Fireball XL5 (1962–1963): Season 1, Episode 5 - Spy in Space - full transcript
A rogue spaceship wrecks the Space City patrol rockets including XL9. Steve, Venus and Professor Matic comes to this spaceship, to discover a couple of weird criminals, Boris and Griselda, known as "Space Spy", who attempts to steal XL5 from them
THE DOOMED PLANET
Don't ask questions, Steve. Fire all boosters.
Full power!
We're right in its path.
Fire top retros.
Steve, Venus, hang on to something.
For a minute I thought we'd had it.
Are you OK, Matt?
Yeah. Yeah, Steve.
How about you, Venus?
Gee, that was better than a roller coaster.
I'm OK, though...apart from a few bruises.
What happened, Matt?
Er ... A planet has broken orbit, Steve.
Eh, er...
I calculate it will collide with the planet Membrono
in ..eh ..21 days.
21 days? In space, that's no time at all.
If Membrono is doomed...
We've got to make sure the planet is uninhabited.
Approaching Membrono now, Steve.
Roger, Matt.
Just going into orbit. Fire main retros.
I'm sending Robert back to Central Control, Professor.
Roger, Steve. Nose cone ready to go.
Here we go.
Touchdown, A-Ok.
About to patrol planet.
Steve's leaving Fireball Junior now, Venus.
- No sign of life, Professor.
[PROFESSOR] - As we thought, Steve. (over intercom)
I don't think there's any point in
exploring any further, do you Steve?
I guess you're right, Professor.
But I've got a strange feeling I'm being watched.
I guess my imagination is playing tricks on me.
The place is deserted.
Okay, Professor. On my way back.
Steve's about to lift off, Venus.
Okay, Professor. I'll tell Robert to stand by.
Stand by, Robert for
Fireball Junior.
Standing by.
Prepare to receive Fireball Junior, Venus.
Roger, Professor.
Prepare to receive Fireball Junior, Robert.
Steer course 5-3-9-0 Green.
So if that planet is destroyed, Steve,
it will not really matter.
That's right. There's no evidence of life.
But you did have a feeling that
you were being observed.
Now, now, now, now Venus.
None of your feminine intuition.
Let's stick to the facts.
There's no life there.
So when it's destroyed, it will
mean just one planet less...
to worry about.
Well Robert, we're on the way home at last.
On our way home.
On our way home.
Fireball to Space City.
Patrol Code 8 terminated
Entering Earth's atmosphere now.
Roger, Firebal XL5.
Standing by.
Fire retros, Robert.
Fire retros.
Eh... Venus.
I can see an object just coming through the clouds.
I got a glimpse of it then, Matt.
I'd swear it was saucer shaped. Hey ...
you don't figure it's a flying saucer,
do you Professor?
Now Steve, don't start that again.
Yeah, Steve.
You'll feel a bit of a toot if
it was just another sunspot.
It's..eh..it's gone now, anyway.
Touchdown, A-Ok.
Cutting power.
- There it is again, Cmdr. Zero.
- I don't want to know about it.
How many times do I have to tell you
there's no such thing as a flying saucer?
Yes, sir.
But Cmdr., we definitely saw something that looked like one.
Now listen Steve, you're just tired out after the trip.
Do me a favor, will ya?
- Just forget it.
[STEVE]: - OK OK.
Have it your own way. I'll go and make out my report.
See you later Venus.
Okay, Steve. Pick me up and we'll go back to my place.
I've got a real cool disc I want you to hear.
Sure thing, Venus.
I took your Lazoon home this afternoon, Venus.
Hey, he sure is cute.
I know. Thanks for taking care of him, Commander.
Say, how is that your Lazoon of yours anyway, Venus?
Can he speak yet?
You'll just see when we get home, Steve.
Come in, Steve.
I expect my Lazoon is in the lounge.
There he is.
Now, wait for it, Steve.
Come on, wake up you lazy pooch
Welcome home.
That's what he's learned in three months since
we brought him back from planet Calevio.
That's great, Venus.
He sure looks as though he means it, too.
