Doogie Howser, M.D. (1989–1993): Season 1, Episode 12 - Every Dog Has His Doogie - full transcript

Doogie, upset at the hospital's lack of compassion and adherence to a strict budget, decides to sneak in a dog with a broken leg and operate on it. When he gets caught, his job becomes at risk.

LOOK AT HIM. HIS SKIN,
HIS EYES, HE'S JAUNDICED.

IT COULD BE HEPATITIS, A STONE,
HEMOLYTIC ANEMIA, CANCER, SEPSIS, ANYTHING.

WE'VE GOT TO ADMIT
HIM AND RUN SOME TESTS.

I'M SORRY, DR. HOWSER.

HE DOESN'T HAVE AN ADDRESS,
NO SOCIAL SECURITY, NO INSURANCE

AND HE ONLY GOES BY THE
NAME OF JUPITER. NOW COME ON.

- HE'S A HUMAN BEING. ISN'T THAT ENOUGH?
- NOT IN THIS HOSPITAL.

Dr. Ohada to C.C.U., code blue.
Dr. Ohada to C.C.U., code blue.

GO TO THE COUNTY HEALTH
CARE CENTER. THIS IS THE ADDRESS.

ASK FOR DR. BENNETT. HE'S
A GOOD BUDDY. AND... UH...

HERE, TAKE THE NUMBER
THREE BUS. I'M SORRY.



All new interns report
to O.R. 3 for observation.

- JUST DOING MY JOB.
- MISS McCORMACK,

YOU KNOW THAT PINK ORGAN DONOR CARD
AT THE BACK OF YOUR DRIVER'S LICENSE?

- YES, I HAVE ONE.
- SCRATCH OFF HEART.

DR. HOWSER?

CAN I SEE YOU IN
THERE FOR A MINUTE?

I UNDERSTAND YOUR FRUSTRATION,
BUT DON'T KILL THE MESSENGER.

SHE'S JUST DOING HER JOB.

THIS IS THE FOURTH HOMELESS
PERSON I'VE TURNED AWAY TODAY.

WE'RE NOT TALKING
CUTS AND BRUISES HERE.

THERE'S A FLU EPIDEMIC OUT
THERE. THESE PEOPLE COULD DIE.

THERE ARE COUNTY
FACILITIES, DOUGLAS.

HOW ARE THEY GONNA GET
THERE? THEY HAVE NO MONEY.

I'M ON YOUR SIDE, EMOTIONALLY.



BUT ECONOMICALLY, I HAVE
A BUDGET TO ANSWER TO.

HOW CAN YOU JUSTIFY SPENDING A
MILLION DOLLARS ON A BILIARY LITHOTRIPTER,

WHEN WE'RE TURNING AWAY
PEOPLE TO DIE IN A DOORWAY?

I WISH WE COULD DO BOTH, DOCTOR.

BUT THE REALITY IS, WHEN
PEOPLE DONATE A MILLION DOLLARS,

THEY WANT THEIR NAMES ON A
SHINY GOLD PLAQUE NAILED TO A WALL.

AND UNFORTUNATELY, MONEY TALKS.

Dr. Canfield, please
report to the boardroom.

AND WHEN MONEY
TALKS, I HAVE TO LISTEN.

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HOW IS IT, DR. CANFIELD,
THAT YOU'RE RUNNING

AN AVERAGE OCCUPANCY OF 90%

WITH A GROSS INCOME
OF OVER $200 MILLION,

AND YET YOUR BOTTOM LINE IS
BARELY 1/10 OF 1% IN THE BLACK?

MARGERIE, THIRD-PARTY
CARRIERS ARE CUTTING BACK

ON WHAT THEY'RE PAYING,
LEAVING US WITH A LOT OF BAD DEBTS.

ADDITIONALLY, MEDICARE PATIENTS
MAKE UP OVER 50% OF OUR ADMISSIONS.

AND RIGHT NOW, MEDICARE
IS PAYING LESS THAN COST.

WE ALL KNOW ABOUT MEDICARE, BUT
YOU STILL HAVE A HUGE GROSS INCOME.

