Everybody Loves Raymond (1996–2005): Season 3, Episode 26 - How They Met - full transcript
Flashback to how Ray and Debra met.
Oh, what's
for dinner?
- Lemon chicken.
- Again?
- What did you make?
- Nothin'.
- Hey, daddy.
- Hey, pooky. Hi.
How was school?
- Good.
- Ally made a new friend--
daniel.
- Daniel? A boy.
- He's coming over
on Saturday.
- Coming over, yeah?
Don't you think
you should, like,
Meet for coffee
and see how that goes?
- [laughs]
- Well, ally,
I'm looking forward
To meeting your
gentleman caller,
And I hope daniel realizes
That he's getting involved
with a very special young lady.
- Don't worry, honey.
Daddy won't be here
when he comes over.
- Good.
- You're gonna want me there
When it's time to pay
for the wedding, though,
Aren't you?
Yeah.
- So, hey, ally asked
that boy to come over?
That's a little forward there,
don't you think?
- Oh, please.
If women waited
for men to ask,
The entire species
would die out.
- What are you
talking about?
We wouldn't have
gotten together
If it wasn't for me.
- You? We got together
in spite of you.
- No.
Get outta here.
It was all me, okay?
I came, I saw,
I conquered, baby.
- You know, as much
as I would like to blame you,
Us getting together
is my fault.
- That's not the way
I remember it.
- That's exactly
how it happened.
- No. No, no.
- Yes. What?
- Don't you remember?
Okay, listen,
I got to shower,
So it'll be, like,
20 minutes.
Okay. Bye.
[doorbell rings]
Yes?
- Hey, got your
futon delivery.
- Oh. I forgot
that was today.
Um, okay, bring it in.
- Don't drag it, dopey.
The lady paid for it
already.
- Slow down.
Let me get a grip on it.
- Where's this goin'?
- Um, like somewhere in here.
- You got to tell me
when you're dropping it.
Come on, you've been
doing that all day.
- What are you doing?
- Nothing.
Hey, how are you?
- I'll go get
the frame.
- Okay.
I delivered one of these
to cher yesterday.
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.
She wasn't there.
Her assistant
was there.
I'm not really
a futon guy.
I'm gonna
be a writer.
- You know, now that
I think about it,
Can you just put it
over there instead?
- Yeah.
I can do that now.
- You can?
- Yeah. Yeah.
I don't need him.
- Yeah. That would
be great.
- So, where
do you want it?
- [screams]
Oh! I'm sorry!
Wait. Are you okay?
- I'm fine, I'm fine.
What are you doing?
- I don't know.
- What are you doing?
- Give me a hand.
- Pick it up.
Pick it up.
I'm sorry.
Are you okay?
- Yeah, I'm fine.
- You sure?
- Yeah. Fine.
All right, I'm sorry.
- Don't worry about it.
- Hey, lucky I'm not delivering
your refrigerator.
[both laugh]
- Okay, could you just
excuse me for a minute?
- Yeah. We got it.
Go ahead.
Yeah, you go
run for cover.
She's pretty, man.
- Yeah, I could see why
you'd want to smother her
With the futon.
- She's different,
though.
She's, like, different
kind of pretty.
You know, natural,
walk-on-the-beach,
Have-a-wine-cooler,
kind of pretty, you know?
- Let's get the frame
started.
Then you can
write her a poem.
- She laughed
at my joke, man.
You see that?
She laughed.
You think she's got
a boyfriend?
- I don't know.
Check out
the pictures.
- I don't see any guys.
There's no guys.
Hey, maybe
she likes women.
- Nah,
if she was like that,
She'd be putting
this thing together herself.
Ask her out,
big nose.
- No, what?
Her? Go out with me?
No, no, no.
Yeah?
- Stranger things
have happened.
I can't think of any.
- Nah. I live
with my parents.
- Fine.
Then I'll ask her out.
- No. No. You can't.
- Why not?
- 'cause.
You're the futon guy.
- You're the assistant
futon guy.
I'm asking her out.
- No. I'll do it.
She laughed
at my joke, man.
I'm gonna do it.
So...
I'll get
the clipboard thing,
And then I can
write that thing down.
