Drop Dead Diva (2009–2014): Season 6, Episode 7 - Sister Act - full transcript

See that aspiring model there?

That's me... Deb... until the day I died.

I thought I'd go straight to heaven,

but there was a bit of a mix-up,

and I woke up in someone else's body.

- [Screams]
- So now I'm Jane,

a super-busy lawyer with
my very own assistant.

I got a new life, a new wardrobe,

and the only people who really
know what's going on with me

are my girlfriend Stacy
and my guardian angel, Paul.

I used to think everything
happened for a reason.



Whoo! [Laughs]

Now, I sure hope I was right.

♪ La, La, La,
La-La-La-La ♪

♪ Sunshine ♪

♪ I'm just so happy you're ♪

♪ You're mine, oh, mine ♪

♪ Do, do-do
do-do ♪

♪ Do, do,
do-do do-do ♪

Good morning.

Yes, it is.

So, last night was...

Yes, it was.

[Chuckles]

So, I made breakfast.



Uh, half a grapefruit,
toast, and three-minute eggs

can be ready in, well,
three minutes. [Chuckles]

I wish I could stay, but I
got to get home and change,

and I'm still gonna be late for work.

Or...

you could show up in yesterday's clothes

and let the whole office
know you got lucky.

I love you.

What?

Oh. [Chuckling] I didn't say anything.

[Chuckles] Oh.

Sorry. Um, have a great day.

You, too.

[Door closes]

Stace.

Good morning.

Good morning to you.
What are you doing here?

I left the house early

because I wanted you and
Grayson to have some space.

Oh.

- But now I want details.
- Oh.

And keep it clean in
case my babies can hear.

Okay.

[Giggles]

It was amazing.

He was amazing, but I was amazing.

[Giggles]

But...

But?

Um...

You know what? I'm sure it's nothing.

[Chuckles] Oh, no, no, no, no.

I am not leaving here
until you explain the "But."

As Grayson was leaving this morning,

I may have said "I love you."

Oh. It's... it's too soon for that.

I know.

It's ju... back before I died,

when Grayson and I were living together,

I said it to him every morning
as he was leaving for work.

It just... it just slipped out.

What did he say back?

"What?"

I said what did he say back?

Stace, he literally said "What?"

- Oh.
- You know what?

- Maybe he just didn't hear me.
- I see.

Do you think I'm delusional?

I think that you came back
to life after you died,

so anything is possible.

I got to go. I have prenatal yoga.

[Sighs]

Yes, Morgan, I know that Katy
Perry tickets are hard to get,

but I will pay you double if
you watch Noah on Friday night.

Triple?

[Sighs] Fine, enjoy the concert.

I know someone who could watch Noah.

Well, they'd have to be super
reliable and know infant CPR.

I once played a sexy nurse

in a corporate sexual-harassment video.

[Chuckles] I don't think so.

I can make a diaper out of a napkin,

I know breast milk can stay at
room temperature for six hours,

and I've read at least
a dozen parenting books.

I don't believe in parenting books.

Really?

Well, what would you do

if little Noah swallowed rat poison?

[Sighs] I would call 911.

Wrong answer.

By the time you reach a 911 operator,

they would transfer you
to poison-control center,

wasting valuable minutes,

and poor Noah could be
foaming at the mouth.

Instead, call the 800
number, that I have memorized,

and your baby will be just fine.

Now, would you like to
drop Noah off at my house?

We'll be there at 6:00.

But make sure there's no
rat poison in the house.

Three months ago, Laura
was diagnosed with leukemia.

Her only course of treatment
is a bone marrow transplant.

We've been looking for a donor,
but finding a match isn't easy.

I'm so sorry.

Unfortunately, no one on my
side of the family is compatible.

What about your dad?

My mom went to a fertility clinic.

He was an anonymous sperm donor.

How can I help you?

When our church heard about Laura,

some of the congregates
volunteered to get tested.

Against the odds, we
found the perfect match,

and the woman agreed to help us.

Great.

Then last night, she sent me an e-mail.

"I'm sorry, but I've changed my mind.

Your daughter is in my prayers."

For three weeks, we thought this
woman was going to save Laura's life,

and then [Voice breaking] the
night before the procedure,

she...

It's okay, mom.

