Fargo (2014–…): Season 2, Episode 2 - Before the Law - full transcript

The Gerhardts receive a surprising offer, while two unlikely murderers do their best to clean up their mess.

Mama, can I, huh?
Mama, can I, huh, huh?

Can I, Mama, won't you please let me?
Mama, can I, huh?

That's the sweetest little dress,
Sally Where'd you get the pattern?

Made me one just like it
out of yellow dotted Swiss

Yes, I guess we got the
earliest garden in the county

Beneath the strawberries are a
heap of snappin' green beans

Too bad about your boy

Mama, make Willie
quit pulling at my hair

Mama, ouch! Ouch!
Mama, just make Willie quit it

Tommy, if ya
don't put down that stick

I'm gonna wear you out
with it Boy, be quick

Come quick, Sammy Jean stuck
her finger in a Coke bottle

Can't get it out 'cause
it's stuck, stuck, stuck

Now I told you my mama
didn't raise no fool

I can do anything
if I got the right tools

Mama, can I, huh?
Mama, can I, huh, huh?

Can I, Mama, won't you please let me?
Mama, can I, huh?

Jeremy Kleiner up
in Winnipeg writes,

"Feel better, boss man."
That's nice.

And then,

Carter Bunch says,

"Keep fightin', you old cuss.
You'll outlive us all."

Indian Joe sent porn.

Give these to the Chinaman.
The usual disbursement.

Get your dad and uncles.

We need to talk.

You finish your chores?

Yes, sir. Been helpin'
Grandma with the bank.

She sent me to get you. Wants us
all together up in the house.

Dodd's inside.

...fought in
the trenches in France.

World War I.

He was an Artillerieschützen,
my granddad, a gunner.

Blasted mustard
gas at the Allies.

Had 'em dancing
like poisoned rats.

The Brits caught him in a raid,

hung him by his thumbs
for six days straight,

so this, what we're doin',
this is nothin'.

Are you listening to me?

Is he listening to me?

Cut off his ears.

Wake him up.

He's dead, I think.


Uncle Dodd?

Doc's finished.
Grandma wants us.

Who were the goons?

Kansas City.

They wanna buy us out.

So they came to you, then?

They came to see your father.
But he's not well.

So they talked to
me as a surrogate.

I should have been there.

Jeez, Dad. Don't be such a baby.

Shut up.

She shouldn't be in here.

She's old enough.
I told her to stay.

She's a girl.

And girls grow up to be women,

and change boys' diapers.

Where's your little brother?

Rye? Haven't seen him.

Who knows with that kid? Probably
neck deep in some pussy.

With a girl, you know.

What's the offer?

He talks to you. Where is he?

Said he had things
to do out of town.

- I saw him yesterday.
- What things?

What's the offer?

The world's
becoming more corporate.

This was their pitch to me.

And in this new world there's
no room for family business.

So, war.

They're offering to buy
the whole operation,

then pay us to run it.

Bottom line?

Bottom line, very little
changes on the ground.

We may actually earn more.

But instead of running it,
we report to them.

To who? Kansas City.

Balls. What'd you say?

I said thank you very much,
I'll consult with my partners.

Meaning, Grandpa.


The stroke.

Your father is not
in a lucid state.

Nor will he be, possibly ever.

What are you saying?

I'm saying your grandpa
built this business,

but he's no longer
capable of running it.

We should have
a moment of silence, maybe.

As new boss,

I say we tell these
Kansas City schwanzes

to go to hell in the fast lane.

Now, hold on.

What, you think
it should be you?

No, stupid.


Boss can't be a woman!

Who says?

Think about it.

Mom's the one with
ties to Winnipeg.

History with Carter B
and the Solkerk crew.

Suppliers trust her.

It should be Mom.

Hell, yes. I vote for Grandma.

Shut up. We're not voting.

I'm oldest.

I'm boss.

End of story.

Give us a minute.

