Ed Sheeran: The Sum of It All (2023): Season 1, Episode 4 - Episode #1.4 - full transcript

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So the loop pedal, a key to it is timing.

So you basically...
You press... You press that and record.

And the... Getting it on the one
is the most important thing.

So, one, two, three, four, one.

If you get that wrong,
you can go, one, two, three, four.

Then for the rest of the song it's just…

And you just have to get the timing right.

I'll do, um...
I'll show you "Shape of You." So...

Can I get the guitar in, Chris?

And then you put in the...

And once that base is down,
you're kind of good.



So you add the keys.

Then the sort of chanty singing.

Then the guitar.

So the most exciting bit is running on…

Right. Sing it out with me!

…and then clicking one off and then…

♪ The club isn't the best place
To find a lover ♪

♪ So the bar is where I go ♪

♪ Me and my friends
Sat at the table doing shots ♪

♪ Drinking fast and then we talk slow ♪

♪ And you come over
And start up a conversation with just me ♪

♪ And trust me
I'll give it a chance now ♪

♪ Take my hand, stop ♪

I started out my career
just playing completely solo.



I mean, for the past ten years,

it's just been me
and a loop pedal onstage.

Any mistake I make is on me.

Anytime it goes well, it's on me.

♪ Come on now follow my lead
Mm-hmm ♪

♪ I'm in love with the shape of you ♪

There are no backing tracks.
It is just this every night.

It's built up from scratch,
and then it's deleted.

♪ Every day discovering
Something brand new ♪

♪ I'm in love with your body ♪

♪ Come on, I'm in love with your body ♪

♪ Every day discovering
Something brand new ♪

Zurich!

♪ I'm in love with the shape of you ♪

Thank you so much! We'll see you tomorrow!

The Union Chapel gig was
definitely like no other.

I've seen Ed perform for years and years.

And it was like no other gig
I've ever seen.

He looked vulnerable, didn't he?

Yeah.

Ed is always in control. And he's
always been in control of his plan.

He knows what he's doing.

Um, he's such a confident performer.

And he's now performing work that,

for the first time ever,
is his deepest, darkest fears, I guess.

And that's a difficult thing to perform.

And now stage is not his safe place.
Or it wasn't.

I've never seen him cry onstage.

Um, he doesn't really cry in general.
That's really unusual to see him cry.

But I just don't think
he's had the time to…

Uh, he hasn't had the time
to sit with his thoughts.

And I can't see when he's gonna have that
in the next four years.

Ed Sheeran is taking us to school
with the name of his North American tour.

It's the Mathematics Tour.

The tour kicks off on May 6
in Arlington, Texas.

Good morning, America.

And it's barely morning.

That's not good.

It's early.

And, um, yeah.
Gonna go on and launch the tour.

Hopefully people buy tickets.

It's my guy, Ed Sheeran.

The North American leg of the
Ed Sheeran Tour. You gotta get tickets.

Please welcome back Ed Sheeran.

Ed Sheeran is here.
What's up, my brother?

What's going on? Happy to be back.

The tour,
fireworks, explosions, everything.

♪ I took an arrow to the heart ♪

♪ I never kissed a mouth
That tastes like yours ♪

Ticket sales are going live in an hour.

♪ Strawberries and somethin' more ♪

- Hey!
- Hey!

Chez, Jupes is sitting up.

A new album comes out
beginning of the year.

This is the tour
everyone's gonna be talking about.

Here he is. Ed Sheeran.

Best artist ever.

It has been five years
since you were last here.

It feels like it's time to come back.

Thank you for coming in today.

So I played this venue...

I think it was
the second venue I played in the States.

You spend your whole life as a musician
wondering if you can break America.

This was... This venue was when I was like,
"Oh, it's starting."

I'm just remembering now looking at...

No, it was in... It was in that bit.
It was in that bit with the, uh, window.

I sat there and did
an acoustic session of "A Team,"

and then I covered Ginuwine "Pony."

I remember the night playing this show.

It was the night before
the album came out.

And then we went up to the dressing room
upstairs and downloaded it on iTunes.

And then Stu gets a text

with a screens hot
that it'd gone Number 1 on iTunes.