WE ALSO HAVE HUGE EXPENSES.

WHY AREN'T WE MORE AGGRESSIVE?
WE NEED MORE FUNDRAISERS,

SOMETHING TO GET OUR
CHARITABLE CONTRIBUTIONS UP.

YOU'LL NOTE THAT ON PAGE 11,

ANTHONY J. COSTALDO
GAVE US TWO MILLION,

MICHAEL FINETTI GAVE US 500,000.

OVERALL OUR
CONTRIBUTIONS ARE UP 4%.

BARELY INFLATION, BEN. WE
SHOULD BE DOING MUCH BETTER.

I, FOR ONE, WOULD LIKE TO SEE
WHERE THESE DOLLARS ARE GOING.

THE RECONSTRUCTION OF THE
EAST WING, AMONG OTHER THINGS.

IT'S NOW ONE OF THE MOST
TECHNICALLY ADVANCED...

- SHOW US.
- VERY WELL.

WE'LL SET UP AN
APPOINTMENT FOR, LET'S SAY...

- 8:00 TOMORROW MORNING?
- 8:00 TOMORROW MORNING.

BERNICE, CANCEL MY 3:00
PROCTOLOGY APPOINTMENT.

I THINK I JUST HAD IT.

- Boy: PLEASE, IT'S JUST A DOG.
- Nurse: I'M SORRY.

HE'S MY FRIEND.
HE'S MY ONLY FRIEND.

HONEY, I'M SORRY, WE
CAN'T HAVE HIM HERE.

YOU HAVE TO TAKE
THE DOG OUTSIDE.

Boy: THERE'S NO ONE ELSE
OUT THERE TO HELP ME.

Nurse: WE DON'T HAVE THE
MEANS TO TAKE CARE OF YOUR DOG.

- THIS IS A HOSPITAL, ISN'T IT?
- I'LL HANDLE THIS.

- BUT...
- DON'T EVEN SAY IT.

- WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?
- HE'S GONNA DIE.

TAKE IT EASY, JUST
TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED.

I WAS ON MY BIKE, RUSS
WAS RUNNING ALONGSIDE,

THEN ALL OF A
SUDDEN HE WAS GONE.

HE MUST HAVE GOTTEN TOO FAR
BEHIND ME. I HEARD THE BRAKES,

AND THEN I SAW THIS CAR
HIT HIM AND KEEP ON GOING.

WHY DON'T YOU
TAKE HIM TO THE VET?

I DON'T HAVE ANY MONEY.

PLEASE, YOU GOTTA HELP HIM.

Doogie: DOESN'T LOOK TOO BAD.

CLEAN FRACTURE LINE RIGHT
ACROSS THE NECK OF THE FEMUR.

Jack: NEEDS A LITTLE REDUCTION,

BUT THE FRAGMENTS
ARE IN GOOD POSITION.

YEAH, NO JOINT REPLACEMENT
NECESSARY. IT COULD EASILY BE PINNED.

HOW DID YOU GET THIS
MUTT THROUGH X-RAY?

HEAVY SEDATION. PLUS,
CASMIR WAS ON DUTY.

I HAD TO THROW IN A PAIR
OF MY DAD'S LAKER TICKETS.

- SO WHAT'S YOUR PLAN, DOOG?
- RIGHT NOW I'VE GOT
TO STABILIZE HIM,

GET HIM OUT OF SHOCK. BUT IT'S A
CLEAN BREAK, SHOULD BE EASY TO REPAIR.

- WHO'S GONNA DO IT?
- WE ARE.

- WE? NOW HOLD IT.
- WHAT ABOUT A VET?

ARE YOU KIDDING? DO YOU
KNOW WHAT A VET WOULD COST?

SURGERY, BOARDING THE
ANIMAL. WE'RE TALKING OVER $1,000.

HOW ARE YOU GONNA
GET A DOG INTO THE O.R.?

NUMBER FOUR.

THE WORKERS HAVEN'T QUITE
FINISHED THE OBSERVATION GALLERY,

BUT THE ROOM IS TOTALLY
FUNCTIONAL AND READY.

