Escape to the Chateau DIY (2018–2021): Season 3, Episode 6 - Episode #3.6 - full transcript

I'm Dick Strawbridge,
and with my wife Angel

and our two children,

Angel: Ha ha!
Dick: Don't crash.

Dick, voice-over:
we're nearly five years

into our French adventure,
restoring

this once abandoned chateau.

Dick: That one! Ha ha!

Dick, voice-over:
It's been a lot of hard work.

Dick: Uh! That's heavy.

Dick, voice-over: but a lot of
fun, too.

Dick: To families.
Everyone else: Families.



Dick: Families.

Dick, voice-over: And all over
France, there are other intrepid

British families doing exactly
the same.

Woman: I'm just randomly
drilling holes in the wall

at the moment.

Dick: Now Angel and I are once
again lending a hand

to other expat chateau owners.

Stephanie: That's working for
me. I love it!

Dick: We'll meet some new faces.
Man: * Ta-dee *

[Crash]
Jayne: Oh!

Dick: and some old friends.
[Jayne chuckling]

And we'll reveal more about
our own chateau life.

Boy: You're Monsieur Dick!
[Angel laughing]

Dick: There'll be plenty
of highs...



Woman: Yay!
Dick: and lows.

[Crack]

Rebecca: No, no. No.

Dick: But however hard
it gets...

Woman: Whoa.

Dick: they're all battling to
transform

these abandoned buildings...

Man: It's not the size of
the wine press that matters,

it's what you do with it.
Different man: Yeah.

Dick: into extraordinary homes
and businesses.

Isabelle: Oh, this is wonderful!

Dick: to live the dream as
custodians of

their very own castle.

Dick: Today...

[Crash]

Woman: Oops.

Dick: one chateau owner awaits
a special visitor...

Stephanie: I can't be the only
woman panicking about

the arrival of her mother
and the state of her house.

Belinda: How are you?
Lovely to see you.

Dick: a couple throw their
first-ever festive event...

-Hello.
-How are you?

Lee: Bonjour. Bonjour.
I should say bonjour.

Dick: only for the pressure
to take its toll.

Lee: Terry? Where's Terry?

The boiler's just blown.

Dick: a case of crossed wires
puts celebrations in jeopardy.

Jayne: I am a little bit
disappointed, actually,

because we haven't got any
electric lighting wired in yet.

It's going to be cocktails
by candlelight.

Dick: And at our place, you'll
never guess what Angel has

in store for me.

Angel: I'm after sizes that
are like this

all the way down to kind of
like slivers.

Dick: OK, you want lots of wood.

Dick: Across France, Brits like
us are working

throughout the year to run
their places

as homes and businesses.

Each season throws up its own
chateau-sized challenges.

Take the impressive 16th-century
Chateau de Lalande.

It has 18 bedrooms, a moat,
a chapel,

and is run for events
and as a B&B by Brit Stephanie.

Stephanie: The day I arrived
here, I just knew that was it

because it's so peaceful,
it's the middle of nowhere.

Dick: Located in central France,
Stephanie spent last summer

transforming the old granary
into an apartment

for her mum Isabelle...

Isabelle: Oh, Stephanie,
it's beautiful.

Dick, voice-over: and restored
the chateau's

19th-century bread oven

with the help of yours truly.

Dick: Yay!
Stephanie: Oh, yes!

Dick: That's more than
a pizza oven, you know.

You can have whole joints of
meats and everything in there.

Stephanie: Oh, well!
Maybe Christmas.

I wonder if I can do a turkey
in there.

[Dick laughs]

Dick: Now Stephanie's
preparing to end the year

in style, by throwing
a Christmas to remember

for friends, family,
and the volunteers that help her

run the chateau.

[Crash]

Woman: Oops.
Man: Oh, dear.

Dick: Easier said than done.

Stephanie: Christmas dinner
this year has got

all the potential to be
an epic nightmare

because it's a 5-course meal
for 17 people.

And it's complete chaos,
and I get overwhelmed

when I think about it.

Dick: One step at a time,

as the focus for now is getting
the decorations right

in the entrance hall.

Stephanie:
Because it has a fireplace

and my dining room doesn't,

and it's a little bit bigger
than the dining room,

we've decided to use it
for Christmas lunch.

The idea was to make a sort of
Narnia-like enchanted forest.

[Chuckles]

A Christmas elf has arrived.
Woman: Yay.

Stephanie: Amazing. Amazing!

Is that for this table?
Woman: Yes.

Stephanie: This is
the centerpiece for the table.

And there'll be white flowers
stuck amongst it.

Dick: The foliage and flowers
have all been collected

from the grounds, one of
the benefits of having

60 acres on your doorstep.

Stephanie: I'm putting so much
effort into this

because this is where we're
having Christmas lunch,

which is the main part of
Christmas, I think.