And everyone was very emotional.

Yep.

I felt like when Jamal died,
I wanted the entire world to stop.

And it just felt like the next day,
life just resumed.

Does that make…

I felt embarrassed.

Um, 'cause it was a room full of people
I didn't really know.

And they had come for a good night,
and my job is to be an entertainer.

And I didn't feel like
an entertainer that night.

I felt like a...
Just a man onstage, talking.

I don't get emotional onstage,
but the Jamal thing is still really raw

because it only happened a few months ago.

And also, I don't think there's been time.

And I feel like that's just part of life.

You can't let these things, uh,
dominate your life.

But then maybe that's bad

'cause you suppress them, and then
you don't process them. But I don't know.

♪ Then life goes on ♪

I woke up this morning not feeling great.

You know, I'm away from Cherry
and the kids for ten days.

Cherry's struggling.

And this trip is longer
than I expected it to be.

On The Divide Tour,

there would be times
when it was a good couple of months

that we didn't see each other.

Every single week,
I got a postcard coming through the door.

It's just a really lovely, sweet thing.

And it just kinda kept me connected,
I guess,

with where he was
and what he was doing and…

They all say exactly the same thing,
so there's really not much, uh…

Man of a few words, weirdly.

Um, so they literally say,
"Wish you were here."

Except for, he'll kill me for saying this,
the one that says, "Wish you were her."

So, you know,
that got the old mind racing.

I do remember being sad and missing him.

But it was much easier
just to get on a plane and go and see him.

There was a couple of times
I surprised him, which was amazing.

Now we've got a family,

it's just more complicated.

I totally knew what I was getting into,
but there's definitely aspects of it

which is a lot harder
than I thought it was going to be.

Ed will never stop doing what he's doing.

It's really important that he carries on.

I think he's doing something
incredibly special.

I really wanna be able to support that
and support him.

But at the same time,
preserving our family.

So it's about striking that balance,
I guess.

A little duck for Lyra
and a little duck for Jupes.

Happy days.

I think, yeah, this has definitely been
the most difficult trip

in terms of strain on my family.

Um…

Yeah.

I feel like we just need to shift,
um, the way we do things.

Um…

And make it more family-friendly.

I find so much joy in what I do,
and I feel like it brings happiness to me.

So it's just about a balance of having…

Um, not overdoing it.

But then also my personality is
to overdo everything all the time.

Just nothing is gonna fit in these bags.

See.

Okay.

With this album,
I don't know what it's gonna do.

And you know, I hope people connect to it.

But also, I understand if they don't.

Um, 'cause they are personal stories.

I feel like if someone came up to me

and went, "I like the album."
I'd be like, "That's good."

But if someone came
and said they didn't like the album,

I'd be like, "I don't really care."

I don't really care.

There's gonna be a lot of, um,
conflicting things that I've just said.

'Cause I'll say one thing
and then think another. I don't know.

I'm over thinking it.

- Mike?
- Big Man.

Big Man.

How you doing?

You sailing?

- What's going on?
- I'm all right.

Any time we come together
personally or musically, it's great.

♪ Jet plane headed up to the sky ♪

Here on
the "Take Me Back to London" video.

This is actually the first video
that me and Mike have done together.

Bit too, uh... bit too short
for the music video.

♪ But now I'm back in the track
With Big Michael ♪

♪ He said
"Teddy, never get off your high horse" ♪

I don't have
a lot of really close industry friends,

but he's one of my closest.

♪ To the sky ♪

He comes to me for advice.
I go to him for advice.

And he's been invaluable
in terms of sanity.

♪ So take me back to London ♪

- Let's do something.
- I'm in.

- Yeah? What should we do?
- Yeah, yeah, I'm in.

I feel like whatever we do
has to go Number 1 now.

I hear that.

I hear that. I've got three Number 1s.
Two of them are with him.

I'm glad you wanna do something.

- Yes, that's good.
- Yeah, man. Yeah.

This is my first time
putting out something

where I'm not completely certain
of how it's gonna be.

I knew that "Perfect"
would be Christmas Number 1.

I knew... Just had this vision
of this is what I know and this is...

