Dynasty (2017–…): Season 1, Episode 16 - Poor Little Rich Girl - full transcript
The Carringtons' move from a wedding to a funeral; Steven steps in to help Sam; Jeff declares war.
Previously on Dynasty...
My offer clearly says the
Carrington Atlantic shares
are yours once we're legally married.
- Feels pretty legal to me.
- Unfortunately, bigamy is
illegal in the state of Georgia.
Are you in the market?
- For what?
- Biggest payday of your life.
This is Liam, my husband.
My marriage is completely legal,
which means ours isn't.
And neither is my contract.
Unless we're married,
my C.A. gift to you is void.
I'm not gonna let an
expired visa keep us apart.
I'd like to report
an undocumented immigrant.
Blake Carrington.
What the hell?
I'm having a heart attack!
What did you do?
We need to get out of here right now.
Go!
Wedding, to the left.
Funeral, to the right.
Wedding, to the left. Ah.
Congratulations or condolences?
Over this side. Thank you very much.
And that...
can go directly to Mr. Carrington.
I'll take it.
Yes, funeral to this side. Thank you.
I didn't hear you come
to bed last night.
Did you get any sleep at all?
No. I was on the phone with London,
Sydney, Shanghai.
Carrington Atlantic's
chairman of the board died
without warning 48 hours ago.
So did your father.
Our clients need to be assured
there'll be no interruption
- of operations.
- I can handle all that.
You need a moment to grieve.
I'm fine.
What do you want me to do, Cristal?
Curl up and cry?
If that's what you need, yes.
Blake, you don't have
to be a soldier right now.
You can talk to me.
- Or someone.
- I don't need a damn therapist.
The only person I need
to talk to right now
is my pipeline manager in Dubai.
So if you want to talk about feelings,
just go do it somewhere else.
100,000.
That's the number we agreed
upon at the courthouse.
And how about a time frame?
Uh, we didn't really
settle on a hard number.
Annulment versus divorce.
Didn't really get that far.
- A nondisclosure agreement?
- Look,
this wasn't my finest hour,
as a businessperson,
or a person person.
But I know the risks of
marrying a complete stranger.
That is why I hired you.
Well, the good news is
you haven't paid him yet.
So we'll draw up the papers immediately,
and have Liam come to the
office later today to sign them.
If only my other fake
marriage had been so simple.
What are you gonna do about Jeff?
Cristal Carrington.
My stepmother.
- Jackie Littman.
- My divorce lawyer.
There's nothing to do about Jeff.
I figured I would lay
low for a few weeks,
let the wedding coverage blow over,
and then
quietly tell a few people
it didn't work out.
And what about the funeral?
Yeah, I didn't exactly plan
on Grandpa tapping out at the wedding.
If Jeff's not there tomorrow,
people are gonna ask questions.
And I don't want him answering them.
Well, maybe you should
say something first.
I don't want to piss him off, either.
Well, at least,
not before Liam signs the NDA.
Look, I doubt Jeff wants
the truth out there
any more than you do.
If you can get ahead of the questions
and offer an innocent explanation,
blame yourself, even...
...you'd actually be doing him a favor.
What do you mean?
Just say I got cold feet?
Well, in light of what happened
with your grandfather,
I mean, who could blame you?
Death has a way of giving us clarity.
Maybe you just realized you
weren't ready for marriage.
Well, if there's anything
Grandpa would have wanted,
it would be for me to
get away from Jeff Colby.
I'll put out a statement this morning.
What?
Your mail.
I see you haven't forgotten the address.
I was wondering where all these were.
Well, apologies for the delay,
but I have had more important
matters to attend to
over the last few days
than your online shopping.
_
_
_
You know,
I admire your reputation
for representing women.
I know it's not always
where the money is,
but especially these days,
we have to stick together, don't we?
We do.
Oh, I didn't mean...
Oh, no. Of course not.
But if you have any friends who do,
have them give me a call?
Of course. Thank you.
Sure.
"Per Mr. Carrington's
last will and testament,
"his instructions for his
funeral are as follows:
"Mr. Carrington is to be
dressed in a plain black suit
"from Harrow and Sons Tailors in London,
and placed in a simple oak casket."
A man of the people to the very end.
"White Miltonia orchids
will fill the sanctuary,
"and after, the casket will be taken
"to Oakland Cemetery in
a hearse drawn by a team
of Belgian black horses,
accompanied by a brass band."
Spoke too soon.
It's not like he's here
to enjoy any of it.
Everyone deserves a last hurrah,
don't they?
Fine.
Anders, I trust
you can handle the arrangements?
Well, not all of them, I'm afraid.
- What?
- Well, he's asked
"that his grandchildren perform
a song for the congregation,
"as he so loved in life,
"and that he be buried
with his treasured copy
of The Canterbury Tales."
It's in his personal
library in Savannah.
You can send somebody.
He wanted you to retrieve it.
From Savannah?
- Yes, sir.
- Absolutely not.
There's too much going
on with the company.
There's no way I'm going all the way to
that godforsaken house just
to pick up some old book.
Well, he specifically instructed...
I don't care what he instructed!
He's been ordering me
around his whole life.
He's sure as hell not gonna
do it from beyond the grave.
I don't have to listen to him anymore.
And you know what? I'm glad.
That is no way to speak
about your father.
I was just walking Liam
through what we went over this morning.
Yeah. Just tell me where to sign.
All right. Nondisclosure, here.
Okay.
And the petition for annulment.
For what it's worth,
you're the best first wife I ever had.
Only until tomorrow.
As soon as we get this petition
in front of a judge and
get everything finalized,
it will be as if you were
never married at all.
Oh.
Guess I should probably
cancel the registry.
I had my eye set on these
stainless steel pineapple skewers.
Well, now you can afford the whole set.
Yeah. Or I could just buy the
kebab place around the corner.
You hungry? My treat.
Well... technically, it's yours.
I don't really do food on sticks.
Seriously?
What about popsicles?
- Chicken satay? Corn dogs?
- _
What the hell is that?
They're delicious, but...
Did you know he was doing this?
Now we are with Jeff Colby.
Thanks for having us.
- Of course.
- Earlier today,
Fallon Carrington released
a statement announcing
the two of you had split,
only two days after your wedding.
I thought I'd found my soul mate.
The woman of my dreams.
Fallon lied to me,
because we were never
married in the first place.
And her statement today makes
me question her grip on reality,
and her ability to run Morell Corp.
Whoa, what is he doing?
Declaring war.
What did you do?
What did I do?
Did you see the statement
Fallon put out this morning?
She straight-up lied, Moni.
And if you think I'm
letting her get away with...
And what do you care?
She didn't bring your name into it.
She didn't tell people that you
signed over Morell or Colby Co.
Because she stole them.
She committed fraud, and she knows it.
And you didn't?
You played the same game.
You just can't admit that you lost.
- Whose team are you on here?
