Shut up.
Would you like it if your game was ruined?
- Surely it's finished by now.
- What if it's not, though?
Can't you see there's cops right there?
They can still catch him.
This man came
to your building the other day to play?
I'm sorry, but we told him
that we wouldn't talk to anyone.
You can talk now,
because the game is finished.
It's finished, right?
- The other day, when?
- The day of the strike.
Shut up!
Sir, I told you.
There was a strike at school on Monday,
and the children stayed at home.
I believe that we all
need to have a very long talk.
See? Now the cops are playing too.
Here she is, coming out!
We can see her right now.
Let's hear what
our new deputy police chief has to say.
- Ms. Scalia, please go ahead.
- Agata!
- There isn't much we can say.
- Ah. So you're friends with the cops?
I can only say that,
to the public,
Gambino appeared
to be a respectable accountant.
He was working with the Mafia.
That's the lady
who came all the way from Milan
just so she could wage war on the Mafia.
That's enough.
Let's get it over with, huh?
That's enough.
However, Gambino had recently chosen
to cooperate with the law.
It was thanks to his statement
that we've been able to make
countless arrests over the past few days.
He would've been placed
in witness protection soon,
but unfortunately, someone decided
to silence him first.
We're examining all movement
at the murder scene.
and we're hoping that we will be able
to bring the perpetrators to justice soon.
Thank you so much
for giving us your time.
So for the time being,
that's all we have to report on.
And now, back to you at the station.
The Holy Father has spoken.
He said you'd better
tell us why you killed Gambino.
Why did you kill him?
Hmm?
- I'll tell you! It's true. We did it!
- Huh?
We killed him because Gambino
was sleeping with his wife, Ester.
She's also my sister.
We had to do it to avenge our honor.
How could we have known
that he was one of your guys?
Yeah. Yes.
Are we're supposed to believe you?
You're talkin' a lot of nonsense.
No! No! I swear to you.
There's proof. Look here in my tool belt.
Take it. There's your proof. Take it!
Press play!
I wanted to use it
against Ester in case we got a divorce.
Hi, Alberto.
It's Ester.
I know I was the one who canceled,
but I've changed my mind.
I just found out
my husband is going to Castelmonte
and won't be back until tonight.
So, wait for me,
because I will be with you soon.
See you soon, my tortellone.
Tortellone!
The Holy Father says
that the cuckold and the cuckold's friend,
without meaning to, have done us a favor.
So, guys,
let's show these men some respect.
- Bravo!
- Well done.
Well done!
Well done.
So, are you both still frightened?
Do you want a glass of water?
Buon appetito, gentlemen.
To our guests and this amazing sauce
the Holy Father has made us.
Cheers!
What?
Why don't you eat?
I just don't like carbohydrates.
What the fuck is wrong with you. Eat it!
So tell me this.
Have you ever tasted a sauce so good?
- Yum.
- Mm, it's excellent.
- Mm.
- Eh.
I do prefer my mom's sauce
because there's less onions, you know?
How dare you say
your mother's sauce is better.
Calm down, Useless Thing.
You're very lucky
that we're all such nice people here.
Yes, you can tell.
Here. Taste this.
I'll take it.
- Mm.
- Do you like it?
Exceptional.
It's primo sale. My passion.
- Nice, nice, nice.
- Yeah?
Well done, you behave like a man.
Well, anyone in my place
would kill his wife's lover, right?
Well, we got a new problem.
Your wife might know a few things
we don't want her to.
That's not good for us.
So the Holy Father has ordered that
your wife go and be with her tortellone.
- Tortellone.
You don't put a hand on my wife.
I'll take her out.
It would be an honor.
You're giving me faith in the human race.
Where have our traditional values gone?
I'll tell ya.
Locked away!
With all our friends who got arrested.
I know.
If they got arrested,
then we did something wrong.
But we're still the Mafia.
We're hidden, but we're still here.
Right up until the government
lowers their defenses.
- Ka-kah!
- Oh God!
We'll cut their head off.
