Drop Dead Diva (2009–2014): Season 5, Episode 2 - The Real Jane - full transcript

See that aspiring model there?

That's me... Deb...
until the day I died.

I thought I'd go straight to heaven,

but there was a bit of a mix-up,

and I woke up in someone else's body.

[ Screams ]

So now I'm Jane,

a super-busy lawyer
with my very own assistant.

I got a new life, a new wardrobe,

and the only people who really
know what's going on with me

are my girlfriend Stacy
and my guardian angel, Paul.



I used to think everything
happened for a reason.

Whoo! [ Laughs ]

Now, I sure hope I was right.

Drop Dead Diva 5x02 - The Real Jane
Original air date June 30, 2013

Previously on Drop Dead Diva...

Excuse me, Fred?

Oh!

You're old Jane.

You are the one
who sent Deb back into my body.

How did she do it?

Was it one of these buttons right here?

Do I need to call security?

Oh, it's the return button.

[ Computer chimes ]



No! No! [ Groans ]

So old Jane's soul
went into Owen's body.

Owen never died.

Jane's soul was never inside of him.

Yeah, I just figured that out.
So, where is old Jane?

That's the thing.

We don't really know.

You, uh, may want to carry pepper spray.

[ Knock on door ]

Oh, hi.

I thought you were someone else.

It's me... the real Jane.

And I want my life back.

[ Sighs ]

Good morning.

- Where have you been?
- Ugh.

I worked late at the pakery,
and I fell asleep.

Why? What's wrong?

I swear I didn't eat your yogurt.

Stacy, old Jane... is back.

What?!

Yes. She was here in this house.

I don't understand.

If her soul was up there

and her body is right there,
whose body is her soul in now?

Apparently, a ditzy lingerie model

was practicing her catwalk on the pier.

She slipped on a mackerel,
hit her head on the tackle box.

She flatlines.

Old Jane's soul goes into her body.

This kind of thing doesn't happen.

Do you remember what happened to me?

Right. Okay.

She accused me of stealing her life

and then destroying everything
she cared about.

Ugh! You fixed her split ends

and got her mom into therapy.

She should kiss your feet.

I know, right? [ Cellphone rings ]

- Mm-hmm.
- Oh.

[ Beep ] Huh.

Hello?

Okay.

Okay.

Fine.

That was her.

She was at my office.

Well, which she called her office,

and I guess she wants to see me.

Tell her she can't have
her Porsche back.

[ High-pitched voice ] Hey, stud.

Can I help you?

[ Normal voice ] Dude, it's me... Cyd.

Cyd Pinar, from basketball league.

- Holy crap. Cyd.
- I know.

Crazy get-up, right?
I came straight from work.

You're a drag queen?

No, I'm a mattress salesman.

I'm lost.

A few weeks ago,
I lost a bet to a co-worker.

I had to show up to work like this.

I had my best sales day ever.

So I started working in drag,

and now I'm selling more
mattresses than I ever imagined.

- Your wife's okay with it?
- You kidding?

My salary is based on commission.

I keep this up,

we're gonna be sending our kids
to private school

and going to Hawaii for Christmas.

Why would more people buy
a mattress from you in drag

than in normal clothing?

No one trusts a mattress salesman.

But they trust a drag queen?

When I start talking about
innerspring coils,

my customers' eyes glaze over.

But like this, I'm no longer
a 6-foot-tall white guy

turning on the pressure.

Instead, I'm Layanna Desheets,

fun-loving drag queen
who's on their side.

[ Both laugh ]

My wife named her.

Well, Layanna,

dressed like that, I wouldn't
buy a mattress from you.

9 out of 10 times,

it's a couple
looking for a new mattress.

Most guys defer to the wife
or girlfriend,

and in drag, I'm the girl's instant BFF.

So, what's the problem?

My boss is a blowhard.

Yesterday, he tells me
if I don't take off the costume,

he's gonna fire me.

This morning, he did.

I want my job back,

and I want to keep showing up
as Layanna desheets.

Okay. Let me review the relevant law.

I'll try to set up a meeting
with the blowhard.

Thank you.

All right.

[ High-pitched voice ]
Well, hello, there.

Love your shoes.

Of course you do.

And... Who was that?

Old friend.

Girlfriend?

New client.

Possible wrongful termination,

though I'm not sure of the merits.