But I have no idea
how this is gonna be taken.

With Subtract, what do you want?

'Cause sometimes, what we do as artists...

- You put it out and go…
- Yeah.

We say, "I just want to be free."

And then you're like, "Oh, is it
selling much?" You know what I mean?

So you've gotta really say,
"Yo, this is what I wanna achieve."

- And just go on that full run of it.
- Mmm.

- Especially, it's... Yeah, but...
- It's terrifying, isn't it?

That is just our job as an artist.

And it is a scary, vulnerable,
but very exciting, very fruitful position,

where it's like, "Hey, okay."

If I think of my role in this world,
I'm a musician, so I make music.

And I'm an artist,
so my music reflects my life.

Also, you sort of get to a point
in your career

where you make something
that's worth being quiet for.

- Yeah.
- You know?

Wow, that's a good way to put it.

You make something worth being quiet for.
Yeah, man.

Plus, also, you've just…
You've earned your rep.

It's scary putting out
your sort of deepest,

darkest thoughts to the world.

The first half of this year
was a very difficult part

of the last 30 years of my life.

There's an umbrella over that time
which is just a bit of a blur.

But all of these songs came out.

Those songs were so personal to me

that no one can take away from me
what those mean.

I'm a pop star who every time I release
people check and listen to it,

and they go,
"Is it a hit? Is it not a hit?"

But I had to make it.

And I'm gonna put it out
because I want to put it out.

'Cause I wanna be able to play shows
and express myself.

I think you have to be honest
and write about where your life is

rather than just trying to do things
that you think people want to hear.

Cheers, boo.

- Happy date day.
- Happy date day.

- Thanks so much.
- The things these four walls have heard.

This is just our sacred space.

I actually feel being together again
after being in New York, um...

'Cause I said I would never spend more
than ten days away from Chez and the kids.

And I actually think ten days is
actually way too long.

And also,
if there's tension and arguments,

I lose the ability to be like,
"Hey. I love you."

- Yeah, yeah.
- You know? Because you're like...

It's the touch.
It's like... Yeah, it's like...

- It's being like, "We're good."
- "We're okay. We're fine."

- You lose that when you're away.
- 'Cause it's all over WhatsApp.

And I'll call Eds,
and he'll be on his iPad in the car.

- And there'll be…
- Thank you.

…four other people in the car.

He'll be like, "How you going?"
You know, "What's going on?"

- And I'm like, "Well…"
- Thank you.

…everything's falling apart,

"but I can't tell you that
'cause everyone's listening in." It...

- So you have the level of detachment.
- Thank you.

- There you go.
- Thank you.

It's so good. Thank you.

I feel like my life eventually has to…

Naturally plateau.

Just to be kind to my children.

I don't want to be, uh,

"Hey, we're gonna do two years here
and three here and one here."

I want them to be like…

I worry about that for you though.

'Cause I don't think
you're programmed that way.

That make sense?

And now we're working out
real-life shit over an interview.

Um. No, I don't know, 'cause I feel...

I've been coming to terms with it a lot

because careers naturally plateau
at certain points.

And I think by the time
that Lyra and Jupes are in school,

the world will have naturally said,
"We're good."

- Mmm. What do you think...
- And I'm...

How do you think
you're gonna cope with that?

Not well.
I don't think anyone copes with that well.

You get into the music industry
to make people want to like your music.

And the moment that they say,
"Well, actually we prefer this,"

I think it's quite a difficult thing.

- It makes me worried.
- Do people like your stuff?

I like my stuff, but my career is dictated
by whether other people like my stuff.

- And I feel like you really care as well.
- Course I care.

If I didn't care what people think,
I wouldn't put it out.

I would just make it.

We'll see what happens, hey?

You're going on a spa day, right?

Uh, spa day. Mom is coming.

- Um…
- If you do your spa,

I might take Lyra to the zoo again.

I promise not to give her
the same lunch though.

There's definitely a cloak
of invisibility that falls over you

when you come to Suffolk.

What's going on? How you doing?

- What's going on?
- How are you?

I have my memories
and friends and family in one place.

And I feel like there's a force field
around Suffolk that protects me.