Way back when, to be part of Cosa Nostra,
you needed courage.
Now you need patience.
Yeah, patience.
To the old days.
Cheers to that.
Hey, here's some for you.
No, I'm allergic to dairy products.
Oh, well. More for me.
Listen.
The Holy Father wants to know
what that piece of shit Gambino
managed to tell the police.
And seeing as how
you're in love with the chief…
Well, no, I think
you're a little confused
because I'm not in love with her.
- You're into her.
- I'm not into her.
You're into her!
I'm not into her.
You're into her!
I'm into her.
Huh. I could see it in your eyes.
It's just that I'd prefer
not to do that to her.
Oh, what's the problem?
- There is no problem.
- Exactly.
We'll have someone else do it.
That's right. Anyone else could do it.
I could do it,
but I'd probably do it wrong.
Yeah.
Whereas you guys are experts.
Wouldn't you agree?
- Or he'd make a mistake.
- You know?
We'll get someone else. Yeah, don't worry.
Actually, let's make a toast
to this hero's mom,
who apparently makes a special sauce.
What is your mother's name?
Antonietta.
To Mrs. Antonietta.
May you bless this lady
with another 100 years of good health!
To my mother!
Listen. Thinking about it,
that thing about the cop,
the one I'm into, we can do it.
I hope you're not saying it because
you think that I would get offended.
Mr. Primo Sale, are you kidding me?
Now that we're on such good terms,
if you think something like that,
I'm the one who's offended.
Okay, yeah. Bravo. I'm glad.
Bon appétit.
Holy Father has a question.
What day next week
can we all get together?
The best days
for him are Tuesday and Friday.
Well, as far as I am concerned,
tell him I'm always available.
What about you, Scientist?
I can't on Friday.
I'm installing Internet in an apartment.
What about you, Geppetto?
I got to install two solid wooden doors
on Tuesday, so no.
Stockfish?
I just don't know why we have to keep
getting together on the days
we do the most business at my shop.
And you, Class Act?
No, I've gotta study for my law exams.
I don't pass, I don't graduate.
Nah, nah, let the boy keep studying.
I can do Friday.
However, I have to leave at five.
There's an anti-Mafia candlelight vigil
at the town hall I need to be at.
But this is no good. Work with me here.
Shall we meet on Zoom?
I haven't got Zoom. Let's do Skype.
No, no, no, no, let's download Houseparty.
Let's do WhatsApp. Everyone's got that.
- What's what?
- Come on.
If you touch my sister, I'll report you.
I don't care about the Mafia.
I'm not actually gonna kill her,
you idiot.
- You said you'd kill her.
- I had to say that to save her.
- Otherwise, they'd kill her.
- How is that saving her?
I don't know.
What do you think I should say?
I want you to say you're sorry
because it's your fault
we're here in the first place.
But not your sister's fault for
wanting to go out and screw the wrong guy.
The thriller expert. The thrillologist.
And now I have to figure out some way
that the woman who betrayed me
doesn't get herself murdered.
Anyway, we'll figure out
what to do about her later.
You go find out
what Agata knows about Gambino.
And how should I do that, though?
How should I know?
Come on! Ask her out to dinner.
Valentino?
But please, make sure there's no cheese
because I'm allergic to dairy products.
Of course. Don't worry.
And for your wine?
It's the lady's choice.
Are you allergic to wine too?
Not to wine, no.
Hmm.
Ah, I see you have Limnio.
This is one I haven't drunk in ages.
- I'd like that, please.
- Wonderful choice.
You know, I read
that Aristotle spoke about this wine.
I get it. You did that whole thing
so you could talk about the time
that our school friends
decided to lock us up in the cupboard.
- No!
- Huh?
No.
- In Greece.
- That's not what I'm saying. No.
Maybe involuntary association,
but involuntary.
- Involuntary?
- Involuntary, Vale. I swear.
The whole class laughed all day.
Not the whole class. I wasn't laughing.
Actually, I never totally understood
why they decided to play that prank
on the two of us.
