Endgame (2011): Season 1, Episode 12 - Polar Opposites - full transcript

(rock music)

My eardrums are weeping.

Sam: I could call the front desk again.

Why?

I suspect it is the front desk

who's attempting to torture
me into an earlier checkout.

Sam, you're making the same mistakes

over and over again,
what is wrong with you?

Maybe that's because it's 1:38.

Can I finish losing to you tomorrow?

So you can sleep and I suffer
through this cacophony, no.



Give me a fighting chance.

(people yelling outside)

Is that a uniform or a costume?

Oh, hey Mr. B, yeah they're paying me

to guard the party, pretty sweet, huh?

You're letting the hooligans in.

You're guarding the party backwards.

They bought up the whole floor,

except your suite, of course.

You're the only one complaining, and um...

(rock music)
(people yelling)

Oh, hi, whoa, where we going?

Mr. Balagan, do you know
who's staying in this suite?

Dionysus?



It's Deacon, Demon Spawn.

(loud music)
(yelling)

Hey, nice robe.

I salute your dedication
to indulgence, man,

but I must appeal to
your sense of decency.

My what?

Your sense of decency.

Oh decency, we're not
gonna have any of that

here tonight, are we?

Out of the way, move.

It was your son's bedtime four hours ago

and you said you would sing him a lullaby.

You're right.

♪ Rockabye baby on the treetop ♪

Deacon, deacon!

It's gone, Deeks, somebody took it all.

(body clunks)
(music stops)

Well finally some quiet.

(inquisitive music)

(water trickles)

(relaxed music)

(claps)
Good morning.

Oh, really?

(snaps)

Check this out.

He didn't even need stitches.

Took it like a man, though, didn't you?

Didn't you, my little angel?

Yeah, looks worse than it is.

Did that hurt?

No.

So, if you were to find

what Troy here lost,

what kind of fee are we looking at?

Depends what was stolen.

$200,000.

20% plus expenses.

Okay, no problem, I'll
just go back upstairs

and reread my encyclopedias.

(snaps) 15%, no expenses.

Okay, just take one more up to the bar

and then come back down,
that's only like half of it.

(phone rings)

Hey, Nana Fay, hey, you okay?

Oh, well you know I'm at work,

but what, is it the TV cable again?

Okay, yeah well I can be
there after work around 2:00.

Okay, see you then, bye.

And what was the money for?

I got this guy, Ray, he gets me things.

And Troy asked him to procure for me

a certain little something.

Ooh, was it a Matisse or
a Louis XVI writing desk,

puppets, drugs, what?

Yeah, that's right, drugs.

So, your plan rocked

when it should have rolled.

Yeah, anyway, I met at our usual spot,

this alley off of Seventh.

Yeah and then Troy gets out of the car,

(smacks table)
wham,

someone clocks him and takes my money.

Ooh, clocks you with what?

A wooden bat.

You did not see who the assailant was?

No, but it had to be Ray.

And now he's not answering our calls.

Anybody else who might have known

about the meeting or the money?

That's hard to say.

Hard to say, boy.
(girls giggling)

Oh hi, I mean uh, secrets
are hard to keep on a tour bus.

Arkady: Right, so.

40 people plus stowaways.

Could have been anybody.

Hey, you're gonna
have to earn your 10%.

15%.

So tell me, how much longer do we have

the pleasure of being neighbors?

Well the concert's tomorrow night.

Sunday we jet, is that
gonna be enough time?

Probably not.

You may never see your $200,000
again, will you miss it?

The point is, comrade,

we can't have anyone
ripping off the Demon Spawn.

It's bad for the image.

Mm-hmm.

I'll need this Ray guy's address.

Sam, just go there and talk to Ray.

I don't know, an overdue library book

or a winning lottery ticket.

I have to supervise, I have to go.

He likes swimming, yes you do.

Aww, the spawn of the
Spawn, yes, adorable.

I'm sorry, you are?

Must be difficult getting
your husband's attention, hmm?

What is that supposed to mean?

I saw your performance last night,

it was memorable.

Trust me, no one remembers.

And yet you did marry this
Demon Spawn, did you not?

He didn't used to be like that.