Parker won't like it.

Well, Parker is staying
in Canada for a few extra days,

so you don't have to worry about him.

You don't sound too happy about that.

He's visiting his son.

I don't have a right to be unhappy.

Is that it?

He's staying with his ex.

- Ah.
- Yeah.

Anyway, I have a soft spot
for drag queens,

so you need my help, I'm yours.

[ Sighs ]

Whoa! What are you do...

shh. Have a seat.

[ Clears throat ]

Yes!

At least you did something right...

And didn't toss these files.

That's an inactive folder.

What are you doing?

Oh, and what do I call you, by the way?

I mean, I'm Deb,
but I go by your name, Jane.

And you're Jane,
and we would call you...?

Brittney.

Yeah, that's whose body I got.

I got a freaking Brittney.

And about what you were saying earlier,

you know, how you think I stole
your life.

I want you to know
I didn't choose this body.

I mean, seriously,
I would never choose this body.

That's really rude.

That... that came out wrong.

I... I'm actually quite happy
with who I am.

And I really love your body. [ Laughs ]

Good for you.

But right now, I want to talk to you

about a case which I need you to win.

I'm sorry. What?

When I was you... or should
I say, "when I was me"?

I was...

I was handling the appeal of
a death-row inmate...

Matthew Thomas.

He was convicted of killing
a classmate... Tracy Rivlin.

Now, pay attention,
'cause we don't have much time.

Our client is innocent.

He only confessed
after a 32-hour interrogation

because he was exhausted.

Well, I'm sure there was evidence.

He once dated the victim

and ditched school
the day she was murdered.

He had no alibi, as his
foster parents were out of town.

Well, that's not enough to convict.

Well, there was a jailhouse
snitch who claimed Matthew

told him details of the crime
that were never released

- by the cops.
- Hmm.

But when I took over the appeal,

I discover the snitch

is related to a detective
who was on the case.

You discovered that?

Yes, it took me two minutes on Facebook.

In exchange for his testimony,

the snitch got 10 years off
his own sentence... for rape.

- Did you alert the judge?
- Yes.

He said the P.D. should have
raised it at the trial.

Look, Jane,
this case has been bothering me

since the day I died.

The governor signed
Matthew's death warrant.

He will be executed
in the next four days.

Hey, Brittney,
when you showed up at my place,

you said that you were here
to take back your life, so...

Yes, I did,

but now my priority is to finish
my unfinished business.

And since Brittney doesn't have
a law degree,

you're gonna have to help me.

Oh, no, yeah.

See, I have a full schedule.

We're gonna head over to the
state pen and meet your client.

Heads up... he's gonna be
very angry with you.

[ Buzzer, cell door closes ]

You promised you'd help me,
Jane, and then you disappeared.

I'm really sorry, but to be honest...

look, Matthew, right now,
she is your only hope.

Who are you?

Uh, she is here doing community
service for her sorority...

bada... bada bing.

Anyway, we really want to help you.

You know, four years ago,

you said you were going to
exhume Tracy's body

to test her shirt for DNA to
prove that I am not the killer.

Yes.

You believe the killer's DNA may
have transferred to the shirt.

But Jane never showed up
to the exhumation

because she was shot on that very day.

- You were shot?
- Oh, yeah.

Oh, I'm totally fine.
I'm a little confused.

Tracy Rivlin was buried in the shirt
she was wearing when she was killed?

Yes, Jane.

Remember, Tracy is Jewish,
and under Jewish law,

the victim of a murder is buried
in her clothing, over which...

over which white shrouds are placed

so all parts of the body
are properly interred...

law of Nahmanides. Oh.

Oh.

Mm-hmm.

The crime lab never tested the shirt,

but when you reviewed
the photos of the victim,

you noticed a few fibers

embedded on a bite mark on her back.

Suggesting that the attacker bit her,

in which case there would be
salivary DNA on that shirt.

- Yes, that's right.
- Uh-huh.

Be honest with me...

do you really think
you can stop my execution?

Of course she does.

She's Jane Bingum.

She doesn't lose.

[ Birds chirping ]

Tracy Rivlin's body was never exhumed.

The shirt is still buried with her.

II don't understand.

Her mother gave permission.
It was all set.

But you never showed up,
so Ms. Rivlin changed her mind.

