Everybody Loves Raymond (1996–2005): Season 2, Episode 14 - Mia Famiglia - full transcript
Ray tries to find his oldest living relative.
- Grandpa, will you help me
with my homework?
- Nope.
- Frank.
- How else is she gonna learn?
Nobody handed me
any answers.
- Clearly.
Listen, she's doing
a family tree for school.
She has to interview
a relative.
- Your favorite relative?
- No.
The oldest.
- Well, I'm not the oldest
person in the family.
Don't you have,
like, some relatives
Living in Italy
or something?
- Yeah, there might be
somebody left.
Most of them came over
in a sardine boat,
But my father had a sister
who stayed behind in sicily.
Aunt sarina.
Zia sarina.
- Oh, she's still alive?
- Alive, dead,
who knows?
- It's nice
you're so close.
Hey, ally, maybe we could
write her a letter, huh?
- Yeah, okay.
- Ray, do you know
you might have relatives
Still living in Italy?
- Yeah?
Oh, great.
You might be able to use
the paper's research facilities
To find her.
Yeah, come on,
she's family.
- Well, yeah, but...
Why would we want to locate
more of these people?
- Mommy, I'm hot.
- Yeah.
Me too, honey.
Hey, frank,
I think that heat's
fixed enough, okay?
Thank you.
- I'll tell you
when it's fixed.
[pipes clanging]
Hold that pipe up, robert, okay?
Hold it up!
- It's hot, dad.
- What are you, a baby?
Hold it up!
- Ow.
- Hi, debra.
- Hi, marie.
- My!
It's hot in here.
Are you baking?
Oh, what am I saying?
- I asked your husband
if he knew a heating guy.
Turns out he's a heating guy.
- Hi.
Could use some ice.
- This is what happens
when frank fixes things.
You remember
the chimney, robbie?
- Yeah.
I told him I was too big.
- Well, we're all set.
- Frank,
it's a little hot in here.
- You're welcome.
- No, robert,
we're not having that.
Here.
Defrost the corn.
- What are you doing?
Would you feel this?
It's too hot.
- That's your damn
change of life.
- I went through that
ten years ago.
- Then how about a change
of personality?
- Hey.
- Oh, hi.
- Okay,
I did some research.
Took me three hours.
I located aunt sarina.
- Oh, great!
- Yeah. Yeah.
- Really, daddy?
- Uh-huh.
Uh-huh.
Her name is still barone.
You know,
I guess she never married,
And, um, she lives in, uh,
A place called bisacquino.
It's in sicily,
near palermo.
And she's got no phone,
no address,
But you can write to her
Care of
al ufficiado postale,
The village post office.
Why am I hot?
- All right,
stop complaining.
Next time,
pay a guy.
- I wanted to pay a guy.
I would overpay a guy.
- What did you let my father
fix the heat for?
- Don't you start
with me, okay?
Listen, help ally
write a letter to aunt sarina.
- It's too hot now.
- Come on, you know
a little italian, don't you?
- Oh, hardly any.
No, frank and I only spoke
italian when we were arguing
So that the boys
wouldn't understand.
- We're almost fluent.
- Mommy,
why didn't aunt sarina
Write back to me?
- Oh, honey, I know
it's been three weeks,
But we don't even know
if she's gotten the letter yet.
Listen, I think we're just gonna
have to go with uncle mel, okay?
I mean, he's really
very interesting.
- And just because
I was never married
Doesn't mean I'm gay.
God, it's as hot as hell
in here.
What are you trying to do,
Sweat the truth out of me?
- Mel, why don't you
just tell ally
About where you grew up?
- Oh. Yeah.
Brooklyn was
a pretty tough neighborhood.
I had at least one fight
every day.
- Oh, come on, mel.
A fight every day?
- That's right,
every day since I was four
Until I entered the service.
- Mel, that's,
like, 5,000 fights.
- Well, look at me.
Actually,
I joined the army
To get away
from the fighting.
[doorbell rings]
Although fighting
is what made me tough.
Do you fight yet?
- Hey, uh, 320 fowler?
