Everybody Loves Raymond (1996–2005): Season 8, Episode 18 - Crazy Chin - full transcript

Hank and Pat ask Robert why he keeps touching his food to his chin before he eats it. Now the whole family is curious. Why does he do it?

Amy, this roast is so tasty.

Yes, honey, it is delicious.

Thanks.

Robert made the police
blotter this week.

Wow!
What went down, man?

A shootout with some
smack- and crackheads?

No no, nothing
so exciting.

It just said,
"Mailbox defaced.

Unit responded."

He was the unit.

Oh.



??? ???? ?????, ????
????? ????? ???? ????.

?? ??????

Why do you touch
your food to your chin

before you put it
in your mouth?

???!
-??, ?? ????, ?????.

??? ????, ?? ??? ????
?? ???.

??? ???? ??? ???? ?? ??,
??????

It's-- it's nothing. It's just
a little habit of mine, that's all.

??, ??? ??? ????? ???? ?? ??.

?? ????.

Every family
has their oddball.

?????? ?? ???.

??? ??? ??? ???? ?? ???

??? ????? ????? ?????
?? ????????? ?? ??????



Oh, that's silly, Hank.

He'd have a big red mark on his chin
every time the food was too hot.

?? ????.

?? ?? ?? ?????.

That's where his mouth was
when he got here. He's still growing.

How's everybody
like the sweet potatoes?

Hey, you'd better get 'em
before I eat 'em all up.

Cuckoo.
Cuckoo.

????, ?????.

I don't think
it's cuckoo at all.

?? ????? ????? ?? ????,
??????

I always thought that that chin thing
was just a nervous habit.

What did he have to be nervous about
last night?

????? ????? ???
?? ?????? ???.

??.

??? ???,

?? ?? ?? ??????
??? ??????? ????.

????? ?? ?? ???? ?? ?????? ????

??? ?? ?????

Robert Barone has
plenty of reasons

to develop a nervous
habit or two.

On top of everything else,
he's a policeman.

The chin thing is clearly
a manifestation of stress.

???

I took behavioral
psychology in college.

?? ?? ????? ???? ????? ????? ?????

Well, I don't know
if you can fix him,

but anything you can do
to make him less stressed,

??? ????? ??? ?? ????.

Why don't you get one of those funnels
that dogs wear around their neck

and just throw
the food in there?

Amy, let's go in there.

??? ??? ???? ????? ??????

who married a man
with stinkeroo feet

and a chin disorder.

???.
-????.

?? ??????

How was your day, Yogi?

Good. Pretty quiet.
Hit a little traffic coming home.

??? ??????.
??? ???? ?????.

?? ????.

?? ???? ????

Well, it just might be
your favorite food.

Ribs fra diavolo?

Rib steak
and mashed potatoes...

and bacon
and a key-lime pie.

??? ??? ????

??, ?? ??? ????,

and nobody's mom
or dad or brother.

??? ?? ????? ??.
??? ????? ?? ??????.

?? ??, ??? ???? ????.

You just relax because you've got
a big meal ahead of you,

???? ??...

Oh-hh.

?? ????? ???? ???
?? ????? ?? ????,

????? ???? ?? ?????.

Well, I know your job
can be very stressful,

so I wanna help
reduce the stress.

Well then, very nice.

I've been on the force
for 27 years, so I'm used to stress.

And you know my motto
when I'm on the beat:

Don't be afraid
to pull the trigger...

on your smile.

I love that motto.

??? ????.
?? ???.

??? ?????

??.
??? ?? ????????

????.

Is something wrong?

???

Well, you were touching
food to your chin.

??????

??? ???? ?? ?? ???.

????, ??? ??????, ??? ?????
????? ?? ?? ???? ????.

??? ?????
?? ???? ?? ??? ????.

??? ?? ???? ???? ?? ??? ?????
??? ?????

???? ????? ???.

??? ?? ????? ?? ???? ????

?? ??? ?? ????,
????? ????? ?????.

?? ??? ????? "?????"?
?? ?? "?????"?

Nobody. Just some
of us were talking.

Who was talking?
Who's the "some of us" who were talking?

?? ??? ????...

????

...?????.
-?????

???? ????? ????
?? ??? ?????

Wait, why does Debra
bother you more than Ray?

You know, you care way too much
about her opinion.

What I care about is you traveling
the countryside going,

"Who has a cure
for my husband, the loon?"

??? ?? ?????? ?????.

??? ?? ???? ?????.

But wouldn't it
be good to finally

deal with your
little chin problem?

????,
?? ????? ?? ?? ?????

Was that the verdict
in Ray and Debra's kangaroo court?

?????, ?????.

?? ????? ??? ?? ?????

?? ????? ???