It's when we all sit down
together and eat together,

and so this should feel really
magical.

Dick: I'll second that.

But there's another reason
Stephanie wants it perfect.

Mum Isabelle is arriving
tomorrow

to spend Christmas with her.

Stephanie: I think she's going
to be surprised because

I haven't told her about
the enchanted forest idea.

So she has no idea we're doing
anything like this.

It's a big surprise,
so fingers crossed,

she'll really like it.

Dick: The following morning,
Stephanie's determined

to ensure everything's just
right before her mum arrives.

Stephanie: I can't be the only
woman panicking about

the arrival of her mother
and the state of her house.

Dick: Too late now!

Here she is, along with close
family friend Gerry.

Stephanie: Gerald, my angel.

Isabelle: You're looking lovely.

Dick: Let's hope Stephanie's
decorations are a hit.

Isabelle: Sweetheart...

Stephanie: So what do you think?
Isabelle: It's beautiful.

It's so restful.

Stephanie: We've basically
brought Narnia

into the entrance hall.
Isabelle: It's wonderful.

Stephanie: You like it?
Isabelle: Very much so, yes.

Dick: It's a thumbs-up
all around,

but this was the easy bit.

Now it's time to get cracking
on the food.

This is the charming
15th-century Chateau Mareuil,

which south London couple
Belinda and Lee bought

for £378,000 four years ago.

Lee: If you'd asked me did I
ever think I would end up

owning a chateau,
I would say no.

Belinda: Lee used to talk about
owning a chateau quite a lot,

and I used to sort of
half-ignore it,

because I just thought it was
his fantasy, basically,

but it's actually come true...
Lee: Here we are.

Belinda: which is completely
crazy.

Dick: Situated 40 miles from
Limoges,

last summer they launched their
medieval chateau as a business

by hosting their first paying
guests...

Belinda: Welcome to
Chateau Mareuil.

Dick: and putting on their
first paid event.

[Applause]

A few months on, Belinda and Lee
are already looking ahead

to their next summer season.

Lee: At the moment, my mind
sets thinking of all the things

that I still need to do because
it's winter

and I'm trying to get the place
prepared so that

when the spring and the summer
season comes about,

I want all of that work to
be done

so that it's in its perfect
condition for guests.

Dick: Before they get down to
that, Belinda and Lee are

getting into the festive spirit
by hosting a Christmas event

in their salon for a local
cat charity.

Belinda: And we're going
to have live music--

lovely live
classical music--

we're going to have a singalong
that everyone can join in,

delicious hot food, mulled wine,
minced pies, and a raffle.

That's my plan.

Dick: Ahead of welcoming
30 guests tomorrow,

they have bags of stuff to do.

Lee: Here's what we're looking
for, some berries.

Dick: Lee's first job is to
create a garland to decorate

the salon fireplace.
Lee: Look at that one.

Don't know if I can reach.
I hate being short.

'Cause you can't--

Look at that.

That's a nice one.

Dick: Well, Lee has his hands
full, and he's not the only one.

Belinda: I am making some
canapes for tomorrow's event.

It's really important that
tomorrow goes well for us

without a hitch because,
you know,

it's all about reputation.

And we really want to get
a reputation of having

a high standard here.

Dick: No pressure there, Lee.

Lee: I haven't got
much time left.

I think it's nicer than going
out and buying stuff

to make it yourself because
there is a sort of

certain satisfaction that you
can get from doing it.

Dick: He's knocked up a frame
from an old plank and some mesh.

Lee: Oh, yeah. That's all right.

There she blows.

Dick: OK. Looks good to me,

but it's not
my opinion he's worried about.

Lee: I wonder what Belinda's
gonna think when she sees this.

She'll probably laugh, I think.

Dick: Only one way to find out.

-Belinda?
-Yes, Lee?

Lee: Jump on the end
of that, will you?

Belinda: Looking good.
Lee: Right.

When I say "lift," lift it and
then walk towards the window.

Lift.

That's it.

Now if you could pass it
up to me.

Belinda: See, even short
people can do these things.

[Chuckling]

That looks really good.

I think that looks smashing.

My only observation, if you
like, is there's a lot--

this is a bit sparse here, if
you could--

Lee: That is meant to be.

Belinda: Well, yeah, but it's
not the same as that side.

Lee: No, well, it's
a natural thing, isn't it?

Belinda: OK.

Lee: Because it's just nature
doing it, what nature does.

-Yeah.
-Yeah.

I'm quite pleased with that.

I'll do another one
now for the kitchen. Heh!

But first, I've got to find
the radiator and bleed key

and try and get in
and bleed those radiators

because otherwise there's
no point in having a little fire

if the house
isn't getting warm.

So I'm going to go and see
if I can find the key.

Dick: Lee heads off to find out
what the trouble is.