Not you.


Eat somethin'.

This moment,

how things go in
the next few weeks,

will decide...

That's why... Let me finish!

Your grandfather left the
ashes of the Weimar Republic

and came to this country
to build a name for himself.

He built an empire

from a shoe shine box,

and then and only then
did he send for your father.

Ma. I know the story.

No. You don't.

'Cause if you did, you'd know that
you are just a small part of it.

That's what an empire is.

It's bigger than any son.

Or daughter.


I'm not hungry.

I'm your mother,
you will eat with me.

Your time will come.

It will.

But this isn't it.

And if you stand by me now,

I promise you that as soon
as this crisis is over,

I'll hand you your legacy

and I'll turn my
thoughts to the grave.

Now, we need to find Rye.

Can you do that for me?

Yes, ma'am.

Wherever he is,
whatever he's doing,

bring him home.

If you were
a betting man, I'm sayin'.

Well, I think history has proven

people of the Germanic
persuasion don't surrender easy.

But you can kill 'em.

Unless the woman,
being a woman...

Maybe we can scare her.


I think we cut a deal
with one of the sons.

The youngest maybe, Rye.

The elders are...

Well, you know how a lobster's got
a pincher claw and a crusher claw?

Which one's which?


Which son is which claw?

You know what? Forget it.

I don't want anything to do
with your fakakta metaphor.

Management says acquire the
territory, we acquire it.

Whether that's cash down or
sending bodies to the morgue,

that's up to the krauts.

First Gerhardt to switch sides
gets a shiny red apple.

No, I know.

I know. Uh-huh.

No, no. Sheriff says
it's a local matter.


Okay then.


- Papa.
- That's me.


Did you get some sleep?

Uh... A couple hours,
you know. Went pretty late.

- Papa. Papa.
- What? What?

What can I make you?

Uh, eggs would be good,
if not a bother.

I could do oatmeal, maybe.

Tell me a story.

Somethin' about
the smell of eggs right now...

Okay, coffee's fine.



Once upon a time
there was an oyster.

What's an oyster?

It's a shellfish.


Close enough. Lou sleepin'?

He had a call with the brass.
Should be down soon.

Apparently, one of your
victims was a judge.

- A judge, huh? Uh-huh.

The older woman?

Out of North Dakota.



Hello. Yes.

What's the story?

What story?

About the oyster.

Oh, uh...


Sorry. Lieutenant called.

Judge, huh?

- Betsy told you.
- Yeah.

Yeah, municipal
judge up in Fargo.

Huh. Oh, yeah.

One day, the oyster
got caught in the net.

Fisherman pulled him up,
all set to eat him.

Except he happened to have
his daughter in the boat.

And she said...

"Daddy, how would you feel

"if I peeled the roof off
your house and ate you?"

Was that you?

It was.

That's the story of
how your mom and me

came to eat hot dogs for
dinner, once again.


Hey, so knowing she's a judge,
that change anything?

Well, you know, I guess
we gotta ask ourselves,

was this judge just in the
wrong place at the wrong time,

or was this
whole mess about her?

Gonna be late for work, huh?

Yeah, I don't think
I'm goin' in today.

Well, gotta keep up
appearances though, right?

You said.

Jeez, hon, your eye...

No, it doesn't hurt. It just.
. . It looks bad.

Maybe I should stay home too.

No. You should go.

Just tell them you hit
your head or something.

I gotta...

There's too much
stuff to do here.


Car's gotta be cleaned,
the floors.

I mean...


Are you with me?


Bear's thrown in with Momma.
That's his loss.

Distributors will stand
with me, if I press.

But we need Rye.

So, when you find him, you bring
him to me first, you understand?

Not her. Me.

There you go.


Remember to cook them
all the way through this time.

Oh. Thank you. Hey there, Peggy.


Expecting your husband.

Yeah, he had...

At dinner last night,
I think it was some bad clams.

You know, from a can.