He was a busker playing
folk songs when I met him.

So the actor became the part.

All he needs now is a three-headed dog.

(playful carnival music)
(bat whacks)

Did Mommy bash the
big bad man on the head?

Oh yes she did.

Yes, she did.
(baby whines)

If you want your husband's attention,

why not hit him in the head?

(woman grunts)
(clothes rustle)

(camera clicks)

Worthless junk!

VCRs don't even exist anymore.

Uh, excuse me.

Hi, I'm looking for
Ray, is this the place?

Oh, you're looking for
Ray, well join the club.

Sorry?

Cheating bastard didn't
come home last night.

Oh, so you don't know where he is?

He has uh, overdue library book.

Probably helping his
new girlfriend move.

He rented a van on my credit card.

You must think I'm pretty stupid.

Uh, he didn't mention any money

he might have happened to
just found or something?

Can I hear him on the phone,

Kelly this, Kelly that, I read his texts,

emails Kelly, Kelly, Kelly,

and then I confront him
about it, he just denies it.

Do you know where Kelly lives?

I really need to speak to Ray.

You got a car?

Yeah.

Great, you drive.

(knocking)
Hello?

Hey, what's shakin', Nana Fay?

Oh Danni, have you had some lunch?

Can I get you anything?

No, no, I'm okay.

Perhaps a cup of tea, yes.

Okay, sure, here, got
that Saskatoon berry jam.

Oh bless your kind heart, oh.

Okay so what's the deal,
cable thingy fell out again?

White cable down.

Hey Danni.

You, you look great.

Is this why I'm here?

How could I say no?

I never see the two of
you together anymore.

How much trouble are you in this time?

Trouble, no trouble,
just a little challenge.

I cannot keep bailing you out.

What if this is the last time?

Oh, right.

How much?

More than you have.

Oh, well, sorry, would have more,

but you still owe me 50 grand.

Would either of you
like a piece of cake?

I don't know why I make so much,

I can't eat it myself.

I can't believe you
dragged Nana Fay into this.

I am gonna pay you back every penny

just as soon as you help me
out with this one little thing.

(hums)

Danni, Danni, Danni,

I can't pay you back if I'm dead.

(Danni scoffs)

This is serious.

They're really gonna kill you?

This is why I need you.

Nana: I brought you
a slice of lemon cake,

low cholesterol.

Okay.

(beeping)

Uh, Nana Fay, you're sitting
on your alert thing again.

Oh, yeah you gotta remember
to wear this around your neck.

Oh, but it makes me feel so old.

That's why you have to wear it.

(door slams)

Sam: And he didn't say anything about

delivering something to a rock star?

Ray is always delivering
things to stupid musicians.

Ray!
(doorbell rings)

(banging on door)
Ray!

Yeah, yeah, I'm coming.
Maybe we should just call.

(banging on door)
Hold on, hold on,

hold your horses.
Ray!

Yeah, what's up?

Where is that bitch?

Hey, hey, hey, excuse me.

I know you're here with that tramp.

What are you doing?

My name's Sam, Sam Besht.

Yeah?

We're looking for Ray.

So am I.

Who are you?

I work for Grandmaster Balagan,

we think Ray stole some money.

Yeah, mine.

Yours?

Uh-huh.

He was here with that slut Kelly.

I'm Kelly.

He's cheating on me with you?

What?

(door clatters)

Yeah he's in there,
isn't he, Ray I'm gonna...

(screams)

(roaring)

(mysterious music)

It's a bear.

(bear roars)

Oh.

(elevator dings)

So this Kelly guy said
that Ray was supposed to

pay him 100 grand for the bear.

I emailed these to you.

So Deacon was buying a polar bear?

Well, he is a rock star.

See Luci, I am not the
worst guest in this hotel.

No, Mr. Balagan, you
are the second worst,

and be careful, there is
glass in the carpet, hi Sammy.

So Deacon paid $200,000, yes?

Is Ray going to pocket
the other half or what?

Yeah, Ray's motto, 100% mark-up.

And how did Kelly acquire
this Siberian creature?

He's had it since it was a cub.

It's full-grown now, it's
too expensive to feed.

Did Ray mention any of this to you?

