Dragon Ball (1995–2003): Season 1, Episode 4 - Oolong the Terrible - full transcript

[GOKU] Weeeee! Ho ho ho!

Woah, ha ha ha!

[BULMA] Hm?

Waaah!

[BULMA] Goku, wait for me!

[NARRATOR] Goku and Bulma have
already collected four of the

seven magic Dragon Balls.

Now, with only three
more to find before

they can make their wish,
our heroes race towards

the location of the fifth
Dragon Ball, which, according

to Bulma's radar, isn't far off.

[engine roaring]

[GOKU] Whoo, hooo! Ha ha ha!

Hey, Squirt! Pay
attention to where you're going!

You're not invincible, you know!

[BULMA screaming]

[crash]

[GOKU] Wow! Are you okay, Bulma?

Ugh. Does it look
like I'm okay, you twerp?

[whimpering]

[GOKU] I guess not.

Bulma, look, the
Dragon Ball is glowing!

You know what this
means, don't you?

The fifth ball must be
really close. This is great!

Hey, look over there!
Do you see what I see?

[BULMA] A village!
Good eye, kid.

Do you think it's there?

Well, there's only
one way to find out.

[engine whirring]

[BULMA] I wonder
where everybody is.

[GOKU] Huh?

[BULMA] Let's see
what the radar says.

Yep, the fifth
Dragon Ball's here alright.

Something's weird.

[BULMA] It's too quiet.

Maybe this village
has been deserted.

[GOKU] No, people are
here. I can feel it.

[BULMA] Are you sure, Goku?

It seems like an
old ghost town to me.

Yeah, I'm positive.

[BULMA] If you say so.

[GOKU] Hello, in
there! Come on out!

[BULMA] Hello? Is
anybody home? Hello?

[GOKU] I think I just saw
someone peeking at us

from that window over there.

[BULMA] This is getting freaky.

There must be some reason
why they won't come out here,

and I'm gonna find out!

[GOKU] Hello? I know
you're in there. Hello?

I hope they're not
in some sort of trouble.

[GOKU] Oh, yeah.
That did the trick.

Ever consider
using the handle?

[BULMA and GOKU] Hmm?

[GOKU] Huh?

Aah, oww!
Ow, ow, ow, ow!

[screams]

Ahh. Oh, no.
It's just as I feared...

Oh, I should have known...

[GIRL] Huh?

[GOKU] What'd you do that for?!
That didn't tickle, you know!

Oh, please forgive
me, Mister Oolong!

I know it was foolish of
me to try and attack you,

but I'd rather die
than lose my daughter!

Oh, please don't take
her! I'll do anything!

--[GOKU] Huh?
--[BULMA] Oolong?

Hey, I think you've got
me mixed up with someone.

[GOKU] My name's Goku.

[GIRL] It's not him, Dad.

[crowd murmuring]

[GIRL] Here we
go, this'll help.

[GOKU] Careful! Ow!

What a thick head!

Yeah, ha ha!

He could've been killed!
Shame on you! Hmph!

I thought he was Oolong!

[MAN] I was only trying
to protect my daughter.

[GOKU] Daughter? Does that
mean that you're a girl?

[giggles]

[screaming]

Yep! Thought so!
You're a girl alright.

[GOKU laughing]

What'd you do that for?!

Guess, Einstein!

[GOKU] Hm?

So what does this
Oolong fellow do

that makes everybody
so afraid of him?

[GIRL crying]

He's our worst nightmare.

He's a blackness that has
descended on our village.

A monster who treats
us like his toys.

That bad?

[MAN] Much worse.

How so?

Well, somehow this terrible
creature has the power

to change into any
shape it wants to.

[growling]

[screaming]

[GOBLIN chuckles]

Instead of one nightmare,
we're cursed by many.

No one knows his real
identity, we just know

[MAN] he wants our daughters.

That monster's kidnapped three
girls from the village already.

[BULMA] Huh?

[MAN] And yesterday my
darkest fears came true.

He wants my daughter, Pocowatha.

Today's your lucky day,
Sherman Priest!

I've decided to
honor your house by taking

your daughter's hand
in marriage tomorrow!

[POCOWATHA crying]

[GOBLIN] Pack your
bag, Pocowatha!

And don't worry
about the dowry, Dad!

[GOBLIN laughing]

Bully! Maybe we can

trap him when
he comes back again.

How will you do that?
He's bigger than this house!

My word. You don't
get it, do you?

Oolong would squish
you like a little bug!

There's no way to
stop this monster!

[whimpering]

[SHERMAN] So tell us: why have
you two come here anyway?