Do you know why this woman backed out?

On Facebook, she posted
she's going to Hawaii Tuesday.

Procedure would take a
week to recover from, so...

So, she is picking sand
and surf over your daughter.

It's disgusting.

What is this woman's name?

Sister Sally-Anne Frankle.

She's a nun?

Okay, Cindy, when sister agreed
to donate her bone marrow,

did you stop looking for other matches?

Yes. She was committed to help Laura.

Well, in that case,

Sister Sally-Anne can say aloha to Hawaii,

'cause we're taking this nun to court.

Madam Mayor, on the phone,
you said it was an emergency.

If my hunch is correct, you
need a campaign contribution.

I wish I was here to shake you down,

but I think that my
fundraising days are over.

I'm being impeached.

The Malibu City Council's
holding a hearing this evening.

What the hell did you do?

I gave away city hall...

literally.

You gave it away... the whole building?

Last month, a fire burned
down a public school in Oxnard.

They don't have the money to rebuild,

so they were forcing 700
kids into crowded trailers

without air-conditioning with
porta-potties as bathrooms.

I mean, the conditions were deplorable.

So, as mayor of Malibu, I
decided to lease city hall

to the Oxnard school district

for $1 a month for the next three years.

Well, that is lovely and insane.

There are five councilman offices,

each large enough to hold a classroom.

You throw in the support staff facilities,

city hall will make an
awesome temporary high school.

I relocated government
personnel to the library annex.

Students are from Oxnard, not from Malibu.

Children are children.

It does not matter where they live.

Ellie, I've known you since college.

You have always been a small-government,
big-business politician,

not exactly known as a woman of the people.

Let's just say I've turned over a new leaf.

Will you represent me at
the impeachment hearing?

Of course. Absolutely.

Um... officially, what are the charges?

Improper disposal of city assets.

And if I'm impeached,
they can revoke the lease.

It doesn't go into effect until
the end of business tomorrow.

There are five voting members
on the council, including you,

and you need a majority to
win. How many votes do you have?

Other than me, Councilwoman
Abrams... the lone liberal.

Ellie, it's time to play politics.

Your honor, we're asking that
you compel Sister Sally-Anne

to honor her written donor contract.

Your honor, Miss Bingum is
asking for specific performance,

a remedy that's not available,

in a contract involving
a medical procedure.

I agree.

I don't have the authority to compel anyone

to undergo elective surgery,
even if it saves a life.

Under normal circumstances,
I would totally agree,

but Laura relied on
Sister Sally-Anne's promise

that she would go through
with this procedure.

Laura's out of options,
and she's out of time,

and that is prima facie
detrimental reliance.

I can't force someone to
give up her bone marrow.

Your only remedy would be financial.

Fine.

Then in that case, we are
suing for $100 million.

[Chuckles] That's ridiculous.

Your honor, we're not interested

in Sister Sally-Anne's money.

But if the only way I can get
Sister Sally-Anne on that stand

is to sue for financial damages,

then that's exactly what I'm gonna do.

Sister, please come on up.

Sister, you're aware,
based on your promise,

that Laura discontinued her
search for another donor.

Yes.

And I'm very sorry.

And you know that she will likely die

without this transplant.

Yes.

But... but I have no choice.

So, going to Hawaii to watch sunsets

rather than saving Laura's
life isn't a choice?

Objection, your honor... harassment.

But for this woman's broken promise,

Laura would've had time
to find an alternate donor.

She relied on a nun's
word, and now she could die.

Are religious women permitted to lie?

- Objection.
- Sustained.

Miss Bingum, you are out of line.

The reason I can't donate
my bone marrow is because...

I'm pregnant.

[Spectators murmurs]

What?

I just found out.

And my doctor won't sign off
on the bone marrow donation

because the procedure's a risk to my baby.

The baby's father is
a member of our parish.

And we haven't told anyone
that I'm renouncing my vows.

His family lives in Hawaii,

and that's why I'm going there next week.

I'm sorry.

[Sniffles]

[Crying] I am so sorry.

I'm sorry.

Councilman Andrews, impeaching
Ellie is a bit extreme.

She gave away city hall, man.

She didn't even call a council vote.

As mayor, she is allowed
to act without the council

in an emergency.