(knocking on door)

I don't know every little
thing that Ray gets up to.

Hey Dr. Zhivago, you find my cash?

We found your certain little something.

You planning on snorting it or smoking it?

Hi.

Not the mesquite, the hickory.

Cool.

Hey, can I get you something to eat?

My special chef here can make anything.

No thank you.

Do all these people ever go away?

Deacon: Oh when they do,
I'll know I'm in trouble.

So, riding a bear to
your next concert, yes?

What happened, your tour bus broke down?

The bear's for my show.

Troy.
(snaps fingers)

Oh yeah, kill the music.

I got this whole laser
light extravaganza planned

with some pyro, Troy.

Girls, beat it.

And at the end, I want to be standing

on the edge of the stage shredding.

(heavy guitar music)
(girls cheer)

And then suddenly, the mighty polar bear

will rise from beneath the
stage like it's about to attack,

and the fans, they're going crazy.

(cheering)

And I turn and I play that mighty beast

right back into submission.

(heavy guitar music)

(blender whirs)

(cheering)

You're speechless, aren't you?

Mm-hmm.

That's all right, most people are.

You know, you should
come check out our show.

I'll get you a couple comps,

Troy, give him some comps.

No, thank you.

And do you have permits to
put this bear in your concert?

Permit, that's cute.

Tell you what,

you just worry about finding my money.

I'll worry about the bear.

(slow rock music)

Gather around, ladies,
this song is for you.

(cheering)

Hey, what's your plan here?

I was thinking number three.

Oh, you can't do number three,

I'm way out of practice.

Two.

No, I'm not wearing the right outfit.

All right then four.

Absolutely not, no.

Babe, you practically invented four.

(sighs)

All right.

God, Ray, I can't believe
I am doing this again.

(breathes heavily)

(knocking)
Hello?

Help!

Please help!
(doorbell rings)

No one's home.

Well even more perfect.

Got this on the internet,

opens any garage door.

What is in here?

You're not gonna believe it. (laughs)

Check this out.

(door groans)
(mysterious music)

What?

Where could it go?

Weird, what are the odds?

A plan of yours actually falling apart.

I got other plans.

(elevator dings)

Lucina, you look like you
worked a whole week in one day.

Mr. Balagan, it's not
just the mess and the smell,

it's that music.

What, you don't like
the sound of people

clubbing each other with bags of cats?

His first album broke new
ground, but this new one?

He sold out.
(bag clatters)

Arkady: Sold out?

And they expect me
to clean for some party

after the concert just
so they destroy it again.

Deacon's lady, the one with the baby,

she was just entertaining one
of the roadies in her room.

Roadies?

You think I don't know rock and roll?

No Lucina, I think you're as complex

as a Shostakovich symphony.

Oh!

Don't suppose there's
a polar bear in there?

No, it's just gear, dude.

Of course.

Look uh, you can
find this money, right?

And what happens to you if I don't?

Nothing, I tune Deacon's guitars,

that's like handing Zeus his thunderbolt.

It's Ray that's got to worry.

He's got a target on his back.

How do you meet a man like Ray?

He ran a booze club, The
Temperance Club, I think,

I don't know, it went belly-up.

It would have been very
easy for you and your friend

to steal Deacon's money together.

You know what?

I ain't got no reason to
stab my boy in the back.

I count 200,000 reasons.

Okay Ray, we're gonna
rip off Deacon together,

so I need you to hit me hard.

Oh, but not too hard.

Oh there's a plan with no holes.

(bat crashes)

(playful carnival music)

(guitar riffs)

Sam I need you do to some digging.

Hello.

Yes, yes, I'm always late, so.

I just spoke with Jason.

And what did Mr. Evans tell you today?

Something big.

Cross-Town Limos, Minute
of Beauties, Tyson's Auto.

A number of companies, yes?

Yes, they're all controlled by one guy,

Sebastian Wilkes, he's the one.

Whatever insane motive
he had Rosemary killed.

Sebastian Wilkes is under investigation

by a federal task force.

Jason can't touch him.

Wait a second, so are all the police

afraid of this Sebastian Wilkes?

Well look, the feds get first dibs.

Okay, after they're through with him,

we can fight over the scraps.

