Dragons: Riders of Berk (2012–2014): Season 3, Episode 13 - Total Nightmare - full transcript
This changes everything.
_
Come on, Toothless!
Faster, bud.
- There they are.
- Close the dome.
- And so the drama begins.
- One man, one dragon, one leg...
versus one rapidly closing dome.
It's gonna be close!
Yeah, no way he's making that.
- What?
- Good job, Toothless.
Woo-hoo!
Ooh!
- All right, we're up.
- Come on, Snotlout.
Nobody's been able to beat
the dome except Hiccup.
- Nobody till now.
- Guys, this was supposed to be a drill.
Do you have to turn it into a game?
- Don't we always?
- Fair point.
'Twas once a drill.
Then it became a game.
- Now, it is theater!
- Let the drama unfold!
Whatever it is, it's my turn.
I'll wager he loses an eye.
Ha-ha! On the contrary, I
predict that Act 1 Scene 1
will conclude with the
loss of a gall bladder.
Hm. Or perhaps a leg.
What say you, young Hiccup?
Okay.
Woo-hoo!
Hey!
Ah!
Stay focused, Hookfang!
Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!
Ow!
Keep your head in the game.
Hookfang!
He hath emerged from the forest!
- And what of his gall bladder?
- Impossible to say.
The tension continues to build.
And time runs out for our
plucky little anti-hero.
I love a ticking sundial, don't you?
- Indeed.
- Guys, please.
Hookfang, beat the dome!
Hurry up!
Ah-ha!
- Snotlout, are you okay?
- Define "okay."
- Where's Hookfang?
- That's what I'd like to know.
I've got some words for that dragon!
Hookfang!
Hookfang, where are you?
Finally! There you are.
Hey, wow! What's with the attitude?
I'm supposed to be mad here.
Are you okay, Hooky?
You've got to be starving.
Come on, Hookfang, let's get you
back to Dragon's Edge.
Here, Hookfang.
Ow!
What? You love mackerel.
Hookfang!
Ow!
Everybody saw that, right?
Yes, we did, my friend,
and it was delightful.
Good sir, can you re-enact it for us?
No, I'm talking about Hookfang.
He's acting weird.
- How's that?
- Well, he didn't listen to me
during the race, he ran away,
he just spit fish in my face,
and then threw me against the wall.
- And this is weird how?
- You have to admit, Snotlout,
that does kind of sum up your
relationship with Hookfang.
If you're coming over here
to tell me I'm crazy, save it.
You know what, Snotlout?
You're right.
- I am?
- No one knows your dragon like you do.
If you really think
something's wrong with him,
then lock him in a pen
for tonight so he just doesn't
hurt himself. Then we can see
how he's doing in the morning.
Yeah.
Yeah. Maybe I'll do that.
Don't look at me like that.
This is for your own good.
See you in the morning.
Hey! Hookfang, you feeling better?
Who wants tuna for breakfast?
Hookfang?
Hookfang?
Hookfang is gone! He broke
out of his pen last night!
Then this might be more
serious than we thought.
Great. I accept your offer
to help in the search.
Come on, Toothless. Up, bud.
Fly, bud.
- Do something, bud!
- Okay! Okay, calm down, Snotlout.
We'll help you look for Hookfang.
Oh yeah, you will, it
was your idea to leave
him alone in his pen in the first place.
Hookfang! Hookfang!
Easy, bud.
The sooner we find Hookfang,
sooner we'll get Snotlout off your back.
- Give me your eye thingy.
- You mean my spy glass?
That sound, we heard that
before Hookfang weirded out.
- Go that way!
- Would you...
Okay. Okay, let me fly the dragon.
That sounded like
a Monstrous Nightmare.
This place again?
This is where I found him last time.
Look! There is another
Monstrous Nightmare!
That's not just another
Monstrous Nightmare.
That's a female Monstrous Nightmare.
A female Monstrous Nightmare?
Now it all makes sense.
My dragon has a way with the ladies!
Must have picked up
a few pointers from his master.
I doubt it.
She's not dry heaving.
Okay, shush.
Hookfang, time's up. Let's go.
Snotlout, you might
want to tread lightly.
He's looking a wee bit territorial.
"Bit territorial."
Thanks for the advice.
Like you said, "nobody knows
my dragon like I do."