Never trust anything
that comes from the sea.

We came from the sea.

Tomorrow, for sure.


- Bye.
- Bye.

...a desperado, I heard.

But Sheriff thinks a pair of 'em

gunned down those poor people
at the Waffle Hut

one after another in cold blood.

I mean, first Watergate
and now this.

What's the world coming to?

Sorry, Mrs. Colson.
Car wouldn't start.

I'll ditch the coat and get
you squared away, okay?

Big night?


Got a hangover?


No, it's just a migraine.

You talk to Ed?

Did I...

About the seminar. Next weekend?

Got us a room at
the Southnick Hotel.

Oh, yeah.

I don't know.
It's a lot of money.

And we're saving up right now,
so Ed can buy the butcher shop.

What I'm hearing, is you think your
husband's more important than you,

his needs.

No. I just...

We got a plan, you know?

The word "we" is a castle, hon,
with a moat and a drawbridge.

And you know what gets
locked up in castles?



Don't be a prisoner of "we."

Take the seminar.

It'll give you
a key to the castle.


Oh, hey, you don't know what
happened to all the TP, do you?

The what's that?

Had a case of TP in the back last week.
Somebody took it.

Yes, sir. I know I said it
was a local matter last night,

but I slept on it, you know?

And given the level of violence,
and with no apparent suspects,

and the fact that one of
the victims was a judge...

Right, in North Dakota,

which means you're gonna have
all kinds of interstate issues.

So, my thought is, you know,
all the more reason for me...

Yes, sir.

Thank you, sir.

I'll coordinate
with Sheriff Larsson,

and head up to Fargo
first thing tomorrow.


Yeah, I know, we...

You said all that,
but my point...

What I'm trying to...

I've got the money, see...
I've got...



I mean, I will have.

So, you just need to hold
the Selectrics for me until...


So, just hold them, okay?

And I'll call you back.

Hi, there.

Money troubles?


Oh! No, he double-billed me
for something, is all.

Just straightening things out.

I see.


We're not really open,
is the thing.

Waitin' for new
models to come in.

So, closed temporarily.

That's okay.

We're not really customers.

Okay, well...

Rye Gerhardt.

Is that your name, or...

I mean, geez,
I met the guy, of course.

Once or twice.

Were you...

Did you need
a character reference or...

That's good.

I like that.

"A character reference."

How about you just
tell us where he is,

seeing as he
works for you and all.

Well, isn't that what
you told Big Jim Suggs?

Over at the Pig
'n' Poke yesterday?

Had a few drinks.

Told him you had
a Gerhardt in your pocket.

I never...


Kids today love to
talk on the phone,

but I'm a big
believer in correspondence,

friendly or otherwise.

"If you've got a complaint,"
is my motto,

"put it in writing."

For instance,

last week I bought one of those

new automated
coffeemakers at Sears.

You know, the one
with the clock inside?

And the thing is,
pardon my French,

a real piece of shit.

So, what do I do?

"Dear General Electric,

"the coffee maker that I
bought at Sears on 11th March

"makes a noise when it's brewing

"that sounds like a fat man
having a heart attack."


"And it forces me
to ask the question,

"is this why our once-great
nation is going down the crapper?

"Yours in peace and harmony,

"Mike Milligan."

The judge!

Go on.

All I said was talk to her.

What judge?


Judge Mundt!

Talk to her.

That's what you said?



What happened?

There he goes!

Don't let him get away, man!

Get a rope and we'll hang him!

One hour ahead of the posse

The bloodhounds
are hot on my trail

Last evening I shot down
my sweetheart

This morning I broke out of jail

My Pinto is tired and hungry

And I'm feeling weary and gone

We started ahead of the posse

And we got to keep going on

The Sheriff has sworn
he will get me

He's riding with 20 and five

But I ain't afeared
of that posse

For they'll never
will get me alive

One hour ahead of the posse

No turning to left or to right

We must win the race
to the river

Or there'll be a hanging tonight

We're gonna hang him tonight

One hour ahead of the posse

And now I'm inside on my own

At last we have
beaten that posse

May the Lord have mercy
on my soul

You said to remind you I got
that specialist appointment Tuesday.