But he said there's
nothing we can do, right?

No, there is nothing they can do,

(phone rings)

But we are not cops, so.

You're right, Pippa, we're not cops.

Sam.

Got the information
you wanted on Ray's club.

You know if the public records
office has lease information?

Nutshell, Sam.

Where are you going?

Right.
To think.

The Temperance Club's space was leased

not by Ray but by a woman
named Ruth Goodwell.

Arkady: So who is this Ruth Goodwell?

It's his wife, got her address too.

Okay Sam, go to Ruth Goodwell's house.

If Ray's there...

Sam: I get my three games?

Yes you will if he's there, bye bye.

What do we do about Sebastian Wilkes?

Nothing.

Seriously?

I need to think.

I know what you're
gonna say, all right,

that the system is rigged

and we can only wallow
in our helplessness.

No Pippa, that's not
what I was going to say.

I was going to say I am thinking

and I cannot do that with
you yapping in my ear.

Yapping?

You can't just spend the
rest of your life thinking,

all right, eventually you
gotta take some action.

You want to attack the king.

The king is protected by pawns.

You must attack the pawns first.

You are just being foolish.

Really, and you're being weak.

You are a selfish little girl

who thinks that reality
will bend to her sorrow.

You know what, Rosemary
would hate to see you like this.

Rosemary's dead.

(tender music)

And you, you don't have the
first idea of what she thought.

Pippa: I knew her a
lot longer than you did.

She used to say things like

"oh, my little sister's so
impulsive and so immature"

"and so impossible."

That's great, now you
want to talk about Rosemary,

it's pretty convenient.

And what about you, hmm?

If she hadn't died, you
wouldn't know what to do

with your life, you got
no purpose, no direction.

You have agoraphobia.

Arkady: Is that what I have?

Yeah, you have agoraphobia

and you need to face it and get some help.

Oh, what a wonderfully simple view.

You North Americans have
cotton candy for brains.

You think you're so much
smarter than everybody.

I am.

Well good for you, because I'm done.

(tender music)
(elevator dings)

(knocking)

Hi there, I'm looking for,

Danni.

Sam.

I'm sorry, I thought this was, um,

I'm looking for Ruth Goodwell.

Yeah, well, you found her.

(playful music)

Did you find this going to see Ray?

What's wrong with your face?

Yes.

Early onset dementia?

You went to Ruth Goodwell's
house looking for Ray,

was he there?

Uh-huh.

And what did he say
about the money or the bear?

You can ask him yourself,
he's in the basement.

He can't come up here though,
they'll rip him to shreds.

(tense music)

Would you like a glass of water or?

Danni is Ruth Goodwell
and she's married to Ray.

Danni?

Is Ruth, I went to
Ruth Goodwell's house,

Danni was there, they're the same person,

she changed her name.

And she's married to Ray, the same Ray.

That I would not have guessed.

Can you just sit in the corner?

Don't touch anything,
like sit on your hands.

I love it when you use
that tone of voice with me.

What tone of voice?

That one.

Shut up.

If you don't stop flirting with me,

I'm gonna have to kiss you.

Oh, what is that thing on your face?

It's called a beard.

Oh, so that's cool?

Ruth!

Ruth?

Oh, hello, Ruth.

So I had this crazy dream
that you were married

to someone who had stolen $200,000

from a rock star staying at the Huxley.

Arkady Balagan, this is Ray,

Ray, this is Arkady Balagan.

Her husband.

Him, Ruth?

Estranged, soon to be divorced.

Yeah, or widowed.

So, this is the guy who was supposed to

find my missing money.

You know what, we did it
your way and it didn't work.

The bear wasn't there,
so we're doing it my way.

Wait, hang on, did you say the
rock star was staying here?

Arkady: Mm-hmm.

Oh, I see.

You asked me to help you
because I work here, didn't you?

Oh, come on.

Married to him, really?

It was a small town and he
was the pick of the litter.

Okay.

I cannot keep running on down here.

What size is your waist?

So, the demon prawn upstairs believes that

you stole his $200,000.

Yeah, I wouldn't rip him off.

His crew are all bikers,
plus he's a Satanist.