So, when it comes to Hookfang,
I handle my own business.
Hookfang? Girl Hookfang?
What's...
Yeah, he's busy right now.
Snotlout, it's not that bad.
- It could have been a lot worse.
- I fear not, fear maiden.
Hookfang clearly made a decisive
choice in that moment,
and, thus, acted upon it.
Mm. Showing, not telling.
The number one rule in theater.
And what better way to achieve
that than by setting one aflame!
Kid all you want, but I know that dragon.
I know what's in his
heart and in his head.
- He'll come back to me, like he always does.
- Uh...
Uh, what?! You're gonna tell me
he's never coming back?
- Uh...
- Fishlegs?
Hookfang wouldn't follow his
training, he wouldn't eat,
he ran away twice, he picked
another dragon over you.
- Don't forget the fire thing.
- Right. He pushed you away.
- All the symptoms are there.
- Symptoms of what?
I think Hookfang is going feral.
- No, not going feral?
- The cruelest turn of events...
- Wait, wat's "going feral" mean?
- I have no idea.
It means that meeting this female
has reawakened his primal instincts.
And he's returning to the wild.
Shut up, Fishface!
What do you know?!
Hookfang needs me.
It's nature, Snotlout.
You can't fight it.
Watch me.
Bravo!
Bravissimo! Encore!
- Ah, what theater!
- Yes, and what a cliffhanger.
It's a scary idea, huh?
That one of our dragons might
just one day go back to the wild?
You'd never do that to me, would you bud?
I didn't think so.
Come on. If it was going to happen
to anyone, it's gonna be Snotlout.
I mean, none of us have to worry.
Right?
What smells so good?
You're giving Meatlug a rubdown?
Yeah.
With her favorite lingonberry oil.
Just letting her know she's appreciated.
Finally!
Primal instincts, Thor's butt!
My primal instinct is
to get my dragon back.
Hi, Girl Hookfang!
I see, you already got my boy
bringing dinner for you. Big step.
Alright, relax. I just wanted
to come over and say hello.
Maybe bring a little dessert for you?
I've got something very special.
What? You don't like eel?
Oops. If I were you, I'd
fly away and never look back.
A... little... help... here!
I have had enough of you, Hookfang!
It's time to choose, her or me.
- Any luck with Hookfang?
- You give a dragon
the best years of your life
and then... pfft ...it's over!
You want more bauxite, girl?
Classic romantic comedy paradigm.
Boy gets dragon, boy loses dragon,
dragon falls asleep, boy eats,
boy falls asleep, dragon eats.
Oh! Gets me every time.
I give up.
If being with her makes
Hookfang happy, I guess
I should be happy for him, too.
Ugh.
If you'll excuse me,
I think I'm going to go
lay down for a few... weeks.
Wow. It's really not like Snotlout
to give up this easily.
What can he do?
Hookfang hath forsaken him.
I, too, would be depress-ed,
if Barf and Belch forsook-ed me.
- And if I forsak-ed thee?
- Eh. That wouldn't bother me.
We've gotta get him back
in the saddle right away.
Taht means
we've got some work to do.
What's this?
We stayed up all night
wrangling some new dragons.
We figured, maybe with
Hookfang going through...
well, whatever he's going
through, this might help.
Guys, I don't know what to say.
- Thank Thor.
- Except that you wasted your time.
Oh, come on, Snotlout,
at least try them out.
As awesome as Hookfire,
Fangmaster and Hook Blazefang are...
and I named them all already.
I can't look at them and
not think of Hookfang.
Another cruel twist.
Snotlout rejects the new suitors.
Begone, pretenders, and never return!
I hast forsookenst thou.
Snotlout, I know you're hurting, but
we need you up there with us.
Dagur's out there looking for us.
We can't be down a rider.
What if you tried riding
a different kind of dragon?
- I don't know. Maybe.
- Yeah! There you go!
How about a Nadder?
Uh, Astrid?
He doesn't want to ride
Stormfly again. He's already...
Too small, too slow, two heads.
Okay.
You don't like any of these dragons.
So maybe we try some new ones.
A Thunderdrum or a Timberjack?
Or how about...
Listen guys, I don't want to
come off as thankful or anything,
but you taught me a lesson today
- by offering me your inferior dragons.
- What are you saying?