Well, I'm here now.

So can we exhume the body?

Time is of the essence.

We'll need
the mother's permission again.

[ Door opens ]

I'm sorry. Please excuse me.

We need to get Ms. Rivlin
to sign an exhumation consent.

Okay, you need to talk to her.

Her phone number is in the file.

Oh, in the meantime, I want you
to talk to the jailhouse snitch.

Me?

Yeah. He knows I'm the lawyer.

He's not gonna talk to me,

but he will not be able to
resist a hottie.

Are you calling me a hottie?

Yeah. Do you have a problem with that?

Actually, I... I don't.

Okay. Anyway, we need to
get him to trip up

so that we can poke holes
in the supposed confession.

Okay, I'll just bring him
a carton of cigarettes.

No, no. He'll know you want something.

Here.

What are you doing?

I'm showing you how to get him to talk.

Okay.

Now, you look him straight in the eye.

He will look you straight in
the boobs, but don't be alarmed.

- I am alarmed.
- No.

Use your sex appeal.

You know, I'm a big fan of
the "flip-and-flatter,"

where you flip your hair like this...

...and then you flatter him.

He's a convicted rapist.

We are just pretending.

Oh, and wear dangly earrings,

not as a fashion choice...
ew... but as a weapon.

See, it'll draw focus to
the smooth curves of your neck.

And then you smile.

Just smile.

Do you really think that
that's gonna work?

I think a good lawyer
needs to use all of her assets.

[ High-pitched voice ] Ooh!

Well, hello, there.

You have good taste.
Don't just look at it.

Get in it, take it for a test-drive.

Sir, how do you have this footage?

I asked a manager to tape him.

It's from last Tuesday.

Ooh! Kinky.

But this mattress is...
it's high-resiliency foam.

[ Laughs ]

Okay.

Unacceptable.

I made that sale with all the extras.

Unacceptable.

That get-up in one of
my showrooms... unacceptable.

I reviewed your employee handbook.

You don't have a dress code.

I don't want my salesmen in dresses.

And, as you know,
firing him does not violate

any state or federal
anti-discrimination laws.

However, if you promise
not to wear women's clothing,

you're welcome to come back
to work immediately.

We should discuss.

I make three times my average
commission when I'm in drag.

That's three times the sales for you.

You should appreciate that.

My father started the company,

and I've expanded
from one store in Encino

to 27 showrooms statewide.

Don't tell me what I should appreciate.

Unacceptable.

[ Buzzer ]

Well, well.

Who the heck are you?

I'm... Brittney.

Yeah.

I saw you on TV
at the Matthew Thomas trial.

I've always wanted to meet you
in person,

and I finally got the courage.

A groupie.

[ Laughs ]

Sweet.

[ Laughs ]

I love your shirt.

It's very... Khaki.

They come this way.

So, you got some sort of fetish?

I mean, whatever you're into,
I'm sure I could accommodate.

The Matthew Thomas trial.

I was obsessed.

Oh.

I watched court TV nonstop.

You were so smooth.

The jury hung on your every word.

Of course, who could blame them?

Yeah. The Attorney General said

it was my testimony
that got him put on death row.

Can I ask you a question?

Sweetheart, you can ask me
anything you want.

Jane, where were you this morning?

Pro Bono. Death row.

- Yes, I read the file.
- Oh, good.

I'll need you to pull
all the old records.

Teri?

[ Gasps ]

Oh!

Um... do I know you?

Sorry.

I... I've been telling Brittney

about my awesome assistant.

Y... yes.

It's like I... I've known you for years.

Brittney's gonna help on my pro Bono.

And she was assigned by...

De um, an... anti-death-penalty group.

Mm-hmm.

Oh. Which one?

Uh...

Candy!

There's an anti-death-penalty
group called Candy?

Candy.

Citizens... Against...
New... Death... Yo.

Uh, hey, Brittney,
how did it go at the prison?

Oh, uh, the creep... he looked
me straight in the boobs,

and he answered every question.

Yeah, see?

The flip-and-flatter
will never do you wrong.

He claims that Matthew told him
details of the murder

while they were both in the South yard,

which means that they...

Teri, please verify whether
or not our client and the snitch

were ever in that yard at the same time.

- I'm on it.
- Thanks.

I'm I'm sorry... I... for hugging Teri.