Mysterious.
I remember you had
one of your claustrophobic attacks.
- That's right. I used to get those.
And I remember you were so scared
I said to close your eyes
and imagine being in a beautiful field
on a beautiful sunny day.
That's when I took your hand,
and then I start to sing.
- Do you remember?
- Of course I do!
- That's where I learned it.
- Uh, yeah.
- Oh my goodness.
Will you be the one tasting?
Yes, thank you.
Hmm.
I think it may need
to air out a little first.
Did you lock it up in the cupboard?
No, don't mind us. We're just joking.
We were talking
about how when we were in high school
our friends locked us up
in the cupboard to scare us,
but it's in the past now. Right?
Are you still scared?
Can I get you a glass of water?
Yes, please.
Ah.
You might wanna take advantage
of Black Friday to update your cell phone.
No, I'm just really attached
to this old phone.
- Oh, I see.
- I can barely put it down.
Stockfish!
Are you going to be much longer?
My customers prefer that they're shelled.
Do you want one?
These are prawns from Pietrammare.
No, just hurry up.
Nothing gets past you, does it?
You can tell you're a police officer.
Speaking of which, I wanted to ask you
something about that case.
The one where, you know,
that accountant was killed.
- Hmm.
- That Gambino or Gambini.
Gambino.
- Ah, Gambino.
- Yes.
Was he really part of the Mafia?
Yes.
But they'd been wiretapping him
for a while.
It's just that I was still in Milan.
Then as soon as I got into town
and read the wiretap transcriptions,
I decided to put some pressure on him.
Oh.
And to my surprise,
he started saying names.
But he was nervous, scared.
So I reminded him that,
if he decided to talk to us,
we had the means to protect him.
Of course.
- If he didn't, then we couldn't help out.
- Yeah.
He said that he needed to consider things.
And while he was considering,
they killed him.
Unfortunately.
In the meantime, though,
he must've said something important.
That's why he was killed.
Are you a sleuth now?
No, I just really
like those TV detective shows.
- Ah. Okay.
- A guilty pleasure.
- That's the only reason.
- Ha ha. Those series.
You have all become detectives, huh?
- Oh boy.
Sorry, I have to take this.
Lo Russo?
Tell me everything.
HOME APPLIANCES
Uh, excuse me.
The bathroom?
- It's right over there.
- Thank you.
And what do you want me to say to that?
If they cleaned everything, then we're
obviously dealing with professionals.
Well, the only noteworthy thing
we've found
was a laptop that the victim
had hidden behind a fake wall.
Yes, a laptop.
It's obviously password protected. Yes.
The public prosecutor ordered it
to be filed as evidence.
Yes, but I think we'll find something
as soon as we can crack it.
Goodbye, Lo Russo. Have a good night.
What were you thinking
of using this gun for?
What are you doing?
Oh, don't do that. It's loaded!
- Be careful!
- Thought you'd walk in and kill me?
What did you and Valentino do?
And I don't want a lie!
I always tell the truth to you.
You liar!
Oh, I'm a liar? You have a lover,
and you're telling me that I'm the liar?
- Come on!
- You thought it was okay to shoot him?
I didn't shoot your tortellone!
So what are you doing outside his house?
No, no, I was in Castelmonte all day.
You went to Castelmonte
after you killed him, you liar!
What are you doing? Hey!
Hey, what are you doing?
Go on and kill me!
Then for once in your life
you'll notice me!
No.
Oh.
The usual story
of the wife who feels neglected,
so she goes out
and gets herself a Mafioso!
How would I know that he's a Mafioso?
How could you not know that
about your lover?
Unlike you, he made me feel important.
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.
Where'd you find the guy?
Over at the Mafia store?
He was at yoga,
which you never once took with me.
No possibility that you'll ever get me
to your hippie yoga classes.
Tell me, what's so good about this guy?
He's handsome, for starters.
Well, this is
the second time I've seen you.
And look. You're more beautiful now
with your new haircut.