- [laughing]
- What?
- Nothing.
My friend
is all nervous
'cause he likes you
or something.
He wants
to ask you out.
- Oh. Really?
- What?
You got a boyfriend?
- No, it's just that...
- Let me ask you
something.
You think you could put
this thing together yourself?
- I got it.
Got the forms. Okay.
All right.
Gianni, you almost done now?
Let me help you.
- No, no, no--I got it.
You do what
you got to do.
- Okay.
Okay.
Hey, music.
You like music?
- Uh, yeah.
- Yeah, me, too.
Music is good. Yeah.
It's a nice apartment
you got here.
- Oh, thanks.
- It's a nice
neighborhood.
A lot of nice places
to eat around here.
- Yeah, I know.
- You know what's good?
That chinese place
With the crazy grandmother
who screams at you.
- Oh, yeah, china star.
Oh, I love that place.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
You know what
she's screaming?
- Yeah. "habba nye dah!"
She's cra--
She's crazy.
- She's saying,
"have a nice day."
- Oh.
Oh.
Maybe she's not
crazy, then.
- I love that place.
- Yeah. Me, too.
So...
You almost done,
gianni, or what?
- Are you?
- So maybe I'll see you
there sometime, hmm?
- Where?
- China star.
- Oh, well, yeah.
If you're in there,
and I'm in there,
Then, yeah.
You got to sign, um...
- Okay.
- I'll probably be there
for lunch tomorrow.
You talking about it
made me really hungry for it.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
- Actually, I just had
chinese today.
- Oh, my god.
- But sometimes, when I go back
two days in a row,
I just--I order something
different, you know?
Like shrimp.
So if I was
to go back there
And order
the shrimp,
Would you want to...
Go with me?
- Yeah. Sure.
- Yeah?
Oh, great. Great.
I told you I was gonna be
a writer, right?
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
What a way with words.
Let's go.
- All right, okay.
All right,
so then, what,
Like, 1:00 tomorrow?
- Yeah. That'd be great.
- Okay. Good.
All right.
Good. Great.
So, then tomorrow.
1:00. Right?
- Oh. I'm ray.
- I'm debra.
- Hi.
Nice to meet you.
Okay, so tomorrow, then.
- Yeah, great.
- All right.
Good, great.
Habba nye dah!
[both laugh]
Hoo hoo hoo!
Am I the man,
or what?
- Oh, yeah,
you're the man.
You should have
your genitals revoked.
- [as muhammad ali]
oh, I'm so pretty.
I'm so pretty.
I'm so pretty.
- Hey, beautiful.
You forgot
to give her the futon cover.
- Oh. Oh, yeah.
[water running]
- coming.
- What?
- Coming.
Aah!
- Oh!
- What do you want?
What are you doing?
- You said, "come in."
- I said, "coming."
- It sounded like
"come in."
- What's up?
- Would you
excuse me, please?
- Okay, I'm sorry.
Look, I didn't see anything.
- Yes, you did.
- I know. I'm sorry.
- Totally naked?
- Yup.
- Totally naked?
A beautiful woman,
totally naked,
Facing you.
- Yes.
- Another gift
for raymond.
I burst into places
all the time.
I raid
massage parlors.
You know who I get
to see naked?
Fat guys.
Fat, hairy,
bald guys.
You get to go out
with a naked girl.
- Oh, I'm not going
out with her.
Are you kidding?
She thinks I'm a pervert.
- And she's the one
running around naked.
- In her own apartment.
No, I didn't turn away
fast enough.
- Well, how fast
did you turn?
- I don't know.
Like this. Ooh!
- Where's the turn?
- Oh, my god.
I didn't turn!
I didn't even turn.
See? Forget it.
There's no way I could
ever go out with her.
- Yes, you can.
- No. The whole time,
She'll know that all
I'm thinking about
Is her breasts.
- Well, don't
think about them.
- "don't think about them."
Yeah. Don't think
about zebras.
Go.
- Wow.
- Yeah. See?
What are
you thinking about?
- A zebra with breasts.
- That's it.
That's why.
There's no way I can
go out with her.
- Listen, you have to.
