Dynasty (2017–…): Season 3, Episode 18 - You Make Being a Priest Sound Like Something Bad - full transcript

Cristal's big charity event approaches; Fallon searches out the perfect wedding gift for Liam.

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Previously onDynasty...KIRBY: Next time I tell you

you're being used,
maybe you'll listen.

DOMINIQUE:
You should scold me
in front of Michael.

That way he stays
invested in you

and the House of Deveraux.

They played me for the show.

Can you get the pills?

I'd have to find a way to
steal them from the hospital.

LAURA:
I'm going to fire

Carrington Atlantic's CEO,

and the path will be clear
for you to own C.A. again.



BLAKE:
I do appreciate
a woman who knows

how to get her hands dirty.

I do have feelingsfor you, Cristal.

What do we do now?This.

["Jet Fighter"
by The Three O'Clock playing]

♪ Jet fighter man,
that's what I am ♪

♪ 'Cause tanks go too slow...

Hi there.

Hey.You're up early.

Couldn't sleep.
Too much nervous energy.

Well, if you wantanother way to burn off energy,

you can always jump offthat bike and onto me.

[chuckles] No, it's just
this clinic fundraiser

is a never-ending to-do list.



Is that new priest
from the hospital,

is he helping you with this?

Uh-- no, he's not much help.

I'll be fine.

How did you even know
I was in here?

Fitness app.

I'm surprised to see you
already up.

I heard the shower go on late.

Oh. Yeah, I'm sorry.

I tried not to wake you,
but I smelled like a humidor

on my way in.

You know, after an afternoon
of contracts and lawyers,

I got a little carried away
celebrating at the cigar club.

But... once the ink is dry,

Carrington Atlantic
is mine again.

That's wonderful.Yeah.

You know what else
is wonderful?

Now that all these shenanigans
are done,

you'll be seeing more of me.

And after the gala, I'll be ableto say the same thing.

Though I do need to see more ofyou, specifically this evening.

We havea dance lesson.[chuckles]

The hospital board
somehow convinced me

that we should end the gala
with a special dance.

I'll be there.

But I'm counting that
as exercise on this app.

God, you're so far ahead of me,
you're putting me to shame.

[chuckles] [knocking on door]

I need a list
of all the best presents

I gave youwhile we were dating.

Uh, come in.Sorry.

Thank you.
So, I may have accidentally

discovered Liam's
wedding gift to me.

And by"accidentally,"

I mean I was looking for it,

I didn't think I was gonna
find it, but then I did.

And it's beyond perfect,

and now I can't risk
being outdone.

Look at this.

[sighs]It's our first marriage license.

From when we met

at City Hall.
He had it framed and matted.

I can't believe he held onto it.

You didn't put it back
where you found it?

Oh, don't worry.
Liam is out of town.

We have to pretend to be
broken up so his mother

will give C.A. backto my father; it's a long story.

So, gifts?

Start with
the most expensive one.

Well, look at what he got you.
It's not about money.

It should be
something meaningful.

So what are some meaningfulgifts that I got you?

Meaningful to Liam.

I know. I know.
But ever since I found this,

I haven't been able
to think of one.

What's with
all the dirty clothes?

And the, uh, the dead plant?

Hey, look.
It's called being a bachelor.

I can do or not do my laundry
whenever I want.

Mm-hmm.

Well, it seems like
you chose to notdo.

And that, that is my mail.

Look at that.Are you going to Cristal's gala?

I guess so.

Wait.

I didn't know Kelly and Donna
were performing.

Do you know who they are?

They are Liam's favorite band.

Yes, he plays their song
"Lovelorn" all the time.

Like, weirdly, a lot.

[gasps]

This is the perfect present.

You're gonna invite him
to the gala?

No! No.
I am going to do one better.

I am going to get
Kelly and Donna

to perform at my wedding.

So, how excited are we
about tonight?

Weare not excited
about anything,

because I am still
mad at you

for ignoring me about
your friend Ramy

and then lying
to me about it.

But we have plans
to go see Taylor Swift.

That's not happening. I
don't even like Taylor.

Okay, A] that's a sentenceI don't understand;

B] why did you agreeto go months ago, then?

Because I was being nice.And we were still friends then.

But if you ever
listened to me,

you would know that
I don't like her.

I do listen to you, Kirby.

Who's my favorite band?