WE'LL PROBABLY NEED SOME LIGHTS.

AND MEYERS IS A DOG FREAK, I'M SURE
WE CAN GET HIM TO DO THE ANESTHESIA.

WITH YOU TWO ON BOARD, WE CAN BE IN
AND OUT, HALF HOUR MAX. WHAT DO YOU SAY?

I REALLY DON'T THINK WE
SHOULD DO THIS, DOOGIE.

SHE'S RIGHT. DON'T EVEN ASK.

FORGET IT. I'M NOT GOING
TO SEND SIX YEARS OF WORK

DOWN THE DRAIN FOR A
MUTT WITH A BUSTED HIP.

- WHAT?
- SHH.

JACK, CURLY,

MEET RUSSELL. RUSSELL,

THIS IS JACK, THIS IS CURLY.

OHH. HI, BOY.

I REALLY HATE YOU, DOOGIE.

WHO CAN SAY NO TO THIS?

Jack: THIS IS DIRTY POOL.

I KNOW, BUT IT HAD TO BE DONE.

YOU'RE GONNA OWE ME TILL
GUAM LANDS A MAN ON THE MOON.

I KNOW... OH.

- UGH.
- HONEY, YOU'RE
A WONDERFUL SURGEON,

BUT I'M GLAD NONE OF YOUR
PATIENTS ARE FREE-RANGE CHICKENS.

THEIR LITTLE JOINTS
ARE PRETTY ORNERY.

DAD, HAVE YOU EVER PERFORMED
SURGERY ON AN ANIMAL?

NO, SON, I HAVEN'T.

- DID YOU EVER KNOW
ANYBODY WHO DID?
- CAN'T SAY I HAVE.

WHAT ABOUT TED RAINEY?

OH YES, TED RAINEY.

TED RAINEY WAS A RADIOLOGIST
I WENT TO MED SCHOOL WITH.

- HE'S THE CHEAPEST S.O.B. I EVER MET.
- DAVID.

AND ARROGANT, TOO.

ANYWAY... IT HAS TO BE AT
LEAST 10 YEARS AGO, EASY,

HIS LITTLE GIRL WANTED A PET CAT
AND TED WAS TOO CHEAP TO BUY ONE.

AND HER MOTHER TOOK
HER DOWN TO THE POUND

AND THEY PICKED OUT
AN EIGHT-WEEK-OLD KITTY.

NEEDLESS TO SAY, THE LITTLE
GIRL FALLS IN LOVE WITH THE KITTY,

AND ALSO NEEDLESS
TO SAY, 10 MONTHS LATER

THE KITTY TURNS INTO A
CAT AND GOES INTO HEAT.

SHE HAD EVERY TOM IN THE
NEIGHBORHOOD WALKING A LITTLE SILLY,

NOT TO MENTION THE HOWLINGS,
KEEPING THE NEIGHBORS UP ALL NIGHT.

SO, RATHER THAN SPEND THE 50
BUCKS TO GET THE CAT SPAYED,

RAINEY DECIDES TO DO IT HIMSELF,

AND HE GETS MARTY BEAMAN,
WHO WAS AN ANESTHESIOLOGIST,

TO HELP HIM OUT.

AND ON SATURDAY MORNING, THEY
GO INTO THE GARAGE AND THEY DO IT.

- WHAT HAPPENED?
- BEAMAN ODs THE CAT

WITH TOO MUCH
PENETHOL, KILLS IT.

AND RAINEY'S KID STARTS TO
CRY, DOESN'T STOP FOR TWO YEARS.

COST HIM A FORTUNE IN SHRINK
BILLS AND HIS WIFE DIVORCED HIM.

LIGHT MEAT OR DARK, DEAR?

- HOW'S THE PATIENT?
- FINE. HOW YOU GUYS DOING?

- FINE.
- LOOKS GOOD.

READY FOR THE KNOWLES PINS?
HAND ME THE DRILL AND THE PIN.

- HERE YOU ARE, DOCTOR.
- STEADY HIM AND RETRACT
A LITTLE BIT MORE.

GOOD SHOT, IT CAME
TOGETHER PERFECTLY.