You've achieved more
before the first date
Than I usually do
By the end
of a relationship.
- Forget it.
I already called.
I canceled anyway.
I left a message
on her machine.
- Seems like a terrible waste
of a naked girl.
- Robbie, your father's
coming home soon.
- Yeah?
- You're sitting
in his chair.
You know
how upset he gets
If he sees your imprint
in his chair.
[doorbell rings]
- Ah, he can kiss my imprint.
- It's just that
he's working so hard.
That's all.
I can't wait till
your father retires.
Oh, he's gonna be so much
more pleasant then.
- Well, hello there.
- Hi. Is this 319 fowler?
- Why, yes, it is.
May I help you?
- Yeah.
I'm looking for ray barone.
- Of course you are.
Come in.
Raymond!
Girl!
- There's a girl here
for raymond?
- What's going on?
Oh.
Hi.
- [chuckles]
who is this?
- Hi. I'm debra whelan.
Ray delivered
a futon to me.
- Oh.
- What?
- Oh, nothing.
Just...Thinking
about zebras.
- Wouldn't you like
to introduce us
To your friend,
raymond?
- Uh, this is...
My...
Marie and robert.
My roommates.
How, uh...
What are you
doing here?
- Well, I went
to the futon store,
And your friend told me
that I could find you here.
Is there someplace
that we could talk?
- Uh, yeah.
I guess so, yeah.
- If I knew you were going
to have a visitor,
I would've laid out
a nicer pair of pants for you.
- So, um, hi.
- How come you
canceled our lunch?
- Well, I didn't
think you--
- Is it because
you saw me naked?
Admit it: You don't
want to go out with me
Because
you saw me naked.
- No! No--I mean, yes--
- Well, just so you know,
I don't look
like that.
- What?
- It was like a bad angle,
bad lighting.
I hadn't showered yet.
That's not how I look.
- What do you mean?
Well, you looked great--
not that I looked.
- Then how come
you canceled?
- Because...I was in
over my head anyway.
I was thinking
you'd think
I'm just some
futon guy,
And then you throw
pervert on top--
- Well, you should've let me
be the one to cancel.
That's the decent
thing to do
When you see
someone naked.
The naked person
gets to cancel.
- I didn't know that.
- All right.
Forget it.
Oh, and by the way,
There's something wrong
with that stupid futon.
The right leg
is so loose.
- All right.
You want me to fix it?
- Well, somebody better,
'cause I got the warranty.
- Okay. All right.
I'll fix it tomorrow.
I mean, I'm the futon guy.
- It was nice
to meet you both.
- So, uh, what time
tomorrow, then?
- I get home from work
about 6:00.
- That's no good.
Raymond eats at 6:00.
- Ma, do you mind?
6:00 is good.
- Okay.
- Okay, dear.
Lovely meeting you.
- She's not the girl
for you, raymond.
[doorbell rings]
- Who is it?
- It's, uh, ray from
claude's futons.
- Yeah, come in.
I said, come in.
- Okay,
now it really sounds
Like you're saying,
"come in."
- Yeah,
I did say "come in."
Hi.
- Hi.
- Hey, you're all dressed up.
- Oh, yeah,
the other time,
Those were
my delivery clothes.
Yeah, this is what I wear
when I fix stuff.
- All right.
- Okay.
Stupid dressed-up moron.
- What?
- So it's the right leg
that's loose?
- Yeah, it's the right one.
- Okay.
Nothing really seems
to be loose here.
- Oh. Sure seemed
loose to me.
- You know what?
I can't even tighten
these any more, really.
- Huh. I thought
it was loose.
- No.
- You know, it looks like
I made too much food here,
If you're, um, hungry.
- Oh. Yeah?
- Yeah. You want some?
- All right.
Yeah, wrap it up.
I'll eat it
in the truck.
- Okay.
I mean, you could eat it
here if you want.
- Oh.
Okay.
- You can sit.
- Sit? Sit here?
- Yeah. That's good.
- All right.
- You need me to help
with anything?
- No. I got it.
- Can I ask you
something?
- Yeah, sure.
- Were you making
all that food for someone,
And they didn't
show up?
- They showed up.
Here you go.