I'm glad you noticed.
My lady, how could you not notice
the sun as it rises in the morning?
Namaste.
Gambino.
Alberto Gambino.
Oh, was he handsome?
Handsome fella! Handsome! Well!
- Yes.
- Okay.
Did you love him, though?
I want to know if you loved him.
Did you love him?
The one thing that I did love
is that I felt important.
And you? Were you in love
with the supermarket cashier?
But of course
you'd bring that up right now.
Ancient history. Let it go.
This will be ancient history
in a while too.
You wanna shoot me, do it.
Let's get this thing over with.
I'm back.
So sorry about that.
Oh, no worries.
Anyways, where did we leave things?
Uh, we were talking about work.
- Your work.
- Ah, yes. Let's move on, all right?
Yeah, let's change the subject.
Enough with the work! Please!
- Ah, finally arrived.
- Here you go.
- I was joking.
- It's all right.
- No cheese, right?
- No.
- So my mom didn't make this?
About that, I see you've got
a wonderful relationship with your mom.
Eh.
If only I had the same with my son.
Son?
I thought you said you weren't married.
So what?
That means I can't have a son?
Oh. Well, I guess anything's possible.
For now,
he's staying with that father of his.
- There's a father too?
- I didn't create him in a lab.
But anyway, I don't want
to talk about his father.
He was only good at lying to me.
He never was, uh…
It was just impossible for him
to be honest.
And he always…
was lying, you know?
He was a pathological liar.
And I was a fool for trusting him.
Moving on. That's enough talk
about unpleasant things.
To the fantastic class G
and to being locked in a cupboard.
To getting locked in a cupboard.
Come on. It's late.
I've still gotta go and install
those doors tomorrow.
And I don't want to reschedule it.
Oh, you're here.
- What's going on in here?
- Come on. Come in.
What have you done to my sister?
- Is he still down there?
- Who?
- Useless Thing.
- Why do you always have to insult me?
No, not you. Well, actually, yes, you.
But I'm talking
about the Useless Thing downstairs.
You did it again!
D'oh.
Are you two finished?
We need the body out of here now.
Whose body is it?
It's mine.
- You stop the talking.
- Oh, I see. You're staging a murder.
I nearly fainted.
Salvo, next time, warn me.
Next time, I'll send you a text.
- Useless Thing.
- He's down there.
That time it was for you!
Let's go.
Well done.
All done.
Good work, gentlemen.
That's two you've done now.
You're making a career here.
Open it.
But…
Open it.
Shame. She was beautiful.
- Have you checked to see if she's dead?
- It's pretty clear she's passed on.
No, you need to check the jugular.
We can't risk burying
people who are still alive.
We're Mafia, but we're not cruel.
All right, I'll do it.
Uh, Mr. Useless Thing…
Mr. Tonino.
I wanted to tell you something.
Something about my lady cop friend.
I heard some other information.
I just didn't have
my phone on me at that moment,
and you couldn't hear what she was saying.
And what did she say?
Uh, she basically said they
found a computer, a laptop,
at Gambino's apartment,
and he, apparently,
was hiding proof on the computer.
And where is this computer at now?
It was filed as evidence.
Good.
Well done. That's great work.
- This is yours now. I--
- No.
Never take this phone off of you.
And every time you see that cop lady,
you give us a call, okay?
- My agreement was--
- There is no agreement.
We need to find out every word
that Gambino said to her.
Is that clear?
Make her disappear.
Yes, we'll cut her up into little pieces.
And then we'll feed her to the pigs.
In different farms, of course.
Yes.
Thank you.
Thank you? You can just thank
this brother of yours.
This is just great.
And she keeps on talking.
She cheated on me
and she's got a lot to say.
I'd say we're even now, wouldn't you?
What's that got to do with anything?
That cashier seduced him.
- Oh, so you knew about it?
- Of course I knew about it.
So why are you lecturing me
when you knew that?
It's just that you're a woman,
and he's a man. It's normal.
