Doogie Howser, M.D. (1989–1993): Season 1, Episode 6 - Simply Irresistible - full transcript

Man: ♪ YOU ARE THE
SUNSHINE OF MY LIFE... ♪

- BRING HIM IN HERE.
- ♪ WHOA ♪

♪ THAT'S WHY I'LL
ALWAYS BE AROUND... ♪

- HERE, LET'S TAKE A LOOK.
- ♪ YOU ARE THE APPLE
OF MY EYE... ♪

- WHAT DO WE HAVE?
- MULTIPLE LACERATIONS OF
THE DISTAL FOREARM AND HAND.

MR. WONDER HERE HAS
BEEN DOING A LITTLE CRACK.

PUT HIS ARM THROUGH A
PLATE-GLASS WINDOW DOWN IN VENICE.

- JUST GET HIM BACK.
- ♪ THIS IS THE BEGINNING... ♪

EASY, PAL. WE'RE JUST
GONNA LOOK AT YOUR ARM.

- I'M A BIG FAN OF YOURS.
- YOU THINK WITH HOSPITALS
CHARGING A FORTUNE,

- AT LEAST THEY COULD GIVE
YOU AIR CONDITIONING.
- TELL ME ABOUT IT.



THIS IS THE THIRD
TIME THIS MONTH.

WHY AM I ALWAYS WORKING WHEN
THE AIR CONDITIONING GOES DOWN?

- JUST LUCKY I GUESS.
- I THOUGHT YOU WERE OFF.

PEREZ CALLED IN SICK. I'VE
BEEN HERE FOR 36 HOURS.

MORE LIGHT, PLEASE.

♪ THAT'S WHY I'LL
ALWAYS BE AROUND ♪

♪ YOU... ♪

FREEZE!

I'LL KILL HIM! I'LL KILL HIM!

PUT DOWN THE KNIFE.

I'VE GOT HIM.

- Nurse: HERE'S A PILLOW.
- Officer: Watch his head.

- I GOT IT.
- CALL SECURITY!

- YOU OKAY?
- YEAH.



FINE. YOU?

PIECE OF CAKE.

I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS. I
SHOWERED TWO MINUTES AGO

AND I'M DRENCHED ALREADY. WHEN
ARE THEY GONNA FIX THE DAMN A.C.?

HEY, DOOG. I JUST HEARD
ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED.

UNBELIEVABLE. ARE YOU OKAY?

YEAH, I GUESS.

- YOU GOT A DATE?
- UH-HUH.

MAYBE YOU OUGHT TO
JUST GO HOME, CHILL OUT.

NO WAY.

CHECK IT OUT... MY TICKET
TO THE STONES CONCERT.

16th ROW. I'VE HAD IT
FOR THREE MONTHS.

WELL, I'VE GOT SOME
GOOD NEWS AND BAD NEWS.

- THEN HURRY.
- THE GOOD NEWS IS
THE CONCERT WAS GREAT.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN WAS?

THAT'S THE BAD NEWS.

IT WAS LAST NIGHT.

HECTOR GONZALES, AGE 13.

BROUGHT TO EASTMAN THREE
DAYS AGO FROM GUATEMALA

BY THE ST. PETER'S
HOLY CROSS MISSION.

OVER THE LAST SIX MONTHS HE HAD
EXHIBITED PROGRESSIVE MOTOR DEFICITS

IN THE LOWER EXTREMITIES,

INCLUDING LOSS OF
BLADDER AND BOWEL FUNCTION

EVENTUALLY LEADING
TO TOTAL PARALYSIS.

DR. GORING FELT IT UNNECESSARY

TO DO AN M.R.I. OR ANY SKIN
TESTS FOR POSSIBLE INFECTION.

YESTERDAY HE ORDERED A CAT SCAN.

AND AS I SUSPECTED WE HAVE
A SPACE-OCCUPYING LESION

IN THE LEFT TEMPORAL LOBE
WITH BRAINSTEM PRESSURE.

IT'S STRAIGHTFORWARD.
A STANDARD CRANIOTOMY.