[clears throat]

Um...Moaning Lisa.

She actually
doesn't sound familiar.

She is a them. See?
You don't listen.

And going to a concert togetherwould be something

that friendswould do.

And right now, this

is a purely
business relationship.

Remember?

Ooh! You look glowy.

Exercise bike.

Hey. Uh, actually,
I need a favor.

I hear that Kelly and Donnaare performing at your event,

and I really, really needto get a meeting with them.

Oh, I've only dealt
with their agent;

I suppose I could
give her a call.

Great! Now?

After the hospital.

I have a meeting
at the PT clinic.

In that?

What?

Oh, no, nothing.

Just seems like more of
an athleisure situation,

but hey, what do I know?

[chuckles]
This is last season.

Besides, I'm a Carrington.
Can't show up in sweats.

Why don't you just call me
when you talk to their agent?

'Kay.

[door closes]

CALEB:
Excuse me.

You look great.Thank you.

But I need to talk with you
in private.

Yeah, well, I actually havesomething I want to tell you...

anyway.

What is it?Here.

Is everything okay?

Um...

I can't stop thinkingabout our kiss.

Neither can I.

It was a mistake.

I-- It was a great mistake.

But it was a mistake,nevertheless.

I know.

Maybe it's the
Catholic in me.

How can one kiss...

make me feel
so guilty?

Because we both knowthat it felt like more.

But I, uh...

I took a vow of celibacy.

So we need to stopwhatever's going on here

before it goes any further.

I agree. I took
vows, too.

And I owe it to my
marriage to uphold them.

Which would be easierif I don't go to the gala.

I think that's
a good idea.

Because I decided I should
tell Blake about this.

Well, you have to dowhat's right for you,

and I understand the needto feel absolved.

Just make sureyou're considering

how thiswill make Blake feel.

[sighs] Look, I don't havea medical degree,

but it looks like you'rerecovering quite nicely

for someone who just had

liver surgery.Thankfully.

Or else I wouldn't have been
able to do

half the things we just did.

I think we should repeat
all the things we just did

But... [exhales]
I need to focus on being good.

Trust me. You're
doing plenty good.

That surgery
should have killed me.

But for some reason,
I was spared.

So, this is a chance for me
to do better.

Now I want to pay it back.

Or pay it forward. Point is,
I-I want to pay it.

So... unlike you.

It's like I just had
sex with St. Adam,

which is really
kind of a turn-on.

WOMAN:Dr. Carrington.

Dr. Bailey needs to see you
upstairs immediately.

What about? This?

Oh, she's not a patient.

Something about
stolen medication?



Don't bother denying it,because there were eyewitnesses.

Supplies, meds,
anything else you stole?

Dr. Bailey, eyewitnesses
are notoriously unreliable.

And security cam footage.

Less unreliable.

Do you have anything
to say for yourself?

There's a shelter
down the street.

It was out of supplies...

Stop. That shelter doesn't need
any help, Dr. Carrington.

This is disappointing.

I don't want to have to
recommend to the board

that you be fired, but...Fired?

What about a warning?Warnings

are for things like having sex
in the supply closet.

How many cameras are there
in this place?

I won't take pleasure
in punishing you, Doctor.

Well... at least
not in this way.

So, it'll be sad
to see you go.

Mm-hmm. Right.

You've had it out for me
ever since I turned down

your advances my first week
on the job.

I resent that accusation.

Maybe we can work
something out.

Guess you'll want this, then.

You can keep it until
an official decision is made.

I'll see you tomorrow
night at the gala.

You can plead your case
when you give me a tour

of the manor.

I'm sure it has a lot ofempty rooms and... dark corners.

[door opens]

How'd your meeting go?
Word travels fast.

You sure have a way
of making enemies.

So, how can I help you,
Ms. Carrington?

Actually,
Ican help you, Brooke.

Help you witha big commission.

My fiancé is Kelly and Donna's
number one fan.

So I would like to hire them
to play at my wedding,

as a surprise for him.

Because, you know, what's a
better wedding gift than that?

Probably nothing. But I'm afraidyou need to keep shopping.

Shrewd negotiating.
I like it.

Uh, I will also cover
all travel expenses for them

and their entourage.

And if they don't havean entourage,

which is sad, I'll buy them one.
There you go.

Well, I wish it was only
about money,

especially after seeing this.

But the ladies
don't tour anymore.