Dad said he'd watch Molly.

I'll drive you.

You sure? You got the case.

I'll drive you.

We feel so special, don't we?

Gettin' Daddy for lunch.


Captain said wait
on going up to Fargo.

He needs to work out some kind
of chain of command BS, so...




I got a wild hair.

Something's not adding up.

Stay here, okay? Uh-huh.

What's Daddy doing?

Work stuff.

You wanna build a snowman?

You wanna build a snowman?

Can we do it over there?

How 'bout right here?

Okay, should we
start getting some snow?


What are you gonna
call the snowman, Molly?

Maybe Bob.


All right, we got the bottom.

Next, we need to make the body.

I need you to find me
some sticks for the arms.

Okay? Yeah.

Thank you.

Momma! Yeah?

Look what I found!

Can I keep it?

No, hon. It's got a rip.

That's trash now. Okay?

Okay, okay.


Look at this!

Look what I found.
That's great, hon.

I found it in the bushes.

- Fingerprints.
- Yeah, I know.

Jeez, I got it by the barrel.

What's that?

Momma's doing Daddy's job again.

Go, Momma!

You okay, hon? Yeah.

I stood up too fast, is all.

Help you, Officer?

Sir, please roll up your window.

My friend up front doesn't
like to talk to strangers.

Well, he's gonna talk to me.

Rock County.

It's like...

What's that town
on The Flintstones?

Is that where we are?

On the Flintstones?

All right, that's it.
Out of the car, all of you.

Your friends, too.

Come around
the driver's side here.

Okay, let me see some IDs.

I'm gonna reach in my pocket.

Now them.

Mike Milligan

and two named Kitchen.

Brothers, yeah?

Yes, sir. That's us.

Kansas City.

What's this about,
Sheriff, if I'm okay to ask?

Now, if I were to search you
three, would I find weapons?

Well, sir.

You have nothin'
to fear from us.

We're just passin' through town
on our way to points south.

Thought we'd stop
for some waffles.

Gale's idea.

Heard you had some
real good ones around here.

So, you can imagine our surprise

when we find the place closed, and,
apparently, the scene of a crime.

What size shoes you boys wear?

Now, that is
a truly odd question.

Last time I checked,
I was a 10. Boys?

Now, I'm gonna go ahead
and guess the boys are an 11,

and not a two, which would
make them toddlers.

Now, unless there's
some law been broken,

I think it's time for
us to be on our way.

I promised the boys' wives
I'd have them home for supper.

And I am, if nothing else,
a man of my word.


I got your names
and your plate number.

I'm gonna radio ahead and make
sure you make it out of state.

If not,

I'm gonna put out a APB,
and have you boys rounded up.

And then we'll talk again.

You understand?

I do.

And isn't that a minor miracle?

The state of the world today,

the level of conflict
and misunderstanding,

that two men could stand on a
lonely road in winter and talk,

calmly and rationally.

While all around them
people are losing their mind.

You have a nice day.

- Good night, Noreen.
- Okay then.

Don't be silly.
I'll give you a ride.

You sure?
I don't wanna be a bother.

No bother.

Come on, sexy. Get in.

Right to the right, there.

Ooh! You're a life saver.

It's a real mess.

Thanks, doll.

Shouldn't have had
all that ginger ale.



Well, I might take a plane

Might take a train

if I got to walk,
I'm going just the same

I'm going to Kansas City

Kansas City, here I come

They got some crazy
little women there

Jeez. What happened to your car?

Oh, no. It's nothing.
Just a dust-up.

Ed had a few too many last
night, and hit a tree.

He's fine though. Just shook up.

What about you?