???? ?? ?? ????!

?????.

?? ?? ??? ??? ??????

??? ?? ????? ???.
-???? ??.

?? ?? ????? ???.

??? ????? ?????.

???, ??? ????.

?????!

???? ?? ?? ????? ??? ????? ???,
??? ?? ??,

??? ??? ????? ?????
???? ???? ?? ?? ??.

?? ???? ?? ????? ?????,

?? ??? ???? ????.

?????, ?????.
??? ??? ?????

??? ???? ???? ??? ???
?????? ??? ?????.

?? ?????? ???? ??? ????!

?? ???, ????
-??, ???? ???.

?? ????
???? ??? ?????? ??????.

?? ?? ????? ??.

???? ????.

So? Hose him off.
We'll roll him back in the ocean.

???, ?? ???? ????

Robbie and Amy had a big fight
and he spent the night here.

?? ????

??? ?? ?????.
??? ?? ???? ?? ????.

??? ???? ??? ?? ????? ????.

??? ?? ???? ???? ???!

I finally had the both
of you out of the house.

There was only
one more to go.

He's ruining
his life again.

I don't know what's wrong
with my boys

that they have so much trouble
with women.

???!

?? ?????? ?????? ????.

????? ?? ?? ?????
????? ?? ????? ?? ???.

Hello, problem solvers.

???

?????.
????? ?????

?? ??????, ???.
?? ????? ?? ?? ??????

Because they are so perfect
and without flaw,

they get together with, say,
somebody's wife,

and they make her believe
that her husband belongs

in a rubber room
with a chin guard.

It's quite a gift.

She should've just
got the dog funnel.

?????, ????? ??? ?????.

??? ????? ??? ??????? ?? ?...

Boop-be-de-boo.

Look, all I know is when I left for work
yesterday morning,

my wife was fine with me.

After an hour with you two, she wanted
to strap me into a bed at Bellevue.

?????,
?? ???? ?????.

Yeah, you couldn't fit
into one of those beds.

How about I fit you
into a jelly jar.

- Oh, a jelly jar?
- Have you ever been in a jelly jar?

- Then we'll go in!
- I go in for nothing!

?????, ?????.

????? ?????? ???????.

?? ???? ??? ?? ?????
?????? ????? ?? ??????

??!

??? ?????? ?????? ????? ??

???? ???? ?????? ?? ????

?????.

???? ?????? ?????? ??????
????? ?? ?????? ???? ???? ????

and let him blend into
society as best he can.

???? ?????.

?????.
-???.

??? ?????
??? ????.

??, ??? ??? ???? ?? ?????

???? ???? ???? ????? ????

????? ?? ????? ???.

???.

?? ????, ???.

??, ?? ?? ????.

????? ?????? ??????.
??? ??? ??? ?? ???? ???? ?? ?????.

????, ?????,

I did a lot of thinking
last night,

???? ??????.

????? ????.

You've been doing
your little... thing a lot more lately--

?? ???? ?????? ??? ?? ?????? ???

?? ?????? ?????.

??? ??? ????? ?????? ??????? ???

???? ???? ????? ????.

??, ?????,
?? ?? ???? ?????.

Yeah. I hate being married,
and I don't do any goofy crap.

??.

No, it makes
perfect sense.

All you have to do is remember
the 13 times we broke up

to see that maybe Robert's
not comfortable with commitment.

I tried to help you
overcome all that,

??? ???? ????? ???????.

?????, ?????.

??, ?? ????.

?? ????.
??? ????? ????? ????.

?? ??? ?? ????? ????? ????.

?? ??? ??????.

Listen, I lost my temper last night,
and I shouldn't have.

And all those things
I said about you, they're not true.

You have the cutest
walk I've ever seen

??? ?? ????? ??? ????.

?? ??? ?? ????? ??????

??????, ????, ??? ?????.

??? ???? ????.

??? ????? ????.

??? ???? ?? ?????.
??????? ?????.

?? ??? ??????? ??????,
??-??.

?? ????? ??????.

??? ?? ??????, ??? ????,
??? ????,

maybe that'll be
the end of... crazy chin.

??? ??? ??? ??? ??????? ??????.

?? ?? ??? ??????

??? ???? ???

??? ????? ????? ???? ?????

?????,
???? ??, ?????,

??? ??? ???? ??? ???? ?? ???

Uh, have you not
been following?

No, I mean, I understand
about stress.

But of all the things
you could do to deal with stress,

you know, like grind your teeth
or bite your nails...

...pull your hair out.

??? ???? ??? ??? ???????
??????

I mean, why do you do
that specific thing?

??? ??? ???? ??
????? ????? ????

Because the voices tell me to.
You happy now?

?? ?????? ????