I just... I forgot for a second.

It happens.

I once told my cousin sue
that I loved her,

and now she thinks you're a lesbian.

Oh.

Mm-hmm.

Uh, did you reach Tracy's mother?

Yeah. She is on her way here.

- Um...
- Oh-ho-ho-ho-ho.

[ Gasps ] My little nephew!

- He is so cute.
- Mm.

I used to babysit him all the time.

How is he?

At the family reunion,

I caught him smoking pot
in your aunt's bathroom.

He said if I ratted him out,

he would chop my head off
with a machete.

They grow up so fast.

[ Knock on door ] Excuse me. Ms. Bingum?

Ms. Rivlin.

Ms. Rivlin, thank you for coming.

Four years ago, you convinced
me to dig up my daughter's body,

and then you didn't show up
at the cemetery.

Oh, let me explain.

I almost did it because of you,

and now you ask me to your office

right before the execution?

Well, there were extenuating circum...

[ Gasps ]

My baby is dead.

You can go to hell!

I'm so confused.

Old Jane... I mean, Brittney...

screwed up on a death-row case,
and you get slapped?

I know.

I know, but you can hardly blame
this woman.

She had a right to be angry.

I blame Brittney
for putting you in the middle.

Is she awful?

I kind of admire her.

I mean, she returned to earth,
and the first thing she did

is try to help someone who needs her.

Mm. If I came back to life,

the first thing I would do
is grow bangs.

But you can do that already.

Eh, who's got the time?

Anyway, I would like to meet
this Brittney.

Where is she now?

[ Sighs ]

Here you go.

Coffee with cream,

one white sugar, one brown sugar.

You know, there's only one
other person I've ever known

who takes both kinds of sugar
in her coffee.

- Really?
- Yeah.

My boss, Jane.

But that was a while ago.

Now she drinks it black,
unless she's hormonal.

Then she gets green tea, like it or not.

[ Chuckles ]

So, tell me about... Your boss.

Is she good to you?

Oh, yeah. She's great.

And how are you, Teri,
the last couple years?

Any big changes in your life?

You've grown out your hair.

Seriously, have we met before?

No, I... I saw a photo on your desk.

It was a picture of you
and your mom at the circus.

Well, I... I assume it was your mom,

and I assume it's the circus.

There is a clown in the background.

Anyway, um, you have
a shorter Bob in that photo.

That's... that's...
that's all I'm saying.

Good morning!

It is a good morning.

Your awesome assistant
checked prison records.

At the time of the alleged confession,

our client was housed in cellblock "C."

The snitch was housed in cellblock "B."

Those two cellblocks

were never in the South yard
at the same time.

So our client
never talked to the snitch.

He never heard a confession.
Awesome news.

Exactly. We should go to
the Attorney General on this.

Maybe he'll hear us out.

Oh, Brittney, we only have
one shot with the A.G.,

and this isn't enough evidence.

I disagree.

I disagree with you.

Uh, ladies, we're still on
the same side, though, right?

Yeah. Of course we are.

In fact, would you do us a favor

and take the file into
the conference room...

and blow it up.

I'm sorry. What?

Yeah, it's slang
for when you take a file

and you make a war room out of it...

um, evidence boards with photos
and reports.

You used to say that all the time.

Oh. Yeah. Oh, no, I know.

Yeah, cool.

That's exactly what I want you to do.

I've checked that file a million times.

There is nothing new
that you're gonna find.

Well, I'm a fresh pair of eyes,

and, as you know, I'm really smart.

So whether you like it or not,
we're blowing it up.

[ Sighs ]

Good news...
Judge Sanderson is presiding.

She hates big business and loves me.

- Great.
- Yeah.

And it's a preliminary hearing.

Basically, we just have to
convince the judge

to let us get to trial, all right?

All rise!

Oh. [ Breathes deeply ]

Be seated, except Mr. Kent.

You sounded like you had
something stuck in your throat.

Would you like some water?

I'm fine.

Uh, just looking forward to,
uh, seeing Judge Sanderson.

Yes, well, she has a hangnail
or gout or maybe I volunteered.

I can't remember.

May I approach?

For that, you ask my permission?

Given what happened,

do you really think it's a good idea

for you to be the judge here?

If you have an issue with me,

feel free to file an objection
under CCCP, section 170.1.

