Father Knows Best (1954–1960): Season 1, Episode 14 - Boy's Week - full transcript

Robert Young... and Jane Wyatt.

With Elinor Donahue,

Billy Gray, and Lauren Chapin...

Hello? Oh, hello,
Bill. How are you?

Oh, not so good, huh?

Again?

The same window?

Are you sure it was my daughter?

My little Kathy?

You are, huh?

Yes, I'll send
you a check, Bill.



Yes, of course,
I'll talk to her.

Uh-huh. Good-bye, Bill.

Well, Kathy threw another
baseball and broke a window.

That's the third hit for
her this month, isn't it?

Yes. She's had a good season.

Well, if you'll sign
this window check,

I'll send it right
over to Mr. Brown.

I made it out for
the usual amount.

I wish I could be as
accurate with a golf ball

as she is with a baseball.

Well, have a nice
weekend, Miss Thomas.

Thank you, Mr. Anderson.

I'll see you Monday morning.

Kathleen, I want to talk to you.



I didn't do it, Daddy.

Didn't do what?

Throw a baseball through
Mr. Brown's window.

Why do you immediately
assume I'm going to accuse you?

'Cause I'm the
littlest around here.

But you will admit that
Mr. Brown's window

is now in a state of shambles.

Does that mean it's broken?

Definitely.

Now, who do you suppose did it?

Now, Kathy, listen
to me carefully.

At 10:55 this morning,

you were seen in the vicinity
of Mr. William Brown's house

playing baseball.

At 11:00, a baseball was
thrown through the window

with amazing accuracy.

At 11:01, Mr. Brown
found said baseball

inside of his house
with your name on it.

Now, what do you
have to say about that?

I was framed.

Somebody broke that window.

Somebody by the
name of Anderson.

Bud?

It was your baseball, not Bud's.

Where's your mother?

Do you think she did it?

I doubt if your mother
spends her spare time

throwing baseballs at windows.

Hello, honey.

Darling, I thought you were
playing golf this afternoon.

I'm playing detective instead.

Mr. Brown's window's
been broken again.

That's three windows in
one month I've paid for.

This is embarrassing,
This keeps up,

we'll have to move out of
the neighborhood to save face.

Did you remember to bring bread?

Margaret, I said a window
has been broken. Again.

Don't look at
me. I didn't do it.

Well, Kathy said
she didn't do it, either.

Well, if Kathy said she
didn't, then she didn't.

It was her baseball.

Couldn't have been.

After the Maple Street Moppets
lost the neighborhood series,

she threw her ball away.

Hi, Father.

Hello, Princess.

I thought you were
playing golf this afternoon.

Something else came up.

There's been a sudden emergency.

Haven't we got anything to eat?

Your mother just said there's
been a sudden emergency.

We're about to
become social outcasts.

Gee, I wish our refrigerator
looked like Janie Little's.

It has such
interesting things in it.

Things like cold
turkey, pheasant, caviar.

There's been an emergency.

The name of Anderson
has been blackened,

bespattered, maligned.

Father, what in the world
are you mumbling about?

Betty, you asked a question.

Therefore it is
reasonable to assume

that you expect an answer.

I only asked if there
was something to eat.

I didn't mean to make
a federal case out of it.

Margaret, do you know
what's wrong with this family?

Apparently, we break
too many windows,

It's more than that. It's
everybody's complete disregard

for responsibility.

The inability to concentrate.

Forgetting one's
obligations to...

Where's Bud? Why isn't he
cleaning up the patio like he promised?

He has to go to a
meeting this afternoon.

He told me to tell you
that he'll do it tomorrow.

Always tomorrow.

Hi, Dad.

Hello, son.

I thought you were going
to play golf this afternoon.

I was.

But I inherited
a million dollars,

and I thought it would be nice

if we took a trip around
the world instead.

This is a lonesome-looking
refrigerator.

While on this world tour,

we're going to
hunt lions in Africa.

Joe Phillips has a tie with
hand-painted lions on it.

You see what I mean?
Nobody listens to me.

I was listening to you.

If we're going to take a trip,

I'd better start packing.

If you had to pay for
the broken window

out of your grocery money,

the situation wouldn't
be so humorous.

Did somebody break a window?

Somebody by the
name of Anderson.

Awful lot of
Andersons in this town.

It's gonna be pretty hard
to find out which one did it.