- So...The futon
was never loose?
- Look, you know, I've been out
with a lot of guys,
Like stockbrokers
and athletes
And rich, famous,
good-looking guys--
- So you're going
the other way now?
- No, no.
I'm not going any way.
You just seem
like a nice guy.
That's all.
You are planning on being
a journalist, right?
- Oh, yeah. Yeah.
- It's not as much fun
As knocking people over
with futons, but...
[both laugh]
- Actually, I'm gonna
be a sportswriter.
- Oh, really?
- Yeah. You like sports?
- Well, I do p.R.
For the rangers.
- Really?
- Yeah.
- So you know, like,
vanbiesbrouck and larouche?
- Yeah. All those guys.
- Wow.
- So, your family
seemed nice.
- Yeah. Yeah.
They seem nice.
I'm only living with them
until, you know...
- Yeah. Sure.
- Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah.
Wow. This is great.
This is--what is this?
- Oh, it's lemon chicken.
- Oh, man.
Wow.
- Yeah? You really
like it, huh?
- I could eat this
the rest of my life.
What?
- Nobody's ever really
liked my cooking before.
- Well, they're nuts.
Are you kidding?
This is great.
I'll probably--
can I have more?
- Yeah, sure.
- No, let me get it.
- No. I got it.
I can get it.
Hey, you want
something to drink?
- Yeah. Yeah. Well,
let me get that.
Okay. The glasses
are right there.
- Okay. Ice?
- Yeah, that'd be great.
[plates clatter]
- I like the round cubes
with the holes in them.
Those are my favorite
kind of cubes.
Oh!
Agh!
Are you okay?
- Yeah, I'm fine.
You keep
knocking me down.
- I know. I know.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
Ah, are you all right?
- Yeah.
You're a good kisser.
- All right.
You're in shock.
- Listen, I don't want you
to think I'm like this,
'cause I'm not.
- Me, neither.
- I mean, if this
goes anywhere,
It's gonna be
at least six months
Before you see me
naked again.
- It's okay.
I just want some more
of that chicken.
- Okay.
- [sighs]
Here's some
more chicken.
How is it?
- Great.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
Still great.
- And you're still
a good kisser.
for dinner?
- Lemon chicken.
- Again?
- What did you make?
- Nothin'.
- Hey, daddy.
- Hey, pooky. Hi.
How was school?
- Good.
- Ally made a new friend--
daniel.
- Daniel? A boy.
- He's coming over
on Saturday.
- Coming over, yeah?
Don't you think
you should, like,
Meet for coffee
and see how that goes?
- [laughs]
- Well, ally,
I'm looking forward
To meeting your
gentleman caller,
And I hope daniel realizes
That he's getting involved
with a very special young lady.
- Don't worry, honey.
Daddy won't be here
when he comes over.
- Good.
- You're gonna want me there
When it's time to pay
for the wedding, though,
Aren't you?
Yeah.
- So, hey, ally asked
that boy to come over?
That's a little forward there,
don't you think?
- Oh, please.
If women waited
for men to ask,
The entire species
would die out.
- What are you
talking about?
We wouldn't have
gotten together
If it wasn't for me.
- You? We got together
in spite of you.
- No.
Get outta here.
It was all me, okay?
I came, I saw,
I conquered, baby.
- You know, as much
as I would like to blame you,
Us getting together
is my fault.
- That's not the way
I remember it.
- That's exactly
how it happened.
- No. No, no.
- Yes. What?
- Don't you remember?
Okay, listen,
I got to shower,
So it'll be, like,
20 minutes.
Okay. Bye.
[doorbell rings]
Yes?
- Hey, got your
futon delivery.
- Oh. I forgot
that was today.
Um, okay, bring it in.
- Don't drag it, dopey.
The lady paid for it
already.
- Slow down.
Let me get a grip on it.
- Where's this goin'?
- Um, like somewhere in here.
- You got to tell me
when you're dropping it.
Come on, you've been
doing that all day.
- What are you doing?
- Nothing.
Hey, how are you?
- I'll go get
the frame.
- Okay.
I delivered one of these
to cher yesterday.
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.
She wasn't there.
Her assistant
was there.