And yet you did go to the meeting spot

to collect the money from Troy?

Yeah, and when I got there,
he was already unconscious.

Did you check to see
if the money was there?

I was scared, not stupid.

Money was long gone.

So who else knew
about this arrangement?

No one except Kelly,
the bear guy, obviously.

Tell us about your girlfriend.

She was snooping around,

could she have stumbled upon your plans?

I'm married,

and I don't write my plans down

so anyone can find them.

So that leaves us with no money,

no polar bear, and no fine.

Ruth, hey.

Oh, hi.

Looking good.

Thanks.

I didn't know you
were still in the city.

Yeah, still here.

How are you?

Good, are you helping
this guy find Ray?

Looking, not succeeding.

Has anyone seen him, old friends or?

We're just calling around,
looking, looking, looking.

Oh, look, you should totally
come by for a drink later.

Oh, I'd totally love to.

Don't break my heart.

No, never.

Oh, all right, good seeing you.

Yeah, okay.

Does she know him too?

Not like that.

For a burgeoning metropolis,

this place is like a news bag village.

Met him at the booze inn?

Oh yeah, Troy gave
Ray the start-up cash.

(jazz music)

I lots a lot of money when
Ray's club went belly-up.

Finally some payback.

Okay. (breathes heavily)

(groans)

Okay, this is gonna work.

Here, let me help you.

All right, hide that for me.

Make it look worse than it is.

Oh, don't worry.

(bat smacks)
(crowd cheers)

Big pain, big gain.

(relaxed guitar music)

Hello.

My white knight.

You know, I was just writing a song

about you and my missing Nanook.

Really, there's no need.

You have to sing when
the spirit says sing.

Tragedy (guitar rings)

Is a wicked muse.

And betrayal is a most potent poison.

♪ Betrayal is the most potent poison ♪

But no, who, who is
betraying me, my wise man?

Troy, he stole your
money and blamed it on Ray.

Troy?

Now Troy, I trust with my guitars.

You know what that means?

Of course, then maybe it was your wife

trying to get your attention.

My wife?

Yeah, she resents
your absence as a father.

She is sleeping with one of the roadies.

And I'm sleeping with
all my groupies, so what?

No, it was Ray, Ray
failed to deliver my bear,

Ray stole my money.

If you can't find my cash or my cub,

find Ray and I will cut what
he owes me out of his flesh.

I would pay to see that.

Hey,

it's a piece off an erotic
carving from a temple in India.

(rock music)

The Khajuraho temples, yes I know it.

Yeah, that's right.

I'll let you guess which piece.

You know, you can keep that.

It's supposed to bring you
some love or something.

You look like you could use some.

Maybe you should
write a song about that.

Oh I have, Temple of Love,
six weeks at number one.

(rock music)

Woo!

(playful music)

That one.

Unbelievable, every time.

All right, again.

(door opens)

So um, how are you gonna
find my money exactly?

Because I got the bear guy mad at me

and the deranged rock star
wants to cut my guts out,

and Monday's my stepmom's birthday,

I still haven't gotten her anything.

How could you possibly
have fallen in love with him?

It uh, was a warm summer night.

I was driving my 69 Camaro.

Your friend Darryl's 69 Camaro.

It was rhetorical.

(alarm rings)

Oh, fire alarm.

Smells like smoke.

Told you it was hooked up wrong.

Yeah, and I told you I've
never used one of these before.

That smells like a campfire.

Not the mesquite, the hickory.

Gear lube, yup.

(upbeat music)

The meat smoker, the chef
was going smoke the meat.

What meat?

Arkady: Polar bear meat.

(gasps) What?

Ray, did you know that they
were gonna eat the polar bear?

No.

Why would anyone want
to eat a polar bear?

What do you give the man
who has done everything?

(phone beeps)

That's Nana Fay's emergency alert.

Emergency alert?

More like I can't open
the mayonnaise alert.

Nana Fay, it's Danni, can you pick up?

Pick up, pick up, pick up.

Can you get your coat?

(playful music)

There's nothing to worry about.

She's probably watching
soaps sitting on the thing.

If you say one more
word, it will be your last.

I love you.

(grunts)
Stupid.

Nana Fay?