I'm saying that if I can't fly Hookfang,
I don't want to fly any dragon.
How can you be a dragon rider
and not ride a dragon?
You were always the smart one, Astrid.
- Wait a minute, you're...
- Quitting, that's right.
I shall be a dragon rider no more.
- What?
- Time to call in the understudy.
Hey Fishlegs, how's your Snotlout?
Oh, come on Snotlout, you're
just hurting now, that's all.
- Give it some time.
- No, Hiccup, my mind is made up.
I'm going to say goodbye to Hookfang,
and then sail back to Berk for good.
It's over.
Hello, Hookfang?
Girl Hookfang?
I've come to say goodbye.
Hookfang?
What did you do to him?
I knew you were bad news!
Make your move, she-devil.
Eggs? What's going on here?
A Titan Wing Monstrous Nightmare?
Come on! Could this get any worse?
Whoa.
I'd stay away from that guy.
Hookfang!
What are you doing?!
I don't know why I'm doing
this, but here goes nothing.
You want Hookfang's girlfriend,
you got to go through...
What are you guys doing here?
- Not that I'm complaining.
- We came to convince you not to quit.
You wanna tell us what's going on here?
It looks like two male
dragons fighting over a female.
Yeah, I've heard male Vikings do it too,
but I've personally never seen it.
But the Titan Wing heard the
female's mating call, too,
- and was drawn to it.
- Ah-ha! A love triangle!
Wrong. Girl Hookfang has
three eggs in that cave.
Hookfang has been helping her
protect them from giant jerk dragon.
That wasn't a mating call.
Hookfang was...
it was a distress call!
Well, we taught him a lesson.
He won't be back.
Yes, he will. They're
probably the eggs of a rival.
Titan Wings won't give up
until they're destroyed.
So Hookfang didn't go feral after all?
Apparently not.
He's trying to establish dominance
over the Titan Wing so he'll
leave the eggs alone. Wow!
- I knew it!
- A true underdog story.
- Yes! The apex of dramaturgy!
- Ha! I'm proud of you, buddy.
Girl Hookfang just became
an honorary Jorgensen.
Oh, boy.
- Uh, Hiccup?
- Yeah?
Remember what I said about
the Titan Wing
- Monstrous Nightmare coming back?
- Yeah?
Well...
Hookfang can't take on
that Totan Wing alone.
He won't be alone.
- Neither will you.
- We've gotta do this ourselves.
No way! That thing will tear
you apart. Saddle up, everybody.
You heard Fishlegs.
That Titan Wing will only stop
if it's dominated by Hookfang.
- He's right.
- But Hiccup, look at that thing.
- It's...
- I know. Gigantic, scary, angry.
- Bloodthirsty!
- Thanks, Tuff.
Sorry. Writer's embellishment.
Get him, Snotlout.
You guys can do this.
Hey, be careful.
He's pretty nasty.
Whatever happens to us, promise
me you'll protect those eggs.
We will.
He's crazy.
- He's Snotlout.
- True.
- Yeah!
- Nice move!
Hookfang's smaller
but he's more maneuverable.
The climax approaches.
This is gonna hurt.
Way to go, Girl Hookfang!
I always did like you.
Okay, Hookfang,
time to play Beat the Dome!
Beat the Dome?
That's his great idea?
Whoa, whoa. Snotlout's
never beaten the dome.
You're right, he hasn't.
Okay, Astrid, Tuff,
Ruff, you're with me.
Fishlegs, stay with Girl Hookfang
and defend the eggs.
All right, keep coming,
keep coming, keep coming.
Woo-hoo!
Oh, you couldn't make that turn?
Man, you're gonna hate this.
Start the dome, now!
Yes, they got it!
Oh, no!
They didn't make it!
Got you! Ha!
Great shot, Hookfang.
Hookfang's using the Titan
Wing's size against him!
He's trying to wear it down.
Quick, open the dome!
Whoa!
Now, that's what I call domination.
Boom!
You tell him, Fangster.
Guys, look. They hatched!
And to think I saved them.
Okay, okay!
We saved them. We saved them.
Snotlout, Hookfang!
Oi! Oi! Oi!
I know.
- Uh, what's wrong with you two?
- Nothing.
You just don't see enough
happy endings these days.
Snotlout!