I'm not really
a futon guy.
I'm gonna
be a writer.
- You know, now that
I think about it,
Can you just put it
over there instead?
- Yeah.
I can do that now.
- You can?
- Yeah. Yeah.
I don't need him.
- Yeah. That would
be great.
- So, where
do you want it?
- [screams]
Oh! I'm sorry!
Wait. Are you okay?
- I'm fine, I'm fine.
What are you doing?
- I don't know.
- What are you doing?
- Give me a hand.
- Pick it up.
Pick it up.
I'm sorry.
Are you okay?
- Yeah, I'm fine.
- You sure?
- Yeah. Fine.
All right, I'm sorry.
- Don't worry about it.
- Hey, lucky I'm not delivering
your refrigerator.
[both laugh]
- Okay, could you just
excuse me for a minute?
- Yeah. We got it.
Go ahead.
Yeah, you go
run for cover.
She's pretty, man.
- Yeah, I could see why
you'd want to smother her
With the futon.
- She's different,
though.
She's, like, different
kind of pretty.
You know, natural,
walk-on-the-beach,
Have-a-wine-cooler,
kind of pretty, you know?
- Let's get the frame
started.
Then you can
write her a poem.
- She laughed
at my joke, man.
You see that?
She laughed.
You think she's got
a boyfriend?
- I don't know.
Check out
the pictures.
- I don't see any guys.
There's no guys.
Hey, maybe
she likes women.
- Nah,
if she was like that,
She'd be putting
this thing together herself.
Ask her out,
big nose.
- No, what?
Her? Go out with me?
No, no, no.
Yeah?
- Stranger things
have happened.
I can't think of any.
- Nah. I live
with my parents.
- Fine.
Then I'll ask her out.
- No. No. You can't.
- Why not?
- 'cause.
You're the futon guy.
- You're the assistant
futon guy.
I'm asking her out.
- No. I'll do it.
She laughed
at my joke, man.
I'm gonna do it.
So...
I'll get
the clipboard thing,
And then I can
write that thing down.
- [laughing]
- What?
- Nothing.
My friend
is all nervous
'cause he likes you
or something.
He wants
to ask you out.
- Oh. Really?
- What?
You got a boyfriend?
- No, it's just that...
- Let me ask you
something.
You think you could put
this thing together yourself?
- I got it.
Got the forms. Okay.
All right.
Gianni, you almost done now?
Let me help you.
- No, no, no--I got it.
You do what
you got to do.
- Okay.
Okay.
Hey, music.
You like music?
- Uh, yeah.
- Yeah, me, too.
Music is good. Yeah.
It's a nice apartment
you got here.
- Oh, thanks.
- It's a nice
neighborhood.
A lot of nice places
to eat around here.
- Yeah, I know.
- You know what's good?
That chinese place
With the crazy grandmother
who screams at you.
- Oh, yeah, china star.
Oh, I love that place.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
You know what
she's screaming?
- Yeah. "habba nye dah!"
She's cra--
She's crazy.
- She's saying,
"have a nice day."
- Oh.
Oh.
Maybe she's not
crazy, then.
- I love that place.
- Yeah. Me, too.
So...
You almost done,
gianni, or what?
- Are you?
- So maybe I'll see you
there sometime, hmm?
- Where?
- China star.
- Oh, well, yeah.
If you're in there,
and I'm in there,
Then, yeah.
You got to sign, um...
- Okay.
- I'll probably be there
for lunch tomorrow.
You talking about it
made me really hungry for it.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
- Actually, I just had
chinese today.
- Oh, my god.
- But sometimes, when I go back
two days in a row,
I just--I order something
different, you know?
Like shrimp.
So if I was
to go back there
And order
the shrimp,
Would you want to...
Go with me?
- Yeah. Sure.
- Yeah?
Oh, great. Great.
I told you I was gonna be
a writer, right?
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
What a way with words.
Let's go.
- All right, okay.
All right,
so then, what,
Like, 1:00 tomorrow?
- Yeah. That'd be great.
- Okay. Good.
All right.
Good. Great.
So, then tomorrow.
1:00. Right?
- Oh. I'm ray.
- I'm debra.
- Hi.