I'VE SCHEDULED SURGERY
FOR TOMORROW AFTERNOON.

- ANY QUESTIONS?
- Doogie: YES, SIR.

HOW CAN WE BE SURE IT'S
NOT AN INFLAMMATORY MASS?

WE NEVER DID A COMPLETE WORK-UP.

THERE WAS NO TIME. THIS KID'S
CONDITION IS DETERIORATING RAPIDLY.

THE PICTURES TELL THE STORY.

THAT TUMOR COMES
OUT OR HE'S GOING TO DIE.

- GOOD MORNING.
- Buenos días, DR. HOWSER.

Buenos días, MR. GONZALES.
HOW IS EVERYONE TODAY?

- FINE.
- HOW ARE YOU FEELING,
YOUNG MAN?

DOOGIE.

WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?

HECTOR'S FAMILY. THEY
ARRIVED YESTERDAY.

WHAT ARE THEY DOING
IN HOSPITAL GOWNS?

SOCIAL SERVICES SAID IT WOULD TAKE
TWO WEEKS TO FIND THEM A PLACE TO STAY.

THEY HAVE NO MONEY,
SO I ADMITTED THEM.

ARE YOU CRAZY? IF CANFIELD
FINDS OUT, HE'LL KILL YOU.

HE'LL NEVER KNOW. THEY'RE IN THE
COMPUTER UNDER A BUNCH OF ALIASES.

COME ON. I'VE HEARD OF SOME
PRETTY DUMB IDEAS, BUT THIS IS...

WHO IS THAT?

Doogie: MARIA. HECTOR'S SISTER.

SHE'S INCREDIBLE.
HOWSER, YOU'RE A GENIUS!

THANK YOU FOR THE
BASEBALL CARDS, DOCTOR.

BUT HECTOR HAS HAD
MANY SORES IN HIS MOUTH.

CHEWING GUM IS A PROBLEM.

HERPES ENCEPHALITIS? COME
ON, DR. HOWSER, YOU'RE REACHING.

A LOT OF PEOPLE HAVE HERPES SORES IN
THEIR MOUTH AND DON'T GET ENCEPHALITIS.

HE'S HAD A FEVER SINCE HE GOT
HERE. HOW DO YOU ACCOUNT FOR THAT?

THE TUMOR'S NECROTIC. THE
EXPANSION'S CAUSING PRESSURE.

JUST LOOK AT HIS EYE GROUNDS.

MAYBE, BUT CAN YOU TELL
ME YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY SURE?

DR. GORING, ALL I ASK IS WE
HOLD OFF SURGERY FOR A DAY.

I KNOW A SPINAL TAP IS OUT,
BUT IF I DO A CISTERNA MAGNA TAP

THEN WE'LL KNOW FOR SURE.

- I AM SURE, DOCTOR.
- COME ON.

LOOK. ALL MY INSTINCTS
TELL ME I'M RIGHT,

BUT JUST TO SATISFY YOUR
CURIOSITY, GO PERFORM YOUR TEST.

HOWEVER, HIS SURGERY STAYS
SCHEDULED FOR TOMORROW AFTERNOON.

NOW LET'S MOVE ON.

EXCUSE ME. DR. HOWSER?
MY NAME IS GARRET PRICE.

- AND THIS IS MY PARTNER
DR. ALLEN BRADY.
- HI.

- NICE TO MEET YOU.
- WE COULDN'T HELP
BUT OVERHEAR

YOUR DEBATE WITH DR. GORING.
WE WERE VERY IMPRESSED.

- WE'VE HEARD A LOT ABOUT YOU.
- ALLEN AND I OWN THE BRENTWOOD
PEDIATRIC GROUP,

AND WE WERE WONDERING IF WE
COULD TAKE YOU TO LUNCH TODAY.

- SURE.
- GREAT.

"OPIE TAYLOR."

"LORI PARTRIDGE."

"THURSTON HOWELL III."

- I OWN A TELEVISION.
- I CAN EXPLAIN.