There goes the full-time whistle.

And Ipswich Town come back
to win this one.

Us, yeah, we won.

Being here and being able
to just be present, help and work is,

yeah, I think the golden ticket.

I cannot stress how unusual it is to have
Eds at home for a long period of time.

So…

I'd say the last kind of year and a half
has been a big transition phase for us.

Oh, it's cold.

Everything is about balance, and I think
that's one way he's massively changed.

Just trying to weave in
a lot more personal time.

I think now is the only time
he's really taken a step back, I think,

and started to just process everything,

um, and given him...
Himself the mental space.

I think it's really healthy for him
to put something out in the world

that he is emotionally attached to

but is happy for it just to be
and have its place in the ether.

Um, whether or not he will feel that way
when it's out, I don't know.

And we'll see.

Just talking about you, my friend.

Yeah, great.

Just made a song with Cradle of Filth.

Do you know Cradle of Filth?

It's... It's random 'cause he's in
a hard-core metal band,

but is from Suffolk and loves Christmas.

You had a good day?

I'm really tired.

Me too.

Anyway…

All right, boo. Love you.

- Can you speed it up 2 bpm?
- Yeah.

Ed, do you have another XLR cable?

- Probs.
- Mic cable.

Fred, I would like some credit
that I know what an XLR cable is.

Well, that's why...
Did you hear me say, "mic cable"?

We are in studio.

I've written my F64,
and Fred is gonna make the beat for it.

The thing is, me and Fred come together

and make songs that become massive
and that everyone knows.

But we also create songs that no one
hears that are also quite important to me.

Am I right in saying that, Fred?

A hundred percent.

F64 is basically, um... was sort of
one of the main things on SBTV.

And Jamal would basically just get

the best of the best to do 64 bars
that are exclusive to SBTV.

When he passed away, his sister said,
"We're gonna relaunch them again.

And can you be the first one?"

♪ …my brother ♪

- Yeah.
- ♪ Been a long ♪

♪ Been a long time
But I cry 'cause I miss my brother ♪

♪ You know for life
Got your sis and mother ♪

♪ …that you're gone ♪

♪ Hey, yo, we cried for nine nights
In your family home ♪

♪ Laid you to rest in the ground
But without a stone ♪

♪ And it hits me most at… ♪

Beautiful.

♪ Cried for nine nights
At your family home ♪

♪ Laid you to rest in the ground
But without a stone ♪

♪ And now it hits me most at moments… ♪

You know it hits me most at moments
now when I... Yeah. Cool.

What if you went…

Yeah.
♪ Cried for nine ♪

No, 'cause I wanna keep this…
I wanna save going up there.

That's…
We're going…

♪ Lying in your family home ♪

Yeah, I feel like it's not emotive.

Okay.

♪ Yo, Jam, this is a letter to you ♪

♪ It's been a while, but it's been
Hard for me to get in the booth ♪

♪ And since we last spoke
I've become a father of two ♪

♪ Trying to live life with a smile
But that's been harder to do ♪

♪ 'Cause all I wanna do is talk about ♪

- It's gonna be great.
- Oh, Fred.

It's like you've done this before.

Oh, bloody hell.

Wow.

That is so crazy.

I just...
I really wish that he could see this.

Just... He would be so gassed about this.

The fact that it's an SBTV F64
and it's the first one I've done,

and then it's being done
at Stamford Bridge,

which is his favorite football team.

And the fact that they've done...

That is so mad. That's so mad.

I can't wait for his mom and sister
to come. They're gonna love that.

Wow.

Yeah. The thing is,
I couldn't do anything else after this.

This is... This is as good as it gets
for him in terms of a tribute.

♪ Yo ♪

♪ Gas, burst the pipe
Next thing bursting a nine ♪

That's only 50 seconds.

I can't really do more.
I don't know all the song.

Hey, Ed!
Say hello to the camera, SBTV.