Oxnard's kids aren't Malibu's problem.

It is that kind of narrow-minded
thinking, Andy, that...

Wouldn't you like to
avoid the negative stigma

of removing your mayor?

I mean, can't we come to
some sort of agreement?

Oh, you want to make
a deal? How about this?

I call off the vote, and
you support my proposal

to move the beach access point
of Big Rock to Eagle Point.

His beachfront house is at Big Rock.

He just want greater privacy
at the taxpayers' expense.

That'll cost $400,000.
I'll never support it.

Then I'm calling a vote.

- [Sighs]
- Please take your seats.

The impeachment vote will
commence in 60 seconds.

Thank you for trying, Owen.

Hang on.

Councilman Hodge. Hi.

Name a project... any project...
and the mayor will support you.

[Sighs] The breakwater needs to be rebuilt.

You know that will decimate the kelp beds.

You only favor that

because you're on the
board of the yacht club.

We need a deal, Ellie.

For the kids.

Okay, fine.

We have a deal.

- [Elevator bell dings]
- Miss Bingum.

Oh, hi.

We just got your message. What's going on?

Our best chance for finding
a donor match for Laura

is with a close relative, correct?

Yes, but we've tested all my relatives.

Now, about Laura's biological father.

The only thing we know about
him is his donor ID number.

I tracked that ID to Westwood Fertility.

I asked them for more information,

but, of course, they refused.

So, w-we're taking them to court?

It's a long shot, but it's worth a try.

Okay.

Come on.

We are asking to compel Westwood Fertility

to disclose the name of
Laura's biological father.

Per Ms. Dwyer's contract,

the identity of the biological father

may not be disclosed for any reason.

Your honor, we're talking
about a young woman's life.

I am urging the court to
do the right thing here.

Confidentiality is the bedrock
of anonymous sperm donation.

I'm afraid I agree,

which is why I'm denying
your motion, Miss Bingum.

Wait. Wait. Wait, wait. Hold on.

There's nothing in the contract
that says Westwood Fertility

can't notify the donor directly.

What are you getting at?

I am asking that you
compel Westwood Fertility

to contact Laura's biological father

and inform him of her condition.

Then it's his choice to
reveal himself or not.

That's nothing more than an
end-run around the contract.

True, but where's the harm?

I'm ordering Westwood Fertility

to give me the name of
Laura's biological father.

To ensure neutrality,
I will place that call.

Thank you.

And just to remind the
court, this is time-sensitive.

As soon as I have his answer,
my clerk will alert all parties.

[Sighs]

Kids start school on Monday.

I've ordered the department of public works

to start moving the furniture this weekend.

Ellie, you are fearless
lately. I'm impressed.

- Thank you.
- [Cellphone beeps]

- [Sighs] Damn it.
- What?

An emergency council meeting
is being called for tonight,

and the agenda is my impeachment... again.

Peter's vote, we have the majority.

Peter cornered me after
the hearing yesterday

to sign his breakwater proposal,
and I told him to go to hell.

You... We had a deal, Ellie.

The breakwater proposal

would've caused real environmental damage.

Going back on your word
is political suicide.

I don't care. I mean, the
truth is... I'm dead already.

What are you talking about?

I'm dying.

I've been having stomach pains,

and I went to the doctor last week.

I have pancreatic cancer.

Oh, Ellie.

I've made my peace with it.

But I have to do right by these kids.

I want this to be my legacy.

I mean, there's...

there's nothing I can
do about the vote, but...

you will not be alone in that meeting.

Thank you.

Oh, Jane.

Have you seen Grayson?

No, why?

Uh, it's nothing.

Trouble in paradise?

I just said it was nothing.
Just haven't seen him all day.

What do you want? I'm
on my way to visit Teri.

- In the slammer?
- Yeah, Kim.

In the slammer.

She'll be out tomorrow.

Well, good, because I want to
discuss her termination with you.

Now, I know you guys are all buddy-buddy.

So if it's easier for
you, I can drop the hammer.

What are you talking about?

She went to jail for
impersonating an attorney.

You didn't think we were
taking her back, did you?

I plan on giving her a
firm slap on the wrist.

Okay, well, if you don't fire her, I will.

Give her my best.

