Father Knows Best (1954–1960): Season 2, Episode 12 - Bud, the Ladykiller - full transcript

ROBERT YOUNG...

AND JANE WYATT.

WITH ELINOR DONAHUE, BILLY
GRAY, AND LAUREN CHAPIN...

CHILDREN!

YOUR BREAKFAST IS
WAITING AND IT'S LATE!

BETTY!

Betty: I'M HURRYING AS
FAST AS I CAN, MOTHER!

KATHY?

Kathy: I'VE GOT MY
SHOES ON WRONG!

BUD?

Bud: OKAY, OKAY!



Betty: JAMIE MILLER...
SHE SAID SHE'D CALL!

I'LL GET IT! I'LL GET IT!

HELLO?

WHOM DID YOU SAY YOU WANTED?

JAMES ANDERSON, JR.?

OH, YOU MUST MEAN BUD.

JUST A MINUTE. HE'S RIGHT HERE.

JAMES, JR.? IT'S FOR YOU, BUD.

I DON'T KNOW ANYBODY THAT KNOWS
ME BY THAT NAME. ASK WHO IT IS.

SHE SAYS HER NAME IS DORA.

OH, NO. NOT DUMB DORA.

SHE MUST BE IF
SHE'S CALLING YOU.

MOM, PLEASE, I DON'T
WANT TO TALK TO HER.

TELL HER I'M NOT HERE.



BUT I'VE ALREADY TOLD
HER YOU WERE RIGHT HERE.

WELL, TELL HER
YOU MADE A MISTAKE.

TELL HER YOU THOUGHT
I WAS SOMEBODY ELSE.

PLEASE, MOM! IF YOU
LOVE ME, YOU'LL DO IT.

THIS IS PERFECTLY RIDICULOUS.

WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?
DO I HAVE TO SIT ALL ALONE

WITH FOUR BOWLS OF OATMEAL
STARING ME IN THE FACE?

TAKE THAT PHONE. YOU TWO,
COME ON AND EAT YOUR BREAKFAST.

COME ON.

WHAT?

JAMES?

THIS IS DORA.

YOU KNOW... DORA FENWAY.

LOOKIT, DON'T CALL ME JAMES.

WHAT DO YOU WANT?

I JUST THOUGHT MAYBE I'D ASK YOU

IF YOU HAD ANY TROUBLE WITH
YOUR MATH EQUATIONS FOR TODAY.

I WAS THINKING OF YOU.

YOU KNOW, I DREAMED
ABOUT YOU LAST NIGHT.

MAYBE IT WAS SOMETHING YOU ATE.

LOOK, I GOTTA GO EAT. BYE.

WHAT DID SHE WANT?

WHO ASKED YOU TO
ASK ME QUESTIONS?

BUD, EAT YOUR BREAKFAST.

I LOST MY APPETITE.

WHO'S DUMB DORA?

WHAT?

I DON'T LIKE THE
EXPRESSION "DUMB DORA".

CHILDREN.

WELL, WHO IS DUMB
DORA? I MEAN...

DOES MY LIFE HAVE
TO BE AN OPEN BOOK?

BUD, I DIDN'T REALIZE
I WAS INTRUDING

INTO YOUR PRIVATE LIFE.

WHY DOES EVERYBODY HAVE TO
MAKE A FEDERAL CASE OUT OF IT?

I GET ONE CRAZY PHONE CALL,
AND EVERYBODY POUNCES ON ME.

NO ONE'S POUNCING ON YOU, BUD.

BUD, IF DORA'S A
GIRLFRIEND OF YOURS...

WHO SAID SHE'S A
GIRLFRIEND OF MINE?

SHE ISN'T EVEN A GIRL.

IS SHE A BOY?

KATHY, YOU'RE NOT EATING.

YOU ALWAYS TELL ME NOT
TO EAT WHILE I'M TALKING.

YOUR MOTHER TELLS YOU NOT TO
TALK WHILE YOU'RE EATING, SO EAT.

IN OTHER WORDS, BE QUIET.

