Find It Fix It Flog It (2016-2022): Season 2, Episode 22 - Episode #2.22 - full transcript

In Cheshire and the Wirral, Henry and Simon restore a 1920s dance hall lighting system, an antique butter churn, a huge theatre light and an old enamel advertising sign.

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The sheds, garages
and barns of Britain

are stacked with old possessions.

Oh...

Henry...

It may look like junk,

but it could be worth
a small fortune.

Bing!

Cor, I haven't seen one that big,
darling, for a while.

Carry on, sir.

Henry Cole and Simon O'Brien

can turn that clutter
into cold, hard cash.



We're going to get
great money for them.

For Henry and his mechanic...

I don't think you should be
looking at that, mate.

...it's all about restoring retro
relics and vintage classics...

Oh, yes!

...whilst up-cycling genius Simon
and his restorer

love turning everyday objects
into fantastic furniture.

Well, that's perfect!

Well, look, feast your eyes...

I reckon you've done great things.

Drop that down to release
the next bottle. Booomph!

They may have different tastes,

but they'll always make
the old turn to gold.

Going back with you, Alan,



is £6,380.

What am I going to do
with all that?

On today's show,
Henry's dreaming of the big time...

Now, that is Hollywood.

We'll just carry that around
with us everywhere we go.

...Simon's left hanging...

What are you doing?
Come on, I'm stuck!

...and at the valuation...

Have a look, mate.

...jaws drop.
What have you done?

I'm glad he's looking at you!

Today, Henry and Simon
are heading to the Wirral,

an area of the North West,

lying between the estuaries
of the River Dee and River Mersey.

Finally, somewhere
close to home for me.

I've got to tell you, mate,
it's a long drive up here.

Ah... You know what?
My heart bleeds!

Anyhow, here we are at
Myrtle Corner -

the meaning of Wirral.

Oh, is it? Yeah.

Wir - myrtle, heal - corner.

Myrtle Corner.

Although, funnily enough, there's
no myrtle around here any more.

We are going to
a beautiful estate.

What, a housing estate? No!

No, your kind of a estate, mate.
Oh, really?

POSH ACCENT: A nice estate.
I'm going to feel right at home.

Absolutely!

We're going to meet
a guy called Scirard

and his family
has lived in this place

for just on 1,000 years.

Cor, blimey! Really?

Simon's taking him
to the ancestral home

of the wonderfully-named
Scirard Lancelyn Green

to have a rummage around.

This is Poulton Hall

and the present building
dates from 1650,

with additions in 1720 and 1840.

And the family have been here
since 1093.

That's our earliest record.

So, as the family have
been there for so long

and with a large number
of rooms and outbuildings,

it shouldn't be too hard
to find some hidden gems.

We've got plenty of outbuildings
for Henry and Simon to look round

and I expect they'll find
some interesting things.

This is beautiful.

The boys' mission is
to find two items each

they think they can renovate
to make a tidy profit.

Scirard, how are you? I'm Simon.
Hello. This is Henry.

I'm Henry. Sorry, I'm in awe
already, sir, I have to tell you.

This place is amazing.

Now, Simon was saying in the car,

you've been here,
or your family has, a while.

Yes. Well, I haven't been here
900 years but the family has.

That's older than you.
It is, just about, yeah.

Thank you very much!

The family name sounds Norman. Yes,
de Launcelyn it was, originally.

We probably came in 1066,

but our earliest family records
go back to 1093.

So if we were to make
some money for you,

what would you spend
that on, do you think?

Something very boring, I expect,
like roof repairs or... drainage.

Right. Shall we?
Great, yeah. Let's go.

We'll see you in a little while,
if that's OK?

Thank you very much indeed, sir.

I guess we're heading down this way.
I guess we are. See you later.

Henry must be excited,

as he's just passed
a nifty little sports car

and hardly batted an eyelid.

You've just walked past
the flash Harry car

and didn't even look at it.

I'm sorry, mate, but there are
barns afoot - lots of them.

It's an MR2, mate.

You used to have one of them,
didn't you?

No, but my mate did
and I was really envious.

THEY BOTH CHUCKLE
Come on, then.

Hello, things...

No more lawn mowers!

This ain't a lawn mower, man.

This, I'll have you know...

...is a garden tractor.

A garden tractor is a mini version
of a farm tractor,

used for small-scale
towing and mowing.

Have you ever seen a garden tractor
that looks like a fridge?

And it's got an oblong
steering wheel!

So it's not
a steering wheel, is it?

Nope, it's most definitely
the original steering... rectangle.

I love it. You love it?

The ugliest little machine
I've ever seen in my life,

which I wouldn't have even
cast a glance at.

And Cole falls in love with it...

It is, in fact,
an Allen National 68-inch mower.

But this one is missing
its three rotary blades

so it's only useful as a tractor

unless Henry can
replace those blades.

This is where men are men
and grass is nervous.