A quick inspection of
the radiators reveal they're

all stone cold.

Lee: We've hit a bit of
a snag with the heating.

The way it works is
a wood burning stove

not only heats the room,
but it is linked

into the central heating system.

So what's happened is
there's a hairline fracture

in the main pipe, which is
causing it--water--to drip out

like a leaky sieve
at the back,

but it doesn't mean we can't
have the stove on.

Belinda: Lee, we've got guests
arriving. It's freezing.

Lee: Well, we must keep these
doors shut because I've gone

in and out, and these
doors are open.

Belinda: OK, We'll keep
the doors shut, then.

Lee: Yeah.

Dick: If they can't get
the heating on, it'll take

more than mulled wine to keep
their guests happy tomorrow.

This is the elegant
19th-century Chateau Thuries.

Boasting 23 rooms and sitting
in four acres of woodland,

it's home to British
couple Jayne and Steve.

Jayne: When we first walked in
the driveway, it was

just wonderful, wasn't it?
Steve: I think we both knew.

Jayne: I think we both instantly
knew, you know, because

it's just such
a beautiful house.

Dick: They bought a chateau near
Toulouse for £400,000 last year

after Steve quit his wildlife
charity job and Jayne,

her position
at a chartered surveyors.

They've spent their time since
transforming

the run-down first floor
into four luxury B&B suites.

Jayne: I can't wait to show you.

Rosie: Wow. Amazing, Mum.

Ella: It looks so good.

Dick: This winter, they're
tackling the ground floor

so they can be ready to welcome
guests in the spring.

But that's not
the only thing on their plate.

Daughters Rosie and Ella will
soon arrive

for the family's first Christmas
at the chateau.

Jayne: We've got all
the family coming.

We've got a cocktail party.

We're going to have to work
our socks off, really,

until then
to get it absolutely perfect.

I think the main thing is,
isn't it, that we get

the designing room
and the hallway done.

-As much as we can.
-As much as we can.

Jayne: And whatever is
left to be done,

we can just cover it
with baubles.

Dick: I think you're going to be
surprised how many baubles

a chateau needs.

The cocktail party
is in three weeks.

So Jayne and Steve have
roped in chateau helper Jean

to lend a hand.

Jayne: I think it's
probably a good idea

to take these shelves
out because they're very heavy.

Dick: They start in
the dining room.

Jayne: It's very exciting.

I never thought we'd get
to this point where we're going

to move these two big beasts
away from the wall so that

then I can get on with
stripping the wallpaper

behind it, and we can start to
decorate now, which is

so exciting, I can't tell you.

So it's all systems go.

Steve: You go? Oh, I see, yeah.

[Jayne gasps]

Jayne: Right.
Steve: See what I mean?

Jayne: Tell you what, if I
hold--if I hold it steady.

Steve: Ready?
Jean: Steve, that's perfect.

Steve: It's perfect.
Jayne: Yeah. Yeah.

[Jean chuckles]

Jayne: OK.
Jean: Good?

Jayne: Yup. This is fine?

It's not
moving at all, actually.

That's fine.

And I think if we can
just quickly move that here--

Steve: And put it here.

Jayne: back to back, they'll
stabilize each other.

Steve: Oh, you're doing
the whole thing.

Jean: Good.
Steve: Is that good?

Jean: Yeah. I think--
I think so, yes.

Steve: OK.
Jayne: Fabulous.

So now, I can crack on
with this room.

Dick: Armed with her trusty
wallpaper stripper,

Jayne gets to work.

Jayne: Oh, that's satisfying.
Look at that.

Oh, that's a nice bit.

Sometimes what happens is
you find a really easy bit

and then the next bit you do
is really, really difficult.

You know, we still have
an awful lot to do.

Dick: You said it, Jayne.

And that's before you can even
think about the baubles.

At our place in
the Pays de la Loire,

we absolutely adore
the festive season.

Girl: I did it!
Dick: H-hey!

All right. Cheers to Christmas.

Dick, voice-over: Since we moved
in nearly five years ago,

we've held some cracking
knees-ups here.

But each year,
Angel likes to do

something
a little bit different.

Angel: On your place settings,
the book is your

Christmas cracker.

[Excited chatter]

[Blows whistle]

Dick: But...

Dick, voice-over:
This Christmas is no exception.

Dick: We may have to chop down
some trees because I

don't think I've got
any nice logs.

Dick, voice-over: Angel's latest
idea is to use logs to decorate

the dining table.

Luckily, we have 12 acres of
grounds, and I've been roped in

to help.

Angel: They could work, some
of these bigger ones...

OK. We'll come back to these
if necessary, all right?

Angel: OK.

Dick: Look at these logs.

These are more exciting
because these come

from the cherry tree
that stood there.

Remember the old cherry tree?

Angel: Yeah. I'm not
after that sort of size.