♪ They put me away ♪

Am I hearing music?

Some would call it that.

♪ Jane, they put me away ♪

[Cheers and applause]

That song was called "They put me away,"

and my next performance will be

10 minutes before final bed checks,

and I do accept cigarettes and
chocolate in lieu of applause.

Thank you.

They loved you.

I know. I finally found my audience.

Only you could figure out
a way to rock out in prison.

[Chuckles] That being said,

I've got 15 hours and 7
minutes left in this hell hole.

I never thought I'd be so
excited to go back to work.

Yeah.

Well, everyone misses you.

Even Kim? I thought
she'd try to get me fired.

No. No, she understands.

People make mistakes. You know?

Listen, I just came by quickly.

I've actually got to get back to court.

No worries. I have to rehearse.

Tonight I'm singing "Cell Block Tango"

from "Chicago," the musical,

and if I don't hit the high
notes, the crowd will riot.

All right, well, listen,

I will be here tomorrow
when you are released.

- Thanks, boss.
- Bye.

Let the record reflect

that I have spoken with Laura
Dwyer's biological father.

I explained the situation.

He has declined the plaintiff's request.

No. No.

Um... Your honor, would it be
possible for me to speak to him?

Perhaps I can convey the urgency of...

Miss Bingum, I stressed the
serious nature of the situation.

Unfortunately, he is resolute
in his desire to stay anonymous.

I'm sorry.

I'm asking this council
to vote "Yes" on my motion

for the mayor's impeachment

and the rescission of her ridiculous lease.

Stop the theatrics, Peter.

You're just upset that I didn't
support your breakwater deal.

Suddenly you care about
the environment, Ellie?

You spearheaded that seaside strip mall

that every environmental group opposed.

I now realize that that was a mistake.

Madam Mayor, may I suggest
that you call a vote

on the current measure... your impeachment?

Excuse me, we have a protocol for comment.

- You can fill out a form...
- I am the mayor's attorney.

Pursuant to chapter six of the brown act,

I am permitted to offer her council,

and I am urging her to call a vote now.

We have to wait for Councilman Andrews.

No, we don't.

Malibu municipal code, section 20.8,

mandates that all council
meetings start at 7:00 P.M.

It is now 7:03.

So, let's do this.

All those in favor of my impeachment

and the voiding of the lease,
please raise your hands.

All against.

Let the record reflect

that the vote is two in
favor and two against.

The measure fails. This
meeting is adjourned.

[Indistinct conversations]

Sweetie, have you spoken with Grayson yet?

No. Actually, I haven't seen him

since he left the house yesterday morning.

Oh, so he's avoiding you?

No. No.

I-I don't... I don't think he is.

I mean, maybe he is.

Oh, God, Grayson's avoiding me.

No, no, no, no.

Before we jump to
conclusions, answer me this.

The last time you had sex with
Grayson in your other body,

how did he act?

He sent me flowers and
texted me all day long.

[Chuckles]

Nothing. Not even a smiley face.

- Yeah.
- Damn it.

God, why?

Why did I blurt out, "I love you"?

Oh, you were in the moment.
You can't blame yourself.

I know, but the first
time you say the "L" word

is so important.

Timing is everything.

Just like Risotto.

Exactly like Risotto,

and in this case, I burned the pan.

Mm, can I take you out for
drinks, maybe cheer you up?

No. No, I got to work.

This 14-year-old girl needs
a bone marrow transplant.

Oh, here. I'll show you.

[Chuckles]

See, her name is Laura, and
her likes are rollerblading,

reading the "Divergent"
books, and lipstick.

Huh.

Her only hope is her sperm-donor dad,

and he won't reveal himself.

It's really sad.

Jane, there's a good chance
of a bone marrow match

with a half brother or sister, right?

Yeah, but she's an only child.

Well, remember

when I considered using an anonymous donor?

- Mm-hmm.
- My first choice was unavailable

because he had already fathered
20 children... the legal limit.

So, what if Laura's father is popular?

Yeah, she could have up to
19 half siblings out there,

but the fertility clinic
won't share that information.

Sweetie, there's an online registry

that matches children with
their biological fathers

- using the donor's ID Number.
- What?

Yeah, it was started by kids

who wanted to meet their genetic siblings

but didn't know their father's name.