WHO'S DORA? WHO'S
DORA? WHO'S DORA?

SHE'S A PEST, LIKE
SOMEBODY ELSE AROUND HERE.

I'M TELLING YOU, BUD,

THAT DORA DIDN'T TAKE
HER EYES OFF YOU ONCE

DURING MATH CLASS.

OKAY, SO YOU'RE TELLING
ME. WHO ASKED YOU?

WHAT'S THAT?

HEY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

FLOWERS IN YOUR LOCKER?!

I TOLD YOU YOU'D BETTER
FIND THE KEY TO YOUR LOCKER.

NEXT TIME YOU'LL FIND OLD
DORA IN THERE WAITING FOR YOU.

IS THAT FROM HER? WHAT'S IT SAY?

LISTEN. "DEAR, JAMES..."

GET THAT "JAMES" BIT.

I'M WARNING YOU, CLAUDE.

"I'M SORRY IF I ANNOYED YOU

BY PHONING THIS MORNING."

CUT IT OUT, CLAUDE!
LET HIM READ IT.

"BUT I GUESS YOU KNOW
HOW I FEEL ABOUT YOU."

WHOO-WHOO!

"I PICKED THIS FLOWER FOR YOU

ON MY WAY TO
SCHOOL. DORA FENWAY."

BUD THE LADIES' MAN!

CARDS AND FLOWERS!

YOU GUYS THINK YOU'RE
REAL COMEDIANS, DON'T YOU?

WELL, GO AHEAD AND JOKE!

JAMES.

SHE LOVES ME, SHE LOVES ME NOT.

BUD, WHY AREN'T YOU
OUT WITH CLAUDE AND JOE?

IT'S SUCH A BEAUTIFUL
SATURDAY AFTERNOON.

BECAUSE.

HE WOULDN'T DARE GO
OUT IN THE STREET ALONE.

THE WOMEN WOULD MOB HIM. BETTY.

BOY, IS SHE A RIOT.

SHE OUGHT TO BE ON
TELEVISION, SHE'S SUCH A RIOT.

THEY CAN CALL HER
"OLD MAID FUNNYBONES".

OH, WHAT A BEAUTIFUL DAY.

I'LL ANSWER IT.

HELLO.

IS JAMES HOME? HMM?

I'M DORA FENWAY.

OH, SO YOU'RE DORA.

I JUST WANTED TO
LEAVE THIS BOOK. IT'S HIS.

I'M BUD'S FATHER.
WON'T YOU COME IN?

I JUST WANTED TO LEAVE THE BOOK.

BUD, YOU HAVE COMPANY.

I FORGOT. I GOTTA MEET SOMEBODY.

BUD.

I ONLY CAME TO RETURN THIS BOOK.

IT GOT MIXED UP WITH
MINE IN THE CORRIDOR.

THANKS.

BUD, I DON'T BELIEVE
DORA'S MET YOUR FAMILY YET.

MY FAMILY.

I'M BUD'S MOTHER.

THIS IS BETTY AND KATHY.

EVERYBODY, THIS IS
DORA... FENWAY, ISN'T IT?

YES. HELLO.

I'M VERY HAPPY TO MEET YOU.

WON'T YOU SIT DOWN, DORA?

I DIDN'T EXPECT TO STAY.

ANY FRIEND OF BUD'S
IS ALWAYS WELCOME.

PLEASE SIT DOWN. THAT IS,
UNLESS YOU'RE IN A HURRY.

OH. I'M NOT IN ANY HURRY.

THANK YOU.

ARE YOU BUD'S GIRLFRIEND?

KATHY. KATHY.

WHY DON'T YOU GO SOAK YOUR HEAD?

BUD!

UH, ARE YOU IN BUD'S
CLASS AT SCHOOL?

JUST HISTORY AND MATH CLASS.

OH.

WELL, HOW IS BUD IN MATH?

OH, HE'S BEAUTIFUL.

I MEAN, HE'S VERY GOOD.

I JUST LOVE YOUR DRESS, DORA.

IT'S SO PRETTY.

THANK YOU. MY MOTHER
MAKES ALL OF MY CLOTHES.