- Ours.
What you lost is only money,
but we got our father back.
Why would you jeopardize that?
You want to talk to me about Dad?
You have no idea how much
I've done to protect him.
Of course I do.
You know he pulled a gun on
Thomas Carrington at the wedding?
- What?
- Yeah.
He gave him a heart attack, Moni.
The old guy was literally
killed by his racism.
But you didn't know that,
because I got Dad out of there.
I protected him.
Whatever happened,
it's all the more reason
for you to be careful now.
Drop this thing with Fallon
before you're the one
who destroys our family.
Hey. What's going on?
Besides Anders slapping
my dad in the face?
What? Why?
Let's just say they're
grieving in different ways.
How about you?
I'm not sure what to be feeling.
Grandpa and I didn't exactly
have the easiest relationship.
The irony is, after all that struggle,
I'm the only one who got
some closure with him.
You deserve it, Steven.
No, but my dad's still so angry at him,
and maybe I should be, too.
Mostly, I'd rather just
celebrate the silver lining.
Is that weird?
I think it's kind of beautiful.
Thanks.
Mm.
What's this?
"Deported"?
Seriously, Sam, what is this?
They know I'm here without papers.
I don't know how they found out.
- Well, except...
- What?
I think it could've been Jeff Colby.
From my Morell paperwork.
Maybe he thought it would
hurt Fallon somehow?
Why didn't you say something?
Seemed like everyone had enough
on their plate right now.
That doesn't mean you should
have to do this alone.
We're in this together now,
and we're gonna figure it out.
- Did you call a lawyer?
- Yes, and it's not good.
It's not like I can just say
I forgot to renew my visa;
I got fake papers.
And the system's not exactly
famous for gray areas, so...
Well... just have to beat the system.
You all right?
Will you stop asking me that? I'm fine.
If anything,
it's Anders that needs to see a shrink.
I understand that he had
an attachment to my father.
I've known the man since I was born.
I mean, he taught me how to shave,
and that's why I let it slide.
But I do not need an employee
or a ghost telling me what to do.
You're right.
Your father was a miserable man.
I certainly never heard
a kind word from him.
As far as I'm concerned,
he doesn't deserve another
moment of your life.
Well, thank you.
But you can't move on
and nothing can move forward
if you don't go to Savannah.
The longer you fight him,
the longer you let him loom over you.
But the sooner you get this over with,
the sooner you can be free.
Where the hell do you get off?
Calling me a liar after
everything that you've done?
You lied.
Not just to me,
to the whole entire Internet.
I didn't invent that marriage license.
No, you just bugged my house,
you puppeted my brother,
you proposed to me to get to my father.
I didn't start this war, Jeff.
You did. Now when are you
gonna admit that you lost it?
You think you've won?
You spent seven
figures on a fake wedding
and gave your grandfather a
heart attack in the process.
Excuse me, what does my grandfather
have to do with any of this?
Oh, you think it's a coincidence?
You ran with this whole charade,
collateral damage be damned.
And for what? Some shares?
It's all gonna be for nothing
because I'm gonna take
back every single thing
you stole from me,
starting with this office.
I'll leave your things outside.
It's a shame this is all
that's left of your company.
This is what you killed him for.
You want to carry this yourself?
Guess not.
Look me in the eye and say it again.
Say what?
That you're the reason
your grandfather's dead?
Oh-ho, here we go.
Poor little rich girl
shows her true colors.
Well, I hope you got a
good look at those colors
'cause it'll be a cold day in hell
- before you ever see them again!
- Hey.
What the hell?
You want to gaslight me?
I will set the gasoline on fire.
I was so sorry to hear
about your grandfather.
That's very kind. Thank you.
But what a pleasant
surprise to hear from you.
Are you holding up?
We're all muddling through.
I hope you and Paul will be able
to come to the service tomorrow.
Yes, of course.
Thomas was a good friend
to us for many years.
And if there's anything else we can do.
That's actually why I'm here.
I was hoping you could
help me solve a problem.
What is it?
It's, uh, my stepmother's nephew, Sam.
He's been ordered to appear
before an immigration judge.
The thing is, his immigration paperwork
is a little out of order.
I'm trying to help him
get it sorted out, quickly.
I'm afraid I don't have
any good friends at ICE.
I thought that Paul might.
I know he's on the other
side of this issue,
but being a senator,
he should be able to help
secure a new visa for Sam.
Well, Paul and I haven't been
having the easiest time lately.
Sex scandals tend to have
that effect on a marriage.
Yeah, I know, and I'm-I'm sorry.
I wouldn't be asking if it
wasn't important, Melissa.
Well, Paul certainly does owe me.
I would, too.
And I wouldn't be opposed
to a trip down memory lane.
That was a long time ago.
Ten years is not that long.
Well, I hadn't really
figured things out then.
Hmm, well...
I'm sure you have now.
Hey.
You have a bike?
Or the helmet just for show?
Yeah. I, uh, wasn't sure where to park,
so I left it at the
bottom of the driveway.
Fallon asked me to come
by about some paperwork.
How much is she paying you?
Pretty sure I'm not
legally allowed to say.
Well, whatever it is,
just take it and run.
Sorry?
It's really easy to get
sucked in with Fallon.
But at the end of the day,
she'll just chew you
up and spit you out.
Anyway, she's in there.
Thanks.
Well, it still smells the same.
When was the last time
you were in Savannah?
- 1998.
- What?
We were here for Christmas.
My father chewed out Steven
for quitting peewee football.
Said he was spitting on the
legacy of 12 generations
- of Carringtons.
- Twelve?
Uh, it was 20 years ago;
I don't remember the exact number.
I just remember dragging
my crying kid out of here,
and then Fallon crying
because we were leaving.
And you never once came back?
Alexis brought the
kids here a few times.
He always liked her better.
That tape was an
incomplete representation
of events, at best,
but I promise you,
I am fully competent to lead Morell Corp
and to continue the same service
that you've been enjoying.
No, this isn't a spam call.
Son of a bitch!
Miss me already?
I, uh, I didn't know where to park,
so I took the spot marked
"ex-fake-husband."
Or is Colby gonna have me towed?
Thank you for coming.
Uh, it's okay. I already saw it.
And the dubstep remix.
What? Already?
The Internet.
But, uh, you got a mean right hook.
They're comparing me to 2007 Britney.
I mean, I can't even get Solange.
Yeah, I'm not sure that's how it works.
Whatever. I have clients
jumping ship left and right,
asking me if I'm fit
to run my own company.
Well, you might have
a future in the ring.
Sorry. Too soon.
Too soon.
But you can help me.
Do you want to hang out
for a couple more days?
"Hang out"?
Oh, I mean, I would pay you, obviously.
Another 100 grand just to keep
the annulment papers on ice
and to make a quick appearance
at the funeral tomorrow.
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Like as your husband?