Do you happen to know
Laura's dad's donor ID?

Yes. Yes, I do.

DX785.

Look at that.

Laura has at least one half
brother and two half sisters.

Stacy, you're amazing.

- I know.
- [Chuckles]

[Both chuckle]

That was a piece of luck, huh,
Andy Andrews not showing up?

Andy is a surfer with a trust fund.

He's probably shredding
a swell at Point Dume.

You know they're gonna call
another emergency meeting

and impeach you tomorrow night?

Yes, but the lease will have gone through,

and the kids will have a proper school.

- Cheers, Ellie.
- Cheers.

You know, I always thought that
you and I would end up together.

Ah. I asked you out at least a dozen times.

You always said no.

Because I wasn't ready
for something serious.

Plus I knew that you
were marriage material.

I guess that's flattering. [Chuckles]

I hope there's someone
special in your life.

Actually, uh...

I think I found the one.

I just... I mean, I-I hope that
she feels the same way about me,

but... The situation is complicated.

[Knock on door] Excuse me.

I have a warrant for Mayor Chapin's arrest.

On what charges?

Kidnapping of Councilman Andy Andrews.

[Laughs] That's ridiculous.

Well, Mr. Andrews claims

that she invited him over to
her home to discuss a deal,

and then she locked him in her wine cellar.

Cleaning woman just let
him out about an hour ago.

I couldn't let him impeach me.

So you locked him in a wine cellar?

No, don't answer that question.
I'll meet you at the station.

Let's go.

Don't say anything.

I have three half siblings?

At least three.

See, only a fraction of
the sperm-donor offspring

are registered on this site.

Have you contacted them, Miss Bingum?

Yes, and her half brother
and one of her half sisters

are getting their blood drawn today.

I called the lab. They said that

they would expedite the matching process.

How can we ever thank you?

- Mom, I don't feel so good.
- Honey, what's wrong?

I'm dizzy.

Laura?

Laura?

Oh, my God.

Laura?

I'll call the ambulance.

Laura?

[Woman speaking indistinctly over PA]

I spoke with her doctor.

Her white count is skyrocketing.

[Voice breaking] He said we have days tops.

Okay, Cindy, just try to stay strong.

We should know about her
half siblings very soon.

Okay?

Um, one moment, please.

Grayson, what are you doing here?

Well, I've been trying to reach
you, but your phone was off.

Oh. Yeah.

Listen, I'm... I'm really glad to see you.

Um, to be honest, I-I was thinking

that maybe you're... avoiding me.

What?

Um... Never mind.

Well, a young woman named Becky Hollis

called the office for you.

Great.

Becky is one of my clients' half siblings.

What did she say?

That she's headed to the
office to speak with you.

Okay, thank you.

I just heard Ellie Chapin was arrested

for trapping a surfer in her cellar.

Yeah. Did you also hear she's dying?

Cancer.

No.

God, I'm sorry.

Going through her medical records

so that I can argue compassionate release

and get her out of jail.

You'll have to prove she's terminally ill.

Yeah, you'd think that would be easy.

So, what's the problem?

[Sighs]

In her medical files, her
doctor references her CT scan,

but then when I click on the link,

it goes to some other patient's CT.

Carlos Garcia.

It's got to be a glitch
in the system or something.

What if it's not a glitch?

I don't follow.

Let me see. On the doctor's report,

the C.T. scan has a
patient reference number.

X12955B.

What's the number on Carlos Garcia's scan?

Oh, my God, it's the same.

I don't understand.

You're saying that I'm not sick?

We found a discrepancy
in your medical records.

I confirmed it with the hospital.

- Are you sure?
- Positive.

It was a clerical mistake.
You don't have cancer.

You do have an ulcer,

which would explain the
pains in your stomach.

But I'm not dying?

No! No, you're gonna live a long time.

Now for the bad news.

You're facing 20 years in
jail for felony kidnapping,

and since you're not dying,

I can't argue compassionate release.

Is there anything you can do?

Yes.

We are gonna argue temporary insanity...

that the... the fear of death
made you unable to understand

the nature of your actions.

If you argue temporary insanity,

the council will say that
I was mentally incapacitated

when I leased out city hall.

That will give them grounds
to rescind the lease.

