Dynasty (2017–…): Season 3, Episode 13 - You See Most Things in Terms of Black & White - full transcript

- Previously on Dynasty...
- Is this a bad idea?

I'm in the mood for a bad idea.

_

_

_

Fletcher is married.

He was lying to me the
whole time we dated.

What the hell are you doing here?

Didn't Blake tell you?

I'm moving in, dear.

What the hell is this?



Why are we having swamp
water for breakfast?

And why don't I smell crepes?

Because you're smelling

wellness!

Good morning, roomies.

I thought a heart-healthy

meal would be better for all of us.

Okay, I'd like to discuss
some house rules,

since I wasn't exactly
consulted before your arrival.

The deal we made for her getting me

access to Jeff's office was one year,

nonnegotiable,
but we will hardly see her,

because she also agreed to
lay low in the east wing.

Isn't that right, Dominique?
And I'll be sure



to add an addendum
that you are no longer

allowed to speak to the kitchen staff.

Hmm. Oh!

Excuse me,
I have a very important meeting.

See? It's almost like I wasn't here.

"Almost."

Wow.

30 seconds in and I
already want to kill her.

I don't know if I can make it a year.

You are underestimating
how remarkable you are.

If you could move past

all that Alexis crap like you did,

Dominique will be a walk in the park.

I don't like walking in
the park with a snake.

I...

I have to take this.

I'll be right back.

Gunnerson!

Bring me some bacon!

Liam, you and I have

endured and overcome

so many insane obstacles.

And by insane, I mean your mother.

But I have never been more sure

that I am ready to spend
the rest of my life

by your side and in your arms.

So, Liam...

will you marry me?

Yes, Liam will marry you.

And if he doesn't, I will.

I mean, look at this ring.

Aw, I am touched by your materialism.

But I would lose the one
knee thing if I were you.

It feels dated.

What? No, no, there's no time to tinker.

I am doing this at dinner tonight.

Liam. Liam! Liam! Get rid of it.

My mouth? Okay.

What's better than a good sweat?

Uh... aw, man.

I can't think of anything better.

I actually haven't
had a good sweat in ages.

Hey, Siri, remind me to sweat later.

- Good call.
- Yeah.

You two seem weird.

Weird? No...

Excited, yes.

- Yeah.
- Yeah.

- About the hotel.
- It's, um...

Sold out!

- It's sold out for the...
- For the night.

...rest of the time.

So, are we still on for tonight?

Yes, we are, um,
but do you think you could possibly,

I don't know, wash off the sweat

- before then?
- Why?

Why, you don't like this?

No? Little bit?

Okay.

Whew! Okay, bye.

No! Hey.

Fine.

- Is that good?
- It's a little more aggressive than I'm used to.

But I like it.

- Hello, Mother.
- Shouldn't you knock before walking in

on your mother with your stepfather?

- Lesson learned.
- Still, what a pleasant surprise.

Are you here for just a visit?

- I doubt it.
- Are you hungry?

Definitely not hungry, but, um...

I do need some help.

Oh, well,
hold on while I look surprised.

- What do you need?
- So, my license

with the state medical
board is up for review,

as it is every six months.

And Blake was making these...

"donations"

to keep it legit.

By "donations," you mean "bribes"?

Semantics, but now that I've
fallen out of favor with Father,

those have stopped, so I...

I need some money

or I won't be able to practice
as a doctor in Atlanta.

Well, sounds like a big win
for the patients of Atlanta.

How much are we talking?

Not a lot, like...

100,000... I'd...
I'd really appreciate it.

Fine, I'll do it.

- Really?
- No, not really.

You poisoned me,
so let me amend my response to

hell no.

Not a penny, son.

Being a parent's kind of fun.

Enjoy.

I call it House of Deveraux.

A fabulous, sexy reality show
featuring myself, naturally,

and my rising star daughter,

Vanessa, all shot in my new home,

Carrington Manor.

It's very, um,

Kardashian/Jenner-like.

But with singing.

And me.

Hmm, I'm thinking about it...

but I'm not liking it.

You produce a lot
of these shows, Stacey.

This will be huge.

You know who's gonna tune in to see you

and your unknown daughter?

No one.

Now, maybe

Blake Carrington could be a hot name

coming off of his murder trial.

And people seem to be very interested

in his stunning new bride.

Unfortunately,
Cristal and I aren't exactly besties.