(somber music)
Nana Fay!

Are you okay?

Where is she?

And you must be Ray.

So good of you to finally
show, you want a drink?

Here, let him go, he didn't steal it.

Deacon: That's based on his reputation.

Danni, take Ray back to
my suite and wait for me.

Ray, go.

I have no idea what
you're talking about, Ray.

Hey, what's going on?

What are you doing here?

Oh.

Did you tell him about my Nana Fay?

Ray, Ray, Ray!

Ray, Ray, look.

Ray I, I am so, so sorry,
I was just hanging out,

I had no idea I was
putting Nana Fay in danger,

I swear, Ray.

If something happened to my granny,

I think that would make me go mad.

Here's some advice from
someone who knows, okay?

When all your money and all
your sycophants are gone,

and the world has forgotten
about your ridiculous music,

you will look back on these days and say...

I want my polar bear!

Really?

Get him out of here.

The police aren't gonna do anything

until she's missing for 24 hours.

Don't worry, we will find her.

Ray, I want you to call your friend Kelly.

(phone dials)

Kelly, call me back, they took my nana.

I need the bear.

Why isn't Kelly calling anyone back?

I thought you said he needs money.

(dramatic music)

Look, I know you don't want
to give up the bear, Kelly,

but this rock star really wants her.

How much, Ray?

A hundred grand.

(cash register clinks)

All right, take it, I'm desperate.

Yeah.

Ray, you're useless.

Hey, Farley Moen, it's Deacon again.

Pick up your damn phone.

I'll cough up another hundred grand,

I still want your polar bear.

No thanks, I'm not interested.

Something's changed.

Kelly doesn't need the money
because he took the money.

He was waiting for you.

Kelly stole the money
I was gonna pay him?

He was going to sell his beloved beast

because he could no
longer afford to feed it,

but $200,000 buys a lot of fish, yes?

Just takes the cash, keeps the cub.

I'll kill him.

So in order to save Nana Fay,

we must double cross the double crosser.

How do we do that?

We go on a bear hunt.

So Ray, how do you know this Kelly?

He delivers the newspaper,

tells me when people are on vacation.

And you just break in and
take what you like, is that it?

It's a living.

That's nice, Ray.

Ah, photos of Kelly's house.

So you say the bear was
not in the garage, correct?

Temporary housing would be
the logical alternative then.

In his truck.

Are you familiar with his route?

Every street.

Wouldn't he have gotten
out of town already?

No, Kelly doesn't believe
that anyone suspects him.

All he has to do is wait until Sunday

when the demon goes down to Georgia.

On his next tour date in Georgia.

Okay.

You know what could work?

Number seven.

Seven?

Seven?

(playful music)

Be right back, Coco.

Ow, ow!

Oh my gosh.

(groans)
Hey, hey, hey, you okay?

Oh my knee.

Oh, yeah, well. (groans)

Oh, thanks.

Can you walk, you okay?

Try it.

Now I'm fine.

Here's your bike.

So silly, thank you so much, sorry.

You sure you're okay?

Oh yeah, no, I'm fine, thank you.

Yeah, drive safe now.

Okay, thanks.

(playful music)

Ray!

(bear growls)

Ray, Ray!

Ray, Ray!

I'm gonna get you!

(upbeat rock music)

Yuck.
(phone dings)

Ladies, ladies, ladies, come on.

You can't go up there without a lanyard,

but if you come to my office,
tell me what you need...

Arkady: Hugo.

Just a sec, I'm in the
middle of a very important

security operation, Balagan.

Yes, I can see that,
I have something for you.

What do you want?

IOU time.

Come on,

surely that thing is past
it's best before date.

(girls giggle)

I hate you.

I'm hurt.

(chuckles)

Yes, it is indeed a bear.

Yeah.

(bear roars)

Now that is what I'm talking about.

Now where's my Nana Fay?

Who?

Hey, hey!

You have your bear, now
give him back his grandmother.

You know, I think
you'll find the best thing

to do right now is uh,
relax and have a drink.

Relax, how can I relax?

He's saying that your
grandmother is in a bar, Ray.

Ray, when's this butcher coming here?

Soon.
(bear growls)

No, no, no, no, no,
you're staying here with me.