Oi! Oi! Oi!
Oi! Oi! Oi! Oi!
_
Come on, Toothless!
Faster, bud.
- There they are.
- Close the dome.
- And so the drama begins.
- One man, one dragon, one leg...
versus one rapidly closing dome.
It's gonna be close!
Yeah, no way he's making that.
- What?
- Good job, Toothless.
Woo-hoo!
Ooh!
- All right, we're up.
- Come on, Snotlout.
Nobody's been able to beat
the dome except Hiccup.
- Nobody till now.
- Guys, this was supposed to be a drill.
Do you have to turn it into a game?
- Don't we always?
- Fair point.
'Twas once a drill.
Then it became a game.
- Now, it is theater!
- Let the drama unfold!
Whatever it is, it's my turn.
I'll wager he loses an eye.
Ha-ha! On the contrary, I
predict that Act 1 Scene 1
will conclude with the
loss of a gall bladder.
Hm. Or perhaps a leg.
What say you, young Hiccup?
Okay.
Woo-hoo!
Hey!
Ah!
Stay focused, Hookfang!
Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!
Ow!
Keep your head in the game.
Hookfang!
He hath emerged from the forest!
- And what of his gall bladder?
- Impossible to say.
The tension continues to build.
And time runs out for our
plucky little anti-hero.
I love a ticking sundial, don't you?
- Indeed.
- Guys, please.
Hookfang, beat the dome!
Hurry up!
Ah-ha!
- Snotlout, are you okay?
- Define "okay."
- Where's Hookfang?
- That's what I'd like to know.
I've got some words for that dragon!
Hookfang!
Hookfang, where are you?
Finally! There you are.
Hey, wow! What's with the attitude?
I'm supposed to be mad here.
Are you okay, Hooky?
You've got to be starving.
Come on, Hookfang, let's get you
back to Dragon's Edge.
Here, Hookfang.
Ow!
What? You love mackerel.
Hookfang!
Ow!
Everybody saw that, right?
Yes, we did, my friend,
and it was delightful.
Good sir, can you re-enact it for us?
No, I'm talking about Hookfang.
He's acting weird.
- How's that?
- Well, he didn't listen to me
during the race, he ran away,
he just spit fish in my face,
and then threw me against the wall.
- And this is weird how?
- You have to admit, Snotlout,
that does kind of sum up your
relationship with Hookfang.
If you're coming over here
to tell me I'm crazy, save it.
You know what, Snotlout?
You're right.
- I am?
- No one knows your dragon like you do.
If you really think
something's wrong with him,
then lock him in a pen
for tonight so he just doesn't
hurt himself. Then we can see
how he's doing in the morning.
Yeah.
Yeah. Maybe I'll do that.
Don't look at me like that.
This is for your own good.
See you in the morning.
Hey! Hookfang, you feeling better?
Who wants tuna for breakfast?
Hookfang?
Hookfang?
Hookfang is gone! He broke
out of his pen last night!
Then this might be more
serious than we thought.
Great. I accept your offer
to help in the search.
Come on, Toothless. Up, bud.
Fly, bud.
- Do something, bud!
- Okay! Okay, calm down, Snotlout.
We'll help you look for Hookfang.
Oh yeah, you will, it
was your idea to leave
him alone in his pen in the first place.
Hookfang! Hookfang!
Easy, bud.
The sooner we find Hookfang,
sooner we'll get Snotlout off your back.
- Give me your eye thingy.
- You mean my spy glass?
That sound, we heard that
before Hookfang weirded out.
- Go that way!
- Would you...
Okay. Okay, let me fly the dragon.
That sounded like
a Monstrous Nightmare.
This place again?
This is where I found him last time.
Look! There is another
Monstrous Nightmare!
That's not just another
Monstrous Nightmare.
That's a female Monstrous Nightmare.
A female Monstrous Nightmare?
Now it all makes sense.
My dragon has a way with the ladies!
Must have picked up
a few pointers from his master.
I doubt it.
She's not dry heaving.
Okay, shush.
Hookfang, time's up. Let's go.
Snotlout, you might
want to tread lightly.
He's looking a wee bit territorial.
"Bit territorial."
Thanks for the advice.
Like you said, "nobody knows
my dragon like I do."
So, when it comes to Hookfang,
I handle my own business.