YOU MADE AN UNAUTHORIZED
ENTRY INTO THE COMPUTER

IN TOTAL DISREGARD
OF HOSPITAL PROCEDURE.

THERE WAS NOWHERE
FOR THEM TO GO.

WE HAVE SOCIAL SERVICES
TO HANDLE THESE MATTERS.

THEY HANDLED IT. THEY TOLD THEM
TO FILL OUT THE PAPERWORK AND WAIT.

- WAIT WHERE?
- HOW ABOUT THE WAITING ROOM?

THAT'S WHAT THEY'RE THERE FOR.

I WISH WE COULD ACCOMMODATE
THEM, BUT WE'RE NOT RUNNING A HOTEL.

THOSE BEDS ARE FOR
PEOPLE WHO NEED THEM.

BOTTOM LINE, YOU USED BAD
JUDGMENT, AND I'M GROWING TIRED OF IT.

- IS THAT ALL?
- YES! THAT'S ALL!

IT'S A JOKE. CANFIELD'S
SO CAUGHT UP

IN HOSPITAL RED TAPE, HE
CAN'T SEE WHAT'S IMPORTANT.

IF IT HADN'T BEEN FOR HECTOR'S FAMILY, I
MIGHT NEVER HAVE MADE THAT DIAGNOSIS.

- YOU STILL COULD BE WRONG.
- UH-UH. IF HE'S GOT A TUMOR,
I'LL EAT YOUR NAME TAG.

LET IT GO, GUY. YOU'RE BENT OUT
OF SHAPE BECAUSE OF THE HEAT.

- WE ALL ARE.
- IT'S NOT JUST THE HEAT,
IT'S EVERYTHING.

SOMEONE I'M TRYING TO
SAVE ALMOST KILLS ME,

I'VE WORKED 40 OUT
OF THE LAST 48 HOURS,

WANDA'S NOT SPEAKING TO ME BECAUSE I
NEVER SHOWED UP AT THE STONES CONCERT,

AND I HAVE TO DO A DANCE TO
GET ANYONE TO LISTEN TO ME HERE.

SUCH IS THE LIFE OF A
SECOND-YEAR RESIDENT.

YOU'LL JUST GET USED TO
IT. YOU CAN'T JUST LEAVE.

WHY NOT? WHO WOULD
CARE IF I WAS GONE?

- I'LL TALK TO YOU LATER.
- HEY, DOOGIE.

I JUST WANT YOU TO
KNOW I WOULD CARE.

THINGS WOULDN'T BE
THE SAME WITHOUT YOU.

- THANKS, JACK.
- I MEAN, YOU'RE
A GREAT DOCTOR.

- I THINK PEOPLE
SHOULD REALIZE THAT.
- WHAT DO YOU WANT, JACK?

- THE KID'S SISTER, MARIA.
- NO WAY.

I'VE GOT TO MEET
HER. SHE'S AN ANGEL.

YOU KNOW SPANISH
BETTER THAN I DO.

JUST TELL HER WHAT
A GREAT GUY I AM

AND THAT I'D BE INTERESTED IN
TAKING HER TO DINNER. MUY INTERESTED.

FORGET IT. MARIA IS A SWEET,
INNOCENT CATHOLIC GIRL.

- I KNOW.
- I WOULDN'T FEED HER
TO A SHARK LIKE YOU.

- DOOGIE.
- JACK, I'VE GOTTA GO.

I'M GONNA DO THIS WITH
OR WITHOUT YOUR HELP.

COME ON, DOOGIE. PLEASE?

KEITH RICHARDS WAS GREAT, AND
JAGGER'S VOICE SOUNDED AS GOOD AS EVER.

- TOO BAD YOU MISSED IT.
- YOU'RE TELLING ME.

LOOK. IF YOU EVER NEED TICKETS
FOR ANYTHING, LET US KNOW.

A GUY FROM CAPITOL RECORDS
BRING HIS KIDS TO SEE US.

ALL RIGHT, ENOUGH OF
THE ROLLING STONES.

LET ME TELL HIM WHY
WE ASKED HIM TO LUNCH.