Oh, I don't know.

Good place to start
might be to ask you

what you were doing
at 11:00 this morning?

I wouldn't answer that

without the advice of a lawyer.

I don't mind.

I was practicing my
acceptance speech

in case I'm elected
Mayor of Springfield.

Elected what?

Mayor. The election's
this afternoon.

By the way, I'm
late. I gotta get going.

Wish me luck. Oh,
you know we do, dear.

What's he talking about?

Oh, it's for the
Boy's Week program.

The high school students

take over all the public
offices for one day.

Wouldn't you be surprised
if Bud was elected mayor?

Surprised? I'd be terrified.

Good-bye, my dear.

Now, what are you going
to do about the window?

First, I'm going to visit
the scene of the crime.

I want to see with my own
eyes why it's impossible

to miss Mr. Brown's window

every time somebody
throws a baseball.

And I'm going to take the
number 1 suspect with me.

All right, Sam Spade.

Do you still say you didn't
break that window, Kathy?

I still say I didn't.

But you will admit
the window's broken.

Uh-huh.

Can you prove you didn't do it?

Uh-huh.

How?

I can't throw that far.

Here. I want you to show
me how far you can throw this.

Ah-ah-ah-ah.

This way.

Oh, Kathy.

I want you to play fair.

I want you to try and throw
this as hard as you can.

You're sure? Positive.

All right.

You should've
taken my word for it.

Are you going to
punish me, Daddy?

I have to, Kathy.

I promised Mr. Brown that
I'd do something about this.

Even if I didn't do it?

Kathy, a window has been broken.

We have to set an example for the
other children in the neighborhood.

I think Mr. Brown
is very patient

considering the
fact his living room

is being used for first base.

What's it gonna cost me?

I'll take half your allowance
for the next two weeks

and apply it to the repair bill.

I can't live on 30 cents.

It's only by suffering...

Real suffering, Kathy...

That we learn the
meaning of responsibility.

Just a minute.

Oh, hello, Officer.

Don't you know you're not
supposed to park across a driveway?

Oh, I didn't park here.

Oh, I suppose
the little one did.

No. The car that was
parked in back of me

must've pushed me.

What car?

Well, he's gone now.

Anyone here can prove it?

I don't have to
prove it. I didn't do it.

Well, then you can
explain it to Judge Mitchell.

Oh, Judge Mitchell, hmm?

You know him? Do I know him.

Frank and I are just like that.

Played golf with him
hundreds of times.

Beat him? I should say so.

He's the world's
worst golfer, you know.

Yes, I know.

And he's a little
sensitive about it, too.

When do you play
golf with him again?

Well, I'm ready whenever he is.

Well, in that case,

you can set up
another date with him

when you see him in
court on Monday morning.

But, Officer, I...

And by the way, if you plan
on collecting many of those,

I suggest you let Frank
win once in a while.

Are you suffering now, Daddy?

Darling, it's hardly worth
getting so upset about.

At the most, the
fine will be $5.00.

It isn't the $5.00. It's
the principle of the thing.

Say, if Bud's elected mayor,

maybe he can fix it for you.

Fix it? Betty, I'm
surprised at you.

That's dishonest,
and you know it.

Besides, I'm innocent.

You were there, Kathy.
You saw I didn't park there.

You were a witness.

Somebody oughta be punished.

Maybe you just thought
you didn't park there.

Maybe you didn't set the
brake, and the car rolled there.

It seems to me I'm getting
very little cooperation

and understanding
from my family.

I don't think you believe me.

I know just how you feel, Daddy.

Is that you, Bud?

Yes, Mother.

Well, tell me!

What happened at the meeting?

The victor returns home.

Oh, you're mayor, Bud? Are you?

Please, Betty, don't
be so emotional.

Well, tell us, goon face.

I wasn't elected mayor.
Charlie Mason got that.

I was appointed
something else, however.

Gee.

We were hoping you'd be
mayor so you could help Father.

I wasn't going to ask for help.

Well, if in trouble
or anything, Dad,

I'm in a position
now to help you.

I am not in trouble.

He is too.

He got a ticket for parking
in somebody's driveway.

That sounds pretty serious, Dad.

That's illegal, you know.

I am well aware of
the fact that it's illegal,

but it so happens I didn't
park in the driveway.

I hope Judge Mitchell will
believe that Monday morning.