Eh?

What's not to like about it?

Everything.

So Henry has his first item.

What? Now...

So what is it, wood burning?

And you've got your
hot plate here. Yeah.

The one thing to always check
with those old stoves

is that the bodywork isn't cracked.

That one is fantastic.

It might be multi-fuel.

IMITATES SIMON:
It might be multi-fuel!

You're getting on my nerves today.

This Jotul wood-burning stove
has been produced in Norway

since the 1860s.

Given Norway
is rather cold and woody,

there's no surprise
it's a top-quality stove.

That... Yeah.

...is a pretty piece of metal. Yeah.

That...

...is an ugly piece of metal.

This... burns things.

That... needs burning.

There's a huge market
for those wood burners,

so he's right to take it.

We'll make Scirard
some decent wedge out of that.

This is a pretty human being.

That...

Well, I'll leave it to you, son.

I didn't mean it.
One item each.

Oh, look! I might have found
my second item.

And that log burner is a very
pretty first item for Simon.

This is a shed, isn't it?

But with the family having been on
the site for almost 1,000 years,

there are plenty more places
to rummage through.

It's a big door. Wow.

A big garden shed room.

Oh, my God.

With loads and loads
of stage equipment.

Look at these beautiful lamps.
Oh, my word!

Check these out. You're right!

Man...!

They are stage lights
known as Super Troupers.

♪ Super troup... ♪

Do you want me to sing any more?
No.

But will Simon take a chance on them
to make some money, money, money?

You look like both the male members
of Abba mixed up. Yeah.

Yeah. So, male...

...female.

Now, that is Hollywood, isn't it?

But it's a different type of light
that's taken Henry's fancy.

Does it suit me?

I think it would bask me
in the right light.

Do you think? Yeah.

We'll just carry that round with us
everywhere we go.

What are those lenses called?

That, mate, is called a Fresnel.

Named after their inventor
Augustin-Jean Fresnel,

who developed the lens initially
for use in lighthouses,

Fresnel lamps are still used
in the film and stage industry

to give a soft, wide wash of light,

rather than a more focused beam.

I'll tell you what, for a pub,
restaurant or something like that,

Hollywood themed.
That's cool.

Henry's bagging it
for his second item

and Simon's hot on his heels
with another illuminating find.

Mate... What?

What the heck is that?

What on Earth...

...is that?

It's a Dalek.
No. Look, look, look...

I can see what happens.
That's one hell of a bulb. It is.

Look...

See that shape there? Yeah.

Have you got it? Yeah.

Is it for a dance hall
or something like that? Yeah.

But you know what it is?

It's unusual.

It is, in fact, a Spectrola,
a 1930s dancehall luminaire,

which would have hung from
the ceilings of dance halls,

creating a dappled lighting effect
throughout the room.

Are we done? Have we got two each?
Yeah.

So the search is done

and this could well be
the battle of the bulbs.

Enlighten me, please, Scirard.

This beautiful, is it Art Deco,
strange-looking thing,

What do you know about that?

Well, before the invention
of discotheques,

this was a lighting effect

and the whole thing
was on a rotating motor,

and it was the forerunner
of things like mirror balls.

So that would just scatter
the light.

But it's such a lovely thing.

I'd like to take that away

and let's see if we can
get that thing

shedding some light. It'll be
lovely to have it back in use.

My second item that I just thought
is just a lovely little thing,

this wood-burning stove here.

I think that's
an utterly saleable item,

so I'd like to take that
with me, give it some love,

and make you some money.
How about that?

Certainly, yes. Brilliant.

OK, over to you, Henry.

I've fallen in love
with your little tractor.

I just think it's so cool.

When did it last run?

Oh, about a year ago,
I should think.

OK, so we've got a chance
of getting it going. Yes.

Have you got the key?

We probably have somewhere on
the premises, but we can't find it.

OK.

Now, that beautiful lamp.

That smacks of Hollywood to me.

It certainly does.
Yes, that's right.

It's Mole-Richardson, which is the
brand that Hollywood tended to use.

So it really was the lamp that was
synonymous with the movies? Yes.

I am completely jealous
about that lamp.

But I don't mind that because
it's offset by that tractor.

You know, it's kind of like
the beauty and the beast,

isn't it, really?
A bit like me and you.

Yeah. I know, mate. One day, mate.

Coming up, Simon's delegating...

What's the obvious problem?

It's not the right colour.
That's right.

Thanks, mate.
All right, OK, I get you.

...Henry makes
an unwelcome discovery...

Let's clears the area,
let's walk away, mate.

...and at the fist valuation,
Henry waxes lyrical.

Feast your eyes on an aesthetically
stunning agricultural implement.

This is a shed. Look!

Expert restorers
Henry Cole and Simon O'Brien

are on a mission
to turn trash into cash.

What's not to like about it?

Everything.

They've picked up two items each

belonging to the wonderfully titled

Scirard Lancelyn Green.

