Fantasy Island (1977–1984): Season 3, Episode 10 - The Pug/Class of '69 - full transcript

The plane! The plane!

Good morning, boss.

Good morning, Tattoo.

Smiles everyone! Smiles!

Joey Lee and his son, Mitch.

Is he here for the big
fight? He looks like a boxer.

He does indeed, Tattoo. Mr. Lee
was once an up-and-coming boxer,

who many thought would be the
World Heavy Weight Champion.

But an injury ended his dreams

and he now works on the
waterfront as a stevedore,

though, he still takes
occasional club fights.



In fact, while here
on Fantasy Island,

he'll be acting as a sparring
partner for Mr. Jackson Malone.

A sparring partner for
the world champion?

Boss, I bet I know
what his fantasy is?

What?

Is to stay alive
for the weekend.

Mr. Lee doesn't have
a fantasy, Tattoo.

But unbeknownst
to him, his son does.

Young Mitch wants to see his father
fight for and win the world championship.

A sparring partner
win the championship?

Boss, I think this
time you blew it.

Miss Brenda Richards,

who owns a very successful catering
business in San Francisco, California.

She looks like she's been
eating some of the profit.



Miss Richards does
like to eat. That is true.

What she doesn't like are
the results, or so she says.

And her fantasy is to
be thin and beautiful.

Yes. Miss Richards wishes
to be thin and beautiful

because her graduation class
is holding its 10th annual reunion

here on Fantasy Island.

But there is one man in particular
Miss Richards wishes to impress.

His name is Mr. Lance Reynolds.

And she's in love with him.

Quite the contrary, my friend.

Ten years ago Mr. Reynolds
publicly humiliated Miss Richards

at the senior prom.

And now the young lady
wants something in return.

Sweet, sweet revenge.

My dear guests, I am
Mr. Roarke, your host.

Welcome to Fantasy Island.

You got real class, you
know that, Mr. Roarke?

The plane ride, the
drinks, the whole enchilada.

I mean, even if for some reason

you couldn't fulfill my fantasy,

I'm happy enough
just being here.

I am very pleased, Miss
Richards. Now if you'll allow me.

Your new wardrobe.

Really? Mmm-hmm.

All this for me? Yes.

Uh...

I've heard you're
good, Mr. Roarke,

but making my bod
fit into this little number

is gonna be some
kind of challenge.

We are quite prepared for the
challenge, as you call it, Miss Richards.

Quite prepared indeed.

Tattoo. Miss Richards.

Thank you. Here you
are, Miss Richards.

What's this?

A very rare potion

which will enable you to fulfill
at least part of your fantasy.

Thank you, Tattoo.

You better drink all of it now,

so you don't get
any side effects.

Side effects? What kind?

The less questions, the
better, Miss Richards.

However I suggest
you sit down first.

This is kind of like The
Incredible Hulk in reverse.

Weight watchers of the world,

eat your hearts out.

I can't believe it!

I just lost two whole people!

Isn't that what you wanted?

Yes, but I gotta tell you,
I did have my doubts.

Miss Richards, I suggest you
hurry and change your clothes.

The luau starting the
celebration of your class reunion

starts in about an hour.

A luau! All right!

Oh, um, one last thing.

The effects of the potion

will wear off in
precisely 48 hours.

Well, that'll give
me plenty of time.

Are you still intent on gaining
revenge, Miss Richards?

Yes, I am, Mr. Roarke.

Maybe it isn't very admirable,

but I can't forget what Lance
Reynolds did to me at that prom.

I was just a fat dumb kid,

so impressed with him and
so anxious to win his approval,

I'd have done
anything to please him.

He took advantage
of me, Mr. Roarke.

Half undressed me
in the high school gym.

Then he turned
on all the lights.

And there stood my
classmates, all laughing at me.

It was vicious. Degrading.

Miss Richards, Mr. Lance Reynolds
will be at the luau this afternoon.

Will you excuse us? Tattoo.

How do you do, sports fans?

This is Scott Ames
speaking to you by satellite

from the fabulous
Fantasy Island,

the site of the upcoming World
Heavy Weight Boxing Championship

between Jackson Malone,
the Champion of the World,

and Wally Ray
Stone, the challenger.