Margaret: I WISH I
WERE THAT TALENTED.

CAN I TRY ON YOUR GLASSES?

KATHY.

THAT'S ALL RIGHT.

I'M GOING.

Jim: BUD! WHAT?

YOU HAVE COMPANY.

WELL, WHO ASKED
HER TO COME HERE?!

ALL SHE DOES IS PESTER ME!

DORA, I'M SO
SORRY. REALLY, I AM.

BUD JUST ISN'T HIMSELF TODAY.

I GUESS... I GUESS I
SHOULDN'T HAVE COME.

OH, NONSENSE. WE'RE
SO HAPPY TO MEET YOU.

WE'D LIKE TO SEE
YOU AGAIN, DORA.

NOW, DON'T YOU FORGET, DORA...

WE'D BE VERY HAPPY TO HAVE
YOU DROP IN ON US AT ANY TIME.

PLEASE DO.

I'M GOING TO HAVE A LITTLE
TALK WITH THAT SON OF YOURS.

HMM. YOU ALWAYS GIVE HIM
BACK TO ME AT TIMES LIKE THIS.

YOU INSULTED AND EMBARRASSED
THAT POOR GIRL TO TEARS!

NOBODY SEEMS TO
THINK ABOUT MY FEELINGS.

THAT'S NOT TRUE, BUD.

BUT I'M AFRAID
NOTHING YOU CAN SAY

COULD POSSIBLY
EXCUSE YOUR ACTIONS.

DAD, YOU JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND.

THERE'S ONE THING
I DO UNDERSTAND,

AND THAT'S DECENCY
AND GOOD MANNERS...

AND A REGARD FOR
OTHER PEOPLE'S FEELINGS.

DORA WAS A GUEST IN YOUR HOME,

AND SHE WAS ENTITLED TO RESPECT.

IF SHE HAD ANY RESPECT FOR ME,

SHE WOULDN'T EVEN
HAVE COME HERE.

THAT POOR GIRL HAS
A CRUSH ON YOU...

BLESS HER INNOCENT
LITTLE HEART...

AND YOU SHOULD
BE VERY FLATTERED.

FLATTERED?

ALL RIGHT. BUT YOU'VE DONE
A HORRIBLE THING TO DORA,

AND I WANT YOU TO APOLOGIZE.

OKAY, I APOLOGIZE.
THAT'S BETTER...

NOT TO ME. YOU'VE GOT
TO APOLOGIZE TO HER.

YOU MUST BE KIDDING!

I'M NOT KIDDING.

EVEN AT THAT, I DON'T
SEE HOW A MERE APOLOGY

COULD MAKE AMENDS FOR
YOUR INEXCUSABLE MANNERS.

WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO?

WELL, I CAN'T FORCE
YOU TO DO ANYTHING.

THAT'S UP TO YOU.

HOW ABOUT IT?

YOU KNOW, THIS
ISN'T GONNA BE EASY.

I KNOW.

I WISH I COULD
FIGURE OUT WHAT I DID

TO ATTRACT HER SO
VIOLENTLY IN THE FIRST PLACE.

WELL, IT'S PUZZLING, I'LL ADMIT.

HOW DO I DO IT?

YOU HAVE CHARM... USE IT.

JUST TELL DORA YOU'RE
SORRY FOR YOUR ACTIONS

AND TRY TO MAKE HER UNDERSTAND.

OKAY, I'LL GO SEE HER.

BUT DON'T FORGET... IT
WAS PROBABLY MY CHARM

THAT GOT ME INTO
THIS IN THE FIRST PLACE.

YOU'RE GONNA HAVE
TO LIVE WITH IT, SON.

TRY TO LEARN TO CONTROL IT.

YOU'RE 14 YEARS OLD, DORA.

BY NOW YOU SHOULD KNOW
YOU CAN'T CHASE A MAN.

ESPECIALLY A MAN LIKE JAMES.

NO WONDER HE TREATS
YOU LIKE AN OLD DOORMAT.

SERVES YOU RIGHT.