DOOGIE, STOP ME IF I'M WRONG.

YOU WORK 24-HOUR
SHIFTS, YOU SLEEP ON A COT,

YOU SHOWER WITH YOUR BEEPER
AND IF YOU DIVIDE YOUR PAY

BY THE HOURS YOU WORK,
YOU BARELY TOP MINIMUM WAGE.

- YOU GOT IT.
- Brady: YOU HAVE
A GIRLFRIEND?

I THINK SO.

- YOU JUST BREAK
ANOTHER DATE?
- YEAH.

WE'VE ALL BEEN THERE.
LET ME ASK YOU SOMETHING.

WHAT IF YOU COULD WORK AT A FIRST-RATE
FACILITY WITH MINIMUM ON-CALL TIME?

A PLACE THAT OFFERED A PENSION AND
PROFIT-SHARING PLAN SECOND TO NONE,

AND IT COVERED ALL
MALPRACTICE INSURANCE.

- WOULD YOU
BE INTERESTED?
- SURE,

BUT I STILL HAVE ANOTHER
YEAR TO GO ON MY RESIDENCY.

EASTMAN IS AN OUTSTANDING
TEACHING HOSPITAL,

AND THEIR RESIDENCY
PROGRAM IS TOP-NOTCH.

BUT WE'LL BE STRAIGHT WITH YOU.

ONE OF THE REASONS
WE WANT YOU NOW

IS THAT YOU'RE ONE OF A KIND.

A 16-YEAR-OLD IN A PEDIATRIC
PRACTICE IS LIKE GOLD.

AND IF YOU WANT TO BECOME
A CARDIOLOGIST OR WHATEVER,

IN FOUR YEARS YOU WOULD STILL BE
THE YOUNGEST RESIDENT IN THE COUNTRY.

WE'RE PREPARED TO OFFER
YOU $100,000 A YEAR TO START...

WITH AN OPTION TO BECOME A FULL
PARTNER AT THE CONCLUSION OF THAT YEAR.

PLUS, OF COURSE, THE USE
OF OUR BEACH HOUSE IN MALIBU

AND SIX WEEKS VACATION.
DID YOU GET TO GO

- TO EUROPE
AFTER COLLEGE?
- I WAS 10.

OH. RIGHT.

WELL, NOW YOU'LL GET A CHANCE.

LOOK. WE DON'T WANT
TO HARD SELL YOU HERE.

WE JUST WANT YOU TO COME SEE
OUR PLACE. WE THINK YOU'LL LIKE IT.

HI, DR. PRICE. HI, DR. BRADY.

- HI, KELLY.
- HELLO.

- WHO WAS THAT?
- Brady: KELLY... ONE OF OUR NURSES.

IT'S HER DAY OFF. SHE'S A TWIN.

DAD, WE'RE TALKING
ABOUT $100,000

PLUS A PARTNERSHIP
AFTER ONE YEAR.

THIS IS NOT ABOUT MONEY,
THIS ABOUT YOUR EDUCATION.

YOU HAVE MADE A COMMITMENT TO EASTMAN, AND
I THINK YOU ARE BETTER SERVED KEEPING IT.

BUT THIS IS A CHANCE FOR
ME TO HAVE A NORMAL LIFE.

I MAY EVEN GET TO SEE WANDA
MORE THAN ONCE A MONTH.

YOU DON'T BECOME A TOP PHYSICIAN
BY TAKING SHORTCUTS, YOUNG MAN.

THIS IS NOT A SHORTCUT.
THESE ARE TWO

WELL-RESPECTED DOCTORS
WITH A GREAT PRACTICE.

IF YOU ASK ME, I THINK THEY
HAVE TENDERED THIS OFFER

AS A MEANS OF
EXPLOITING YOUR AGE.

THAT'S NOT TRUE. THEY WERE
TOTALLY UP-FRONT ABOUT THAT.

- AND THAT MAKES IT BETTER?
- I KNOW WHAT I'M GETTING
MYSELF INTO.

I'M NOT SURE YOU DO.