They just record.

They're wealthy
and only play events

that are meaningful to them.

I am so sick of meaningful.

I know. But they
love charity.

Elephants, orphans, veterans.

Well, if I told them
how much Ilove charity,

would that maybe
help my chances?It might.

They just played an event
for their sorority,

Lambda Lambda Nu, because

all the proceeds went
to feed the homeless.

Lambda Lambda No Way...

I mean-- Oh, my God,
are you kidding me?

That is mysorority.

Maybe I should give

my sisters a tour

of the revamped
physical therapy clinic

they'll be playing for.

Well, I'm sure that would go
a long way with them.

Fantastic. I'm gonna
leave that right there.

Will you please tell my fellow
Lambda Lambda Nus

how excited I am to meet them?
Yeah.

'Cause you know, there's no bondquite like sisterhood.

I'm not telling them that.

No. No.

Moved.

Ew, no.

Swiping up. New dating app?

I'm actually just trying to findsomeone to go to Taylor Swift

with me tonight,but no one's front row material.

That's the nice thing

about being married.

You have a plus-one
built right in.

Yeah, I guess so.

Well, where's the, uh,
redhead from down under?

She's mad at me.

Actually, do you want to go?

Oh, God, no.

I'm just gonna havea chill dinner here

and then go to bed early.

Totally get it.
Though for someone

that just had liver surgery,
you look great.

Yeah, I feel great.I mean, you know,

if-if you want,
we could get a bite to eat...

Love to. I mean, we-we never
really get to hang out,

and this is the
perfect opportunity

for us to rekindle
our... acquaintance.

JENNINGS: Finally.I've been waiting.

The dance instructor
is gonna be here any minute.

I didn't miss anything?

I wanted to talk to you
before he got here.

I-I apologize,but I had to stop on my way home

to pick up this.

Wow.

Blake, this isn't something
you just "pick up."

Well, nothing is too good
for my wife.

So...

if there's somethingyou want to talk about,

you'll look like a couplemillion bucks doing it.

Hmm?[phone ringing]

I...Wait now, okay?
Hold that thought.

This will just take a minute.
Hopefully.

What's the latest
over there?

[sighs] You're not
the dance instructor.

And you're not Ginger Rogers.
I'm glad we got that straight.

[laughs]:
Ooh.

[gasps]
Nice bling.

I see someone's been putting
her allowance to good use.

It was a present
from your father.

Oh, God. Well, then, I am sorry.

For what?
Having a generous husband?

Right. You have a safe
in your closet filled

with enough diamonds to buy
an island, but my father

just happened to pick up thisseven-figure treat just because.

No. He obviously
did something wrong.

Isn't that kind of a cliché?

Well, so is getting married
three times,

but he nailed that one, too.

You mind if I just...?

Yep, yep, yep,
yep, yep.

That is the "Daddy did somethingvery, very bad" gift.

Mm-hmm. I've seen it
before. Alexis had a few.

Even fake Cristal got one.

He's obviously hiding something.

Anyway, have a great lesson.

BLAKE:
Laura Van Kirk screwed me.

I just found out thatCarrington Atlantic oil tankers

are being held up
in Moldavian shipping lanes.

Held up by what exactly?

The government wants
to nationalize oil,

and get rid of C.A.'s presence
there once and for all.

So the C.A. tankers reloaded
their oil, took off.

But the king won't allow them
outside Moldavian waters?

Exactly, and that's when Lauradecides to sell me the company.

$500 million worth of oil
could be lost.

Well, I'm not just
gonna give it to them.

Clear my schedule.

Fuel up the jet.

We're going
to Moldavia tomorrow.

Where's the instructor?
Let's get this over with.

I sent him home.
We can practice.

[music playing]Though you don't seem to be inthe best frame of mind for that.

Honey, I'm here.
[clears throat]

Can I ask you a question?Mm-hmm.

Why did you buy
me this necklace?

I told you. I haven't beenthe greatest husband

and I want to get yousomething nice.

Is there a problem?

No, it just caught me
by surprise.

It's so extravagant.

Next time I'll surprise you
with a scented candle.



And who were you reading
those contracts with here

yesterday afternoon?

Like I told you,
it was the Van Kirk lawyers.

What is going on here?

[music stops]Why am I getting interrogated
for buying you a necklace

worth more than the
GDP of most countries?