Now, we've been given permission

to televise part of
Malone's workout today.

And if the sparring
partner looks familiar to you,

it's Joey Lee once,
and not too long ago,

a very popular
contender in his own right.

Meantime, the champion
looks in fine physical condition.

Let's watch him for a while.

Oh, incidentally, Charlie
Darcy, the champ's manager,

is very angry that Wally Ray
Stone hasn't yet set foot here

on Fantasy Island.

Oh, there's a nice right to
the body and a left to the body,

a right to the...
Oh, hold the phone!

All right, Dad! Hold
the phone, folks.

The champion is
down. Malone is down.

Now, I don't know whether
he slipped or whether Joey Lee

got in one of those well
remembered combinations of his.

Champ? Look, I'm sorry.

I guess I got carried away.

Yeah. Just a lucky punch.

Yeah, sure.

Don't let it happen again.

All right, that's all
for now, Champ.

Hold it. Will you, hold
it? Hold it, will you?

Let's hit the showers.

Charlie Darcy, the champ's
manager, has just called has just called

a halt to the affair today.

We will wrap it up
here at Fantasy Island...

Great going, Dad! You
really showed him how.

Joey, don't make a mistake like that
ever again if you want to keep your job.

It's important you remember
who the champ is around here.

Yeah. Sorry, Mr. Darcy.

That is the greatest looking chick
I've seen since we've been here.

Well, you're not gonna believe it,
Lance, but that's Brenda Richards.

Brenda Richards?
Brenda Richards?

El fatso? Good Lord.

You know something? I never thought
in my life I'd want to hit on that hippo.

But I'm gonna now.

She wasn't even worth a mercy
trip before. I wonder how she did it?

Who cares? She's my style.

Lance, are you forgetting
what you did to her at the prom?

Man, that was a long time
ago and you laughed, too.

Yeah, but I wasn't as
hard on her as you were.

She probably
forgot all about it.

Brenda, baby? Huh?

Yeah? It's me, Lance.

Lance? Lance.

Oh, Lance Reynolds.

Hey, don't I rate a kiss, a
handshake or something, huh?

Careful or you'll spill my food.

Man, you must have
some metabolism.

If I ate half that
much, balloon city.

Oh, well, I was just
getting this for a friend.

Me, I eat like a bird.

Yeah, well, you got
the body to prove it, too.

Say, forget your friend.
Let me buy you a drink.

Thanks, but no thanks.

At least not for now.

See you.

Well? Did she remember you?

Yeah.

And this time I'm not gonna turn
up the lights. You know what I mean?

Thank you for coming, gentlemen.

I have here in my hand
a cablegram stating

that Mr. Wally Ray Stone
has withdrawn from the fight.

Withdrawn? What
are you talking about?

An old ring injury has
apparently flared up.

Sounds like a
shortage of guts to me.

So what do we do
now, huh, cancel?

Are you nuts?

Now what's that
supposed to mean?

You and your free spending.

You've already blown most of the
million-dollar guaranty the network put up.

We're scheduled for
this fight around the world

in less than two days.
We can't cancel. Period.

Oh, that's fine. And who are
we gonna get to fight? Period.

Um, I don't want to seem
presumptuous, gentlemen,

but perhaps you
could find a substitute.

Like who?

Well, I...

Perhaps Mr. Malone's
sparring partner?

What, Joey Lee?
That'd never work.

But I am told that Mr. Lee
was once ranked number six

and I am also told that

he knocked you down, Mr. Malone,

during today's sparring
session. Is this true?

Lucky punch.

Besides it's been a long time
since Joey was a contender.

Well then, gentlemen, I suppose
you will have to cancel the fight

and eat your losses.

Wait, wait, listen.

You know, Joey was pretty
popular when he was in his prime.

Number six, as you said.

And I still feel that the fight fans
of this world will remember him.

No.

What do you think, Mr. Ames?

Will the network approve
Joey Lee as a substitute?

With your skills and resources,

I would imagine you could publicize
him into a creditable contender.