What exactly would you cite
as your reason?

You know.

I do?

That I kissed your fiancée
on the day of your wedding.

Yeah, that's right.

[ Smacks lips ]

That's pretty awful.

I imagine you've been practicing
your apology?

I'm... sorry?

Look, why don't you
just recuse yourself?

And miss a chance to see you
at your best? No.

[ Chuckles ]

Grayson, look,
if you file that objection,

I mean, that would be
pretty embarrassing for you,

wouldn't it?

As far as I know,

Jane hasn't told anybody
about what happened,

so why don't you back
to your table, and let's begin.

Yeah.

Your Honor, in California,
employers can terminate at will.

This whole lawsuit is a joke.

So far, I agree. Mr. Kent?

Well, under the doctrine
of promissory estoppel,

my client can't be fired so easily.

Promissory estoppel
in a termination case?

How do you figure?

My client, Cyd Pinar,

worked for six months at minimum wage

prior to being allowed to earn
commissions.

Cyd would not have worked
at minimum wage

but for the promise of commissions,

and no one in management ever told Cyd

his commissions would be predicated

- on how he chose to dress.
- That's ridiculous.

Look, I'm sorry,
but there is no way that

that would apply in a case like this.

What the hell is that?

Your Honor... it's a gorilla.

Why is it in my courtroom?

A salesperson
at the Fresno Mattress Emporium

wears this exact gorilla costume
and hasn't been fired.

We contend that the drag-queen costume

should be treated no differently.

While I question
the merits of this case,

you've made your point.

There is enough here to go to trial,

which will begin later today.

That is all.

[ Breathes deeply ]

Thanks for your help.

No problem. It was fun.

You didn't tell me Owen was the judge.

Eh, last-minute change-up.

What the hell happened at that wedding?

First, Jane doesn't show.
Then Owen passes out.

Now they're not talking.

Mnh-mnh.

It's weird.

You know something, don't you?

I got to get back to the office
and prep for trial.

I could use your help.

Knock-knock.

A peace offering.

Spring lilies are my favorite.

I know.
[ Chuckles ]

Let me ask you something.

The bite mark on Tracy's back...

was it ever compared to our client?

Of course.

The public defender
tried to bring in an expert...

but the national academy
of science doesn't accept

the validity of bite marks,
despite what you see on "CSI."

[ Breathes deeply ] Oh.

Hmm.

Which is why the judge refused
to admit the testimony.

Okay, what's missing from this photo?

I don't follow.

Okay, look closely.

Matthew had braces
at the time of the attack.

Exactly.

So if the attacker bit Tracy so hard

that fibers from the shirt
were embedded in the wound,

then we should see bruising
from the braces

along the edges
of the teeth impressions...

If Matthew was the one who bit her.

There are none.

Now we go to the A.G.?

Now we go to the A.G.

Ms. Bingum, you were handling
this appeal four years ago,

and you seemingly disappeared.

I can only assume you were
conceding your client's guilt.

You would be assuming incorrectly.

Come on. Stepping in at the last minute?

[ Chuckles ]

Nice publicity stunt...
get your name in the paper.

But let's be real.

She is real. She is very real.

And who are you?

I'm a concerned citizen.

Look, whoever committed
this heinous crime

wasn't wearing braces,

or we'd see the associated
bruising in this photo.

Our client was wearing braces
at the time of the attack.

Analysis of old evidence
is not the same as new evidence,

and therefore,
your photo and your conclusions

would be irrelevant.

We done?

We also have evidence that Scott Moore,

the jailhouse snitch, and our client

were never in the south yard
at the same time.

I spoke to Scott.

That's where he said
he heard our client's

so-called confession,
which obviously never happened.

That was four years ago.

And even if he were lying,

the statute of limitations
has expired on perjury.

Not to mention, there's
nothing you've told me today

that would change a judge's mind.

Well, we're not giving up.

A man's life is at stake.

The man was convicted of murder.

He will be executed as scheduled.

Hey.

I've been trying to find
a procedural way back in,

and I've got nothing.

Our only chance
is to convince Ms. Rivlin

to consent to an exhumation
so we can test her shirt.

Yeah, I agree,

but the last time I asked
didn't go real well.

Well, I just got off the phone with her.

She's meeting us downstairs.

What? How did you convince her?

I threatened her with an
assault charge for slapping you.