Look, I can't afford
to lose two sham marriages
in two days.
What about 200?
I actually have a family thing tomorrow.
My Aunt Lydia's having a barbeque.
Just tell me a number.
I don't want money.
Well, then what do you want?
Baby back ribs?
Look, the past couple
days have been a lot of fun.
Okay? Very Pretty Woman.
Or the edgy gender reversal sequel.
But I have paparazzi camped
outside my apartment right now.
Reporters are digging through my trash.
My name is a TMZ headline.
Well, only until the next
swipe in the Kimye-Taylor feud.
It's more than I signed up for, Fallon.
I'm a regular person.
I'm supposed to be at my
aunt's barbeque tomorrow.
So, I'm just gonna walk away slowly.
250.
- Here I go.
- Seriously?
You're just gonna walk away from 250K?
I can't afford not to.
Says something that he kept this.
Probably to spite me.
She's pretty.
I didn't come here to talk about Alexis.
I didn't mean anything, Blake.
We don't have to talk about her,
but I would like you to talk to me.
What do you want from me?
I let you talk me into coming here.
- Didn't I?
- Yes, but you're obviously in pain.
You don't have to just soldier through.
You don't have to be stoic, not for me.
You're allowed to be a regular person.
I'm not a regular person, Cristal.
Why you keep trying to make me into one?
What do you mean?
The way I run my business,
the way I protect my children,
the way I grieve for my father.
- That's not fair.
- No, it's not.
So why don't you stop?
You know who I am.
You knew when you married me.
It's why you married me.
That is not true.
Oh, come on!
You wear the clothes,
you drive the cars,
you drink the champagne.
It's just like Alexis.
- Wow.
- You signed the prenup.
Seven million for every year.
If that's not enough for you,
well, maybe you should just go.
I've been looking for you.
Generally,
when someone can't be located,
it's because they don't want to be.
Steven told me what happened.
Big move to smack your boss.
Well, it's not the first time.
When Blake was 11,
he was being insolent to his mother,
something along the lines of,
"Up your nose with a rubber hose."
Thomas was away on business,
but when he heard about it,
he insisted on a spanking by proxy.
Hey, man. Rich people are weird.
Mm.
So what are you having?
It's a 1907 Heidsieck &
Company Monopole champagne
from the Titanic,
salvaged from the bottom of the sea.
- That must be worth...
- Twice my annual salary, yes.
Thomas bought it at auction,
gave it to me,
said I should drink a toast
should the grim reaper ever come and
"bang him in the ass."
Do you want company?
I wouldn't object to tasting something
that has been so close to Leo DiCaprio.
You know, fictionally.
Unfortunately, I can't bring myself
to drink a toast to Thomas Carrington.
I thought you guys were tight.
We were.
But I've been contacting
his various female
companions to let them know
about his untimely demise.
Damn, plural?
I didn't recognize the last
number that he had dialed,
so I dialed it.
It was the Immigration and
Customs Enforcement hotline.
ICE?
He called ICE on me?
- I'm afraid so.
- Why?
Why would he do that?
I don't know.
Should've had Frank
change the back gate code.
Don't think the Carringtons
would be too happy
to have a Colby on their property,
after that mess of a wedding.
I just wanted to bring
you your stuff back.
It's not like you've
been taking my calls.
Why would I?
I also wanted to apologize
for misleading you.
I thought you were just
trying to make Fallon jealous.
Well, I was when it first started.
I had no idea what had really happened
between my dad and Blake.
But when I found out,
I had to choose a side.
But I shouldn't have misled you.
I lied to you.
I thought that I was protecting my dad,
but now Jeff has taken this
whole thing way too far.
It's like all he cares about is revenge.
Yeah, I think Fallon's
completely lost perspective.
Look, I'm sorry, too.
For what?
I lied to you.
Thought I was protecting Fallon.
Living around all this excess
starts to feel normal after a while.
Yeah. I want out.
I just don't know how.
Not even a first edition.
It's just like you.
All pomp, no substance.
I bet you didn't even read it.
_
Sit down, Thomas.
This is ridiculous.
I don't know why you're
making me do this.
Because someday,
Blake will need to hear it,
and you won't always
be around to tell him.
- This is stupid.
- Just do it.
I don't know why I have to say it.
Of course I love him.
He's my son.
That wasn't so hard, was it?
I'm sorry he didn't
say that to you in person.
He should have.
As for Alexis...
You never thought
you'd hear me say this.
I wish she were here.
Yes, hi. This is Cristal Carrington.
Jackie and I spoke this morning.
I'd like to make an appointment.
No, it's for me.
♪ Just remember ♪
♪ In the winter ♪
♪ Far beneath ♪
♪ The bitter snow ♪
♪ Lies the seed ♪
♪ That with the sun's love ♪
♪ In the spring ♪
♪ Becomes the rose. ♪
Do you think Grandpa is trolling us?
Maybe he loved Bette Midler.
I'm trying to give him
the benefit of the doubt.
Ugh. Don't sound so well-adjusted.
Don't worry.
I just had sex with my ex-girlfriend
to stop my boyfriend
from getting deported.
Ex-girlfriend? But you only had one.
- Mrs. Daniels?
- I think you mean Mrs. Robinson.
Well, who am I to judge?
I just asked the stranger
I paid to marry me
to come with me to Grandpa's funeral,
so I'm only slightly more sane.
We never had a fighting chance, did we?
Not like we had any real role models.
Oh, who?
Dad, the workaholic with rage issues
who can't discern the
potency of his own cologne?
Or Mom, who ditched us
before I ever had the emotional
vocabulary to describe her?
Am I interrupting?
No. We were just rehearsing our
loving musical tribute to Grandpa.
- Is everything okay?
- No.
No. I owe you both an apology,
both of you.
Have you been drinking?
Quite a bit, but I still mean it.
Steven, I'm sorry that I pushed
you into that charade with Ted.
I thought I was helping you,
helping your career,
but it is not worth
jeopardizing your integrity.
Uh, thank you.
And, Fallon...
I'm sorry I made you go
through with the wedding.
It should not be up to you
to protect our secrets,
my secrets.
This whole mess is my fault.
I went too far,
and I pushed you guys too far.
And I want you both to
know that I love you.
Whether or not you do what I say,
whether or not I disagree with you,
I never want you to doubt that.
Did you replace our
father with a cyborg?
No, it's me.
It's so lifelike.
I love you, too, Dad.
Don't worry, we won't tell anyone.
Okay. I love you, too, Cyborg Dad.
Okay.
I'm gonna get another round.
I... No, um...
There's one more thing I
need to talk to you about.
Sit down.
Cristal's been telling
me for a while now
that the Carrington Atlantic
brand could use some refreshing,
and I'm not signing the
Paris Agreement or anything,
but we could stand to "green"
our portfolio a little.
I wonder if Morell could fill the void.
I don't need you
swooping in to rescue me.
No, it's the other way around.