Don't you think?

Let's get on the horn to
New York and find out.

By all means.

Oh, and, uh, if I may suggest,

tell them you have all the
possibilities of another Rocky here.

A down-and-outer rising
to the ultimate heights.

That's a great idea, Mr. Roarke.

And, you know,
it just might work.

Yeah, you know...

Bernie? Bernie Drissel?

Drexel.

Frank Thomas. We took
social studies together.

Right. Frank.
Frank, how are you?

So, what you been up
to, Bernie baby? Huh?

Oh, this and that. Married?

Uh, no.

Never found the
right one, huh? No.

Hey, now don't you worry. Let me tell,
you there's plenty of action around here.

Yeah? Speaking of which,

have you seen your old
pal, Brenda Richards?

Oh, uh, no, I was kind
of hoping she'd be here.

Take a look for yourself.
Isn't she something?

Got everybody in this
group buzzing, let me tell you.

Hey, what are you
waiting for? Go to it.

Everybody else is
trying to hit on her.

Oh, uh, no, I don't...

I don't think Brenda
would be interested in me.

Are you kidding?

I saw the way you
guys were in high school.

Oh, we were just friends. Yeah.

Well, time to renew old
friendships 'cause here she comes.

Bernie. Brenda.

It's really good to see you.

Well, it's... It's really
good to see you. Gosh...

What have you
been up... So, uh...

Say, I hear you're in
the catering business.

Yup. Keeps me close to the eats.

Well, I don't know how
you do it. You're just...

You're skinny as a rail.

I fast a lot.

What have you been doing
to make a buck these days?

Stockbroker. Oh.

Yeah, futures, mainly.

Brenda?

Oh, Bernie, let's get out
of here. So many people.

Oh, uh, okey-doke...

A great grandfather figure.

You know, the type who amassed
three fortunes by the time he was 25...

Dad?

But lost each overnight. Dad?

Yeah? Yeah?

What's up?

When you hit Mr. Malone today,

you know with your
combination? Yeah?

Was it just a lucky punch?

No, no. You know, it was kind of,
I guess, half and half. That was all.

What do you mean
"half and half?"

Mitch, why don't you
go swimming, okay?

I'd rather talk.

I know you'd rather
talk. But listen, pal,

if I'm gonna get off the
docks, I gotta study, okay?

Hi, Mitch. Joey.

Oh, hi. We'd
like to talk to you.

Yeah, sure. What's up?

Your bank account, Joey,

if you agree to fight my
man for the championship.

Oh come on. You're
kidding. What do you mean?

You heard me. Wally
Ray Stone pulled out.

Wait a minute.

You want my dad to fight for
the championship of the world?

That's right, kid.

No, no deal. I mean, I'm...

I'm not ready for
that kind of a fight.

Dad, what are you talking about?

I'm talking about your old
man being a bit past his prime.

Dad, this is our chance, the
fight we've always wanted.

You can't just turn it down.

You just can't.

The kid's right, Joey.

Please, Dad? Please.

You really want this?

Okay. All right, I'll fight him.

That's more like it.

We'll meet later.
Work out the details.

Yeah, okay.

Take care, Joey. Bye, Mitch.

Thanks.

Now you don't have
to study anymore.

You're going to be champion
of the whole wide world.

Okay, that's good.

Joey? Huh?

Joey, can I see you a minute?

Thanks.

Yeah?

What's up?

Look, I just thought I'd let
you know how things stand.

Now look, as you know,
this fight is a big media event.

The network's planning a
crash program to build you up,

so they'll be working
round the clock

trying to get angles on
you and your personal life.

And, um, speaking of
angles, I got one of my own.

Like what?

Like how we're gonna
divide up the purse.

Come on, Darcy, I
mean, it's your package.

You tell me how we divide it.

Look,

now you know
Malone is kind of lazy

and he could be in
better shape and...

Look after all, we're just
putting on a show here so...

So in the third round, you hit
the canvas and you stay there.

Okay?

Why don't you give me a typewritten
script, huh? So I don't blow it.

Joey, you do what I say
and you'll collect $50,000.