- Mm-hmm.
- $45.75 plus $1.50 toll.
- What?
- Taxi from kennedy airport.
$45.75 plus toll.
And you know,
tip is good.
- Taxi for who?
- Ah...
La mia famiglia americana!
Ah!
- What?
What?
I'm sorry.
Who--who are you?
- La signora barone?
- Uh, yes.
- La signorina barone!
- I'm sorry, I don't...
Oh, this is the letter
that we...Wrote...
Oh, my gosh.
Are--are you
aunt sarina from Italy?
- Aunt sarina!
- Oh, che bella bambina!
Si, la zia sarina!
- What did she say?
- I don't know.
Just hug her.
- Uh, the money,
please, huh?
- Yeah, okay.
- Uh, excuse me.
Isn't anyone
going to introduce me to this...
Exotic creature?
[all chatting excitedly]
- Delizioso! Oh!
- Smells like Italy!
Holy crap!
That's good!
[all talking at once]
- Hello, hey.
Hey. Hello. Hey!
- Oh, hi, ray.
- Hey, ray, you're just in time
for pizza.
- Raimondo! Oh!
- [chuckling]
Who is this?
- It's zia sarina.
- Who?
- Your aunt from Italy.
- What?
- Yeah.
- Why?
- Because you
kind of invited her.
- When?
- The letter.
You said,
"if you're ever in america,
Come and visit us."
- What, so she
hops on a plane?
Well, who does that?
- A person
who cares about family.
Ti posso aiutare.
- Oh, si.
Grazie.
- I don't believe this.
- Per te. Per te.
- Ah, grazie.
Did you know
we had an ancestor
Who was a count?
She said I look
just like him.
That's right.
- Good, great, hey,
why don't we send for him too?
- Oh, ray,
come on, she's family.
- Plus she says the winters
are very cold in Italy,
And the heat's
not so good.
The heat's good here, huh?
Buono riscaldamento?
- Oh, si!
Molto buono.
[laughing]
- Wait, wait.
Where is she staying?
- Here.
- Here?
I--I put up a cot
in your office for her.
- In my office?
Dad, why can't she stay
at your house, huh?
She's your father's sister.
- We got only the one
extra bedroom.
There's already
a relative in it.
Unless you want to trade.
- Raimondo e molto stanco.
Perche no andate a casa vostra,
mangiarla la pizza?
E ci vendiamo domani, ah?
[all talking at once]
- Did you see that?
She said something,
and they just got up and left.
What did she say?
- I don't know.
How long is she staying?
- As long as she can do that.
- Hey.
Hey. Yep.
Uh...
Wait a minute.
Wait a--ew.
- Oh, scusi.
Non ti preocupare.
Non c'e problema.
- Well...
Dah.
Ah, you're wearing...
Okay.
Look, if you're going to sleep,
I'll go upstairs.
- No, no, no, no.
Tu lavora.
Lavora.
- Yeah, all right.
I'm just gonna be
a few minutes.
Then I'll get out of here.
- Cristo.
[mumbling in italian]
Ooh.
Sono tuoi,
Tutti questi premi?
- Yeah.
Just some...Awards.
- Oh, sono maravigliosi!
Oh!
- Oh, it's just a few awards.
That's all.
- No, ay,
sono molti, molti!
- Okay, molti, molti, molti.
- Oh, e, e questo?
Per che cosa l'ai vinto?
- That's sportswriter
of the year.
- Eh?
- It's scrittore sportivo
dell'anno.
- Scrittore sportivo
dell'anno!
- Yeah. Yes.
- Oh, raimondo!
- Just...New york only.
New york. Uh...
Solamente per new york.
- Nuova york!
Ma nuova york e grande!
Ah, nuova york...
Oh, mio nipote
E uno scrittore famoso.
- Ah, I'm not famous.
Come on.
Get out of here.
- [laughing]
Oh!
Questo e joe dimaggio?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah,
that's joe dimaggio.
- Oh.
Joe dimaggio, e italiano, eh?
- Yeah, yeah.
He's italian, yeah.