Yes, it's true.

You have to find another way.

Dead or alive, I'm not
letting those kids down.

That means I need to get
back to work, Madam Mayor.

Owen.

Yeah.

We only tell ourselves
things are complicated

when we're scared.

What? [Chuckles]

That woman... you said she was the one.

Act on it.

Trust me.

It is better to regret something you do

than to regret something you don't do.

Becky, I just spoke with the lab,

and you and Laura are a match.

[Gasps] [Chuckles]

Now the big question.

- Will you consent?
- Yes!

Yes, I want to help Laura.

Okay, great.

I'll set you up with
her doctor immediately.

And that's when I can meet Laura?

Yeah.

What the hell is going on here?

Mom.

How dare you meet with my
child without my consent.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Ms. Hollis, Becky's 18,

so she doesn't need your permission.

She's 16.

I thought you said you were 18.

I really want to help Laura,

and I knew my mom would try and stop me.

Sweetheart, I won't sign
off on the procedure.

- There's too many risks.
- Hold on.

Becky would've needed your permission

to get tested as a match,

so obviously, you agreed to that.

At the time,

I wasn't aware that the
procedure was so invasive.

Please, mom.

I won't change my mind.

We're leaving. Now.

I'm so sorry, Miss Bingum.

Stay away from my daughter.

I'm not crazy.

He looks like George Clooney, doesn't he?

Spitting image.

Now, listen up. Here's Noah's sleep song.

Listen carefully.

♪ Noah, you're going to Harvard ♪

♪ It's the only place for you ♪

♪ You'll take the bar
and be a big star ♪

♪ And buy me a condo in Aspen ♪

Yay, mommy!

Putting a lot of pressure on him, huh?

Make sure you sing at least
three choruses, or he'll cry.

And remember, his milk
has to be body temperature,

or he gets gas.

Cold milk equals baby farts. Got it.

You sure you're up for this?

Aw, piece of cake.

And according to Jane,

you could really use a night
out and a good, stiff drink.

Okay.

- You two have fun.
- [Chuckles]

Bye, baby.

You hear that, Noah? We're
gonna be best buds, huh?

[Door closes, Noah crying]

Miss Bingum.

Becky, you can't be here.

I just want to know, were
there any other matches?

Sadly, no.

Then I want to do it.

Listen to me, you need
your mother's permission,

and I-I shouldn't even be speaking to you.

I read online that... that
if I file for emancipation,

I can donate my bone marrow
without my mom's permission.

Okay, that's... that's true.

- Can you represent me?
- No.

Given that I represent Laura,
that's a conflict of interest.

You know what?

Stay here.

And I'm gonna get you a lawyer.

Grayson.

There is a young woman in my office

who needs immediate representation.

Can you help her?

- Yeah, of course.
- Thank you.

Where are you going?

Teri gets out of jail in half an hour,

and I'm gonna go pick her up.

And then I have to fire her.

[Noah crying]

♪ I know a boy named Noah ♪

Come on. Stop crying.

Oh! Look!

Ooh, look! Mommy's milk.

- Do you...
- [Knock on door]

You've got to be kidding!

[Groans]

Hey.

Uh, Jane's not here, and I'm really busy.

No, no. I wanted to see you.

There's something I want to tell you.

Okay, just come in.

Uh, can I use your arm for a second?

Does that feel like body temperature?

Did you just squirt me
with Kim's breast milk?

- Maybe.
- Oh!

Look, he won't stop crying!

And I have tried all of Kim's tricks,

and I even put on the Kenny G. album.

- That always puts me off.
- Relax. Relax.

I got this. Hey, buddy. Hey, buddy.

I know the floor could
be cleaner, but really?

No, the vacuum acts as
white noise to the baby.

[Crying stops]

My mom had one on the
first five years of my life.

Dog was miserable, but I was happy.

There we go. [Chuckles]

[Voice breaking] You're my hero.

[Sighs]

[Baby coos]

I'm free.

[Both chuckle]

I didn't think you'd be so happy.

Yesterday, you made jail look like a party.

A party involves shirtless
men and margaritas.

I did make some friends,

and I definitely honed my guitar
skills, but this was jail, Jane.

God, you poor thing.

I never fully appreciated
the office's open floor plan

until last week.