You don't do what I say and
you'll wind up with $5,000,

sparring partner wages.

Now, how about it?

What difference does it make?

All right, we got a deal?

In other words, we
got a deal, right?

Yeah, I take a
dive in the third.

Excuse me, I'm gonna
go wash this scum off.

♪ Nothing more than feelings

♪ Trying to forget my

♪ Feelings of love ♪

Well, mind if I cut in?

Uh, Brenda?

Uh...

I guess it's all right, as
long as you don't mind.

Heck no. Not at all.

Mmm, you smell nice.

So do you.

You know,

I think you're in better shape than
you were when we were in high school.

You know, Brenda,
you're a real turn on.

When I saw you today, I
knew I had to have you.

Me, too.

Oh, I've always
admired you, Lance,

football hero, senior
class president.

This may sound corny,

but the truth is
you were my idol.

And you never even noticed
me, chubby little Brenda.

Sure I did. How
could I miss you then?

But what a change, huh?

All I ever thought
about was you.

And then came the day
you asked me to the prom.

I was so thrilled. All those
pretty girls you could have asked.

Only you chose me. On top
of the world, that's where I was.

You could have had
me then if you'd wanted.

But...

I guess I should have
known something was up

when you showed
up at the house drunk.

Brenda, I... Tell me,

do I look like an
oversized mackerel now?

Believe me, Brenda,
I'm really sorry.

I do believe you, Lance.

What's more,

I'm right back where
I was 10 years ago.

Yeah, where's that?

Can't you guess?

I've still got a thing
for you, Lance.

Well, then what are we
waiting for, baby? Let's get it on.

In a minute. I have to
explain things to Bernie.

After all, he did bring me.

Get everybody and we'll meet
in my bungalow in an hour.

Hey, what's wrong?

Let's just say I
hate to waste time.

Oh, boy, a woman
after my own heart.

Why don't you go
into the bedroom

and slip into something
more comfortable?

I thought the girl was
supposed to do that.

In the bottom
drawer of the dresser

there's a pair of men's
pajamas, black silk.

Nothing turns me on more
than a man in black silk pajamas.

Wait, you carry them
with you on trips?

Never hurts to be prepared.

Besides, they send
me crawling up the wall.

I just hope you won't have
to peel me off the ceiling.

This is gonna be a
reunion to end all reunions.

How're you doing?

Just great.

Just great.

Boy, you really don't
waste time, do you?

I've already wasted 10 years
where you and I are concerned.

For the longest time I didn't
know if I could forgive you, Lance.

But after one look at you
today, something happened.

I can only describe it
as animal magnetism.

You've got that
magnetism, Lance.

More than any other
man I've ever met.

Yeah, well, you're not
so bad yourself, Brenda.

You know, it's really hard for me to
believe that you're the same chick.

So, when are you gonna
come in here and visit me?

I'm not. You have
to come and get me.

Being chased, that's
what turns you on?

That's it.

Well, ready or not, here I come.

No, not yet!

There's one more
thing I really get off on.

What? What's that?

Bald-headed men.

Oh, if only you were a
skinhead like Yul Brynner.

Talk about a woman going wild.

I'm bald. I'm a bald guy.

Look, check it out, baby. Look.

Surprise!

Surprise!

Look at old Lance.

Hey, Lance! MAN 3:
Hey, old boy! All right.

Looks like Yul Brynner.
Do you believe it?

Bernie, what are
you doing out here?

I've been looking
all over for you.

What is it? What's wrong?

Well, it's what you did
to Lance, that's what.

Oh, I see. And you don't
think it was very nice of me.

Is that it?

Look, Lance is... He's a turkey.

But he's...

Well, he's still a
human being, Brenda.

I don't believe this!
You're defending him!

What about what he did to me at
the senior prom? You said yourself...

Brenda, all you
accomplished tonight was

to lower yourself to his
level. Don't you see that?

Lance hurt me.
He really hurt me.

I just wanted to pay him back.

So you conned him.

And you led him on with
good looks and everything.

You even used
me to help pull it off.

Well, I don't know, Brenda, but to
me that's just... That's being a phony.