- E tu sei un grande amico
Di joe dimaggio, eh?
- No, no,
we're not friends.
I just--
I have the photograph.
That's all.
- Eh?
- I, uh...
Solamente uno fotografia.
- Oh.
Peggio per lui.
Ma senti sicura che
se joe dimaggio te conoscesse,
Che molto.
- [chuckles]
wow. Thank you.
Hey, I'm sure
he would like you too.
- Me?
- Yeah.
- [laughing] no.
- Yeah.
- Non ti disturbo piu.
Lavora te. Lavora.
- No, you're not
bothering me.
- It's okay.
I'm all right.
- No, no, no, no.
Lavora, eh?
- All right.
- Eh, lavora.
- Okay, I'll work
just a few minutes.
- Buona notte,
Scrittore famoso.
[laughs]
- Good night.
Famous writer.
Well...
[all talking at once]
[all speaking italian]
- Oh, raimondo.
Raimondo.
- Debra, debra.
- Oh, no, no, no.
I already had four.
- Huh?
- Four.
- What?
Wait, what did she say?
- What did she say?
Your grandma's involved
in the mafia?
I knew it.
- Zia sarina,
C'e la luna.
- Ah, c'e la luna.
[both singing in italian]
- Nah.
- [singing in italian]
[all singing in italian]
C'e la luna.
- C'e la luna.
- Trava.
- Mezz'o mare.
- Mezz'o mare.
- Mamma mia.
- Mamma mia.
[together]
me maritari.
[all singing in italian]
- When is the next train?
Quando arriva
il prossimo treno?
- Quando erriva
prossimo treno?
- Bene.
How much is the fare
to florence?
Quanto costa
un biglietto per firenze?
- Quanto costa
il biliete ti firenze?
- Bene.
Are there
any first-class compartments
Available on the train
to florence?
Ci sono rimasti
dei biglietti
Di prima classe
per firenze?
- Ci sono rimasti dei...
Blah-blah-blah firenze?
- Molto bene--
- Good.
Click!
- Hi, debra, honey.
- Hi, marie.
- Oh, isn't that
a cute outfit?
- Oh, thank you,
thank you.
- Here, you got to taste
this gnocchi.
- Oh!
Oh, it's so good!
Oh!
- It's zia sarina's recipe.
- Mmm.
It's nice to have her here,
isn't it?
- Oh, it's nice
to have family.
Uh, let me help you here.
- Oh, grazie.
- Oh, ho-ho!
That's very good!
Prego.
- Hi, girls!
[laughing]
It was right where you said
it would be, marie.
You really got things
organized well.
- Oh, thanks, honey.
Let me see.
Ooh!
- Mm.
Is that your father?
- Yeah, and his brothers
and baby sarina.
- Oh, isn't she cute?
- Oh, and aren't
those boys handsome?
It runs in the family.
- Hey.
All: Hey!
- Well, I finished
both driveways.
- Aw.
Grazie, robert.
- [italian accent] the village
is now safe to drive in.
- You're our hero.
- Hey.
All: Hey!
- Hey, how you doing, ray?
- How're you doing?
- Hey, how're you doing?
[both talking at once]
All: Hey!
- Hey, how was show and tell?
- Oh, the kids
love zia sarina.
I told them she was a personal
friend of pinocchio's.
[laughter]
- Mommy,
I can speak italian.
- Really?
- Jeremy mette
il dito nel naso.
All: Oh!
- That's great.
Mm, what does it mean?
- "jeremy picks his nose."
Sit down.
You know what else we found out?
Zia sarina
had twin brothers.
- Wow!
So twins run in the family.
- I guess so.
Dad, why didn't you
ever tell us
Your father
had twin brothers?
- He didn't.
- Luigi and enzo
were twins.
- Who are luigi and enzo?
- They're your uncles.
You don't even know
your own family.
- I know this is
my father, alberto,
And his brothers,
mario and--and ciccio
And federico,
And baby sarina.
No twins.
- E chi e questa gente?
- "who are these people?"
This is you.
This is your family.
Questa sei tu!