WELL, IT'S GOT TO STOP.

YOU'RE JUST GOING TO
HAVE TO CLOSE YOUR EYES

TO HIS CHARM AND...
AND FASCINATION.

STARTING RIGHT NOW.

HELLO, DORA. I JUST
THOUGHT I'D DROP BY AND, UH...

I HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY
TO YOU, JAMES ANDERSON, JR.

IF I HAVE EMBARRASSED YOU LATELY

WITH MY UNWANTED
ATTENTION, I'M VERY SORRY.

HOWEVER, I FEEL THAT
YOU HAVE HUMILIATED ME

FAR MORE THAN I DESERVE.

THEREFORE, YOU MAY CONSIDER
OUR FRIENDSHIP AT AN END.

I COULD'VE LOST MY NOSE,

THE WAY SHE SLAMMED THAT DOOR.

WHAT HAPPENED TO
THE ANDERSON CHARM?

THERE WASN'T ANY TIME TO USE IT.

SHE TOLD ME OFF, AND THEN WHAM!

I'M BEGINNING TO THINK
THIS DORA'S QUITE A GIRL.

WELL, YOU DID YOUR PART, BUD.

YOU TRIED YOUR BEST,
AND I'M PROUD OF YOU.

COME TO THINK OF IT,

ME GOING OVER THERE WAS
A PRETTY GOOD IDEA. OH?

NOW THAT SHE'S MAD AT ME,
MAYBE SHE'LL LEAVE ME ALONE.

BUT YOU DON'T WANT
HER MAD AT YOU.

I DON'T?

I JUST THINK IT WOULD BE BETTER

IF YOU WERE FRIENDS.

AFTER ALL, BUD, YOU'RE
GONNA HAVE TO LEARN

TO GET ALONG WITH PEOPLE.

I THINK YOUR
FATHER'S RIGHT, SON.

GOSH, MOM, A MINUTE
AGO, YOU WERE ON MY SIDE.

I STILL AM. BUT YOU'RE
FATHER'S TRYING TO SHOW YOU

THAT IT'S BETTER TO HAVE
A FRIEND THAN AN ENEMY.

THERE'S NO USE GOING BACK NOW,

'CAUSE THAT DOOR WOULDN'T
STAND ANOTHER APOLOGY.

I'M AFRAID THE TIME FOR AN
APOLOGY HAS PASSED, BUD.

THIS CALLS FOR ACTION.

THERE MUST BE SOMETHING
YOU COULD DO FOR THIS GIRL

THAT WOULD MEAN SOMETHING.

YOU COULD GIVE A NEW DOOR.

BETTY, YOU'RE A GIRL. WHAT
DO YOU THINK BUD COULD DO

THAT WOULD GET HIM BACK
IN DORA'S GOOD GRACES?

HE COULD ASK HER
TO THE JUNIOR PROM.

WHAT?!

I'M NOT GONNA TAKE
DORA TO THE PROM.

I'M GONNA ASK APRIL ADAMS.

OH, THERE'LL BE A MILLION
BOYS WHO'S ASK HER.

WELL, IT JUST HAPPENS
THAT I HAPPEN TO BE

THE ONE IN A MILLION
THAT SHE PREFERS.

WOULD YOU MIND SO MUCH, BUD?

I THINK ASKING DORA TO THE
DANCE WOULD BE SO NICE OF YOU.

JUST THINK, BUD... WITH
THIS ONE SMALL GESTURE,

YOU COULD MAKE THIS GIRL
HAPPY, AND AT THE SAME TIME

KNOW THAT YOU'RE ACTING
LIKE A MAN WITH HONOR.

WAIT JUST A MINUTE.

YOU SHOULD BE GLAD
YOU'RE GETTING OFF SO EASY.

YEARS AGO, YOU'D HAVE
HAD TO FIGHT A DUEL

TO SAVE THE LADY'S HONOR.
WOULDN'T HE, FATHER?

DON'T LOOK AT ME. I
NEVER HAD TO FIGHT A DUEL.