Me? Oh, no, I wasn't...
I was home.

Those bills aren't
gonna pay themselves.

You're kind of
a bad girl, aren't you?

Yeah, you are.

I'm usually able to tell right
away, but you had me fooled.

Oh, it's nothin'.
I just bumped it, is all.

In the dust-up?

Thought you weren't
in the car, you said.

It's okay. You don't
have to tell the truth.

I'm not even mad about the TP.

Next time, just ask though.

Or maybe that's what you like.


Breaking the rules?

Thanks for the ride, okay?

I've just got a real bad headache,
like I said before, and...

So maybe, I'll just see you
at work tomorrow, okay?

Sleep well, now.

Didn't expect
you'd still be here.


Found possibly the murder weapon
over in the bushes there.

Betsy did, I mean,

if I'm being honest,
which I try to be.

So, now I'm wondering
what else I missed.

Anything interesting
on that car I called in?


Those fellows were
positively fascinating.

Nothin' actionable, though.

Cook fell funny, is the truth.

Why I'm still here.

Got stuck in my head.


Heard it referred to once
as a convergence.

You know, one thing
reminds you of another.


Wanna talk about it?

Not especially.

We had a guy on the boat, liked
to smoke cigars for breakfast.

Picked up the habit
from his granddad, he said.

This was on the Bode River, '74.

So, I'm on the wheel,
this kid comes out...

'Cause what could he
have been? Nineteen?

Lights his shit stick,
and then...

He never even saw it coming.

Shot him right
through the cigar.

A one-in-a-million shot.

And the look on his
face when he fell...

Just like the cook.



This German captain
hung himself.


Found him in
a bunker during the mop-up,

face all purple,

eyes bugged out.

Then in '62,
I'm responding to a suicide.

Fellow's in his bathroom,

swinging from an electric cord.

You never know. Mmm.

War stories.

Different now, though.

After WWII,

we went six years
without a murder here.

Six years.

Now, these days, well...

Sometimes I wonder if you boys
didn't bring that war home with you.

Hey. Burnin' it
at both ends, huh?

Yeah. Yeah.

Double shift for me.

Yeah. Hear what happened?

- At the Waffle Hut? Yeah.
- Yeah.

Real mess. Yeah.

The killer still
at large, they say?

Yeah, we think so.

Anyway, saw your light on.

You know, Molly loves
bacon for breakfast.

I seem to remember we're out.

So, I thought, if you don't
mind, I'd pick some up,

be there when she woke up.

Yeah. Yeah?

Yeah, sure. Come on in.


So, you want fatback or...

Well, lean, if you got it.


Third of a pound.

So, how's Peggy?

Yeah, she's, uh...

She's doin' good.

You know, doin' real...

Work's good, she says.

Yeah, I think
Betsy's coming in this week

for a trim, which...

I don't know why I know that.


They talk whether
we're listening or not.

Yeah? Oh, yeah. Oh.

No, it's... It's on the house.

No, no, let me...

No, I... I got it.

I... I got it, here we go.
All right, hold on.

You gonna get that?



Why is it takin' so long?

Yeah, it's just...

The wife... I'm almost done.

Well, can you hurry up? I don't
like being here by myself.






Yeah, I still gotta...

You know, it takes time,
grinding a whole...

No, I know. I...

I just miss you, is all.

No, I miss you too, hon.

It's just...

I'll make some oatmeal, okay?

And we can have breakfast
when you get home.


I love you.

Love you, too.


No one would've believed,

in the last years
of the 19'th century

that human affairs
were being watched

from the timeless
worlds of space.

No one could've dreamed
we were being scrutinized,

as someone with a microscope
studies creatures that swarm

and multiply in a drop of water.

Few men even consider the possibility
of life on other planets,

and yet,
across the gulf of space,

minds immeasurably
superior to ours,

regarded this
earth with envious eyes

and slowly and surely they
drew their plans against us.