You seemed to like it fine
when I gave it to you.

I did, but then Fallon came in.

Oh, what did my wonderful
daughter have to say?

She said it looked
like an apology gift.Well,

the only thing
I have to apologize for

is being a thoughtful husband.

Blake, you're overreacting.

Oh, am I? I'm sorry.

Would you like
another piece of jewelry?

It won't happen again.
[scoffs]

I'm about to be fired.

How can they fire you? Your lastname's all over that hospital.

That doesn't hold
much sway with Dr. Bailey.

Maybe this'll make you
feel better.

I think this is bigger
than an ice cream sundae.

Cristal saw me

afterwards, she had this
smug smile on her face,

like it had made her day.

She's probably already
told Blake.

Which is ironic,
because she's hardly been

Mother Teresa these days.

"These days"? Something happen?

Uh, nothing.

I probably shouldn't
talk about it.

Oh.

So you just don't trust me.

No, I-I'm trying to rise
above the idle gossip.

Oh.But y...

I'm sure I could tell you.

Um...

I saw Cristal
kiss a priest.

You-you can't say anything.
Promise me?

I promise.Uh, does she know that you saw?

No, and to be honest,

I feel bad for her.

Seeking comfort
in the arms of a priest?

She's got to be
in a lot of pain.

I'm sorry, did you have a livertransplant or a brain rewiring?

Because that doesn't
sound like you.

I know. I'm kind of
surprising myself.

I usually don't gossip,
but Sammy Jo

is really gonna die
when he hears about this.

No-- Kirby, Kirby.
You just promised

you wouldn't say anything.

Good point.

Mm-hmm.But you can't godown to Dr. Bailey

without a fight.

You know, I like
secretly dating a doctor.

Do you have a ball gown?

SAM:
In my opinion,
Kirby needs to get over it.

I mean, I'm the victim here.Are we still on this?

I trusted Ramy,
and I was robbed.

How does that make me
a bad friend?

It sounds like Kirby was
trying to warn you,

and you just didn't listen.

Yeah, yeah,
that's what she said.

Excuse me, sir.Yes, sir?

Um, I would love
another drink, please.

Actually, Sam,

uh, I'm gonna,
I'm-a call it a night.

Now?Yeah.

No, no, no, no.We're having a great time.

No. He'll have another water,please. Thank you.

Okay, but I'm gone
after this one.

My point is, yeah, maybe Ididn't listen, but a bad friend?

A bad friend is someone
who stabs you in the back.

Or someone who lets
you wear lime green

even when it isn't your color.

[chuckles]: Or, well,
apparently, someone who gets

great seats to a concert.

That Kirby has no interest
in going to.

Well, that's her loss.

[phone chimes]

Oh, she texted me.

It's four letters.
What is this, a code?

Something the kids are
texting nowadays?

Mia?

Jeff Colby.

I thought that was you.

Wow, you look...Careful now.

Amazing.

Even better than you did
in college.

That works.

[clears throat]

I, uh, I met Mia duringorientation week, freshman year.

Uh, of all the bars in Atlanta,
you walk into mine.

[laughs]Humblebrag.

I'm Sam. I own a hotel.

Oh. Okay.

I moved to town last week.

I'm here for a friend's
bachelorette.

And I better get back

to bridezilla now, but...

let's catch up?

Yeah. Yeah, I'd like that.



JENNINGS:
His heart rate went from 60

to 155 in the middle
of the afternoon.

How do you know that?Blake and I synced

our exercise apps as a way
to motivate each other.

So I looked at it
and saw the spike

when he was supposedly
reading contracts.

My husband had sex
with Laura Van Kirk

while I-- we were planning
the foundation's event.

It's humiliating.

What we did was wrong,
but different.

Technically, cheating
is cheating...

...but you're right.

It is different.

So, what are you gonna do now?

I don't know.

It can't be a coincidence thatsomething happened between them

the same day
he got C.A. back from her.

What, you thinkthat he slept with her

to get his company back?

Maybe.

I just know he'll do anything
for Carrington Atlantic.

But would he do
anything for you?

FALLON:
And here's

the new wing.

What charitable cause didyour chapter at NYU support?

Uh, oh, what cause
didn't we support?

You know? What cause?

Homeless dogs.

Homeless dogs?

And cats, of course.

[chuckles]

And people, obviously.