Well, neither are the housewives.

But they are juicy and salacious.

Show me a sizzle reel.

A side to Cristal Carrington
no one knows about.

I get it.

So, when Fletcher gets here,
I'm gonna throw one of these

drinks in his face for not
telling me he was married.

Why hasn't Adam texted me yet?

This one will sting more.

This one will stain more.

And that one just tastes nasty.

So, what do you think?

We had amazing sex.

- What's this guy's deal?
- I could salt the rim

of this mojito for more bite.

Kirby?

Focus.

Wait, I'm sorry,
you invited Fletcher here

to throw a drink in his face?

You're not really the
drink-throwing type.

I know.

Hi... Sam.

- Fletcher.
- Just let me explain.

Yes. I'm married.

But we have an open marriage

and my husband knows everything.

There was no cheating.

I just didn't

know how to tell you,
because some people

have a problem with it.

Well, I didn't see that coming.

Kirby?

Don't you have somewhere to be?

Oh, no, not really.

Look, I can't stay anyway.

I just wanted to tell
you the truth in person.

And to ask if you're

still interested in seeing each other?

That seems like a good idea.

Great, I... I'll call you later.

Okay.

- Bye.
- Bye.

Bye, Fletcher!

That's a terrible idea.

Oh, says the genius who
slept with Adam Carrington?

Okay, Liam will be here

any minute... when he gets here,

he will sit down,
tell me how great I look

and order a drink. At that point,

I will propose, he will say yes,

and on my cue, you will start playing.

- Mm-hmm.
- Okay? You got that?

Yes?

Okay, okay, he's here.
Go hide.

- Okay.
- Go hide faster!

Hey, look at you

all clean and sweat-free.

Really? 'Cause I'm kind of freakin' out.

Oh, no, don't. You smell great.

What? No. No, no, no.

But I just got huge news.

- Mm-hmm.
- I have an opportunity to pitch a book idea

to one of the most important
publishers in the world.

Wow! Wow, that is great news.

And I can't wait to talk
about it in 15 minutes.

- Could we just get you a drink?
- Yeah, that's the problem.

The publisher's in London,
so I have to fly out tomorrow.

So, what's the problem?

I need a rain check on tonight,

'cause I have so much to do.

I need to pack,
flesh out my idea, write notes.

And this has to happen tomorrow?

I know it's sudden,
but they're insisting.

It's an opportunity
that I can't pass up.

Okay, it's fine. Whatever. Go.

Oh, also, I'd...

love to borrow the jet.

So, do you think
you could set that up for me

while I get ready?
You should come with me.

No, no. That's fine.

I will just... wait until you get back.

- Wait?
- Oh, to...

- congratulate you, silly.
- Okay, well,

- I got to run, so...
- Mm-hmm.

- Think on it?
- Okay, I will.

Not the gesture.

I mean, the obvious move is
to wait for Liam to get back

and then propose to him then.

Because it has to be perfect. Right?

Totally. So, for my date with Fletcher,

I'm thinking of wearing
this kind of an...

"Open marriage? Who cares?" vibe.

But there's also this...

"I'm obviously hotter
than your husband" deal.

I'm legit torn. Can you help me?

Maybe I'm putting too
much pressure on myself.

It doesn't have to be a perfect

storybook proposal, you know?

Every time I go for a fairy tale,

it ends up being a disaster.

I mean, we're like Hansel and Gretel,

except if the witch actually
ate them in the end,

and then got food poisoning.

Okay, I think you should
totally go to London with him.

I mean, he clearly wants you to,

and it's not like you have
anything else to do here.

Interesting.

I guess I could go with him
and find the perfect moment to propose.

I could take him to my
favorite chocolate shop

in the world and propose to him there.

Chocolate shop?
Who are you, Willy Wonka?

I could even propose on the plane.

That's interesting.

Okay, so, um...

which outfit?

For what? Where are you going?

You are seriously the worst friend.

Oh, please.

Last night you wanted to marry me.

Top from A, bottom from B,
and we're gonna need an option C

- for the shoes.
- Really?

Anders.

I've been looking everywhere for you.

You found me. Well done.

Now, if you don't mind...

I do mind.
I need some advice on Cristal.

How can I befriend her,
get her to really open up to me?

I'm not sure that's possible.

Also, I would consider helping you...

but I don't trust you.

No need to trust.

I just want to be friends
with my sister-in-law.