C.A. needs to step into the future,
not dwell in the past.
It's never too late to change, right?
Unless you're dead.
That is why you are
not doing the eulogy.
Carrington Atlantic surprised analysts
by announcing a production partnership
with the Morell Green
Energy Corporation.
Some saw the move as strategic
in the wake of an altercation
between Fallon Carrington
and her former partner Jeff Colby.
We need to talk.
You see that?
I had the whole thing under control.
The whole world can see
Fallon's getting bailed
out by her daddy.
She's a mess.
She's not the only one.
I'm not letting this crazy
feud continue anymore.
Mr. Colby?
Yes?
Is your father here?
What did you do?
What I should've done a long time ago.
I filed to take over Dad's guardianship.
I'm moving him to my place,
away from you and your
war with the Carringtons.
He's upstairs.
You can't be serious.
He'll never go along with it.
He's already agreed.
You're the one that put him in
danger with this stupid wedding.
And if you're not gonna look after him,
then I have to.
This is all for him.
I used to believe that.
But now I see that it was all for you.
So do what you need to do,
but you're on your own, Jeff.
Is this some kind of photo op?
No. Though you weren't kidding.
There are a lot of paparazzi out there.
- Yeah.
- I'm sorry about that.
You do realize that
showing up at my house
isn't really helping the situation,
right?
I know, but...
I just wanted to
apologize for everything.
Seemed kind of long for a text.
Maybe more like an e-mail situation.
But since you're here already,
might as well just go ahead and say it.
I'm sorry for wrecking your
life by tangling you up in mine.
I'm sorry for inviting you
to my grandpa's funeral.
I'm sorry for asking you to
marry me in the first place.
I mean, that's not really how
regular people do things, is it?
Well, regular people also don't agree
to marry complete strangers, either.
If there's a TLC show about it,
it's usually a red flag.
Well, I don't know any other way.
I mean, the Carrington impulse
is to throw money at a problem,
and then, when that doesn't work, lie.
Look, I'm sorry, too.
I imagine that's a pretty lonely
way to go through the world.
I'm just a rich girl standing
in front of a poor boy,
asking him to forgive her.
I don't know if I'm more
insulted by that or the fact
that you just completely
butchered Notting Hill.
Never seen it.
Here. I want you to have this.
It's our annulment papers.
You can file them,
and you can be rid of me
and my lunatic family forever.
Lucky you.
Oh, and, um...
have fun at your Aunt Lydia's.
Are you still interested in
tasting that fine champagne
I showed you before the funeral?
I thought you bailed on the toast.
Well, there are other things
we could toast to.
Leonardo DiCaprio, for one.
Be a shame to let such a
fine bottle go to waste.
Well, we'll pee it out in 30 minutes,
but I'll always toast to Leo.
If there are any other
expensive boozes you want to pawn off...
Don't push it.
What's going on? What's that?
An O-1 visa.
Yours, specifically.
How'd you get it?
Uh, family friend with a family friend.
"Extraordinary ability or achievement"?
It means you bring
something special to the United States.
And you do, especially to me.
Thank you.
So, to Thomas Carrington's...
friends in high places.
And to your new uncle.
Uncle Sam.
Thomas would've hated this.
I'll drink to that.
You got a pen?
I think so.
Look in my purse.
Jackie Littman?
- She was at the house.
- For Fallon.
Why do you have her card?
You leaving me?
Blake, please.
Before I've even buried my father?
You're worse than Alexis.
- You don't understand.
- I don't want to hear it!
Not now!
Would you just do me a favor
and play the grieving
daughter-in-law today.
Okay?
After all, I'm paying you enough.
You clean up well.
It's my grandfather's funeral.
Well, if you need to talk, or something.
Uh...
Uh, Melissa, this is Sam, my partner.
Hi.
- You know Mrs. Daniels.
- Yeah, sure.
Um, your husband is Mr...
Ah, hanging by a thread.
He hopes you, uh,
enjoy your time here in the U.S.
Uh, Paul Daniels helped get your visa.
Oh, my God, I didn't realize.
Thank you so much.
Um, I'd like to thank him, too.
Is he in there?
Oh, I'm sure he's around here somewhere.
But I'm sorry,
it must be sort of strange
to be commemorating the life of
a man who tried to ruin yours.
What are you talking about?
Uh, Steven,
are you supposed to be inside?
Oh, you didn't know.
When Paul was looking into his visa,
he found out that your grandfather's
the one that tipped off ICE.
He was a... a complicated man.
I'll see you inside.
Did you know?
Anders told me.
But I didn't want to ruin
your memory of your grandpa.
Steven?
They want to show you the organ.
Is everything all right?
Blake seemed upset when he walked in,
and not about his father.
Blake and I had a fight.
And he found Jackie Littman's
business card in my purse.
Now he's convinced I want a divorce.
And do you?
No. The opposite.
I called Jackie Littman to
change my end of the prenup.
- Excuse me?
- Every time Blake and I fight,
it's never on equal footing.
The money is always looming over me.
So I'm taking it out of the equation.
If that's what it takes
for Blake to believe that
I love him just for him,
I will happily do it.
Well, that sounds...
Stupid? Impulsive? Maybe.
But I'm not quitting on him.
And I'm not letting him quit on me.
I was gonna say "romantic."
If only Blake would let
me explain that to him.
He will.
Now, Mrs. Carrington,
let's get you down in the front,
where he can see you.
Looks like I haven't missed anything.
What are you doing here?
Well, I'm your husband, aren't I?
And I figured you could
use a friendly face today.
You do owe me some barbecue, though.
Okay, but you're paying.
Jack?
I didn't know you knew
Thomas Carrington.
Uh, sorry,
I think you have the wrong person.
You just look so familiar.
You're not John and Laura's boy?
Uh, sorry.
I'm so sorry for your loss.
Thank you all for coming today.
As you can see, my grandfather was
a man who liked to show
off our family's success.
But he saved his most generous gift
for the last day of his life.
That was the day he
finally gave me acceptance.
And today,
I'm choosing to celebrate that.
Sam.
_
_
_
_
_
Thank you, Steven,
for those, um... thoughtful words.
My father was an icon, a titan.
And if we're being honest,
he could be a real piece of work.
Which is why I never thought
I'd be speaking about love
at his funeral.
Just wasn't a feeling that
I associated with him.
I mistakenly thought
that the only thing that
he loved was his job.
Until yesterday.
Yesterday, I discovered that
he had gone out of his way
to make sure that I knew
exactly what he loved.
He loved buying rare
and expensive treasures
for his closest friends.
He loved listening to
his grandchildren sing.
And he loved me.
Death itself
can be very jarring.
However, the clarity that it brings
is remarkable.
Magnificent, even.
You think you know someone,
and then something happens
that changes everything forever.
Today is that day for me.
I can never unknow what I now know.
The writing is on the wall.
And so, today...