I'm after sizes that are
like this

all the way down to kind of like
slivers, a variety of things.

Dick: OK. So I'm going to see
about chopping up

some discs of this,
different sized discs.

OK. How many are we
talking about in total?

Angel: I don't know. 15?

Dick: OK. You want lots of wood.

Angel:
I like our business meetings.

Dick: I've been in charge
of some

major engineering projects
in my time,

but with Angel as foreman,
it's a different ball game.

[Honking]

I think that's she was
talking about, things like that.

That's one.

Two.

I'm imagining little groups of
these sitting together.

That one could probably do
with being squared away.

So let's square that one off
to make that one useful.

Right. Safety gear on.

Time to make these logs fit
for the Christmas table.

Turning logs into toadstools
and bits and pieces,

it's not me.
That's not me at all.

Never mind the log sculptures.
I've got to get on.

The boss
is waiting for her logs.

170 miles southeast at
Chateau de Lalande,

Stephanie's Christmas plans
are in full swing.

Stephanie: The chairs?

Maybe the chairs could just go
out of this room altogether.

Dick: She's putting on
a 5-course dinner for her family

and chateau volunteers
tomorrow.

And as if that wasn't enough...

Steve: We've decided to
experiment by doing

the roast turkey
in the bread oven.

Also, we're hoping to cook
a roast goose

in the ancient range cooker
in the kitchen,

which hasn't been used
for, well, 13 years.

I'm feeling very excited
about it, because the thing is

it's Christmas.

If it goes wrong, it doesn't
matter as long as

we just keep partying.

Dick: I'm not so sure
about that.

But cooking for 17 guests
is going to be a tall order

unless Stephanie can get
that range fired up.

Stephanie: So let me show you
what state we've got it here.

Michael: How exciting.

Stephanie: Exciting but quite
scary, considering it's--

Michael: It is
a little bit scary, yeah.

Stephanie: it's Christmas Eve.
Michael: It's Christmas Eve.

Dick: So she's brought in
mate Michael to see if he can

get it going.

Michael: Yeah. I think we can
get it running.

Stephanie: And you really think
you can do the goose in this?

Michael: I think we can do
the goose in it.

I think we can do quite
loads of stuff in here like--

Stephanie:
OK. The "we" is worrying me.

-We?
-You.

Michael: OK. Me.

Stephanie: You are doing
the goose in this.

Michael: The pressure is on me.

Right. I'll get on
it with it, then.

-Yup.
-You go and do pretty things.

Stephanie:
I'm still doing the nameplates.

[Michael chuckling]

Isabelle: So now is a big
job isn't it, Gerry?

Gerry: Well, we've got
a challenge on today.

Dick: Mum Isabelle and family
friend Gerry have been handed

the job of cooking the turkey.

First, they have to light
a fire in the bread oven.

Gerry: Can we get some of that
candle in there that's there?

Isabelle: I must say, Gerry,
this is not very same wood,

is it?

Gerry: [indistinct].
Isabelle: I don't think...

it looks very
promising so far.

That's far too big.

Gerry: Trust me. I've done this
before.

Rome wasn't built in a day.

Isabelle:
Now, that's a brilliant idea.

We could use a plate
perhaps to fan--

Gerry: Use a plate for what?
Isabelle: to fan the fire.

Gerry: No, no, don't.
No. My fire is going fine.

Isabelle: You do it.
Gerry: Do what?

[Isabelle imitates fan blowing]

Gerry: No, look. It's going
fine. If I do that--

Isabelle: Yes. Yes.

You see? Better still.

Gerry: Well, it's working.

Dick: Nice work.

That needs to be stoked up,
and it will be ready

for the turkey tomorrow.

Isabelle: Thank God for plates.
Gerry: Ha ha!

Dick: Back in the kitchen,
things are also looking up.

Michael is stuffing fireproof
insulation into the range

to stop any smoke escaping.

I mean if this--if this works,
you know, if this works,

there's no reason why we can't
cook a lot of stuff in it,

like, you know, we got
roast potatoes,

we got vegetables
that we can cook

on the hot plate at the top.

Gerry: We are probably
doing--the real oven.

Stephanie: Are you telling me
that this is now a war

between the bread oven--
Isabelle: Yes. Absolutely.

Stephanie: and the range cooker?
Michael: Oh, definitely. Yeah.

Gerry: The bread oven is
going to win hands down.

Michael: I know which one is
going to be best.

Gerry: The bread oven!

Stephanie: I'm joining in
with the electric oven.

[Laughter]

Isabelle: Oh, ye
of little faith.

Dick: May the best team win.

Back at Chateau Mareuil,
it's the morning of

Belinda and Lee's festive
charity event.

Lee: I'm just looking
at the time now.

It's quarter past 10:00, and
I'm thinking of what's needs

to be done.