No, I'm done, I got
my Nana Fay kidnapped,

okay, the old Ray has given
notice and he's leaving town.

The new Ray has landed at the airport

and he's trying to get a cab.

Ray, come back.

Look, I want him standing
right here beside me

in case anything goes wrong with that.

Don't let him out of your sight.

(bear growls)

I'll check on your nana.

(growls)

Oh, Nana Fay.

Oh, hi.

Hi, hi, hi, hi, hi.

Oh god, you're safe, are you okay?

Oh yeah.

They didn't hurt you?

No, no, one of the men,

he gave me a glass of $300 scotch.

That's not bad for a retired miller.

I'll say, oh, Nana Fay,

I'd like you to meet my
friend Arkady Balagan.

Arkady, Nana Fay.

A pleasure.

Your grandson is a lovely child.

Fay: Thank you.

If you'll excuse me,
I must arrange dinner.

(Nana Fay chuckles)

Okay, one of you guys is gonna watch.

Oh, yeah.

Okay, one thing you gotta know is

if I don't use a stun
gun like the other guys.

I like to go old school.
(knife clinks)

One clean cut to the esophagus,

trachea, carotid artery, and jugular.

It practically takes the head off.

Now they kick and scream
while they're bleeding out,

but it is good, good, good for the meat.

Oh, you're gonna need these too,

gets a little messy.

(bear growls)

You know, I'm cool, I'm good.

You sure?

Yeah, yeah, I'm good.

Don't worry, man, I got this.

(bear growls)

All right, let's skin this sucker.

Yeah, yeah, no, you know
what, you're good, you're good.

Let's do it.

(speaking in foreign language)

Dead bear on a plate,
as per your request.

Brilliant.

(sighs)

I swear I can feel the beast's power

still pulsating in its flesh.

Let's get smoking.

Bear in mind, Balagan,

I did the bare minimum, but in the end,

I grinned and beared it.

(bear pants)

Living in captivity is
not easy, is it, my friend?

Don't worry, very soon
you will be free to roam,

smell the fresh air.

(bear growls)

You might meet some new friends.

Maybe you'll meet your mate, fall in love.

What do you think of that?

(bear grunts)

Oh, Cocoa, daddy bear
was so worried, yeah.

200,000?

Uh-huh, I uh, I just want
to take Cocoa home, okay?

Cocoa will not be going
home with daddy today

or any other time.

Wait, you said if I brought the money,

I could take her back.

$100,000 that Ray
promised you for this bear,

who you stored illegally in your garage,

an undeserved sentence for
such a magnificent creature.

I found her a real home.

But she's my bear.

You cannot afford to keep a polar bear

on a newspaper boy salary.

Kelly: Oh, but I...

You have three minutes
to say your goodbyes.

Three minutes?

(bear grunts)

I would have given anything

for three minutes to say goodbye.

(tender music)

(bear grunts)

Cocoa.

Hudson, bravo,

this is like nothing I've ever tasted.

We are feasting on the hunter,

the most lethal killer
on the Arctic tundra

lies before us on my dinner table.

All hail ursus rockandrollicus.

(cheering)

I want you so bad right now.

My angel shall have
her spoils repeatedly.

Hello everybody, how is
your teddy bear's picnic?

Oh, Ray totally came through,

this feast is fit for a king.

You want a nibble?

No, no, thank you.

Eating endangered species
really gets my goat.

Whoa, what's that?

It's $50,000.

(chuckles)

It's your debt to Danni.

Yeah, see, told you
I'd pay you back, babe.

Did? (laughs)

So, where's my cut?

Well, after my finder's
fee and Danni's debt

and the cost of sending Cocoa
to the wildlife preserve,

your cut is zero.

I get nothing?

Not nothing, you.

Come with me.

(door clatters)

He's your problem now.

So you weren't cheating on me then?

No, you're like the moon
to my tides, you pull me.

Jesus, those were our wedding vows.

(door clatters)

Not bad, ruski.

You saved Nana Fay, rescued a polar bear.

Cleared up your horrendous debt.

I know.

Danni, a tchotchke.

Keep it.

(playful music)

(king clatters)

(relaxed music)