Oh, my God.
That's my mother.
Sorry I'm late.
Traffic was a bitch.
by LiviuBoss
My offer clearly says the
Carrington Atlantic shares
are yours once we're legally married.
- Feels pretty legal to me.
- Unfortunately, bigamy is
illegal in the state of Georgia.
Are you in the market?
- For what?
- Biggest payday of your life.
This is Liam, my husband.
My marriage is completely legal,
which means ours isn't.
And neither is my contract.
Unless we're married,
my C.A. gift to you is void.
I'm not gonna let an
expired visa keep us apart.
I'd like to report
an undocumented immigrant.
Blake Carrington.
What the hell?
I'm having a heart attack!
What did you do?
We need to get out of here right now.
Go!
Wedding, to the left.
Funeral, to the right.
Wedding, to the left. Ah.
Congratulations or condolences?
Over this side. Thank you very much.
And that...
can go directly to Mr. Carrington.
I'll take it.
Yes, funeral to this side. Thank you.
I didn't hear you come
to bed last night.
Did you get any sleep at all?
No. I was on the phone with London,
Sydney, Shanghai.
Carrington Atlantic's
chairman of the board died
without warning 48 hours ago.
So did your father.
Our clients need to be assured
there'll be no interruption
- of operations.
- I can handle all that.
You need a moment to grieve.
I'm fine.
What do you want me to do, Cristal?
Curl up and cry?
If that's what you need, yes.
Blake, you don't have
to be a soldier right now.
You can talk to me.
- Or someone.
- I don't need a damn therapist.
The only person I need
to talk to right now
is my pipeline manager in Dubai.
So if you want to talk about feelings,
just go do it somewhere else.
100,000.
That's the number we agreed
upon at the courthouse.
And how about a time frame?
Uh, we didn't really
settle on a hard number.
Annulment versus divorce.
Didn't really get that far.
- A nondisclosure agreement?
- Look,
this wasn't my finest hour,
as a businessperson,
or a person person.
But I know the risks of
marrying a complete stranger.
That is why I hired you.
Well, the good news is
you haven't paid him yet.
So we'll draw up the papers immediately,
and have Liam come to the
office later today to sign them.
If only my other fake
marriage had been so simple.
What are you gonna do about Jeff?
Cristal Carrington.
My stepmother.
- Jackie Littman.
- My divorce lawyer.
There's nothing to do about Jeff.
I figured I would lay
low for a few weeks,
let the wedding coverage blow over,
and then
quietly tell a few people
it didn't work out.
And what about the funeral?
Yeah, I didn't exactly plan
on Grandpa tapping out at the wedding.
If Jeff's not there tomorrow,
people are gonna ask questions.
And I don't want him answering them.
Well, maybe you should
say something first.
I don't want to piss him off, either.
Well, at least,
not before Liam signs the NDA.
Look, I doubt Jeff wants
the truth out there
any more than you do.
If you can get ahead of the questions
and offer an innocent explanation,
blame yourself, even...
...you'd actually be doing him a favor.
What do you mean?
Just say I got cold feet?
Well, in light of what happened
with your grandfather,
I mean, who could blame you?
Death has a way of giving us clarity.
Maybe you just realized you
weren't ready for marriage.
Well, if there's anything
Grandpa would have wanted,
it would be for me to
get away from Jeff Colby.
I'll put out a statement this morning.
What?
Your mail.
I see you haven't forgotten the address.
I was wondering where all these were.
Well, apologies for the delay,
but I have had more important
matters to attend to
over the last few days
than your online shopping.
_
_
_
You know,
I admire your reputation
for representing women.
I know it's not always
where the money is,
but especially these days,
we have to stick together, don't we?
We do.
Oh, I didn't mean...
Oh, no. Of course not.
But if you have any friends who do,
have them give me a call?
Of course. Thank you.
Sure.
"Per Mr. Carrington's
last will and testament,
"his instructions for his
funeral are as follows:
"Mr. Carrington is to be
dressed in a plain black suit
"from Harrow and Sons Tailors in London,
and placed in a simple oak casket."
A man of the people to the very end.
"White Miltonia orchids
will fill the sanctuary,
"and after, the casket will be taken
"to Oakland Cemetery in
a hearse drawn by a team
of Belgian black horses,
accompanied by a brass band."
Spoke too soon.
It's not like he's here
to enjoy any of it.
Everyone deserves a last hurrah,
don't they?
Fine.
Anders, I trust
you can handle the arrangements?
Well, not all of them, I'm afraid.
- What?
- Well, he's asked
"that his grandchildren perform
a song for the congregation,
"as he so loved in life,
"and that he be buried
with his treasured copy
of The Canterbury Tales."
It's in his personal
library in Savannah.
You can send somebody.
He wanted you to retrieve it.
From Savannah?
- Yes, sir.
- Absolutely not.
There's too much going
on with the company.
There's no way I'm going all the way to
that godforsaken house just
to pick up some old book.
Well, he specifically instructed...
I don't care what he instructed!
He's been ordering me
around his whole life.
He's sure as hell not gonna
do it from beyond the grave.
I don't have to listen to him anymore.
And you know what? I'm glad.
That is no way to speak
about your father.
I was just walking Liam
through what we went over this morning.
Yeah. Just tell me where to sign.
All right. Nondisclosure, here.
Okay.
And the petition for annulment.
For what it's worth,
you're the best first wife I ever had.
Only until tomorrow.
As soon as we get this petition
in front of a judge and
get everything finalized,
it will be as if you were
never married at all.
Oh.
Guess I should probably
cancel the registry.
I had my eye set on these
stainless steel pineapple skewers.
Well, now you can afford the whole set.
Yeah. Or I could just buy the
kebab place around the corner.
You hungry? My treat.
Well... technically, it's yours.
I don't really do food on sticks.
Seriously?
What about popsicles?
- Chicken satay? Corn dogs?
- _
What the hell is that?
They're delicious, but...
Did you know he was doing this?
Now we are with Jeff Colby.
Thanks for having us.
- Of course.
- Earlier today,
Fallon Carrington released
a statement announcing
the two of you had split,
only two days after your wedding.
I thought I'd found my soul mate.
The woman of my dreams.
Fallon lied to me,
because we were never
married in the first place.
And her statement today makes
me question her grip on reality,
and her ability to run Morell Corp.
Whoa, what is he doing?
Declaring war.
What did you do?
What did I do?
Did you see the statement
Fallon put out this morning?
She straight-up lied, Moni.
And if you think I'm
letting her get away with...
And what do you care?
She didn't bring your name into it.
She didn't tell people that you
signed over Morell or Colby Co.
Because she stole them.
She committed fraud, and she knows it.
And you didn't?
You played the same game.
You just can't admit that you lost.
- Whose team are you on here?
- Ours.
What you lost is only money,
but we got our father back.
Why would you jeopardize that?
You want to talk to me about Dad?