IF I CAN'T GET IN TO APOLOGIZE,

HOW CAN I GET IN TO
INVITE HER TO THE DANCE?

PUT YOUR FOOT IN THE DOOR.

SURE, AND HOBBLE AROUND HERE
ON ONE FOOT ALL SUMMER LONG?

HOW ABOUT IT,
BUD? WILL YOU DO IT?

WELL... IF I INVITE
DORA TO THE PROM,

WILL YOU ALL PROMISE NEVER TO
MENTION HER NAME TO ME AGAIN?

CROSS MY HEART.

I PROMISE.

WE'LL CONSIDER THE
SLATE WIPED CLEAN.

OKAY.

MAYBE SHE WON'T WANT TO GO.

MAYBE SHE DOESN'T LIKE TO DANCE.

MAYBE...

OKAY.

UH, I HAVE A MESSAGE
FROM MY FATHER TO YOU.

OH?

IT'S PRETTY PERSONAL.

MAYBE I'D BETTER
COME IN AND TELL YOU.

VERY WELL.

AS LONG AS YOUR FATHER SENT YOU.

MOTHER'S NOT AT HOME,

BUT YOU MAY SIT DOWN
FOR A FEW MINUTES.

THANKS.

WELL?

UH... I OWE YOU AN
APOLOGY, AND I'M SORRY.

IS THAT THE MESSAGE
FROM YOUR FATHER?

WELL, THAT'S PART OF IT.

THAT WAS VERY NICE OF
YOUR FATHER TO THINK OF ME.

HE'S A PRETTY GOOD
THINKER-UPPER.

HE'S VERY CHARMING, TOO.

YEAH. PEOPLE SAY I
SORT OF TAKE AFTER HIM.

THEY DO? THAT'S WHAT PEOPLE SAY.

WHAT IS THE REST OF
YOUR FATHER'S MESSAGE?

WELL...

WHAT'S THAT?

I'M INTERESTED IN ENTOMOLOGY.

THAT'S THE STUDY OF INSECTS.

OH.

YOU KNOW... ANTS,
BEES, BUTTERFLIES.

OH, BUGS!

THIS IS A DANAUS ARCHIPUS.

WELL, HOW ABOUT THAT?

IF YOU'RE REALLY INTERESTED,
I'LL GET MY COLLECTION

OF HEMIPTERA, COLEOPTERA,
AND HYMENOPTERA.

NO, I... I GUESS I'M
NOT THAT INTERESTED.

THEN THERE REALLY ISN'T ANY
REASON FOR YOU TO STAY ANY LONGER.

DORA... YES?

WOULD YOU LIKE TO GO TO...

OR, UH... ARE WE FRIENDS NOW?

I'M SORRY. I FEEL
THERE'S NOTHING FRIENDLY

ABOUT OUR FRIENDSHIP.

OH.

WELL, IN THAT CASE, I
GUESS I'LL HAVE TO ASK YOU...

YOU WOULDN'T WANT TO GO TO THE
JUNIOR PROM WITH ME, WOULD YOU?

YOU... WANT TO TAKE
ME TO THE JUNIOR PROM?

WELL, IT'S PROBABLY BE
AWFUL CROWDED IN THERE.

I LOVE CROWDS.

IT GETS PRETTY HOT IN
THAT GYMNASIUM, TOO.

I WOULDN'T MIND IT.

YOU WOULDN'T?

I WOULD DEARLY LOVE TO
GO TO THE PROM WITH YOU.

OKAY.

BUD... YOU DO LIKE ME AFTER ALL.

HEY! HEY, CUT IT OUT!
YOU CAN'T DO THAT!

YOU JUST MADE ME THE HAPPIEST
GIRL IN THE WHOLE WORLD.

I GO OVER THERE TO
ASK HER TO A DANCE

AND WIND UP PRACTICALLY MARRIED.

OH, BUD.

DOES SHE KNOW HOW
MUCH ALLOWANCE YOU GET?

OKAY, ALL OF YOU, BE FUNNY.

BUT IF YOU KNEW WHAT SHE DID...

WHAT? WHAT? WHAT?