- No, no, no, no.
Questa non sono io, no.
- Frank, you got
the wrong picture!
- This is my family!
- Well, it's not her family.
- Oh, my god.
- Holy crap.
- Okay, so technically,
we're not related,
But she can still stay.
- Well, her real family
wants to see her.
- I finally had
a favorite relative.
There's not even
a runner-up.
[car whirs]
- Oh, that must be anna.
- Are you sure these barones
are her barones?
- Yeah, yeah.
Anna is her brother's
granddaughter.
- ♪[singing] c'e la luna
mezz'o mare--
- Ah, enough already.
- She's here.
- Hi, I'm anna barone.
Are you ray?
- Yes, hi, uh...
Come in.
This is, um--
- Anna!
- Zia sarina!
- Ahh...
- Oh, zia!
- This is your aunt sarina.
- Oh, thank you so much
for finding my zia sarina.
- She's a wonderful lady.
- That should've tipped us off
right there.
You know, barones,
we still could be something,
Distant cousins,
maybe, or something?
- Ah, there's a lot
of barones.
Some of them
aren't even really barones.
- What do you mean?
- Well, my grandfather
Used to talk
about this sardine packer,
And when he came
to america,
He just called himself barone.
Stole our name.
- That sounds like us.
- You come visit me
in Italy, eh?
- Yes, and you come back
And visit us here.
- Presto, presto.
Raimondo.
Aw.
- Okay. Bye-bye.
- Arrivederci.
Arrivederci.
- Ciao.
- Arrivederci.
- Bye-bye.
- So then who the hell
are we?
- You okay?
- Figures.
The best person
in our family,
And she's not
in our family.
- I miss her.
- Yeah.
Me too.
Ti amo.
- What?
- Ti amo.
It means--
- Yeah, I know
what it means.
- Yeah.
- You never say that.
- Well, it's easier in italian.
- Yeah.
Very romantic.
- Yeah?
- Say something else.
- Mi fanno male I piedi.
- Mm.
What does that mean?
- My feet hurt.
- Say something else,
But don't translate it.
- [speaking italian]
- Mm.
[romantic italian music]
with my homework?
- Nope.
- Frank.
- How else is she gonna learn?
Nobody handed me
any answers.
- Clearly.
Listen, she's doing
a family tree for school.
She has to interview
a relative.
- Your favorite relative?
- No.
The oldest.
- Well, I'm not the oldest
person in the family.
Don't you have,
like, some relatives
Living in Italy
or something?
- Yeah, there might be
somebody left.
Most of them came over
in a sardine boat,
But my father had a sister
who stayed behind in sicily.
Aunt sarina.
Zia sarina.
- Oh, she's still alive?
- Alive, dead,
who knows?
- It's nice
you're so close.
Hey, ally, maybe we could
write her a letter, huh?
- Yeah, okay.
- Ray, do you know
you might have relatives
Still living in Italy?
- Yeah?
Oh, great.
You might be able to use
the paper's research facilities
To find her.
Yeah, come on,
she's family.
- Well, yeah, but...
Why would we want to locate
more of these people?
- Mommy, I'm hot.
- Yeah.
Me too, honey.
Hey, frank,
I think that heat's
fixed enough, okay?
Thank you.
- I'll tell you
when it's fixed.
[pipes clanging]
Hold that pipe up, robert, okay?
Hold it up!
- It's hot, dad.
- What are you, a baby?
Hold it up!
- Ow.
- Hi, debra.
- Hi, marie.
- My!
It's hot in here.
Are you baking?
Oh, what am I saying?
- I asked your husband
if he knew a heating guy.
Turns out he's a heating guy.
- Hi.
Could use some ice.
- This is what happens
when frank fixes things.
You remember
the chimney, robbie?
- Yeah.
I told him I was too big.
- Well, we're all set.
- Frank,
it's a little hot in here.
- You're welcome.
- No, robert,
we're not having that.
Here.
Defrost the corn.
- What are you doing?
Would you feel this?
It's too hot.
- That's your damn
change of life.
- I went through that
ten years ago.