Hookfang? Girl Hookfang?
What's...
Yeah, he's busy right now.
Snotlout, it's not that bad.
- It could have been a lot worse.
- I fear not, fear maiden.
Hookfang clearly made a decisive
choice in that moment,
and, thus, acted upon it.
Mm. Showing, not telling.
The number one rule in theater.
And what better way to achieve
that than by setting one aflame!
Kid all you want, but I know that dragon.
I know what's in his
heart and in his head.
- He'll come back to me, like he always does.
- Uh...
Uh, what?! You're gonna tell me
he's never coming back?
- Uh...
- Fishlegs?
Hookfang wouldn't follow his
training, he wouldn't eat,
he ran away twice, he picked
another dragon over you.
- Don't forget the fire thing.
- Right. He pushed you away.
- All the symptoms are there.
- Symptoms of what?
I think Hookfang is going feral.
- No, not going feral?
- The cruelest turn of events...
- Wait, wat's "going feral" mean?
- I have no idea.
It means that meeting this female
has reawakened his primal instincts.
And he's returning to the wild.
Shut up, Fishface!
What do you know?!
Hookfang needs me.
It's nature, Snotlout.
You can't fight it.
Watch me.
Bravo!
Bravissimo! Encore!
- Ah, what theater!
- Yes, and what a cliffhanger.
It's a scary idea, huh?
That one of our dragons might
just one day go back to the wild?
You'd never do that to me, would you bud?
I didn't think so.
Come on. If it was going to happen
to anyone, it's gonna be Snotlout.
I mean, none of us have to worry.
Right?
What smells so good?
You're giving Meatlug a rubdown?
Yeah.
With her favorite lingonberry oil.
Just letting her know she's appreciated.
Finally!
Primal instincts, Thor's butt!
My primal instinct is
to get my dragon back.
Hi, Girl Hookfang!
I see, you already got my boy
bringing dinner for you. Big step.
Alright, relax. I just wanted
to come over and say hello.
Maybe bring a little dessert for you?
I've got something very special.
What? You don't like eel?
Oops. If I were you, I'd
fly away and never look back.
A... little... help... here!
I have had enough of you, Hookfang!
It's time to choose, her or me.
- Any luck with Hookfang?
- You give a dragon
the best years of your life
and then... pfft ...it's over!
You want more bauxite, girl?
Classic romantic comedy paradigm.
Boy gets dragon, boy loses dragon,
dragon falls asleep, boy eats,
boy falls asleep, dragon eats.
Oh! Gets me every time.
I give up.
If being with her makes
Hookfang happy, I guess
I should be happy for him, too.
Ugh.
If you'll excuse me,
I think I'm going to go
lay down for a few... weeks.
Wow. It's really not like Snotlout
to give up this easily.
What can he do?
Hookfang hath forsaken him.
I, too, would be depress-ed,
if Barf and Belch forsook-ed me.
- And if I forsak-ed thee?
- Eh. That wouldn't bother me.
We've gotta get him back
in the saddle right away.
Taht means
we've got some work to do.
What's this?
We stayed up all night
wrangling some new dragons.
We figured, maybe with
Hookfang going through...
well, whatever he's going
through, this might help.
Guys, I don't know what to say.
- Thank Thor.
- Except that you wasted your time.
Oh, come on, Snotlout,
at least try them out.
As awesome as Hookfire,
Fangmaster and Hook Blazefang are...
and I named them all already.
I can't look at them and
not think of Hookfang.
Another cruel twist.
Snotlout rejects the new suitors.
Begone, pretenders, and never return!
I hast forsookenst thou.
Snotlout, I know you're hurting, but
we need you up there with us.
Dagur's out there looking for us.
We can't be down a rider.
What if you tried riding
a different kind of dragon?
- I don't know. Maybe.
- Yeah! There you go!
How about a Nadder?
Uh, Astrid?
He doesn't want to ride
Stormfly again. He's already...
Too small, too slow, two heads.
Okay.
You don't like any of these dragons.
So maybe we try some new ones.
A Thunderdrum or a Timberjack?
Or how about...
Listen guys, I don't want to
come off as thankful or anything,
but you taught me a lesson today
- by offering me your inferior dragons.
- What are you saying?
I'm saying that if I can't fly Hookfang,
I don't want to fly any dragon.