In Liverpool, Simon has
just arrived to show his finds

to his upcycling expert Gemma.

First the unusual dancehall lamp.

Well, this is interesting.
I'm not sure what it is.

It's a Spectrola. Well,
I can see that. It says it there.

Curses!

Think of the dancehall days.

Before they had the disco lights,

they had these.

On the faces of all of these

there are mirrors, so that
the light bounces off the mirrors

and lights up the dancehall below.

Ah! So it's like a really retro
disco ball? That's what it is.

But let's see what condition it's
in when we clean it back... Yeah.

...get the mirrors in,

get the electrician to see if
the bulbs work, and there we go.

And next, the simple Scandinavian
wood-burning stove.

It's great. Give it some TLC

and I think this is really...
kind of saleable item. Yeah.

Let's get going. OK.

Over a million UK homes
have wood-burning stoves

and they are increasing
in popularity.

The stove will need a coat of
iron paste on the outside

and brand-new heat-reflecting
plates on the inside.

But first it needs
a jolly good clean.

I get all the brilliant jobs.

On the other side of the workshop,
handyman Phil is carefully

replacing the broken mirrors
on the Spectrola lamp.

Don't wanna float my own boat
but that's perfect.

And Simon has a bespoke
hanging rose for the lamp

which he has had specially made.

Phil, Phil, Phil.

As usual, Ian has done his magic.

This is the rose for
our dancehall light. Yes.

What's the obvious problem?
It's not the right colour.

That's right. Thanks, mate.
Oh, right, OK, I get you.

So Phil will have to be handy
with his rattle can.

A coat of primer...

...before the finishing golden touch.

That is good, that...
if you like gold.

In Oxfordshire, it's Henry's turn
to unleash his finds

on restoration buddy Guy Willison.

Yeah, sidle in here.

First,
the lawnmower-cum-garden-tractor.

You have some explaining to do.

I love the idea of saving the ugly
duckling of golden tractors.

I've done a bit of research
and I thought that it would have

a bonnet an all that on it.
Yes. But it never did.

It was always that ugly.

I know why it's called a National.

It's a national disaster.

Do you know how it works
when we get it going?

Uh... Ah.

I've got a bit of an issue.
Go on.

We're going to have to hot-wire it.

So in a nutshell we're going to
clean it and get it going if we can?

Yeah.

So hopefully in Guy's loving hands

this ugly duckling
will become a swan,

assuming he can conjure
up an ignition key.

Next, the wonderful
Hollywood film light.

Even this would make you look good.

Now, you don't find those
in a shed very often, do you?

No.
Let's not repurpose it.

Let's get it going for
what it should be used for.

But I think just a 100-watt,
normal, domestic light bulb. Yeah.

So I think we should rewire it,

or get the right person
to do so, clean it up...

But don't you think it's a cool
thing? It's lovely, yeah.

So there we go.

There's two very strange
and weird and wonderful items.

That's not strange. That is.

So as Henry disappears
to try and find a way

of starting the tractor,

the first thing Guy does
is check the spark plugs.

Even with a key, working
spark plugs will be essential

to starting the tractor.

When you're putting a spark plug
back in, always start it

with your fingers because
if you cross-thread it,

you won't ruin the thread
in the cylinder head.

Never put a ratchet
on it and wind it in.

So now that's done about three
or four turns,

then you can put your spanner on.

Well, that's a handy tip not
to damage your engine block.

Back inside the workshop

and it's time for
a closer inspection of the lamp.

So let's see what state
we're in inside.

Oh, cripes. Now, hang on.

Well, there's an issue
straight away.

I think the seal holding
the glass in,

I think it's asbestos rope.
Now, I could be wrong

but I'm not prepared
to take a chance with that

because that is dodgy if it is.

Asbestos as is a naturally occurring
compound that was used

from the late 19th century for sound
absorption and resistance to fire.

However, the fibres can be
incredibly carcinogenic

and it should only be
treated by experts.

Hopefully, though, if it is,
a specialist will remove it,

maybe onsite
with all the special gear,

bag it up safely
and dispose of it properly

and then we'll be able
to work on it.

We've just got to leave it
until we've had it checked.

Let's clear the area. Let's walk
away. That's such a shame, man!

I know, I know.

So the Hollywood lamp
is now a horror show.

Back in Liverpool,

and Simon is hard at work on the new
ceiling rose for the Spectrola lamp.

So I've taken out a section
of the back of the rose

so that Neil can get all
the cables that are coming through

into one fixing point,

and the last thing to do
is put a rubber grommet round this,

cos, of course, electric cables
with sharp metal edges are a no-no.

And while Simon looks
for his rubber grommet,

Gemma is applying a liberal coat
of iron paste to the stove.

It's probably gonna need
a few coats.

The paste will give
the stove a brand-new look.

It'll look great after this.