Monday morning?

Dad has to appear in
Judge Mitchell's court.

Oh, no.

And don't think I'm not
gonna tell him a thing or two.

I can't wait till
Monday morning.

Dad, Judge Mitchell won't be
on the bench Monday morning.

You know, it's too bad you and
Charlie Mason aren't better friends.

He could probably help you.

I don't need Charlie
Mason or anyone else.

I'm a taxpayer, and
I know my rights.

Jim...

This is the greatest
miscarriage of justice

in the history of
Springfield. Dad?

Jim, Judge Mitchell won't be

on the bench Monday morning.

And why not?

It's Boy's Week.

You mean some high school student
is gonna take Judge Mitchell's place?

Uh-huh.

Well, of all the...

Gee, Dad, you gotta play fair.

All us citizens agreed to
abide by the rules for one week.

That's right, Father.

All the citizens haven't.
Me, for example.

And believe me, I'm going to...

Jim, you wouldn't take
advantage of a youngster?

Would you?

Would you?

My integrity has
been questioned.

My honor is at stake.

And if you think I'm
going to entrust my case

to some unfledged,
underaged, half baked...

Bud.

Yes, sir.

What are you going to do
do Daddy in court tomorrow?

I really haven't decided.

I'll have to hear
the case first.

Are you going to
send him to jail?

It all depends on what
you say in court tomorrow.

You know, you're
his only witness.

Suppose if I'm not careful,

it could be pretty
unpleasant around here.

You said it.

Well, you comfortable, Bud?

The sun's in my eyes, Dad.

Would you mind moving
me back just a little?

Oh, not at all. Not at all.

How's that?

Uh, a little more.

All right.

There. That's fine.

Good.

Well, Kathy, you're
looking mighty pretty today.

Thank you, Daddy.

Anything you'd like?
Candy bar? Ice cream?

Yes, thank you. Ice cream.

Tutti-frutti.

Fine. How 'bout you, Bud?

I mean Judge.

Think I might have a
little ice cream at that.

Fine. I'll run over to the
drugstore and get some.

Any particular flavor?

Uh, pistachio with pecans.

Well, I'll certainly
see if they have it.

My, you're nice today, Daddy.

Well, I always say,

nothing's too
good for my family.

After all, it's one for all

and all for one.

Dad, if you're trying to butter
me up for tomorrow, it won't work.

Bud, how can you think that?

Do I have to be there
tomorrow, Daddy?

Of course, Kitten.
You're my only witness.

I have to have someone
there to tell the judge

I didn't park in the driveway.

But I don't know
if you did or not.

Now, Kathy...

Please, Dad. It isn't fair
to influence the witness.

Pistachio and pecans.

Tutti-frutti.

You know, it's kind of nice

having a criminal in the family.

Hear ye, hear ye.

The magistrate's court

of the City of Springfield

will now come to order.

Imagine, my son a judge.

It's a day like this, Margaret,

that makes me
proud to be a father.

I don't think you're Bud's
father today, Jim. What?

He said this morning, that
as long as he's the judge,

you're to be treated
like any other criminal.

You mean I waited
on that young upstart

all day yesterday for nothing?

He's just trying to
be impartial, Jim.

All right.

If he can forget I'm his father,

I can forget he's my son.

Will the courtroom rise, please?

Jim, stand up.

I will not.

Will everyone please stand?

Jim, you're not going to be
too rough on him, are you?

I let him has his fun yesterday.

Now it's my turn.

You may proceed.

The court calls upon
Charles Ferguson.

Parking in a restricted area.

Mr. Ferguson, do you
plead guilty or not guilty?

Guilty, Your Honor.

$5.00. Pay the clerk.

Bud seems to know
what he's doing.

He'd better.

Quiet in the courtroom, please.

Oh, he's asking
for it, Margaret.

Don't you dare take
advantage of him.

He should've thought
of that yesterday

when he had me waiting
on him hand and foot.

George Carey.

Failing to stop at a red signal.

Mr. Carey, do you
plead guilty or not guilty?

Guilty, Your Honor.

$5.00. Pay the clerk.

I'll bet Bud can't wait
to get me up there.

I'll bet Judge
Mitchell can't, either.

James Anderson, Sr.

Parking in front of a driveway.

Do you plead
guilty or not guilty?

I plead not guilty.

You have your
choice, Mr. Anderson,

of a trial by judge
or a trial by jury.