CAN YOU HAND ME THAT WRENCH,
THE ONE WITH THE T-SHAPED HANDLE?

HERE YOU GO.

PERFECT, LIKE IT'D
NEVER BEEN BROKEN.

ONE MORE, AND WE CLOSE.

ONCE COMPLETED, THE OPERATING
ROOM WE'RE ABOUT TO SEE

WILL BE EQUIPPED WITH
LAMINAR FLOW AIR CIRCULATION

TO DECREASE THE
CHANCE OF INFECTION.

THE OPERATING
ROOM LIGHTS WILL HAVE

REMOTE CONTROL MOVEMENT AND
FOCUSING RIGHT FROM THE FIELD.

EVERYTHING, FROM PLANNING THROUGH
FINAL CONSTRUCTION AND EQUIPMENT,

COSTS ALMOST A MILLION DOLLARS.

WHAT'S THIS ALLOCATION OF
$150,000 FOR AN O.R. GALLERY?

UH, YES, SOMETHING
I'M VERY PROUD OF.

AND I KNOW YOU WILL BE, TOO.

WAIT TILL YOU SEE
THIS. RIGHT THIS WAY.

Mr. Kaya, please call security.
Mr. Kaya, please call security.

THIS PARTICULAR ROOM IS DESIGNED
WITH AN OBSERVATION GALLERY,

SO THAT IT CAN BE
USED FOR TEACHING.

WATCH YOUR STEP.

THERE IS AN INTERCOM SYSTEM THAT
ENABLES US TO COMMUNICATE DIRECTLY...

DR. CANFIELD, IT LOOKS AS THOUGH
THERE'S A SURGERY GOING ON RIGHT NOW.

I WASN'T AWARE THAT ANY SURGERIES
WERE SCHEDULED IN HERE YET.

HELLO DOWN THERE.

THIS IS DR. CANFIELD.

WHO ARE YOU, AND WHAT KIND
OF SURGERY ARE YOU DOING?

IT'S ME, DR. HOWSER, SIR.

WE'RE JUST FINISHING UP
A LITTLE MINOR SURGERY.

WE HAD TO USE THIS FACILITY.
EVERYTHING ELSE IS BACKED UP.

OH, BY THE WAY, IT'S A BEAUTY.

IT'S REALLY, REALLY VERY NICE.

DR. HOWSER... IS THAT A DOG?

OH. YES.

YES, I BELIEVE IT IS, SIR.

HOWSER...

THIS IS ABSOLUTELY THE WORST
VIOLATION OF HOSPITAL POLICY

THAT I'VE EVER SEEN
HERE AT EASTMAN.

NOT ONLY DID YOU PERFORM
SURGERY ON A CANINE

IN AN OPERATING ROOM,

BUT YOU COERCED OTHER
DOCTORS INTO ASSISTING YOU.

I TAKE FULL
RESPONSIBILITY FOR THIS.

I WANT THE NAMES OF YOUR
CO-CONSPIRATORS, DOUGLAS.

NO WAY, I CAN'T DO THAT.

YOU CAN FIRE ME
BEFORE I DO THAT.

FIRING YOU ISN'T
EVEN AN ISSUE HERE.

I TRIED TO TALK THEM OUT OF IT BECAUSE
OF MY FONDNESS FOR YOU AND YOUR FAMILY.

BUT THE BOARD HAS
OFFICIALLY SUSPENDED YOU.

AS OF THIS MOMENT,
YOU ARE OUT OF HERE.

BUT... I... I WAS JUST TRYING
TO HELP THIS KID OUT.

I WAS TRYING TO DO
SOMETHING HUMANE,

SOMETHING I SEE FAR TOO
LITTLE OF AROUND HERE.

WE'RE TURNING AWAY PEOPLE
WHO NEED MEDICAL HELP

JUST BECAUSE THEY'RE HOMELESS.
SOMETHING SHOULD BE DONE ABOUT THAT.

I DON'T DISAGREE
WITH YOU ON THAT.

BUT THE SOLUTION TO THE PROBLEM

DOESN'T LIE IN PERFORMING
COVERT SURGERY ON A CANINE.