Dick: With only two hours to go
until 30 paying guests arrive,

they're still tackling
their heating issues.

Lee: We are very lucky to
have Terry, who could make it

on such short notice, really,
because I couldn't do what

he's doing.

For simplicity's sake,
what Terry is now going to do

is refits the joints,
top and bottom.

But in order to do that,
he's got to drain

the whole system down, so
it's a little bit under pressure

at the moment.

Dick: In the kitchen, Belinda
has also called in backup.

-How are you?
-Lovely to see you.

So glad you're here.

Dick: Her son Lawrence, his
wife Heidi, and a battalion

of their friends have arrived
from the UK to lend a hand.

Belinda: If I just talk you
through what's happening today,

we're going to be giving
them some canapes.

Main course is pork and cider,
crushed jacket potatoes.

So that's it, really.

Lee: 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25,
26. We're four short. Oh, God.

Why do I do this? Why?

Dick: With less than an hour
to go, it's the final push

to be ready.

Lawrence:
What am I chopping now?

Belinda:
Do you know, it's amazing.

It's really good
that everyone's helping out

so much, honestly.

I've organized everything.

So I've got to be on call,
but it is great to have

so many pairs of hands.
It's brilliant.

Dick: You're on call now.

Your first guests
are arriving.

But suddenly, disaster!
[Water spraying]

Lee: Terry? Where's Terry?

The boiler's just blown.

Dick: With the guests already
taking their seats, if Lee

can't stop the leak,
this event could be a washout.

At Chateau Thuries, it's two
days before Jayne and Steve's

Christmas cocktail party.

Jayne:
You've missed a bit, Steve.

Steve: Oh, I can see it. Yeah.
Jayne: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Dick: They've managed to strip,
repaper,

and almost decorate
the dining room.

But the bad news is, their
electrician hasn't had time

to finish the wiring.

Jayne: So it's going to be
cocktails by candlelight,

because we haven't got
any electric lighting

wired in yet.

I am a little bit
disappointed, actually.

Dick: Cheer up, Jayne.

I'm sure all this hard work
will pay off in the end.

The following morning,
there's some festive cheer

for Jayne and Steve.

Two extra elves
have arrived to help...

Jayne: Ah!

Dick: daughter Rosie
and her boyfriend Tom.

Rosie: So much has been done
since we were last here.

Well, especially since
you were last here anyway.

Tom: Yeah. I was here
for four, five months ago.

And it was so dark before.

Rosie: I think the last two
weeks have been really,

really stressful for them.

I'm hoping that now we're
here, they'll be able to relax

for the first time in months.

Dick: First job, the
all-important Christmas tree.

Jayne: It needs to sort of
open up a bit, doesn't it?

Rosie: I think it's great.

Jayne: Yeah, I'm thinking about
more bushiness at the bottom.

Rosie: I think it's
really nice, Mum.

Dick: Now for the lights.

But there is
no power in the dining room.

Rosie: I'm gonna use this one.

Dick: It means running an
extension lead from the kitchen.

Is this the longest
French extension cable, Mum?

Dick: Rosie, use
your Christmas elf magic.

Tom: What's wrong with that one?

Rosie: It needs to stretch
to over there.

Dick: You can do it. Hooray!

Tom: We're on.
Rosie: Yay.

Tom: Oh, brilliant.
Oh, that looks great.

Jayne: So I got Rosie
and Tom here today.

And, yeah, it's really
exciting.

They're home for Christmas!

What I want to do
is just get organized,

get the furniture back,
get it all cleaned up,

get the Christmas decs up,
and have it looking fantastic.

And then we'll
have guests arriving at 7:00.

It's looking good.

Dick: With the tree done

and their party guests
arriving soon,

it's all hands
on decking the halls...

Steve: That's lovely.

Dick: and just in time for
the next arrivals...

Ella: Mama.

Steve: Hi, Simon. How are you
doing, mate?

Dick: Jayne's other daughter
Ella and her partner Simon.

Jayne: So welcome home, sweetie.
Ella: Yay! Oh, wow.

Oh, it's so Christmassy! Aw.

Aw. The tree. Everything.

Oh, it's so nice.

[Cork pops, cheering]

Rosie: Merry Christmas.

Steve: Fun starts here.
Jayne and Ella: Aw.

Steve: Oh, good to see
you, mate.

Simon: Yeah, you, too.

Ella:
Are you excited for tonight?

-Yeah.
-You all ready?

Jayne: I am. I think we're
getting there, actually.

Yeah, we've done most things.

All together.

-Merry Christmas.
-Merry Christmas.

Steve: Group hug, group hug.
[Laughter]

Dick: Better get
your glad rags on.

Your guests will be
arriving shortly.

Back at our place, I've been
dispatched to the grounds

to sort wood for
Angel's table decorations.

Dick, laughing: A little
bit of wood!