[laughs nervously]

Well, that's adorable.

A true sister thinksof everyone, big and small.

Mm.[chuckles]

So our agent said that your
fiancé is a big fan of ours?

Yes, yes, yes. He is
like a teenage girl.

But you know, in the
manliest way possible.

So, what do youthink about us

playing a few songsfor your wedding?

[gasps]
I think I could kiss you.

Listen, you

would be a part of the greatestwedding present ever,

and I would win.

On three.Yeah.

[both laugh]

Oh, it's not just
a normal shake?

No, I don't want that.

She's trying to do the secret
sorority handshake with you.

Donna, leave the
poor girl alone.

WOMAN [over P.A.]:
Code blue, OR One.

Code blue, OR One.Remember?

Yeah. Yeah,
of course I remember.

I just-- I forgot to
tell you guys

I am a full-fledged germophobe,

so don't take that personally.

Oh, of course not.

But we can't wait tohear your speech tomorrow night.

My what?Aren't you speaking

at the galafor the clinic?

That's what the host does.

Tells the story about how
this whole idea started.

It's so empoweringto see young women

leading the way.

We're excited to hear it.

Oh, and I'm excited to give it.

It's gonna be an
unbelievable story.

Remember, I was dating that guy.I couldn't...Look at you two.

Rekindling away.Hey, Sam.

Didn't expect to see you here...again.

Mia and I are catching up.

Oh, nice.

Continue.

It was after college.
Remember?

I was living in that
tiny apartment downtown.

Oh, yeah.
That place was terrible.

But that was where
we finally hooked up.

Hello.

Now I'm interested.

And then she went
and got a job in Philly.

I was ready to try
long distance,

but you said we were too young.

That we owed it to ourselves
not to be tied down.

Mm. Nice line, player.

Oh, well, you know I was right.

And it was funwhile it lasted.

[laughter]

Pretty much two ships
passing in the night.

Yeah, timing never seems
to work out for us.

SAM: Oh, timing
is overrated.

Trust me, I dated
a married guy before and,

well, it didn't work out,
but maybe it will for you.

[chuckles]

You're married?

About five months.

No ring.

I, uh, guess I'm justnot that used to it.

None of us are, really.

Okay, so, uh,

I will see you at
the gala tonight.

[jazz music playing]



[indistinct chatter]

Where's Blake?I guess

he's still getting ready.
He can be a little vain.

Oh, thanks for the news flash.

But I see you are stillwearing the necklace,

which I assume means you talkedand straightened everything out.

Unless you chose to ignore itand just keep the diamonds,

which is totally understandable.

Everything is fine. Okay?

Well, great, because
I have a favor to ask.

I know, I know,two in two days.

But I promise, after this one,

I am willing to call it even,on account of all the lying

you did to me.What is it, Fallon?

Would you mind if I
gave a speech tonight?

Specifically, the keynote.

I know how much trouble it isto host these things,

so I thought I'd help out.

You know, take something
off your plate.

Are you thinking, or...?

This is my event, Fallon.

I have an entire speech writtenthat I will be giving.

But thanks for the offer.

Mm.

Never mind.[sighs]

Scotch, neat.Culhane. Culhane.

You were the presidentof your fraternity, right?

Actually, the treasurer.

Okay, that's a little sad.

But you're my experton Greek life,

so I need your help with

the Lambda Lambda Nu
secret handshake.

It's impossible. You have to bedouble-jointed or something.

I watched the video online,

but they don't show you
the whole shake.

So I'm hoping you canteach me the rest.

Well, I can't help you
because I don't know it.

That's why they call it
a "secret" handshake.

[sighs]Seriously?

All this for a wedding band?

They are not a wedding band.

Liam loves Kelly and Donna.

The only way he'd be happier
is if Starship played for us.

He likes Starship?

I know. It's weird.

But anyway, if I can't get
Kelly and Donna,

then I am back to square one.

So what?
It's just a present.

You really don't understand.

If this fails,
the universe is telling me

that we do not belong together.

Well, at least you're
not overreacting.

Well, I guess we can't all havethe perfect relationship,

like you and Vanessa.

I don't want to talk
about that.

Didn't these women already
agree to play at your wedding?

Sort of, but they won't
if they find out the truth.

Which is why I need to master
that secret handshake

and work on my speech

on how I started this program.

But you didn't start th...

You'll never get away with this.