Guys, maybe we should just
leave it well enough alone.

You call that well enough?

Come on, Robert, tell us.
I wanna know.

Why do you do
the monkey move?

??? ?? ????.

????, ????? ?????.
??? ???? ????? ???.

??? ?? ????!

??? ???? ?? ???? ???????
?????? ???? ???? ?? ??.

It was Easter
and I was, like, five.

And Mom, she made
the mistake

of leaving me and Robert
alone with our Easter baskets,

so we just started shoving candy
in our mouths as fast as we could.

And Robert was touching
everything to his chin.

????? ?? ?? ???, ??? ??? ?????
???? ?????? "?? ??????"?

Anyway, Mom comes in
and goes,

"You two weren't eating candy
before dinner, were you?"

And we played it
totally cool.

?????,
"??, ???, ??".

And I thought, "For sure we're gonna
get away with it."

Then I look up, and sticking
to Robert's chin

is the tail of
a marshmallow duck.

??? ????? ???? ??
????? ????

????? ?? ??????? ???? ?????? ?????.

?? ??? ??????.

Okay, so wait.

Robert, maybe you were nervous
about being caught by Marie

and so you...
forgot how to eat?

?????

?? ?? ????? ?????'?

What was it, one of those
hair colleges?

Robert was doing it
before then anyway.

??? ???? ??? ???,

Oh God, it's like
the special psycho edition

of "This is Your Life."

I remember one time
I took him to the lodge,

and he spotted a jar
of pickles on the bar.

?? ???? ?? ???

???? ????? ????? ?? ??.

And all my buddies start feeding him
more pickles to watch him do it.

???? ?????? ???

Turns out those pickles
were on that bar

when the lodge
opened in 1952.

????? ???? ??? ???? ???????.

?? ???.

Does that solve
your mystery?

No, but now I know
why Robert screams at pickles.

??, ?? ?????? ????.

candy and pickles...

It's like watching
Freud work.

See, I never cared
how the food got in the boys' mouth,

as long as they ate.

But I remember dinnertime.

Raymond would be sitting
in his little high chair,

and Frank always had
to work late back then.

It was a wonderful time.

And I would feed Raymond
his sweet potatoes and peas,

and you'd make
the cutest faces.

I'm telling you, he should've been
on commercials.

He was so much cuter
than that Gerber baby.

Oh, I was not cuter.
We were both cute.

I remember I gave
a big spoonful,

?????? ?????,

"??? ???? ????????

- in for a 'wanding."'
- Ma, please.

- Come on, your "airpwane's wanding."
- Stop it.

??????.
-?????.

??.

???.
????.

???? ???? ????.

We don't want the airline
to lose your luggage.

There.

There's that cute face.

??? ???, ????.

?? ???.

???,

where was Robert when you were feeding
cute little Raymond?

??? ?? ?????.

How about this:
Marie, before Ray was born,

do you remember doing
the airplane thing to Robert?

???.

So isn't it possible

that while you were
wiping Ray's chin,

Robert was feeling
neglected?

And that's when he started
taking care of himself.

?? ??? ????, ?????,

when Ray came along,
you started touching food to your chin

as a subconscious way of trying
to get your mother's attention again.

And now that's your way
of dealing with any kind of stress.

?? ???? ??????, ?????

See, I told you
I would get it!

??? ??????, ?????.

?? ???? ??????

?? ?? ???? ?????

??? ???, ?????.

No? My kid brother arrives,
and from then on,

I gotta rub lunch
on my face?

Robert, I know it doesn't
seem like it right now,

but this is a good
moment for you.

You understand something
about yourself,

and now that you
understand it,

you can stop if you want.

??, ??? ??? ????

?????? ?????? ?????

?????? ??? ??? ??
?????? ?? ?? ???.

?????, ???????.

Happy "wanding."

- Hey there, cubby.
- Hey.

What? What's with you?

Oh, nothing.

I'm just thinking about
that chin thing that I do.

That's right.
I'm talking about it.

That's the first step
in getting over something--

acceptance and talking.

I'm seeing
Dr. Greenberg.

Oh, that's good.
Great.

He made me realize
that just because

I have legitimate excuses
for doing something

doesn't mean I have
to keep on doing it.

Starting today, I'm not touching
any food to my chin.

All right. Okay.

All right, good.
Good for you.

The Knicks are crazy if they don't
renew his contract.

Did you see Ray Barone's
column about that?

Hey hey hey,
he's talking about me.

- Yeah, he was right on the money.
- Usually is.

I think Ray Barone's
the best columnist in New York

hands down.

And that's the end of the the quarter
with the Knicks up by five.

Oh, man, why wasn't
I taping that?

Yeah, that was good.
Good for you, Raymond.