Gemma has also managed to get
her hands on a set of second-hand

baffle plates - iron plates
that line the inside of the stove

and deflect the heat outwards,
rather than straight up the chimney.

Right, need to work out where
these are going to go now.

Well, they aren't called
"baffle" plates for nothing.

It's stuck.

Here he comes now.

Back in Oxford, and
there's bad news for Henry.

Guy, you wanna come out for this.
Rob, is all right here, like that?

It is, it's sealed up now.

But it's not good news, I'm afraid.

We're going to need that.

Are we? We are.

So it is asbestos?
It is, yeah.

How much is it gonna cost to do it?

You're probably talking
about £680.

That's a write-off.

So it has to go back in the shed.
It can go back in the shed

or it'll need to be sealed up
a bit more and then disposed of.

Cheers, mate. Thank you so much.
Thanks. Thanks. All right, man.

Let's look at the bright side. At
least we can enjoy the tractor a bit

more cos we don't have to do this.
Well, true, we got more time now.

It is a shame.

So the lamp will shine no more,

as it would cost far more to safely
and legally remove the asbestos

than would ever be
realised in a sale.

With work on the lamp
ground to a halt,

the boys are desperate
to get the tractor started.

Well, I'm looking for something

that can substitute for a key.

There's gotta be something in there.

There's a broken key.

Surely not.

So that...

Wiggle it.
I think that might be on.

Ready? Yeah. You ready for
launch, Mission Control?

Come on. Gonna be here all day.

ENGINE STARTS

Hey, hey!

Argh!

That wasn't meant to happen.

Forwards, please.

We're off!

Finally, success,
and the tractor moves!

Well, kind of.

It's very fast, I see.

Really fast.

Is that flat-out?

And with work well underway
on the first set of items,

it's time for Henry's
choice of location,

and he's brought Simon to
the Cheshire town of Greasby

to the barns belonging
to Jon Appleby.

Hi, I'm Jon and I'm a dairy farmer.

We're selling milk
directly to the public,

unpasteurised,
straight from the cow.

I think there's a few weird
and wonderful things on the farm.

Some of the items have been here
before my dad got here in the '60s.

They've just lain in
the same place since then.

I hope you're "egg-cited", mate.
Hey, hey! I see what you did there.

Come on. What's going on?

Are you in the "moo-d"?

THEY LAUGH

Did you like that?
Yeah, very good, yeah.

Anyway, it's a small farm.
Don't know what's here, mate,

but I'm told there's
riches abound. OK.

Henry. Hello, Henry,
nice to meet you.

You all right?

How is business?
Cows are good, yeah.

We're making lots of milk
at the moment.

You said milk, I thought
you were gonna say making money.

No, we don't make any money.
We do it for the love of it.

As ever, Henry and Simon
must find two items each

that they can fix
and flog for profit.

If we do make you any money,
what would it go towards?

What I'd like to do is
give it to Claire House,

which is a local hospice
on the Wirral.

We will do our very best, mate.
Brilliant. Absolutely fantastic.

There's sheds, there's stables,
there's lofts.

There's everything.

Surely we're going to find
some lovely stuff here.

Well, the only way to find out
is to go behind the green doors.

Do you know what? What?
What do you smell?

Nothing, really.
It's too tidy, isn't it?

Come on. You know when not
to waste your time. Honestly.

So not the best start.

It's weird, isn't it?

After you've done this for a while,
you can just tell. Yeah.

Henry?
Yeah?

Now, my sixth sense is telling me...

...we've got to get up there.

I saw that door up into the loft

and they're the places
we want to be.

Give us a hand!
Help him, Henry!

Come on! I'm stuck!

Get yourself on here, mate.
Quick! On the ladder.

I've saved you.

That's the first time
you've ever been nice to me.

Once I'd leapt up that wall in
a Spider-Man fashion, I was right.

What, a load of wooden crates?
Are they fruit crates?

Yeah, I think you're right, mate.
Egg crates, perhaps?

And there's lots of them.
That's what I like.

Nice wheel. Yeah. A seeder.

That's what it is.
You know it. Yeah. Yeah.

Push it across the field,
they have a big bar across them.

Yeah. And the seeds come out of
that with a little mechanism.

I'm holding your arm. Why?

Look what I'm standing on.
Oh, hello.

Literally below his feet
was a perfect Henry item.

That lovely old enamel sign.

You're definitely going to get
some money for a charity there.

First item for me, I love that.

OK, then, if that's the case,
I'm taking them. OK, good.

Simon has his first item -
the seed potato crates.

They are shaped for stacking
but Simon sees their potential

for something completely different.

Knowing Simon, he'll come up
with something well cool.

And Henry has his first item -
the enamel tobacco sign.

It may not be as valuable as some
iconic motoring and cookery brands

but even this could raise
a sizeable sum.

Oh! This looks good. Yes.

Wow. It's oak. Beautiful.

Oh, is that what it is? Yeah.