- Then how about a change
of personality?
- Hey.
- Oh, hi.
- Okay,
I did some research.
Took me three hours.
I located aunt sarina.
- Oh, great!
- Yeah. Yeah.
- Really, daddy?
- Uh-huh.
Uh-huh.
Her name is still barone.
You know,
I guess she never married,
And, um, she lives in, uh,
A place called bisacquino.
It's in sicily,
near palermo.
And she's got no phone,
no address,
But you can write to her
Care of
al ufficiado postale,
The village post office.
Why am I hot?
- All right,
stop complaining.
Next time,
pay a guy.
- I wanted to pay a guy.
I would overpay a guy.
- What did you let my father
fix the heat for?
- Don't you start
with me, okay?
Listen, help ally
write a letter to aunt sarina.
- It's too hot now.
- Come on, you know
a little italian, don't you?
- Oh, hardly any.
No, frank and I only spoke
italian when we were arguing
So that the boys
wouldn't understand.
- We're almost fluent.
- Mommy,
why didn't aunt sarina
Write back to me?
- Oh, honey, I know
it's been three weeks,
But we don't even know
if she's gotten the letter yet.
Listen, I think we're just gonna
have to go with uncle mel, okay?
I mean, he's really
very interesting.
- And just because
I was never married
Doesn't mean I'm gay.
God, it's as hot as hell
in here.
What are you trying to do,
Sweat the truth out of me?
- Mel, why don't you
just tell ally
About where you grew up?
- Oh. Yeah.
Brooklyn was
a pretty tough neighborhood.
I had at least one fight
every day.
- Oh, come on, mel.
A fight every day?
- That's right,
every day since I was four
Until I entered the service.
- Mel, that's,
like, 5,000 fights.
- Well, look at me.
Actually,
I joined the army
To get away
from the fighting.
[doorbell rings]
Although fighting
is what made me tough.
Do you fight yet?
- Hey, uh, 320 fowler?
- Mm-hmm.
- $45.75 plus $1.50 toll.
- What?
- Taxi from kennedy airport.
$45.75 plus toll.
And you know,
tip is good.
- Taxi for who?
- Ah...
La mia famiglia americana!
Ah!
- What?
What?
I'm sorry.
Who--who are you?
- La signora barone?
- Uh, yes.
- La signorina barone!
- I'm sorry, I don't...
Oh, this is the letter
that we...Wrote...
Oh, my gosh.
Are--are you
aunt sarina from Italy?
- Aunt sarina!
- Oh, che bella bambina!
Si, la zia sarina!
- What did she say?
- I don't know.
Just hug her.
- Uh, the money,
please, huh?
- Yeah, okay.
- Uh, excuse me.
Isn't anyone
going to introduce me to this...
Exotic creature?
[all chatting excitedly]
- Delizioso! Oh!
- Smells like Italy!
Holy crap!
That's good!
[all talking at once]
- Hello, hey.
Hey. Hello. Hey!
- Oh, hi, ray.
- Hey, ray, you're just in time
for pizza.
- Raimondo! Oh!
- [chuckling]
Who is this?
- It's zia sarina.
- Who?
- Your aunt from Italy.
- What?
- Yeah.
- Why?
- Because you
kind of invited her.
- When?
- The letter.
You said,
"if you're ever in america,
Come and visit us."
- What, so she
hops on a plane?
Well, who does that?
- A person
who cares about family.
Ti posso aiutare.
- Oh, si.
Grazie.
- I don't believe this.
- Per te. Per te.
- Ah, grazie.
Did you know
we had an ancestor
Who was a count?
She said I look
just like him.
That's right.
- Good, great, hey,
why don't we send for him too?
- Oh, ray,
come on, she's family.
- Plus she says the winters
are very cold in Italy,
And the heat's
not so good.
The heat's good here, huh?
Buono riscaldamento?
- Oh, si!
Molto buono.
[laughing]
- Wait, wait.
Where is she staying?
- Here.
- Here?
I--I put up a cot
in your office for her.
- In my office?
Dad, why can't she stay
at your house, huh?