LOOK. THIS CHOICE
IS YOURS TO MAKE.

IT IS NOT LEGITIMATELY
A PARENTAL DECISION.

BUT, I'D BE LYING
IF I DIDN'T TELL YOU

THAT I'D BE VERY DISAPPOINTED
IF YOU ACCEPTED THEIR OFFER.

RIGHT. IN OTHER
WORDS, IF I ACCEPT,

YOU'LL NEVER FORGIVE ME.

AND IF I DON'T ACCEPT,
I'LL FEEL YOU BULLIED ME.

SO I'M DAMNED IF I DO
AND DAMNED IF I DON'T.

THANKS A LOT.

WHAT DID I SAY?

DID I SAY NO? I DIDN'T SAY NO.

TO BE HONEST WITH YOU, I FIND A LOT
OF VALIDITY IN WHAT HE WAS SAYING.

WHAT WOULD BE SO TERRIBLE ABOUT
DOOGIE GOING INTO PRIVATE PRACTICE?

FOR ONE THING, HE HAS A
COMMITMENT TO EASTMAN.

HE'S ALSO OVERWORKED, OVERSTRESSED
AND EXHAUSTED ALL THE TIME.

HE'S 16 YEARS OLD,
AND HE'S BURNING OUT.

MY GOD, DAVID. WHEN HE TOLD US
ABOUT BEING HELD AT KNIFE POINT,

I HAD TO FIGHT OFF EVERY IMPULSE
TO STOP HIM FROM GOING BACK THERE.

ALL RIGHT, I'M NOT
GOING TO BREAK HIS ARM,

BUT I FEEL WHAT I FEEL.

I'LL TALK WITH HIM.

DOOGIE?

SON?

- BRANDON?
- Child: HERE! HERE!

HERE! HERE!

BRANDON TARTIKOFF?

AIR CONDITIONING.

- HI, KELLY.
- NO, I'M KATIE.

OH. I'M HERE TO SEE
DOCTORS BRADY AND PRICE.

ARE YOU A NEW PATIENT?

ACTUALLY, I'M DOCTOR HOWSER.

OH, RIGHT, I'M SORRY. FOLLOW ME.

DR. HOWSER, WELCOME.

- SEE YOU LATER.
- BYE.

I SEE YOU MET KATIE.

- HOW DO YOU LIKE OUR PLACE?
- IT'S GREAT.

- BYE, TIFFANY. HELLO, DOCTOR.
- BYE.

- GETTING THE TOUR?
- YEAH.

LET'S SEE. WE HAVE
EIGHT EXAMINATION ROOMS.

LAB, X-RAY, NEO-NATAL, AND,
OF COURSE, YOUR OWN OFFICE.

NOT A BAD WAY TO
PRACTICE MEDICINE.

KELLY?

DOCTOR, THE IGER BOY IS REFUSING
TO TAKE HIS ALLERGY SHOT AGAIN.

- Boy:
NO, I DON'T WANT A SHOT.
- COME ON.

- YOU CAN DO IT.
- NO.

- UH, I'M SORRY.
- IT'S OKAY.

- DO YOU MIND?
- NO, GO RIGHT AHEAD.

WAIT A MINUTE.
WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?

IT'S ALL RIGHT, MRS. IGER. THIS
IS OUR COLLEAGUE DR. HOWSER.

HI, I'M DR. HOWSER. MY
FRIENDS CALL ME DOOGIE.

- WHAT'S YOUR NAME?
- BOBBY.

BOBBY, I THINK YOU LOST THIS.

Mrs. Iger: OOH.

HAVE YOU EVER PLAYED A VIDEO
GAME CALLED ZELDA, BOBBY?

YOU KNOW WHEN YOU
GET TO THE FINAL DOOR

AND THE PRINCESS
IS RIGHT INSIDE,

BUT ALL YOU HAVE LEFT
IS YOUR SILVER ARROW?

- YEAH.
- YOU'RE A LITTLE AFRAID,
BUT YOU'VE GOT TO DECIDE.