♪ You need me, man
I don't need you ♪

♪ Yo, Jam, this is a letter to you
It's been a while ♪

♪ But it's been hard for me
To get in the booth ♪

♪ Since we last spoke
I've become a father of two ♪

♪ Trying to live life with a smile
But that's been harder to do ♪

♪ 'Cause all I wanna do
Is talk about you ♪

♪ But these tears
Won't let me talk about you ♪

♪ We should've known
That we'd be lost without you ♪

♪ Therapy sessions
Digging deep in depression ♪

♪ I got a life full of blessings
But this just breaks my **** heart ♪

♪ At your birthday
Couldn't even crack a smile ♪

♪ I just cried and left the party
Neesh, I'll see you in a while ♪

♪ Headed to the mural
Got some jerk wings and plantain ♪

♪ 'Cause that is the way
That me and you would celebrate it ♪

♪ I never knew you touched the stuff
'Cause you'd always bad me up ♪

♪ If you saw me more than drunk
You always hated what it does ♪

♪ Before Lyra, I just stopped
I haven't even wanted one ♪

♪ I can't get over, this is ****
Man, I wish I'd known ♪

♪ And yo, we cried for nine nights
At your family home ♪

♪ Laid you to rest in the ground
But without a stone ♪

♪ You know it hits me most at moments
Now when I'm alone ♪

♪ Every morning
I remember that you're really gone ♪

♪ 'Cause it's been a long night and I cry
'Cause I miss my brother ♪

♪ You know for life
Got your sis and mother ♪

♪ And day and night
It still hits that you're gone ♪

♪ And right now
I'm spilling tears in my cup ♪

♪ You left the world
Before you met Jupiter ♪

♪ Wish you'd have known
You would be godfather ♪

♪ You would've loved
Loving my little girls ♪

♪ If not for them
I'd be done with the world ♪

♪ Was there two hours after you passed ♪

♪ Speeding east to west
Silent in the back of the car ♪

♪ Was at your mum's, there all week
Trying to make sense, but I can't ♪

♪ And although it's been a year
Still feel the pain in my heart ♪

♪ You were there from the start ♪

♪ The day we met, yeah
I moved in, and we were never apart ♪

♪ People assumed that we were lovers
But we're brothers in arms ♪

♪ Symbiotic bond of love
And gave each other a chance, my God ♪

♪ Ah, **** sake ♪

♪ Lately I've been crying so much
My lungs ache ♪

♪ Teardrops all over my shirt
Like bloodstains ♪

♪ And I know to heal a heart
It must break ♪

♪ But I'm done praying ♪

♪ They gave me a shovel at your burial ♪

♪ And watching you get lowered is
Something I can't forget at all ♪

♪ And people find
And stop me in the street ♪

♪ And say it's terrible ♪

♪ But they don't know you like I knew you
And they never will ♪

♪ No one saw the nights turn into day
When we were battle rapping ♪

♪ No one saw the belly laughs
And every train to somewhere random ♪

♪ No one saw the holidays
And then our first experience clubbing ♪

♪ No one saw the things you did for me
And never asked for nothing ♪

♪ No one read the conversations
Of the moves that we were planning ♪

♪ No one knew about the way you felt
The scene left you abandoned ♪

♪ No one knew about your fears
'Cause you would hide 'em with a smile ♪

♪ No one knew when people took an inch
You would give 'em a mile ♪

♪ 'Cause that was always Jamal ♪

♪ SB to the crowd ♪

♪ They used to shout your net worth
But they don't mention it now ♪

♪ They talk about your good deeds
And infectious smile ♪

♪ A golden heart that's still remembered
Is worth more than a crown ♪

♪ I promised 64 bars
And now I keep it to Tanisha ♪

♪ Mommy, Isaac, the gang
I just wish that you'd seen it ♪

♪ I can't accept that you're gone
Or the grief that I'm feeling ♪

♪ I prayed to God for answers
But he still won't give me a reason ♪

♪ I think about you every day
Nothing will take this pain away ♪

♪ I keep your legacy amazing, mate ♪

♪ The conversations at your grave's
The only way to be close ♪

♪ I know you'll greet me with a smile
On the day that I go ♪

♪ 'Cause it's been a long night and I cry
'Cause I miss my brother ♪

♪ You know for life
Got your sis and mother ♪

♪ You know I cry
'Cause I miss my brother ♪

♪ My brother was SBTV ♪

How do you feel now that you've done it?