I'm not the only
one who's been put to work.

Inside, Mrs. Strawbridge
has the children

on biscuit-making duty.

Angel: Come and choose
your rolling pin.

Dick: That design looks
rather familiar.

Boy: Dick. Dickie boy.
Angel: Ha ha!

Boy: Ahoy, my mateys.
Angel: Who knows what to do?

Boy: To roll it!
Angel: OK. Put it down there.

Girl: Press it down.

Angel: Yeah. We
got to roll it first. Yeah?

That's it.

There are definitely
different ways of doing it.

Whoo! OK, gentle. Gentle.

That's it. Choose one you want.

OK.

Right.

Choose your moustache, you.

Boy: OK. I'm
going to be beat you again.

Angel: Come on.

Children, I do not know if
this mustache goes that way

or that way.

Boy: It goes the first way.

Yes! You're Monsieur Dick.
Angel: Ha ha!

Dick: Nope, I'm Monsieur Dick.

And outside,
I'm finally finished.

Spoiling her.

She wants discs of wood,
some this size, some that size.

It's a matter of, Get
a chainsaw, chop some bits

of wood up, and then let
her do some thinking.

And it always seems
to work out in the end.

And I'm not going to argue.
I just say, "Yes, dear."

So I've done with my bit.

Only thing is, it's
actually quite heavy. Ha ha!

Agh.

A little later in the
dining room, Angel can reveal

her Christmas table decorations.

Angel:
These are exciting logs. Ha ha!

And this is really nothing
more than a bit of

Christmas on the table.

I didn't
want to leave it blank.

I am the bane of Dick's life--
Ha ha!--I'm quite sure.

I want this place
to be magical.

Dick: The table looks
fabulously festive.

Glad to see
the logs passed muster.

At Chateau Mareuil, Belinda
and Lee's festive preparations

aren't going
quite as smoothly.

Lee: Boiler's just blown.

Terry, I think
we sprung a leak.

Dick: Their musical event
is about to start,

but the guests have arrived
in the midst

of a plumbing emergency.

Lee: Shall I turn the valve off?
Terry: No, no.

Lee: It's there,
I think, isn't it?

Dick: So it's plumber friend
Terry to the rescue again.

Lee: I'll just bung this towel
down here, then. So, yeah?

Terry: Yeah. You can soak her
up, then, Lee.

Lee:
Boy, that was a close one.

Thing, as the guests were
arriving, the boiler sprouted

water, and it was
pouring out in the back.

But we've managed to get
it fixed, actually, as they're

coming through the door.

Crisis averted,
thanks to Terry, yeah.

-Hi, darling.
-How are you?

Dick: With the heating now on,
Lee and Belinda can give their

30 guests a warm welcome.

Lee: Bonjour.

Bonjour. Bonjour. It's
lovely to see you again.

Oh, I'm shaking,
I'm so nervous.

It's because it's all been
a last-minute rush. Look at me.

I'm like--I was like this
the last time we had

an event here.

I really don't
know why I do it.

Dick: Luckily, the evening's
compère has it all in hand.

Belinda:
Welcome to Chateau Mareuil.

We're really happy to see
all of you here this afternoon.

[Speaking halting French]

will enjoy. Ha ha!
[Man speaks French]

Merci. Le belle musique.

[Applause]

[Woman singing
in foreign language]

Dick:
As the music gets underway,

next door in the kitchen,

the final food prep has
to continue in total silence.

And 30 hungry guests means
they're not home and dry yet.

Belinda: I think we need to...

Dick: I'd beat a hasty retreat
if I were you, Lee.

[Woman continues singing
in foreign language]

Dick: And anyway,
the music's finished.

So you're needed in the salon.

Belinda: Anyone who would
like some lunch?

I hope you all do want lunch.
It's a lovely lunch.

[Indistinct chatter]

Oh, I find it very,
very enjoyable. Really nice.

Very, very pleasant.
Very, very nice.

The food was good,
the music was super.

Dick: It came close to going
under at one point,

but Belinda and Lee's
Christmas does seem to have

hit the right notes.

Not only that, they've raised
over £265 for the cat charity

they're supporting.

Belinda: I think today went
incredibly well, don't you?

I'm really pleased with it.

I think it went better
than we hoped for.

Lee: Yeah. I definitely agree
with you on that

because there was loads of them
there

as I was saying good-bye,
saying, "When are you

going to do the next one?"

Belinda:
I know. Are we doing this again?

Lee: Well, yeah, I suppose so.
Belinda: I think we must.

Dick: Good work, you two.

Now you can turn your
attention to getting

this place ready
for your next summer season.

A hundred miles away...

Michael: Right.

Different man: Let's get
the last bits in, then.

Dick: Stephanie's Christmas
dinner extravaganza is

in less than 24 hours.