And a phony is something I
thought you could never be.

I'm sorry things
turned out like this.

I'm gonna get something to eat.

Bernie!

I say we do it.

I know you can beat Joey with
one hand tied behind your back

but I'm not taking any chances
on blowing the championship.

I can take him. You don't have
to pay Joey to go in the tank.

I say we do.

Joey takes a dive in the third
round. He gave me his word on it.

You liar! It's not true!

Hey, wait a minute.
You liar! It's not true!

What's the matter with this kid?

Hey, hey. What's going on?

He says you're gonna
take a dive in the third round.

Explain the facts
of life to him, Darcy.

It's not true,
Dad. It's not true!

Look, tell him anything,
but shut him up, will you?

Or we're all in hot water.

Dad, it's not true. Say it!

Dad, please, say it!

Mitch, I...

Dad, please!

Mitch?

Look, Son,

this... I mean, it just
came out of left field.

Fifty thousand bucks.

You don't have any idea
what kind of money that is.

I mean, I can work
those docks until I drop

and I'd never be able to
save that kind of money.

And I was thinking that...

Hey, I was thinking

we'd buy the boat.

Huh? And we'd go
right down to Florida.

Just like we always wanted to.

You finally get
your second chance

and you quit in the third round.

Look, I'd give anything if I
could beat Malone, but I can't.

I'm over the hill, Mitch.
Don't you understand that?

Your old man
can't cut it anymore.

If I'd have known you
were gonna take a dive,

I wouldn't have even
saved up for my fantasy.

What do you mean? What fantasy?

To have you win
the championship.

What do you mean? You
mean you set this thing up?

No, you didn't.
That's impossible.

Mr. Roarke can do
anything. It is so possible.

That's how you knocked down
Jackson Malone at the sparring practice.

But why?

Why is it so important for me
to fight for the championship?

I thought it was
because I love you.

Now I'm not so sure anymore.

Mitch!

Hello? ROARKE:
Hello, Miss Richards?

Hi, Mr. Roarke.

It's almost 3:00, Miss Richards.

The witching hour, when I turn
back into an oversized mackerel.

Is everything all right?

Mmm, not really.

But there's nothing
you can do about it.

I'll be along in just a minute.

I know, not a second past 3:00.

Bye.

Hello.

Hi.

Thought you'd be gone by now.

Oh, well, I decided to
take an afternoon plane.

May I come in?

Just for a minute. Okay.

What's with your clothes?

It's a long story.

Say, I heard about what you
did last night after I left the dance.

Making a public apology to Lance
and resigning as alumni queen.

Took guts.

Revenge isn't sweet,
Bernie. It stinks.

Well, I know I
was rough on you...

Oh, Bernie, please... No...

Everything you said was true.

No.

No, I called you a phony,
Brenda, and that's not true.

Tell you something else, too.

To me you're still the most
beautiful girl in the world.

No, I'm not.

I'm not beautiful at all.

Bernie,

this body you see
here, it isn't mine.

Mr. Roarke just loaned it to me.

That's right, what you
see here is my fantasy.

I just wanted to be thin and
beautiful so I could zap poor Lance.

But no matter how
it seemed last night,

I really did want to go
to the dance with you.

Bernie, you can't see
me! Get out of here!

No, no, no, I'm staying. It
took me too long to get...

Bernie! Up the
courage to come here

and I'm gonna stay here.

Wait! Wait! Wait! Wait!

Wait! Brenda,
where're you going?

Brenda! Hey, Brenda,
come back here!

Hey, Brenda! Hey,
Brenda! Wait a minute!

Hey, wait up! Hey,
Brenda, hold on a sec!

Brenda! Slow down! Brenda!

Brenda, wait a minute!
Come on back here!

Brenda!

Hey, Brenda, don't run so
fast. Brenda, wait a minute.

Brenda! Wait a minute.

What do you think of your
most beautiful girl now?

I think she's
fantastic. Brenda, wait.

Just... Just listen to me.

Wanna talk about
phonies? I'm no stockbroker.

I'm an English teacher.

I was just pretending
to be something I wasn't

because of the way you
looked on the outside.