You threatened the mother
of a homicide victim?

Yes, and it worked.

She's giving us five minutes.
We have to talk fast.

I heard about the bite marks.

The prosecutor explained
how they're not good evidence.

No, that's true.

But we know that this bite mark

was from someone who
clearly wasn't wearing braces.

Matthew is guilty.

He has to be guilty, or
they wouldn't be executing him.

Since 1973,
140 people in the United States

have been cleared while on death row.

Ms. Rivlin,
we didn't know your daughter.

We can only imagine your pain.

If Matthew committed this crime,
he will pay for it,

but if he didn't...

...what would your daughter
want you to do here?

Matthew had braces?

Yes, he did.

You really think he's innocent?

I really think it's worth finding out.

All right.

[ Coughs ]

[ Breathes deeply ]

Your client is late.

He's supposed to take the stand.

This is not good.

[ High-pitched voice ]
Layanna Desheets in the house!

[ Laughter ]
Oh, God.

Hey, no, no. You cannot take
the stand like that.

Why not? Everyone loves Layanna.

You know what? I agree.

Our only hope is that
the jury doesn't see the costume

as changing the business arrangement

the owner implicitly made with Cyd.

I don't know.

Let me ask the questions.

Besides, given the way
Owen looks at you,

I should probably take over, regardless.

Are we ready, counselors?

We are, Your Honor.

We would like to call Cyd Pinar
to the stand.

Mr. Pinar, do you consider
yourself a mattress expert?

You bet. Ask me anything you want.

I'm your man.

[ Laughter ]

Okay.

What's the difference between
coil count,

coil structure, and coil size?

Objection. Relevance.

We are arguing promissory estoppel.

We're trying to show that
our client learned the business

during his six months at minimum wage.

Overruled. Answer the question.

Coil count is an easy way
to up-sell a mattress,

but as long as
you're above 390...You're fine.

Coil structure...
ask for the brand's lineup model

to get the best bang for your buck.

Now, coil size... and I do love
talking about size...

makes little overall difference,

unless, of course, you're a size queen.

[ Light laughter ]

Thank you.

Mr. Pinar...

Were you asked not to wear drag?

Yes.

Were you given warnings
not to wear drag?

Yes.

Were you told
that you would be terminated

if you continued to wear drag?

Yes.

We rest, Your Honor.

We also move to dismiss.

I will consider the motion.

We'll reconvene tomorrow.

- Hey.
- Hey.

- Any word from the lab?
- Yep.

They confirmed that
there was enough salivary DNA

on the victim's shirt for testing.

They are comparing it with
Matthew's profile right now.

That's great news.

Yeah.

So... I guess now we... we just wait.

[ Chuckles ]

You really like working here, don't you?

Yeah.

Well, just like you did.

I used to consider
Harrison & Parker my home,

but all these people... my co-workers...

weren't really my friends.

- Mm.
- Except Teri.

She was like my own human shield.

[ Laughs ]

Well, except for that day you were shot.

- Ugh.
- Yeah.

And Kim?

She always thought
she was so much better than me.

- Right?
- Mm-hmm.

And Parker... he treated me fine,

but I had to work harder
than everybody else.

I know.

To be honest,

I think he felt sorry for me.

But you've earned the respect
of all of them, Jane.

And you've earned mine.

Well. Wow.

Does that mean you forgive me
for stealing your life?

Let's just say we're making progress.

But I have to admit...

I do like what you've done with my hair.

- Oh, thank you.
- Mm.

You know, once a week, I use
an apple-cider-vinegar rinse.

Oh.

And your clothes...
they're fitted and... sexy.

Thanks.

[ Both laugh ]

Yeah, it's all about the right bra,

comfortable spanx, good posture.

You'll pick it up. Mm-hmm.

Right.

I never thought
I cared about those things...

clothes and hair.

But now I realize,

I just didn't think that I could
actually make a difference.

But you were fine the way you were.

All I did was add a little bit
of me to the mix,

you know?

How do you feel about your new body?

When I take off my bra...
nothing happens.

My boobs, which are real,
just stay in place.

It's amazing.

Oh, my God, I hate you
just a little bit.

[ Both laugh ]

I don't know
how you work so close to him.

Uh, what do you mean?

I know that you're in love with him.

As Deb or as Jane...