Well, he is lazy Lazoon, Steve.
Come on, let's have some coffee and listen to the disc.
Unidentifiable object landed at Atillo Beach, Cmdr.
Atillo Beach?
Let's see. That's where Venus has her beach house.
Scanner probe negative.
Roger lieutenant. Switch to the radar signal.
Keep tracing area.
Help yourself to coffee and sandwiches, Steve.
I'll play the flip side.
Hum...
Welcome home.
No, no, Zoonie, you've got it wrong.
You only say that when someone is coming in.
Uh... Uh...
Uh ... Welcome home.
He is welcoming someone, Venus.
My guess is, we've got a visitor.
I don't like it.
The radar screen is unchanged.
Ok, I'll sound the alarm.
The warning system!
My ray gun..iiitt..it's in the hovercar.
Hello?
Commander Zero, what is happening?
We've located a strange object near your house, Venus.
Steve's gone to look 'round now.
Find anything, Steve?
No, but there was someone or something here, all right.
Your Lazoon is not so dumb as he looks.
Venus, look!
The object is moving away from Earth.
I know you think I'm tooty, Commander Zero,
but I've just seen a flying saucer.
We know, Steve. We're getting a radio fix on it now.
Good. (chuckllng) I'll be right with ya.
Roger Steve. I'll alert Professor Matic.
Thank you Commander.
C'mon Venus. We're gonna track that saucer.
All systems go, Matt.
Clear for lift off, Steve.
What's the course, Cmdr?
The saucer is on 2-1-7-0 Red.
and steady, Steve. (over intercom)
Did you get that, Matt?
[PROFESSOR]: -Roger, Steve.
2-1-7-0 Red.
Saucer located, Professor.
Eh. I.. I...I see it, Steve.
It's eh.. it's slowing down.
Stand by to release interceptors, if necessary.
Roger, Steve.
Coming into range ...
Now!
- It's moved out of range.
[PROFESSOR]: - Full force, Steve.
Or we'll lose it.
It's no good, Matt. It's leaving us again.
Yes, Steve.
It's as though it wants us to follow.
We're approaching a planet, Professor.
Why Steve, that's eh... (over intercom)
[PROFESSOR}: it's Membrono: the doomed planet.
The saucer's landed Matt. I'm going down there.
But Steve, the other planet!
It'll eh... it'll collide.
I've gotta find out about this flying saucer. Professor
And I'm coming with you, Steve. (over intercom)
[VENUS]: -Okay, Professor. I'll take over here.
Ready to detach nose cone, Venus.
Roger, Steve. (over intercom)
Watch your step, Matt. We don't know what's waiting for us out there.
The evidence of the saucer's open, Matt.
Yess Steve, but ...eh..
I don't see anyone.
Who are you? Don't move or we fire.
He, eh ...
.. he doesn't seem to hear ya, Steve.
Heh..Wait!
Eh..He's pointing at something.
What is it, Matt?
It's Fireball Jr., Steve.
He's eh... he's trying to tell us something.
What could he want?
Bring the robot out of your spaceship.
Did you hear that, Matt? The voice is coming from the direction of the Fireball Jr.
I'll play with him. Get Robert.
Now, now, now...you.. you stand quite still.
Until Steve Zodiac gets back.
Do not be alarmed, Earth men.
Put away your weapons.
He's speaking through Robert.
I am transferring my thoughts
to the robot, Steve Zodiac.
We are of superior intelligence.
and have been observing your planet Earth for years.
You didn't lead us all this way to tell us that.
No, Colonel.
We have been in existence longer than any civilization.
We have learnt the futility of war.
Now we just want peace.
We have banished all weapons,
but now we will suffer the consequences.
How can that be if you are devoted to peace?
Because have no means of destroying the moving planet which...
threatens our world.
But I checked this planet.
I know, Steve Zodiac. I watched you.
But we live on our moon.
You see, it is a reverse pattern to your own Earth.
Ahh..do you mean, to say that, er ...
if Membrono is destroyed,
your moon will go out of orbit?
That is correct.
We need your help desperately.
You are good people.