It was a dresser once but there's
large sections of it missing.

So there should be another side
to it. Yeah. Yeah.

It's cute. Is it? Yeah, look.

There you go, they always come
to bits. Yeah, look at that.

Top section is good and you take
the bottom so the wood will match

when you put the base on it.
So is that your second item?

It's possible.
I quite like that.

You like it?
Do you think I'm weird today.

Yeah! Think it's the fresh air.
It's gone to your head.

You want it, it's yours.

So Henry has rather cheekily
snaffled the oak dresser

as his second item.

I actually don't mind it's yours at
all now. You found something else?

Nothing you'll like here.

Look at that.

No, that's lovely.

That would have been
brilliant for you.

But you've just got
your second item.

The churn is Simon's second item.

It would have worked by shaking up
the cream or milk inside

with the crank
on the side of the barrel.

This motion would create
a solid butter

and the remaining buttermilk
would be drained from the bottom.

I think we're done.
Let's go and see Jon.

Let's go and butter him up.
Hey!

All that remains is to check
that the owner Jon is happy

to let the items go.

If it's OK I'd love to take that.

I mean, tobacco branding isn't
as desirable as petrol stuff

and all that kind of thing

but still there's good money
to be made out of that. Yeah.

Let's move on to the dresser -
or half of it.

I think that's lovely.

The base, obviously, has seen
an awful lot of better days.

Yeah. Yeah?

But as a cabinet on its own

I think it'll come up beautiful,
you know?

So if it's OK with you,
that would be great.

So, talking about making something
useful out of something,

those crates, what were they used
for carrying?

They are seed potato crates. OK.

And I am going to turn them into...

...something. Right.

I'll be really interested
to see what you decide to do.

So will I.

THEY LAUGH

Sitting next to it I think
is the find of the day.

That beautiful butter churn. Do you
know what I'm gonna do with that?

That's easy. I'm going to
make that look like a beautiful

working butter churn.

Oh, that's fantastic.
Thank you so much, man.

We've had a great day today.
Absolute pleasure, mate.

Coming up, Guy's skill set
is put to the test...

You're gonna have to use all your
expertise but at the same time...

Expertise? Yeah. Worries me what the
other item is if that's one of them.

Here you go. They're for you.

...Simon's on poo duty,

and it's geography lessons
at the valuation.

I thought you thought Asbestos
was a Greek island, didn't you?

Hey, hey, hey, I like that!
That's funny!

Henry! Reclaimers and restorers
Henry Cole and Simon O'Brien

are on a mission to rid the world
of clutter...

It's got an oblong steering wheel!

...then fix it and flog it for cash.

Look at THAT. After picking up
today's second set of items

from the home of farmer
John Appleby,

Henry is back in Oxfordshire
to unveil his finds to Guy.

What do you reckon?

You're not serious, are you?

I just thought...
That is absolutely past it.

There was nothing else in the shed,
man. I just thought,

"Well, this could be quite nice."

You're going to have to use all
your expertise, but at the same...

Expertise? Yeah! Worries me
what the other item is,

if that's one of them. Well, there
was nothing there. This is it, mate.

This is the only item?

Yeah.

Apart from these two over here.
Ha-ha!

Oh, Henry - you old wag!

When he showed me that dresser base...

...my heart sank.

I thought he was serious!

So now let's get to the meat and potatoes.

Did I give you a shock or not?
Big shock.

Now obviously, the base of
the dresser is over there.

Yeah. But the top is solid.

Yeah. We're going to put a little
cornice on here

after we've done the woodworm
treatment. Mm.

Then we're going to polish it up,

because I think it's oak
and it's going to be lovely.

What do you reckon?
I quite like this.

I think it'll look nice
when it's done.

So that could have been worse
for Guy.

And now for Henry's second item...
It's in really good nick. Mm.

And obviously, if we do our wonders
with a little bit of soap and water,

then a bit of polish, and then just

love it and all that
kind of caper...

I think that's going to come
up a tweet. Happy days. Yes.

So nothing too tricky for Guy,
as they crack on

cleaning off the years of dirt
from the enamel sign.

Oh!

Oh, no!

With the sign now drying,

it's back inside to start on
the rather grubby oak chest.

A quick hoover for the outside, but
inside, it's a different matter.

If you want to know what live
woodworm looks like...

Yeah. ..there it is, man.

And the only way to fix the problem
is to treat the wood with a chemical

wash that will kill the woodworm
larvae once and for all.

Back in Liverpool, and it's Gemma's

turn to see what she has to work with.

Right...

We've been down the farm,
haven't we? Aaah!

OK...

We've got ten of these.
OK, ten. Yeah. That's a lot.

The question is... what to do
with them?

Possibly shelves, table?

There's so many things we could do
with these.

The possibilities are endless.

So, a world of possibilities
for the potato trays.

But what about the butter churn?

What is it?
Well, it was a dairy farm.

There's your clue.