Nice to meet you.
Okay, so tomorrow, then.
- Yeah, great.
- All right.
Good, great.
Habba nye dah!
[both laugh]
Hoo hoo hoo!
Am I the man,
or what?
- Oh, yeah,
you're the man.
You should have
your genitals revoked.
- [as muhammad ali]
oh, I'm so pretty.
I'm so pretty.
I'm so pretty.
- Hey, beautiful.
You forgot
to give her the futon cover.
- Oh. Oh, yeah.
[water running]
- coming.
- What?
- Coming.
Aah!
- Oh!
- What do you want?
What are you doing?
- You said, "come in."
- I said, "coming."
- It sounded like
"come in."
- What's up?
- Would you
excuse me, please?
- Okay, I'm sorry.
Look, I didn't see anything.
- Yes, you did.
- I know. I'm sorry.
- Totally naked?
- Yup.
- Totally naked?
A beautiful woman,
totally naked,
Facing you.
- Yes.
- Another gift
for raymond.
I burst into places
all the time.
I raid
massage parlors.
You know who I get
to see naked?
Fat guys.
Fat, hairy,
bald guys.
You get to go out
with a naked girl.
- Oh, I'm not going
out with her.
Are you kidding?
She thinks I'm a pervert.
- And she's the one
running around naked.
- In her own apartment.
No, I didn't turn away
fast enough.
- Well, how fast
did you turn?
- I don't know.
Like this. Ooh!
- Where's the turn?
- Oh, my god.
I didn't turn!
I didn't even turn.
See? Forget it.
There's no way I could
ever go out with her.
- Yes, you can.
- No. The whole time,
She'll know that all
I'm thinking about
Is her breasts.
- Well, don't
think about them.
- "don't think about them."
Yeah. Don't think
about zebras.
Go.
- Wow.
- Yeah. See?
What are
you thinking about?
- A zebra with breasts.
- That's it.
That's why.
There's no way I can
go out with her.
- Listen, you have to.
You've achieved more
before the first date
Than I usually do
By the end
of a relationship.
- Forget it.
I already called.
I canceled anyway.
I left a message
on her machine.
- Seems like a terrible waste
of a naked girl.
- Robbie, your father's
coming home soon.
- Yeah?
- You're sitting
in his chair.
You know
how upset he gets
If he sees your imprint
in his chair.
[doorbell rings]
- Ah, he can kiss my imprint.
- It's just that
he's working so hard.
That's all.
I can't wait till
your father retires.
Oh, he's gonna be so much
more pleasant then.
- Well, hello there.
- Hi. Is this 319 fowler?
- Why, yes, it is.
May I help you?
- Yeah.
I'm looking for ray barone.
- Of course you are.
Come in.
Raymond!
Girl!
- There's a girl here
for raymond?
- What's going on?
Oh.
Hi.
- [chuckles]
who is this?
- Hi. I'm debra whelan.
Ray delivered
a futon to me.
- Oh.
- What?
- Oh, nothing.
Just...Thinking
about zebras.
- Wouldn't you like
to introduce us
To your friend,
raymond?
- Uh, this is...
My...
Marie and robert.
My roommates.
How, uh...
What are you
doing here?
- Well, I went
to the futon store,
And your friend told me
that I could find you here.
Is there someplace
that we could talk?
- Uh, yeah.
I guess so, yeah.
- If I knew you were going
to have a visitor,
I would've laid out
a nicer pair of pants for you.
- So, um, hi.
- How come you
canceled our lunch?
- Well, I didn't
think you--
- Is it because
you saw me naked?
Admit it: You don't
want to go out with me
Because
you saw me naked.
- No! No--I mean, yes--
- Well, just so you know,
I don't look
like that.
- What?
- It was like a bad angle,
bad lighting.
I hadn't showered yet.
That's not how I look.
- What do you mean?
Well, you looked great--
not that I looked.
- Then how come
you canceled?
- Because...I was in
over my head anyway.
I was thinking
you'd think
I'm just some
futon guy,
And then you throw
pervert on top--
- Well, you should've let me
be the one to cancel.
That's the decent
thing to do
When you see
someone naked.