I'll show you.

[SHERMAN] Hmm?

[BULMA] Let's see...
there it is!

We came to find a ball
that matches this one.

Hm. Strange.
Yes, it's very beautiful.

But I've never seen
anything like it.

--[OLD WOMAN] Well, I have.
--[SHERMAN] Huh?

Young lady, I have
the matching one.

I knew there was one here!

What do you know?
How 'bout that.

[BULMA] Can I see it, please?

[OLD WOMAN] Mm-hmm.

Here it is.

Yeah! The six-star ball!

[GOKU] Wow.

--Cool!
--Would you give it to us?

I'm not going to
give this ball away.

It's been in my
family for generations.

[BULMA] Would you give us
your Dragon Ball if we could

get rid of that Oolong creep,
get the girls back,

and return your village
to a peaceful place again?

[SHERMAN] A-Ah, by yourselves?

Now, listen, I may be old
but I'm not gullible.

How could the two
of you defeat Oolong?

Well, Goku and I
are quite a team, ma'am.

Right? Huh?

[crowd murmuring]

[BULMA yells]

So you're a girl,
aren't you?

Huh?! What a randy boy!

Are you crazy?!
Please stop doing that!

[BULMA] Ugh!

[MAN] Do you think that you and
that boy really have a chance

to beat Oolong, Miss?

[BULMA] Yeah, I think we
have a good chance.

Goku's a little on the puny
side, but he packs a wallop.

Don'tcha kid?

[GOKU] Hmm.

[BULMA] I'm Bulma. I'm
the brains of the outfit.

Would you forgive me
for hitting you?

We'd appreciate your help.

[GOKU] Sure.

There's a legend
that speaks of a boy who

would come to
liberate our people,

but we always thought
it was just folklore.

[OLD WOMAN] Mm-hmm.

Bulma, it would be the
answer to all my prayers

if you brought my baby back!

[MAN 2] You have my
blessing young warrior.

Your courage stands like a
great monument before my people.

[giggles]

I just thought of a
great way to trap Oolong.

[BULMA] All right!
You look great, kid!

You'd be totally charming
if you smiled a bit more.

There's not much
to smile about.

Can we come up with
a different plan, Bulma?

Sorry, no time, kid!

Gosh, Goku.
You make a real pretty girl.

[BULMA] Now remember Goku,
don't blow your cover.

He has to think
you're Pocowatha.

The important thing is
to find out where

he's keeping the girls.
After that you can handle it

any way you want to.

All right, all right.
I'll do it.

But I'm not going to
like this one little bit!

[distant crash]

Huh?

[SHERMAN] It's Oolong!
He's coming!

[BULMA screaming]

[OOLONG growling]

[VILLAGERS screaming]

[MAN] He's coming!

Oolong's in the village
and he's on his way here!

[BULMA] Good job! Now try
to make sure everyone

gets into their
houses safely!

[MAN] I'll do it!

Okay, it's up to you.
Good luck.

Well, since you're
the brains of this outfit,

you're going to help me, right?

[BULMA] I'll be right here
rooting for you, Goku.

[GOKU] Mmm.

[BULMA] Alright, kid,
it's showtime.

Don't let him get a
good look at your face.

And remember: smile.

[GOKU] Next time, I'm
making the plan.

[OOLONG] I've come for
you, my little buttercup!

I brought you some flowers.

I hope you
like them, sweetheart.

[GOKU] Oh, y-yeah, uh,
I love flowers.

[OOLONG] Huh? Packed
your rolling pin?

[whimpering]

[OOLONG] And I see you've
put on a little weight!

[GOKU] Yeah, well, uh,
l-look who's talking.

You scamp!

[OOLONG] A little feisty
today, aren't we?

Goku! Where did you
learn how to act?!

If you don't shape up,
you're gonna

blow this thing big-time!

Mmm.

That's good,
I like 'em fiesty.

I wouldn't change
anything on you,

except maybe that ugly scarf.

[GOKU] Hm? Uh-oh...

Oh my. You're trembling.

[GOKU] That's because I need
to use the bathroom real bad.

You're scared!

Well, I get my feelings hurt
when girls are scared of me.

[OOLONG] No more! That's it!

[growls]

[whimpering]

[GOKU] Huh?

What do you think of this?

Suave, debonair, handsome.
If you don't like it

I can always change
into something else.

[GOKU chuckles]

[BULMA] Aah!

--[OOLONG] Hmm?
--[GOKU] Huh?

Well, hello there, stranger!
My name's Bulma.

I don't think we've met.