Stephanie: You can't just
stand back and admire that.

I want to see that working.

I want to see steam
coming out of that kettle.

Dick: The battle to get her two
old ovens up and running is

heating up.

Gerry and the bread oven seem
to have their noses in front.

Gerry: Yeah, the temperature
has started to go up

a little bit.

-Oh, is it?
-Yeah, one degree.

Isabelle: Gerry, it should show
at least a little--

a little something.

Gerry: This is on top of
the range thermometer.

Isabelle: I think it is rubbish.

Gerry: No, this on top
of the range.

Dick: Inside, Michael's been
topping up the kitchen range

with coal for the past hour

and thinks he's finally
made a breakthrough.

Michael: There is a fire.

So I'm just going to put that
back because it's going

to fill the room with
smoke otherwise.

And it's actually
starting to warm up.

Can you--can you
feel the warmth?

Stephanie: It's amazing.

It's like feeling life
come back into the house.

Dick: Great going!

And with both ovens fired up,
Stephanie can afford

to take a breather.

Stephanie: Oh, yes.
What is this?

Man: It's the Last Word.
It's very dangerous.

-Cheers.
-Cheers.

Dick: But not for long,

as tonight, she's hosting
a Christmas Eve carol concert

in the chapel
for her chateau volunteers

and visiting family.

And while Stephanie gets
dressed, in the kitchen,

preparations for
the evening are in full swing.

Man: Quite good.

Dick: Stephanie is ready,

and, before the singing starts,
wants to make sure everything

in the chapel is good to go.

Stephanie: Ohh, it's magical.

I love it!

I feel as though
I've walked into a fairytale.

It's nice because a lot of
the people that

we're celebrating with tonight,
they help out

and they're really part of
chateau life,

and we all

have to take time to
stop working and realize

just how special life is here
and how lucky we are to be here.

So, it's good to make
it magical for them.

Dick: The wait is over,
and Stephanie's Christmas can

at last begin.

-Merry Christmas.
-Merry Christmas.

-Merry Christmas.
-Merry Christmas. Mwah.

Stephanie: Welcome to Lalande's
12 Days of Christmas

and our first
carol concert in the chapel.

OK. "Joy to the World."

All: * Joy to the world,
the Lord is come *

* Let Earth receive
her King... *

Stephanie, voice-over:
I think any anxiety that I had

about preparing everything,
making the house beautiful,

and just having time to get
things done

has completely evaporated.

And now I can just enjoy
Christmas

with the slight reservation

of a completely burnt turkey
that we're quite lucky

to be eating
for Christmas lunch.

Dick: At Chateau Thuries,

Jayne and Steve's
cocktail party guests

are about to arrive.

The dining room has been
transformed

into a Christmas cocktail bar by
their daughters Ella and Rosie.

And that's not all that's in
store for Jayne and Steve.

Rosie: We have got a special
cake that they don't know about.

And then we have got this,
an amazing icing...

Ella: Wow.
Rosie: to go on the top.

Ella: Whoa. Ha ha.

Rosie: So they're going
to come in and, hopefully,

be really happy with what
we've done, be a nice surprise.

Rosie: OK. We're coming in.

Jayne: Oh, wow! Look at that.
Ha ha.

Steve: Wow!
It's like a night club in here.

Jayne: "Like a night club"!
It's not like a night club.

It's like a very classy bar.

Steve: Looks like
a cocktail bar.

Jayne: Classy cocktail bar.
Steve: Oh, well done, guys.

Jayne: It looks amazing.
Steve: It does.

Jayne: You worked so hard!

Dick: And the surprises for
Jayne and Steve don't end there.

Jayne: Oh, my God.
Steve: Oh, my God.

Jayne: Look at that.
That is beautiful.

Steve: That is really great.

Jayne: I am--ooh. I just don't
know what to say.

It looks amazing.

I know everything is not
finished, but that's going to

sort of contribute to the magic
of the evening in a way.

Ella: Ready for some cocktails?

Dick: And as the guests--friends
they've made since they moved

to France--begin to arrive,
the party can get started.

Ella: I think tonight
has been great.

I mean, everyone is having
such a good time,

and it's just so nice...
Rosie: It's really magical.

Ella: and all being here
together and--

Rosie: As cheesy as it is,
it's really magical--

having customers
in the chateau.

Steve: Merry Christmas.

[Cheering]

Dick: Happy Christmas, you two!

Enjoy yourselves
before the work ramps up again.

Jayne: In the new year,
we've just got to crack on

with the ground floor.

We've got to get the salon and
the dining room finished first,

and then we should start
getting some bookings soon,

I would hope.

Steve: Well, it would
be nice to get a booking in

because once we've got a booking
in, we've got that goal.

-Chin-chin, darling.
-Cheers, darling.

-Here's to a lovely Christmas.
-Yeah.