Where are you going?

Why aren't you dressed?

Honey, there's a crisisin Moldavia

that needs my immediateattention.

A crisis. Really?It's serious.

I'm leaving now.

Oh. And are you going alone?

No. Anders is going with me.

What am I supposed
to tell people?

No one will even notice
that I'm gone.

Trust me, all eyes are
gonna be on you.

What about our dance?

Oh, honey,

you're the love of my life.

My company's in trouble.

If I stay and do nothing,
it'll be fatal.

Our marriage is in trouble.

But apparently that's a risk
you're willing to take.

I don't have a choice.
This is my legacy.

I'll be back as soon as I can
and I will make it up to you.

No, thanks.

Dr. Bailey, you strike me
as a chardonnay drinker.

Brassy, bold.

Knows what she likes.

Well, I do know what I like,
and you clean up well.

Thank you.

I was hoping that
we could revisit

the discipline that you're

bringing against me
to the board.

You mean the disciplinethat you brought on yourself

by stealing?Right.

It was for a worthy cause.

If I could just
explain myself...

Save it. It's not aboutwhy you did it.

It's about what you did,and now,

it's about who you need.

I'm open to working outan alternative punishment.

I have a soft spot forpale men in tuxedos.

You're an incredibly
beautiful woman,

and, um, I'm very tempted.

But I'm not gonna give in
to temptation tonight.

Wow, nice dress.

Back in my closet
before midnight, Cinderella.

Hello, everybody.

My name is Fallon Carrington,

cofounder of
the Carrington Foundation.

Thank you.[cheers and applause]

Thank you.

Now, as much as I would love

to stand up here and give
this speech all by myself,

which I totally could,

it is time for me
to introduce you

to our other keynote speaker

so we could tell you
how excited we are

about this project.

So, without further ado,
Cristal, come on up here.

[cheers and applause]

Cristal?

I guess Cristal's
in the ladies' room.

Luckily, I have written
some words of my own.

We saw a need in our community
and answered the call.

The new physical therapy clinic

will provide hope
and relief for veterans.

It will be a refuge for them,

and hopefully
an inspiration to everyone.

[cheers and applause]

And that is all any of us
can hope to be.

When I first mentioned
this idea to my husband--

to-- to my father,my father,[murmuring]

he told me that, as a couple...of Carringtons... [chuckles]

philanthropy is not a choice,

but a way of life,
and he is so right.

That's one of the things that
made me fall in love with him.

And by "him,"
I mean this project.

So, you know what,
that's enough about me.

Now, I think you would rather
hear from the people

you came here to see
in the first place.

So without further ado, Kelly
and Donna, get on up here.

[chuckles][cheers and applause]

Uh, before Kelly and I
do a set,

we always sing the
Lambda Lambda Nu chantAlways.

for good luck.

And tonight,
we are lucky enough

to have a fellow sister
with us to do that.

Do you mind?

We're gonna post it
to our social

so every chapter can see it.You know what, though,

I'm much more comfortablewith the handshake,

Y-You'll be fine.
Ready? On three. One...

Two, three.

♪ Who, who, who are we?

♪ We're the best sorority

♪ Prettier girls, shinier hair

♪ All our sisters walk on air

♪ Who, who, who are we?

♪ We're the best sorority

♪ We've got style
through and through. ♪

Who? Who?

Good job, you guys.
Kelly and Donna. Wow.

That was so good![microphone feedback]

Okay...You're not one of us.

No, I'm not. I'm not.

I'm sorry.But I cannot tell a lie.

At least not twice.What kind of person

lies about beinga Lambda Lambda Nu?

Well, the type of person
who was trying to impress you

so that you would hopefully
play at my wedding.

But you know what?But all the charity stuff,

that was totally real.

Fallon, did you just
read my speech

and pretend you started
this project yourself?

[people gasping]

We are so not playing
your wedding.

No! Not even "Lovelorn"?But that's Liam's favorite song.

"Lovelorn" is not evenour song.

That's the Kelly Sisters.

Are you sure?

I'm gonna go. I'm gonna...

How-how was that
for an opening act?

Um, uh, Kelly and I
will be right back

with a killer, uh, performance.

Um, just working out
some technical difficulties.

[people murmuring]

I didn't realize
you'd actually be here

when I said,
"See you at the gala."

Wouldn't miss that car crash
we just saw.