So let's say I wanted to arrange

a special dinner for her.

What would that look like?

Does she have a strong
feeling about kale?

Mrs. Carrington's feelings about kale

are hers and hers alone.

Classic Anders.

You're like a field general...

unflappable in battle

and always the smartest man in the room.

That's why I've had a secret
crush on you for years.

I was unaware.

Well, now you know... General.

At ease, Soldier.

If you do want to have this dinner,

Mrs. Carrington has an
affinity for roasted pork.

May I please go about my business now?

Of course.

Whoa!

We're going for one night.

Hey, you never know what could happen.

We could have a reason to
celebrate and stay longer.

Celebrate?

Oh. You know,
if they buy your book idea.

Are you okay?

I've just never seen you be
so giddy about my career.

Even when you were my publisher.

But it feels nice to be supported.

No. Well, I am always supportive.

Sometimes it's just a
little less obvious.

But I think this trip is gonna be

a memorable one for both of us.

Let's go to London.

I got three local affiliates

to cover the event, plus HGTV.

And then I hit a nun with a taxi.

What?

Is everything okay?

No.

I can't stop thinking of your husband.

Hey, look, I assure you my
husband is not thinking of you.

No offense.
And the open marriage was his idea.

But I'm-I'm... fine with it.

Are you positive?

I am. Yeah, it works.

Can you tell me what time it is?

Aren't you wearing a watch?

I'd rather hear you say it.

What is this?

Oh.

Wow.

This is beautiful.

Thank you.

For everything.

Dominique?

Welcome home, Cristal.

Okay, that's a little creepy.

I just wanted to document tonight.

I thought you might be
hungry from your long trip,

so I catered in a small feast for us.

It's from the best
barbecue joint in Atlanta.

We have pork ribs and pulled
pork and smoked sausages

and even... pigs in a blanket for fun.

What the hell is going on here?

I want us to spend time together.

And after dessert, I brought in
the dream team of beauticians.

We can get manis and pedis and waxing

together, just like sisters.

This is all insane.

- Plus, I'm allergic to pork.
- What?

I need to get out of here.
I have to go lie down.

How about on those massage tables?

We could get a couples massage and chat?

So this is nice, right?

I... would like to make a toast

to you... Liam.

Actually, hold that thought,
save the toast.

- I got a better idea.
- I'm pretty sure you don't.

No, this is perfect.

I need to practice my pitch.

All right, this project could be

life-changing for me, and I...
I need to nail it in the room.

- Mm-hmm.
- And since we're gonna be here for a while, I mean,

why not do it now, right?

It's so perfect.

Okay, so any feedback
is appreciated... characters,

plot, anything.

- I'm starting to wish I was in coach.
- Okay. Yeah. Sorry.

I'll start.

It started on a day like any other.

I was tying up loose ends
on a nasty espionage case

when a rich nightclub
owner showed himself in

like he owned the place.

They say you're a pretty good
private detective, Leland.

Some say I'm the best, pal.

Some say you were the best.

Well, some say...
Okay, we could do this all day.

- Get to the point.
- There was a jewelry heist at my nightclub.

Since I'd rather not
have the cops involved,

I want you on the case.

I know you and your nightclub,
Mr. Sanders.

I'm not interested in the case.

A P.I. turning down a case?
Not something you see every day.

Yeah, well, I got my reasons.

There's not a damn thing you
can do to change my mind.

We'll see about that.

Blaine, get in here!

Tout de suite!

Sorry, sir.

I didn't hear you at first.

- Get a hearing aid.
- Yeah.

Please change the gentleman's mind.

Oh, yeah. Uh...

Where's your mind at now, Leland?

Nice plate of greens is
good for a man's diet.

I'm on the case.

That Peach Diamond is priceless.
It's my baby.

I want you to nab the thief
and return Kirby to me.

It's what I call the diamond.

Oh.

So you put the diamond

in the safe in your office.

And then the power goes out.

I'll bet my last buffalo nickel

it was the new busboy,
Aidan, that stole it.

He's more suspicious
than a three-legged cat,

and he skipped town
right after the robbery.

Well, it's always an inside job.

Except when it isn't.

How much is your fee again?

I'll ask the questions, Sanders.

Such as, why'd you keep such a hot rock

in your club instead of your home safe?

I don't trust anybody there, either.

Right.

Ladies and gentlemen,
welcome to the fabulous Club Sanders.