The naked person
gets to cancel.
- I didn't know that.
- All right.
Forget it.
Oh, and by the way,
There's something wrong
with that stupid futon.
The right leg
is so loose.
- All right.
You want me to fix it?
- Well, somebody better,
'cause I got the warranty.
- Okay. All right.
I'll fix it tomorrow.
I mean, I'm the futon guy.
- It was nice
to meet you both.
- So, uh, what time
tomorrow, then?
- I get home from work
about 6:00.
- That's no good.
Raymond eats at 6:00.
- Ma, do you mind?
6:00 is good.
- Okay.
- Okay, dear.
Lovely meeting you.
- She's not the girl
for you, raymond.
[doorbell rings]
- Who is it?
- It's, uh, ray from
claude's futons.
- Yeah, come in.
I said, come in.
- Okay,
now it really sounds
Like you're saying,
"come in."
- Yeah,
I did say "come in."
Hi.
- Hi.
- Hey, you're all dressed up.
- Oh, yeah,
the other time,
Those were
my delivery clothes.
Yeah, this is what I wear
when I fix stuff.
- All right.
- Okay.
Stupid dressed-up moron.
- What?
- So it's the right leg
that's loose?
- Yeah, it's the right one.
- Okay.
Nothing really seems
to be loose here.
- Oh. Sure seemed
loose to me.
- You know what?
I can't even tighten
these any more, really.
- Huh. I thought
it was loose.
- No.
- You know, it looks like
I made too much food here,
If you're, um, hungry.
- Oh. Yeah?
- Yeah. You want some?
- All right.
Yeah, wrap it up.
I'll eat it
in the truck.
- Okay.
I mean, you could eat it
here if you want.
- Oh.
Okay.
- You can sit.
- Sit? Sit here?
- Yeah. That's good.
- All right.
- You need me to help
with anything?
- No. I got it.
- Can I ask you
something?
- Yeah, sure.
- Were you making
all that food for someone,
And they didn't
show up?
- They showed up.
Here you go.
- So...The futon
was never loose?
- Look, you know, I've been out
with a lot of guys,
Like stockbrokers
and athletes
And rich, famous,
good-looking guys--
- So you're going
the other way now?
- No, no.
I'm not going any way.
You just seem
like a nice guy.
That's all.
You are planning on being
a journalist, right?
- Oh, yeah. Yeah.
- It's not as much fun
As knocking people over
with futons, but...
[both laugh]
- Actually, I'm gonna
be a sportswriter.
- Oh, really?
- Yeah. You like sports?
- Well, I do p.R.
For the rangers.
- Really?
- Yeah.
- So you know, like,
vanbiesbrouck and larouche?
- Yeah. All those guys.
- Wow.
- So, your family
seemed nice.
- Yeah. Yeah.
They seem nice.
I'm only living with them
until, you know...
- Yeah. Sure.
- Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah.
Wow. This is great.
This is--what is this?
- Oh, it's lemon chicken.
- Oh, man.
Wow.
- Yeah? You really
like it, huh?
- I could eat this
the rest of my life.
What?
- Nobody's ever really
liked my cooking before.
- Well, they're nuts.
Are you kidding?
This is great.
I'll probably--
can I have more?
- Yeah, sure.
- No, let me get it.
- No. I got it.
I can get it.
Hey, you want
something to drink?
- Yeah. Yeah. Well,
let me get that.
Okay. The glasses
are right there.
- Okay. Ice?
- Yeah, that'd be great.
[plates clatter]
- I like the round cubes
with the holes in them.
Those are my favorite
kind of cubes.
Oh!
Agh!
Are you okay?
- Yeah, I'm fine.
You keep
knocking me down.
- I know. I know.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
Ah, are you all right?
- Yeah.
You're a good kisser.
- All right.
You're in shock.
- Listen, I don't want you
to think I'm like this,
'cause I'm not.
- Me, neither.
- I mean, if this
goes anywhere,
It's gonna be
at least six months
Before you see me
naked again.
- It's okay.
I just want some more
of that chicken.
- Okay.
- [sighs]
Here's some
more chicken.
How is it?
- Great.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
Still great.
- And you're still
a good kisser.