WELL, IT WOULDN'T
BE HONORABLE TO...

TO WHAT? TO WHAT? TO WHAT?

WELL, TO BE KISSED AND TELL.

SHE KISSED YOU?

UH-HUH.

WHY?

'CAUSE SHE'S CRAZY ABOUT ME.

GO ON. THEN WHAT HAPPENED?

ISN'T THAT ENOUGH? DO YOU
REALIZE THAT YOUR ONLY SON

IS APT TO BE MARRIED BEFORE HE'S
EVEN HAD A CHANCE TO BE A BACHELOR?

BUD'S RIGHT. IF HE
TAKES HER TO THE DANCE,

HE'LL ONLY GET IN DEEPER.

YOU DON'T WANT ME TO
LEAD HER ON, DO YOU?

I'M THINKING, I'M THINKING.

MAYBE I'D BE BETTER OFF IF
YOU DIDN'T THINK QUITE SO MUCH.

WE'VE GOT TO FIND A SOLUTION
THAT WON'T HURT DORA

AND THAT WILL HELP YOU.

NOW YOU'RE TALKIN'.

LET ME SEE.

I'VE GOT IT. WHEN I WAS IN
SCHOOL STUDYING PSYCHOLOGY,

WE LEARNED ABOUT SOMETHING
KNOWN AS A SUBSTITUTE SYMBOL.

ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS COME UP
WITH ANOTHER BOYFRIEND FOR DORA,

SOMEONE TO SUBSTITUTE FOR YOU.

THAT'LL SOLVE EVERYTHING.

VERY CLEVER, DAD. VERY CLEVER.

DORA'S BEEN LOOKING FOR
A BOYFRIEND ALL HER LIFE,

AND I'M SUPPOSED TO COME
UP WITH ONE OVERNIGHT, HUH?

THAT'S RIGHT.

AND I'LL TELL YOU HOW TO DO IT.

HERE COMES THE
LADYKILLER OF SPRINGFIELD.

GOOD MORNING, ROMEO.

GOOD MORNING, CLAUDE, JOE.

YOU GOT A NAIL FILE?

SURE.

♪ I DREAM OF DORA ♪

♪ WITH THE LIGHT BROWN HAIR ♪

♪ BORNE LIKE A FEATHER
ON THE LIGHT SUMMER AIR... ♪

HE'S FLIPPED!

♪ OH, DORA WITH THE
LIGHT BROWN HAIR ♪

HEY, CARUSO, JUST A MINUTE.

WHAT'S UP? SATURDAY YOU
WERE BREAKING YOUR NECK

TO GET AWAY FROM DORA.

NOW ALL OF A SUDDEN YOU'RE
SINGING BALLADS ABOUT HER.

FELLAS, AN AWFUL LOT HAS
HAPPENED TO ME SINCE THEN?

YEAH?

TELL ME, WHEN YOU LOOK AT DORA,

WHAT DO YOU SEE?

NOTHIN'. ME, NEITHER.

NEITHER DID I UNTIL SATURDAY.

AND THEN I DISCOVERED SOMETHING.

THIS IS A GIRL WHOSE QUIET
EXTERIOR IS MISLEADING.

BENEATH IT ALL THERE
BEATS A HEART OF FIRE.

SHE'S EXCITING, MYSTERIOUS.

HER EYES ARE LIKE
LIMP POOLS OF... OF INK.

HER VOICE IS AS SOFT
AS AN ANGEL'S FOOTSTEPS.

DORA?

AND ANOTHER THING...
SHE'S GOT A MIND.

SHE CAN TALK ABOUT
ANYTHING. BASEBALL?

SHE KNOWS EVERY PITCHER
THAT EVER THREW A BALL.

I GUESS YOU JUST NEVER
KNOW ABOUT PEOPLE, HUH?

AND ANOTHER THING, YOU
SHOULD SEE HER COLLECTION

OF HEMIPTERA AND COLEOPTERA.

WELL, FELLAS, I GOTTA BE GOING.

I PROMISED DORA I'D
MEET HER BEFORE CLASS.