WHERE'S THE DOG NOW?

IN RECOVERY.

I WANT IT OUT OF
HERE WITHIN 24 HOURS.

DOUGLAS.

I'M GOING TO CONTINUE TO TRY TO GET
YOU REINSTATED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.

BUT DON'T HOLD YOUR BREATH.

THANKS.

THIS IS A HUMONGOUS ZIT.

MAYBE IT'S NOT EVEN A
ZIT. IT COULD BE A VOLCANO.

I THINK I GOT IT.

THERE, LOOKS LIKE I GOT IT ALL.

- YOU ARE DEPRESSED.
- VINNIE, I WAS FIRED.

THIS IS MY LIFE WE'RE
TALKING ABOUT, MY CAREER.

- I LOVE MY WORK.
- THERE ARE PLENTY
OF HOSPITALS OUT THERE.

NONE THAT ARE
GONNA WANT A DOCTOR

WHO GOT FIRED AT THE AGE
OF 16 FOR OPERATING ON A DOG.

DON'T WORRY.
THEY'LL ASK YOU BACK.

THESE PEOPLE I'M DEALING WITH
ARE A PRETTY HEARTLESS GROUP.

YOU GOTTA APPEAL
TO THEIR COMPASSION.

THIS IS A DOG.

MAN'S BEST FRIEND.

PART OF AMERICANA.

I MEAN, WHO BARKS
AT OUR BURGLARS?

WHO BRINGS US OUR NEWSPAPERS?

WHO TREES OUR CATS? THE DOG.

CANINE AMERICANUS.

VINNIE, I'M NOT EVEN GONNA
GET A CHANCE TO APPEAL.

MAYBE YOU CAN TELL
THEM IT WAS A MISTAKE.

YOU THOUGHT IT WAS A MIDGET
WITH A HORMONE PROBLEM.

YOU'RE DEAD, AREN'T YOU?

NO, RIGHT NOW I'M JUST FIRED.

BUT WHEN MY FATHER GETS HOME,

THEN I'M GONNA BE DEAD.

YOUR MOTHER TOLD ME
WHAT HAPPENED, DOUGLAS.

DAD, I'M SORRY.

I KNOW HOW MUCH YOU'VE
SACRIFICED FOR ME...

AND I KNOW HOW MUCH MY
SUCCESS MEANS TO YOU BOTH.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY.

DOUGLAS, YOUR MOTHER AND I SOMETIMES
TAKE ISSUE WITH YOUR IMPETUOUSNESS,

BUT WE SUPPORT YOUR HUMANITY

AND YOUR INSTINCTS TO DO GOOD.

YOU CAN TEACH SOMEBODY MEDICINE.

BUT YOU CAN'T TEACH
SOMEBODY COMPASSION.

AND YOU'VE GOT THAT
IN SPADES, DOOGIE.

WE'RE VERY PROUD OF YOU.

THANKS, MOM. THANKS, DAD.

IF EASTMAN MEDICAL DOESN'T
TAKE YOU BACK, I WOULDN'T WORRY.

THERE IS ALWAYS ROOM ON
THE SHINGLE FOR HOWSER & SON.

YEAH, THAT'D BE GREAT.

AND IF THAT DOESN'T WORK OUT,
YOU CAN ALWAYS BE A VETERINARIAN.

PUT ONE OF THESE IN HIS
FOOD THREE TIMES A DAY.

KEEP HIM RESTED
FOR ANOTHER WEEK,

HE SHOULD BE UP AND MOVING SOON.

AND HE CAN'T CHASE CARS
FOR ANOTHER 27 YEARS.

- THANKS, DR. HOWSER.
- HEY, IT'S DOOGIE TO YOU.

- AND YOU BETTER
THANK THESE PEOPLE TOO.
- THANKS. FROM RUSSELL TOO.

- NO PROBLEM.
- LOOK AT THAT.

- WE'RE GONNA MISS YOU.
- OKAY.

HANG IN THERE, GUY. THIS WILL
BLOW OVER, YOU'LL BE BACK REAL SOON.