How can you be a dragon rider
and not ride a dragon?
You were always the smart one, Astrid.
- Wait a minute, you're...
- Quitting, that's right.
I shall be a dragon rider no more.
- What?
- Time to call in the understudy.
Hey Fishlegs, how's your Snotlout?
Oh, come on Snotlout, you're
just hurting now, that's all.
- Give it some time.
- No, Hiccup, my mind is made up.
I'm going to say goodbye to Hookfang,
and then sail back to Berk for good.
It's over.
Hello, Hookfang?
Girl Hookfang?
I've come to say goodbye.
Hookfang?
What did you do to him?
I knew you were bad news!
Make your move, she-devil.
Eggs? What's going on here?
A Titan Wing Monstrous Nightmare?
Come on! Could this get any worse?
Whoa.
I'd stay away from that guy.
Hookfang!
What are you doing?!
I don't know why I'm doing
this, but here goes nothing.
You want Hookfang's girlfriend,
you got to go through...
What are you guys doing here?
- Not that I'm complaining.
- We came to convince you not to quit.
You wanna tell us what's going on here?
It looks like two male
dragons fighting over a female.
Yeah, I've heard male Vikings do it too,
but I've personally never seen it.
But the Titan Wing heard the
female's mating call, too,
- and was drawn to it.
- Ah-ha! A love triangle!
Wrong. Girl Hookfang has
three eggs in that cave.
Hookfang has been helping her
protect them from giant jerk dragon.
That wasn't a mating call.
Hookfang was...
it was a distress call!
Well, we taught him a lesson.
He won't be back.
Yes, he will. They're
probably the eggs of a rival.
Titan Wings won't give up
until they're destroyed.
So Hookfang didn't go feral after all?
Apparently not.
He's trying to establish dominance
over the Titan Wing so he'll
leave the eggs alone. Wow!
- I knew it!
- A true underdog story.
- Yes! The apex of dramaturgy!
- Ha! I'm proud of you, buddy.
Girl Hookfang just became
an honorary Jorgensen.
Oh, boy.
- Uh, Hiccup?
- Yeah?
Remember what I said about
the Titan Wing
- Monstrous Nightmare coming back?
- Yeah?
Well...
Hookfang can't take on
that Totan Wing alone.
He won't be alone.
- Neither will you.
- We've gotta do this ourselves.
No way! That thing will tear
you apart. Saddle up, everybody.
You heard Fishlegs.
That Titan Wing will only stop
if it's dominated by Hookfang.
- He's right.
- But Hiccup, look at that thing.
- It's...
- I know. Gigantic, scary, angry.
- Bloodthirsty!
- Thanks, Tuff.
Sorry. Writer's embellishment.
Get him, Snotlout.
You guys can do this.
Hey, be careful.
He's pretty nasty.
Whatever happens to us, promise
me you'll protect those eggs.
We will.
He's crazy.
- He's Snotlout.
- True.
- Yeah!
- Nice move!
Hookfang's smaller
but he's more maneuverable.
The climax approaches.
This is gonna hurt.
Way to go, Girl Hookfang!
I always did like you.
Okay, Hookfang,
time to play Beat the Dome!
Beat the Dome?
That's his great idea?
Whoa, whoa. Snotlout's
never beaten the dome.
You're right, he hasn't.
Okay, Astrid, Tuff,
Ruff, you're with me.
Fishlegs, stay with Girl Hookfang
and defend the eggs.
All right, keep coming,
keep coming, keep coming.
Woo-hoo!
Oh, you couldn't make that turn?
Man, you're gonna hate this.
Start the dome, now!
Yes, they got it!
Oh, no!
They didn't make it!
Got you! Ha!
Great shot, Hookfang.
Hookfang's using the Titan
Wing's size against him!
He's trying to wear it down.
Quick, open the dome!
Whoa!
Now, that's what I call domination.
Boom!
You tell him, Fangster.
Guys, look. They hatched!
And to think I saved them.
Okay, okay!
We saved them. We saved them.
Snotlout, Hookfang!
Oi! Oi! Oi!
I know.
- Uh, what's wrong with you two?
- Nothing.
You just don't see enough
happy endings these days.
Snotlout!
Oi! Oi! Oi!
Oi! Oi! Oi! Oi!