Magic is in the air every night here,

but tonight, my friends,
the magic is real.

So I'm gonna need you
beautiful people to show

some deep love to the extravagant,

the exquisite, the vivacious

Miss Veronica Cabot.

♪ I'm sentimental ♪

♪ So I walk in the rain ♪

♪ I've got some habits... ♪

I only had one reason
for not taking the case,

but it was a doozy.

Veronica, the one I gave my heart to,

only to have her chew it up,
spit it out,

kick it to the curb and drive over it

with a steamroller... twice.

♪ Try to change me now? ♪

♪ So let people wonder ♪

♪ Let 'em laugh ♪

♪ Let 'em frown ♪

♪ You know I'll love you ♪

♪ Till the moon's upside down ♪

♪ Don't you remember ♪

♪ I was always your clown ♪

♪ Why try to change me ♪

♪ Why would you want to change me? ♪

Every drop of blood in my veins told me

to bolt out of there
and never look back,

but my eyes wouldn't let me leave,

and my heart started
ripping through my shirt.

So, how do you like it so far?

Well, I have to be honest.
It was a little meh at first.

But then, the lounge singer came in,

and it got much more exciting.

Okay, just wait.

Mm-hmm. Hmm.

I knew I had to
interview everyone in the joint,

so I stopped staring
and started talking.

Sure I was drinking here that night,

but I have no alibi,

because I come and go a lot.

No one ever recognizes my face.

Been slinging cocktails here forever.

I'd never steal from my boss, Sanders.

He's always been so good to me,

especially when I've been so bad.

I see everything from up here on stage.

So you want to know who I saw
slinking around that night

the lights went out in Georgia?

No one, 'cause it was pitch black.

You're never gonna find that diamond.

Where was I at the time?

Easy. I was, uh, moving the boss's car.

Filling it with gas.

Hmm.

Happy to see you, Leland.

I know you'll dig for the truth

and prove the busboy didn't do it.

Because Aidan's my brother,

and he's being framed
like a Monet... or a Manet.

I didn't know you had a brother,

Veronica,
or such a sweeping knowledge of art.

I'd like to chat with Aidan.

Well, of course you would,
but you can't.

You see, he's hiding out until
the real thief is caught.

It's too hot for him here.

You're looking good.

For whatever it's worth.

The last time you told me I was
looking good was two seconds

before you slammed the door on my grill.

But I'm still gonna crack this case.

But for now, maybe we keep our distance.

Why is he being so rude to her?

I mean, it's clear
that the singer is the hero,

and the P.I. should be
treating her like one.

Okay, so you're invested in the story.

Mm-mm. Uh...

Just keep going.

So, tell me, Lexi.

No one remembers seeing
you at your husband's club

the night the Peach Diamond was poached.

Believe me, darling.

If I had been there,
they'd all remember seeing me.

This is a face you don't forget.

Right.

So, where were you that night?

I was in bed, of course.

I can take you upstairs if
you'd like to... touch it.

I'm a little chilly right now.

Well, if you want to get toasty...

...why don't you take a
step closer to the fire?

I don't do well with fire, mister.

But I'm really good at
conducting body heat.

I didn't have time for hanky-panky.

I don't have time for hanky-panky.

Sal! Little Joe!

Get this bum out of here.

No need, ma'am.
This bum will show himself out.

But the next time you get cold?

Try a light sweater.

Hey. Why don't we take a stroll, pal.

Maybe have a little chat.

- Easy. I bruise like a baby peach.
- Aw.

Then I'm thinking you don't show
your face around here no more.

Yeah, and I'm wondering
what else you two gentlemen

do around here besides
rough up innocent P.I.s.

Actually, I handle accommodations.

So if you ever need a place to stay,

I can give you my card.

And I, uh,
deal with Mr. Sanders' vehicles.

See, cars are kind of my thing.

Well, something's puzzling me because...

No, don't!

Relax.

Just gonna water these petunias.

Okay. That's not what I thought

- you were gonna say about that.
- Hey, pal.

I trust my beak,

and something about you
doesn't smell right.

- I didn't lay a hand on the boss's jewels.
- Maybe not,

but you laid them all
over the boss's wife,

- didn't you?
- What?

That meathead Little Joe says he
runs the show on Sanders' cars.

So one plus two means you lied

to me about where you
were the other night.

You weren't at a gas station.