DO YOU GO BACK AND GET MORE
HEARTS OR DO YOU GO FORWARD

- WITH JUST
YOUR SILVER ARROW?
- YOU GO FORWARD.

- YOU GOTTA WIN
THE PRINCESS.
- THAT'S RIGHT.

WELL, THIS IS YOUR
SILVER ARROW, BOBBY.

NOW, IF YOU'RE GOING TO WIN THE
PRINCESS, YOU'VE GOT TO TAKE THIS SHOT.

DO YOU UNDERSTAND?

SO WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO?

TAKE THE SHOT.

ALL RIGHT.

JUST CLOSE YOUR EYES.

THAT'S IT.

YOU DID IT.

BOBBY, I AM SO PROUD OF YOU.

- THANK YOU.
- WILL YOU BE HERE
NEXT TIME?

I DON'T KNOW.

MAYBE.

DOOGIE, I HAVE ONE
PIECE OF ADVICE:

REAL ESTATE.

MY BROTHER JUST MADE A KILLING
ON HIS CONDO IN SANTA MONICA.

SLOW DOWN. HE HASN'T
EVEN TAKEN THE JOB YET.

SAVE IT, McGUIRE.

WE DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT.

- YOU WENT OUT WITH HER.
- YEAH, I TOOK HER TO DINNER.

- IT WAS NICE.
- OH RIGHT. SURE.

COME ON. I WAS A
PERFECT GENTLEMEN.

WHAT? YOU DON'T THINK I CAN
HAVE AN HONEST RELATIONSHIP?

McGUIRE, YOUR IDEA OF
AN HONEST RELATIONSHIP

IS SLEEPING WITH THE SAME
SPECIES FOR AN ENTIRE WEEKEND.

Jack: YOU KNOW, I'M INSULTED.

WITH MARIA IT'S DIFFERENT.
IT DOESN'T MATTER

THAT WE DON'T SPEAK
THE SAME LANGUAGE.

I DIDN'T TOUCH HER.

OF COURSE, TONIGHT
I'M GOING TO TOUCH HER,

AND I'M GOING TO
LET HER TOUCH ME.

YOU ARE A SLIMEBALL, McGUIRE.

THAT GUY GETS AWAY WITH MURDER.

Dr. Howser, please report
to Dr. Canfield's office.

UH-OH.

COME IN.

- YOU WANTED
TO SEE ME?
- YES.

LOOKS LIKE YOU WERE RIGHT
ABOUT THE GONZALES BOY.

YES!

- I KNEW IT.
- CONGRATULATIONS, DOCTOR.

WE STARTED HIM ON
ACYCLOVIR THIS MORNING.

WE'LL KNOW SOON ENOUGH HOW
HE RESPONDS TO THE MEDICATION.

YOU MAY HAVE JUST
SAVED THAT BOY'S LIFE.

HOPEFULLY, HE'LL WALK AGAIN.

DOUGLAS, YOU'LL HAVE TO FORGIVE

OUR SOMETIMES
INAPPROPRIATE SKEPTICISM.

YOU HAVE ALL THE CONFIDENCE
IN THE WORLD IN YOUR GENIUS.

BUT FOR US, IT'S SOMETIMES
HARD TO FORGET YOU'RE JUST A BOY.

I'M NOT ASKING FOR PREFERENTIAL
TREATMENT, DR. CANFIELD.

AND I'M NOT OFFERING
ANY, DR. HOWSER.

WHAT I'M TRYING TO SAY IS WE
MAY OCCASIONALLY STEP IN IT,

BUT WE HOLD YOU
IN VERY HIGH REGARD.

THANKS.

BY THE WAY, I SPOKE
WITH YOUR FATHER.

HE TOLD ME YOU'VE
BEEN APPROACHED

BY THE BRENTWOOD
PEDIATRIC GROUP.

- HAVE YOU MET
WITH THESE PEOPLE?
- YEAH, I HAVE.

THEN I SUPPOSE YOU'RE
CONSIDERING THEIR OFFER.