- Okay, so he's allowed to cheat?
- Of course.
Listen, I'd love it
if you'd stop trying to help.
Go! Let's get out of here
and hide her somewhere.
You're a Neanderthal.
Guys, the pastry shop is closed at night.
No, uh, we're looking for shelter.
We can't give shelter to tourists.
When pilgrims come, we can give shelter.
Is that what you are?
Yes, we are.
This is our first stop
before we go and find the Holy Land.
Really?
- Yeah.
- Great!
You'll be pleased then, because you're
just in time for evening prayers.
Welcome, brothers and sisters.
Amen!
- Twenty-five euros a night?
- It's reasonable.
All right, let's say three nights.
- You gonna give me a receipt?
- Huh?
Are you sure I shouldn't call Mom
and tell her I'm okay?
Better not for the time being.
And remember,
do not use your phone
for any reason at all. It's important.
How long do I have
to stay here with these monks?
We don't know yet,
but we'll keep you updated.
Would you watch out for yourself?
These people are very dangerous.
Yeah.
Breakfast is a separate payment.
Huh?
The Lord will provide.
Ah.
- Come with me, miss.
- Thank you.
Bye.
You have reached the voicemail service.
- Hello, you have…
- Where's the breakfast?
This is becoming a habit for you, Mom.
I might as well go and live on my own.
It's no use. The phone is off.
- Whose phone?
- Your sister's phone.
It's been turned off since last night.
Maybe it's broken.
Why do you always have to be so anxious
if you can't get a hold of her right then?
- I'll get it. Don't move. I'll go.
Agata.
Valentino?
- I didn't think I'd run into you.
- Yeah…
I came to visit my mother.
- Oh.
- Yeah. And you?
Oh, Ester asked me
to bring her these photos,
but she didn't pick up her phone, so…
My daughter has gone missing!
What do you mean?
She's not at work.
Her phone's been switched off.
- And now her husband killed her!
- Yeah, what are you talking about, Mom?
No, a mother can feel things
when they're going wrong.
Why don't you just go upstairs
and make a cake
and fill it with lots of ricotta.
Let's go. Go on. Into the kitchen.
Madam, don't worry.
I'll look into it for you, okay?
Thank you.
One daughter!
That's all God ever gave to me.
God gave you a son too.
Agata, I'm mortified.
Look, I'm sorry about my mom.
She's got senile dementia.
And it's getting worse the older she gets.
She was never really
in a good state, honestly.
You'd never know she has dementia.
You wouldn't think so,
but she does live in her own reality.
She sees things that aren't there.
So shouldn't you go back
and move in with her again?
She hasn't even noticed
that he's gone yet.
- Are you sure?
- Yes. Really.
Anyway, you were saying
something before about missing evidence.
Yes, it was a computer we found
hidden in the walls
when we were searching through Gambino's.
- Just last night?
- They knew what they were looking for.
I am so angry about it.
This should never have happened.
The only explanation is
that they have spies all over.
Yeah, that's it. That's gotta be it.
Bastards.
Let me get out.
There you go.
Thank you.
Guys, thank you for the lift.
You didn't have to.
No, we didn't,
but we couldn't let you take a taxi.
I mean, just thinking that there was
a killer in our building makes me nervous.
Anyway, if I remember anything at all,
Officer, I'll let you know.
Hey again, mister.
Do you know this man?
Yeah, I do.
We saw him the other day,
on the stairs in our building.
He was playing cops and robbers
out in the hallway that day.
Shut up.
Would you like it if your game was ruined?
- Surely it's finished by now.
- What if it's not, though?
Can't you see there's cops right there?
They can still catch him.
This man came
to your building the other day to play?
I'm sorry, but we told him
that we wouldn't talk to anyone.
You can talk now,
because the game is finished.
It's finished, right?
- The other day, when?
- The day of the strike.
Shut up!
Sir, I told you.
There was a strike at school on Monday,
and the children stayed at home.
I believe that we all
need to have a very long talk.
See? Now the cops are playing too.