I've always loved you, Brenda.

Fat, thin, doesn't make
any difference to me.

You really mean that?

Here. I'm gonna
give this to you.

Oh, Bernie. A book of poetry.

I added an inscription.

"May we live every verse and rhyme
together now and throughout time."

Thank you.

Well, here we go, sports fans.

This could be the
donnybrook of the decade.

To the center of the ring
and here's Jimmy Lennon.

Ladies and gentlemen, Fantasy
Island presents 15 rounds of boxing

for the Heavy Weight
Championship of the World.

Introducing...

Opey, have you seen Mitch yet?

No, Joey, I haven't.

You're sure?

Yes, I'm sure.

Okay. Okay.

Weighing in at 194 pounds

the challenger, Joey Lee.

And his opponent in the
opposite corner, defending his title,

weighing in at 218 pounds,

wearing red trunks
with a white stripe,

the Heavy Weight Champion
of the World, Jackson Malone.

And now all we're waiting
for is the bell for round one.

And here we go! Both fighters
out to the center of the ring.

A left to the head
by the champion.

Another left, another left to
the head by the champion.

Lee counters with
a right to the body.

A left to the head by the
champion. A left to the body...

Mitch?

Oh, hi, Mr. Roarke.

Why aren't you at the fight?

I don't want to see it.

Why not?

It isn't gonna turn out right.

But you wanted your father
to win the championship,

and it's happening
this very moment.

Mr. Roarke, the fight's fixed.

Mitch,

I believe your father loves
you more than anything.

And I also believe that you can
stop him from throwing the fight.

How? By being there.

Joey Lee could never throw a
fight with you there looking on.

He's too decent and
honorable a man.

Do you really mean
that, Mr. Roarke?

Oh, I really mean it, Mitch.

I have a car waiting. We
could be there within minutes.

Then let's go.

Malone fires another
shot to the head.

Another, another, another.
Four in a row to the head.

Lee comes back
with one to the body.

However, the champion is really
setting him up. He's toying with him.

A left that missed
by Lee to the body.

The champion comes back
with two more lefts to the head.

Another left to the head. They're
right above us in the corner.

Lee tries to get
in two body shots.

Next round, you go. Stay down.

Hard left and right
to the stomach hard.

Coming back again.

The champion goes out to the
center trying to force the fight.

And there's the bell
ending round two.

We'll be right back after
this word from our sponsor.

Hi, Dad. Mitch.

Mr. Roarke, why'd you
bring my kid down to see this?

See what?

Exactly what will your
son be seeing, Mr. Lee?

We're back in Fantasy
Island, fight fans,

just awaiting the bell for...

There it is, for round
three in this great fight.

Both fighters come out to
the center of the ring now

and Joey Lee is starting
in right off the bat.

He's got lefts and
rights to the champion.

He's got him in the
corner right above us.

Hard lefts and rights. Joey Lee
is a different fighter this round.

He's all over the champion.

Joey Lee is really
bringing the fight to Malone.

He's got him on the ropes.

And there's a hard left
and a right combination...

What are you trying to do?
You're supposed to go down here.

Hey, man, what're
you trying to do?

He's really... Down he goes.

One, two, three, four,

five, six...

And Joey Lee stands in the center
of the ring, waiting for the champion.

The champion...

Get him! Get him! Stay
away! Stay away from him!

What're you trying to do?

I wanna get my kid's respect.

They're talking to each other.

I don't know what
they're saying,

but they're talking to each
other. And now they break.

They come back
with a left by Joey Lee.

A right, then Lee
again. A left and a right.

He's got him back in the
corner and the champion is down!

The champion is down!

Malone is down.
It's unbelievable!

- Five, six...
- The count starts.

It has to be a mandatory...

seven, eight.

You all right,
champ? Yeah, yeah.

What do you think
he's doing, huh?

He's double-crossing us.
Cream him. Wipe him out.

Give him the beating of
his life. Take him apart.

I knew you could do it,
Dad. I knew you wouldn't quit.

As the lovely young lady
indicates, this is round four.

We're just waiting for the bell.

And there it is.