Please destroy the moving planet with your
powerful missiles.
We'll be happy to help you, old fella.
I guess this is a good cause. Let's go, Professor.
Here we go.
Course instructions please, Professor.
Steer 3-9-9-0 Blue, Steve.
Roger. Blue 3-9-9-0.
Stand by with the interceptor 1, Steve.
Standing by.
- In range.
[VENUS]" - In range, Steve.
Master Guidance System - UHF.
Master Guidance System - UHF.
Ten seconds.
Ten seconds, Steve.
Standing by to correct course.
Six seconds.
Five, four, three,
two, one,
zero and go.
It's no good, Steve.
The interceptor isn't powerful enough
to stop planet moving.
What would happen if we fired three interceptors at once, Matt?
We it start an atomic chain reaction?
Yeah, it could, Steve. Its worth a try.
We have the range, Venus.
Stand by for interceptors
2, 3 and 4, Steve.
Standing by.
Five seconds,
five, four, three,
two, one,
zero and go.
All interceptors flying on target.
Yeah, it's working.
The planet is a ball of fire.
We're right in its path.
Steve,
if it doesn't burn itself out soon,
we really will be a fireball ...
Gee...
That sure was a close one!
Eh, eh ahh...
the saucer, Steve.
It's leaving Membrono.
Well ...
That's gratitude for ya.
He.. he didn't even wait to thank us.
That's life, I guess.
Thank you, Earth men.
We are pleased that your planet has progressed so well.
We will see each other again.
I am in your debt.
One day I can repay you.
Well, what do ya know?
I know one thing, Steve.
Cmdr. Zero will read our report
with a little more belief this time.
Now we all know that there are flying saucers, after all.
Translation - Rick Grago in sunny Delray Beach, FL
I wish I was a space man
The fastest guy alive
I'd fly you 'round the universe
In Fireball XL5
Way out in space to-gether
Conquerors of the sky...
My heart would be a Fireball
A Fireball...
Every time I gaze into your starry eyes
We'd take a path to Jupiter
And maybe very soon
We'd cruise along the Milky Way
And land upon the moon
While on the land of stardust
We'll zoom our way to Mars
My heart would be a Fireball
A Fireball...
Cuz you would be my Venus of the stars
Don't ask questions, Steve. Fire all boosters.
Full power!
We're right in its path.
Fire top retros.
Steve, Venus, hang on to something.
For a minute I thought we'd had it.
Are you OK, Matt?
Yeah. Yeah, Steve.
How about you, Venus?
Gee, that was better than a roller coaster.
I'm OK, though...apart from a few bruises.
What happened, Matt?
Er ... A planet has broken orbit, Steve.
Eh, er...
I calculate it will collide with the planet Membrono
in ..eh ..21 days.
21 days? In space, that's no time at all.
If Membrono is doomed...
We've got to make sure the planet is uninhabited.
Approaching Membrono now, Steve.
Roger, Matt.
Just going into orbit. Fire main retros.
I'm sending Robert back to Central Control, Professor.
Roger, Steve. Nose cone ready to go.
Here we go.
Touchdown, A-Ok.
About to patrol planet.
Steve's leaving Fireball Junior now, Venus.
- No sign of life, Professor.
[PROFESSOR] - As we thought, Steve. (over intercom)
I don't think there's any point in
exploring any further, do you Steve?
I guess you're right, Professor.
But I've got a strange feeling I'm being watched.
I guess my imagination is playing tricks on me.
The place is deserted.
Okay, Professor. On my way back.
Steve's about to lift off, Venus.
Okay, Professor. I'll tell Robert to stand by.
Stand by, Robert for
Fireball Junior.
Standing by.
Prepare to receive Fireball Junior, Venus.
Roger, Professor.
Prepare to receive Fireball Junior, Robert.
Steer course 5-3-9-0 Green.
So if that planet is destroyed, Steve,
it will not really matter.
That's right. There's no evidence of life.
But you did have a feeling that
you were being observed.
Now, now, now, now Venus.
None of your feminine intuition.
Let's stick to the facts.
There's no life there.