I can't wait to get back to work.

Oh, right. Yeah.

But you know what?

You've been through such
a traumatic experience,

I think you should just
take the day off tomorrow.

In fact, I am going to send you
to the four seasons spa, on me.

I'm totally gonna see naked celebrities.

You are the best boss ever. [Chuckles]

Hey, thanks for helping
out with Noah last night.

Oh, no. No. It's nothing.

And don't underestimate
Stacy. She did all the work.

Sure she did.

Now, let's talk about your case.

You want to help me figure out
how to get Ellie out of jail?

Nope, I'm far more interested

in suing the hospital on her behalf.

After all, they told a perfectly
healthy woman she was gonna die.

Under Gregory V. Tenet Health Care,

we have precedent for a major suit.

Kim...

you may have helped me
get Ellie out of jail.

I was talking about the hospital.

How does that help with jail?

In the words of Leonardo Da Vinci,

everything connects to everything else.

In the words of Kim Kaswell,

just make sure we get a
big-ass contingency fee.

All right.

Councilman Andrews, I'd like
you to meet the in-house council

for St. Mary's hospital.

I don't understand why you called me here.

Of course. Uh, let me explain.

- You're here for a three-way.
- Excuse me?

Not what you're thinking.

My client has just filed a major claim

against St. Mary's for gross negligence.

Now, if Ellie takes this to a jury,

your client could be
facing millions in damages.

But I'm a reasonable man.

I'd like to come up with
an alternate solution.

I'm all for that.

Now, Mr. Andrews, you have alerted the DA

that you'd like to press
charges against Ellie

for locking you in a wine cellar?

Damn right I'm pressing charges.

Ellie says she is very sorry

and she hopes you enjoyed the
2008 Caymus reserved cabernet

that she left open for you.

I still don't understand
why we're both here.

My client is willing to drop
the suit against the hospital

if the hospital is willing
to pay for the relocation

of the beach access point near your home...

something I know you want very badly.

What will that cost the hospital?

$400,000.

That's a bargain, given the circumstances.

My client can do that.

Assuming Mr. Andrews instructs the DA

to drop the case against Ellie.

Dude, she kidnapped me.

As a politician,

isn't it better to appear
forgiving than vindictive?

Plus, you'll up your
property value in the process.

Ellie would have to resign immediately.

But the city hall lease to
the Oxnard school district

remains intact.

We have a deal.

Fantastic.

Thank you, gentlemen.

Have a good day.

I've carefully considered this decision,

and I want to be emancipated.

Your honor, we're asking this court

to issue a declaration of emancipation

under section 7002C of
the California family code.

On behalf of Becky's parents,
we oppose the emancipation.

We contend that Becky is being
manipulated by her counsel,

employed by the same firm
representing Laura Dwyer.

I'm not counsel to the Dwyer family,

as my firm has erected a Chinese wall.

I have no problem with
that. The witness is yours.

Becky, are you fully employed?

No, I'm a junior in high school.

Under the law, an emancipated minor

must be able to support herself.

I've spoken to Mrs. Dwyer.

She's agreed to support
Becky until she's of age.

In other words, she's paying
for your client's bone marrow,

which is illegal.

Hold on. That's not it.

And if your client won't
support her own daughter,

my client's mother is happy to step in.

Enough.

Mr. Kent, the law is not on your side here.

Despite your client's good intentions,

I'm denying your motion.

Teri,

you've been the greatest assistant,

and more than that, you're
one of my dearest friends.

But I'm afraid...

Teri, this just isn't working.

It's ju... it's not you, it's me.

Miss Bingum.

Where the hell is my daughter?

What? What are you talking about?

After court, I dropped Becky off at school.

Only the school called to
tell me she never showed up.

I swear, I don't know where she is.

You expect me to believe you? [Scoffs]

I tell you to stay away from her,

and then you get another lawyer

to convince her to emancipate from me?

She came here on her own.

Ms. Dwyer just texted me.
Becky's at the hospital.

No, the judge prohibited her

from going through with the procedure.

I know. I suggest you head over there.

Becky.

- Mom.
- You're coming home with me now.

I want to get to know
Laura, and you can't stop me.

Ms. Hollis... I understand

you won't let your daughter
donate her bone marrow.