DOOGIE, NOW WHO'S
GONNA FINISH MY DESSERTS?

KEEP IN TOUCH. I MEAN IT.

COME ON, BILLY,
I'LL WALK YOU OUT.

- SEE YOU.
- BYE.

SO LONG.

Vinnie: I'M TELLING YOU, HE
SHOULD BE HERE ANY MINUTE.

THERE'S HOWSER.

THERE'S THE KID, THERE'S THE DOG
AND THERE'S YOUR PULITZER PRIZE.

Man #1: Let's do
this. Man #2: Yeah.

DR. HOWSER. JANET
FELDER, K.T.D.E. NEWS.

- VINNIE, WHAT IS THIS?
- DON'T WORRY, JUST BE YOURSELF.

WE'D LIKE TO INTERVIEW YOU ABOUT
WHAT YOU DID FOR THIS BOY AND HIS DOG.

- I DON'T KNOW, I...
- GO ON.

I GUESS IT'S ALL RIGHT.

- LET'S ROLL, STU.
- AND... GO.

THIS IS JANET FELDER
OUTSIDE EASTMAN MEDICAL.

WE'RE STANDING HERE WITH
16-YEAR-OLD DR. DOUGLAS HOWSER.

YOU MAY REMEMBER HIM
FROM A FEATURE STORY WE DID

WHEN HE FIRST CAME TO THIS
FACILITY IN SEPTEMBER OF 1988.

IS IT TRUE, DR. HOWSER,

THAT YOU'VE JUST BEEN
RELIEVED OF YOUR DUTIES?

- YES.
- TELL US WHY.

I PERFORMED A SURGICAL
PROCEDURE ON BILLY'S DOG

IN VIOLATION OF HOSPITAL POLICY.

- WHAT'S THE DOG'S NAME, SON?
- RUSSELL.

WHAT HAPPENED TO HIM, BILLY?

HE GOT CRUNCHED BY A
CAR. DOOGIE FIXED HIS LEG.

WHY DID YOU BRING HIM TO
EASTMAN MEDICAL CENTER?

'CAUSE I DIDN'T HAVE ANY
MONEY TO TAKE HIM TO THE VET.

- HOW'S RUSSELL NOW?
- GOOD. DOOGIE SAYS
HE'LL BE WALKING IN A WEEK.

I JUST HOPE DOOGIE
GETS HIS JOB BACK.

THERE YOU HAVE IT.
A BOY AND HIS DOG,

A YOUNG DOCTOR WITH A BIG HEART.

WE'LL BE FOLLOWING UP WITH FURTHER
DEVELOPMENTS AS THEY UNFOLD.

THAT'S IT.

KIDS AND DOGS, DOCTOR
HOWSER, THEY'RE IRRESISTIBLE.

WHEN THIS HITS THE EVENING NEWS, TAKE
MY WORD FOR IT, YOU'RE GONNA BE A HERO.

THANKS, BILLY.

- VINNIE, WHAT WAS ALL THIS?
- SOMETHING HAD TO BE DONE, MAN.

THE MESSAGE IS THE MEDIA.

OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT.

THE NEGATIVE PUBLICITY ATTENDANT
TO THIS LITTLE ESCAPADE OF YOURS

HAS GOTTEN OUT OF
HAND, DR. HOWSER.

THE SWITCHBOARDS ARE JAMMED.

SOME OF OUR LARGER CONTRIBUTORS

HAVE THREATENED TO TAKE
THEIR FUNDS ELSEWHERE.

SO...

NOTWITHSTANDING OUR COMPLETE
DISAPPROVAL OF YOUR BEHAVIOR,

WE'RE PREPARED TO OFFER
YOU A SECOND CHANCE.

- THANK YOU.
- THERE ARE CONDITIONS.

ABSOLUTE COMPLIANCE WITH THE
RULES AND POLICIES OF THIS HOSPITAL.

NO MORE INTERVIEWS
WITH THE PRESS.

WE WILL ISSUE A JOINT STATEMENT
ABOUT THE CONCLUSION OF THIS INCIDENT.

JUST SIGN THIS. HAVE
AN END TO THE MATTER.