She's your father's sister.
- We got only the one
extra bedroom.
There's already
a relative in it.
Unless you want to trade.
- Raimondo e molto stanco.
Perche no andate a casa vostra,
mangiarla la pizza?
E ci vendiamo domani, ah?
[all talking at once]
- Did you see that?
She said something,
and they just got up and left.
What did she say?
- I don't know.
How long is she staying?
- As long as she can do that.
- Hey.
Hey. Yep.
Uh...
Wait a minute.
Wait a--ew.
- Oh, scusi.
Non ti preocupare.
Non c'e problema.
- Well...
Dah.
Ah, you're wearing...
Okay.
Look, if you're going to sleep,
I'll go upstairs.
- No, no, no, no.
Tu lavora.
Lavora.
- Yeah, all right.
I'm just gonna be
a few minutes.
Then I'll get out of here.
- Cristo.
[mumbling in italian]
Ooh.
Sono tuoi,
Tutti questi premi?
- Yeah.
Just some...Awards.
- Oh, sono maravigliosi!
Oh!
- Oh, it's just a few awards.
That's all.
- No, ay,
sono molti, molti!
- Okay, molti, molti, molti.
- Oh, e, e questo?
Per che cosa l'ai vinto?
- That's sportswriter
of the year.
- Eh?
- It's scrittore sportivo
dell'anno.
- Scrittore sportivo
dell'anno!
- Yeah. Yes.
- Oh, raimondo!
- Just...New york only.
New york. Uh...
Solamente per new york.
- Nuova york!
Ma nuova york e grande!
Ah, nuova york...
Oh, mio nipote
E uno scrittore famoso.
- Ah, I'm not famous.
Come on.
Get out of here.
- [laughing]
Oh!
Questo e joe dimaggio?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah,
that's joe dimaggio.
- Oh.
Joe dimaggio, e italiano, eh?
- Yeah, yeah.
He's italian, yeah.
- E tu sei un grande amico
Di joe dimaggio, eh?
- No, no,
we're not friends.
I just--
I have the photograph.
That's all.
- Eh?
- I, uh...
Solamente uno fotografia.
- Oh.
Peggio per lui.
Ma senti sicura che
se joe dimaggio te conoscesse,
Che molto.
- [chuckles]
wow. Thank you.
Hey, I'm sure
he would like you too.
- Me?
- Yeah.
- [laughing] no.
- Yeah.
- Non ti disturbo piu.
Lavora te. Lavora.
- No, you're not
bothering me.
- It's okay.
I'm all right.
- No, no, no, no.
Lavora, eh?
- All right.
- Eh, lavora.
- Okay, I'll work
just a few minutes.
- Buona notte,
Scrittore famoso.
[laughs]
- Good night.
Famous writer.
Well...
[all talking at once]
[all speaking italian]
- Oh, raimondo.
Raimondo.
- Debra, debra.
- Oh, no, no, no.
I already had four.
- Huh?
- Four.
- What?
Wait, what did she say?
- What did she say?
Your grandma's involved
in the mafia?
I knew it.
- Zia sarina,
C'e la luna.
- Ah, c'e la luna.
[both singing in italian]
- Nah.
- [singing in italian]
[all singing in italian]
C'e la luna.
- C'e la luna.
- Trava.
- Mezz'o mare.
- Mezz'o mare.
- Mamma mia.
- Mamma mia.
[together]
me maritari.
[all singing in italian]
- When is the next train?
Quando arriva
il prossimo treno?
- Quando erriva
prossimo treno?
- Bene.
How much is the fare
to florence?
Quanto costa
un biglietto per firenze?
- Quanto costa
il biliete ti firenze?
- Bene.
Are there
any first-class compartments
Available on the train
to florence?
Ci sono rimasti
dei biglietti
Di prima classe
per firenze?
- Ci sono rimasti dei...
Blah-blah-blah firenze?
- Molto bene--
- Good.
Click!
- Hi, debra, honey.
- Hi, marie.
- Oh, isn't that
a cute outfit?