You have no idea how much
I've done to protect him.
Of course I do.
You know he pulled a gun on
Thomas Carrington at the wedding?
- What?
- Yeah.
He gave him a heart attack, Moni.
The old guy was literally
killed by his racism.
But you didn't know that,
because I got Dad out of there.
I protected him.
Whatever happened,
it's all the more reason
for you to be careful now.
Drop this thing with Fallon
before you're the one
who destroys our family.
Hey. What's going on?
Besides Anders slapping
my dad in the face?
What? Why?
Let's just say they're
grieving in different ways.
How about you?
I'm not sure what to be feeling.
Grandpa and I didn't exactly
have the easiest relationship.
The irony is, after all that struggle,
I'm the only one who got
some closure with him.
You deserve it, Steven.
No, but my dad's still so angry at him,
and maybe I should be, too.
Mostly, I'd rather just
celebrate the silver lining.
Is that weird?
I think it's kind of beautiful.
Thanks.
Mm.
What's this?
"Deported"?
Seriously, Sam, what is this?
They know I'm here without papers.
I don't know how they found out.
- Well, except...
- What?
I think it could've been Jeff Colby.
From my Morell paperwork.
Maybe he thought it would
hurt Fallon somehow?
Why didn't you say something?
Seemed like everyone had enough
on their plate right now.
That doesn't mean you should
have to do this alone.
We're in this together now,
and we're gonna figure it out.
- Did you call a lawyer?
- Yes, and it's not good.
It's not like I can just say
I forgot to renew my visa;
I got fake papers.
And the system's not exactly
famous for gray areas, so...
Well... just have to beat the system.
You all right?
Will you stop asking me that? I'm fine.
If anything,
it's Anders that needs to see a shrink.
I understand that he had
an attachment to my father.
I've known the man since I was born.
I mean, he taught me how to shave,
and that's why I let it slide.
But I do not need an employee
or a ghost telling me what to do.
You're right.
Your father was a miserable man.
I certainly never heard
a kind word from him.
As far as I'm concerned,
he doesn't deserve another
moment of your life.
Well, thank you.
But you can't move on
and nothing can move forward
if you don't go to Savannah.
The longer you fight him,
the longer you let him loom over you.
But the sooner you get this over with,
the sooner you can be free.
Where the hell do you get off?
Calling me a liar after
everything that you've done?
You lied.
Not just to me,
to the whole entire Internet.
I didn't invent that marriage license.
No, you just bugged my house,
you puppeted my brother,
you proposed to me to get to my father.
I didn't start this war, Jeff.
You did. Now when are you
gonna admit that you lost it?
You think you've won?
You spent seven
figures on a fake wedding
and gave your grandfather a
heart attack in the process.
Excuse me, what does my grandfather
have to do with any of this?
Oh, you think it's a coincidence?
You ran with this whole charade,
collateral damage be damned.
And for what? Some shares?
It's all gonna be for nothing
because I'm gonna take
back every single thing
you stole from me,
starting with this office.
I'll leave your things outside.
It's a shame this is all
that's left of your company.
This is what you killed him for.
You want to carry this yourself?
Guess not.
Look me in the eye and say it again.
Say what?
That you're the reason
your grandfather's dead?
Oh-ho, here we go.
Poor little rich girl
shows her true colors.
Well, I hope you got a
good look at those colors
'cause it'll be a cold day in hell
- before you ever see them again!
- Hey.
What the hell?
You want to gaslight me?
I will set the gasoline on fire.
I was so sorry to hear
about your grandfather.
That's very kind. Thank you.
But what a pleasant
surprise to hear from you.
Are you holding up?
We're all muddling through.
I hope you and Paul will be able
to come to the service tomorrow.
Yes, of course.
Thomas was a good friend
to us for many years.
And if there's anything else we can do.
That's actually why I'm here.
I was hoping you could
help me solve a problem.
What is it?
It's, uh, my stepmother's nephew, Sam.
He's been ordered to appear
before an immigration judge.
The thing is, his immigration paperwork
is a little out of order.
I'm trying to help him
get it sorted out, quickly.
I'm afraid I don't have
any good friends at ICE.
I thought that Paul might.
I know he's on the other
side of this issue,
but being a senator,
he should be able to help
secure a new visa for Sam.
Well, Paul and I haven't been
having the easiest time lately.
Sex scandals tend to have
that effect on a marriage.
Yeah, I know, and I'm-I'm sorry.
I wouldn't be asking if it
wasn't important, Melissa.
Well, Paul certainly does owe me.
I would, too.
And I wouldn't be opposed
to a trip down memory lane.
That was a long time ago.
Ten years is not that long.
Well, I hadn't really
figured things out then.
Hmm, well...
I'm sure you have now.
Hey.
You have a bike?
Or the helmet just for show?
Yeah. I, uh, wasn't sure where to park,
so I left it at the
bottom of the driveway.
Fallon asked me to come
by about some paperwork.
How much is she paying you?
Pretty sure I'm not
legally allowed to say.
Well, whatever it is,
just take it and run.
Sorry?
It's really easy to get
sucked in with Fallon.
But at the end of the day,
she'll just chew you
up and spit you out.
Anyway, she's in there.
Thanks.
Well, it still smells the same.
When was the last time
you were in Savannah?
- 1998.
- What?
We were here for Christmas.
My father chewed out Steven
for quitting peewee football.
Said he was spitting on the
legacy of 12 generations
- of Carringtons.
- Twelve?
Uh, it was 20 years ago;
I don't remember the exact number.
I just remember dragging
my crying kid out of here,
and then Fallon crying
because we were leaving.
And you never once came back?
Alexis brought the
kids here a few times.
He always liked her better.
That tape was an
incomplete representation
of events, at best,
but I promise you,
I am fully competent to lead Morell Corp
and to continue the same service
that you've been enjoying.
No, this isn't a spam call.
Son of a bitch!
Miss me already?
I, uh, I didn't know where to park,
so I took the spot marked
"ex-fake-husband."
Or is Colby gonna have me towed?
Thank you for coming.
Uh, it's okay. I already saw it.
And the dubstep remix.
What? Already?
The Internet.
But, uh, you got a mean right hook.
They're comparing me to 2007 Britney.
I mean, I can't even get Solange.
Yeah, I'm not sure that's how it works.
Whatever. I have clients
jumping ship left and right,
asking me if I'm fit
to run my own company.
Well, you might have
a future in the ring.
Sorry. Too soon.
Too soon.
But you can help me.
Do you want to hang out
for a couple more days?
"Hang out"?
Oh, I mean, I would pay you, obviously.
Another 100 grand just to keep
the annulment papers on ice
and to make a quick appearance
at the funeral tomorrow.
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Like as your husband?
Look, I can't afford
to lose two sham marriages
in two days.
What about 200?
I actually have a family thing tomorrow.
My Aunt Lydia's having a barbeque.