DO YOU HAVE A PEN?

I DON'T THINK SO.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN,
YOU DON'T THINK SO?

I'M NOT SURE I WANT
TO WORK IN A HOSPITAL

THAT HAS NO COMPASSION FOR PEOPLE
UNLESS THEY CAN AFFORD TO PAY FOR IT.

THIS HOSPITAL CANNOT
BE IN THE BUSINESS

OF EXTENDING COMPASSION
TO EVERY STRAY DOG AND KID.

YES, BUT IT DOESN'T
EXTEND ITS COMPASSION

TO THE SICK, HOMELESS
PEOPLE WE'VE BEEN

TURNING AWAY EITHER.
AND THAT'S THE PROBLEM.

WE'VE GOT TO DRAW THE LINE
SOMEWHERE. WE'RE NOT A FREE CLINIC.

WE'RE BARELY IN
THE BLACK AS IT IS.

YOUNG MAN, ARE YOU
GOING TO SIGN THIS OR NOT?

- NO.
- WHERE ARE YOU GOING?

I'VE GOT TO RETURN TED
KOPPEL'S PHONE CALL.

WAIT A MOMENT.

WHAT WILL IT TAKE
TO KEEP YOU HERE?

GEE, I DON'T KNOW.

- A MILLION DOLLARS.
- ARE YOU JOKING?

NO, SIR. I THINK WITH
A MILLION DOLLARS

WE CAN PROBABLY SET UP A PRETTY
GOOD TREATMENT FUND FOR THE HOMELESS.

ALL RIGHT.

Woman: WHAT ARE YOU SAYING?

WE'LL FIND THE MONEY SOMEWHERE.

BUT REMEMBER, IT'S FOR
CREATURES THAT WALK UPRIGHT.

ARE WE AGREED?

YES, SIR.

YES, SIR.

WELCOME BACK, DR. HOWSER.

THANK YOU, SIR.

- HI, VINNIE.
- WHAT ARE YOU DOING? TURN THAT OFF.

- AND TURN THIS ON.
- WHY?

I'M ON THE NEWS, MAN. THEY
INTERVIEWED ME, AND I WAS TERRIFIC.

IT'S GONNA DO WONDERS
FOR MY LOVE LIFE.

- I OWE IT ALL TO YOU, PAL.
- NO, I OWE IT ALL TO YOU.

IF YOU HADN'T DONE WHAT YOU
DID, I WOULDN'T BE AT EASTMAN NOW.

YOU'RE THE BEST FRIEND
A GUY COULD EVER HAVE.

LET'S FORGET FRIENDS AND
WHO OWES WHAT TO WHO.

HERE IT IS.

Reporter: At 7:00 p.m. this
evening, a joint statement was issued

by Eastman Medical Center
stating that Dr. Douglas Howser

has been reinstated and that
a new fund has been set up,

establishing emergency
medical care for the homeless.

Standing next to me
is Vincent Delpino,

the young man who brought
Dr. Howser's plight to our attention.

Thank you, Janet. And
thank you for calling me a man.

Reporter: Vincent, you must
feel very proud of what you did

- and what
the final outcome was.
- That I do, Janet.

I did not want this community

to lose the genius
qualities of my best friend.

He's brilliant and also very
passionate about medicine.

That's something
for a 16-year-old.

Usually they're just
passionate. Believe me, I know.

I'm sure this community
owes you a debt of gratitude.

This is Janet Felder, reporting
from Eastman Medical Center...

You're a very beautiful
woman, Miss Felder.

Well... thank...

Sorry, back to you, Don and Ed.

A GUY'S GOTTA DO
WHAT A GUY'S GOTTA DO.

- AND YOU DID IT.
- I'D LOVE TO STAY AND CHAT,

BUT I CAN HEAR MY PHONE RINGING
OFF THE HOOK EVEN AS WE SPEAK.

NOW THAT I'M A
MEDIA PERSONALITY,

WOMEN ARE BREAKING THEIR
FINGERNAILS DIALING THE PHONE.

THIS IS VINNIE
DELPINO. GOOD NIGHT.

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