UH, SHE'S COMING
DOWN THE HALL NOW, BUD.

KNOWS ALL ABOUT BASEBALL, HUH?

WE'D BETTER HURRY UP,
DORA, OR WE'LL BE LATE.

SAY, DORA... WE WERE
JUST HAVING AN ARGUMENT

ABOUT, UH, DUKE
SNIDER'S BATTING AVERAGE.

IT WAS .341 LAST WEEK.

HUH?

COME ON, DORA. WE'LL BE LATE.

AND SHE COLLECTS HEMIPTERA, TOO.

YEAH. WHAT'S THAT, HORACE?

HEMIPTERA IS A
ZOOLOGICAL CLASSIFICATION

OF THE ORDER OF INSECTS,

WHICH INCLUDES TRUE
BUGS, CICADAS, APHIDES,

AND SCALE INSECTS.

THE NAME WAS FIRST
GIVEN BY LINNAEUS IN 1735

WHO APPLIED IT IN AN ALLUSION
TO THE HALF-CORIACEOUS.

I WISH YOU COULD GET BUD TO DO
THE JOB FOR ME HE DID FOR DORA.

YEAH? IT REALLY WORKED, HUH?

IT CERTAINLY DID. EVERY
BOY IN SCHOOL IS AFTER DORA.

OH, MY GOSH! IT'S
DORA... SHE'S HERE AGAIN!

I JUST SAW HER
COMING UP THE WALK.

BETTY JUST SAID EVERY
BOY IN SCHOOL IS AFTER HER.

YEAH, BUT SHE WON'T
GIVE ANY OF THEM A TUMBLE.

SHE WANTS ME. SHE DOES?

IT'S AGGRAVATING, ISN'T IT?

IT'S PUZZLING, ALL RIGHT.

THERE SHE IS.

I CAN'T WATCH ONE OF MY OWN SEX

THROWING HERSELF AT
YOUR FEET. I'M LEAVING.

WELL, FINE SISTER YOU ARE.

DAD, DO SOMETHING, ANYTHING.

YOU'RE THE ONE THAT MADE
ME ASK HER TO THE DANCE,

AND I JUST CAN'T TAKE
HER. APRIL SAYS IF I DO,

SHE'LL NEVER SPEAK TO ME AGAIN.

Margaret: EVERYONE'S
OUT HERE, DORA.

HELLO, DORA. NICE
TO SEE YOU AGAIN.

HELLO, MR. ANDERSON.

WON'T YOU SIT DOWN, DORA?

NO, THANK YOU. I
CAN'T STAY LONG.

I CAME TO SEE BUD. IS HE HERE?

UH... NOT AT THE MOMENT.

IT'S KIND OF HARD TO
KEEP TRACK OF BUD.

HE'S IN AND OUT SO QUICKLY.

OH.

IS THERE A MESSAGE
I CAN GIVE HIM?

WELL, YES, THERE IS.

I WOULD RATHER TELL HIM,

BUT I'M SURE I CAN TALK TO YOU.

YOU SEE, I... I KNOW BUD DOESN'T
WANT TO TAKE ME TO THE JUNIOR PROM.

Jim: OF COURSE HE DOES, DORA.

Margaret: HE WOULDN'T
HAVE ASKED YOU.

YES, HE WOULD. I REALIZE NOW

THAT BUD ONLY ASKED ME BECAUSE
HE DIDN'T WANT TO HURT MY FEELINGS.

YOU SEE, BUD IS A GENTLEMAN.

HE'S ALWAYS NICE TO PEOPLE,

CONSIDERATE OF THEIR FEELINGS.

HE WOULDN'T HURT ANYONE.

THAT'S WHY I LIKE HIM SO MUCH.

LOOK HOW WONDERFUL
HE'S BEEN AT SCHOOL.

HE'S MADE EVERYBODY LIKE ME.

I'VE NEVER BEEN SO HAPPY.

NO ONE COULD HELP
LIKING YOU, DORA.

BUD.

HI, DORA.

MOM, DAD...