[GOKU] Aah!

My. Can such beauty be real?

You must be a dream.

Nope, I'm all... woman.

[OOLONG] Imagine, if I had
a woman like that...

Oohhh...

Yes. She's a delicious
catch if I ever saw one.

Oh, but what about Pocowatha?

So, uh, when are
you gonna kidnap me

and take me away?

[OOLONG] Ooh, I can't
just leave Pocowatha,

but I'd be crazy to
refuse a girl like that.

Pocowatha or the new girl?
Pocowatha or the new girl?

Pocowatha or the--huh?

Where'd she go?

[OOLONG] What?! Am I seeing
what I think I'm seeing?!

This must be some
mistake! It can't be!

Hmm? Uurgh!

[screaming]

I've been deceived!
You're not Pocowatha!

Huh? What gave me away?
It was my tail, wasn't it?

If there is one thing
I cannot tolerate,

it is deception!

[grunts]

[GOKU] Huh?

[OOLONG laughing]

[GOKU] Man, that's one big cow!

I'm am not a cow,
I am a bull!

Can't you tell the difference?!

And I'm a pretty mean one, too!

Huh? Whoa!

What happened to my polite,
handsome, debonair man

with the really
expensive trench coat?

Excuse me.

This is just too weird!

That monstrous beast
has deceived you, too.

He fools you by changing
into the one thing

that you want most. And in
your case, that's a man.

You should be
ashamed of yourself!

Uh...

The good thing is I don't
think he wants to marry

Pocowatha any more, he
wants to marry you instead.

You'll make a
nice bride, Bulma.

What kind of a girl
do you think I am?!

I'm not getting
married to a bull!

And that's that!

[OOLONG chuckles intensely]

Goku, the plan's off, kiddo!

It's time to take
the bull by the horns!

[GOKU yelling]

Ha!

Now we'll see just
how tough you really are.

Don't forget to find out
where the girls are!

And stay alive, okay?!

Say your prayers, chico,
your time has come!

[OOLONG laughing]

You've reached the end of
the road there, muchacho!

[laughing]

Eh. Smile. Pfft.

[OOLONG yells]

What are you, loco, kid?!

There's still a way
you can save yourself!

Get the señorita!

Forget it, bully!
Come on, let's go!

[OOLONG] Alright, then!
So be it!

A little monkey-boy burrito
might hit the spot anyway!

Sounds yummy!

Look, you can't scare me
like you've scared

everyone else.
I'm not buying it!

[OOLONG] Haven't you noticed?!

You're a little
cucaracha with a stick,

and I am a gigantic bull!

I don't care what you are,
give those girls back now!

[grunts]

[clock chiming]

Uh...I will be back!

[GOKU] Huh?

[GOKU] Hey! Come back
here and fight!

Where are you going?!

[GOKU] Hey, come back!

[GOKU] Huh?

[whistling]

Hey, excuse me.

A giant bull just came
barreling through here.

Did you see where it went?

There.

[GOKU] Ha-ha!

Hi. This is the bonafide one
hundred percent original me.

Believe it or not,
a good-looking guy like myself

has trouble scoring chicks.

That's why I transform.

[OOLONG] The art of
transformation is a very

powerful technique and should
only be used responsibly

to solve serious problems.

In my case, I was being
dogged by girls left and right,

despite my natural cute
and cuddly appearance.

But now that I've gone to
shape-shifting school,

all that's changed.

But the problem is I can only
hold a shape for five minutes,

and then, poof!

That's why I had to
run away from that kid.

[SHERMAN]
You say Oolong ran away?

[BULMA]
Yeah, I saw him take off,

and Goku went after him.

[SHERMAN] Hmm. Remarkable.

What an extraordinary boy.

Yeah. Goku will
chase him a hundred miles

if he has to.

Wow. Maybe it's
the legend after all.

Hey, yo, Oolong.

I know you're out there,
you can't hide forever.

Couldn't find him, huh?

[GOKU] Uh-uh.

[chuckles]

[GOKU] Hey, everybody,
he ran away!

He might just be hiding
though, so look out!

[OOLONG] All right,
here we go again.

But I'd better watch it, or this
kid could ruin a good thing.

If I wanna keep these
simpletons in line,

I'd better come up with
something really fierce.

Wait, I know
a good one... Yeah.

[GOKU] Hmm. I guess he is gone.

[yells]

Uh...!

[OOLONG]
Looking for me, kid?

[laughs]

Did you really think
I would run away?!

[GOKU stammers]

[OOLONG] You seem a
little timid this time.

Well you're lucky, tiny tot,
because I'm feeling generous.