- Kinda empty. Yeah.
- Yeah.

- It looks amazing.
- Do you know what I mean?

- You kind of…
- It's just beautiful.

- But you like...
- You want a tissue?

No, I'm good. You build it up,
and then it's done, and you're like...

- What now?
- Yeah.

I do believe in the afterlife.

And I do believe that
people do go somewhere.

And I do believe that, one day,
I will see him again.

And this will be the first thing
that he's like,

"Oh, my God! Can't believe you did that!"

Yesterday,
I had my follow-up MRI scan of my arm

just to see if the tumor had come back.

We kind of were both silent in the car
on the way

because we were both so worried that,
you know, it could be bad.

It was obviously super triggering

being in the same room as when things
weren't looking so positive

at the start of the year.

And we saw the surgeon.
He looked at the scans.

Um, and it all looks…

It all looks good.

Lymph nodes are all calmed down
and everything.

So, um. So that was amazing.

It was massive for us, actually.

Right.

- You need your, um... Oh, you have it.
- I have my knife.

I was gonna say,
"You need your package-opener."

- I don't know if it's that way.
- Why don't we just slide them out?

Oh, no, no, no. Oh, yeah.

I didn't realize it was opened.

You just wanna use
your package-opening knife.

I always want to use
my package-opening knife.

Ah, Crying Man.

I actually can't remember
what it looked like. It was so long ago.

Crying man.

Mmm.

I don't think I've got the wingspan.

Hey.

- They do actually look great, don't they?
- They're not too bad.

Mine's a bit darker.

This is my husband.

On canvas.

I really like it.

I feel like I've aged
about three years since we did these.

It feels like this was very much
where we were at at the time.

And we're entering into 2023,
and have you told them about yesterday?

- Yeah, I did. I did. So it's all positive.
- Yeah, cool.

So all great news.

And heading into a year where, hopefully,
it's all good news.

And doing this,
I remember that being a complete,

accurate reflection of what Eds was like
behind closed doors.

Like, he was pretty…

You were still in a pretty erratic state,
I would say, emotionally.

Um, but I don't... I genuinely think...
I feel like you're in a really good place.

I don't think you're... I don't think...

Yeah, I feel great.
I feel excited about, um, the next album.

- You haven't been excited for ages.
- Super pumped.

Yeah, super pumped.

Would you like a potato?

Happy New Year.

Happy New Year. Happy New Year.

I've had all the milestones.

These numbers and stats and figures
are all things that,

in my early 20s, were super exciting.

Never gonna have a "Shape Of You" again.
Never gonna have a Divide Tour again.

Never gonna have... If I keep chasing that,
I'm always gonna be unhappy.

So it's about finding different things
to find happiness in.

I think everything's in perspective.

We've got another daughter now.

And nothing matters
other than health and time with people.

♪ Our father who art in heaven ♪

It's gonna be difficult
to not view 2022 as "the year when."

But I'd love to just view it
as the year when Jupes was born.

Five! Four! Three! Two!

One!

Happy New Year!

No one ever really
has it truly figured out.

And I feel like every week I'm learning

and, um, becoming more of an adult.

Yay!

Happy New Year!

- Love you.
- Love you.

Life is unpredictable, but life goes on.

And you just take it one day at a time.

Nice, man.

And then fireworks, and then kissing,
and then Disney!

Oh, so actually you need to see this.

So Ed has a... an alter ego.

Um, what's your alter ego? Joanne...

- Dianne.
- Dianne.

♪ I have grown up
I am a father now ♪

♪ Everything has changed
But I am still the same somehow ♪

♪ You know
I've never been afraid of death ♪

♪ But now I wanna see the things
That haven't happened yet ♪

♪ I still love getting out of my mind
I should cut it down ♪

♪ I still know people I don't like
And I should cut them out ♪

♪ I feel embarrassed
'Bout the things that I did in my youth ♪

♪ 'Cause now I have a child ♪

♪ I know one day that
She'll go through it ♪

♪ Time stops to still ♪

♪ When you are in my arms
It always will ♪

♪ And life ♪

♪ Life is changin' tides ♪