WOULD YOU LEAVE US
ALONE FOR A MINUTE?

I WANT TO TALK TO DORA.

OF COURSE, BUD.

SURE THING, SON.

DORA...

WELL... I JUST WANTED
TO TELL YOU THAT...

WELL, I'M NOT ALL THOSE THINGS
YOU WERE SAYING ABOUT ME.

I'M A CAD, REALLY.

THAT'S NOT TRUE.

YES, I AM.

I... I DIDN'T WANT TO
TAKE YOU TO THE DANCE.

NOT AT FIRST.

BUT I DIDN'T KNOW YOU THEN.

AND NOW I DO.

DORA, I'D LIKE TO TAKE
YOU TO THE PROM, HONEST.

BUD, I WOULDN'T WANT TO HOLD YOU

TO A PROMISE YOU JUST
MADE TO BE HONORABLE.

BUT I WANT TO TAKE YOU.

I'M SORRY. BUT YOU SEE...

I HAVE A DATE FOR THE DANCE.

YOU HAVE A DATE?

YOU KNOW HORACE?

YEAH, I KNOW HIM. WHAT'S
HE GOT TO DO WITH IT?

THAT'S WHO I HAVE THE DATE WITH.

HORACE?

HORACE AND I HAVE DISCOVERED

THAT WE HAVE A
GREAT DEAL IN COMMON.

HORACE?

HE'S VERY CHARMING.

HORACE.

WHAT DO YOU DO FOR SHOCK?

HE'S WRITING A THEME ON
THE EARLY LIFE OF LINNAEUS.

HORACE IS VERY
INTELLECTUAL, YOU KNOW.

AND HIS THESIS... THE
FLIGHT OF THE BUTTERFLY...

WON THE SCIENCE MEDAL.

BUT WE CAN BE
FRIENDS, CAN'T WE, BUD?

SURE, I GUESS SO.

GOOD-BYE, BUD.

AND THANKS FOR EVERYTHING.

TELL YOUR PARENTS
GOOD-BYE FOR ME, WILL YOU?

YEAH.

DID YOU HEAR WHAT SHE SAID?

WELL, NO, BUD. WHAT'D SHE SAY?

GUESS WHO MY
SUBSTITUTE SYMBOL IS.

THAT PIPSQUEAK HORACE.

HORACE?

WELL, HORACE JUST
PROBABLY OUT-CHARMED YOU.

DORA FELL FOR IT.

BOY, HOW FICKLE CAN A WOMAN GET?

HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT?

HIS EGO IS ACTUALLY WOUNDED.

HEH. I DIDN'T THINK
BOYS WERE LIKE THAT.

I DIDN'T, EITHER. I
THOUGHT ONLY MEN WERE.

THAT SUN FEELS GOOD, DOESN'T IT?

IT SURE DOES.

I JUST HAVE TO GET
MY BACK TANNED

FOR MY NEW STRAPLESS
WHICH I HOPE TO GET.

HEH HEH!

BUD! COME HERE,
QUICK! ON DADDY'S FOOT!

Betty: WHAT IS IT?

DON'T MOVE, DAD! WHATEVER
YOU DO, DON'T MOVE!

IT'S A FORMICA SANGUINEA.

DON'T TOUCH IT, KATHY.

BUD, GET RID OF IT! HURRY UP!

DON'T WORRY, DAD.
IT'S ONLY AN ANT.

OH. AN ANT.

IT BELONGS TO THE
ORDER OF HYMENOPTERA.

THEY FORM THE
SUPERFAMILY FORMICOIDEA,

WHICH IS REGARDED AS THE
SINGLE FAMILY FORMICIDAE.

THAT INCLUDES
EIGHT SUB-FAMILIES.

WELL, IF IT HAS
SO MANY FAMILIES,

TELL IT TO GO HOME
TO ONE OF THEM.

JIM. HMM?

WOULD YOU HAVE GONE TO
ALL THIS TROUBLE TO WIN ME?

I DIDN'T HAVE TO, DEAR.

REMEMBER, IT WAS YOU
WHO PROPOSED TO ME.