I know that you're in love with him.

No. I... I love Owen.

And had I not kissed Grayson
at my wedding,

I would actually be married to Owen,

and I would be extremely happy.

Okay, all right.
You don't have to convince me.

No.

But just because you love Owen

doesn't mean you're still not
in love with Grayson.

When I was you, I refused
to believe that life was messy.

I refused to let my own life be messy.

But, like it or not, it just is.

Good news.

Ladies, the lab just called.

The DNA results are back, and
they're not a match for Matthew.

Oh. Whoo!

That should be enough
for a stay of execution.

I am going to draft up a motion
to vacate the conviction,

based on our newly discovered evidence.

I'll let the clerk know to expect it.

The A.G. won't go away quietly.

He's gonna fight the motion.

Yeah, well, going up against
the two of us,

I almost feel sorry for him.

[ Chuckles ]

How's it going?

I don't think Owen's receptive
to promissory estoppel.

I'm looking for a way to defeat
the motion.

I need to show you something.

Coil count is an easy way
to up-sell a mattress...

Someone videotaped Cyd's testimony?

And posted it online.

And from the angle of that camera,

that someone was sitting behind
the defense table.

100,000 hits? How's that possible?

Three local news stations have
linked it to their websites.

Turns out the, uh, fired
drag-queen mattress salesman

makes a good story.

Hmm.

Wait. Go back.

Did you see that? Look at Cyd's head.

He's looking directly at the camera.

Ooh. He knew he was being taped.

It was my sales manager's idea.

In fact, the bet I lost was to him,

and when I kept doing more
and more business in drag,

he figured out a way
to make the most of it.

Today, almost 100 customers called

demanding to buy a mattress
from Layanna desheets.

Wait.

So you were never really fired,
and your boss was in on it?

Yes.

You duped my firm, used
the legal system for profit.

You still get paid.

That's not the point.

Excuse me.

There is a reporter on the line
from the "Times"

who wants to talk about
the drag-queen case.

Tell him I'll call him back.

Oh, and if you ask me,

Layanna wears too much eyeliner
and not enough gloss.

The "times" calling for you.

Its looks like
we're all big winners here!

Thanks for the help.

Cyd, in my interview,
I'll let the reporter know

you'll be making a generous contribution

to a legal-aid charity.

What are you talking about?

You perpetrated a fraud on the court,

used taxpayer dollars for personal gain.

Yeah, and so did you.

Not knowingly.

But I'll take the hit
and report you, if necessary.

Seriously, dude?

You're not gonna do that.

If you want to report him,

you have the full backing of the firm.

Send me the address of the charity.

And if you need a new mattress,
you know where to find me.

Your Honor, this emergency stay

is a desperate attempt to stall
the wheels of justice.

I don't think Your Honor
wouldn't have agreed

to hear my motion if he thought
I was stalling wheels.

While the timing
of the evidence is suspect,

we're talking about a man's life.

And the new DNA evidence
is worth considering.

We're not disputing the DNA,

but it does not exonerate Mr. Thomas.

I don't understand. What is happening?

J... just hang tight.

In fact, the crime-lab report
simply places another person,

in addition to Mr. Thomas, at the scene.

- That is crazy!
- Shh!

Your Honor, that is crazy.

So the prosecution's theory of the case

is now that there was
a second perpetrator?

That's because the new evidence
is only now coming to light.

I tend to agree with the A.G.

New evidence is not exculpatory.

It's simply additive.

With that in mind, the execution
will take place as...

Hold on, Your Lordship.

Excuse me. Who are you?

Oh, I'm just some hot Asian chick

with really awesome tattoos,

which I would love to show you
sometime... maybe in chambers.

But right now, I'm just vamping
for another 10 seconds

so that my boss can fully digest
what I just handed her.

Your Honor, I hold the lab results

on the DNA from the crime scene.

- We've been through all this.
- I know.

And, as you know,
there was a jailhouse snitch

who testified in trial
that my client confessed to him.

He had details of the crime

he could have only gotten
from your client.

Well, there is another way.

The reason the snitch knew the
intimate details of the crime

is because...

is because the snitch
is the real killer.

- What she said.
- That's outrageous.

Yes, but absolutely true.

After the private lab ran
the DNA analysis

against Matthew Thomas
and didn't get a match,

the lab sent the DNA sample
to the FBI crime lab.