I was going to dunk you
in this hot soup

and eat you like a dumpling,

but if you leave town now,
I will spare you.

I think I'll stay.
So go ahead and eat me...

if you can!

[OOLONG] If I can?!
How dare you--

[crying]

[OOLONG] Look what
you made me do!

[GOKU] What are you
talking about?

I didn't make you do anything!

[OOLONG]
Alright, that does it!

Your luck's run out,
little runt!

I was going to
let you go because

you're not like all
the other cowards,

but now I have no
choice but to destroy--

[wailing]

[WOMAN] Johnny, do you
wanna get yourself killed?!

Ah! You know you've
got a real little monster

on your hands there, lady!

[OOLONG] Kids these days...

Now, where were we?

[GOKU] You were just saying that
you were going to destroy me.

[OOLONG] Oh, yeah,
yeah, right! Thanks, kid!

You know what though?

I don't think you're as
strong as you say you are.

[OOLONG] Rrrrgh!
Listen here:

I'm the fiercest,
most impolite warrior

on the face of the Earth!

[GOKU] Yeah? I doubt it.

[OOLONG] What makes
you think that you're

any match for me?!

I learned karate
from my Grandpa.

[OOLONG] Karate, huh?! Well,
if you're any good at karate,

you could break these
bricks with one hand!

[GOKU] Oh yeah?
Well, I can break them apart

with one finger! Watch this!

[OOLONG] Huh?!

[GOKU laughing]

[OOLONG] Do you know
what I do to people

who can do that?!

[shrill laughter]

[OOLONG]
Nothing! Later, sucker!

Hey, where're ya going?!

Hey, don't just stand there!
Go after him, kid!

If he gets away, we'll never
find out where the girls are!

Oh, you're right.
Hmm. Nimbus!

Good luck!

Amazing!

It's our legend that an
evil monster would be--

toppled over
by a mere boy

who could dance
on the clouds.

That kid was a
royal pain in the kiester!

Too bad he doesn't
know how to fly!

[chuckles]

[GOKU] Hey, Oolong!

[screams]

Where do you think
you're going?!

[OOLONG] So long, sucker!

[GOKU] Oh, no you don't!

[panting]

[GOKU] Here I come!

[GOKU] I'm gaining
on you, Oolong!

[GOKU] I won't let you
get away, you know.

[OOLONG] Oh no!
My five minutes...

are up!

[yells]

[OOLONG yelling]

[OOLONG] I'm not ready to die!

That's because you
haven't been being good.

And who the heck
are you? My psychiatrist?!

Well, now, porky,

what do you have to
say for yourself?

An apology
would be nice.

All right, then! I'm sorry.

I can't believe I's
scared of that pig...

Now where's my grandaughter

and the rest of the girls?

They're... home.

What home?!

Look, pal.

Your reign of terror is over,
capiche?! Now tell us!

Bulma, you're really brave
now that Oolong's tied up.

♪ Doot doo-doo... ♪

♪

Hey! If you're planning on
turning into a bug,

forget it! I'll squash ya!

[OOLONG groans]

Where exactly is
this shack of yours?

Is it far?

Here's my little shack.

[gong crash]

Awesome!

You don't see houses like
that every day, do you?

What a palace!

[GOKU] How'd you get
such a big place?

Well, it wasn't easy, kiddo.

I had to rip off
a lot of people.

And you're proud of that?

[MAN] Little Flower, it's me!

Your Poo-Paw is here!

[MAN 2] Alexi!

[WOMAN] Mother's here, Sarah!

[MAN] You're safe now,
sweetheart!

Don't worry, girls!
We're coming!

[WOMAN] Huh?! Sarah!
Is that you?!

[MAN 2] Alexi!
What are you doing?!

Oh, hi, Daddy.
What's happening?

Sorry, I didn't write, Mommy.
I've been super busy.

Me, too. Man, time has
just been flying by.

[BULMA] Did you find them?

--[GOKU] Huh?
--[OOLONG] Hi, girls.

[ALEXI] Oh, hi snookums!
Oh, before I forget,

I'm totally out of pink
lipstick and red nail polish.

[SARAH] And I need
a new hair-dryer.

[LITTLE FLOWER] Did you bring
the diet drinks I asked you for?

I was hoping
these girls would cook

and take care of my house,
but they won't.

All they wanna do
is lay around.

Take them off my hands.
Pretty please?

[gasping]

Well, this belongs
to you and Goku now.

Wow, you made our day!

[BULMA] Just two more to go and
then I can call the Dragon

to make my wish!