Dick: It's Christmas morning
at Stephanie's.

The goose and turkey are
already in,

and the festivities are just
getting started.

[Indistinct chatter]

Steve: Oh, what a Christmas! Got
me a new inflatable flamingo.

[Laughter]

Dick: There's nothing like
friends and family all together

at Christmas.

Stephanie:
Merry Christmas, everyone.

-Merry Christmas.
-Merry Christmas.

Dick: But with a five-course
meal to prepare, Stephanie needs

to get busy in the kitchen.

All: Cheers.

Stephanie: We are hoping
to eat in a new-new time plan,

1 1/2 hours.

It was supposed to be 3:00.
I think it's going to be 3:30.

Question is, how's your goose?

Michael: Let's check
the temperature of it.

Stephanie:
I'm quite nervous about this.

Michael: There you go.

Stephanie:
So what's it supposed to be?

Michael: 73.9. It's going up.

Stephanie:
Oh, you're basically there.

Michael: It's basically cooked.
Stephanie: I can't believe it.

And in this oven!

Michael: With
an hour and a half to spare.

Stephanie:
And it doesn't smell of smoke.

Michael: No, there's no smoke
in there now.

Stephanie: It smells of
delicious spices. Oh, yes.

Michael: I'm just
as shocked as you are.

Dick: Well, that's good news.
But what about the other bird?

Stephanie: Wow! How is it this
sunny on Christmas Day?

Dick: Four hours since the
turkey went into the bread oven,

it's the moment of truth.

Isabelle: Abracadabra!

* Ta-da *

Stephanie: Oh, no! Gerry.

Gerry: I'll bring it out
to the front.

Stephanie: Oh, that's beautiful.

I'm so impressed with this.
I'm completely flabbergasted.

I thought we were going
to have this

black shriveled turkey or a raw
turkey, but it's beautiful.

It smells delicious.
It's golden brown.

I can't believe it came
out of the bread oven.

Dick: Excellent work
all round, chaps.

Now it's just the small matter
of getting everything else

ready on time.

Stephanie: Tell me if
the scallops come to a simmer.

If they come to a simmer,
I need to know about it.

So it's all go,
all hands on deck.

Dick: Despite Stephanie's best
efforts, she's running

an hour behind schedule.

Stephanie: Sorry. I took
time out. How is it going?

Dick: It's not gone unnoticed
by mum Isabelle.

Isabelle: Time management.
Stephanie: Oh, yes.

Isabelle: I would like you
to take a management course.

Stephanie: Oh, would you?
Would you, now?

Dick: Finally,
after a monumental effort,

the food is ready to be served.

Stephanie: This is it.

The apron's coming off,
and the party is starting.

Gerry: I'd better pinch myself.
It's true.

We're eating Christmas dinner.
[Stephanie laughing]

[Tapping on glass]

Stephanie:
Merry Christmas, everyone.

Michael: Merry, Merry Christmas.
All: Merry Christmas.

Dick: Stephanie's hard work has
paid off with the food going

down a treat.

And both the goose
and turkey look spectacular.

Stephanie: I like all of the
meats, but considering the fact

that turkey is not
usually a good meat

and is really delicious tonight,

I think that...
[Gerry laughing]

team bread oven may have won.
[Michael clears throat loudly]

Stephanie: No,
now I'm rethinking.

Man: However.
Michael: However.

Stephanie: It's been brought to
my attention that, in fact,

the goose won
in the range cooker.

-No.
-No.

Gerry: No, no. No. No,
no, no, no...

Michael: There was a tie.
It was a tie.

Stephanie: It was a tie.
Gerry: I'll take that...

[Laughter, excited chatter]

Michael: Cheers. Good work.

Stephanie: It was my perfect
Christmas, I think.

I have people I love around
me, amazing food.

The carol concert
was magical in the chapel.

There's been--everything at
Lalande this year,

I've absolutely
loved every minute of it.

Mum is hysterical with
tiredness now,

but a really happy tiredness.

Dick: Merry Christmas,
Stephanie.

Have a good rest because
you'll need all the energy you

can muster for
renovations in the new year.

Next time, Jayne and Steve
continue the race to renovate

their ground floor...

Jayne: We've got a bit of
a problem here

because every time people
go in and out,

they'll take
some of the stones with them

because they're very
loose, you can see.

Dick: and end up
coming unstuck...

Steve: There's
an air bubble here. Look.

Jayne: Oh, God. Ha ha.

Dick: Stephanie takes tips on
distressing mirrors

from Angel.

Angel: Best put
a bit of welly in it.

Stephanie: Elbow grease is my
least favorite form of power.

Angel: Ha ha!

Dick: And as Lee attempts
a DIY roof fix--

Lee: The things I'm doing
to save a few bob.

Dick: his head
for heights deserts him.

Lee: Oh, my God. No.