- Oh, thank you,
thank you.
- Here, you got to taste
this gnocchi.
- Oh!
Oh, it's so good!
Oh!
- It's zia sarina's recipe.
- Mmm.
It's nice to have her here,
isn't it?
- Oh, it's nice
to have family.
Uh, let me help you here.
- Oh, grazie.
- Oh, ho-ho!
That's very good!
Prego.
- Hi, girls!
[laughing]
It was right where you said
it would be, marie.
You really got things
organized well.
- Oh, thanks, honey.
Let me see.
Ooh!
- Mm.
Is that your father?
- Yeah, and his brothers
and baby sarina.
- Oh, isn't she cute?
- Oh, and aren't
those boys handsome?
It runs in the family.
- Hey.
All: Hey!
- Well, I finished
both driveways.
- Aw.
Grazie, robert.
- [italian accent] the village
is now safe to drive in.
- You're our hero.
- Hey.
All: Hey!
- Hey, how you doing, ray?
- How're you doing?
- Hey, how're you doing?
[both talking at once]
All: Hey!
- Hey, how was show and tell?
- Oh, the kids
love zia sarina.
I told them she was a personal
friend of pinocchio's.
[laughter]
- Mommy,
I can speak italian.
- Really?
- Jeremy mette
il dito nel naso.
All: Oh!
- That's great.
Mm, what does it mean?
- "jeremy picks his nose."
Sit down.
You know what else we found out?
Zia sarina
had twin brothers.
- Wow!
So twins run in the family.
- I guess so.
Dad, why didn't you
ever tell us
Your father
had twin brothers?
- He didn't.
- Luigi and enzo
were twins.
- Who are luigi and enzo?
- They're your uncles.
You don't even know
your own family.
- I know this is
my father, alberto,
And his brothers,
mario and--and ciccio
And federico,
And baby sarina.
No twins.
- E chi e questa gente?
- "who are these people?"
This is you.
This is your family.
Questa sei tu!
- No, no, no, no.
Questa non sono io, no.
- Frank, you got
the wrong picture!
- This is my family!
- Well, it's not her family.
- Oh, my god.
- Holy crap.
- Okay, so technically,
we're not related,
But she can still stay.
- Well, her real family
wants to see her.
- I finally had
a favorite relative.
There's not even
a runner-up.
[car whirs]
- Oh, that must be anna.
- Are you sure these barones
are her barones?
- Yeah, yeah.
Anna is her brother's
granddaughter.
- ♪[singing] c'e la luna
mezz'o mare--
- Ah, enough already.
- She's here.
- Hi, I'm anna barone.
Are you ray?
- Yes, hi, uh...
Come in.
This is, um--
- Anna!
- Zia sarina!
- Ahh...
- Oh, zia!
- This is your aunt sarina.
- Oh, thank you so much
for finding my zia sarina.
- She's a wonderful lady.
- That should've tipped us off
right there.
You know, barones,
we still could be something,
Distant cousins,
maybe, or something?
- Ah, there's a lot
of barones.
Some of them
aren't even really barones.
- What do you mean?
- Well, my grandfather
Used to talk
about this sardine packer,
And when he came
to america,
He just called himself barone.
Stole our name.
- That sounds like us.
- You come visit me
in Italy, eh?
- Yes, and you come back
And visit us here.
- Presto, presto.
Raimondo.
Aw.
- Okay. Bye-bye.
- Arrivederci.
Arrivederci.
- Ciao.
- Arrivederci.
- Bye-bye.
- So then who the hell
are we?
- You okay?
- Figures.
The best person
in our family,
And she's not
in our family.
- I miss her.
- Yeah.
Me too.
Ti amo.
- What?
- Ti amo.
It means--
- Yeah, I know
what it means.
- Yeah.
- You never say that.
- Well, it's easier in italian.
- Yeah.
Very romantic.
- Yeah?
- Say something else.
- Mi fanno male I piedi.
- Mm.
What does that mean?
- My feet hurt.
- Say something else,
But don't translate it.
- [speaking italian]
- Mm.
[romantic italian music]