Yeah. And how'd you know

I was banging the boss's wife?

I didn't until you just said it.

Guess I got a little lucky there, huh?

Eh, not as lucky as me.

You've seen Lexi. She's a knockout.

I can't imagine being married to her,
but hell of a sidepiece, right?

Wait.

- What?
- I'm just trying to add some flavor.

I am starting to get confused,
which is not the ideal flavor

you want to leave your audience with.
Can you just

tell me who stole the Peach Diamond

so that this can be over
and I can tell you my story?

My story with the happiest ending ever

where everything makes sense?

Sounds amazing. But not yet.

Because things are about
to get crazy in mine.

The last time something

this hot was in my office was when

my portable wok exploded.

Funny me, thinking the lock
on my door keeps people out.

Well, my key's still good,

so I let myself in.

If I come up with any more questions

about the case, I'll knock on your door.

But now, feel free to use that one.

Oh,

I'm not here to talk
about the case, Leland.

But it doesn't take a detective to know

that you got tossed
around like a rag doll.

Sometimes I wish I had amnesia
so I could forget you existed.

Tell me, Detective.

Do you remember... this?

That top lip rings a bell.

Try the bottom. They're twins.

Leland. It's me, Blaine.

I just remembered something,
something big.

I need to talk to you tonight.

You know what?

I just realized that I've
forgotten a few details

about you.

How'd you like to jog my memories?

Whoa, hey, there.

I think the story is in great shape.

I'm totally feeling the characters.

But what I want to be
feeling is the author.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

- What?
- No, no, we can't have sex yet.

We're almost in London,
and I need to finish telling the story.

Fine. Just keep it sexy,

pick up the pace and skip to the end.

♪ The night is bitter ♪

♪ The stars have lost their glitter ♪

♪ The winds grow colder ♪

♪ Suddenly you're older ♪

♪ And all because of the man ♪

♪ That got away... ♪

There were some strange
patrons in the club that night.

But I was there to get
dirt out of Blaine,

not to hassle

some daffy mother out for a
few stiff ones with the kid.

♪ The writing's on the wall ♪

♪ The dreams you dreamed ♪

♪ Have all ♪

♪ Gone astray ♪

♪ The man that won you... ♪

You said you got big news.

Well, I haven't seen the papers today,

and I got a hankering for the headlines.

♪ Has seen its final inning ♪

♪ Don't know what happened... ♪

He was deader than Friendster.

Either poisoned or a heart attack.

Lousy night either way.

Except now I knew who did it.

I am locking it down, people!

- Nobody leaves.
- Uh, should I keep singing?

Nobody sings.

There was a serious crime here,
and I know who did it.

The diamond heist?

Or the murder?

The murder seems bigger.

Oh, please. People get murdered
left and right around here.

I was hired to catch a thief,
and that's what I'm gonna do.

It was the busboy, Aidan.

That's a lie!

He's gone, and he's never coming back.

Or did he come back
to tie up loose ends?

What, you don't see him?

Maybe he's the invisible man.

Or woman.

- No!
- The baby!

It was a doll?

Poison! I'd bet five bucks on it.

Five whole bucks?

Get your mitts off me.
I did nothing, you hear?

We're gonna take you in. But first,

- we're gonna take you out.
- Got to make sure justice gets served.

Oh! I'll never let them

strap you to that mean,
old electric chair.

Not my brother.

She was gone.

For good.

Wait. Wait, no.

Smart move taking a plane, Veronica.

Sure, a bus is cheaper.

A train's more clickety-clack romantic,

but they don't make you
disappear like that.

What are you doing here, Leland?

You picking your mom up?

Well, hopefully,

you'll get lucky,
and her plane'll crash.

First you manipulated your brother

to steal the Peach Diamond for you.

Then you manipulated Sanders to hire me,

intending the trail to
lead right to Aidan.

You're even crazier than
shorts with high heels.

You had to have Blaine killed
when he learned the truth,

which is why you told
Aidan to come back.

But why would your
brother ax Blaine for you?

Simple.

He's not your brother.

He's your lover!

That bastard. Did he tell you that?

He didn't have to.
I saw the look on his face

when you gave him the ole
"see you later."

I'd recognize that look anywhere.

It's the look I saw on my face

when you gave me the ole
"see you later."

Well, that makes no sense.
You can't see your own face.

I'm assuming that's how I looked, okay?