And I'm not mad. Honest.

But...

can she stay with me for
a little while longer?

I assumed you knew Becky was here.

Otherwise, I would've had her call you.

I'm sorry.

No, it's... it's fine.

There's no reason to apologize.

Becky, honey, stay here
as long as you want.

[Both chuckle]

Are you okay?

They're sisters.

Yeah.

They even look alike.

They do.

Becky. [Clears throat] Sweetheart.

Can I talk to you in the hall?

I'll be right back.

Thank you, mom!

Thank you, mom!

I-I can do it.

We can do it.

[Cries]

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you for saving my daughter.

Thank you.

It's a good deal...

I mean except for the part
about you stepping down as mayor.

If it's Andrews, he wouldn't budge.

Owen, I'm not dying, and you
kept the city hall lease intact.

Life is good.

There's something else, Ellie.

Okay.

Turns out the head of the DNC
was impressed with your actions.

He thinks you'd be the perfect candidate

for the open seat in congress.

[Chuckles]

Owen, that's my dream.

Well, put on your dancing shoes, Ellie,

'cause you're about to
Waltz on the national stage.

Teri.

Hi.

I thought I gave you the day off.

You did, but the sauna
at the spa was so small,

I was having prison flashbacks.

You know what? Maybe you
should take a few more days off.

Just till you feel more like a civilian.

I've seen "Orange Is the New Black,"

and there is a huge adjustment
period after leaving the clink.

- Jane, the thing is...
- Has Kim seen you yet?

- No, not yet. Why?
- Oh, not important.

Now can I please take you out for coffee

so we can catch up properly?

Jane, I'm not coming back to work.

- Just not yet.
- What? Why?

I really loved performing in prison,

and one of the guards...

this hot piece of booty named
Vinny... put my show online.

And today, I got a call
from three state pens

wanting to book me.

There's even a maximum
security in Texarkana

where the Aryan Sisterhood made
a soap sculpture of my bosom.

I really think I need to follow my passion.

Well, I'm... I'm so happy for you.

I-I... I'll miss you terribly, but...

I just need one month off. Is that okay?

Yes. Absolutely. One month.

Oh, thank you.

I'm gonna dedicate the first
song of every set to you.

[Chuckles] Okay.

And I can stay for the rest
of the day if you need me to.

No, no, no, no, no, no. It's
okay. You go follow your passion.

I'll be here when you get back.

Kim.

I just told Teri that she
is taking a leave of absence

for two weeks.

I know you wanted me to fire
her, but I'm a partner here,

and I think that two
weeks is a fair compromise.

I will not budge.

Two weeks is hardly a time-out.

One month, or I'll terminate her entirely.

[Sighs]

Under protest, I accept these terms.

Fine.

- Owen.
- Hey.

Why are we meeting at a
bar? You know I can't drink.

No. The drink is for me.

Um, there's something
that I wanted to tell you

when I came over yesterday.

If you're gonna tell
me that you're balding,

I can't get anywhere near you.

Propecia is not good for the babies.

What?

N... My hair is like a beaver pelt.

Mm.

Owen, you're making me
nervous. What's going on?

Okay, look.

I understand that if we date,
life could get complicated.

I get it. But... life is short, you know?

And while I respect your wishes
and the reasons behind them...

[Sighs]

I'm sorry, but I'm gonna have to fight you.

You're going to fight me?

I want to be with you.

And I swear on my life

I will never do anything
to hurt our children or you.

And... and if you don't feel the same way,

you just say so, but...

- Owen.
- Yeah?

You had me at vacuum cleaner.

[Chuckles]

Any word on Laura?

Yeah, I just got off the
phone with her mother.

The procedure is done,
both girls are in recovery.

Thank you so much for your help with this.

Cases like these are why I became a lawyer.

We saved that girl's life.

Yeah, we did.

You know, I'm not quite sure
why Jane became a lawyer.

But I'm so glad she did.

Yeah.

Well, it's been a long day.

I should get home.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, have a good night.

- Just, uh, one more thing.
- What's that?

I love you, too.

♪ I will leave this
better than I found it ♪

♪ There's too much smoke to see it ♪

♪ There's too much broke to feel this ♪

♪ I love you, I love you ♪