Just tell me a number.
I don't want money.
Well, then what do you want?
Baby back ribs?
Look, the past couple
days have been a lot of fun.
Okay? Very Pretty Woman.
Or the edgy gender reversal sequel.
But I have paparazzi camped
outside my apartment right now.
Reporters are digging through my trash.
My name is a TMZ headline.
Well, only until the next
swipe in the Kimye-Taylor feud.
It's more than I signed up for, Fallon.
I'm a regular person.
I'm supposed to be at my
aunt's barbeque tomorrow.
So, I'm just gonna walk away slowly.
250.
- Here I go.
- Seriously?
You're just gonna walk away from 250K?
I can't afford not to.
Says something that he kept this.
Probably to spite me.
She's pretty.
I didn't come here to talk about Alexis.
I didn't mean anything, Blake.
We don't have to talk about her,
but I would like you to talk to me.
What do you want from me?
I let you talk me into coming here.
- Didn't I?
- Yes, but you're obviously in pain.
You don't have to just soldier through.
You don't have to be stoic, not for me.
You're allowed to be a regular person.
I'm not a regular person, Cristal.
Why you keep trying to make me into one?
What do you mean?
The way I run my business,
the way I protect my children,
the way I grieve for my father.
- That's not fair.
- No, it's not.
So why don't you stop?
You know who I am.
You knew when you married me.
It's why you married me.
That is not true.
Oh, come on!
You wear the clothes,
you drive the cars,
you drink the champagne.
It's just like Alexis.
- Wow.
- You signed the prenup.
Seven million for every year.
If that's not enough for you,
well, maybe you should just go.
I've been looking for you.
Generally,
when someone can't be located,
it's because they don't want to be.
Steven told me what happened.
Big move to smack your boss.
Well, it's not the first time.
When Blake was 11,
he was being insolent to his mother,
something along the lines of,
"Up your nose with a rubber hose."
Thomas was away on business,
but when he heard about it,
he insisted on a spanking by proxy.
Hey, man. Rich people are weird.
Mm.
So what are you having?
It's a 1907 Heidsieck &
Company Monopole champagne
from the Titanic,
salvaged from the bottom of the sea.
- That must be worth...
- Twice my annual salary, yes.
Thomas bought it at auction,
gave it to me,
said I should drink a toast
should the grim reaper ever come and
"bang him in the ass."
Do you want company?
I wouldn't object to tasting something
that has been so close to Leo DiCaprio.
You know, fictionally.
Unfortunately, I can't bring myself
to drink a toast to Thomas Carrington.
I thought you guys were tight.
We were.
But I've been contacting
his various female
companions to let them know
about his untimely demise.
Damn, plural?
I didn't recognize the last
number that he had dialed,
so I dialed it.
It was the Immigration and
Customs Enforcement hotline.
ICE?
He called ICE on me?
- I'm afraid so.
- Why?
Why would he do that?
I don't know.
Should've had Frank
change the back gate code.
Don't think the Carringtons
would be too happy
to have a Colby on their property,
after that mess of a wedding.
I just wanted to bring
you your stuff back.
It's not like you've
been taking my calls.
Why would I?
I also wanted to apologize
for misleading you.
I thought you were just
trying to make Fallon jealous.
Well, I was when it first started.
I had no idea what had really happened
between my dad and Blake.
But when I found out,
I had to choose a side.
But I shouldn't have misled you.
I lied to you.
I thought that I was protecting my dad,
but now Jeff has taken this
whole thing way too far.
It's like all he cares about is revenge.
Yeah, I think Fallon's
completely lost perspective.
Look, I'm sorry, too.
For what?
I lied to you.
Thought I was protecting Fallon.
Living around all this excess
starts to feel normal after a while.
Yeah. I want out.
I just don't know how.
Not even a first edition.
It's just like you.
All pomp, no substance.
I bet you didn't even read it.
_
Sit down, Thomas.
This is ridiculous.
I don't know why you're
making me do this.
Because someday,
Blake will need to hear it,
and you won't always
be around to tell him.
- This is stupid.
- Just do it.
I don't know why I have to say it.
Of course I love him.
He's my son.
That wasn't so hard, was it?
I'm sorry he didn't
say that to you in person.
He should have.
As for Alexis...
You never thought
you'd hear me say this.
I wish she were here.
Yes, hi. This is Cristal Carrington.
Jackie and I spoke this morning.
I'd like to make an appointment.
No, it's for me.
♪ Just remember ♪
♪ In the winter ♪
♪ Far beneath ♪
♪ The bitter snow ♪
♪ Lies the seed ♪
♪ That with the sun's love ♪
♪ In the spring ♪
♪ Becomes the rose. ♪
Do you think Grandpa is trolling us?
Maybe he loved Bette Midler.
I'm trying to give him
the benefit of the doubt.
Ugh. Don't sound so well-adjusted.
Don't worry.
I just had sex with my ex-girlfriend
to stop my boyfriend
from getting deported.
Ex-girlfriend? But you only had one.
- Mrs. Daniels?
- I think you mean Mrs. Robinson.
Well, who am I to judge?
I just asked the stranger
I paid to marry me
to come with me to Grandpa's funeral,
so I'm only slightly more sane.
We never had a fighting chance, did we?
Not like we had any real role models.
Oh, who?
Dad, the workaholic with rage issues
who can't discern the
potency of his own cologne?
Or Mom, who ditched us
before I ever had the emotional
vocabulary to describe her?
Am I interrupting?
No. We were just rehearsing our
loving musical tribute to Grandpa.
- Is everything okay?
- No.
No. I owe you both an apology,
both of you.
Have you been drinking?
Quite a bit, but I still mean it.
Steven, I'm sorry that I pushed
you into that charade with Ted.
I thought I was helping you,
helping your career,
but it is not worth
jeopardizing your integrity.
Uh, thank you.
And, Fallon...
I'm sorry I made you go
through with the wedding.
It should not be up to you
to protect our secrets,
my secrets.
This whole mess is my fault.
I went too far,
and I pushed you guys too far.
And I want you both to
know that I love you.
Whether or not you do what I say,
whether or not I disagree with you,
I never want you to doubt that.
Did you replace our
father with a cyborg?
No, it's me.
It's so lifelike.
I love you, too, Dad.
Don't worry, we won't tell anyone.
Okay. I love you, too, Cyborg Dad.
Okay.
I'm gonna get another round.
I... No, um...
There's one more thing I
need to talk to you about.
Sit down.
Cristal's been telling
me for a while now
that the Carrington Atlantic
brand could use some refreshing,
and I'm not signing the
Paris Agreement or anything,
but we could stand to "green"
our portfolio a little.
I wonder if Morell could fill the void.
I don't need you
swooping in to rescue me.
No, it's the other way around.
C.A. needs to step into the future,
not dwell in the past.
It's never too late to change, right?
Unless you're dead.