The point is, like Aidan,

I would've killed for you
at one point, too.

You think you know everything,
but you know nothing.

The only thing I don't know

is what you did with the Peach Diamond.

Wouldn't happen to be
in that handbag, would it?

I caught you red-handed.

Peach-handed.

You got to listen to me, Leland.

I can change.

And that rock's worth millions.

Let's run away together.

Me and you, baby, till the end of time.

I was torn.

I wanted to believe her,
but she'd lied to me

over and over again.

So many times.

Repeatedly.

You're a bigger fool than Aidan.

And he's a big fool.

Huge.

Goodbye, Leland.

I'll see you in hell.

I removed the bullets, Veronica.

So who's the huge fool now?

Rhetorical question implying
you're the huge fool.

No. No!

It wasn't the ending I chose

but the one that chose me.

Unlucky.

Well, look at that.

Your pitch lasted the entire flight.

So? What'd you think?

Uh, yeah, I thought it was...
it was good.

Good? That's it?

Fallon, my pitch is in an hour.

Okay, well, tiny thought.

Maybe postpone it a few weeks

or, I don't know, a year.

Why?

Well, honestly,

it didn't make sense in a lot of places.

Okay, like where?

Like everywhere.

I mean, how did the P.I.
suddenly figure everything out?

Why was Aidan in a dress?

And were Sal and Little Joe cops,

or were they security guards?

- I don't know. It was all very confusing.
- Well, I don't agree.

Oh, and another thing?

You made Veronica way too manipulative.

You know what? The story's solid.

- I just think you didn't understand it.
- Excuse me?

It's a complex story. Maybe
you just weren't able to follow it.

Well, I'm following that you're
calling me dumb right now.

Not dumb.
Just an unsophisticated reader.

Look, you can't be great
at everything. It's fine.

You know what?
Go pitch your stupid story,

but do not come crying to me
when they "chew it up

and spit it out. Twice."

Fletcher's married, Sam.
How could he possibly be serious

about you,
the person he's not married to?

Well, my, uh, new,
insanely beautiful watch

says pretty serious to me.

Mm. "I can't give you my undivided love,

so I'll give you a sparkly timepiece."

Can you please just be supportive?

I really care about him,

and I'm pretty sure that the
whole open marriage situation

won't last long,

which means that the marriage
won't, either.

Fletcher's probably...

totally gonna leave his husband.

He said this?

Or is this just what
you're hoping will happen?

Kirby,

I think I'm falling in love with him.

And I think he's falling in love
with me, too.

Congratulations.

You fooled the hell out of me

with that whole
"Cristal loves pork" thing.

Oh. Must have slipped my
mind that she's allergic.

I should've known better than
to try to get info on Cristal

from such a loyal man.

Is there something I can help you with?

Have Mrs. Gunnerson
prepare you a sandwich?

Do I look like the type of
person who would eat a sandwich?

No, I'm going upstairs to
take Cristal some champagne.

Nothing says bonding better
than Cristal and Dom.

Clever.

I'll see you in 20.

Well, I guess I'll see you in 21.

I'm sorry, Adam.

I did everything I could to
get Jeff to give you the money.

It's fine.

I hated the idea of owing
him anything anyway, so...

The great news is Jeff
and I have a plan.

And once it goes perfectly,

I will have more than enough money

to buy you a license
in Georgia, Montana.

Hell, I'll buy you a license
in all 50 states.

That's very sweet, Mother.

But that sounds like it'll take time.

My plan is ready to go.

- Do tell.
- So,

I'm gonna sell the
vineyard I bought for Blake

and use that money to pay off whomever

to get my medical license back.

Isn't the vineyard Blake's?

But the deed's in my name.

We never changed it.

So what are you waiting for?

So, while the deed is in my name,

it's also in Blake's office.

In the manor.

Which I'm banned from.

But if I can just get my hands on it,

then Blake would have
no recourse when I sell.

Well, maybe there's something I can do.

Nah.

I said "recourse," not "intercourse."

Somebody has a secret lover.

Playing hide-and-seek?

Kirby, what are you doing here?

I live here.

Question is, what are you doing here?

Clearly not looking for me.

Or texting me.

I feel terrible about that.

- Really?
- That's why I came.

For an in-person apology.

Why should I believe a word you say?

- Why would I lie about being excited to see you?
- Eh.

That does sound like it could be true.