OK, so it's a churner of some sort.
Correct, yes.

It's a butter churner.

AND it's in perfect working order.

It needs completely cleaning up.

We'll get the inside steamed to make
sure it's completely cleansed out.

OK. Fantastic, isn't it?
Yeah, it's gorgeous.

Nice restoration job on this.

I can certainly take this job on,
no problem. And no problem

at all as Gemma starts by giving
the butter churn

a good old soapy wash.

And as it dries, she can tackle the
first of the ten potato crates

which are covered in more than
dirt and grime.

Right, got most of the dust off.
There's still loads of poo left.

Simon? Yes? Here you go - for you.

It's a dirty job, Simon,

but someone has to do it.

Back in Oxford and the enamel sign
has come up a treat. Mate,

that's dried off lovely, hasn't it?

That is beautiful.

All it needs is a coat of wax

to seal the exposed parts
to stop the rust coming back...

What do you reckon? Yeah,
much better.

...before a game of buffering
table tennis.

To me, to you, to me, to you.

Some people would think,
"Oh, that's awful - it's all rusty.

"You've got to deal with that."

No! You can buy modern replicas
that are in perfect condition

or slightly tatty ones,
where you know it's the real deal.

Back in the fresh air and it's back
to the oak chest

which is now sanded and ready
for painting.

Henry chose these colours and
I think it looks quite nice.

Not sure I agree, Guy.

When this is waxed, I think it's
going to look really lovely.

I think we've rescued something
from an absolute wreck.

Back in Liverpool,

the now woodworm-and-bird-poo-free
crates are ready to paint.

I've primed them beforehand

and I'm using this interior

wood paint over the top.

Simon's plan is to assemble the
once perfectly stackable crates

in an alternative fashion
to create a TV stand.

That means a lot of screwing...

OK, yeah. I can see it.
See what I mean? Yeah.

A much simpler job for Gemma
is finishing the butter churn,

where she simply needs to repaint
the iron fittings and then seal

the wood with varnish.

I'm going to be painting this
in black and green

and keep it quite classic looking.

In Oxfordshire, Henry's turning his
attention back to his first finds.

The lamp is out of action,

but at least the tractor is running
like a dream.

Here.

There you are - engage neutral.

What do you reckon? I tell you what
- that steering's iffy.

I wouldn't like to do 30mph
with this steering rack.

I'll tell you what we should do, is
see how much it can actually haul.

It's probably quite torquey.

That's good.

Mate, I promise you it's going
to be worth it. You reckon?

For sure! I hope so,
this is killing me!

Henry's off to meet a potential
buyer for his local

newly refurbished garden tractor -

local farmer Patrick Edwards.

Stops with ease, Patrick,
I tell you, mate.

Henry, what have you got here?

I could do nothing with that at all.

Are you sure? Bring me something
useful. Is that a definite no?

A definite no.

Huh.

Wasted journey. Yeah.

In Liverpool, back to Simon's
first items -

the Spectrola lamp has been rewired

by a qualified electrician.

OK, Neil. It looks good.

But does it work?
Shall we have a go? Go ahead.

Mate!

Those mirrors kick the light out.

Yeah.

Mate - top job, as usual.

The Spectrola's back
to its former glory,

but what about the log burner?

This is a fabulous piece now.

It is. With a little bit
of elbow grease -

a LOT of elbow grease from Gemma -

it comes up great, doesn't it?

Yeah! Great job, Gemma.

Gemma's already put the log burner
on an internet auction.

Time to check out how it's going.

OK, so it looks like
we've had a sale.

Brilliant!

£210.

But was it a good deal?

Time to find out at the valuation.

Simon chose to help Scirard
Lancelyn-Green,

who's come back to check if
the items from his barns

will make a profit.

Hello!

Hello.

Good to see you, thanks for coming!

Lovely to see you again, Scirard.

Feast your eyes.

Well!

I think the piece de resistance
is up there.

Ay, yes - of course. Excellent.

You see the dapples on the floor. Yes.

Oh, you can get the effect now.

Oh, yeah - look at that. Reflections
going in different places. I love
that thing, it's gorgeous.

Yes. Scirard, I'm not so happy with
mine. Oh, dear. That lamp...

We got it tested

and there was asbestos round
the carcass of it,

so it's bagged up with a sticker
on it

to make sure no-one goes near it.

Oh, dear me. So forgive me,
Scirard -

it's beyond my control,
as they say.

So, that said... Have we made you
any money?

Well, to work that out,

we're now joined by Adam -
Adam, come on.

In you come.

Independent valuer Adam Partridge
runs a successful chain

of auction house specialising

in everything from fine art
to pop memorabilia.

Will you please, Adam, feast your
eyes on, to my mind,

an ascetically stunning
agricultural implement?

You don't really believe that,
Henry!

Do you know what? I do, actually!

It's rare to find a mower that
doesn't have a mower on it!