And a DNA is a match
to Scott Moore, the snitch.

I'd like to see the report.

Tracy Rivlin was murdered
four years ago on June 2nd.

At that time, the snitch...
Scott Moore... was not in jail.

Rather, he was living in Simi Valley,

20 minutes from where
Tracy's body was found.

On June 17th, Mr. Moore was
arrested on an unrelated charge.

Mr. Moore knew the intimate
details of that murder

not because my client ever spoke with him,

but because he committed that crime.

Young man, please stand.

There is no doubt
that you were wrongly convicted.

I can only hope
that you will spend your days

looking ahead and not back.

I order the immediate release
of Matthew Thomas.

[ Gavel bangs ]
[ Exhales deeply ]

- Thank you.
- You're welcome.

Oh. [ Laughs ]

You know, you should
really thank Brittney, too.

She had more to do with
this case than you'll ever know.

Thank you.

Hey. You okay?

[ Voice breaking ] Go away.

What's wrong?

Parker.

He's back? I haven't seen him.

No.

He was supposed to be back
this afternoon.

But he never showed.

I didn't hear from him until just now.

Well, what happened?

Oh, nothing.

He's just, um... staying in Toronto,

and he'll keep his shares
and his partnership,

but wants me to take over
as managing partner

in the meantime.

Well, what about you guys?

And the baby?

He didn't say anything about us.

But I did get him to admit

that he's getting back together
with his ex, so, um...

I'm sorry.

I'm such an idiot.

I... thought when...

when he came back, he was gonna propose.

[ Laughs ]

When I found out I was pregnant,

I was never gonna tell him
he was the father.

And then I did,

and he said he wanted to be here
for me and the baby.

And... I fell for it.

I'm sorry.

I don't mean to dump all of this on you.

[ Crying ] I'm just...
I'm just a hormonal mess.

And my... my boobs hurt, and I
pee like a thousand times a day

and I can't sleep on my stomach anymore.

[ Sniffles ]

Just ignore me.

I kissed Jane in front of Owen.

That's why they didn't get married.

Holy crap. Why are you telling me this?

I have no idea.
Just wanted to distract you.

Well, it worked.

[ Laughs ]

Oh, my God.

Well, I guess that explains
that big fiasco.

You kissed Jane?

Mm.

You have feelings for Jane.

I so did not see this coming.

Yeah, well, that's because
you're usually too self-involved

to notice stuff like that.

Oh, thank you. [ Laughs ]

Hey, Kim, I'm here for you.

Seriously, anything you need,
you let me know.

Thanks.

And I'm not just saying that

because now you're
the boss of this place.

Hi.

Hi. Where are you going?

I bought myself
a one-way ticket to Paris.

[ Laughing ] Paris?

I never knew you wanted to go to Paris.

You never noticed that picture?

Honestly, I thought
it just came with the frame.

It did. [ Chuckles ]

As Jane, I always wanted to go,

but I knew deep down inside
that I never would.

You know, I never took a single
vacation day when I worked here.

Yeah, don't be mad.

I kind of cashed in those vacation days

to help pay for my wedding.

I'm sorry that it didn't work out.

Oh, no, there's still time.

[ Chuckles ]

So, before I go,
do you have any advice for me?

Oh... well,
I would tell you to be yourself,

but it's gonna take a while
to figure out who that is.

Oh, and what about a guardian angel?

Did they give you one?

I am on my third one.

I haven't seen the guy in days.

He's a total slacker.

Yeah, mine showed up last night.

She's kind of bossy.

She?

Ooh.

She says I need to stay away from you.

She says I need to live my life
as Brittney, not as Jane.

Yeah.

Yeah, that sounds familiar.

How do you feel about that?

Well, I'm gonna miss me,

but... I'll make the best of it...

Just like you did.

Oh, wait.

The best advice I can give you...

you have a second chance.
Make the most of it.

I plan to.

Bye, Jane.

Bye, Brittney.

♪ If you're feeling a little cold ♪

♪ I've got some... that you can hold ♪

♪ If you're feeling a little shy ♪

Right there by your side ♪

♪ Lift your head

♪ lift your heart

♪ and don't forget

♪ who you are

[ Sighs ]

♪ No, don't forget, no

♪ I'm singin' whoo, ooh-ooh