So when it's destroyed, it will
mean just one planet less...
to worry about.
Well Robert, we're on the way home at last.
On our way home.
On our way home.
Fireball to Space City.
Patrol Code 8 terminated
Entering Earth's atmosphere now.
Roger, Firebal XL5.
Standing by.
Fire retros, Robert.
Fire retros.
Eh... Venus.
I can see an object just coming through the clouds.
I got a glimpse of it then, Matt.
I'd swear it was saucer shaped. Hey ...
you don't figure it's a flying saucer,
do you Professor?
Now Steve, don't start that again.
Yeah, Steve.
You'll feel a bit of a toot if
it was just another sunspot.
It's..eh..it's gone now, anyway.
Touchdown, A-Ok.
Cutting power.
- There it is again, Cmdr. Zero.
- I don't want to know about it.
How many times do I have to tell you
there's no such thing as a flying saucer?
Yes, sir.
But Cmdr., we definitely saw something that looked like one.
Now listen Steve, you're just tired out after the trip.
Do me a favor, will ya?
- Just forget it.
[STEVE]: - OK OK.
Have it your own way. I'll go and make out my report.
See you later Venus.
Okay, Steve. Pick me up and we'll go back to my place.
I've got a real cool disc I want you to hear.
Sure thing, Venus.
I took your Lazoon home this afternoon, Venus.
Hey, he sure is cute.
I know. Thanks for taking care of him, Commander.
Say, how is that your Lazoon of yours anyway, Venus?
Can he speak yet?
You'll just see when we get home, Steve.
Come in, Steve.
I expect my Lazoon is in the lounge.
There he is.
Now, wait for it, Steve.
Come on, wake up you lazy pooch
Welcome home.
That's what he's learned in three months since
we brought him back from planet Calevio.
That's great, Venus.
He sure looks as though he means it, too.
Well, he is lazy Lazoon, Steve.
Come on, let's have some coffee and listen to the disc.
Unidentifiable object landed at Atillo Beach, Cmdr.
Atillo Beach?
Let's see. That's where Venus has her beach house.
Scanner probe negative.
Roger lieutenant. Switch to the radar signal.
Keep tracing area.
Help yourself to coffee and sandwiches, Steve.
I'll play the flip side.
Hum...
Welcome home.
No, no, Zoonie, you've got it wrong.
You only say that when someone is coming in.
Uh... Uh...
Uh ... Welcome home.
He is welcoming someone, Venus.
My guess is, we've got a visitor.
I don't like it.
The radar screen is unchanged.
Ok, I'll sound the alarm.
The warning system!
My ray gun..iiitt..it's in the hovercar.
Hello?
Commander Zero, what is happening?
We've located a strange object near your house, Venus.
Steve's gone to look 'round now.
Find anything, Steve?
No, but there was someone or something here, all right.
Your Lazoon is not so dumb as he looks.
Venus, look!
The object is moving away from Earth.
I know you think I'm tooty, Commander Zero,
but I've just seen a flying saucer.
We know, Steve. We're getting a radio fix on it now.
Good. (chuckllng) I'll be right with ya.
Roger Steve. I'll alert Professor Matic.
Thank you Commander.
C'mon Venus. We're gonna track that saucer.
All systems go, Matt.
Clear for lift off, Steve.
What's the course, Cmdr?
The saucer is on 2-1-7-0 Red.
and steady, Steve. (over intercom)
Did you get that, Matt?
[PROFESSOR]: -Roger, Steve.
2-1-7-0 Red.
Saucer located, Professor.
Eh. I.. I...I see it, Steve.
It's eh.. it's slowing down.
Stand by to release interceptors, if necessary.
Roger, Steve.
Coming into range ...
Now!
- It's moved out of range.
[PROFESSOR]: - Full force, Steve.
Or we'll lose it.
It's no good, Matt. It's leaving us again.
Yes, Steve.
It's as though it wants us to follow.
We're approaching a planet, Professor.
Why Steve, that's eh... (over intercom)
[PROFESSOR}: it's Membrono: the doomed planet.