But you could have fun with it,

driving it round, couldn't you?

It just took some cleaning and
tinkering, costing nothing

to get the run-down tractor
running reliably once more.

Has an engine and some tyres

and a scrap value of sorts
as well, doesn't it?

Hey! Ooh! That's... I'll say £100.

OK, great.

So that's £100 to you.

Good start, that's all right,
isn't it?

So the tractor has driven off

with a profit of £100.

That lamp probably is one
I'd like to forget, actually.

Yeah, like what you've done with
that - plastic bag and a sticker!

Yeah, that's the whole vibe, mate.

Just ascetically, it's a sort of
antique movie kind of look.

Now, THAT is Hollywood.

The lamp may have been
pure Hollywood,

but the highly toxic asbestos seal

has turned it into a write-off.

I thought you thought asbestos
was a Greek island!

Hey-hey! I like that, that's funny.

That's funny. Give him that.

If that didn't have the asbestos issue

and we did it up, how much
would that be worth?

I should think in the sort of
£200-300 bracket.

Right. Well, there you go -

it was 680 quid to sort out the
asbestos... It's a lot of money.

I think people should be acutely
aware of the dangers that CAN be

hidden in an innocuous-looking
old objects.

So unfortunately, the lamp

can't be sold,

so produces no profit whatsoever.

Very nice, yes. Cast-iron Norwegian
stove. You see them

from time to time -
they come up at auction.

You see them in retail environments,

so it's a fairly easy thing to value.

Just £5 went on iron paste for the
neglected Scandinavian log burner,

to get it back to looking its best.

It's somewhere around £200.

I'm going to be a little bit more generous

and put two and a quarter, 225.

OK. Well, sold it for £210.

Happy to take that?
Sounds all right, yes. Brilliant.

So that's a red-hot profit of £205.

Let's take our eyes upwards

to the one-off, beautiful

Spectrola dancehall light.

The rusty old lamp has been
brought back to life

for £100 worth of repairs
and new mirrors.

Yeah, I think you've done a great
job. It's a very hard thing to price

because there's not really anything
to compare to.

Yep. So I've come up with £375.

Scirard, what do you think about
that? I think that's very good.

I do. You couldn't make it for that. No.

So that's a shining profit of £275.

All in all,

taking home £580 towards
your roof repairs.

How's that?
That's very helpful.

Brilliant. Absolutely fantastic,
mate. Thank you very much.

So Simon's choice of location,

the barns belonging to

Scirard Lancelyn-Green

has made a tidy profit of £580.

But can Henry's location do better
than this?

SCIRARD: It's very nice to see
equipment brought back into use

and certainly a useful addition
to the funds.

Coming up...

Do you reckon it's worked?

...Simon's utterly butterly magic.

How cool's that?

It's the moment of truth
for Henry...

Big money, son. Good.

Big money for a full board.

And at the valuation...

What do you reckon, then?

Er, I'm astonished. I really am.

The kings of clutter, Henry Cole
and Simon O'Brien, are on a mission

to turn junk into pots of cash.

Come on! I'm stuck!

Today's first location, chosen
by Simon,

made Scirard Lancelyn Green
a profit of...

So, can Henry's choice of rummage
spot - the sheds belonging

to John Appleby - do any better?

You're definitely going
to get some money there.

First item for me. I love that.

In Oxfordshire, Henry is casting a
final eye over the enamel sign.

That is a transformation. That's
beautiful, from what it was.

I'm loving it. Big money, son.

Yeah, good. Big money for a floorboard.

That enamel, sort of mid to dark
blue is a beautiful colour.

It's on to colours of a different
sort for the oak dresser.

It was literally rotting away,

but it's now back to its
former glory,

although the pumpkin-coloured
detailing is less than original.

Do you know what?
I think that is beautiful.

I think it's lovely, yeah.
The things you can do with wood, eh?

Hey, Simon O'Brien, eat your
heart out. I'll make you a cup of
tea. Come on.

Back in Liverpool, the vintage
butter churn is
looking as good as new,

now it's been waxed and given
a smart new coat of paint.

This looks fantastic, doesn't it?
Looks really good, doesn't it?

Yeah. And also... Yep?

...I've been experimenting
whether it works. Does it work?

Well, I put some milk in it
about an hour ago,

and I've been just standing
here, churning away.

Yeah. We'll find out.

So, churning butter... I think
there's more to it than that.
I don't think so.

Here you are, grab that.

Oh, yeah.

Look, how's that?

So, that butter churn has made that
butter?

Yeah. Yeah.

See? Not only does it look
beautiful, it works.

Brilliant.

Well, it must be magic.

Well, let's hope it reaches
a magic price.

Back inside,

Gemma is giving the newly assembled
potato crate shelving system a light

sanding to give it that classic
shabby-chic distressed look.

That looks really good. I wasn't
sure if that was going to work,

but it's really lifted the wood,

and it's got that rustic charm
I was after.