ACTUALLY, I'VE PRETTY
MUCH MADE UP MY MIND.

I'M GOING TO ACCEPT.

UH-HUH.

IF I MAY, I'D LIKE TO
MAKE ONE OBSERVATION.

YOU HAVE A MIND LIKE
A SPONGE, DOUGLAS.

YOU HAVE THE CAPACITY TO ABSORB MORE
IN A WEEK THAN MOST OF US DO IN A YEAR.

A MIND LIKE YOURS
NEEDS TO BE CHALLENGED.

EASTMAN MAY NOT BE THE
MOST LUXURIOUS PLACE TO WORK,

BUT I GUARANTEE YOU THE
QUALITY AND COMPLEXITY

OF WHAT YOU'LL LEARN
HERE CANNOT BE MATCHED.

IT'S HIGHLY UNLIKELY YOU'LL
COME ACROSS A HECTOR GONZALES

AT THE BRENTWOOD
PEDIATRIC GROUP.

SO YOU'RE REALLY LEAVING, HUH?

WE'RE GONNA MISS
YOU AROUND HERE.

YOU STILL NOT TALKING TO ME?

HEY SPORT, LOOK AT IT THIS WAY,

IT'S MY DUTY TO
GO OUT WITH MARIA.

IT'S LIKE A HANGING CURVE BALL.

YOU GOTTA GO DEEP.

HE IS.

- WHAT? WHAT?
- WHOA. WAIT A MINUTE.

DEAD? WHAT'S THIS ABOUT DEAD?

HE'S MARIA'S FIANCE.
HE SAID YOU SOILED HER.

YOU'RE MAKING A BIG
MISTAKE. WE'RE JUST AMIGOS.

DOOGIE, TELL HIM.

WHAT DID HE SAY?

BAD NEWS, JACK. HE WANTS
TO CUT OUT YOUR HEART.

PLEASE, MAN! DON'T HURT ME!

I NEVER TOUCHED HER.
I SWEAR. I'M INNOCENT!

FOR GOD'S SAKE, I'M A DOCTOR!

HEY, JACK, MEET TONY.

HE'S A NEW ORDERLY UPSTAIRS.

NICE TO MEET YOU, JACK.

- EXCELLENT.
- "FOR GOD'S SAKE,
I'M A DOCTOR!"

- MR. GONZALES,
YOU WANTED TO SEE ME?
- NO.

HMM. SOMEBODY BEEPED ME.

MR. GONZALES, DR. HOWSER,
COULD YOU ALL FOLLOW ME PLEASE?

WAIT.

YOU SET THIS UP, DIDN'T YOU?

Canfield: WHO? ME?

IT'S PRETTY MANIPULATIVE.

ALL RIGHT, LET ME GET THIS
STRAIGHT. YOU PASSED UP $100,000

PLUS SIX MONTHS VACATION
AND A BEACH HOUSE WITH TWINS?

- YEAH.
- YOU'RE SICKER
THAN I THOUGHT, HOWSER.

- I MEAN, TWINS.
- SOME THINGS ARE
MORE IMPORTANT, VINNY.

- LIKE WHAT?
- LIKE HELPING PEOPLE
THAT REALLY NEED HELP.

- I BET.
- MY DAD WAS RIGHT. MONEY'S NOT EVERYTHING.

SINCE WHEN HAVE YOU
LISTENED TO YOUR OLD MAN?

HE'S NOT ALWAYS A REKNOB.

OH! OH!

- IS DOOGIE HOME?
- YEAH.

AND GUESS WHAT, DEAR? I
AM NOT ALWAYS A REKNOB.

CONGRATULATIONS, DAVID.

CATHERINE, WHAT'S A REKNOB?

YOU SURE I CAN'T
CHANGE YOUR MIND?

- I'M SURE, VIN.
- IT'S YOUR LIFE.

YOU WANT TO MISS OUT ON
THE FINER THINGS, BE MY GUEST.

I'M OUT OF HERE.

GOOD NIGHT, VINNY.

TWINS. I'M NEVER
GONNA SLEEP TONIGHT.