Which do you prefer?

I prefer a trial by
jury, uh, Your Honor.

That is your privilege.

However, the court
wishes to remind you

that if you lose the case,
you must pay court costs,

including the cost of a jury.

I do?

That is correct.

Well, in that case,

I'll accept a trial by judge.

Who is your attorney of record?

Well, you seem to
be running the show.

I suggest you appoint a
public defender for me.

All right.

Will Mr. Pee Wee Sturdihall
approach the bench?

Yes, Your Honor?

Uh, never mind.

I think I'm quite capable of
handling my own defense.

Thank you, Pee Wee.

Whew. Am I glad.

You may proceed, Mr. Anderson.

Very well.

Bud... I mean Your Honor,

I am accused of parking
my car in a public driveway.

I contend that my car was
pushed into that position

by another car.

Do you have a witness?

I do. Miss Kathleen Anderson.

Miss Kathleen Anderson,
please take the stand.

Where does he
want me to take it?

He means he wants you
to go up and sit down, dear.

And for goodness' sake,
be careful what you say,

or we'll all go to jail.

Do you promise
to tell the truth,

the whole truth, and
nothing but the truth?

I'll be in trouble if I do.

Kathy...

Quiet from the
accused, of you please.

I do.

Thank you, Miss
Anderson. You may sit down.

Bud, why aren't you
this polite at home?

Uh, sit down, Kathy.

Now, Kathy, when
I parked the car

in front of Mr. Brown's
on Saturday,

where were you sitting?

In the car.

I know that, I mean,
front seat or back seat?

Front seat.

Now, from where you sat,

could you tell that I didn't
park in the driveway?

No, Daddy.

Now, Kathy...

Mr. Anderson, the court suggests

that you pay the $5.00 fine
and dispense with the trial.

I won't pay a fine for
something I didn't do.

But gee whiz, Dad.

I mean, Mr. Anderson.
It's only $5.00.

I don't care if it's 10 cents.

Mr. Anderson, the
court finds you guilty.

Guilty?

So pay the clerk $5.00.

And stop arguing.

Bud?

Bud. Bud Anderson.

I don't care if
this is Boy's Week

or whether you're a judge
of the Supreme Court.

You can't talk to
your father that way.

I'm sorry, but you
don't have the right

to speak to the
judge that way, either.

I'll have to fine you $5.00

for contempt of court.

Bud!

When I get you
home, young man...

That'll be $5.00 more.

Judge Mitchell, Bud has no right

to show such
disrespect for his father.

You don't seem to
understand, Mrs. Anderson.

This is a court of law.

Your husband is a man who
came here seeking justice,

and that's just what
he's going to get.

Family relationships have
nothing to do with the issue.

If that's the case, then
Bud has no right to fine me

just because I'm his father.

Yes. You have a point there.

But I'm not your son, so I can.

Court finds you guilty.

Next case.

You'll have to settle with
the court clerk, please.

There goes the
rest of my allowance.

Oh, stop worrying, Bud.

Everything's gonna be all right.

You don't have
to live here. I do.

I've known your dad a long time.

Can't say much about his golf,

but other than that,
he's fair, honorable...

And he's mad.

Uh-oh.

Well, well.

You've had a busy day
today, haven't you, Jim?

Hilarious.

You should be a
very, very proud father.

I should be proud because my son and
daughter made me look like a fool in court?

He was only practicing
what you taught him.

How do you figure that?

Well, somebody certainly
taught Kathy the value of truth.

And Bud, here,
doing his level best

to administer justice
equally and fairly,

regardless of the consequences.

You punished Kathy for
a window she didn't break

to keep the other kids from
breaking windows, didn't you, Dad?

Yes.

Well, I fined you for
parking in a driveway

to show others that
they couldn't do it.

It's kind of the
same thing, isn't it?

It is the same thing,
Bud. I was wrong.

And I was proud of you.

Congratulations. Thanks, Dad.

But wait till I get you out on
the golf course again, Frank.

You just stay out
of driveways, Jim.

But I tell you I did... Okay.

Dinner's ready, Jim.

And I set a place
for you, too, Frank.

Kathy says it's a court order.

In that case, Margaret,

I'd be in contempt
if I didn't accept.

Come on... judge.

Closed-Captioned By J.R.
Media Services, Inc. Burbank, CA