So, should I take you up

to my room and show
you pics of Australia

or just throw you on my bed?

I was thinking about
something a little more...

dangerous.

- How do you get this... Sorry.
- Shut up!

Oh!

That was insane.

Yeah. I've never had anyone do the...

I learned that in Montana.

Ah. Bear country.

- Mm-hmm.
- That makes sense.

Yeah.

This has to be the last time we do this.

It's just... it's-it's too complicated

and... messy.

Yeah. I agree.

Except not really.

You should go first. All right?

I'm not going anywhere until you tell me
why you're really here.

Well, I know it wasn't to see me.

Or even to see me naked.

I'm here for the deed to the vineyard,

and I found it.

Good for you.

But you know if you need
something stolen from the manor,

you can always just ask me.

Fallon.

Welcome to London.

What are you doing here?

Did they already reject
your pitch in record time?

I wish I could say I was sorry, but...

I didn't go. See, I had to tell you
the real end of the story.

The P.I. had the Peach
Diamond the whole time.

Okay, you know
how confused I was before?

Well, this isn't helping.

Can I please go in the room now?

Sure.

What?

No.

Can I at least ask the question first?

Fallon Carrington,

will you marry me?

No. Wait. Not until you tell me
what the hell is going on here.

Well, I just proposed to you.

There's no pitch.

I made the story up on the plane.

I saw your ring yesterday,

and I wanted to be the one
to propose to you this time.

Wait, you knew I was about to
propose and you didn't let me?

That's so rude.

See, I knew if you were pissed off
at me, you wouldn't propose,

so I pretended like you
didn't understand the story,

because I know you like to be
the smartest person in the room.

Well, I don't like it.
It's more of a curse, really.

And it worked.

You're surprised.

So, what do you say?

"Let's run away together, baby.

Me and you."

"Till the end of time."

I'm worried about my friend Sam.
He's falling in love with you,

and he thinks the feeling is mutual.

He's right. I'm crazy about him.

Never met anybody like Sam.

He's so fun but also amazingly deep

and gentle.

And hot.

Oh.

So if you came here to get
me to dump him, no way.

I didn't come here to get
you to break up with him.

I came here to get you
to be honest with him

about where this is going.

And if you really think
he's that special,

you need to do the right thing,

no matter how hard it is.

Mm-hmm.

I paid you half when we met in Mexico.

Here's the other half.

Got a picture for me?

This woman killed my
ex-lover and my unborn baby

and tried to put my husband in jail.

There needs to be a
price for her actions.

I'm pretty sure this
is the ultimate price.

Hey.

Hey.

I just talked to Fletcher.

And?

Oh, no.

- He dumped me.
- He did not.

I was there.

What did he say?

Some crap about how his
husband can't handle it

and he's jealous

and that I didn't deserve
to be in the middle

of this messy situation,

which should make me feel better.

But it doesn't.

I'm sorry, Sam.

You deserve so much better than that.

I know.

Hey.

Where have you been?
Your cell kept going to voice mail.

Oh. Um, the battery died.

Sorry about that.

But I'm here now.

Okay...

What are you up to?

I just had to take care of a few
personal things with my family.

But everything's back on track now.

Can I just say how proud I am of you

for not murdering Dominique yet?

I am all about self-control.

Mm. This makes me so happy,

I almost forgot that
I got dumped earlier.

Oh, wait, I got to tell you
the best part of the story.

Oh, you mean the part where
I knew you were gonna propose

and I made sure Fallon got
on that plane to London?

What?

You knew and you didn't tell me?

- Great part.
- Not the best part.

No. The best part being

when you proposed and I said yes, right?

I was thinking more about the
part where I totally fooled you.

Right.

But which is the best part of the story

that you'll be telling for decades?

You said yes.

I said yes.

Well, love may not have
worked out for me,

but I could not be happier for you two.

Oh. I'll never dump you, Sam.

Thanks, bro.

Well, I would love to stay
and soak all of this in,

but I do have a
re-engagement party to plan.

- Mwah. Let's talk.
- Let's go.

♪ Baby, I need your touch ♪

♪ I wanna lose control... ♪

Heidi?

Hello, Liam.

What are you doing here?

Been a long time, right?

Since Switzerland.

I think the last time we
spoke was when I told you

I was putting the baby up for adoption.

Look, is there something you want?

Something I can help you with?

That's my son, Connor.

Our son, Connor.

It's time he meets his father.