This hospital saved my life.

Plus, I deeply enjoy
showing up at these events

because it drives Blake insane.

[chuckles]Not that I've seen
the bastard.

I owe you an apology.

I should have realizedyou wanted to be alone

with Mia today,

but I guess I was
feeling lonely.

Apology accepted.

And that apology goes
for last night, too.

You wanted to go home, and I
just kept talking about Kirby,

who has been avoiding me
all night.

Up until 30 seconds ago,
so was I.

Okay, okay, I-I get it.

I need to listen more.
Read the room better.

Don't tell me, tell Kirby.

I will. I'll just have to
beg her forgiveness.

Turns out galas aren't reallythat much fun when you're alone.

Speaking of which,
where's your other half?

I'll be straight with you.
Uh, my marriage is a...

complicated arrangement.

Isn't everything with Alexis?[sighs]

Seeing Mia last night
made me realize

that part of the reason
I married Alexis

is because I thought
I was dying.

And now that I know
I'm not dying...

You want to be with Mia.

I don't know.

But I do know I regret

letting my friendship with her
fall apart.

Dr. Bailey is much sexier
than I was expecting.

She's still goingto the board.

I did everything I couldto convince her,

but once her mind's made up,there's nothing I can do.

So you'll work at
another hospital.

I don't know. Maybe I'm notmeant to be a doctor.

Of course you are.

Look, why don't
we go play darts?

We can pretend that the
board is Dr. Bailey's head.

I'd really ratherjust go home.

I'll get our coats.I'll meet you out front?

Thank you for coming.Have a good night.

Great gala, Cristal.

I'm glad someone had fun.

I didn't. And it seemslike it was a disaster,

but that's not whatI want to talk about.I don't have time for this.

Oh, good, then
I'll make it quick.

I know you're in favor
of Adam getting fired,

but you're gonna use yourconnections, talk to Dr. Bailey,

make sure that doesn't happen.

And why would I do that?

He's paying the price
for his actions.

Huh. I'm just curious,
what's the price to pay

for someone who commits adulterywith a priest?

So glad we understand
each other.

Not sure if "entertaining"is the right word,

because it was alsoembarrassing.

For me. I was,I was embarrassed for you.

Right. Is this
your attempt at helping?

Not at all.

But I know where
your brain is going.

And the only thing
that tonight proves

is that you would make
a terrible sorority sister.

It also proves that I knownothing about Liam.

Not even his favorite band.

[sighs]

Do you think this weddingis a huge mistake?

This wasn't about
making Liam happy.

This was about making you happy.

No. If that were true,
I would've bought

a silk Valentino jumpsuit.

This was for Liam, you know?

For him to realize
how much I love him.

That shouldn't require
all this hoop-jumping.

Not everything needs to be
such a huge production.

Yeah, but that's what I do.

You know,
big, dramatic statements

that are unforgettableand put everyone else to shame.

And don't forget how touched
you were by Liam's gift,

and that was just
a piece of paper.

Well, I'm assuming
that wasn't the whole gift.

As long as Liam knows
you love him,

that's all that really matters.

Hey, Cristal,I-I'm so sorry about the whole

stealing your speech thing, butyou were nowhere to be found.

It's fine.That's the least of my problems.

What is going on?

Either Kelly or Donna atetoo many shrimp and is now sick.

But since they're a duo,
one won't sing solo.

And if there's
no performance,

then people won't have
a good time, and if people

don't have a good time,
then they won't donate money

and this whole night will
have been for nothing.

And you took offyour necklace.

Yeah. You were right about it.

Well, I owe you a favor.

So let me see what I can do.

DONNA:
I'm sorry,

but Kelly doesn't feel up
to performing tonight.

I hate to let everyone down,
but I can't sing a duet

without the other half
of my duo.

[quietly]: Hey. Lucky for you,I can carry a tune pretty well.

People came to this gala
to see me perform with Kelly.

Not some lunatic

who pretendsto be someone she's not.

But people will be pretty upsetwhen they find out that Donna

is short for prima donna

and that you refused
to perform for a charity

because your partner
OD'd on hors d'oeuvres.

I also have a healthy
online following.

Do you know
any of our actual songs?

Uh, why don't we justgo with a classic?

You know, just in case.