I told you that the donnybrook of
the century could be here tonight.

Both fighters come to
the center of the ring.

You're good, Joey.

A few years ago, maybe.

I'm sorry. I gotta
do it to you Joey.

What a topsy-turvy
fight this is.

Now, it's Malone.
Malone is really coming on.

He looks like the champion
he is supposed to be.

He is really firing them well.

Left to the head. Another left.

A left to the head of Lee.
He's taking Lee apart.

He's giving Lee the
beating of his life.

He's got him on the ropes right
above us. Solid combination.

Left and rights to the head.
Another left and right to the head.

Lee's face is a mess
of blood and bruises.

He's trying to
recover from them.

More coming from the champion.

The champion is
moving in for the kill.

What's holding Joey Lee
up there, I will never know.

It must be that wonderful
something called pride.

We're just waiting for
the bell, and there it is.

Round four is over. And,
oh, a punishing round.

A punishing round for
the challenger, Joey Lee.

Dad?

Dad, it doesn't matter
about being champ anymore.

Dad, please, just quit now.

Just don't even go in
there. I'm okay, Mitch.

I'm okay. Don't even
go in there, Dad.

Don't even get up
when the bell rings.

I'm okay, Son.

Dad, please, you're
bleeding awful.

Looking over in
Joey Lee's corner,

I don't know how he will
ever be able to answer the bell

and come out for round five.

And there's the
bell for round five.

It's unbelievable, fight fans.

I don't know how he's coming
back out there, but there is Lee.

But the champion starts right
in on him just like the last round.

A left to the head. Another left
to the head. A right to the body.

Another left to the head. Another
left and a hard right to the head.

Go down, Joey!

The champion is really beating
him to death. How he's standing...

What's going on?
Go down! Stay down!

And still stay on his feet.
Another left to the head.

Another left. A
left to the body.

Big combination, left and
rights. Another big one.

And he's got him back in the
corner again. Hard left and right.

And there it is.
There goes Joey.

And he is down!

One... Please
call off my fantasy.

Two...

But you wanted to see your
father fight the champion.

But I don't want that anymore.

Five, six, seven, eight...

All right, Mitch. You're
fantasy is cancelled.

You're out!

And that's all she wrote. This
crowd is going absolutely wild.

Jimmy Lennon, stepping into the ring
to raise the hand of Jackson Malone,

the Heavy Weight Champion
of the World. We'll be right back.

Hey.

I'm sorry I didn't
win for you, Son.

I'm glad you didn't win, Dad.

Winning would have
meant more fights

and I don't want to ever
see you fighting again.

Well, Mr. Lee, sports
writers are saying

it was the fight of the decade.

The network is more than a little
pleased with your performance, Joey.

The network is also pleased

with the impression you made
during those pre-fight interviews.

They want to sign you to
work with Mr. Ames here,

providing background
and color for future fights.

Dad's gonna be a
sports announcer on TV?

If it pleases him.

Uh, sure.

But you gotta be kidding.

No, the contract's
already been drawn up.

My agent's
negotiating it for you.

And believe me, he's going to
get you some very good numbers.

I don't know what to say.

Why don't you say goodbye,
or you miss the plane.

Oh, yeah, yeah. Come on, Dad.

Thank you
Mr. Roarke. Yes, Mitch.

Mr. Roarke...
Good luck, Mr. Lee.

Thank you for everything.

Roarke. Mr. Ames. Bye.

Goodbye.

Thank you both so very much.

I think I learned more about
myself these past two days

than I did my whole life.

Well that does sound exciting.

Would you share some of
your discoveries with us?

Well, I discovered I really
like me, just the way I am.

What's more,

I found out I can be me

and still be loved.

May I ask what
your plans are now?

Well, first of all, we're
gonna take a tour of Europe.

A gourmet tour.

It's being sponsored by a
group called Fat is Fantastic.

And by the end of it, we're gonna be
the two most fantastic people going.

Thank you.

Bye-bye. Bye-bye.

So long, Miss Richards.

Well, Tattoo, it just goes to show
that beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

What does that mean?

It means that to me you
are six feet two inches tall.