The saucer's landed Matt. I'm going down there.
But Steve, the other planet!
It'll eh... it'll collide.
I've gotta find out about this flying saucer. Professor
And I'm coming with you, Steve. (over intercom)
[VENUS]: -Okay, Professor. I'll take over here.
Ready to detach nose cone, Venus.
Roger, Steve. (over intercom)
Watch your step, Matt. We don't know what's waiting for us out there.
The evidence of the saucer's open, Matt.
Yess Steve, but ...eh..
I don't see anyone.
Who are you? Don't move or we fire.
He, eh ...
.. he doesn't seem to hear ya, Steve.
Heh..Wait!
Eh..He's pointing at something.
What is it, Matt?
It's Fireball Jr., Steve.
He's eh... he's trying to tell us something.
What could he want?
Bring the robot out of your spaceship.
Did you hear that, Matt? The voice is coming from the direction of the Fireball Jr.
I'll play with him. Get Robert.
Now, now, now...you.. you stand quite still.
Until Steve Zodiac gets back.
Do not be alarmed, Earth men.
Put away your weapons.
He's speaking through Robert.
I am transferring my thoughts
to the robot, Steve Zodiac.
We are of superior intelligence.
and have been observing your planet Earth for years.
You didn't lead us all this way to tell us that.
No, Colonel.
We have been in existence longer than any civilization.
We have learnt the futility of war.
Now we just want peace.
We have banished all weapons,
but now we will suffer the consequences.
How can that be if you are devoted to peace?
Because have no means of destroying the moving planet which...
threatens our world.
But I checked this planet.
I know, Steve Zodiac. I watched you.
But we live on our moon.
You see, it is a reverse pattern to your own Earth.
Ahh..do you mean, to say that, er ...
if Membrono is destroyed,
your moon will go out of orbit?
That is correct.
We need your help desperately.
You are good people.
Please destroy the moving planet with your
powerful missiles.
We'll be happy to help you, old fella.
I guess this is a good cause. Let's go, Professor.
Here we go.
Course instructions please, Professor.
Steer 3-9-9-0 Blue, Steve.
Roger. Blue 3-9-9-0.
Stand by with the interceptor 1, Steve.
Standing by.
- In range.
[VENUS]" - In range, Steve.
Master Guidance System - UHF.
Master Guidance System - UHF.
Ten seconds.
Ten seconds, Steve.
Standing by to correct course.
Six seconds.
Five, four, three,
two, one,
zero and go.
It's no good, Steve.
The interceptor isn't powerful enough
to stop planet moving.
What would happen if we fired three interceptors at once, Matt?
We it start an atomic chain reaction?
Yeah, it could, Steve. Its worth a try.
We have the range, Venus.
Stand by for interceptors
2, 3 and 4, Steve.
Standing by.
Five seconds,
five, four, three,
two, one,
zero and go.
All interceptors flying on target.
Yeah, it's working.
The planet is a ball of fire.
We're right in its path.
Steve,
if it doesn't burn itself out soon,
we really will be a fireball ...
Gee...
That sure was a close one!
Eh, eh ahh...
the saucer, Steve.
It's leaving Membrono.
Well ...
That's gratitude for ya.
He.. he didn't even wait to thank us.
That's life, I guess.
Thank you, Earth men.
We are pleased that your planet has progressed so well.
We will see each other again.
I am in your debt.
One day I can repay you.
Well, what do ya know?
I know one thing, Steve.
Cmdr. Zero will read our report
with a little more belief this time.
Now we all know that there are flying saucers, after all.
Translation - Rick Grago in sunny Delray Beach, FL
I wish I was a space man
The fastest guy alive
I'd fly you 'round the universe
In Fireball XL5
Way out in space to-gether
Conquerors of the sky...
My heart would be a Fireball
A Fireball...
Every time I gaze into your starry eyes
We'd take a path to Jupiter
And maybe very soon
We'd cruise along the Milky Way
And land upon the moon
While on the land of stardust
We'll zoom our way to Mars
My heart would be a Fireball
A Fireball...
Cuz you would be my Venus of the stars