DONNA:
Uh, ladies and gentlemen,

Fallon Carrington has agreed

to sing with me tonight.[cheers and applause]

And now it's time
for our gracious hosts,

Blake and Cristal Carrington,

to take the dance floor.♪

♪ Is love so fragile

♪ And the heart so hollow

♪ Shatter with words

♪ Impossible to follow

♪ You're saying I'm fragile

♪ I try not to be

♪ I search only
for something I can see ♪

♪ I have my whole life

♪ And I am stronger
than you know... ♪

What are you doing here?

Well, I couldn't
stop thinking about

that lobster toast with the
avocado and the fancy peppers.

Yeah, I remember.
They were delicious.

So delicious.

I couldn't stay away.

From the lobster toast?

♪ I need you to love me...

[quietly]:
From you.

♪ Lovers forever

♪ Face-to-face

♪ My city, your mountains

♪ Stay with me, stay

♪ I need you to love me

♪ I need you today

♪ Give me your leather

♪ Take from me my lace

♪ Take from me
my lace ♪

♪ Take from me

♪ My lace.

Thanks again for stepping in.

You sounded great.

Aw, well, it was
for a good cause.

And you know,us Lambda Lambda Nus have to...

Sorry.

Habit.

So I was thinking...Mm?

I can talk to Kelly,

see if she's upfor playing your wedding,

since you filled in for her.

Oh, well, you know
what? Since you guys

weren't even the right
band, I'm actually good.

But do you happen to
know the Kelly Sisters?

Tell me that there's
some relation, or...?

You guys all
hang out?

I guess not.

Only you could completely
humiliate yourself

and still end up
winning the night.

Well, like any skill,

it only gets stronger
the more you practice.

You know, maybe
if you used

that skill for good, you might
know what to do for Liam.

No, I do, I do. Thanks to you.

I have decided I am going
to write Liam a song

and perform it at the wedding.

He will bea puddle at the end.

Kind of like when John Legendwrote "All of Me"

for Chrissy Teigen.

Yeah.

Maybe I should just getJohn Legend to write it.

No, no, you're right.I'll write it myself.

So thank you.Of course.

Now I need a
favor from you.

Dominique and Vanessa have beenusing me as a pawn for ratings.

They faked a fight so Vanessa
could look like she was

on team Culhane.

Now I need to strike back.

And there's only one name
that comes to mind

when I think of revenge.

Fallon? Aw!

I'm flattered.
Thank you, Culhane.

Now, the first thing

you need to know about
revenge is that sometimes

you got to play the long game.

[knocking on door]

I finally figured out
what your text meant.

What text?

This one. "I-M-U-B."

"I miss you, buddy."

That was an accidental text.

IMUB doesn't
mean anything.

You're reading into something
that literally means nothing.

Oh, well, it meanssomething to me.

Because IMU... B.

We haven't talkedin two days,

which is, like,forever in us time.

And I don't want to lose you.

So I am just gonna relax

while we rekindle
our friendship.

What are you wearing?

An itchy polyester blend T-shirtof a band I don't even know.

That's how much I love you.

And we should watch the concert.

It's livestreaming
from Australia.

I know.

That's why I'm here,
not in Adam's loft.

Also, he's in a bad mood.

Thanks for this.

IMUB, too.

I promise I'll be
a better listener.

Okay.

You better start now, because
I have some very juicy gossip.

What did we do?

You broke your
vows, I broke mine.

You said our kiss
was a mistake.

Yeah, well, we make mistakes.

We're only human.

[phone vibrating]



[phone vibrating]

Hmm. Hello?

Want to come over?

[whispers]:It's Adam.

Booty call.

[scoffs]Here.

Um, I can't.I'm watching a concert.

Watch it later.I'm in the mood for celebrating.

Bailey left a message.
She changed her mind.

See? I focused on being good,
and it paid off.

Sometimes karma isn't a bitch.

Wow, I'm so happy for you.

Maybe someonein a more forgiving mood

heard about your little problemand had a chat with her.

Anyway, I, um,

I can't come over right now,

'cause I'm gonna spendsome time with my friend.

Aw.

Um, but if you stay uplate enough,

Sam usually falls asleeparound midnight.

[phone vibrating]

Hello?

Um...

[door opens]

Cristal.Adam, what are you doing here?

Blake's pilot just called.

He and Anders had some trouble
with the government

at the Moldavian airport,
and apparently,

they've been kidnapped.

What?

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