That is why you are
not doing the eulogy.
Carrington Atlantic surprised analysts
by announcing a production partnership
with the Morell Green
Energy Corporation.
Some saw the move as strategic
in the wake of an altercation
between Fallon Carrington
and her former partner Jeff Colby.
We need to talk.
You see that?
I had the whole thing under control.
The whole world can see
Fallon's getting bailed
out by her daddy.
She's a mess.
She's not the only one.
I'm not letting this crazy
feud continue anymore.
Mr. Colby?
Yes?
Is your father here?
What did you do?
What I should've done a long time ago.
I filed to take over Dad's guardianship.
I'm moving him to my place,
away from you and your
war with the Carringtons.
He's upstairs.
You can't be serious.
He'll never go along with it.
He's already agreed.
You're the one that put him in
danger with this stupid wedding.
And if you're not gonna look after him,
then I have to.
This is all for him.
I used to believe that.
But now I see that it was all for you.
So do what you need to do,
but you're on your own, Jeff.
Is this some kind of photo op?
No. Though you weren't kidding.
There are a lot of paparazzi out there.
- Yeah.
- I'm sorry about that.
You do realize that
showing up at my house
isn't really helping the situation,
right?
I know, but...
I just wanted to
apologize for everything.
Seemed kind of long for a text.
Maybe more like an e-mail situation.
But since you're here already,
might as well just go ahead and say it.
I'm sorry for wrecking your
life by tangling you up in mine.
I'm sorry for inviting you
to my grandpa's funeral.
I'm sorry for asking you to
marry me in the first place.
I mean, that's not really how
regular people do things, is it?
Well, regular people also don't agree
to marry complete strangers, either.
If there's a TLC show about it,
it's usually a red flag.
Well, I don't know any other way.
I mean, the Carrington impulse
is to throw money at a problem,
and then, when that doesn't work, lie.
Look, I'm sorry, too.
I imagine that's a pretty lonely
way to go through the world.
I'm just a rich girl standing
in front of a poor boy,
asking him to forgive her.
I don't know if I'm more
insulted by that or the fact
that you just completely
butchered Notting Hill.
Never seen it.
Here. I want you to have this.
It's our annulment papers.
You can file them,
and you can be rid of me
and my lunatic family forever.
Lucky you.
Oh, and, um...
have fun at your Aunt Lydia's.
Are you still interested in
tasting that fine champagne
I showed you before the funeral?
I thought you bailed on the toast.
Well, there are other things
we could toast to.
Leonardo DiCaprio, for one.
Be a shame to let such a
fine bottle go to waste.
Well, we'll pee it out in 30 minutes,
but I'll always toast to Leo.
If there are any other
expensive boozes you want to pawn off...
Don't push it.
What's going on? What's that?
An O-1 visa.
Yours, specifically.
How'd you get it?
Uh, family friend with a family friend.
"Extraordinary ability or achievement"?
It means you bring
something special to the United States.
And you do, especially to me.
Thank you.
So, to Thomas Carrington's...
friends in high places.
And to your new uncle.
Uncle Sam.
Thomas would've hated this.
I'll drink to that.
You got a pen?
I think so.
Look in my purse.
Jackie Littman?
- She was at the house.
- For Fallon.
Why do you have her card?
You leaving me?
Blake, please.
Before I've even buried my father?
You're worse than Alexis.
- You don't understand.
- I don't want to hear it!
Not now!
Would you just do me a favor
and play the grieving
daughter-in-law today.
Okay?
After all, I'm paying you enough.
You clean up well.
It's my grandfather's funeral.
Well, if you need to talk, or something.
Uh...
Uh, Melissa, this is Sam, my partner.
Hi.
- You know Mrs. Daniels.
- Yeah, sure.
Um, your husband is Mr...
Ah, hanging by a thread.
He hopes you, uh,
enjoy your time here in the U.S.
Uh, Paul Daniels helped get your visa.
Oh, my God, I didn't realize.
Thank you so much.
Um, I'd like to thank him, too.
Is he in there?
Oh, I'm sure he's around here somewhere.
But I'm sorry,
it must be sort of strange
to be commemorating the life of
a man who tried to ruin yours.
What are you talking about?
Uh, Steven,
are you supposed to be inside?
Oh, you didn't know.
When Paul was looking into his visa,
he found out that your grandfather's
the one that tipped off ICE.
He was a... a complicated man.
I'll see you inside.
Did you know?
Anders told me.
But I didn't want to ruin
your memory of your grandpa.
Steven?
They want to show you the organ.
Is everything all right?
Blake seemed upset when he walked in,
and not about his father.
Blake and I had a fight.
And he found Jackie Littman's
business card in my purse.
Now he's convinced I want a divorce.
And do you?
No. The opposite.
I called Jackie Littman to
change my end of the prenup.
- Excuse me?
- Every time Blake and I fight,
it's never on equal footing.
The money is always looming over me.
So I'm taking it out of the equation.
If that's what it takes
for Blake to believe that
I love him just for him,
I will happily do it.
Well, that sounds...
Stupid? Impulsive? Maybe.
But I'm not quitting on him.
And I'm not letting him quit on me.
I was gonna say "romantic."
If only Blake would let
me explain that to him.
He will.
Now, Mrs. Carrington,
let's get you down in the front,
where he can see you.
Looks like I haven't missed anything.
What are you doing here?
Well, I'm your husband, aren't I?
And I figured you could
use a friendly face today.
You do owe me some barbecue, though.
Okay, but you're paying.
Jack?
I didn't know you knew
Thomas Carrington.
Uh, sorry,
I think you have the wrong person.
You just look so familiar.
You're not John and Laura's boy?
Uh, sorry.
I'm so sorry for your loss.
Thank you all for coming today.
As you can see, my grandfather was
a man who liked to show
off our family's success.
But he saved his most generous gift
for the last day of his life.
That was the day he
finally gave me acceptance.
And today,
I'm choosing to celebrate that.
Sam.
_
_
_
_
_
Thank you, Steven,
for those, um... thoughtful words.
My father was an icon, a titan.
And if we're being honest,
he could be a real piece of work.
Which is why I never thought
I'd be speaking about love
at his funeral.
Just wasn't a feeling that
I associated with him.
I mistakenly thought
that the only thing that
he loved was his job.
Until yesterday.
Yesterday, I discovered that
he had gone out of his way
to make sure that I knew
exactly what he loved.
He loved buying rare
and expensive treasures
for his closest friends.
He loved listening to
his grandchildren sing.
And he loved me.
Death itself
can be very jarring.
However, the clarity that it brings
is remarkable.
Magnificent, even.
You think you know someone,
and then something happens
that changes everything forever.
Today is that day for me.
I can never unknow what I now know.
The writing is on the wall.
And so, today...
Oh, my God.
That's my mother.
Sorry I'm late.
Traffic was a bitch.
by LiviuBoss