Hope Simon likes it.

Oh, there we go. Yeah? Yeah.

It's cool, isn't it? Yeah.

What did that cost us?

Bit of paint.

And a bit of imagination. So,
everything in there... is profit.

Brilliant.

In Oxfordshire, Henry has already
found a potential buyer for

the restored and painted oak dresser.

It's very, er, pumpkin inside,
isn't it?

If you can deliver it for 125,

then we've got a deal. 125 quid?

All right. All right, then.

Henry's bagged some cash,
but did he get a good deal?

Time to find out, as John Appleby

has arrived for the valuation of
the items picked from his farm.

Come on in, mate.

Hello. Hi, John, how are you?
Good to see you, man.

THEY TALK OVER ONE ANOTHER

Well, now, then.

Have a look, mate.

What have you done? Go and have a
look. What have you done?

THEY LAUGH
I'm glad he's looking at you!

That is fabulous.

I think it's come up nice, mate.

Check out the cupboard.

Wow!
HE LAUGHS

Now, that's a funky scheme, that is,
isn't it? Yeah, it is, isn't it?

That's great.

Oh, I can't believe this.

That's unbelievable.

It's fully functioning.

We've even cleaned it inside,
so it's sterile and good to go.

And those are the potato boxes?

Yeah.

It's just daft, isn't it?
It is daft... but it works.

There you go, mate. Come back and
join us. Yeah. Come on over.

What do you reckon, then? Overall.
It's fabulous, what you've done.

Oh, mate. Well, look,
I'm thrilled you're happy.

But, well, have we
made you any money?

Here he comes.

Now, then, you gotta be nice to him.
He's called Adam.

Independent valuer Adam Partridge is
back to cast his eye over,
and put a price on,

the latest collection of restorations.

Let's take him down to the beach
to cheer him up. Come on.

You want to start with that?

It does have a seaside feel to it,
doesn't it? Books and CDs...

All kinds of things on there, shell
collections and things.

So, £100? £100? Yeah. I'm smiling.

You're not complaining, are you?
No, not at all.

Literally, another couple of weeks,
firewood. Yeah.

There were some costs associated,
but only 20 quid.

And, furthermore, I've sold them
for 100 quid, mate.

So, we're on the money
on the valuation, and you're taking
home 80 quid

from some old potato crates.
How's that, fella? Fantastic.
There you go.

So, that's an £80 profit
for the potato crates

that were otherwise destined
for the dump.

Look at that beautiful old butter
churn there. Isn't it gorgeous?

Nice job. We see a lot of them
through the auctions over the years,

and they're often in poor condition.

Wormy, rusty, that sort of thing.

So, I think you've brought back
the brassware nicely,
the paint's sensitive.

I'm going to give you a nice price,
how about that?

OK, go on. Yeah, £250.

I think that's worth a bit more. Do
you? Good lad.

You put that in a chichi little
auction house...

You'll get £300 for that.

I've got three auction houses,
but none of them are chichi.
THEY LAUGH

INDISTINCT

250 we'll settle on.

The discarded butter churn has
been brought back to life

with just £20 spent on polish
and paint, delivering a profit of...

Right, Adam, let's talk cupboard...

Yeah, well...
...in nice pumpkin orange.

Well, you've repurposed something
that was probably rotting away.

Yep. It is a nice piece of Georgian
oak dating to, what, 1800 or so?

The battered dresser is back from
the brink,

thanks to £50 on fittings, wood
treatment and cornicing.

I'm not...100% on the colour,
myself, but that's a
personal taste issue.

100, 120, that sort of thing?
Well, I've flogged it for 125.

If you've flogged it for that,
you've done well, haven't you?

So, that's a profit of...

OK. Well, look, the final item is
the enamel sign.

We see loads of advertising signs
coming through the auctions.

Enamel ones, automotive ones are
particularly valuable.

It just took some elbow grease

to bring the neglected sign
back to life.

One like that, I would expect these
days to have a price tag

of about £175 or thereabouts.

So, that's £175 of profit
for the old tobacco sign.

So, John... Happy?
Very much so, yeah.

Really impressed
with what you've done.

Well, hopefully this will make you
happier - you're taking home,

after our costs, 560 quid. Wow.

So, Henry's choice of location has
netted £560 for John's charity.

Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant,
mate. Thank you very much.

And thank you, Adam.
That's a pleasure.

For once, he's come up smiling,
hasn't he? Yeah.

I didn't know whether they were
going to make anything out
of those things,

and they've just come
up fantastically well.

Simon's choice of rummage spot,
Scirard's house,

pulled in £580, which means Simon's
made £20 more profit than Henry.

If you'd made just
£20 more effort

with your stuff,
you might've drawn.

But you didn't.
So you lost, by two £10 notes.

Ha!

Hang on.

Can we call it a draw? I forgot a
couple of...

Would you take a credit card? No!

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